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I feel I see I do I grow

by me

White chalk and gel pen, coal on black cardboard

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Revelation by malamila

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Electron microscope video of a needle on a vinyl record.

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Support your indie and nb and trans authors! 60 flash fiction tales from writers from all over the world.

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Temples are built for gods. Knowing this a farmer builds a small temple to see what kind of god turns up.

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What to do if you suddenly find yourself homeless

FOOD

Find your nearest food bank or mission, for food

grocery stores with free samples, bakeries + stores with day-old bread

different fast food outlets have cheaper food and will generally let you hang out for a while.

some dollar stores carry food like cans of beans or fruit

SHELTER

Sleeping at beaches during the day is a good way to avoid suspicion and harassment

sleep with your bag strapped to you, so someone can’t steal it

Some churches offer short term residence

Find your nearest homeless shelter

Look for places that are open to the public

A large dumpster near a wall can often be moved so that flipping up the lids creates an angled shelter to stay dry

HYGIENE

A membership to the YMCA is usually only 10$, which has a shower, and sometimes laundry machines and lockers.

Public libraries have bathrooms you can use

Dollar stores carry low-end soaps and deodorant etc.

Wet wipes are all purpose and a life saver

Local beaches, go for a quick swim

Some truck stops have showers you can pay for

Staying clean is the best way to prevent disease, and potentially get a job to get back on your feet

Pack 7 pairs of socks/undies, 2 outfits, and one hooded rain jacket

OTHER

first aid kit

 sunscreen

 a travel alarm clock or watch

 mylar emergency blanket

 a backpack is a must

 downgrade your cellphone to a pay as you go with top-up cards

 sleeping bag

 travel kit of toothbrush, hair brush/comb, mirror

 swiss army knife

 can opener

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Reading a book about slavery in the middle-ages, and as the author sorts through different source materials from different eras, I am starting to understand why so many completely fantastical accounts of "faraway lands" went without as much as a shrug. The world is such a weird place that you can either refuse to believe any of it or just go "yeah that might as well happen" and carry on with your day.

There was this 10th century arab traveller who wrote into an account that the fine trade furs come from a land where the night only lasts one hour in the summer and the sun doesn't rise at all in the winter, people use dogs to travel, and where children have white hair. I don't think I'd believe something like that either if I didn't live here.

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If you only knew

I fear that you do

I fear I will hurt you

hence I’m hiding from you

I want to to be near

I hold you so dear

I root for you always

delight you with my cheers

alone in the darkness

just you and my tears

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"𝓦𝓮'𝓻𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓪 𝓵𝓲𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓲𝓻𝓭, 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓵𝓲𝓯𝓮'𝓼 𝓪 𝓵𝓲𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓲𝓻𝓭. 𝓐𝓷𝓭 𝔀𝓱𝓮𝓷 𝔀𝓮 𝓯𝓲𝓷𝓭 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓮 𝔀𝓱𝓸𝓼𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓲𝓻𝓭𝓷𝓮𝓼𝓼 𝓲𝓼 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓹𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓫𝓵𝓮 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓼, 𝔀𝓮 𝓳𝓸𝓲𝓷 𝓾𝓹 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓶 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓯𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓲𝓷 𝓶𝓾𝓽𝓾𝓪𝓵 𝔀𝓮𝓲𝓻𝓭𝓷𝓮𝓼𝓼 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓬𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓲𝓽 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮."

- 𝓓𝓻. 𝓢𝓮𝓾𝓼𝓼

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I had seriously thought I had found a friend. But it seems that I am just too intense for many people. I try to hold back, but I am a cheerful and positive person who gives bear hugs and makes silly jokes. I send xmas gifts and if I notice you’re missing 3+ days I’ll ask if everything is ok. Some see that as intrusion of boundaries (even after one year of being friends and talking daily, I think it‘s just normal for friends, isn’t it? I don‘t even expect a reply, I just want to offer a hand if one is needed)

I know that can be obnoxious to people who are in a depressed phase. I try to fit in, but I don‘t. I try to adapt my behaviour without being silenced. But I cannot tiptoe around being myself and hands-on optimistic self all the time.

I have agency. I have a job. I have a home. I find solutions and work on them, even if the odds are stacked against me. Just out of spite. I am resilient as fxxx, I have grit and perseverence. I have nerves of steele.

I am nonbinary, not restrained by gender norms. I laugh when I find something funny. If I like you, I‘ll tell you. I am very simple minded when it comes to relationships. I function like a dog: tail wag or growl. I can be as overexcited as a puppy. I know that it‘s obnoxious.

I have my problems and not a few of them. But I don‘t burden other people with them. I love to help and I do, when I can.

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“Start now. Start where you are. Start with fear. Start with pain. Start with doubt. Start with hands shaking. Start with voice trembling but start. Start and don’t stop. Start where you are, with what you have. Just… start.”

— Ijeoma Umebinyuo