Void/Astral | she/her | 20+ | sapphic ace Please read my carrd before following!My inbox is open; it has 0 pending asks
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*flops* well, so that ends
I don’t really think it’s an exaggeration to call this year the worst of my life so far. Between: starting it off in the first two weeks with a bad enough panic attack to force me off my medication for the rest of the year, two group projects riddled with unnecessary trouble and my lowest mark so far for making the mistake of taking a module outside of my school (in a year where that sort of thing counts), an uselessly intense field course in the blazing heat of summer, which led into internship work I was very much thrown in the deep end for, a semester even worse than the one the year before that was claimed to have been hardest, the worst-timed week of food poisoning right as the exam season started, and the looming dread of all that still needs doing.. yes, it’s perhaps no wonder I’m so worn out as I write this.
On the outside, it looked like a good year for me as a person. It's just me myself who knows the truth of how broken I've ended up to get there.
No whole year can be completely without goodness, though (I hope). Offline, I got the highest marks in both of my required courses from last year, and online, Origins restarted and we started the incredible unsynced adventures as the Dandelions. And I finally figured out how to exist on tumblr in a way I enjoy (by having two primary blogs)! But.. you'll notice only one of those is something that actually matters offline. Which is sad. I wish I could get excited about things that matter for my future as a person (instead of my immediate wellbeing). And next year has so many exciting things! I'm going to graduate! I'm going to become an aunt! I'm going to be a bridesmaid! I'm hopefully going to have some answers about why my body is causing me problems! I just.. really hope I can get there!
I am very very grateful for the friends I have been able to maintain. The fact people still want to be around me as I want to be around them is something I truly treasure. So, thank you all for tolerating this selfish thing.
May next year be better for us all.
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"The creator definitely didn't put that much thought into it" well then clearly someone else has to and I think I'm the weirdo for the job
#‘tis I - your local spotter of hints that aren’t actually there because my brain goes on tangents =P#fatebreakers tag#reblog tag
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#the inside of a house in daybreak town which is decorated with things from different worlds#this place is where I keep things I enjoy or want to keep track of#and I was (am) one of the sapphires of anguis. hence the URL#something to keep track of#reblog games#reblog tag
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losing my mind at twenty to midnight 'cause a minecraft series I watch on youtube is tying back to another minecraft series from like 12 years ago that I was obsessed with
#i don't know if anyone else here knows of it but it was called blackrock chronicles. shoutout also to flux buddies which I liked similarly#that entire era of series and the ones that went on from alongside it were just. good grief they occupied a niche in my soul#one too deeply-rooted to realise how far in it'd gone until something like THIS happens again to unearth such#i am lost in a sea of hype and nostalgia for something I only half-remember details of but was INCREDIBLY shaped by the vibes/concepts of#good *grief*#a call from the void#having a moment#you know when you hadn't realised how much something used to mean to you and then it sinks in??? think I might be experiencing that
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women are really hot. did you guys know this
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Quick what are you doing RIGHT now (besides scrolling Tumblr)
#trying to eat a bowl of cereal + calm my nerves ahead of my exam this afternoon#neither is working particularly well but an attempt is being made#reblog game#reblog tag
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it’s gone eleven o’clock in the morning. I have yet to get out of bed. I have an exam in three days.
#a call from the void#*flops*#I don’t want to do anything right now#today’s tasks are: eat something (ideally more than twice)#start revising for the aforementioned exam#and possibly do the washing (though that can wait at least a small bit more)#then for fun things: type up the final fantasy wedding invites and do tails duties with friends
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No, stop that. Stop drawing popular girl from new AAA slop game or the new shonen anime. You need to find a secondary character from a 10-25 year old jrpg and let it be your muse, like a real artist
#I don’t really regularly draw or anything but this for me is pavo dragon quest#yes of course I would get this attached to a character from one of my favourite games of all time#no it didn’t have to be the one who only has one purpose and postgame quest and that’s it#but here we wre#reblog tag#miscellaneous tag
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people who find it easy to do things have no idea how hard it is to do things
#me this entire weekend#i just want to eat like a normal person okay#reblog tag#also me with like any chores ever
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I love giving names to my friend groups
#dandelions.. funky fresh lads.. sciencegirls?.. fatebreakers.. comfee people.. scampers..#(the ? in sciencegirls? is deliberate because that’s exactly how our group chat name is written)#most of the time these names are just the names of the servers/group chats each group makes up. but even so#and there are more names too! and some friend groups I don’t actually have names for!#but it’s just a bit of fun for me to use a group name in conversation if you ask me#probably stems from talking about my KHUX party as the sapphires I reckon#a call from the void#miscellaneous tag#shoutout to anyone who knows which groups these are because I know there is some overlap#my two treasured online friends and I don’t actually have a name for our group/trio.. maybe we can be something#the first thing that came to mind was team ABC because of our names but. I don’t know.#I think I just need to go to bed it’s nearly midnight
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the most powerful writing tool is actually Brainstorming With The Girls
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i respect those people who have sideblogs for all their different interests, if you follow me, you’ll just have to accept you’ll be submitted to whatever nonsense i’m into at the moment
#it’s because I want to have a blog theme and URL that matches my interests#but for all of them at once#so if I have lots of secondary blogs I can use all the different themes and tag styles at once =D#reblog tag
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reblog to tell the person you reblogged this from that what they create is wonderful
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"Don't worry my beautiful mutual, I'll save you!" *Changes your two note flop post into a four note flop post*
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#ABSOLUTELY#i'd put it on my series-specific sideblog but that gives away what it's from#reblog games#reblog tag
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I have an exam in 40 minutes. Why is the Wombles theme stuck in my head.
#absolutely nothing has sparked this! and yet!!!#a call from the void#posts made by me#it isn’t even the entire theme it’s only the first two lines#“underground - overground - wombling free~’’#“the wombles of wimbledon common are we~’’#like i need science to be in that space!! for my data analysis test!! *that I am about to take!!!*
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who am i if not a guy who wears the same stupid little necklace. All the time.
#okay this has been in my drafts since like. may. sorry friend#but I can confirm that days when I wear one of my necklaces tend to be more okay than ones where I don’t#it’s either what I call my DQIX one (gold and silver wings on a silver chain)#or my miniature aqua’s wayfinder and pāua shell butterfly (which are on the same thread)#the butterfly used to have its own thread but it was too thick so it always sat weirdly on my neck#reblog tag#miscellaneous tag
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