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i love the concept of divorce lawyers. the only things in the world that have the power to undo your marriage are death itself or a special little boy with a law degree.

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ASDFGHJKL

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I love the idea that Dick and Roy were together at one point, with Jason and Roy now being together, simply for Tim's reaction.

The first words out of his mouth just being "what, you fucking down the family line or something?" Followed by a suspicious squint and asking "do I need to be worried if you guys break up?"

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Jason and Damian meet in the LoA AU where Damian vehemently insists that Jason is his only real brother since they have the same mother and father. The others try to tell him that Jason is also adopted, but Damian will just stare at them like they are stupid and go "is Father not his Father in the eyes of the law?"

"Well, yeah, but-"

"Does Mother not call him as her son?"

"I mean she does-"

"Are they not my Mother and Father as well?"

"Yes?"

"The matter has been concluded, then, Richard."

"What about me? Bruce is also my dad on paper?"

"You get half of the acknownledgement, of course, as you have been getting so far."

"What about Tim, then?"

"I don't see how he is relevant to this conversation."

"I'm just curious where he lands on the brother percentage scale."

"Nowhere. Timothy is a neighbour. Though I shall offer him hospitality while he is under our roof."

"You tripped him on the patrol last night."

"Does the alleyway look like our house to you?"

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People who are not afraid to text you 40 times in a row and don’t take it personally if you haven’t replied are literally the most valuable members of our society and should be recognized as such

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Oh, this red string you see wrapped around my finger? You're asking if it connects me to my one true love? An understandable mistake, but I'm aromantic. This is for my conspiracy board.

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Batfamily Nickname Headcanons

Dick and Jason sometimes went by Dickie and Jay when they were younger. Bruce, Dick, Barbara, and Jason, who were around for this period, will occasionally use those nicknames. The younger Bats will not, because “it just feels weird.”

The first time Damian used Tim’s first name, he called him Timothy. Tim, who was incredibly sleep-deprived and in the middle of a League of Assassins case, thought it was Ra’s and reacted poorly (that is to say, he attempted to slash him across the face with his surprise bo staff knife, but Damian was saved by the fact that he’s over a foot shorter than his grandfather). Damian believed that Tim took offense and returned to calling him Drake. Tim filed the incident as a hallucination in his memories. This misunderstanding took an inordinately long time to clear up.

The nickname “B” was coined by an eight-year-old Dick after he accidentally called Bruce “Batman” following a civilian kidnapping. Thankfully, his words were slurred, so Bruce convinced the police he was saying “bad man” about the kidnappers. To avoid this mistake happening again, Dick started using “B” in situations where he wasn’t paying much attention to his words or was uncertain. As he grew older, he didn’t need the crutch anymore due to his compartmentalization skills, but he kept it as an affectionate nickname.

After Dick got into an argument with Bruce and Jason accidentally interfered in Dick’s work, Dick called Jason something in Tamaranean a couple times which basically equates to our understanding of “little shit”. Jason decided it sounded awesome. A couple months later, Jason asked Dick what it meant. Dick, who felt really bad, didn’t want to hurt Jason’s feelings and told him it meant “little brother”. Jason now calls his little brothers that word when talking to Starfire. She never corrects him, because she figures he has the correct translation and knows what he’s saying—Tim and Damian are indeed little shits.

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last week i woke up from one of the most fucked up nightmares ive ever had with that middle panel burned into my brain. like the exact wording and the exact apartment and the exact squidward. i feel like if i didnt make it real something bad wouldve happened. anyway todays upload is spunchbob comic oc

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(inspired very much by this lovely post)

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her pronouns are HE/HIM

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I miss tma season one when Jon puts his whole archivussy into a statement and then ends it by saying "yeah lmao this probably didn't happen. I asked Martin to look into it and he found nothing because he sucks and I hate him. Tim got me more information, probably because he's such a fucking slut. Sasha was also very useful. I love Sasha because she's so dependable and trustworthy. Nothing bad will ever happen to Sasha to make her less dependable or trustworthy."

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Dick: I can't move. Tim's asleep on me.

Jason: Push him off.

Dick: *quiet enraged and offended noises*

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An embroidery of the Wikipedia page for embroidery.

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can I just log in