arintapng

[arintapng]

Gigi Hadid out in New York

[arintapng]

sadboytate:

tate quickly scrambled to his feet once arinta began mumbling about leaving again, his heart already aching at the idea. after shooting the fans an apologetic frown and a reassuring, “i swear i’ll meet everyone tomorrow after the house of blues show, i’m so sorry. i just need to walk my friend back to her hotel now, she’s not feeling good. please be careful heading back to your hotels or wherever you’re staying, take ubers and use the buddy system, okay?” there was a quiet chorus of get-well-soon’s on arinta’s behalf and small goodbyes, and he flashed them a great big grin before turning to stare the blonde down again. he shook his head firmly, feet following hers as she tried to escape him again. “arinta, at least let me walk you back to your hotel. it’s dangerous out here at night by yourself. not that you couldn’t handle it.” thankfully the girls had put faith in his words and were not following them as they began shuffling down michigan ave once more.

he paused, frantically searching her face again. there was a tinge of guilt in his stomach. maybe he shouldn’t have kissed her, maybe he was fucking it all up already. but he wasn’t going to let her run away this time. he was going to chase after her, no matter the cost. “i know i sound crazy and desperate, because i am crazy and desperate, but arinta… i already lost you once. i don’t want to lose you again.” he anxiously rubbed at his calloused fingers, nails digging into his skin. “where are you staying? i mean, honestly, my hotel is only a five minute walk from here. you could stay with me tonight if you’d like–not to like–not a booty call or anything. i can kick josh out. there’s a cafe downstairs…” the words were falling from his mouth so quickly, and they sounded more like a plea than a casual invitation. what was he supposed to do? the love of his life waltzed back into it like a hurricane, and she was ready to blow out of it just as quickly and unexpectedly as she had come in. but tate wasn’t ready to say goodbye. he needed more time, always needed more time with her.

she should have expected as much and quite honestly she almost felt bad for the girls, returning their kind words with a halfhearted smile before making her departure from the scene. the blonde folded her arms over her chest once more, hearing tate's gentle pleads out as he followed her. it make her chest hurt and quite bluntly, it made her feel like crying --- although she wouldn't. she wasn't even sure if she still could, it had been so long. she had become so numb to everything bad, that wasn't anger and deep down she knew she blamed him for it. adapt to survive and all that. the truth was it fucking hurt when her and her father fell off the face of the planet. but she made that choice and she had to stick with it. she had a responsibility and digging up the old feelings she had taken so long to bury so easily was putting all her efforts to shame.

once given the other's proposition, arinta finally came to a halt and turned to him. “look tate, i know i've been acting like this isn't a big deal, but this is a huge deal.” finally exposing herself, it was clear that she was still trying to wrap her head around the situation at hand. “it hasn't been days or weeks or months, it's been years. literal years and anything could have happened in that time --- i-i could have gone to prison, i could have gotten knocked up and had a kid, i could've become a stripper in vegas, i could've gotten married, i could've bought like fifty snakes and became the fuckin' neighborhood snake lady --- i could've done all those things.” her hands gesturing about in frustration as she continued her tirade. “and then this happens and you're giving me that look you give like now everything's right in the world and things can just go back to how they were, like it's that easy but it's not.” there was a desperation in her words, asking him to understand what she was saying, that this was the furthest thing from a simple scenario, for her at the very least. “and i shouldn't have come out here with you in the first place, i shouldn't have called you out when i realised it was you, i shouldn't have gone to that hotel room --- and i especially shouldn't have given you these expectations, fuck.” she cursed, fingers running back through her hair as she progressively got more and more worked up before her mind clicked in and the real icing on the cake hit. “and i need to call my dad and i left my fucking purse in your fucking hotel room!” she shouted in complete frustration before plowing her fist into a nearby street lamp. “fuck!”

the blonde turned to lean against the post, cradling her newly pain stricken fist in her opposite hand as she sunk into a crouching position. a sigh finally leaving her lungs, her head tilting back against the street lamp as she shook her head and averted her gaze. a single tear escaped to glide down her cheek, but she hardly cared at this point. “i hate this... god, i hate this.” her final words coming in the form of a soft mumble.

[arintapng]

tatepowell:

he turned his head again to glance at her at her words that seemed more like a dare than anything. his chest panged, and he furrowed his brows as he too shifted in the grass, propping his head up onto his hand and laying on his side. their gazes were deeply intertwined with one another, tate searching her eyes for any hint of something more, for that sparkle that used to be there whenever he would tell her he loved her. the world had stopped on its axel for them as they lay there, not breathing or batting an eyelash. tate’s lips suddenly quirked into a slight smile at the corner, his hand reaching out to cup her warm cheek. without another breath, he leaned in and pressed his lips to hers, reveling in the taste of her that he had nearly forgotten. he breathed her in like a freshly lit candle, wallowing in her very essence as his heart expanded. when the burning in his lungs became too much, an inch of space separated them and he allowed the air to fill him up again instead of her. still, his breath ghosted over her plush mouth. “we both know neither of us would’ve wanted that. i’m… so happy.” his fingers were still curled around the curve of her jaw and cords of her neck, his thumb brushing languidly across her cheekbone.

just as he was about to erase the needless space between them once more, the sounds of gentle, unfamiliar voices calling to him drew him out of his reverie. he sat up a little, wide eyes scanning the perimeter to find the same group of girls headed their way. tate dropped his head, eyes squeezing shut. the one time he didn’t want to see fans, they fucking show up. regretfully he looked to arinta, lips now pursed into a frown, brows knitted together in frustration. “hang on. please.” sitting up fully, he turned his attention to the five girls waiting several feet away, as if awaiting permission to approach. “hey, girls, it’s really not a good time. i’m sorry.” he was scared–petrified even. the world had started spinning again, and he was afraid that now she would get swept up in the orbit and drift away from him again.

naturally as his hand cupped her cheek, just as it had countless times in the past, she couldn't refrain from leaning into it ever so slightly. it was familiar, dangerously so, but of course she missed it. and as the boy leant in, it was as if the entire world had gone silent, aside from the beating of her own heart. it was deafening at this point, drowning out any warnings from her mind. although once their lips met it was like he was pouring into her chest all over again and just when she thought that maybe she had finally drained him out. her oceanic gaze however lowered once they parted. a small smiled formed at his words, although they were heavy on her shoulders. she was setting expectations and that overwhelming feeling was returning. before she could reply she was blessed with a sense of relief falling over her once they were interrupted, giving her time to catch her breath.

“yeah,” arinta managed to reply, a soft nod accompanying her words. the blonde rolled onto her back for a moment, releasing a deep sigh before she sat up, as the conversation between tate and his fans persisted. “hey, it's fine,” she added with slim fingers smoothing over her long locks, suddenly feeling incredibly awkward. “i should probably take off or whatever anyway ...” icy hues flickered between the group of girls and the boy beside her as she slowly rose to her feet. “i mean my dad's probably wondering where i am so it’s whatever ...” despite the nonchalance having returned to her tone, there remained a weight to her words. and that’s because her and tate both probably knew it was simply her trying to get out of an uncomfortable situation. right now she was regretting allowing him to kiss her. it was a gesture that held too many promises she couldn’t keep.

[arintapng]

sadboytate:

maybe he had (naively) thought that things would be easy like a lazy river, like the time and distance always hanging between them wouldn’t have changed a thing. maybe he thought that because in reality, none of that did chance anything for tate. he still felt the same way he did the first time he locked eyes on that wanderess before him, and that feeling would stain his insides for the rest of his life. she had never been easy for him to read. he was foolish to think she might be now, despite their long-awaited, inevitable reunion. cautiously he followed, falling down into the grass beside her and peering up at the stars with a little less wonder. all of his awe had been drained by arinta. at her question, he tilted his head to gaze at her. his lips parted slightly, lids low and cheeks flushed. “arinta,” he began, only to purse his lips into a thin line. instead of letting the words he’d kept in his heart for years for her spill out of his mouth, tate simply sighed, allowed his eyes to fall closed, and rested his hands on his chest. “yeah. chicago. you and my band mate getting it on in my hotel room in chicago.” could he make light of the situation? could he make her laugh? could he at least make her smile? or would this fleeting moment between them, this probable one night stand, destroy the wonder, and the hope, and the slumbering love within him.

the way her name left his lips caused a pit of anxiety to well up inside of her. the girl could tell by his tone that he intended for there to be more to follow. perhaps an inquiry for the explanation he so rightfully deserved or maybe a scolding for doing the thing she was best at, leaving. or maybe he wanted to tell her that after her absence he still loved her, or perhaps the complete opposite --- she couldn't quite decide which would be worse. tate was the only boy that could make her anxious like this but thankfully he moved on and her worries subsided a little, but none the less it was still like treading on eggshells. especially once the boy brought up the cause for their little reunion. there was a small twinge of guilt, but she told herself she wouldn't apologise for the incident. why would she? it's not as if it was some calculated plan to get his attention --- although looking back at it now, it might have really seemed that way. “yeah, well, what can i say? i have a type, apparently.” she replied, her head turning to glance at the boy beside her momentarily. “y’know i didn't actually believe him when he said he was a musician. i just thought he was taking advantage of the groups of girls that had been lingering in front of the hotel on and off to talk himself up. so many guys say that kind of shit, but he wasn’t bad to look at so what did i care?” a small shrug tugged at her shoulders before she shook her head at her reflection of the night. “maybe i should of made the effort to google him first,” arinta continued before rolling onto her side to face the boy, her gaze rolling over him. “could have avoided this whole thing.” her tone didn’t convey that, that was what she wanted. it was more so a sly attempt to see if maybe that’s what he wanted.

[arintapng]

Her eyes lit his starless nights.

six word story /// the-typewriter-is-holy (via thesocietyofpoets)

[arintapng]

I fell in love because she made the world silent when it got too loud.

livewireonfire (via dianafarley)

[arintapng]

It’s easy to take off your clothes and have sex. People do it all the time. But opening up your soul to someone, letting them into your spirit, thoughts, fears, future, hopes, dreams… that is being naked.

Rob Bell (via thelovejournals)

[arintapng]

[arintapng]

[arintapng]

She looked at nice young men as if she could smell their stupidity.

Flannery O’Connor (via feellng)

[arintapng]

Cami: “🍒🍒”

[arintapng]

[arintapng]

[arintapng]

[arintapng]

[arintapng]

sadboytate:

he chuckled lowly at her comment, ruffling up his hair and making it stick up in all different ways like he had just rolled out of bed. “honestly, yeah probably. i’m starting to get pretty famous. it’s weird.” his eyes twinkled at the revelation, though. it was his dream, after all–it always had been. it would never not be strange to have a person come up to him, someone he had never met before, and talk to him about his music, ask him for his picture. still, he knew the more it happened, the more famous he was getting, and that was an accomplishment as it came with the territory. “don’t worry, though, i’ll wear a hood and try to be lowkey.” he offered her his hand, a hopeful gleam in his eyes as he prayed she would entwine her fingers with his. with the other hand, he stuck the joint between his lips and mumbled around the end of it, “come with me.”

a black hood cloaked his face as the pair wandered through the still bustling streets of chicago nearing midnight. the city lights were twinkling like stars against the colorless blanket of the night sky, and the soft breeze was cold on his exposed forearms. no one had noticed them yet, or at least it seemed. but there were a few girls trailing behind him and arinta that tate kept watch on through his peripheral. ignoring the possible fans stalking them as they made their way across michigan ave, tate offered arinta his hand once more, just wanting to be with her again. “wanna lay down here?” he nodded towards the green expanse against concrete and a water fountain in wrigley square. “count the stars?”

it was odd but not entirely unpredicted. arinta living her life so incredibly lowkey that for all that most knew she practically didn't even exist anymore. tate on the other hand was in the spot light, everybody was watching him so closely to the point where he had to conceal himself whenever he entered the streets. the blonde definitely did not envy that aspect of his life. after all, the best thing about 'not existing' was the fact she could pretend to be whoever she wanted, whenever she wanted and usually without consequence. that is, up until she ran into somebody she knew.

a playful roll of the eyes came with his reassurance on being as lowkey as possible. although once her gaze met the offered hand it took her a moment to weigh her options. she had already made it clear to herself that she wasn't to get too cosy and quite frankly she wanted to decline the offer but she could only imagine the potential problems that could arise because of it. so shaking her head at her own idiocy the girl then took his hand as if she hadn't just had an internal debate on the subject. “ sure. ” fortunately, her tone disguised her regret well. it had been years and she still couldn't quite navigate herself away from such situations. she knew it was only a disaster waiting to happen.

having made it into the streets arinta walked with arms folded over her chest, preventing any further heat from her body from escaping. the weather hadn't exactly been on her mind when choosing her outfit for the evening, nor had the fact she may have to lash out at a stalker for getting too close. or perhaps that would be a good thing, having fans approach, so it wasn't just the two of them. either way, it definitely gave her something else to focus on for the duration of their walk, until they reached they apparent destination.

gaze falling upon an out-reached hand once again, a sigh passed her lips. it was one or the other, she didn't get to be self-indulgent or so she told herself. “ sure. ” she replied once more, as if it was the only phrase she was capable of. however taking a few steps toward the grassy stretch, arinta left his hand behind. kicking her heels off before moving ahead of the boy completely. once reaching the center, her chin was already tilted upwards, icy hues set upon the night sky. she remained for only a few seconds before she lowered herself to lay back into the grass, feigning nonchalance as she awaited tate to inevitably join her. it wasn't long before absentminded words left her lips, anything to delay the interrogation she was expecting. “ so chicago, huh? ”

[arintapng]

Gigi Hadid onstage at the 2016 HeartRADIO MuchMusic Video Awards at MuchMusic on June 19, 2016 in Toronto, Canada.