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angelthefandomobsessed · 1 month ago

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Malleus Draconia and the Cognitive Dissonance of being a Lonely Prince

A character analysis exploring Malleus’ conflicting views of self

Malleus has two primary characteristics that are significant to his identity: (1) His role as a highly revered, feared, and praised mage & prince and (2) His loneliness and social/emotional isolation.

In Malleus’ concept of identity, these two characteristics are in conflict with each other, despite one somewhat being caused by the other. How can a person reconcile the fact that they are supposedly extraordinarily special, talented, attractive (this is canon in universe btw lol), intelligent, beyond powerful, etc. - essentially a perfect prince - with the fact that they have no friends and barely anyone who cares about them (excluding those he feels are obligated to care)?

Malleus has no strong emotional connection with anyone that is not his family (I include Lilia in this category) or one of his guards (who, in spite of Sebek’s protests, is basically obligated - socially or role wise - to respect and love him). Now, I don’t think any of these relationships is obligatory or disingenuous in any way. Lilia, Silver, and Sebek all genuinely love and care for Malleus. However, I’d argue that isn’t how Malleus sees it (I’ll get into this later).

First, I wanna go into the first characteristic I mentioned, him being revered (+feared) because of his status and capabilities.

Before I even get into him as an individual, let’s look at how Malleus himself perceives the mere status of royalty:

Malleus believes (I suppose because of his personal circumstances) that people who are royalty inherently deserve respect. He even extends this to Leona, who he has a (playfully?) hostile relationship with. I don’t think there’s canon indication that this necessarily means he looks down on people of non-noble birth or anything, but he’s still stuck on this idea that, in certain respects, royalty does deserve better than the average person.

Clearly, this would extend to himself as well. Part of his self-image is kind of decided from birth (in an interesting parallel to Leona who believes that his own status as a second son decides his fate from birth) because he is raised in this environment where he is constantly told that he is better than others, simply because he is a prince.

That said, Malleus takes being royalty and a leader very seriously. I’d argue he believes that because he is ‘better’ than others, he has certain responsibilities and duties that he must complete, as shown above.

Part of this also means that Malleus takes himself very seriously - he isn’t allowed to even try to be normal, because he always has to keep himself in check. Anything he does will reflect poorly upon himself and his family, and this is something Lilia reminds him of.

Here’s where I’ll talk about Malleus’ relationships with the rest of Diasomnia.

Now, Lilia is clearly the person who treats him the most casually and normally. He knows Malleus very well, to the point where he can read his emotions - namely his jealously/bitterness/frustration after being left out of something.

Lilia encourages Malleus the most to try and have normal experiences. He understands Malleus’ loneliness, and wants him to make friends - to seek out more than he could have all alone in his castle. But, Lilia also has times where he acts as more than a mere guardian to Malleus. I can’t find the screenshot, but I remember Lilia reminding Malleus about what behaviour is and is not befitting of an heir, so that aspect of their relationship is still something to take note of. Even Lilia, who understands him better than anyone, still must wish for him to be the best heir and prince (sometimes sacrificing his own wants, although Lilia probably does this the least considering he knows Malleus’ feelings).

It’s no exaggeration to say that Sebek worships Malleus to the highest extent (just look at the portrait of him in his room). The way Sebek talks about him isn’t at all like a friend or even family - Malleus is a god to him. I argue that Sebek’s behaviour specifically (he would cry if he knew this) distances him the most from Malleus emotionally.

This will be explored more later on, but what Malleus wants is to be treated somewhat normally, at least by a few people he can be close with. Sebek does the opposite of this. While the students who are scared of Malleus isolate him because of their fear, Sebek actually accidentally isolates him because of his dedication and worship. Thus, both Sebek and others isolate Malleus through their treatment of him because of his position/status/strength.

Malleus certainly cares for Sebek, but I don’t believe he thinks of him as a genuine friend (and that’s not meant as a way to dismiss the relationship they do have, just that he doesn’t view Sebek as caring about him as a person rather than him as a prince/mage). How can he, when Sebek constantly acts like a fanboy around him?

Now let’s look at Malleus and Silver.

Silver addresses Malleus as either ‘housewarden’ or ‘master.’ Again, to my previous point about Sebek, I think this does point to Silver and Malleus’ relationship not exactly being a friendship. However, I think differently to Sebek, Silver does have more of a personal relationship with Malleus.

He treats Malleus with respect and formality, but he isn’t over the top with it. I’d argue they have a sort of ‘mentor-student’ relationship in a way; not exactly that, but you understand my point. Silver looks up to Malleus as a person, and Malleus is willing to teach Silver about things. I almost want to say they’re a bit like a younger and older sibling, but I think a bit of the closeness/familiarity is lacking (at least for now). The relationship still has a bit of a formality to it, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t personal. I won’t spoil for those who haven’t read book 7, but I think their relationship becomes more clear there, iykyk.

I know most of Malleus’ vignettes are played for a joke, but holy shit they make me sad. You can tell that ever since he enrolled, if he wasn’t sharing a class with Lilia, Malleus has basically had to work alone for everything. Even here, Cater is only asking Mal if he wants to join his group so he can use Malleus for Magicam clout. Everyone is so scared of him that he’s never had a partner and he’s even gotten used to it. It might not seem that serious, but honestly - sorry to be crude - this kind of thing does fuck you up, especially while growing up.

Think about how Malleus feels - being the outcast and genuinely having no friends feels humiliating and depressing. It makes you think there’s something wrong with you, and that’s the way I choose to interpret the other aspect of his character. His passive acceptance to social isolation and rejection is a constant among his vignettes - anytime someone brings this up, he’ll say it’s fine and he’s used to it.

Another relationship worth noting is Malleus’ grandmother - his only living blood relative. Something that stood out to me (and I could be reading too much into this) but Malleus really feels surprised that his grandmother would take time to write her only family member a happy birthday letter?

That’s very sad to me, and I think it’s a reflection of both the expectation Malleus feels is placed on them as royals and his feeling that he as an individual (not as a prince) is inherently less important than any royals duties. He seems to think this way about himself too, treating his princely duties as always more important than anything he would want personally. A letter is a small gesture, and Malleus doesn’t even expect that from his grandmother.

I’ll use this to segue to discussing Malleus’ insecurity and social isolation.

Ever since he was a child, Malleus has been isolated from others. Before he was feared and before he was worshiped, Malleus was lonely. That’s clear to anyone. Now, I want to talk about how this loneliness and isolation has affected his self-image.

Examining his personal relationships, how the rest of the school sees him, and his own views on royalty and himself, I think it’s clear Malleus, on one regard, seems at first glance to think highly of himself. He isn’t arrogant or boastful. Rather, he just is very extraordinary in many aspects.

But, that surface level interpretation completely leaves out the other side of him. While he might excel in skills, Malleus fails on all regards in terms of relationships. It’s clear, no matter how much he says he doesn’t care or that he’s accepted it, that it hurts Malleus every time he is excluded from something.

He tries to hide that he’s upset that he missed the orientation ceremony, but Lilia remarks that it’s clear how jealous he is that Sebek got to attend. When Lilia reminds him that there’s always next year, Malleus immediately dismisses the possibility that he will ever be invited. In his birthday vignette, he states that he hates eating entire cakes and becomes upset when Yuu brings up the fact that they aren’t meant to be eaten alone because he knows. He knows just how lonely and isolated he is compared to everyone else and he hates.

Malleus has mostly given up and accepted that he will ever fit in. He is pessimistic, but to say he does not hope isn’t entirely correct. Later in the vignette, although he may be half-joking, Malleus remarks that Leona may have stopped by to invite him to a party - he’s even excited by the prospect. And again, he is let down. Leona even taunts him spot-on for his greatest insecurity (isn’t he just so dreamy?).

Now, while this does offend Malleus to a degree (see their catfight where he basically threatens to declaw Leona), I get the feeling that this kind of interaction with someone who views him as an equal (or at least, isn’t intimidated nor awed by him in the slightest) is probably pretty refreshing for Malleus. In a way, you get the sense that he enjoys that back and forth with him, because this goes back to Mal’s wish to be accepted and have friends to talk with.

Anyway, to return to my main point: Malleus’ deep loneliness and failure to fit in has likely caused some deep rooted feelings of insecurity (Note: I want to make a separate post on this because it’s kind of a lot, but I think this also contributes to his anxious attachment style). Malleus likely feels unwanted, despite all the great things about him that make people like Sebek fanboy over him.

No matter how powerful Malleus becomes, no matter how many people worship him, Malleus will always feel worthless deep down because no one will accept him for who he is.

The kind of insecurity and loneliness that pervades your life for years and follows you around everywhere isn’t something you can just shake off. No matter how much he tries to reassure himself that he is enough, he’ll never quite be able to quiet the voice in his head telling him that he is wanted by nobody and that he deserves nothing, that things are this way because he is not worth loving.

To conclude, how can Malleus reconcile these two sides of himself - the parts that know he is something great (worthy of worship and praise, even) and the parts that tell him he is worth nothing? Both sides are so extreme, people worship him but almost everyone avoids him. I feel that’s something Malleus must struggle with a lot - trying to hold on to the view of himself as a good prince while feeling that slip away when he becomes emotional.

Thanks for reading if you got this far! Let me know if you disagree or think I got anything wrong, this is just my thoughts and my opinions and I’m open to changing them :)

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angelthefandomobsessed · 4 months ago

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Through a Gaze So Very Fractured

Diasomnia Fic - A young Silver begins to question his place in the world. Sebek makes things worse, but it's not his fault - he's eight here, he won't get character development for almost a decade. (Lilia's here to win dad of the year, luckily).

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Silver had always hated mirrors. His father had only one mirror, with a cracked surface and a rickety old frame that lurked behind stacks of books. So, while Silver found that he despised the thing, he managed to go through his early years without paying it much mind.

Lilia had never paid it any heed either. It had once been useful for relaying messages, but a mark of a well-lived fae was their desire to live unbothered. Chucking his axe at the centre of the glass had taken better care of his bothersome ex-colleagues than any spell could have. Disposing of it had never crossed Lilia’s mind, so he left it in the corner, where it became a passive observer to their peaceful lives.

Every so often, when the boy was sneezing just a tad too much, he would hand Silver a dustcloth and ask him to clean everything he could reach. Cleaning without magic built character, so he said.

When Silver agreed and went to the mirror, Lilia always failed to notice the way his son fixed his eyes on the wall behind the object as he cleaned it.

It wasn’t until Silver was nine that he became cognizant of his aversion to not just mirrors, but to most reflective surfaces.

It began to bother him in a way that he couldn’t seem to shake off, not even when he was out exploring the woodlands surrounding Lilia’s cottage. While he and Sebek sat, feet dangling in the nearby creek, wooden swords cast aside by the treeline, Silver lowered his voice and asked, “Do all children look like their parents?”

Sebek stared at Silver for a moment, his green eyes narrowed. Being a naturally quiet child, Silver hadn’t minded the silence. He took the time to listen to the birdsong; it was nearing dinner time, and the birds that nested by his bedroom window were chirping to each other, warning of the impending darkness. A warning meant for him too, he understood, in a way that nobody else seemed to.

“Of course children look like their parents. That’s obvious,” Sebek finally replied, voice loud and clear, as though he was the sole authority on the matter.

Silver leaned forward and looked into the creek. His reflection was a slippery thing. Round ears occasionally stretching out, reaching for wherever it was that the water was trying to go.

“I don’t think I look much like father.”

Sebek made a sound - something between a chuckle or a scoff - and shook his head. “You’re right, you look nothing like Sir Vanrouge. How could you? You’re only a human. You have no right to resemble a fae as great as him!”

At that, Silver frowned and turned over Sebek’s words. He was often told not to listen to everything Sebek said - that he was taking after his grandfather in the worst possible ways.

But Silver was a human. That much was true.

“Does that mean that I look like my…” Silver struggled to recall the word. It was one he rarely heard spoken aloud. “My mother?”

Sebek shrugged. “How should I know? You were found in the woods. That’s what my grandfather said. He also said that lesser beasts abandon weak children to the wild and that a noble fae shouldn’t tarnish themselves to pick up after them.”

“He said all that to you?” Silver asked, puzzled by the strange, buzzing feeling unfurling in his stomach.

The other boy seemed to bristle and flush at that. “W-Well, not to me, but I heard him talking to someone about it.” He paused before adding, “It was another adult! From the palace!”

“I see…” Silver said.

While Sebek regaled the tale of the powerful, striking, unmistakably fae guard that had conversed with his grandfather, Silver listened to the birds once more.

Your father and his liege are almost done talking, a bird called down from its branch. Run along now. To higher ground with you.

“-and he must have been a powerful mage too, because-”

“We should go now,” Silver told him, standing up.

“Oi, Silver! I wasn’t done speaking to you!” Sebek scrambled to his feet, nearly falling flat on his face. “Get back here!”

The creek was surrounded by a high lip, taller than both of the boys. Silver didn’t have to think about his movements, though. He climbed the short, jagged rocks with the expertise of a mountain goat. Sebek was far less graceful as he followed Silver, but the two had retrieved their practice swords and were on their way back in no time flat.

“What’s the big rush?” Sebek grumbled.

“Lord Malleus and father are finished talking. They will worry if we aren’t back before dusk,” he replied in his typical, straightforward way of speaking.

The mention of the fae prince, predictably, perked Sebek up. “Why didn’t you just say so? I would have sprinted back if I knew Lord Malleus was waiting! Hurry up, human!”

While Sebek began to run back to the cottage, Silver slowed to a stop. It was that word again. The thing that he was, so unlike everyone else in his life. Sebek’s father was human, but he was fully grown and smart. He had his uses.

But the way Sebek had said it - human - was different from every other time he had heard it. Silver didn’t much like it. He could feel his dislike for the word growing in his stomach, feeding those strange feelings from earlier.

Human.

He didn’t want to be that.

A gentle green light floated past Silver’s peripheral vision. He blinked and looked forward, noticing a trail of green lights weaving leisurely through the trees. Silver followed them without question.

When he arrived at the cottage, an impossibly tall, ethereal figure awaited him. “Silver,” Malleus greeted. “It seems that Sebek is the winner of this race. An unexpected turn of events, I must confess.”

“We weren’t racing,” Silver protested without thinking. “He ran off when I mentioned you were finished speaking with father.”

“Oh?” Malleus smiled in a flash of sharp teeth. “And how did you know that our business was done?”

“The birds told me,” Silver reported before pressing forward. Behind him, Malleus chuckled and caught up to him in a single stride.

“I see,” was all he said.

“Did Sebek run past you?” Silver asked.

“No. I saw him charging out of the trees without you, so I decided to ensure your safe return.”

“I would have made it back by myself,” Silver told him. “Sebek will be disappointed that you walked me back and not him.”

Silver looked up at Malleus and caught him with that face. The one he wore when he didn’t quite understand something - when he was worried about it. Whenever Silver woke up after a sudden bout of exhaustion, both Lilia and Malleus would look at him like that. Silver wasn’t sure how he should feel about it.

“He would be even more disappointed if something had happened to you,” Malleus pointed out.

“Would he be?” Silver wondered aloud.

He regretted his loose tongue when Malleus stopped dead in his tracks.

“Of course he would,” the fae prince said slowly. “What has he said to make you question that?”

Silver felt another twist in his stomach.

“Nothing. I… didn’t mean what I said. Let’s go home,” he said before remembering himself. “Please, Lord Malleus.”

The fae prince regarded him for one painful, seemingly everlasting moment before giving a short nod. “Very well.”

Silver wasn’t sure how he felt about their silent walk back to the cottage. He was glad that the conversation was over. But the silence felt heavier than the pile of firewood his father would hand to him every morning was. He had done something wrong - he just knew it.

So, when they returned and Sebek made a fuss about how strong he was, Silver kept his head down and stood back. He wondered if this is how the forest creatures, always lingering at least an arm’s length away from regular people, saw the world. If it was, how could they stomach it? Silver couldn’t.

Silver gasped when he felt a weight on his shoulder. He turned on his heel and saw his father.

“You are not looking very well,” Lilia observed, features woven with concern. He pressed a cold hand to Silver’s forehead, frown deepening. “You don’t feel feverish… Is your stomac hurting? Did you eat anything raw off the forest floor?”

“N-No father.” Lilia’s brows raised ever so slightly at the stutter. It was rare for Silver to speak without conviction - he was such a serious child.

“I should return to the castle,” Malleus announced. Not even the crown prince himself could break Lilia’s concentration from his son. “Sebek. I will take you home promptly… We would not want to trouble Lilia for dinner, after all.”

At the mention of a meal prepared by Lilia, Sebek’s face managed to pale beyond his typical fair complexion.

“Of course, Lord Malleus! But you have no need to escort me home! I can make the journey by myself.”

The sight of the small, round eared Sebek declaring himself fit to wander through the forest and back to the heart of Briar Valley made Lilia chuckle. “Just accept the privilege,” Lilia urged with a wry smirk. “It is not every day that Malleus makes an offer so generous.”

“Lilia,” warned Malleus, face shifting from serene to something a little more dangerous.

“Yes, yes, I know.” Silver did not know what it was that Lilia knew, but he was discovering that he didn’t know much, so this did not surprise him. “Away with you now. Go on, before your grandmother starts a wildfire with that lightning of hers.”

“Farewell, Lilia.” Malleus’ bright, gem-like eyes glittered toward Silver. “Silver,” he said with a nod. “I hope that you feel well again soon.”

Silver managed a weak smile and bid them, “Safe travels.”

Once they had vanished in a flash of green, Lilia let out a huff. He then advanced faster than Silver could react, hoisting the young boy over his shoulder.

The child let out a cross between a ‘Huh?’, and an indignant, ‘Hey!”

“I am quite positive that there is something wrong with you, and I will find out what it is, young man,” Lilia declared.

“I’m fine!”

“Tell it to your face and to your posture. And to Malleus, for that matter. I could tell he was worried about you the second the two of you walked through the door.” Lilia paused to gently shift and deposit Silver onto his bed. “Please, Silver, tell me what the matter is. I can tell when you’re hiding something.”

Silver bit down on his lip and watched Lilia’s stern, unmoving face. All he could say was, “I’m sorry, father.”

“What for?” pressed Lilia.

“For being weak and human.”

When he said ‘human’, he said it the same way that Sebek had. Like it was something dirty. Something that should never be uttered.

That broke Lilia. Silver saw the immediate shift; the shock that seemed to physically strike Lilia, the way his stance opened and shrank back, the falling of his features. The sight of his father, who always stood strong and cheerful, taken aback by something Silver had said, broke Silver in turn. Silver could not see the ways that it changed himself, though - all he knew was that he was crying.

And that Lilia was holding him before he could let out his first full sob.

“You are not weak,” Lilia insisted. His sonorous voice was so much louder when it was right next to Silver’s head. It was impossible not to hear - impossible not to feel. “You are a human, but that is no fault. That is simply what is.”

Silver couldn’t respond. All he could do was whimper pathetically while he tried to hide his face in the front of his father’s shirt.

“Whatever it was that Sebek said to you - and I have no doubt it was him that started this - it is not the whole truth. Some people have a way of seeing the world that is fractured. A broken perception, so sharp that it can hurt people. I have seen it all across Twisted Wonderland.”

“It wasn’t Sebek’s fault,” Silver weakly insisted. He tried to sniffle discreetly, but only succeeded in drawing the embarrassing sound out further. “I-I know I don’t look like you. I’ve seen it in the sitting room mirror.”

Lilia was quiet for a moment. And for that moment, Silver wondered if he was right all along, and that he was an unworthy son to Lilia. “I suppose that this is my fault, then. I should have spoken to you before this. It’s just…” The fae sighed. “I did not want you to grow up too fast. But it seems you are as wise as you are kind. Two admirable qualities. Fae-like qualities, once upon a time.”

Silver pulled back and rubbed at his eyes, wincing at the tears that wet his hands. “Gross,” he lamented, the seriousness of his face drawing a laugh from Lilia. Once he had wiped down his hands, he asked, “Once upon a time?”

The bat fae readjusted his legs, gave a toothy smile and clasped his hands on his lap. “They say that qualities such as kindness and wisdom were valued by all at one point. And now they say that those qualities are rare… But I disagree. Some people choose to see the world as a dark place, while some choose to see it as a bright and hopeful place.”

“Which of them is right?”

“Neither. The world is what it is. When people - be they fae, human or beastman - start to fracture their way of seeing the world through hatred or ignorance, they stop being able to see it for what it is. The same goes for those that choose to view it through blind faith.”

“And… what is it? The world, I mean,” Silver asked with the same wide, bright eyes that had changed Lilia’s life.

“Only you can decide. If I told you what to see, then you wouldn’t see what is truly there. You would be seeing my perception of it.”

“I see…”

“Precisely!” Lilia ruffled Silver’s hair, pushing it back so that he could get a good look at his eyes. “I used to look at the world through a gaze so very fractured. But when I first laid eyes on you, a mere babe, I felt my viewpoint fixing itself.”

“So you were…” Silver tried to recall the words from earlier. “Ignorant?”

“You always cut right to the heart of the matter… Yes, I was very ignorant. And hateful, too. Humans have caused a great deal of harm to this land.” When Silver’s face fell, Lilia gave him a playful tap of the forehead. “Try not to look so glum, child. When I looked at you, so full of innocence, I realised that you were not responsible for all that had happened before you even graced this soil. And that if I continued to do ignorant, hateful things because of what those before you did, children like you would grow up to be as ignorant and hateful as I was.”

“So you… changed?” Silver asked.

“I did. I took you in not only to teach you the ways of the world, but so that you could teach me too.”

The way that Lilia looked at Silver bordered on reverant, like Silver was a miracle of some sort. It was… reassuring, the boy found.

He gave his father a small, bashful smile. “Am I a good teacher?”

“The best,” Lilia said with a grin. “You, Sebek and Malleus keep me young, you know. I learn so much from all of you.”

“That’s good, father. I feel a lot better now. But I feel so…”

Before he could give his warning, Silver’s eyes grew heavy and he slumped forward. Lilia caught him and laid him down properly. Children really were a whirlwind - even quiet, oddly well-mannered ones like his Silver. Before he left him for the night, he sat at the edge of the bed and watched him. His cheeks were tear-streaked and red, and his nose needed a good wiping, but he seemed at peace now.

Lilia pressed a kiss to Silver’s forehead and fetched a handkerchief to wipe his face with. Though Silver was now dead to the world, Lilia still filled the room with the words, “I love you,” before he left him to sleep.

First things first; that wretched mirror had to go, so it seemed he had a bonfire to build. Sebek would need to be reprimanded for adopting all of Baur’s views, but that would wait until the morrow. For now, Lilia would have some pine needle tea, as well as a flip through that parenting book that Sebek’s father had given him. Though, he had a feeling that there were some problems that no amount of books could prepare him for…

As that feeling passed through him, he realised that the stew he had been preparing was thoroughly burnt. Oh well… At least he knew it was cooked properly! He would treat Silver to it when he woke up.

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I started writing this in January and it's now August. Whoops.

#twisted wonderland #diasomnia #fanfic #fanfiction #malleus draconia #silver #silver twst #silver twisted wonderland #diasomnia family #sebek zigvolt #found family #small child has an identity crisis #lilia vanrouge #silver vanrouge

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