applesboys

[applesboys]

i’m so fucking cold but i kinda like it

(side effects are so bad but feel so good cause i know how i got them)

[applesboys]

guys i have a genuine question

if i have a doctor’s appointment and need to gain around 15-20 pounds prior to the visit, how many months in advance should i start eating like a normal human being??

or is there a way to do so without gaining all the weight back..??

cause i need to like prepare to do that😀

the thought of being admitted to a hospital for losing this much weight scares me

[applesboys]

does anyone know why carbs are actually demons in my mind?? but like only specific forms..

[applesboys]

someone told me that i look healthy now.. WHAT??

[applesboys]

skinny skinny skinny

GIVE IT TO ME.

[applesboys]

this is the first time that this has happened since i got heavily invested in my ed so this is kind of scary.

yk how i said that i was a cis guy’s gay awakening?? it was so weird getting that attention from him n its like bittersweet to think about because i know that wouldn’t have happened if i were at my sw.

it’s like i wanna feed into my ed more now cause it felt nice to not be seen as ugly and fat, yk?

like i did not gain my ed from wanting attention. i got it from being ridiculed and NOT wanting attention. but now it’s weird?? i don’t know.

[applesboys]

was it wise to take a lax while sick? no.

will i face the consequences of my actions later? yes.

[applesboys]

guys i got called skinny today by a classmate :)

[applesboys]

REAL. or even just friends who work out a lot😭

its actually so embarrassing to have a bf/situationship whos constantly working out, like hes SO trained and im out here dodging food like bullets💀

[applesboys]

GUYS I JSUT FOUND OUT THAT I WAS A CIS GUY’S GAY AWAKENING AHAHAHAH

this feels like an accomplishment

[applesboys]

i wanna get a food scale so bad omfg

[applesboys]

where are all the male ed havers 🔥🔥🔥🔥

i keep seeing posts that go like "cmon, be a pretty, feminine, petite, girlypop girly girl by starving" or whatever but like i want to be a skinny male punk up on a stage on the verge of passing out while playing bass and guitar on heavy drugs, cigarettes and white monster.

[applesboys]

Okay so. I've seen my fair share of transphobia on edblr [for crying out loud you're on THE lgbt app] and I'm just going to say that transgender people have the HIGHEST RATE OF EATING DISORDERS.

[do not reblog with tags]

Statistically 71% of transgender individuals currently or have previously at some point in their lives struggled with an eating disorder.

But why do so many trans people develop eating disorders you may ask? The biggest factor is: Discrimination. All around, discrimination leads to the development of severe disorders. The other major reason is gender dysphoria, with GD comes the feeling that you lack control over your body which is generally a huge contributor to eating disorders but most trans people tend to live in unaccepting or downright hateful environments basically leading to lack of control x2.

Trans people will also develop eating disorders to change their bodies in very drastic ways, especially when there is no access to gender affirming care like for trans men, top surgery and for trans women, to give a more sleek feminine look to the body.

I specifically see a lot of cisgender men in ed spaces complaining about the prevalence of trans men in the "male ed" tags but I'm going to pull another stat on you- 42% of cisgender men who struggle with eating disorders are also part of the lgbt community, so if you're part of that 42% and are still being transphobic, you should look into lgbt history in general and thank the group that gave you your rights. If you're a cis straight male complaining about trans people struggling with eating disorders, just remember that plenty of people will never even entertain the thought that you have a "woman disorder".

So if you're out here bitching about "why are there trans men in the checks tags" and plenty more hateful shit that I do not feel comfortable quoting- just think about this, statistically there is just going to be an "overwhelming" amount of trans people in all online ed communities. If you aren't comfortable with that then it's probably time you recover babe <3

[applesboys]

THIS. like can we acknowledge that we still eat less than the average “normal” human😭 it doesn’t HAVE to be absolutely zero calories to be disordered. calories are not what an ed it👎

how it feels having a 900-1000 cal intake on edblr while everyone else eats 0-200 cals

[applesboys]

YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY *WINNING* TODAY AND IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU

THANK YOU SM. i’m so happy too aaaa

[applesboys]

the skinny is skinnying today😱

(bc below the line)

[applesboys]

guys it’s crazy to think about but i’m basically ten pounds away from my ugw..