anpanmar

[anpanmar]

I keep thinking about that time a fan asked Stephen Hawking about Zayn leaving the band and how he said there are infinite parallel universes and that in at least one, Zayn would still be in One Direction.

The thought that there are infinite parallel universes is comforting to me right now.

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Those 5 boys and the community around them held such a strong role in shaping me and knowing one of them is just... no more... I can't explain this feeling.

[anpanmar]

The worst part about Liam Payne dying is that people are posting about “the switch up is crazy”

Like no. He was an abuser and made horrible decisions, but nobody wanted him to die. He was getting hate for an INCREDIBLY valid reason, but we all recognized that he needed mental and physical help. He needed to go to rehab. He needed to get away from drugs and alcohol and improve upon himself away from the public. No one wanted him to die.

We’re not mourning the life of an abuser, we are mourning the part of him that we adored and looked up to for a massive part of our childhood/ teenage years. He was a huge part of how I was introduced to my love of music. And yes, he did horrible things and made horrible decisions and over the last few years has been anything but admirable, but none of us wanted this.

Maya didn’t want this. And everyone saying that it’s her fault can actually go burn in hell. She likely already blames herself enough. She likely already wishes she hadn’t spoken up about it out of the guilt that she likely feels. You guys commenting all over the socials about how this is her fault and “are you happy now?” Are actually horrible people.

A 7 year old boy just lost his father. A woman just lost her long term boyfriend. Two parents just lost their son. Several young children just lost their uncle. Show some fucking respect. Joking about it and hating on people who had nothing to do with what happened is not doing anything but twist the knife for the people who this has ACTUALLY effected.

[anpanmar]

When it suddenly crashes on you that it is real and not just a nightmare, and the dam of tears breaks 💔

[anpanmar]

Louis and Liam pouring powerade on each other during Best Song Ever, 28/07/15

[anpanmar]

[anpanmar]

I used to watch and rewatch the One Direction video diaries from the X-Factor since they distracted me from my teen angst, and it's just so surreal that Liam is gone

[anpanmar]

women in STEM (shitty posture, tired all the time, eyebags, miserable)

[anpanmar]

you know the post that's like: one day I'll be 45 at a party and ill hear a one direction song and ill be dancing my heart out because I never learned to love anything as much as I love one direction?......... yeah.......thinking of that right now

[anpanmar]

Yuta's glow up will always amaze me even in my 80s

What did bro do in Africa 😭

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halloween time 🎃🎃🎃

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one direction will always be so so so bittersweet to me like they were such a foundation of my teenage years while at the same time those boys were spending most of their days trapped in hotel rooms or waking up at 2 am to record an album and non stop touring and working so much more than anyone let alone a bunch of teenage boys should work and its always been hard to reconcile those two realities especially on a day like today because god when they were good together, they were so good together.

and i just don't think anything like them will ever happen again. 5 boys from basically working class backgrounds thrust into a level of fame the height of which hadn't been seen for decades, all of them becoming the breadwinners of their families before the age of 18. the immense pressure but also the amount of fun they were. the tragedy and joy of it all intertwined. really impossible to put into words

[anpanmar]

i can't move past Louis' "A message to you Liam if you’re listening" and Zayn's "Liam, I have found myself talking out loud to you, hoping you can hear me" because there was STILL SO MUCH left unsaid.

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I’m full of yearning and microplastics

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Park Jimin is literally an in real life bratz doll and no one can tell me otherwise!!!

(crtto)

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"I have love and dreams too."

*Loud sobbing*

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i’m so glad earth only has one moon, if there were more i’d have to pick a favorite and that sounds too emotionally taxing to even fathom