angelasmooore

[angelasmooore]

rereading this again because it’s seriously the hottest thing I’ve ever read

Rafe/Sofia slight au alternative from your other writings where they’ve had sex. Maybe she has a hard time getting an orgasm and needs time to get pampered, and her previous partner did not care to give her any orgasms as he got bored after a few minutes or so, and if it was penetrative, it was done when he was done. So…she can count on one finger how many she’s had. When she tells Rafe this one night….he get’s pissed (at her ex) and decided to fully pamper her and spoil her, giving her several

❝ ravenous, r. cameron. ❞

ooo. 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈… rafe cameron x sofia

ooo. 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔… multiple orgasms, edging, teasing, cunnilingus, fingering, penetrative!sex, unprotected sex, praising, talks of orgasm delay, cuddling, post-coital snuggling, heartwarming, vulgarity, explicit sexual content, overstimulation.

ooo. 𝒔𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔… rafe’s frustrated when he learns that sofia’s ex never gave her an orgasm before.

ooo. 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔… this was another one that’s been in my asks for a long time lol but i finally got around to it. didn’t follow this exactly like you asked but it’s still similar to what you wanted. i kindaaa got carried away 🫣 but i hope you enjoy;)

“wait what?” rafe questioned incredulously caught between bewilderment and frustration; pausing the movement of his hand that was brushing against the curve of her spine. he cranes his head, furrowing his brows as he looked down at her. “so you’re telling me you’ve never had an orgasm before having sex with me?”

sofia shrugs, feeling a blush curl around her neck and color her cheeks. she lowers her eyes; almost abashed and chagrined at her admitted confession. “other than when i gave them to myself? not really,” she reminiscences on her relationship with her ex daniel — and how sex with him never left her fully satiated juxtaposed to how she feels whenever she has sex with rafe.

daniel wasn’t a reciprocal lover like rafe; where daniel vied for his own pleasure without any proper concern of assuring she had the same gratification; rafe always made sure to fill her to repletion — supplying her with at least two orgasms whenever they made love.

(he always sought out for her release first — he loved the way her face contorted in pleasure, how her fingernails bit roughly into his skin, how her swollen lips pleaded his name and her body writhed mercilessly beneath him. but even during those seldom times where he conceded first; he would persevere through his own virility, either finishing her off with his fingers or lapping her with his tongue.

he’s always been a giving lover, never once taking without reciprocating. because he’d be damned if he was deprived of feeling the wanton clench of her pussy gaping and stretching around his cock or hearing the lascivious sounds of their lovemaking ricocheting throughout the room.)

so it truly aghast him that someone would willingly deprive themselves of that same pleasure; that her ex didn’t obtain the same penchant that he did of making her cum when it was undoubtedly one of the best feelings ever. but it wasn’t just about making her cum either. for rafe, it was about the connection and the trust that was shared between them in a vulnerable and intimate moment. it was about making sure she knew that it was about her just as much as it was about him.

“i mean sometimes he tried, but he usually got bored if he didn’t feel me getting aroused or if he finished first.”

rafe shakes his head, feeling his anger accrue. what kind of amateur was daniel to conceded so defeatedly during foreplay? all it took for rafe was for him to press his thumb against the sensitive bud of her clit and sofia’s body would respond immediately with arousal slicking his fingers and her sweet musk invading his nostrils.

he knows that people respond differently to others touch, but it’s the simple fact that daniel didn’t even try to make sex enjoyable for sofia as it was for him that infuriated rafe.

“okay, no offense sof, but that guy was a fuckin’ loser. you guys were together for six months and he didn’t make you cum once?!” she bites on her lower lip, shrugging, bashfully and still shroud in deep chagrin.

rafe takes immediate heed of this and an idea piques his interest. “c’mere baby,” he avers softly, as he maneuvers himself to an upright position to where his back was now leaned against the headboard. sofia’s face furrows in an adorably confused frown as she sits up and perched herself onto his lap. his fingers stretch around her waist as he holds her body against his.

“baby, what’s—?” rafe leans forward and kisses her, swallowing down the remainder of her inquiry. she gasps softly into his mouth at the abruptness of his onslaught but melts into the embrace — reciprocating the softness of fervor that he’s pecking against her lips.

she moans breathily, feeling rafe’s tongue slide against her lips, begging for entrance that she immediately succumbs to. she could already feel her lips swelling from his ravenous kisses. air catches in her lungs, desperately pleading for them to part so she could catch her breath but she ignored the forewarning, continuing to indulge in the greediness of rafe’s lips.

“gonna make you cum,” he murmurs, slacking his jaw as he deepened the kiss. his fingers slide underneath the hem of the oversized t-shirt that she’s wearing and palms against her backside until he reaches her bra. he unhooks it with deft and greedy fingers; feeling the straps loosen around her shoulders and chest. “gonna make up for all the times you had to make yourself cum because of that fuckin’ loser!” he berates through bared teeth, tugging the loosened bra off of her body and absentmindedly tossing it aside somewhere onto their carpeted floor.

he reaches for her shirt, tugging it over her abdomen until she lifts her arms in the air and assists him as he continued to undress her. “rafe.” she keens softly, her body instinctively arching closer into his touch when he brushes his thumb over her flaccid nipple.

he slides his mouth over hers in a bruising kiss as he gently maneuvered her backwards onto the bed. he hovers atop of her, still thumbing against her nipple that becomes easily erect with her growing arousal. he groaned softly, murmuring a low expletive under his breath when he smelled the evidence of her arousal seeping in the air.

“fuck, you smell so good baby. i know you taste even better,” he coos, his warm breath ghosting against her lips.

sofia whimpers, feeling the slick of moisture gather between her legs and messily dampen the gusset of her underwear. she writhes against the mattress, feeling the carnality of her libido spur at his coquettish tease. rafe pries his mouth from hers — their lips retract with a resounding wet ‘pop’ that ricocheted throughout their bedroom as he began kissing down her abdomen.

sofia bites her lip, her pulse hastens with every delicate kiss that he imprints against the satin of her skin. “r-rafe,” she whispers, her breath catching in her throat as desperation claws at her skin. his lips continue their torturous feat until his mouth’s hovering over the waistband of her ruined underwear.

“look at you,” he says; marveling at the sight of her arousal. the dark spot is visible against her pink underwear — soddening through the fabric. “already so wet and ready for me.” he lowered himself between the crux of her legs, puckering his lips as he pampered love bites against the inside of her thighs. sofia’s body arches as she reaches a hand out, her fingers scratch against his scalp as she held a grip on rafe’s head attempting to direct his mouth where she needed him most.

“tell me what you want first. my tongue or my fingers?”

“both!” she huffs impatiently, feeling her vision fog as tears lined in her pupils. “i don’t care — just anything, baby. i need you,” rafe’s cock lurched at her proclamation. his body yearned for her touch too, desperate to be inside of her. but this was about pleasuring her and he had every intention of filling her to repletion to absolve of her ex’s foolish mistakes.

“okay. i got you.” he avows as he thumbs his fingers into the edges of her underwear and began to tug them down her hips. sofia levitates her hips slightly off of the bed, feeling the dexterity of rafe’s finger doff the useless fabric off of her body with the same disregard that he did with her bra and t-shirt.

shel laid there beneath him; bare and beautiful. her body lithe and open completely to him. she always playfully rolled her eyes and insisted against otherwise when he called her perfect — but rafe couldn’t think of another word that held the same weighted meaning that was befitting of her. she is perfect to him — every curve and marking on her body was sculpted to perfection. and he would spend the rest of his life praising his love and admiration of her until she realized it too.

rafe slowly dragged two fingertips through sofia’s wetness. the sudden pressure of being right where she needed him causes sofia to moan again as she arched closer into the sensation. she chases rafe’s fingers, angling her hips in hopes that he will heed the same attentiveness to her clit.

she reaches beside her, gripping the bedsheets between her fingers. a cry rips through her throat when rafe’s fingers find her clit, slowly rubbing against the sensitivity and spreading her wetness. “ay dios mios!” she whimpers, her breathing labors as she feels the pleasure shrouding through every crevice her body.

the delicious stretch of rafe’s fingers curling inside of her breaks the hazy fog clouding in sofia brain, but only brief in its attempts as her arousal addled mind takes over again. there was something about how rafe gently talks her through it, about the squelching noises her cunt makes as he thrusts his fingers into her, that sends her into a frenzy.

he slides his fingers out slowly, then alternates as he hastens the pace, dragging and curling to feel all of sofia around him. and when he hits that spot high along her front wall, sofia’s cunt spasms tightly around his fingers. she groans, her head falls back and her hips chases, guides, angles to encourage rafe’s fingers to find that sweet spot again. every time she thinks she’ll collapse entirely, her hips will thrust and her cunt will slide against rafe’s fingers and she’ll fall helplessly into that cloudy pleasure again.

“i’m close!” she sobs, biting so roughly on her lower lip that she could taste the pungent taste of blood stinting from the bruise. rafe nods, feeling the chasm of her cunt suctioning his fingers.

“i know. cum for me. cum on my fingers,” sofia’s body seizes, her toes curl and back arches. she chokes on something incoherent that’s caught between his name and a loud curse. she moans when her cunt tightens further around his fingers, suctioning them as she takes him even deeper. “yeah. that’s it. just like that, sof.” she cums messily on his fingers, which had began to ache from their curled position. but he disregards that pain as he hollows his cheeks and sucks sofia’s taste off of his fingers. sofia gasps as she falls against the bed, attempting to catch her breath.

she’s dripping a mess on the sheets and between her thighs. perspiration is slick against her flushed skin and her eyes are dazed. the sight of her has rafe salivating. he diverts himself to clean up some of the slick along her thighs. “wanna taste you,” he murmurs, his eyes wander up and meets her bleary gaze.

sofia’s too labored to respond with anything but a whimper. rafe takes that as an incentive to proceed.

he kisses up her body, pressing small kisses against her hipbones before delving into her. he starts of slow and thorough — diligent and precise in his tonguing as he traced along the shape of her and explored every slippery crevice. he sucks her clit into his mouth and hears the high keen of pleasure ringing through his ears as she croons a breathy, “rafe!” into the air.

he presses the flat of his tongue against her clit; feeling a combination of sofia’s wetness and his saliva drip messily down his chin. he teases her lightly with his teeth, nipping softly at the sensitive flesh and then licked his tongue up her vulva again. he’s temporarily deprived of air with how far his nose is pressed into her clit. but he manages for a while, long enough to hear sofia’s moan taper off into a whimper before she breaks for air, gasping and light headed. she grinds against his face, pushing him so deep that he’s suffocated in the swelter of her cunt.

“fuck—rafe—oh my god!” she exclaims, wheezing around a string of curses. rafe works her through it, groaning as the taste of sofia’s second orgasm spills into his mouth. only once her body deflates entirely, with the aftershocks of two orgasms back to back finally fading does he finally withdraw.

he leans up to kiss her, messily intertwining their tongues, allowing the tangy taste of her cum to pass between them. he reaches a hand between them and languidly teases his thumb against her clit again. she whimpers softly against his lips feeling a shiver roll down her spine.

she was wrecked.

she’s cum twice before, but never to this extent and never consecutively like this before. it’s always been in intervals with rafe talking her through every one. now her body felt completely boneless as he exceeded her beyond her boundaries. her breathing was rugged, legs sore, but when she felt the tease of his fingers, her cunt throbbed for more of him despite her body’s languidness.

“you’re wet again.” rafe whispers, feeling her instinctively squeeze around his finger. she nods tersely, biting on his lip when she idly thrusts her hips against the friction. this time his ministrations were deliberately slow, teasing in their feat. he flexes his fingers, stretching her completely open again until her cunt swallows his fingers.

“i love making you cum. love seeing how you take my fingers like this, baby.” he slides against the sensitive flesh hearing her exhale another soft whine. she reaches her hand out, curling her shaky fingers around his wrist — attempting for a moment’s reprieve to but rafe’s reflexes are quicker than hers.

“rafe, i can’t—”

he kisses her pouty lips, “yes you can baby. you’ve been doing so good for me, sof. just one more, okay? i got you.”

she nods tiredly, still chafing against the thickness of his soaked fingers. with the twist of his wrist, rafe sinks his entire finger in, thumbing across her clit. it’s still swollen and sensitive from earlier and easy to locate though sofia is wet enough that it takes rafe a moment to get the angle right so that she receives the full friction that she craves.

rafe withdraws slowly, pushing back in with another finger that slips in just as easily as the first did. he watches as his fingers drench messily every time he retracts from her, at how tight she stretches around him. “you want me to keep using my fingers or do you want to finish with me inside you?” he asks hoarsely.

“you,” she whimpers, her chin trembling as tears fell freely from her eyes. “want you inside of me.”

rafe tugs off his briefs, flinging them aside onto the floor along with the forgotten pile of her clothing. he reaches between his legs and firms a grip on his cock that’s painstakingly erect and aching against his thigh. he grabs ahold of sofia’s calf, gently pulling her closer to him while he slicked his precum around his cock with the other. instead of immediately burying himself in the tightness of her sweltering quim he laps himself around the slickness of her folds.

“you’re so wet for me, baby." he murmurs, feeling her cunt lapping repeatedly over his cock, leaving a residue of her arousal slicking him every time he withdraws. he rubbed his head against her swollen clitoris, through her labia and against her entrance. she draws out another loud moan, her head falls back against the pillow as the friction coils and pulls in her lower abdomen. he watches in awe, mesmerized by the sight of her pussy lips and how they lap against him. “that feel good?” he teases, though feeling his own reserve crumbling with every thrust she laps around him.

“yes!” she nods vigorously, her face slack in pleasure.

“yeah?” he teases his tip more firmly against her clit; holding himself there as he rolled his hips into her, watching how the direct and consistent stimulation filled her with pleasure.

he was unraveling her — pushing her beyond her precipice.

it was overwhelming but also felt too good for her to cease the delicious feeling that he’s providing her with. and she’s so distracted by the pleasure that she doesn’t realize he was slowly burying himself inside of her until he rolls his hips against hers and she feels the delicious of stretch of him stuffing her full of his cock. she gasps, blinking through her tears as a breathy, “oh!” falls off of her lips.

his fingers hold her by the waist as he continues his penetration; his eyes never waver from the concentration as he watched her pussy gape around the shape of his cock. he’s curled so deep into her that she feels him pressed against her sternum. she looks beautiful like this with her flushed skin, tits sitting high on her chest with her nipples erected, cunt glistening and swollen from his intrusion. his cock twitches at the debaunched sight of her.

when he’s seated fully inside of her, he leans forward and catches her mouth in another searing kiss as he allows them both a moment’s adjustment. the first thrust is agonizingly slow, he oscillates his hips and revels at the responsive flutter that she gives.

“you’re perfect, baby.” he murmurs, already delirious when he hasn’t even been inside of her for more than a minute. he brushes his pelvis against hers, grinding the base of his cock against her clit. he shivers when she pistons a full body roll, arching so far against him that her cunt suctions his cock back inside of her without resistance. rafe holds her there, hefting her leg higher over his hip so that angle goes deeper. she whimpers, her hands shaking as they seek purchase on his back. “so fuckin’ perfect.” he says, sliding his tongue against hers as he pulls her in for another kiss.

it’s a catch and release of his cock as he fills and extracts from inside of her slick warmth. every penetration feels deeper and better than the last and she feels so dizzy into it that she can feel herself getting lightheaded.

he feels her squeezing around his cock again; a tell that she was on the edge of her third orgasm. “come on baby… cum again for me. i know you can.” he rolls his hips up into her, repeatedly brushing against her g-spot that makes her croon and nearly melt against the mattress. sofia arches into every penetration that rafe implements, feeling him deep in her bones. their skin is slick with sweat and other fluids and slaps wetly against each others as he hastens his efforts, fucking her hard and deep against the mattress that it squeaks and complains at the exertion. he fucks one deep, lingering stroke into her, feeling sofia’s body tremble beneath him.

her thighs squeeze around the head of his cock as she cums again; releasing an orgasm that felt more visceral than the last two. she’s shivering, her mouth hanging agape, hands still clutching at his shoulders when she finally cums. rafe grunts, continuing to fuck her through the aftershocks milking her boneless as he whispered soft praises into her ear. “fuck, sof. you feel so fuckin’ good, baby. so tight and wet. and you keep cuming for me like a good girl. i knew you could do it, baby. all you needed was a little help, yeah?” she whimpers again, nodding at his soft coos.

his orgasm follows almost immediately after hers, the pleasure licks up his spine and tightens in his balls as the white fluid spills from his cock. he falls against her with a groan, his forehead smoldering as he tucks his face against her shoulder. sofia lays there completely spent and fully satiated than she’s ever felt. she flutters her eyes, still disoriented and boneless from the exertion. when rafe sluggishly alleviates the weight of his body off of her and begins pressing kisses against her skin, she stirs and watched as he found himself buried at the crux of her thighs yet again.

“i know you’re tired but me clean you up then i promise we’re done.” it’s a lewd sight before him; her cunt swollen from his unrelenting onslaught with strings of their bodily fluids slipping down her thighs. he can taste her pleasure as it melts out of her cunt and runs down her thighs into his mouth. he laps up the tanginess, swallowing and cleaning the remnants of their cum.

she shudders when his mouth puckers and suckles at her clit for longer than she can bear, just enough for the stimulation to begin to tip into sharp, overstimulating pain and pleasure, blending together. he continues his ravenous feat — tonguing every inch of her cunt until it finally becomes too much and she has to push his head away to gather her bearings. “you okay?” he asks, crawling up the mattress towards her with his chest heaving.

“that was…” she exhaled a trembling breath, running a hand through her disheveled hair. “i didn’t know i could cum that many times.”

rafe chuckled, sprawling himself down on the bed beside her. “you just needed the right person to show you how you should be treated.” he murmurs, pressing a kiss against her shoulder. his cock and body were sore and he was completely depleted of energy, but every ache that burned in his bones was completely worth it knowing that he gave sofia the satisfaction that she’d been deprived of.

[angelasmooore]

[angelasmooore]

HE’S SEATED AT HIS DESK going over the files for an upcoming case when he hears her footsteps approaching. “hey. you busy?” looking up from the stack of papers that skewed messily across his desk, he sees sofia standing in the doorway of his office –– her expression jovial as she smiled at him with raised brows.

rafe shook his head as he absentmindedly pushed aside the pieces of paper, “uh, no.” he says, allowing his eyes to linger on her when he noticed that she has hiding something behind her back. “sof–”

“hey no peeking! close your eyes!” sofia exclaims, causing rafe to sigh deeply in a playful exaggeration as he complied and squeezed his eyes close. he could hear her heels clinking against the floor as she gaitered further into his office. warmth of her body’s heat transferred onto his as he felt completely enveloped by her presence when she stands next to his desk. his cheeks inadvertently flush at the closeness of her proximity. “okay…now you can open them.”

at her permission, rafe flutters his eyes open and sees her standing beside his desk holding a cream covered chocolate cupcake with rainbow sprinkles decorated across the top. sofia smiles, her eyes crinkling in mirth as she proffered the dessert towards him.

rafe chuckles, reaching out to grab the cupcake from her. “thanks.”

“you didn’t think i’d let you forget did you?” she asks as she hopped up on his desk, scooting herself far back enough so that her legs dangled off the edge. he laughs softly as he shakes his head. though rafe didn’t see the need to commemorate the day, sofia would always surprise him with a cupcake on his birthday –– though as years passed it because less of a surprise and more of a tradition. if it were him, he’d allow the day to go completely un-acknowledged, but sofia always persisted against it despite his nonchalance. he appreciated her gesture though, that she took the time to buy him a cupcake every year and remember the day. it admittedly made the day worth being happy about. “so how does it feel being twenty seven?”

“uh, so far? about the same as it did when i was twenty six.” he answers, pulling back the wrapper just enough for him to take a hefty bite out of the delicious treat.

sofia giggled as she leaned forward and brushed her thumb over his lower lip. “you’ve got frosting everywhere.” rafe feels his pulse quickening at the softness of contact, at how her thumb lingers and her eyes lower to meet his. she smiles again, almost shyly as she wiped her hand on a napkin and shrugged. “no big plans today with uh –– what’s her name again…”

rafe licked his lips, tasting the remnants of the frosting on his tongue. he shakes his head, scoffing softly. “no, she broke up with me about a month ago.” he confesses, though with no actual malice directed at jessica for putting an end to their short lived relationship. he enjoyed her company and she was nice, but other than that he didn’t feel a connection between them. she wanted something more than what he wanted (than what he could give her) and became frustrated with his reluctance.

what she didn’t know was that his reluctance was because of his feelings for sofia. they developed when she first began working here, but became deeper as time passed and their friendship grew. he didn’t tell her about his crush –– she had a boyfriend when she first started working here then solemnly vowed off of relationships and men when they broke up. so rafe remained respectful and kept his feelings discreet, though it became more challenging because it seemed as if she got more beautiful every time that he looked at her.

“oh,” she frowned, reaching her hand down and resting it over his. “i’m sorry.”

“don’t be.” he shrugs again, “it wasn’t serious anyway.”

his eyes wander appreciatively over the sharpness of her clavicle that’s showing from the over the shoulder shirt that she’s wearing, it’s a nude color that compliments her skin perfectly. the skirt she’s wearing is tight –– the fabric stretches around her hips as she sits at the edge of the desk accentuating the lithe curve of her body. she’s leaned forward a little which he enough for him to catch a whiff of her perfume that absolutely captivates his senses.

his eyes then lower to her hand that had yet to release from on top of his. he doesn’t even realize that he’s staring until sofia calls his name in a soft beckon. “you okay?”

“yeah, yeah.” he smiles, feeling it slip at the creases when she finally removes her hand from off of his.

“well, since it looks like you’re going to be spending your birthday here at the office how about i order us some takeout?” she suggests, reaching over rafe’s hand so that she’s grabbing ahold of his office phone.

“oh, no. sof, you don’t have to stay here with me i’ll be fine-”

she rolls her eyes, “you’re not spending your birthday alone, rafe!” she asserts and he doesn’t even rebuttal because truthfully, the idea of being with her sounded much better than being here alone like he initially planned to be.

she was too occupied reciting their order to notice but rafe felt his breath hitch at this proximity change. he wasn’t trying to stare but he could see the expanse of her thighs as the hem of her skirt hiked up in her movements. it’s gone past her knees to where he’s catching a glimpse of her inner thigh.

rafe swallows thickly, feeling his cheeks warming. knowing that he needed to look away before she caught him gawking at her legs, he fleets his gaze upward which isn’t much better because she’s biting on her bottom lip as she listened to the worker talk. her hand that was previously rested on his was now running through her hair. and she looked so fucking sexy that it hurt. when she hangs up the phone she sighs softly then looks down at him.

“it’ll be here in half an hour. i got you the orange chicken and spring rolls.”

“that’s—yeah, that’s cool, thanks. and thanks for staying here me, sof. it means a lot.” he murmurs, watching as the soft smile returned on her lips.

“i’ll always be here for you, rafe. you know that.” silence falls between them and they’re just sitting there exchanging longing glances. his eyes lower to her lips then hurriedly fleet back upward to her eyes almost like he’d been embarrassed for staring. he clears his throat, shifting in his chair so that he’s moved away from her. being this close is just too overwhelming for him.

“did barry and everyone else go home already?” he asks, attempting casual conversation hoping that it would be enough to distract himself for looking at her legs or lips again.

sofia nods, “yep. looks like it’s just you and me.” she says softly. she slides her ass off of his desk then walks around his office searching through his record’s collection. “you remember when we won that castillo case? we spent weeks crammed here in your office going through every piece of evidence that we could. truthfully, i thought we were gonna lose that one. but then you found that witness and it got us that win.” she reminisces as rafe too finds himself recollecting on the memory.

it was a high profile case and the partners were desperately vying for it to wrap up quickly with a win. sofia and rafe were assigned the case together and they spent relentless nights in between both of their offices going through everything trying to prove their client’s innocence. fortunately for them, an unknown witness changed the fate of their case and awarded them a non guilty verdict.

“yeah,” rafe nods, sighing deeply as he leaned back against his chair. “that was a tough one. but we managed. we always do whenever we work together.”

sofia turns and gives him another soft smile before returning her attention back to his collection. her fingers thumb through the records, proceeding onward until one piques her interest. “otis redding.” she reads, pulling the record from the slot.

normally he would’ve berated anyone else for touching his things, especially his records that had a deep sentimental value to him but of course with sofia that rule of reason disappears.

“one of the greats.”

“my dad used to play him all the time growing up. it made me fall in love with his music.” she saunters over to his record player, sliding the record out of the package and setting it onto the platter. sofia sets the tone arm down, eliciting a loud screech that whirs before the soft hums of ottis redding’s harmonies ricocheted throughout the room as the song ‘cigarettes and coffee’ begins to play. she turns back around towards him with a raised brow, “dance with me?”

rafe pauses almost reluctantly. “i’m a shitty dancer—” he says, but sofia disregards his excuse as she raised her brow and tilted her head at him. he scratches a hand against his neck before slowly sauntering to his feet. “fine. but don’t say anything if i accidentally step on your feet.” he forewarns, walking around his desk and approaching her.

a soft smile adorns her face as she rolls her eyes. “whatever. quit complaining and get over here, cameron!” he hithers to her beckon, now standing directly in front of her. she cranes her neck up to meet his eyes as she maneuvers in position to where she’s able to wrap her arms around his neck.

“you’re so unnecessarily tall.” she playfully teases, realizing that even with the heels that she’s wearing she still had to tilt her head up to meet his gaze. he chuckles, stepping closer towards her as his hands brushed over her waist. he holds a steady grip on her, tugging her closer until there’s no space remaining. he hears the soft hitch of her breath at the closeness of proximity.

“being tall has its perks. i don’t have to ask anyone for help to reach something that’s high—”

sofia gapes a playful look of offense as she pushes at his chest. “i asked you for help once, okay!”

“once as an everyday, right?”

“you’re annoying.” he chuckles again as their footsteps fell into a slow tandem. the song’s timbre sets an inadvertent mood of intimacy. from the way they’re standing so close to each other and the glances they’re exchanging –– he wonders if she notices it too. “and a liar. i knew you weren’t a bad dancer!” she condemns, shaking her head at him as her smile widened on her face. she looked so beautiful and the fact that she was looking at him like that only made his feelings grow deeper. “is there anything else about you that you haven’t told me that i should know?”

other than me being helplessly in love with you? no.

“not that i know of, no.”

“uh huh.” she hums softly, almost in disbelief. but she doesn’t prod any further. instead she steps closer to him and rests her head against his chest. and he desperately hopes she doesn’t hear how fast his heart’s beating. “you know when i first started working here, i didn’t think we’d get along. i thought you’d be one of those pretentious assholes.”

“ouch!”

she laughs, shaking her head. “but you proved me wrong. you’re nice and really sweet…” she whispers, lifting her head so their eyes are leveled again. “and you’ve become a really good friend over the years.” he pushes down the disappointment that he feels knowing that he would never be anything more to her. he desperately wished she could see him as he sees her –– that he could have the confidence to tell her how he feels without the fear of ruining their friendship. but he knows that he can’t and that he would have to continue being complacent with what they have right now.

“yeah. you’ve been a good friend to me too, sof.” she nods, still looking at him and holding the weight of his stare. “i-”

“what?” she murmurs, eyes holding a profound hopefulness and anticipation. he shakes his head, reneging as he feels his confidence begin to fade. “rafe.”

“you mean a lot to me and i just—”

“you mean a lot to me too, rafe.”

“—i wish that i could…” he pauses, exhaling a soft breath. “this would be so much easier if it were someone else but it’s you and—” he flushes, finding the irony of the situation. he’s such a big shot lawyer in the courtroom with unprecedented confidence yet here he was stuttering and blushing and afraid to tell the woman that he’s in love with how he feels. “sof��” his words muffle as she stands on the tip of her toes and presses her mouth against his.

he’s caught in surprise, mouth gapes as he gasps against her lips. but then the realization settles that she’s kissing him and suddenly he’s alert and responding immediately as he slides his mouth over hers and mimics the softness of her kisses. he groans softly, reaching a hand down to grab ahold of the back of her neck as he pulled her closer. his body elicits with goosebumps –– at the taste of her lips pressing against his, at the little noises that she makes when he brushes his thumb over her cheek and nudged her closer. at the fact that he was actually kissing her.

it almost seems surreal –– holding and kissing her like this.

it’s only when she pulls away that he’s groaning through swollen lips and fluttering his eyes open to look down at her.

“did you — why’d you do that?” he asks, voice thick and scratchy. heart beating so loud that he could feel it pounding in his ears.

she shrugs, biting on her lip again in that sexy way that makes it impossible for him to think straight. “because i knew that you wouldn’t. i’ve been waiting three years for you to kiss me. it probably would’ve been another three more if i didn’t make the first move.” she teases, causing rafe’s cheeks to deepen in color again.

“i didn’t think you were interested. last i remember you swore off of guys.”

“i did.” she nods, “but i thought i’d make an exception for you…” she murmurs before leaning in to kiss him again.

[angelasmooore]

OHMYGOD?!

Rafe/Sofia slight au alternative from your other writings where they’ve had sex. Maybe she has a hard time getting an orgasm and needs time to get pampered, and her previous partner did not care to give her any orgasms as he got bored after a few minutes or so, and if it was penetrative, it was done when he was done. So…she can count on one finger how many she’s had. When she tells Rafe this one night….he get’s pissed (at her ex) and decided to fully pamper her and spoil her, giving her several

❝ ravenous, r. cameron. ❞

ooo. 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈… rafe cameron x sofia

ooo. 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔… multiple orgasms, edging, teasing, cunnilingus, fingering, penetrative!sex, unprotected sex, praising, talks of orgasm delay, cuddling, post-coital snuggling, heartwarming, vulgarity, explicit sexual content, overstimulation.

ooo. 𝒔𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔… rafe’s frustrated when he learns that sofia’s ex never gave her an orgasm before.

ooo. 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔… this was another one that’s been in my asks for a long time lol but i finally got around to it. didn’t follow this exactly like you asked but it’s still similar to what you wanted. i kindaaa got carried away 🫣 but i hope you enjoy;)

“wait what?” rafe questioned incredulously caught between bewilderment and frustration; pausing the movement of his hand that was brushing against the curve of her spine. he cranes his head, furrowing his brows as he looked down at her. “so you’re telling me you’ve never had an orgasm before having sex with me?”

sofia shrugs, feeling a blush curl around her neck and color her cheeks. she lowers her eyes; almost abashed and chagrined at her admitted confession. “other than when i gave them to myself? not really,” she reminiscences on her relationship with her ex daniel — and how sex with him never left her fully satiated juxtaposed to how she feels whenever she has sex with rafe.

daniel wasn’t a reciprocal lover like rafe; where daniel vied for his own pleasure without any proper concern of assuring she had the same gratification; rafe always made sure to fill her to repletion — supplying her with at least two orgasms whenever they made love.

(he always sought out for her release first — he loved the way her face contorted in pleasure, how her fingernails bit roughly into his skin, how her swollen lips pleaded his name and her body writhed mercilessly beneath him. but even during those seldom times where he conceded first; he would persevere through his own virility, either finishing her off with his fingers or lapping her with his tongue.

he’s always been a giving lover, never once taking without reciprocating. because he’d be damned if he was deprived of feeling the wanton clench of her pussy gaping and stretching around his cock or hearing the lascivious sounds of their lovemaking ricocheting throughout the room.)

so it truly aghast him that someone would willingly deprive themselves of that same pleasure; that her ex didn’t obtain the same penchant that he did of making her cum when it was undoubtedly one of the best feelings ever. but it wasn’t just about making her cum either. for rafe, it was about the connection and the trust that was shared between them in a vulnerable and intimate moment. it was about making sure she knew that it was about her just as much as it was about him.

“i mean sometimes he tried, but he usually got bored if he didn’t feel me getting aroused or if he finished first.”

rafe shakes his head, feeling his anger accrue. what kind of amateur was daniel to conceded so defeatedly during foreplay? all it took for rafe was for him to press his thumb against the sensitive bud of her clit and sofia’s body would respond immediately with arousal slicking his fingers and her sweet musk invading his nostrils.

he knows that people respond differently to others touch, but it’s the simple fact that daniel didn’t even try to make sex enjoyable for sofia as it was for him that infuriated rafe.

“okay, no offense sof, but that guy was a fuckin’ loser. you guys were together for six months and he didn’t make you cum once?!” she bites on her lower lip, shrugging, bashfully and still shroud in deep chagrin.

rafe takes immediate heed of this and an idea piques his interest. “c’mere baby,” he avers softly, as he maneuvers himself to an upright position to where his back was now leaned against the headboard. sofia’s face furrows in an adorably confused frown as she sits up and perched herself onto his lap. his fingers stretch around her waist as he holds her body against his.

“baby, what’s—?” rafe leans forward and kisses her, swallowing down the remainder of her inquiry. she gasps softly into his mouth at the abruptness of his onslaught but melts into the embrace — reciprocating the softness of fervor that he’s pecking against her lips.

she moans breathily, feeling rafe’s tongue slide against her lips, begging for entrance that she immediately succumbs to. she could already feel her lips swelling from his ravenous kisses. air catches in her lungs, desperately pleading for them to part so she could catch her breath but she ignored the forewarning, continuing to indulge in the greediness of rafe’s lips.

“gonna make you cum,” he murmurs, slacking his jaw as he deepened the kiss. his fingers slide underneath the hem of the oversized t-shirt that she’s wearing and palms against her backside until he reaches her bra. he unhooks it with deft and greedy fingers; feeling the straps loosen around her shoulders and chest. “gonna make up for all the times you had to make yourself cum because of that fuckin’ loser!” he berates through bared teeth, tugging the loosened bra off of her body and absentmindedly tossing it aside somewhere onto their carpeted floor.

he reaches for her shirt, tugging it over her abdomen until she lifts her arms in the air and assists him as he continued to undress her. “rafe.” she keens softly, her body instinctively arching closer into his touch when he brushes his thumb over her flaccid nipple.

he slides his mouth over hers in a bruising kiss as he gently maneuvered her backwards onto the bed. he hovers atop of her, still thumbing against her nipple that becomes easily erect with her growing arousal. he groaned softly, murmuring a low expletive under his breath when he smelled the evidence of her arousal seeping in the air.

“fuck, you smell so good baby. i know you taste even better,” he coos, his warm breath ghosting against her lips.

sofia whimpers, feeling the slick of moisture gather between her legs and messily dampen the gusset of her underwear. she writhes against the mattress, feeling the carnality of her libido spur at his coquettish tease. rafe pries his mouth from hers — their lips retract with a resounding wet ‘pop’ that ricocheted throughout their bedroom as he began kissing down her abdomen.

sofia bites her lip, her pulse hastens with every delicate kiss that he imprints against the satin of her skin. “r-rafe,” she whispers, her breath catching in her throat as desperation claws at her skin. his lips continue their torturous feat until his mouth’s hovering over the waistband of her ruined underwear.

“look at you,” he says; marveling at the sight of her arousal. the dark spot is visible against her pink underwear — soddening through the fabric. “already so wet and ready for me.” he lowered himself between the crux of her legs, puckering his lips as he pampered love bites against the inside of her thighs. sofia’s body arches as she reaches a hand out, her fingers scratch against his scalp as she held a grip on rafe’s head attempting to direct his mouth where she needed him most.

“tell me what you want first. my tongue or my fingers?”

“both!” she huffs impatiently, feeling her vision fog as tears lined in her pupils. “i don’t care — just anything, baby. i need you,” rafe’s cock lurched at her proclamation. his body yearned for her touch too, desperate to be inside of her. but this was about pleasuring her and he had every intention of filling her to repletion to absolve of her ex’s foolish mistakes.

“okay. i got you.” he avows as he thumbs his fingers into the edges of her underwear and began to tug them down her hips. sofia levitates her hips slightly off of the bed, feeling the dexterity of rafe’s finger doff the useless fabric off of her body with the same disregard that he did with her bra and t-shirt.

shel laid there beneath him; bare and beautiful. her body lithe and open completely to him. she always playfully rolled her eyes and insisted against otherwise when he called her perfect — but rafe couldn’t think of another word that held the same weighted meaning that was befitting of her. she is perfect to him — every curve and marking on her body was sculpted to perfection. and he would spend the rest of his life praising his love and admiration of her until she realized it too.

rafe slowly dragged two fingertips through sofia’s wetness. the sudden pressure of being right where she needed him causes sofia to moan again as she arched closer into the sensation. she chases rafe’s fingers, angling her hips in hopes that he will heed the same attentiveness to her clit.

she reaches beside her, gripping the bedsheets between her fingers. a cry rips through her throat when rafe’s fingers find her clit, slowly rubbing against the sensitivity and spreading her wetness. “ay dios mios!” she whimpers, her breathing labors as she feels the pleasure shrouding through every crevice her body.

the delicious stretch of rafe’s fingers curling inside of her breaks the hazy fog clouding in sofia brain, but only brief in its attempts as her arousal addled mind takes over again. there was something about how rafe gently talks her through it, about the squelching noises her cunt makes as he thrusts his fingers into her, that sends her into a frenzy.

he slides his fingers out slowly, then alternates as he hastens the pace, dragging and curling to feel all of sofia around him. and when he hits that spot high along her front wall, sofia’s cunt spasms tightly around his fingers. she groans, her head falls back and her hips chases, guides, angles to encourage rafe’s fingers to find that sweet spot again. every time she thinks she’ll collapse entirely, her hips will thrust and her cunt will slide against rafe’s fingers and she’ll fall helplessly into that cloudy pleasure again.

“i’m close!” she sobs, biting so roughly on her lower lip that she could taste the pungent taste of blood stinting from the bruise. rafe nods, feeling the chasm of her cunt suctioning his fingers.

“i know. cum for me. cum on my fingers,” sofia’s body seizes, her toes curl and back arches. she chokes on something incoherent that’s caught between his name and a loud curse. she moans when her cunt tightens further around his fingers, suctioning them as she takes him even deeper. “yeah. that’s it. just like that, sof.” she cums messily on his fingers, which had began to ache from their curled position. but he disregards that pain as he hollows his cheeks and sucks sofia’s taste off of his fingers. sofia gasps as she falls against the bed, attempting to catch her breath.

she’s dripping a mess on the sheets and between her thighs. perspiration is slick against her flushed skin and her eyes are dazed. the sight of her has rafe salivating. he diverts himself to clean up some of the slick along her thighs. “wanna taste you,” he murmurs, his eyes wander up and meets her bleary gaze.

sofia’s too labored to respond with anything but a whimper. rafe takes that as an incentive to proceed.

he kisses up her body, pressing small kisses against her hipbones before delving into her. he starts of slow and thorough — diligent and precise in his tonguing as he traced along the shape of her and explored every slippery crevice. he sucks her clit into his mouth and hears the high keen of pleasure ringing through his ears as she croons a breathy, “rafe!” into the air.

he presses the flat of his tongue against her clit; feeling a combination of sofia’s wetness and his saliva drip messily down his chin. he teases her lightly with his teeth, nipping softly at the sensitive flesh and then licked his tongue up her vulva again. he’s temporarily deprived of air with how far his nose is pressed into her clit. but he manages for a while, long enough to hear sofia’s moan taper off into a whimper before she breaks for air, gasping and light headed. she grinds against his face, pushing him so deep that he’s suffocated in the swelter of her cunt.

“fuck—rafe—oh my god!” she exclaims, wheezing around a string of curses. rafe works her through it, groaning as the taste of sofia’s second orgasm spills into his mouth. only once her body deflates entirely, with the aftershocks of two orgasms back to back finally fading does he finally withdraw.

he leans up to kiss her, messily intertwining their tongues, allowing the tangy taste of her cum to pass between them. he reaches a hand between them and languidly teases his thumb against her clit again. she whimpers softly against his lips feeling a shiver roll down her spine.

she was wrecked.

she’s cum twice before, but never to this extent and never consecutively like this before. it’s always been in intervals with rafe talking her through every one. now her body felt completely boneless as he exceeded her beyond her boundaries. her breathing was rugged, legs sore, but when she felt the tease of his fingers, her cunt throbbed for more of him despite her body’s languidness.

“you’re wet again.” rafe whispers, feeling her instinctively squeeze around his finger. she nods tersely, biting on his lip when she idly thrusts her hips against the friction. this time his ministrations were deliberately slow, teasing in their feat. he flexes his fingers, stretching her completely open again until her cunt swallows his fingers.

“i love making you cum. love seeing how you take my fingers like this, baby.” he slides against the sensitive flesh hearing her exhale another soft whine. she reaches her hand out, curling her shaky fingers around his wrist — attempting for a moment’s reprieve to but rafe’s reflexes are quicker than hers.

“rafe, i can’t—”

he kisses her pouty lips, “yes you can baby. you’ve been doing so good for me, sof. just one more, okay? i got you.”

she nods tiredly, still chafing against the thickness of his soaked fingers. with the twist of his wrist, rafe sinks his entire finger in, thumbing across her clit. it’s still swollen and sensitive from earlier and easy to locate though sofia is wet enough that it takes rafe a moment to get the angle right so that she receives the full friction that she craves.

rafe withdraws slowly, pushing back in with another finger that slips in just as easily as the first did. he watches as his fingers drench messily every time he retracts from her, at how tight she stretches around him. “you want me to keep using my fingers or do you want to finish with me inside you?” he asks hoarsely.

“you,” she whimpers, her chin trembling as tears fell freely from her eyes. “want you inside of me.”

rafe tugs off his briefs, flinging them aside onto the floor along with the forgotten pile of her clothing. he reaches between his legs and firms a grip on his cock that’s painstakingly erect and aching against his thigh. he grabs ahold of sofia’s calf, gently pulling her closer to him while he slicked his precum around his cock with the other. instead of immediately burying himself in the tightness of her sweltering quim he laps himself around the slickness of her folds.

“you’re so wet for me, baby." he murmurs, feeling her cunt lapping repeatedly over his cock, leaving a residue of her arousal slicking him every time he withdraws. he rubbed his head against her swollen clitoris, through her labia and against her entrance. she draws out another loud moan, her head falls back against the pillow as the friction coils and pulls in her lower abdomen. he watches in awe, mesmerized by the sight of her pussy lips and how they lap against him. “that feel good?” he teases, though feeling his own reserve crumbling with every thrust she laps around him.

“yes!” she nods vigorously, her face slack in pleasure.

“yeah?” he teases his tip more firmly against her clit; holding himself there as he rolled his hips into her, watching how the direct and consistent stimulation filled her with pleasure.

he was unraveling her — pushing her beyond her precipice.

it was overwhelming but also felt too good for her to cease the delicious feeling that he’s providing her with. and she’s so distracted by the pleasure that she doesn’t realize he was slowly burying himself inside of her until he rolls his hips against hers and she feels the delicious of stretch of him stuffing her full of his cock. she gasps, blinking through her tears as a breathy, “oh!” falls off of her lips.

his fingers hold her by the waist as he continues his penetration; his eyes never waver from the concentration as he watched her pussy gape around the shape of his cock. he’s curled so deep into her that she feels him pressed against her sternum. she looks beautiful like this with her flushed skin, tits sitting high on her chest with her nipples erected, cunt glistening and swollen from his intrusion. his cock twitches at the debaunched sight of her.

when he’s seated fully inside of her, he leans forward and catches her mouth in another searing kiss as he allows them both a moment’s adjustment. the first thrust is agonizingly slow, he oscillates his hips and revels at the responsive flutter that she gives.

“you’re perfect, baby.” he murmurs, already delirious when he hasn’t even been inside of her for more than a minute. he brushes his pelvis against hers, grinding the base of his cock against her clit. he shivers when she pistons a full body roll, arching so far against him that her cunt suctions his cock back inside of her without resistance. rafe holds her there, hefting her leg higher over his hip so that angle goes deeper. she whimpers, her hands shaking as they seek purchase on his back. “so fuckin’ perfect.” he says, sliding his tongue against hers as he pulls her in for another kiss.

it’s a catch and release of his cock as he fills and extracts from inside of her slick warmth. every penetration feels deeper and better than the last and she feels so dizzy into it that she can feel herself getting lightheaded.

he feels her squeezing around his cock again; a tell that she was on the edge of her third orgasm. “come on baby… cum again for me. i know you can.” he rolls his hips up into her, repeatedly brushing against her g-spot that makes her croon and nearly melt against the mattress. sofia arches into every penetration that rafe implements, feeling him deep in her bones. their skin is slick with sweat and other fluids and slaps wetly against each others as he hastens his efforts, fucking her hard and deep against the mattress that it squeaks and complains at the exertion. he fucks one deep, lingering stroke into her, feeling sofia’s body tremble beneath him.

her thighs squeeze around the head of his cock as she cums again; releasing an orgasm that felt more visceral than the last two. she’s shivering, her mouth hanging agape, hands still clutching at his shoulders when she finally cums. rafe grunts, continuing to fuck her through the aftershocks milking her boneless as he whispered soft praises into her ear. “fuck, sof. you feel so fuckin’ good, baby. so tight and wet. and you keep cuming for me like a good girl. i knew you could do it, baby. all you needed was a little help, yeah?” she whimpers again, nodding at his soft coos.

his orgasm follows almost immediately after hers, the pleasure licks up his spine and tightens in his balls as the white fluid spills from his cock. he falls against her with a groan, his forehead smoldering as he tucks his face against her shoulder. sofia lays there completely spent and fully satiated than she’s ever felt. she flutters her eyes, still disoriented and boneless from the exertion. when rafe sluggishly alleviates the weight of his body off of her and begins pressing kisses against her skin, she stirs and watched as he found himself buried at the crux of her thighs yet again.

“i know you’re tired but me clean you up then i promise we’re done.” it’s a lewd sight before him; her cunt swollen from his unrelenting onslaught with strings of their bodily fluids slipping down her thighs. he can taste her pleasure as it melts out of her cunt and runs down her thighs into his mouth. he laps up the tanginess, swallowing and cleaning the remnants of their cum.

she shudders when his mouth puckers and suckles at her clit for longer than she can bear, just enough for the stimulation to begin to tip into sharp, overstimulating pain and pleasure, blending together. he continues his ravenous feat — tonguing every inch of her cunt until it finally becomes too much and she has to push his head away to gather her bearings. “you okay?” he asks, crawling up the mattress towards her with his chest heaving.

“that was…” she exhaled a trembling breath, running a hand through her disheveled hair. “i didn’t know i could cum that many times.”

rafe chuckled, sprawling himself down on the bed beside her. “you just needed the right person to show you how you should be treated.” he murmurs, pressing a kiss against her shoulder. his cock and body were sore and he was completely depleted of energy, but every ache that burned in his bones was completely worth it knowing that he gave sofia the satisfaction that she’d been deprived of.

[angelasmooore]

read this again and yeah 🤭

AQUAMARINE: A RAFE X SOFIA FANFICTION: CHAPTER THREE, PART TWO

Very important: (Please please take note of this warning, if you don't like smut, please skip this chapter)

Content Warning: 18+, Sexual Content, Smut. Please read at your own discretion.

Radio for the chapter:

SOFIA'S POV:

I can feel blood rushing from the axis of my head to the edge of my lips to the curling neurons in my toes. Reality melted away into vapour and breathed into wisps of air between our kisses. All I could feel was Rafe; his insatiable lips and, his calloused fingertips softly plunging into my skin. We both were rooted to our haven; on the corner of the fireplace but our hands were skirting all over our bodies; searching for an oasis to quench our parched desires. Desires that can only be satiated by indenting my skin onto his and fitting into each other like two mismatched yet perfect pieces of a puzzle. 

His hands, like velvet slipping onto my skin, glided all over my body as he sweetly suffocated me with his kisses. I couldn’t help it, I was a women addicted; my tongue exploring the edges of his mouth and his plunging into mine. His fingers were delicate as it traced along my body; goosebumps and a stir of arousal blooming between my thighs. I think I moaned for the first time in her life when his hands slowly feathered over her back, teetering towards the flimsy strap of my soaked bikini, my breasts peeking from the wet material. I let out a sigh as he stopped his shower of kisses on me as his bewitching eyes silently begged me to let him take my top off; I was ready to give it all at that moment if he asked me to. His assault on my lips and my whole being continued as he resumed kissing me senseless, while his hands violently ripped off the thin straps of my wet bikini. I couldn’t help but moan again inside his mouth as I heard the final straws of my conscience as well as my red top got torn into shreds. 

I lost my religion  as Rafe’s lips followed the line along the middle of my lips to my neck, smothering me with his kisses and then along the valley of my breasts, his head nestling in them as his hands slipped into my pathetic excuse of bikini bottoms. I can feel the blood pumping along with my toes curling as his long fingers slowly massaged and pinched my clit alternatively, my quim getting wetter and wetter every millisecond his hands and mouth were capturing my body. 

I hope to God that no one else can hear me screaming in untamed pleasure, “Ahh! Ahh. Rafe, Dios Mio, Ahh!”

He abruptly stopped his kisses on my chest as he looked up, those cerulean eyes now turning stormy blue. 

“You okay with this?” he whispered, his cherry red, bitten lips parting to catch air. 

Words lost it’s phonetics and meaning as all I could was just nod at him. He crept up to my lips again, crashing his mouth on mine as his middle fingers plunged into my wetness; instantly moaning into each other's mouths. One fingers turned to two; one kiss on the mouth turned to hundred more on the mounds of my tits, repeatedly sucking my nipples and my legs started to give out with the amount of lust my body was receiving and giving to him. My clit and my mound was aching as his fingers kept pinching and moving inside me, I felt a ball of pleasure slowly but surely unraveling out of my body, my moans going more frantic and unintelligible. My hands held tight to his face, the feel of his buzzcut on my digits further making my pussy quiver. 

“Ahh! Rafe, no te detengas, Don’t stop…Uh, I’m gonna….”

“Yea baby, it’s okay, cum on my fingers,” his fingers started to slid in and out faster, his lips suckling and biting both of my breasts. With all the stimulation, my legs started to give out, visibly shaking as I reached the peak of my first ever orgasm. Thank God for the wall supporting my back or I would have fallen on the floor. 

Rafe stopped his ministrations as he looked at me losing myself in lust, eyes closed and mouth parted; the weight of the orgasm still kicking in. His spit smitten lips planted another small kiss on my cheeks and the corner of my mouth,

“Sof, you feel good. God, that was so fucking hot”

Our breaths came in quick, rapid succession; feeling the weight of what just happened now. I thought that it was the most erotic thing I have ever experienced. That thought got quickly suspended as Rafe slowly pulled out his fingers from my soaked pussy and placed his fingers near my mouth. I must have been in a sleepless, hazy trance as I opened my mouth with no caution and tasted myself on his fingers. Rafe softly moaned as I sucked his digits clean; lost in our own pleasures.

At one point, we both couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted, no, unquestionably needed him, his chiseled body to play with me, worship me, break and make me at the same time. I craved to feel his skin on me as I cried out in pleasure. And I think Rafe caught onto it as he picked me up for the second time that night, his fingers begrudgingly leaving my lips as his thighs grabbed the flesh of my thighs and hiked me up in his strong arms. The distance to the bed was miniscule but I didn’t care, I nestled myself onto his neck, inhaling his perfume and musk and kissing his nape as he threw me softly on his California King sized bed. 

I fell unceremoniously on the silky sheets, letting a whine of dismissal. I missed his blazing touch and kisses, even if it was for a second. But my lover quelled my worries as he joined me, his sinewed body caging into mine, nearly making me invisible in his big, strong arms. 

For a flash, I was calculating the aftermath of my actions, never in my life, I have done anything like this before. All I know is his name and that he kisses like how love letters from estranged lovers felt like and that he gives and takes, takes love and lust like he has nothing else to lose. 

And maybe I have lost too much, but I do have some things left to lose. Virginity is a social construct, I know but I know that after this night, I may discover a side of me that I have never even met before and that scares me. 

However, with the way Rafe’s mouth slot on mine perfectly like it was destiny, I threw my last ounce of caution onto the wind. I never knew that I was this desperate for sex. But this perfect stranger, this amorous, man with way too much reputation and secrets on his sleeve is all I ever need for now, at this beating moment. 

I started to paw the hem of his shirt, my eyes wanting to feast on his delicious figure. With no hesitation, he took off his polo in a swift motion. Drool and another wave of desire pooled in my mouth as I hesitantly touched his chest and his abs, the taut yet smooth skin causing me to whimper. His abs flexed as my fingers feathered over his V-line, the small hairs trailing up to his clothed length.  

His lips got to work again as he kissed me ardently; Rafe slithering like paint on canvas as he trailed his kisses from my mouth, to my neck; giving small pecks to my bitten lips, to my top of my chest right above my hungry breasts. His eyes flit to mine in a silent prayer as he put an end to my frustration as he slapped my tits, my senses overstimulated to the brim that only Rafe can satisfy to make it go away. Smacking the globes of my tits, his lips were relentless in his loving, as he alternatively sucked and licked my left breast while his hands massaged the other one. I dug my fingers on to his head as I kept whimpering, 

“Uh! Uh!”

After torturously painting my chest with his kisses, his lips trailed further south, fleeting small smooch to my hips as he lowered himself near my mound. His eyes never left mine as his calloused hands touched my thighs, and without any inhibition but only unadulterated lust and feeling of sex on my mind, I parted my thighs for him. I don’t know what came over me; I felt shy, anxious that I am going to share my body with a man but at the same time I was too drunk in lust. I was on the edge of raw carnal desires possessing my body and when Rafe’s voiced dropped to a low vibrato, I gave in to my deepest desires of being utterly consumed by someone else sensually. 

To be simply put, I want Rafe to fuck me. I want him to pour all of his frustrations and lust on me. 

He parted his lips in awe as he stared at my pussy, mound hairs and all, he didn’t waste any time as his lips attacked my wanton quim and suctioned my clit. I screamed as I felt the newly familiar feeling of my orgasm unwinding from its tight confines; my spine arching like a pantheress on heat. He didn’t stop his carnage as he kissed and suckled on my clit and pussy like a man parched on a desert. But he slid his tongue in my weeping hole and licked my slit, I died of pleasure from my second orgasm. I came violently, thrashing onto his body and gripping his face to make him stay there like a vice while he thrusted his hips on the bed sheets. He groaned loudly as he kept plunging his fingers in my lips while giving small eskimo kisses and saying, “Good girl, you came so hard. Your pussy is so fucking tight and cute, I want to destroy it”

My speaking abilities got reduced to moans as I blabbered, “Rafe, I can’t, please…please…”

“Please what, princess? You want me to do what?” he taunted as he slapped my clit, eliciting a kitten-like whine from me. 

Mother fucker. 

“Ah! Ah! Don’t make…don’t make me say it, Rafe” 

He smirked devilishly, slapping my clit again, “Want me to fuck you, Sofia? You wanna fuck me, Sofia?”

I nodded my head vigorously as I whined, “Por favor, please Rafe, I can’t….I can’t take it anymore”

He crept up to my eyeline now, his hands slowly peeling off his Calvin Kleins as he kissed me again, each kiss making a loud SMACK sound. 

“I know, I know, baby. I know your poor pussy has never taken a dick before. Well, Rafe’s going to take care of you sweet girl. God, you look so fucking hot naked”

We both were bare now, naked and pulsing with anticipation. My eyes bulged as I saw his length bobbing as he took off his boxers; the girth of it making me close my legs for a second. 

Oh my god, the girls were right. He has a big dick. 

But my body betrayed me as wetness started to pool in my clit, his thick shaft making me physically heave, my nipples pebbling in lust. 

He was quick to stop my worries as he noticed my mixed disposition, “What happened? You ok, Sof?”

“Yea…” I gulped in a breath as I stammered, “is your….going to fit in my….”

“What? You think my dick won’t go into your pussy?”

“Huh.” 

His smile was cocky yet soft as he smothered his face in my neck, his thighs parting mine and his hands pumping his hard length, 

“Well, I’m making it fit”

He left his station from my neck, eyes boring into mine and his cock rubbed my clit repeatedly, just lightly touching my soaked mound, my hands going up to his sculpted back, digging my fingers into his skin in unexplainable pleasure. He whispered, “lemme know if it hurts ok, I’m going to go slow, ok”

Again, like a dumb animal, I just nodded, but a silver of fear that the sex will be excruciating, however, amidst the lust filled haze and smell of sex sizzling in the room, I felt his rough hands grab mine delicately near my head, fingers interlocking with mine. In between the wild tug of war between our bodies, a minute but an everlasting feeling of affection washed over me. Out of all the primal kisses and touches, his hand encasing mine felt the most intimate of them. I felt a blanket of unquestionable passion weave through me and him, his amorous eyes and his fingers rubbing soothing circles on my skin channeling his newfound yearning for me. His eyes spoke, “It’s ok, I’ll take care of you”

After a really long time, with no clothes or makeup to mask my scars, both inside and out; I felt adored. Even if he was a stranger, I was cherished. And it feels really freeing to finally see someone look at my body not with disgust; not as piece in their own game but as a woman. 

My other hand cradled his cheek; I was going through so many emotions all at once. Rafe’s eyes closed for a minute as he savoured my touch and tightened his hold on my hand, 

“You good? I’m not going to hurt you Sofia, but we’ll do it only if you want to….I know we just met…”

“I’m a virgin…” His now ink blue eyes were anxious now but again I pasted an innocent kiss on his cheek as I murmured, “But I trust you, just be slow, ok”

“Yea, don’t worry baby. I’ll make you feel good, I promise.”

His towering figure went over my head near the bedside table and hastily opened the drawer and fished out a plastic yet shiny cover, the blue cover with the circular indentation sedimenting my deepest daydream into reality. His hands were shaking as he tore the condom cover open and untwined the rubber but my arms grabbed his and I took the condom from him, silently slithered to his shaft. As my fingers delicately palmed his cock, Rafe hissed in pleasure. It made me feel wet too; with my newfound courage, I starteed to glide my nimble fingers up and down his cock, his abs visibly lifting as I felt pre-cum leaking out of his dick. I closed my eyes in pure lust as I gave him a handjob, the veiny, hard member driving me to the brink of a galaxy of erotic sensations. 

“Stop, Sof…it feels so good…but you…you gotta stop…otherwise…I’m gonna cum…and I really wanna cum in you” Reluctantly I sheathed his length with the condom, his cock slapping his thighs. As my hands stopped my ministrations, Rafe positioned himself between my thighs, he delicately touched them, his touch soft as a feather.  Deliciously his veiny, huge cock slipped into my folds, my wetness feeling an immediate latent pain as he entered me. My thighs felt stretched out and I gasped at the feeling of the unrecognizable intrusion. I grasped his hand tightly, hoping that the pain will fade into unspeakable pleasure. Rafe caught on to my discomfort and started to lift his hips from my slit. 

“Sof, I know, I know…it hurts…I’m sorry. Do you want me to stop?”

“NO! It’s okay…just please don’t stop” my other hand grasped the muscles on his back, my thumbs feeling the sharp planes and ridges of his spine and shoulders. 

He continued to slowly life his hips back and forth, his length sensually disappearing into my hole. I let out a loud scream as his tip hit my pussy and deliberately he rocked back and forth. He groaned as he tried to stuff his dick into my folds, the sound of his moans getting louder as he inched into my pussy little by little. We both were kissing wherever our eyes can see, trying to close the infinitesimally miniscule space between us.  I couldn’t stop moaning and whimpering and my pain was morphing into a heady mix of pleasure and a sharp twinge of mellowed out ache in my slit. I unhooked my hand from his and now both of my arms went up to his shoulder blades as his length hit my cervix.

“You’re so big, I…I feel it everywhere…”

I looked upto his face, beaded with drops of sweat as he grit his teeth as if he was in agony as he said, “Yea, your pussy feels so fucking tight…it’s taking me right in…the cutest pussy ever” 

I couldn’t stop blushing as he just stuffed his dick in my pussy for a couple of seconds, hoping to erase the pain, but fuck, I want him to move. Notwithstanding the anticipation, my hands brushed through the expanse of his back and grabbed the flesh of his butt and pushed it further inside me. I purred near his ear

“Rafe…I can’t take it anymore…please move and take me…”

I never thought I harboured a fiend inside me. Sofia a week ago would have screamed and thrown up if she knew she was going to get the best sex of her life

His groan was feral as he pistoned into me with more force, my wanton, weepy folds throbbing as his hands went up to the headboard and started to move animalistically inside and out of my pussy. The rigid bed started to shake just a tad bit as he decimated my sex, his mouth feasting on my tits again. Both of us gaped at where our bodies met, an familiar coil of arousal forming inside me. He pounded into my slick folds with all his virility, my legs and pussy quivering and spasming as I breathed hard, trying to gulp air to register the overflow of lust flowing throughout my being. 

“Mas, mi bebe. Te sientes tan jodidamente bien, mi carino. Estoy tan cerca, no dejes de follarme.”  

His thrusts became animalistic after I uttered those words, his fingers creeping between our synchronised bodies and pinched my clit and slithered inside my wanton slit, my flesh levitating in an out of body feeling. All I can hear was our mewls, our bodies thawking and the bed creaking boomingly across the room. The coil of pleasure was seconds away to unwind, and when he pistoned one powerful thrust, I unwinded; the climax hitting me in full force. My eyes were blessed with white spots all over my vision and my soul felt euphoric as I felt ropes of my climax oozing out of me. Rafe didn’t stop his fucking me, his thick length slowly pumping in and out with his rosy lips shaping into an “O.” He must be close too. 

Rafe’s hid his face into my neck, nearly tearing up as I heard his muffled yet loud groan as he reached his peak too, cum filling up his condom. We both stilled for a moment, my arms finding its home on his shoulder blades and his neck cradling my face as he buried his face inside my nape. My fingers slowly scraped through the small hairs of his buzzcut as I kept kissing his cheek while he was smacking my neck with ardour, his hands buried in my hair. I moaned in displeasure as Rafe slowly started to pull out of my sopping folds, my body already missing his closeness to mine. 

He fell on the bed next to me, taking off his condom and gazed at my leaking mound. He was a ravaged man as he snaked his way back to my legs, licking our remnants of our sex clean. I caged his head with my thighs, not wanting Rafe’s unconditional loving on me to end. I was spent yet the pleasure was uncontrollable, the whimpers being endless. After slurping my clit clean, he crawled back to me and kissed me on the mouth. I felt my legs shaking again with the weight of his lips and the taste of our sex on me. 

After an unhurried session of our lips dancing with each other, Rafe delicately took the comforter and swaddled it on my body, his nose touched mine as he sweetly said, 

“Gimme a min, I’ll clean you up.” 

He got off the bed and ambled to the washroom, his nakedness colouring my cheeks and my body. In a few minutes, he came back with a wet towel and a box of tissues on his hands. Rafe’s lips twitched to a lazy smile as he looked at me bunching the blanket near my breasts and peach hued cheeks. 

“You getting shy on me baby, I just pounded into you and now you blushing”

Fuck, he’s smooth. I just giggled at his comment with more heat blooming on my cheeks and beckoned him towards me. Rafe crawled upto me, slowly peeling off the comforter off of me. My heart was blushing as he drabbled the wet towel over my mound, eyes focused on dabbing the cloth delicately over my cunt. He tucked on the sheets back again as he threw the cloth over the sofa near the bed.

Rafe lied next to me, his hands grabbing my waist, making me face his body. Within a minute, our hands were all over each other, our bodies just a mesh of limbs intricately tangled with each other. 

“I hope I didn’t hurt you, Sofia,”

“No…fuck…it was everything…you didnt hurt me at all…” I mumbled with a yawn. 

“Sleepy?”

“Yea, you wound me down so bad, Rafe”

“It’s ok, stay the night,” 

My eyebrows raised in astonishment, “You…want me to…stay the night? You sure you’re ok with that”

He laughed as he said, “What you thought that I’ll ditch you after we slept. No, of course…I am fine with you staying…I…want…you to stay the night. As long as you’re cool with it though…” Now it was him whose cheeks were tinged a rosy shade. 

“Ok, cool. I’ll stay with you”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

He tightened his hold on me, his arms ensnaring my back like a vice while my head nestled into his chest. I can hear his heart beating, the constant rhythm lulling me to sleep. 

“I don’t know how pillowtalk works…” I muttered as I kissed his chest right where his heart was. 

“It’s ok, let’s just sleep…” he looked down at me and kissed my forehead. 

“Good night, Mr. Cameron.” 

“Good night, Ms. Ramirez”

We fucked once again on the counter when he followed me to get some water in the middle of the night. And when I fell asleep then, I knew in my heart that this was just the beginning of something earth shattering. 

I had spent one night with him and it didn’t feel enough. 

Oh, I am so fucked. 

AN:

How writing this chapter got me like:

Also what I will be doing after this

Sooo....I know...my smut is so mid and my writing style has become a joke...sometimes...i don't even know what words to write...anywayss I just wanted to gift you guys a mediocre yet heartfelt gift from me...honestly I don't even know if I'll even write smut again....I'll try my best thoo...the next chapters will be going relatively fast (not really cuz each of my chap is atleast 2k+ words so baree with me) but crucial parts of the book cuz they're going to cement their relationship. I'm telling you all...this is going to be a longg ride...also I'm trying to make time for my studies as well as this so I'll make an effort to update as soon as I can butt again this is tentative.

ANYWAYS HAPPY VALENTINES/GALENTINES DAY. HOPE YOU LOVED THE CHAP AND AS ALWAYS LIKES, REBLOGS AND COMMENTS ARE ALWAYS APPRECIATED. It's so heartwarming when I see any kind of complement on my work. I write because I love this couple and also I wanna make sure that more people get into the fandom even if its thru my midass fanfic.

Let me know if you wanna be added to the taglist

Ciao. Stay hydrated and resteddd.

Taglist:

@lostsyren @araybiaaa @cherubfille @didddii589 @popou61 @rafecameronsfavourite @rafesofiapalomo @me-ig1 @beautyinsteadofashes

[angelasmooore]

The One where Sofia tells Rafe that they are having a baby

Heyy loves, I am supposed to be writing my actual story and working on my master thesis, but I can't shake this idea about how Rafe would feel if Sofia was pregnant. So here she is, my first full-fledged one-shot. I hope you guys like it considering that this is just a word vomit.

I'll upload it in Wattpad and Ao3 as soon as possible.

Enjoy. There's just a smidge of angst if you look very closely, but it's 99.9% pure fluff.

Taglist: @popou61 @araybiaaa

The moment that I knew that I was pregnant was actually on a random Thursday afternoon during work. 

My work as an English and Spanish teacher to primary kids and middle school students meant that my entire day is filled with chortles of “Yes Mam!” “No Mam” and “Thank you mam!” or “buenos días señora!” and “gracias señora!” I am surrounded by tender lives whose limbs, brains and hearts are ever growing with curiosity and unfettered affection for the world itself. And as a teacher, it is my job to make sure that they don't lose their light in their lives. So I love children, I grew up with two younger siblings who were kids when I was toeing into my twenties and so naturally I understand what it is like to raise a kid and take care of them. When I graduated from college with my English Masters, I was confuddled about what to do with my degree and scared that my career won’t be satisfying and I’ll end up slaving away in a job that will slowly kill my love and passion for literature. Then weirdly enough, I was helping my niece, Valerie Routledge about English grammar when she stayed at Rafe’s and my place and safe to say, I was enamoured with the idea of teaching. I remember using her dollies and all the cute trinkets to make her comprehend articles and Rafe sitting beside me whispering, “Looks like you found your calling”

And here I am, spending everyday with kids and mostly loving it.

Like any job, it has its good days and bad days. Most of the times, it's both; no matter how cute, innocent and fragile kids maybe, at one point you get exhausted from all the running around, changing your tone to being overly sweet and helping student’s clean their uniforms if they spill orange juice. 

But at the end of the day, I am witnessing actual human lives grow, explore and expand their tiny universes and I am proud and in awe that I play a big part in that process. 

So, yea I had a hunch when I knew I was pregnant. 

I was perched on the wooden bench on the staff lounge, munching on my Italian pesto sandwich and chilli flavored potato chips (It was Rafe’s turn to cook and he makes a mean Pesto chicken sandwich) as I read the note that he sent along with my lunch box. 

“I love you and I hope you have a great day. Hoping that I see you soon so that I can tell you all about my day and I hope you feel that way too.

I know my sandwich is bomb but still tell me how it was 

Yours, Rafael” 

At the end of the note, he signed his name along with cute hearts drawn around the corner. 

Fuck I was going to cry. And weirdly, I had been crying a lot. 

My unreasonable crying session got abruptly cut by my co-worker Andy whose bi-sexual pin shone in the sunlight; his maroon cardigan swung as he moved swiftly. He dropped onto the wooden bench beside me with his lunch on his hands. 

“Hey, how was the midterm, Sofia. Did you see teardrops on the answer sheet or only smiley faces?”

“Haha, Andy. They were all fine. I made sure the questions were relatively easy.” 

Rolling his eyes, he caught note of Rafe’s handwritten letter, cooing

“Awww, you guys are so cute!!! I don’t know who is lucky in this marriage, you or the blue-eyed beast you get to call your husband?” 

My cheeks bloomed into a rosy hue as I fumbled and fumferred to give an answer, I don’t know why, Rafe and I have been married for two years and dating since I was twenty-one.

I am twenty-eight now. 

I still blush when I think about us. I guess true love never really loses its charm even after seven years. After all, he is my first love, my first everything, I guess.

But again, I was at work and I was not comfortable enough to give a coherent answer. We are at a point in our relationship where we have seen each other morph into the best, loving version of each other. Rafe watched me turn into a more confident, more vivacious soul while I saw Rafe grow into a man that knows what he wants, holds mountains under his shoulders yet loves with so much devotion that is immeasurable. We both deserve each other in that way, I guess.

Instead, I said, “I don’t know Ands. What about you, Mr Biology Teacher?”

I forgot to tell you; Andy is a biology teacher for middle school / high school students at Outer Banks Public School. While I am a more fairly new addition to the institution, Andy has been working here for nearly six years while I started this job just after I got married two years ago. He also conducts special sessions for Sex-Ed too so there’s always an embarrassing story tucked under that hideous olive-green belt.

“Oh, the usual, taught a bunch of high schoolers about periods and that whole nasty business of it.”

Huh. Periods. When did I last got mine.

Wait….wait….what….

My eyes must have looked like it was going to pop out since Andy waved his hands in front of me asking, “Are you here, Mrs. Sofia”

“Huh…what”

“You were out of it for a minute, you, okay?”

Yes and no, I may be carrying a baby right now.

“Uh…yea I am fine, just tired I guess”

This is true, I have been actually restless the past three weeks. Tossing and turning in bed at night but felt like I needed to hibernate for the rest of the morning.

“Oh ok, let me know if you need any help demolishing that chocolate chip cookie” he laughed pointing at my lunch bag.

I was not interested in that conversation at all, no matter how much I respect Andy. My mind was running miles away from this earthly plane.

As he sauntered out of the hall, I grabbed my phone, scrolling furiously to click the Calendar app. I always noted the days when I was suffering from periods and to my luck or the lack of it, I was nearly a month late.

My hands trembled due to an undiscerning emotion; I didn’t know what to feel. Happiness and a sense of unflinching rush of love surged through me. I may have a mini-Rafe or mini me.

At the same time, I remembered this news meant Rafe’s worst fears coming to life.

He never said he didn’t want kids. Contrary to my prior statement, he always was down with us having kids even when we were dating, whispering in my ear that he wants to see me with his baby in my belly as we unravelled each other in the bed.

His past never graced him with the one thing a child actually needed: his parents love. His mom leaving the world early in a “car-crash” (Rafe still doesn’t believe it, calling it as BS) while his dad holding his roots on him but never actually nourishing him with affection. Ward Cameron used Rafe for his misgiving yet making him beg for his love like the Schrodinger’s cat. I don’t speak ill of the dead but I was kinda content with the fact that Rafe got mature enough to see through his dad’s shiny vacant words of sweet-nothings to discern that Rafe was always a means to his vile ends.

Rafe used to kiss the ground his dad walked on, I still remember holding him by his arms as he scattered his dad’s ashes in the sea, mumbling “I won’t forget you” It was way early in our relationship yet I knew that I would do anything to not to see the cerulean eyed boy cry.

As years rolled by and Rafe started to go to therapy, he confessed to me that he doesn’t know how to parse through the irony that even though Ward might have a sliver of love for him, he exploited his need for affection like it meant nothing. His hands were holding my waist as we laid in bed, his head finding a permanent safe purchase in my neck as his voice trembled;

“I’m scared, Sof”

My hands were caressing his buzzcut, holding him like a vice.

“Of what, Rafe?”

He paused for a moment, planting a small yet earth shattering kiss on my nape.

“That if we have a baby, they’ll forever be cursed by having a psycho as their dad like their grandpa was”

His words hit me like lightning but I further tightened my hold, pulling out his head from his haven to face me; earning a quiet whine from him.

“You listen to me, Rafe. You won’t going to be a bad dad, mi amor”

He opened his mouth to give me a rebuttal so I just shushed him.

“No, Rafe. I know that when you love someone, you sacrifice a piece of your heart. You give it all, Rafe. Just like you gave me yours. And I know for sure that if we have kids, they will be so happy that their dad loves them like no one else”

His blue eyes were clouded by a shroud of tears, threatening to bubble over as he spoke, “But what if I fuck up, baby? What if I am not…”

“No, don’t even think about it, Rafe. I know they’ll be so loved. Beside I will be here. With you. I would also be scared too, and I know you will hold my hand when I am feeling not my best. So don’t let your demons push you away from experiencing love, baby”

His tears were pouring out now. His limbs surrounding my body, afraid to let go.

“I love you” he said in his wispy, unwavering voice, “I love you more than anything and even if I don’t know if Ill be a good father but I know I won’t stop trying since I will love not only a piece of me but also you.”

Then it was my turn to cry, plucking butterfly kisses on his lips as we dreamed of washing away our parents mistakes and rewriting new ones.

That was four years ago. He still tenses at the mention of kids even though he is the “coolest uncle” (as quoted by Valerie) to our niece and the best brother-in-law to Theo and Isabella. He goes all in whenever Val or my siblings crashes at our place for a sleepover; buying all the snacks they ask and taking them on ice cream dates on the beach whenever Isabella, my sister comes to our home. Isabella is a soft spot for Rafe; obviously Valerie is his niece and loves her endlessly but Val has two more uncles and aunts who crowd her entire time and affections and considering Rafe and Sarah’s rocky yet amicable relationship; Val doesn’t exactly come see us very often. I know Rafe may seem nonchalant about it but I know that he hopes that he can fully repair their relationship. I hope so too. Isabella, however, loves Rafe to the ends of the Earth, she met Rafe when she was four and she was completely taken aback by my then-boyfriend turned now-husband. And he too didn’t hold back with the sweets or the bear hugs or the gifts since he wanted to impress my family and also, he saw Wheezie, his other sister in my Isabella. Though she is eleven, she still comes home to have sleepovers with me and sometimes brings her friends to our home to watch new releases.

And Rafe still calls her Button.

My husband should sometimes look in the mirror and contemplate all the bad things he says about himself.

Speaking of the devil, my phone lit with a small ping

I can hear his voice in the text as I read it, “Hey bb, u want me to pick u up after 2 hrs”

My fingers were shaking as I typed, “Yup :)”

For the next two hours, I was on autopilot; my mouth spewing out words on its accord as my brain was sinking in to the fact that I may be a mom in a year.

Or maybe not. Maybe its just a false alarm and I can just go about my day as usual.

But why did a miniscule part of my heart hoped to see if there’ll be two lines on the pregnancy test.

Whenever I saw Rafe treating his niece and my siblings like they were royalty, my heart always leapt, thinking about how our baby would be loved and adored by us. I thought about a little boy with wisps of mousy blonde hair running around with blue eyes like his daddy, laughing and barrelling towards me for a hug or a sweet little girl with jet black hair being carried around by her dada on his shoulders.

Rafe’s and my heart had been entwined with each other for nearly eight years and I cherish every single moment I get to spend with him. And the fact that we both are able to create our destiny and legacy makes me feel light hearted.

As the clock ticked to 3’o clock on the huge, wooden clock on the hallway, a stampede of students rushed from their classes, elated to leave their “hell-on-Earth” schools. As a teacher, I was standing at the entrance of the main building, helping kids around and waving them goodbyes.

 And like clockwork my husband pulled up in his black SUV with Ray Bans covering his eyes, a Black Depache Mode T-shirt adorning his broad shoulders; the car thrumming as it pulled up on the tarmac. He got out of the car, his middle finger playing with the keychain, sauntering like he owned the place.

Why does my breath always stop like I am seeing him for the first time?

“Hey baby, what you doing?” he said cooly, his hands finding home in my waist. He has no chill.

“Doing my job and you are disturbing it”

He stepped back, feigning offence, “Excuse me, Mrs Cameron, I thought you wanted me to come pick you up”

I too played along, crossing my arms on my chest, “Well Mr Cameron, I did call you but I need a minute to pack and there are still kids around here so keep it PG, yea?”

“Yes mam.”

So here I was, riding along like the passenger princess I am, observing my husband deftly drive around the neighbourhood as his other hand softly caressed my thighs. Touch is very important to him, I discovered from our relationship. It grounds him and I am more than happy to be his anchor.

“So how was work, any kid threw up on you?”

I was zoning out again, staring into his eyes and contemplating if I should tell that I may be pregnant.

“Sof, you good?” he asked, his tone carrying a hint of worry.

“Yeah, I am just tired” I repeated the same answer verbatim to my husband.

I need to be sure that I am pregnant. I can’t give him false promises or false alarms.

“Oh, its ok love, I’ll cook dinner tonight. Or we’ll order up, you wanted to hit up that new Thai spot right? yea maybe we’ll order in, catch up on some TV and have a nice shower, hmm maybe that will make your headache go away?”

I was seconds close to throwing myself onto him and holding him in the middle of the road. This is what I meant when I say nobody knows Rafe Cameron better than me. He holds me to the highest degree and every second he never fails to amaze me at how good he is as a husband.

All I could do was hold my tears at bay and palm his face, fingers bookmarking every freckle of his sculpted face.

“Yea, that would be great, Rafe”

As the orange hues of the evening sky eroded into the inky midnight, I laid awake behind Rafe’s sinewed chest, his hands on my belly, where our future child may be resting. As usual, his face was buried in the nape of my neck, soft breaths trying to lull me to sleep. But I couldn’t close my eyes.

I cannot just buy a pregnancy test from a pharmacy; I mean I could but I need to be sure.

All I could think about was how would Rafe digest the news if I was really pregnant. Will he spin me around in joy or will he rub his temples and pace around in fear. I was hoping and praying the former but I know that anything can happen.

The next day, I had a game plan. As Rafe was busy getting ready for work, I typed out a quick message to the substitute teacher, Ms. Fields that I would be coming late to work today and to take care of first period and second period for me. He was strutting around in his dark blue suit, red tie with gold stripes on his hands, rushing towards me for help. As usual. As my fingers went around the collar to loop the tie, I peered upto him since hes nearly a feet taller than me and as much I love it, sometimes I feel as though I am a dwarf compared to him. My voice came in whispers as if we were surrounded by a crowd when the entire mansion was occupied by only me and Rafe. And probably our future baby.

“Hey, I am taking my car today for work, ok”

His voice boomed across the hall, his forehead furrowing, “Why?” he pouted. Carpooling to work is our favourite part of the day where for half an hour we just blast some music and talk shit about our respective work lives or other people.

“Babes, I have some papers to grade and I may need the car to go to the supply store for Halloween decorations for the school"

He huffed whining “Fineeee….but I am not in favour of this”

“You are such a baby, Rafe!”

“What, I am sorry that I want to spend more time with my extremely hot wife.”

“Hmm, flattery won’t take you anywhere, Mr Cameron”

“Well, I say no, cause you take it up to your ass…”

“RAFE CAMERON YOU FILTHY…” I gawked as I hit him square on his chest

He grabbed me by my waist guffawing, “I’m joking, I’m joking…I’m joking”

After a hearty breakfast of eggs, toast and a bucket load of strawberries, Rafe and me parted ways, he is the CEO of Cameron Developments but he is not exactly following his dad’s footsteps to a T. When I got engaged, I laid out this base rule that If I am going to get married, he needs to stop zoning out “Pogue” areas and actually venture out of the area to find new developments. So now he is not only a developer in Outer Banks but one of the top property developers in North Carolina itself.

 Harsh, I know but I am not letting Rafe be a mob-brained “Kook” like everyone in this town is. I don’t know where I exactly belong in the social hierarchy of Outer Banks. I was born Pogue but married the Kookiest of the Kooks yet me and Rafe try not to associate ourselves with that binary. That’s why we live a bit further from Kildare, I was tired of feeling suffocated by fake laughs and snake-like lives of the Kooks and Rafe was exhausted from his reputation as a “psycho” so Rafe built us a home away from those conniving wolves and bit near to the Cut but still on the suburban area. Its just a couple of old people as neighbours who are actually very kind towards Rafe and me except the occasional, “Honey, the house sounds very lonely, you guys should have kids!”

Well, Martha’s dream is about to come true I guess.

*****

Prince’s missionary hospital with all of its ten storied glory was relatively free today. The hallways which are usually crowded with patients ambling slowly with catheters and gurneys rolling screeching on the sanitized floor was mostly vacant. But as I neared reception, I saw a familiar face come around the corner.

Pope.

And he sought me out before I decided if I was planning to acknowledge or avoid him.

“Hey, Sofia, what are you doing here, you ok?”

I forgot he was a doctor here. His badge which read, “Dr. Heyward” glistened under the sterile white lights of the room as she walked towards me, sporting a small smile.

Rafe and the Pogues’ relationship would forever be tainted due to history that Rafe doesn’t want to get into but most of the time, most of Sarah’s close friends are more than cordial with me. Val studies in my school and so Sarah and John B always make time to talk to me when they come pick up from class; I never actually had a proper interaction with JJ but the rest of them wave and ask about life if we encounter each other. And Pope and his fiancée Cleo has always been friendly towards me since I frequent the hospital for charity drives.

“Hey Pope, just here for a blood checkup” I fibbed since as much I like Pope; I really want Rafe to be the first person to know.

“Oh, is anything wrong?” he looked worried as he shrugged his white coat off.

“No, no. Everything’s great. I just wanted to see if my Hb levels are up to the mark, you know”

“I understand, well how’s umm….Rafe?” he fidgeted.

Rafe is a sour subject to all of the Pogues, and in a way I understand but it was nice that they still want to build an amicable relationship with me. I am even surprised that Sarah and Rafe’s relationship seems to be normal to say the least.

“Oh, he’s doing good as usual”

“How’s Cleo?” I actually talk to Cleo quite a lot since she’s also doing her online masters degree in UCLA so its nice to talk to her about academic stuff whenever I see her around.

“Oh, she’s rocking college and life, of course she’s doing more than great” he spoke, a warm smile gracing his lips.

“Well, I’ll let you do your check up I guess. Holla if you need any help.” He offered as he started to walk the other direction towards the lift.

“Thank you, and say hi to Cleo for me”

“WILL DO” his voice boomed as he disappeared from my eyeline.

I let out a small WHEW as I speed walked to the gynaecologists’ room. A tall woman with a blonde bob opened the door, heels clicking as she led me inside.

“Hi, Mrs Sofia….?” she said as was checking the form

“Cameron”

“Oh, ok, I am Dr Maria Adams, so you want to take a blood test to check for pregnancy?”

“Yea, I wanted to be sure.”

“That’s actually a very good decision. Sometimes, pregnancy tests can provide false positive results so I totally get it. So, when did you get your last period?”

“Last month, on 28th”

“Hmm got it. Do you feel tired”

“A lot, more tired than I have ever been”

“Do you feel some sort of tenderness on your breasts”

“I….” my mind raced back to a week ago when Rafe was grabbing my chest as we had sex and I remember him whimpering, “God your tits feel so good”

I cleared my throat, hoping that my cheeks don’t show my lewd daydreaming, I whispered “Yea”

“Ok, just give me a minute, let me take a blood sample and also an urine sample to make sure that you are really pregnant.”

I nodded, my mind coming around to the fact that life felt very real at this moment and that it may change forever today.

God, I really wish Rafe was here with me, encasing my hands with his and leaning onto his shoulder as I always do whenever life feels too taxing to live.

She came back with a plastic cup, two plastic test tubes, a needle and an unknown contraption with a belt. Maria saw through my apprehension and smiled, “Oh this is nothing, its only here if I can’t find a vein. I know everything seems very daunting but this is very very normal for all women when they find out they may be pregnant. This is not going to hurt at all. You’ll be fine ok” she comforted me; eyes softening and her hands gently placing the syringe onto my hands.

As she slowly injected the syringe onto my veins, I looked around the hospital room, pink and blue coloured posters about pregnancy, gestational diabetes, cute baby pictures and the development of a baby was strewn all around the rooms with some posters enlisting emergency numbers. Along with the prick, I felt overwhelmed, feeling slightly dizzy.

Thankfully, she retracted the needle, collecting the crimson red substance in two test tubes as she asked me to pee on a cup in the bathroom inside. After an embarrassing five minutes of peeing in a cup and actually giving it to the doctor, I washed my hands and fidgeted around the metal bench, hoping to get the results as soon as possible.

She came back with her writing pad on her hands saying, “so we’ll get the results by tonight or this evening so I’ll send the results to your phone. You okay with that?”

A whole day. Ugh. That’s why everyone uses the pregnancy tests from the drugstore. I don’t think I can hold out that long but for the sake of my sanity I just nodded and left, walking slowly towards my car.

With a storm brewing in my heart, I really didn’t want to go to work but I can’t just take a sick day when I may need those for future days when I would be actually sick. Reluctantly I dragged myself to work.

Surprisingly the day zoomed by pretty fast, and it was four in the afternoon. I was rearranging the benches as the principal when I heard a loud squeal coming from the hallway. Just as I was going to turn around, I felt a tiny pair of hands encircling my waist followed by an adorable giggle and sound of small bells chiming.

I knew who it was.

“AUNTIE SOFIAAA”

As I turned around, I found myself face to face with Valerie Routledge, my niece-in-law. She was beaming with a tooth missing in her smile; bracelets with colourful charms adorning her wrists and her blonde hair like her mom, sporting butterfly clips. She twirled with glee showing her off leaf green pinoform dress. I kneeled to her height, grabbing her for a bear hug.  

“Oh, my sweetness, how are you, mi amor!!! Had fun in class today?”

“OH, AUNT SOF, I HAD SOO MUCH FUN. I PAINTED A PICTURE OF A HOUSE WITH DAD, MOM AND THE BEACH, UH AND I PLAYED FOOTBALL WITH AMY AND NATHAN” she rushed in one breath to say all her adventures.

“That sounds so lovely, Val. Where are your parents, baby? Your classes must have gotten over an hour ago, if I am not wrong” I cajoled, pinching her button nose.

“We are here, Sof” I heard a booming voice calling me out. It was John B and Sarah standing in front of the classroom.

“Hey! Whats up? How’s the shop?” I went up to them, Valerie on my hips as she was swinging her hands in the air.

“Oh, you know its fishing season, so business is smooth. A little birdie here told me that you weren’t here in the morning so we just wanted to see how are you”

Shit. Shit.

“Oh I was just tired so I came late from home.” Dios Mio, the amount of lies I had to tell today…I truly am on a roll.

It was Friday so I asked them what their weekend plans was and conversation flowed smoothly from there. We were now sitting on the benches with Val keeping herself busy by passionately colouring her newest creation. I was interrupted by my phone ringing, knowing that it would probably be my husband, waiting impatiently in our home.

And when I unlocked my phone, it was Rafe who was calling.

“Hey Sof, its nearly five o’ clock, do you need me to come pick you up. Or you’re busy with work?”

“No, I’m here with your sister, John B and Val” as soon as I said it, Val squealed again and came running towards me screaming, “IS IT UNCLE RAFEY, I WANNA TALK TO HIM, PLEASE SOF!!!”

Not to pop her bubble, I gave my phone and Rafe recognized it immediately, cooing “Hey Valeria, you doing good?”

Though she doesn’t meet Rafe as much as she probably should, she loves her uncle endlessly. They do talk to each other on the phone once in every two weeks because she “loves all her uncles equally” She started going on a spiel about every minute detail of her day and Rafe was intently listening through the phone. As her voice went on and on for about five minutes, Sarah stopped her little rant by softly saying, “Baby we gotta go, your aunt seems tired. She also needs to go home and talk to uncle Rafey, doesn’t she?”

“It’s fine, Sarah” It is true, I am tired and my phone weighs a ton of bricks with my message from the hospital as I heard it ping ten minutes ago.

“Oh, ok. Lemme say bye to him”

As that took two minutes more, Val, Sarah and John B took off, giving me my phone with Rafe on the line.

“Hey, you sure that you don’t want me to come pick you up?”

“It’s fine, I’ll be there in ten”

My consciousness felt shaky, god I need to go home. As I cut the call, I immediately went to my Messages and saw the message from the hospital with a pdf file attached to it. My hands hastily clicked the document scrolling through the unnecessary details to see the verdict.

It wrote

Patient No: 549202

Name: Sofia Cameron

Status: Pregnant

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.

*******

“And you know I want to construct the school there but obviously the government says the land was actually written off for this rich guy who lives in…Tennesse…of all places…”

I was mindlessly nodding to everything my husband was saying as my hands went automatic mode in stirring the curry for dinner. He was perched on the counter near me, talking about his day while I was racking my brain and heart on how to let him know that we are going to have a baby.

I am going to have a baby. Me and Rafe are going to be parents.

I turned towards Rafe, who was looking godly as usual with his knitted blue shirt and sweatpants, his hands gesticulating as he spoke. Aquamarine eyes pouring all of its love onto me as he gently held me by the waist now. God, I don’t know what he’s going to say.

He clocked my wavering stance and looked at me again,

“Sof, are you sure that you’re ok? You’re pretty out of it today, baby.”

I don’t what to feel; elated or terrified. I feel like throwing up and my breasts really hurt.

Instead, I went with the classic, “Yup, just tired from work.”

“If you get really tired like this every day, I’ll take you to the doc, you know. See what’s bothering you?”

I did go to the doctor, well.

“We’ll wait for a week to see, Rafe”

“Ok then. But I am really worried, Sof” he said as he was kissing my neck hands slowly rocking my body along with his.

I switched off the stove, turning my body towards him, my hands finding its natural home on the back of his buzzcut. He was sporting a mullet three months ago but he got tired of grooming his hair in the summer and has again started shaving his hair into a buzzcut. Times like this, I feel like I am reliving my early twenties when I see his buzzcut, my heart naïve yet adamant of the fact that the man in front of me would hold my heart with his and never let go. And inspite of all of the trials our relationship we went through, we ended up gripping onto each other as the waves went harder and gladly, we experienced the light shining into our lives. Together.

And I know that we’ll be alright.

I stood on my tiptoes, plucking a kiss from his lips and as usual, my husband took it as a cue to bend down to my level; grabbed me by the flesh of my thighs and one kiss led to a constellation of stolen kisses on my face and whispers of love. He carried me across the room to the sofa like a feather, soft and careful. And the thought of facing the real life with very real confessions left my thinking for a little while, my heart overflowing with only adoration and devotion for the man laying and loving on top of my body.

As midnight struck again and the ink blue sky was holding all of the stars and letting planes fly by its stratosphere I was left to plan again for the second time, pondering about a cute plan to reveal my pregnancy to Rafe.

My husband was in between worlds, reality and dreams as I heard him grunt and softly whistle in his sleep. I turned around to see him, lashes fluttering on his eyelids; looking serene. I wonder whose eyes our baby will have? I badly hope its Rafe’s but I will love our bundle of joy no matter how they look or who they will be.

I gave a gentle kiss to his forehead, hoping that sleep will also hold its dreamy hands to make me fall asleep too.

****

I was underestimating how much cards there are in a single supermarket for a pregnancy reveal. And how much baby clothes one single store has.

My hands were on my hips as I was closely rifling through the gift aisle of a novelty shop. I wanted to buy a cute card to gift Rafe when I break the news to him along with a cute onesie. I know it’s a very anticlimactic and probably overused method of a pregnancy reveal but I am enthralled yet overwhelmed to tell him that we’re pregnant. I was also planning on baking cupcakes to celebrate or eat it in misery (depending upon Rafe’s reaction) but then my feet started killing me and I planned just to buy some cupcakes from the bakery and put icing on it myself.

Huh, pregnancy does cost a lot of money and time. But that’s just everything in life I guess.

Then my eyes wandered around other gifts where there were a lot of photo frames and stuff. That sparked an idea in me.

Bingo.

All I need to do is go to the hospital right now.

And of course, the bakery.

*****

One thing about Rafe Cameron is that he intently listens and follows to everything that I say. And I deeply love him for it.

And so when I told him that I wanted to go to the beach when he came back from work at three pm, he just said, “Lemme pack sunscreen and a blanket” I felt giddiness in my bones.

And so here we are, nearing the moment that will change our lives, for better or worse. I was admiring my husband as we walked to our special spot in the beach where we first kissed. We always come here once or twice a month, just to sit and be in awe of the waves crashing onto the shore, the wide blue ocean freezing time, washing away all our worries and pains atleast for some minute. I wanted to create a perfect moment when I told him I was pregnant but I realised that every place and moment that I spend with him is a perfect place and perfect time. The sun was kissing the horizon leaving space for purple skies and cotton candy tufts of clouds.

As we sat down, with me sitting between his legs and his chin perched on my head, I slowly opened my beach bag to give him the meticulously wrapped gift.

“Rafe?”

He was gazing at the ocean as he hummed a response, “Yeah”

I got out of his hold as I faced to look at him “I have something to tell you.”

Now all of his attention was on me.

“What happened, Sof?”

I slowly put the wrapped gift onto his hands. “Open it”

He looked skeptical yet so adorable, his rosy lips forming a smile, “Baby, its not my birthday today” as he started to unravel the gift deftly, taking off the tapes one by one; carefully noting that I took time to wrap it.

“Just….open it.”

“Yea, yea. You see I am doing it”

As he opened the gift box, his eyesight went first to the photo album, he shot a undecipherable look, quietly laughing, “You’re crazy, Sof”

He opened the album, and I went near him to gauge his reaction. A grin adorned his lips as he saw photos of me and him in recent times, on vacations, photos of when we were dating, moments frozen in time of us doing funny faces, silly laughs, and untarnished love. He was smiling wide when looking into our wedding photos, me being carried around by his arms and our bodies floating on the dancefloor.

“I love it, Sofia. I am going to probably frame these pics. Jesus, I forgot these existed.

“Go to the last page, Rafe” I was now holding my heart in my hands, my eyes close to tearing up.

He saw my emotional disposition and flipped onto the last pages. And there it was.

On the left side, there were two photos, baby photos of me and him, Rafe sporting an cheek-pinching aww-moment smile while I was pointing my fingers to my cousin brother. Then he saw the other side.

There was a note. It read, “In next nine months, there’ll be a photo of me, Daddy!”

He was stunned for a moment; mouth agape and his eyes followed the writing on the note multiple times to make sure what he read was true. Slowly, he looked at me. His voice was wobbling as he asked me, “Sofia…are you…?”

I was full on bawling now, “Yeah…I am pregnant.”

“We’re….having…a baby?”

“Yup.”

“I…” he was kneeling in front of me now, cradling my head in his hands like he’s holding his entire world as his other hand slowly went up to my belly, delicately caressing it.

“I am also terrified as fuck and its alright if you are too but I am also so happy. I know that you’re sca..”

“What if I ruin our baby’s life, Sof” this was his first response.

He was trembling now, and I didn’t know if it was from affection or fear.

“You won’t. I swear, you will be the best dad, baby.” The waves felt like background music now.

“You don’t know how fucking happy I am, Sofia but I’m…baby…what I fuck up, and our kid turns out to be like me. I know that if our baby is like you, I will be the luckiest mother fucker on Earth but there is a high chance that he or she will turn out like me and then…”

I was both tired and sad that he will always see himself through his worst parts while my vision will always view his bad parts or what used to be his bad parts just as the stitches holding his golden, brazen and passionate parts of his soul. So I cut his rambling with a swift kiss. Our lips melded into each other as our hands tightly manoeuvring each other; silently promising not to let each other go.

I slowly and sombrely drifted away from his lips as I said, “First of all, mistakes will happen, Rafe but don’t tell me that our baby being like you is a bad thing when I know that then they will grown to be the most loving, affectionate person ever. And I am here, I am not going anywhere. Don’t you think that I am also afraid that I may also make mistakes. Yes, but I know that our baby will be alright because we will be there for them no matter what happens.”

He looked at me like I hung the stars for him, he eyes looked enamoured as he spoke, “God, I love you so much and no matter what happens, I know that our baby is a part of you and I swear to God, I will love it more than my life, Sof”

“See, you are more than being a good dad, and they haven’t even come out of me yet.” I was laughing, happy tears covering my eyeline.

We stared into each other eyes, trying to come around the fact that we are on the cusp of the grandest part of our lives. All I knew that as long as we had each other, we can quell each other’s storms of our hearts and paint the darkest corners of our minds with technicolour.

As we were giggling, high on life and from the sugar from the choclate cupcakes. we both knew.

Life was going to be more beautiful. And we were ready for it with open arms. 

Yea, so that’s how I knew that we were pregnant.

[angelasmooore]

“i hate you.” sofia murmurs, feeling the immediate hypocrisy of her words the moment a moan slips through her lips when she feels rafe’s hands squeezing at her ass as he presses her against the counter. he crowds her, stepping in between her legs as he barricades her body between his. his fingers tighten their grip on her waist, tugging her closer until there’s not a barrier of space left between them.

she gasps at the friction, the heated pressure of his erection brushes against her thigh. she bites roughly on his lower lip, annoyed at the smug smirk she feels tugging on his lips –– asshole. her hands curl around his nape, pulling him down to her leveled height so that she’s able to capture his lips at a better angle. she hears his throaty groan, feels the way his fingers touch and grope every inch of her skin.

there’s something intimate that lingers –– how he holds her by the waist and brushes his thumb against the sliver of skin that peeks beneath her shirt as it rides up. she swallows the thickness of emotion that clogs in her throat and instead redirects her focus to tugging at the zipper on his pants.

she wants to hate him.

more than anything.

because of what he did and what he said but she still feels her pulse quickening with every touch and her knees buckling with every kiss.

[angelasmooore]

YES! RAFIA RECONCILIATION AND SMUT

Want to start from the beginning? Chapter 1

**Warning: Mature/Sexual content. Read with caution**

Eternal

Chapter 21: Mexico - Reverence

"How do these look?" Sarah asks, propping her foot on one of the low benches. She proudly showcases a pair of sturdy yet stylish hiking boots, slamming the sole down to emphasize their durability.

They had made it to an adventure supply store, one that John B had tracked down on the internet a short drive from their Airbnb. It smelled of fresh rubber and canvas and was filled with rows of backpacks, tents, and camping essentials for the day-and-a-half excursion Pope had surmised.

Standing beside Sofia, arms crossed, Rafe barely glances at Sarah's boots before scoffing. "You're not making a fashion statement. You need practicality."

Sarah shoots him an unimpressed look. "I can look good while making sure it's functional for me," she argues, chin tilting up.

A few feet away, Kiara and Cleo exchange amused glances, muffling their laughter.

Sofia smirks, glancing between the siblings. "To be fair, Rafe’s got a point. Your feet will hate you if you choose the wrong ones."

Sarah gestures toward her choice. "They're waterproof, have ankle support, and are cute. Best of both worlds."

Rafe huffs, shaking his head. "You're ridiculous."

"And yet," Sarah singsongs, lifting her foot again before dramatically spinning on her heel, "I'm still going to be the one with better-looking feet by the end of this."

Already sifting through another rack of boots, John B doesn't look up as he vocalizes, "As long as no one complains about sore feet, we'll all survive."

"I can get behind that." Cleo chimes in.

Sofia picks up a pair of boots, testing their weight in her hands. Rafe lingers near her, then nudges her with an elbow, his voice low enough for only her to hear.

"You're not gonna make me carry you if you pick the wrong ones, are you?"

She scoffs, tossing him a look. "Please, I'll be carrying you."

His mouth quirks up at the corner, and for a moment, it feels like they're back to months ago before everything got hard, when teasing each other was an afterthought. Rafe moves on, shifting to another section of boots, but Sofia shakes her head, pretending her heart didn't just stutter.

At checkout, the cashier barely spares them a glance as she scans through their pile—hiking boots, tents, water filters, headlamps, and whatever else Pope deemed necessary. The total flashes on the screen, and for a brief second, Sofia catches Rafe's hesitation. His fingers grip the credit card just a little too hard, jaw tightening as something unreadable flickers across his face before he hands it over.

When the receipt prints, he shoves it in his pocket, shoulders stiff as he grabs one of the bags. And honestly, regardless of how pissed she was at him—not that she is anymore—Sofia can't help but check on him.

"You good?" she asks, voice casual as she slides up beside him.

Rafe barely glances at her, adjusting the bag's weight in his grip. "Yeah."

Liar.

"Liar."

He ignores her, but there's the slightest shake of his head. She doesn't push; she lets the silence stretch as they walk.

A few blocks from their rental, she tries again. "You sure everything's okay?"

"A middle-aged man ran off with almost half a million of my money. My dad's legacy is currently down nearly three hundred grand. And I'm stuck in Mexico searching for what... treasure? Eternal life?"

She stays quiet.

"Not really going how I imagined the last two months."

"Maybe not. But in what world would you ever imagine you'd be chasing a potential supernatural life-altering discovery?"

"I know how the last few treasure hunts ended for me." He exhales. "Not confident this one's gonna be any different."

"Rafe Cameron without confidence? I don't know him."

He glances at her. Almost wary.

She doesn't press, just offers a small smile. They walk silently the rest of the way, but it's not as heavy as before.

Content in just being.

~~~~~

The new rental Jeep—retrieved by John B and Pope, who have zero regard for legalities or alternative options—sits parked and ready, gassed up for the seven-hour drive inland. They didn't hesitate. Didn't second-guess. This was it. One way or another, they were doing this.

The town they're heading to is about thirty minutes from the lake Pope swears is the one depicted in the Mayan temple. They'd sat around the old wooden table this morning with a flimsy paper map from the local store, tracing and retracing the same route, cross-checking it against John B's scribbled notes from the museum.

Sofia just hopes they're right.

Because once they hit the trails, there's no cell service. No backup. No lifeline.

The thought lingers, settling uneasily in her stomach. The what-ifs are stack ling up too fast. What if they're wrong? What if they don't find anything? What if Groff finds them first?

Sarah had told her what happened back at the pyramid—when they finally faced Groff in person for the first time in weeks, how he had brazenly ordered Dalia's men to fire near Rafe. Not at him—near him. A calculated warning. It was close enough to rattle, unnerve, and remind them who held the power.

Sofia hadn't been there. But just hearing about it made her heart sink. Still does.

Loading up isn't much of a fanfare. They move fast in the thick early afternoon heat, fueled by the need to get out of here, to put some distance between themselves and this place. A new town, a new place might not be a clean slate, but at least it's something.

She keeps an eye on Rafe the entire time. He doesn't smile much, but there's something in the way he moves—more focused. He cracks a few sarcastic jokes under his breath, the kind that ripples through the group in small waves. Pope huffs a laugh. Sarah rolls her eyes. Even John B, who's had more than enough reasons in the past to keep his distance, snorts at a few of them.

To Sofia, it feels like Rafe's coming back into his own. Like some part of him— the previously worn parts—has started to mend.

She watches as he helps Sarah with her pack, lifting the overstuffed bag into the back of the Jeep like it's nothing. The way his gaze flicks toward her—just a second, just to make sure she's good—lingers longer in Sofia's mind than it should. And when John B starts wrestling with the growing pile of gear, trying to Tetris everything into place, and Rafe, without a sigh or a single complaint, steps in to help.

John B thanks him. No animosity. Not even a blink of surprise.

Maybe Rafe's not doing as bad as she thought.

Either way, the Jeep is packed, the doors slam shut, and with one last glance at the town fading in the rearview, they proceed forward into whatever's to greet them next.

~~~~~

The drive feels long, the roads narrowing as they trek further inland. It would've felt shorter back in the States, where highways cut clean through cities, where civilization never felt so distant. But here, there's nothing but miles of dense, untouched green. The trees stretch high on either side of the cracked, sun-bleached road, the terrain growing wilder, more untamed. It's the kind of landscape that swallows, leaving only the engine's hum and the occasional bump of tires over uneven pavement.

Sofia sits behind Rafe, watching the back of his head and the shift of his shoulders every time he leans an arm against the door. It's stupid how aware she is of his presence. How much space he takes up just by existing.

She leans back, resting her head against the seat, watching the jungle blur past.

About three hours in, they stop at a small town—one of those places that barely exists on the map, where locals eye them warily but don't seem surprised by outsiders passing through. A few market stalls line the street, and the smell of cooking meat drifts from an open-air food stand on the corner.

Sofia feels the Jeep jolt as John B shifts it into park. He swings out of the driver's seat first, stretching with a groan.

"Gas and food. We need both."

Pope, already scanning the town, nods. "And water. I really want some water right now."

Rafe as he steps out of the Jeep, holds out his hand for her to steady herself with as she jumps down onto the uneven gravel. Hand warm in hers. Brief.

He doesn't say anything, just shoves his hands into his pockets, scanning their surroundings with that careful, unreadable look he always gets when they're somewhere new. Not tense, exactly, but watching. Sizing things up.

He always does that—like he can't fully relax no matter where they go, like something in him is wired to be on edge.

Sofia tells herself she isn't watching him. Not really.

But she notices everything. How his gaze lingers on the locals, how his shoulders stay taut even as he walks toward the gas station with John B. Not suspicious, not hostile, just… aware.

She exhales, rolling her shoulders as she steps onto the uneven pavement. The air here is thick, clinging to her skin, the jungle pressing close in a way that makes her stomach tighten.

The group naturally separates—John B and Rafe heading for the gas station, Pope making a beeline for the nearest market stall, and Sarah stepping toward the tiny convenience store.

She lingers a second longer by the Jeep, her gaze drifting past the edges of the town to where the road disappears into green nothingness. Just beyond that, somewhere deep in the rainforest, is whatever they're chasing.

She just hopes they’re all ready for it.

~~~~~

They finally make it to their rental in a small town, a bit off the beaten path but surprisingly well-kept for being farther from the much larger populous cities. The house is a little rough around the edges—worn paint, creaky floorboards—but cleaner than any of them had anticipated. They shuffle through the doorway, the weight of travel hanging heavy on their shoulders, and quickly divide up sleeping arrangements, all in agreement that sleep is the only decision.

Sofia finally gets into bed just after eleven, exhaustion clinging to her limbs. She sinks into the mattress, clicking off the bedside lamp and letting the room fall into darkness, a dull light from the moon casting shadows. The quiet hum of the outdoors settles around her as she snuggles beneath the covers, shifting until she finds a comfortable position.

A short, light knock rasps against the bedroom door.

"Yeah," she whispers, loud enough for her voice to carry.

The door softly creaks as it opens.

"Hey," Rafe murmurs.

She turns her head, eyes adjusting to the darkness, making out the shadow of him leaning in through the cracked doorway. Blinking against the darkness, she clicks the lamp back on. A soft yellow glow bathes the room, illuminating his face. His blue eyes squint slightly, adjusting to the sudden brightness.

"Hey?" she echoes, propping herself up on her elbows, brow raised.

"You need anything?"

She studies him in the dim lighting, her hazel eyes locking onto his blue, searching for something beneath the surface. Slowly, she shakes her head.

"Just let me know—"

"Rafe…"

He stops speaking. His hand lingers on the doorknob, fingers twitching.

"Yeah?"

"I'm proud of you." She sits up.

His lips part slightly, brow furrowing.

She means it. Rafe doesn't open up easily, not with most people. With her? More than not, but never all the time. With Kiara, though, with someone who sees him and has experienced a completely different side than her, no. And yet, he did.

He shuffles further into the room, cautious.

"For?"

"Sarah and I overheard you the other night. With Kiara."

His expression shifts, his eyes darting to the floor. He exhales sharply. "Ah. That."

"That," she affirms.

Silence stretches between them longer than it should, but it isn't uncomfortable. It's a pause filled with understanding, with the unspoken weight of everything left between them. She has always appreciated their relationship—the ability to just exist together without the need to fill every moment with words.

"How do you feel now?" she asks softly.

She doesn't move as he fully steps into the room. And she doesn't protest when he closes the door behind him—after all, the others are sleeping. It's only considerate.

"Better."

She nods, waiting, sensing there's more. He doesnt quite continue.

"Is there anything else?" she asks as he inches closer to the bed.

After a few moments of staring silently at each other, he sits on the edge like he's testing the waters. She allows it. 

"I'm sorry." 

She doesn't speak.

"I agreed—no more lies, no more secrets. And yet, I kept the ones I hated the most." He exhales, running a hand through his hair. "And of all people, Kiara was brave enough to say something."

"I owe her," Sofia admits.

Rafe's face falls slightly at her words. But it's true. She can't ignore that, without Kiara, she might never have learned these things about him. He never would have wanted her to. So, in a way, she owes Kiara a debt of gratitude for removing the slightly tinged rose-colored glasses from her view of him. 

"Yeah," Rafe mutters, his voice low, picking at a loose thread unraveling from the comforter. His gaze lifts back to hers. "I can't say there aren't more things in my past that I haven't thought of yet. There's a lot, unfortunately. But I think the worst of it, you now know. And how that changes your view of me… I'll live with it."

She exhales slowly. Listening.

"I just… I love you and—"

Fuck it.

She can't help herself. 

Her hands find the back of his neck, pulling him toward her in one swift motion, launching herself at him all the same.

His hands react instantly, gripping her, fingers digging into the soft flesh of her bare thighs as he lifts her onto his lap. Instinctively, she tightens her knees around his hips, their mouths meeting messily. Almost bruising in nature.

She doesn't know how long they stay like that, attached. Fused together, moving together. 

"Sof—" Rafe groans into her mouth as she grinds her hips down softly again, the growing bulge in his jeans pressing against her in a way that makes her stomach tighten. She cradles his head between her hands, fingers slipping into the short hair at the back of his head, scratching lightly.

She breathes him in—his scent, his touch, the way his hands grip her thighs with just enough force to make her shiver. He pulls her hips against his, once, twice, until the friction has her gasping.

She barely registers, pulling herself away from him, her mind clouded. His hands trace up her back, warm against her skin, slipping beneath the hem of her shirt. She lets him lift it, raising her arms. He bunches it up and chucks it away. Her chest is bare. 

Rafe never once hesitates. His eyes search hers first before his hands cup her face, guiding her back into him. She lets him. She lets him shove his tongue in, hands run ragged over her bare skin. She lets him in. 

"Off," she breathes against his lips, her hands moving to the hem of his shirt, fingertips sliding up his chest.

He follows her lead, lifting his arms to let her tug it over his head before gripping her waist and pulling her closer again. Their mouths fusing together, urgent… desperate. She traces her fingertips across his torso, teasing, reveling in the way he shudders beneath her touch.

She feels hot all over, a fire that spreads rapidly as his lips trail down her neck, his tongue flicking against the pulse point just beneath her jaw. Her body shivers, overwhelmed by the push and pull of his hands, his mouth, the way he alternates between rough and impossibly soft.

A moan slips from her lips—soft, unintentional, but enough to startle them both.

She pulls back, breath heavy. She could stop. Be rational. Tell him this isn't going to happen. But she'd be lying to herself.

"Condom?"

Rafe stills, blinking at her, then exhales, eyes half-lidded, "Not really carrying one on me at the moment." He captures her lips briefly.

Disappointment flashes in her expression, her brain reluctantly catching up to reality.

"But," he murmurs, lifting her off his lap with ease, "maybe they have some."

She watches as he strides to the bathroom, disappearing inside. The distant shuffle of cabinets being searched fills the silence. She leans over, grabbing his discarded shirt, covering herself momentarily.

Her libido is raging.

He pops back out of the bathroom carrying a small box. 

"What are the odds this random Airbnb just happens to have a box of condoms?" he muses, stepping back toward the bed. He towers over her as he hands her the box. "It's in Spanish."

She flips the package over, searching for the expiration date. Her heart hammers against her chest.

"Still good?" Rafe asks, voice dropping lower as he leans in, the warmth of his breath skimming her neck. His fingers ghost along her waist, sending a shiver through her. Before she can answer, his lips find hers again, stealing whatever words were about to form on her tongue. The kiss is deep, searing—designed to distract. And it does. Completely.

When they pull back, her breath is uneven, her chest rising and falling against his. She nods. He plucks his shirt from her and drops it back on the floor. 

His hand cups her neck, thumb tracing slow, deliberate circles beneath her jawline. Blue eyes search hers, flickering with something unreadable.

"Are you sure?" he murmurs.

Sofia bites her lip, nodding without hesitation.

His thumb presses lightly against her chin, coaxing her swollen lip free from her teeth before he leans in again, kissing her with slow deliberation—one of those everything-you-want kind of kisses. Toes curled, breath caught, eyes rolled. 

And he does it again as he lays her down, as he peels away her underwear, as he struggles momentarily with his own jeans and briefs, muttering something under his breath that makes her smile against his lips. As he rolls the condom on, pressing another kiss to her bare shoulder, he doesn't rush a single movement.

He kisses her like it's life itself, like he needs it more than air, and she has no complaints.

He's slow with it and sweet and rough. His lips trail down Sofia's neck before biting at the soft spot where her neck meets her shoulder, making her gasp as he finally sinks into her.

An inhale is all she can manage before her hands find his back, nails dragging along the expanse of his shoulder blades, needing something to hold onto.

Rafe groans, the sound low and guttural, his breath warm against her skin. His fingers skim down her ribs, light, and teasing, before settling on her waist, gripping tightly. He shifts, adjusting her beneath him, his touch rough yet reverent, like he wants her exactly the way he has her now.

And then he moves.

His hips roll into hers, sharp, precise, stealing the breath right from her lungs.

His lips claim hers again, slow this time, a contrast to the pace he sets. Sofia tries to match it, to meet him in the middle, but the pleasure unravels her too fast, leaving her pliant underneath him.

Her mouth parts, gasping against his lips.

He, ever the pleaser, drags his lips down her collarbone, across her chest, pressing open-mouthed kisses to every inch of skin he can find. When he speeds up, she feels it everywhere, the coil inside her tightening, stretching unbearably close to breaking.

"Rafe," she groans softly, her fingers curling against the muscles of his back, her body arching.

He takes the opportunity, trailing a hand between them, his hips and fingers moving in tandem. A few long, excruciatingly perfect moments later, the tension inside her snaps.

Everything disappears.

Her breath catches, her body tensing, then unraveling all at once. A rush of warmth spreads through her veins, euphoria and endorphins, lighting up every nerve ending, clouding her thoughts.

Rafe follows soon after, his movements turning erratic as he stutters, his head falling against her shoulder, his breath hot and heavy against her skin.

Sofia brushes a soft hand down his spine, soothing as his hips slow, their ragged breathing the only sound in the dimly lit room.

They just exist in the aftershock, tangled together, chests rising and falling against each other.

Neither of them speaks for a long moment.

————————————

After a minute or two, their breaths slow in unison, syncing naturally. The lingering heat between them fades into something softer. 

Sofia is the first to move. She leans away, slipping from his arms and over the side of the bed, reaching for his discarded shirt. Rafe watches her closely, searching for any flicker of regret, any shift in her expression that might signal second thoughts. But in the dim light, her face remains unreadable.

She pulls the fabric over her head, slipping from his grasp completely as she stands. Without a word, she disappears into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. Shutting him out.

Rafe exhales, running a hand through his hair. He waits. Listens. The faint sound of water running and the floorboards creak as she moves inside. He cleans himself up, letting the minutes stretch. Two. Five. Ten.

This is probably his cue to leave. To slip out quietly, with as little fallout as possible. He's already intruded—on her rest, on her solitude.

With that thought, he pushes himself upright, reaching for his briefs first, then his jeans. He steps into them, fastening the button deliberately.

"Where are you going?"

Her voice startles him. Soft. A little accusatory.

He turns. Sofia stands in the doorway, arms crossed over his shirt, bare legs peeking out from underneath.

"I, uh—" he hesitates, choosing his next words carefully. "Was gonna give you some space."

Her brow furrows. "Why?"

He shifts on his feet. "I figured maybe—"

"That I'd want to be alone after that?"

The air in the room shifts—something heavy settling between them.

She swallows, "I don't wanna be."

His eyes snap back to hers. "What?"

"Alone." She takes a few slow steps forward. "I don't wanna be alone."

Her fingers find the waistband of his jeans, undoing the button again, tugging the zipper down. The small, intimate sound echoes in the quiet room. But it's her touch that undoes him completely—her hands shifting up, cupping his face, thumbs skimming along his cheekbones with a tenderness that makes his chest ache.

"I want you right here."

His breath hitches. He searches Sofia's gaze, looking for hesitation, for doubt. But there is none.

She lets go, stepping around the bed to pull on her underwear as he exhales, letting his jeans drop. He steps out of them once more; the decision is final, easy.

The silence that follows isn't awkward. It's comfortable. Familiar. It's almost domestic how they both peel back the covers and slip beneath them again.

She reaches for him, fingers curling around his bicep in a gentle tug. An invitation. He moves without hesitation, shifting closer until his legs press against hers, his chest warm at her back. One arm tucks beneath his head while the other drapes around her waist, pulling her in.

She laces her fingers through his. Sighs as she settles.

Minutes pass. The room is silent, save for their breathing, slow and steady.

Then, softly—

"I love you."

Rafe exhales deeply. Closes his eyes.

"I love you."

He presses a kiss to her shoulder, lingering.

Fuck. If he isn't absolutely, completely, irrefutably in love with this woman.

Despite everything—despite the weight lingering in the air and thoughts that could haunt him if he let them—he drifts off faster than he has in months.

Lulled by the warmth of her body against his. By the steady rise and fall of her breath.

The best damn sleep he's had in months.

————————————

Next part: Coming soon

[angelasmooore]

Igual Que Un Angel

Chapter Twelve

Synopsis: Sofia is pregnant, and the last thing she needs is for Rafe to find out. It’s her dirty secret, it’s not like he’s barging down her door to speak to her. He looks as if he’s done with her for good. Will outside forces, force Sofia to confront the situation at hand. Or will she be able to keep this secret up? Not like, her belly isn’t growing everyday or anything.

Author’s note: once again viewer discretion is advised. This may not be as heavy as I had thought. But just in case.

MASTERLIST

Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13

“Shit!” Rafe was trying to beat the traffic but it seemed like everyone was out today. It shouldn’t have taken this long for him to get to the hospital. He honked his horn once more. His anger palpable in his bmw.

He swerves out of another car’s way, the other car honking his horn at Rafe. As he honks it back.

“She’s giving birth right now!? She was just about to be eight months pregnant!” Sarah panics, her eyes looking around the cars surrounding them.

“I know! I know!” Sarah held his phone, the phone ringing, Rafe hit the gas, going above the speed limit.

“Hello?” Lupita voices cuts through the screen, her call being put on speaker. “Rafe?” She sounds like a scared little girl. Rafe feels dread filling him like a balloon. He couldn’t think the worst yet though, he had to believe everything was okay.

“Hey! It’s uh it’s not Rafe. I mean it is he’s—”

“Sarah…”

“Right, sorry, it’s his sister Sarah. He’s driving so he can’t be on the phone. Is everything okay?”

Lupita’s sobs fill through the phone and into the car, making his stomach drop. Suddenly, the car felt stiffer, less spacious. No, please no.

He wouldn’t know what he’d do if he lost either Sofia or the baby. His mind going into a dark place, as it imagines him losing them both. He couldn’t live if that came to pass. He wouldn’t know what he’ll do. It’ll be like his dad dying all over again. Like his mom.

“I-I don’t know. They had to kick me out because I fainted.” It would had been something they all would have laughed at, had it not been such a dyer situation.

“You fainted?”

“Blood isn’t easy for me to see and there was so—”

Rafe hand tightens around the steering wheel. He feels like he’s almost floating out of his body. His eyes darting briefly to see Sarah is speaking. But it’s like he’s watching from the back seat. Not the one driving. Not the one experiencing this.

“We’re trying to beat traffic as best as we can. We’ll be there soon, okay. Hold on tight.” Lupita replies but Rafe can’t seem to hear it. It’s almost like he’s floating out of his body, he manages to finally make it to the hospital. And he doesn’t remember how.

“Push Sofia! Push!” The doctor yells, Sofia pushes with all her might. Her forehead sheened with sweat. This wasn’t how this was meant to go. This wasn’t how they’d planned this.

“Ahhh!” She cried out, her legs shook as she continued to push. She gritted her teeth as she continued to scream. Her eyes clenched shut, she just wanted Rafe. Needed him here more than anything in the world.

She feels herself thrashing against the sheets, unable to hold onto anything. Pain surrounds her like overgrowth, something inescapable. It feels like she’s being torn inside out. Being reshaped. No words can escape her lips, almost like she’s trapped.

Was this the universe laughing in their face? Almost taunting them, punishing her. Reminding them, no matter how much they tried, they could never get their relationship right. Sofia felt a white hot pain shoot up her back, she screamed once more. She couldn’t bear it, her vision blurring.

“One more push!” The doctor says, the sound of cries fills the hospital room. Sofia eyes finally unclenching, her breathing a little shaky. She continues to hear the cries of her baby, her eyes filling with tears. Her baby, her and Rafe’s baby. Their baby.

“Congratulations, Sofia. She’s here.” But they don’t place her baby into her arms. Sofia feels her heart sink, something’s wrong. Something’s wrong.

“Wait, wait I want to—”

Darkness begins to form at the edges of her vision. The last thing she hears is the nurses and doctors fuzzing over her before everything becomes dark. The last thing she thinks about is her baby, and Rafe.

“Lupita!” Rafe says, once he spots her. Her eyes dart to him, her mouth letting go of her thumb. Her lower lip quivering, her cheeks tear stained. But she looks relieved, almost.

“I’m such a coward. She needed me and I-I’m a coward.”

Sarah shakes her head, her arm linked with Rafe. Almost if she knew he needed someone to anchor him. His heart is racing, he’s not ready for what Lupita has to say. His eyes dart around the room, spotting people who are sick or injured. His stomach turning into knots.

“You’re queasy, it’s okay. It happens, that’s not your fault. You can’t blame yourself for that.”Sarah says, her hand on Lupita’s arm. Lupita smiles but it’s quick, her forehead crinkled with worry.

“What happened Lupita?” Rafe asks, almost desperately.

“Hi, are you the family member of Sofia Jimenez? Her cousin right?” A nurse says, interrupting Lupita before she can speak. Lupita nods rapidly, her eyes widening. Sarah instinctively holds her hand in hers. He doesn’t miss the way Lupita looks at Sarah

“The baby is in the NICU.” She starts, “we’re just trying to monitor her heart, her oxygen, her temperature. Make sure her vitals are okay. Everything is looking good, there doesn’t seem to be a major issue.” Lupita nods, Rafe brows furrow.

“What about Sofia?” He asks, the nurse turns to him.

“Uh family of hers?”

“Yes. Father of the baby.”

The nurse purses her lips before nodding. “Come with me.”

Rafe heart continues to beat fast, he’s in the scrubs the nurse had given him. He looks over at Sarah who gives him a reassuring smile. It’s the only thing that anchors him before deciding to walk into the room. His eyes see all the other babies in their incubators. He’s the only one allowed in. Sarah and Lupita wait by the window.

Rafe slowly approaches, his steps cautious. He notices her, her wavy hair behind her, her eyes staring at their baby.

“Sofia.” Rafe says hoarsely, as if he’s using his voice for the very first time. She turns, her eyes glassy.

“She’s okay—I thought—she’s okay…” Her lower lip wobbles and Rafe immediately wraps her into a hug, their scrubs rustling against each others. His tears slipping into her hair, as he holds her even closer.

“You’re both okay, you’re—I’m sorry I wasn’t there Sof.” He voice cracks, his hand smoothly down her hair.

“It’s not your fault.” She whispers. “She was ready to see us, I guess.” She chuckles softly. Rafe kisses her head, a few times. Before loosing his hold on her.

“Yeah, but had I just—”

“Look, you’ve made your mistakes in the past. This isn’t one of them. We didn’t know she decided today was the day she wanted to be born. This isn’t your fault, okay.”

They both turn to peer at Aurora.

“She’s so small…”Sofia wipes at her nose, “They’re just going to keep her here for a few days. Just to make sure everything is okay. But uh—” Sofia approaches Aurora’s incubator. “Isn’t she beautiful?”

Rafe neared the incubator, his eyes stared at their baby. The way her body was so small, too small. Her feet, her hands. But still, she was the most beautiful little baby he’d ever seen. And he was never one keen to babies. Rafe looked towards Sofia.

“She gets that from you.” Sofia cheeks flush and Rafe can’t help but smile. “She gets that from her mommy.”

Their eyes turn towards Aurora. Tiny little Aurora who was ready to see the world. To see them. His eyes land on the paper tucked near her incubator. Her name, and her weight on the chart. 4 pounds.

“How did the hearing go?” Sofia says, her eyes landing on his once more.

“We uh got joint custody.” Rafe says, his hand reaching in the incubator to touch Aurora. The nurse had provided him with gloves, but he needed to know she was real. Her little hand going into his, the way she curled them up.

“That’s amazing Rafe.” Rafe eyes meet hers again, he can’t help but go from looking at Aurora to looking at Sofia.

“Yeah, I finally got my little sister back.” His eyes bore into hers. “And now I have you too…”

Sofia reaches her hand in as while, her hand covering his. “You’ll always have us too.”

They kiss, a soft peck on the lips. A smile spreads on Rafe’s face.

“I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

“We want to monitor you as well for the night.” The nurse says, as Sofia is placed back onto the bed.

“She’ll be discharged in the morning?” Rafe asks, trying to leave his desperation out of his voice. Sofia seemed to pick up on it, as she beamed at him.

“Yes, that’s what we’re aiming for. If any other complications present themselves. It might be later than that. But I don’t think we have to worry about that. Everything seems normal.” The nurse says, helping Sofia adjust herself.

“I’ll give you two some more privacy.” The nurse excuses herself.

“Are Lupita and Sarah coming in?” Sofia asks, staring up at Rafe from the bed.

“Sarah went to help Lupita calm down.” Rafe grabs for her hand, holding it against his heart. “You scared us, you know.”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry. I-”

Rafe shook his head, squeezing her hand.

“It’s not your fault, she was ready to come out.”

“Rafe…” Sofia words become quiet, almost like she’s afraid about what she’s about to say.

“Yeah?”

“What if, something’s wrong with her? And they’re not telling us everything so we don’t freak out.” Sofia forehead crinkles with worry, Rafe rubs his thumb against her forehead, almost trying to smooth down the lines.

“If there was an issue, they would have told us by now.” Rafe pushes her hair out of her face, her brows crinkle.

“I’m sorry.”

It’s his turn for his eyebrows to crinkle.

“For what?”

“I know this isn’t how you wanted this to go.” Sofia eyes him cautiously, almost afraid that he’s mad at her. “I’m sorry I messed it up.”

“So it’s not my fault for not being here. But it’s yours for her coming out to early. Sofia, you don’t need to be so har—”

“I keep messing everything up for you. First the Hollis and Groff situation. Now this—”

“Sofia they’re not even remotely the same.” Rafe brows furrowed, he looks visibly confused.

“I just feel like I’m ruining—”

“Sofia, stop. Okay stop. That’s not what happened.”

Tears began to well up in her eyes. “What if we lose her and it’s—”

“Sofia stop!”

Sofia looks at him in shock, she looks around but knows no one heard him. They were in a private hospital room.

“I didn’t mean to yell.” He whispers, moving away from her. His back towards her. “I’m sorry.”

There’s a moment of silence, Sofia watching as he stands near the window. His body tense, he doesn’t speak.

“No it’s fine.”

“It’s not fine Sofia.” Rafe squeezed his eyes closed, his body positioned towards the window. “Look, our relationship has never been perfect. But you don’t get to start blaming yourself for everything now.”

Sofia eyes stay on his fighter, unsure what to say. She hadn’t meant to upset him. She just meant to share her fears with him. “Rafe—”

“All of that shit, it’s in the past Sofia. We just had a baby. Together. You and me. That’s what’s important. Okay. Our love for each other and our baby.”

“You can’t expect me to think you’ve forgiven me that fast.” Sofia brows knit together, her lips parting almost wanting to say more. Before ultimately deciding against it.

“You don’t get it Sofia, do you?” Rafe finally turns his head towards her. His eyes had softened. “Yeah, at first I was extremely angry. But now—”

“Now?”

“Now… all I want is you and Aurora. That’s all that matters to me. Sarah, little Jay and John B too. But don’t tell him that.” Sofia laughs. Rafe moves towards her once again. His hand gripping hers like a life line.

“You’re all I ever wanted and more.” He kisses her forehead.

“Hey sorry to interrupt. We wanted to check in with you guys. See that everything was okay.” Sarah says, Lupita looks at her cousin. Her face crumpling as she races towards her.

“Perdóname!” She says, her head on Sofias stomach. “I’m such a coward. I didn’t mean to leave you alone in that room.”

Sofia ran her hand in her cousin’s hair. “Lupita, Estoy bien, no te preocupes. Estoy aquí.” She kisses her cousins head.

Rafe and Sarah move to stand next to each other.

“But-but I just had to faint. I failed you.”

“Lupe, you could never fail me.” Lupita finally looks up from her cousins stomach.

“You’re not just saying that to make me feel better.”

“Lupe, I practically raised you. I know your heart and soul. I know you would have been there. You didn’t fail me.”

Lupita eyebrows scrunched up. “Te amo.”

“Te amo mas.”

Sofia raises her head to look toward Sarah and Rafe. As they privately have their own conversation. She can’t help the way her heart swells. She was surrounded by her family. New and old. She kisses her cousins head once more. Grateful for her and everyone who was in the room.

[angelasmooore]

rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!! rafia endgame?? rafia endgame!!

[angelasmooore]

parents rafe & sofia moodboard

and i can still see it all, in my mind. all of you, all of me, intertwined. i once believed love would be, black and white.

but it's golden, golden.

[angelasmooore]

Favourite Pairings (3/?) : Shawn and Angela (Boy Meets World)

For mine is a love no experience, no measure, no words, could ever degrade into reality by virtue of degree.

[angelasmooore]

so hot

❝ love language, r. cameron ❞

ooo. 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈… rafe cameron & sofia

ooo. 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔… spanish kink, praising, kissing, penetrative sex, unprotected sex.

ooo. 𝒔𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔… rafe loves hearing how vocal sofia is during sex, but what turns him on more than anything? hearing her speak in spanish while he’s fucking her.

ooo. 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔… this came out of my own filthy imagination, but there’s no doubt in my mind that hearing her speak in spanish would have him cuming almost immediately. all translations are from google so apologies if anything is incorrect.

“Oh! te sientes tan bien,” Sofia murmurs, her eyes roll to the back of her head as he deepened his penetration; altering the angle of his working hips so that the tip of his cock’s pressed so deep against her cervix that she nearly feels him in her belly.

Tears gather in her eyes and she bites down on her lower lip, overwhelmed by the pleasure. Rafe groans, deep and guttural against her throat, his eyes lower in lust as he continued the undulating movements of his hips. “Fuck, Sof,” He whimpers, lifting his head up so that he’s able to brush a chaste kiss over her kiss-swollen lips. “I’m gonna cum if you keep doing that,”

He always loved hearing how vocal she is during sex; but hearing her speak in Spanish was his weakness. They’ve been together long enough for him to pick up a few words and phrases (más profundo, más rápido, estoy cerca) and anything he didn’t understand he was usually able to decipher from gauging Sofia’s facial expressions or the tonality of her praises.

He loved seeing her like this—stretched and full of him with her body welcoming his onslaught, her skin flushed and slick with sweat and a mixture of both of their body fluids, her hair pooled around the satin bedsheets like a halo, her gaze seductive and unwavering, and her cunt clenching around him so wantonly. It was enough to have Rafe edging at his precipice.

Sofia brushes her hand against his neck, teasing soft pecks against his lips. “Hazlo,” She avers, nodding her head encouragingly, “quiero sentirlo dentro de mi.” Rafe whimpers again, feeling his cock lurch at her pleads.

He draws himself slower and deeper; precise with the fluidity of his movements, to where it’s a slow grind of him chafing against her. In and out, in and out. The noisiness of their sex as their sweaty bodies grind against each other’s ricochet throughout the room.

She ruts her pelvis against his; emphasizing the rotation of her hips and squeezing her thighs together to milk him of everything he’s got. It’s almost too much for her—the pleasure of him and the way his cock curls inside of her and hits her g-spot unrelentingly like he’s made just for her.

Rafe turns his head and kisses her again, sliding his tongue over the cusp of her lip causing her to part her mouth open. The angle wasn’t the best and she was mostly kissing his chin instead of his lips, but they maintain their position too enraptured in their bliss.

“Right there!” Sofia cries in pleasure when he thrusts into her swiftly and lingered there for a bit. He felt her flutter tightly around his cock at the movement.

“Yeah?”

“Again!” She nods, tossing her head back when he mimicked the move again, this time increasing the pleasure by pressing his thumb against her clit. “Oh my God,”

“Let go for me, Sof. Come on.” He urges desperate to get her to her release first, inwardly begging his cock not to give in before she’s fully satiated. “That’s it. Just like that.” He draws a prolonged stroke, lifting himself off of her. He pulls her working hips further up in the air before sliding into her with one long stroke that has pleasure licking up both of their spines.

“Rafe!” She chokes on a sob.

He pushes a hand down on her stomach, feeling the girth of himself curled and pressed just past the hilt of her cervix. He marvels at the sight of how she takes all eight inches of him without hesitation, at how full he feels being inside of her. It’s such a lewd but pretty sight; his cock slipping out and reclaiming her in and out, in and out with the juices of her arousal drenching his cock every time he withdraws from the tightness of her of her swollen pussy.

And Sofia swears she can feel him get bigger inside her from that alone, because he inhales sharply before dutifully fucking into her g-spot again. She’s biting back screams of pleasure, writhing underneath him and letting out small, broken noises as all inhibitions are lost.

He brushes his thumb over the sensitive flesh of her cunt again and that’s all it takes before she’s clenching and writhing beneath him as her release spills out of her in messy spurts. He continued to fuck her through her aftershocks, milking her completely dry until she goes boneless. The headboard knocks against the wall, leaving indention marks into the dry paint as he continuously fucks her into the mattress.

“tu turno cariño,” She purrs coquettishly and any restraint that Rafe had soon dissipates as she continued whispering those sweet nothings in his ears. “Es eso, cariño. Se siente tan bien.”

He breathes ruggedly in her ear, relenting his grip on her stomach to steady his large hands on the curve of her hips, now focusing on chasing his own pleasure. “Puedo sentir lo cerca que estás.” She whispers in his ear and it’s not long before his cock squeezes and lurches, his toes curl and body shivers at the pleasure that surfaces. Rivulets of his cum spill hotly inside of her, mixing in with the remnants of her own messy arousal.

Rafe groans, his body goes lax as he cums and falls helplessly onto Sofia. “Fuckin’ hell. You’re going to be the death of me one day,” He murmurs against her skin. She giggles, rubbing a hand against his back as she kissed his sweaty forehead.

“You’d love that wouldn’t you?”

[angelasmooore]

❝ midnight snack, r. cameron ❞

ooo. 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈… rafe cameron & sofia

ooo. 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔… cunnilingus, praise, kissing, squirting, sexting, orgasms.

ooo. 𝒔𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔… sofia’s home alone when she receives a text message from rafe while he’s out with friends that leaves her wet and anxiously waiting for his return home.

ooo. 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔… saw someone post a screen shot of rafe saying this and i knew that i had to write this for rafia.

Her cheek’s pooled with warmth as she read his message. In the two years that they’ve been dating, she’s gotten accustomed to Rafe’s lewdness and his sexual prowess.

It was antithetical of how she previously used to be—more reserved and shy regarding the approach, but now she’s become openly expressive in her sexuality—all kudos goes to Rafe who encouraged her every time, assuring her that he wanted to hear those filthy moans and noises that she used to purse her lips in attempts to stifle from him and that he enjoyed the burn of her fingers seeking refuge in his hair that she would tug on whenever she was on the precipice of cuming.

He wasn’t hesitant on letting Sofia know when he wanted her; like now even when he was supposed to be out catching up with a group of friends of his from college, he was texting her already divulging in explicit details of their pending reconciliation. And Sofia felt her body respond instinctively, her cunt throbs wantonly at the thought of Rafe’s head buried between her thighs while he ate her out.

Sofia hearts his message, avidly anticipating what’s to come.

She then sets her phone aside so that she’s able to reach underneath the hem of the oversized shirt that she’s wearing and grabs at the ends of her underwear. She lifts her body up and tugs the laced material over her hips and down her legs until the underwear is bunched up around her ankles. She absentmindedly tosses them aside somewhere on the carpeted floors of their bedroom.

She reaches over towards the nightstand and grabs ahold of her book; deciding to read until Rafe returned home to fulfill his promise.

…

She doesn’t even remember falling asleep, but it’s the sound of someone’s gait that has Sofia stirring awake later that night. “Rafe?” She murmurs drowsily, rubbing a hand over her bleary, heavy lidded eyes as she sits upright in the bed.

“Yeah, it’s me,” He says, his voice a soft whisper into the darkness of the room. She reaches over and turns on the lamp’s light to see him standing athwart from her, doffing out of his clothing. “Sorry, we stayed out a little later than planned,” He laments apologetically as he reached down to the hem of his shirt and tugged it over his head until he’s left shirtless.

Sofia’s eyes avert to the clock on the nightstand; noticing that it was just a little past one thirty in the morning. “It’s okay. Did you guys have fun?” She questions, bookmarking the page that she’d left off on before setting it onto the surface of the nightstand.

Rafe nods, “Yeah, everyone was surprised to hear that I’d gotten engaged.” He chuckles, thumbing his fingers in the waistband of his pants as he lowers them over his thighs and legs. “They made me promise to bring you along next time. They want to meet the woman that made me an honest man,” He teases, stepping out of the jeans before he begins to stalk towards her. Sofia shakes her head in amusement as she watched him lower onto the bed.

He digs a knee onto the mattress, reaching a hand out to brush along her calf. “Did you do like I asked?” He murmurs, setting his other knee on the bed as he crawled up to her.

Sofia bit on her lower lip as she looked at him; his eyes were lowered in lust, nostrils were flared as he laid down and leveled himself so that his face was nestled in the crux of her legs as he inhaled the saccharine scent of her arousal. His tongue slicked over his lower lip as he salivated at the thought of finally being able to taste her again.

Sofia nods her head, harrowing the heels of her feet firmly on the mattress as she spreads her legs open for Rafe’s view.

“Jesus, Sof,” He coos softly, mesmerized at the visual of how wet she is. “Fuck. I can’t wait to taste you. I thought about it all night,” He brushes his fingers through the trimmed curls of her pubic hair, dragging his nails across the sensitive skin of her mound as he blows softly on her exposed folds.

“Rafe!” She whimpers, thrusting her hips towards his face in an unmistakable gesture for him to do something—anything.

He brushes soft kisses against the inside of her thighs, tugging the hem of her shirt over her hips so that there isn’t a barrier of clothing intercepting his path. His hand glides over her calf as he hefts her left leg over his shoulder. As he’s allotting himself further between her thighs, the bridge of his nose inadvertently brushes against her clit — it’s just the barest of contact but it still implements enough stimulation to where she’s whimpering again and arching her hips closer to his mouth. “Baby!” The reprimanding plead falls airily off of her lips, but he’s already leveling her right leg over his shoulder and digging his fingers into her thighs.

Then finally, finally, his tongue’s inside of her, lapping her slicked folds in one smooth drag.

Sofia chokes on a sob that catches in the back of her throat.

“Ya estoy tan cerca,” She whimpers, rolling her hips closer to Rafe’s face as the stimulation heightens. She pushes his face closer into her cunt, nearly suffocating him in her wanton heat. Rafe, spurred on by her keens, hastens his efforts of getting her to cum. He’s ravenous in his onslaught; slicking his lips with saliva and some of her arousal as he puckered his mouth.

He suctions her clit in and out; stretching his jaw at the unrelenting movements as he sucked and released the pressure until he feels her legs tighten around his head and hears another curse falls off of her lips. “Cum for me, Sof.” He murmurs, using one of his fingers to massage her cunt, penetrating her just enough until he’s pressed against her g-spot. “That’s it, baby, you’re doing so good,”

“Rafe, I’m—” She could feel it festering inside of her, curling in her toes, tugging in her abdomen as he continued his ministrations. “I think I might—” Her sentences are incoherent because she’s too indulged at how good he’s eating her out and it’s almost too much for her to bear or think about anything else other than his fellacious feat.

But Rafe seemingly understands her fragmented forewarnings as he nods his head in encouragement. “I know, baby. It’s okay.”

Sofia bellows out a loud cry as a shiver lick up her spine. She feels a wetness pool beneath her body and spill a bit on the sheets as she squirts.

She peered down at him; his lips were swollen and pink, glistening with his a mixture of his saliva and her orgasm that coated around his mouth. He looked debauched. His eyes were lidded and glossed with lust that reflected heavily in his pupils, his face was flushed and rosy, from where it was suffocated between the burning heat of her thighs. He crawls up her body to where he’s halfway sprawled out atop of her and nearly straddling her legs. He leans down and meets her for a kiss, allowing the lingering taste of her to pass and forth between their tongues.

“See how good you taste? This is why you’re my favorite snack to eat.”

[angelasmooore]

❝ the boy is mine, r. cameron. ❞

ooo. 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈… rafe cameron x sofia

ooo. 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔… infidelity, heavy angst, emotional cheating, mutual pining, brief sexual content, jealousy, internal conflict, brief mention of religion, unresolved emotional tension, unresolved sexual tension.

ooo. 𝒔𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔… where infidelity stumbles upon and complicates the lives of rafe and sofia.

ooo. 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔… wanted to try something completely different from how i usually write them lol. neither one of them are good people in this and i tried to make it where i didn’t justify their cheating too much.

he’s trying to stop.

because he knows that he should; his unabashed gawking wasn’t appropriate in this setting—not when there’s a room full of people (friends, family and his fiancé) whose suspicions could easily be aroused and their curiosities seemingly piqued to know why he was staring so intently at her.

and of course there’s the obvious answer, that she’s so beautiful that it’s nearly intimidating and hard not to fawn over a woman who is as alluring and effervescent as her. but then there’s the underlying answer; the truth that made him feel guilty every time he thought about it. his eyes stealthily peered at her over the rim of his wine filled glass; heeding at her demeanor and behavior. she’s only looked at him once since their arrival.

it was a casual glimpse where she briefly met his gaze for a few seconds then quickly averted her eyes elsewhere before sauntering off to the other side of the room. and he knows he shouldn’t be offended or so needy for her acknowledgment (nor did he deserve it) but he couldn’t help but crave her undivided attention.

it doesn’t help that she looks gorgeous tonight — wearing a hunter green dress that perfectly compliments her contrasting skin tone and lithe physique. the silky material is hiked just a few inches above her knees; showing the expansing length of her prowling legs. the straps cling off of her shoulders, displaying her sharp clavicle and slender neckline. her hair’s styled in its natural curls, the voluptuous tufts flow effortlessly down her back neat and coiffed.

and it’s almost like she could feel the smothering intensity of his gaze, because suddenly she’s turning her head to look in his direction. her eyes finds his almost instantly and it admittedly makes him a little giddy to think that there’s a possibility that she had been discreetly watching him all night too with how easily she finds him in a room that’s crowded with nearly a hundred other people.

but just as quickly as he gets her attention, he loses it when he looks past her and sees her boyfriend approaching from behind; sliding a hand over her waist as he leaned down to whisper something in her ear that had her smiling and giggling.

“there you are! i was wondering where you ran off to.” rafe sputters, nearly choking on his drink when he hears the familiar voice of his fiancé as she approached him from behind.

he hurriedly averts his eyes away from sofia and instead looks over at rachel; wondering if she’d stumbled upon him staring across the room at sofia. but from the way she doesn’t mention anything, it seems as if she’s completely oblivious:

he nods, holding up his glass. “i just went to get something to drink,” he shrugs, taking another gulp of his drink before discreetly looking around the room again.

rachel sighed softly, “you’ve been standing here sulking all night—” she laments in rebuttal causing rafe to recoil at her accusations that unfortunately held some truth. instead of gallivanting around the room and accompanying her in reciting mirthful stories of how he proposed and the future of their lives together, he was standing off in a secluded corner sneaking wayward glances at his ex girlfriend.

“i just—i don’t know what to say to anyone. these are all of your family and friends, not mine.” it’s the first honest thing he’s said to her all night; and it only makes his guilt worsen knowing that his feelings about the engagement aren’t reciprocated — that he isn’t as happy about it as she is. that instead of being filled with mirth about their future together, all he feels is dread aching in his bones and weighing down heavily on his chest.

rachel balances the glass of champagne that’s in her hand so that she’s able to wrap her arms around his neck. “i know you’re not good with all this,” she gestures a hand vaguely around the room where the other guests are standing around conversing amongst each other. “but, could you at least try? your sulking isn’t exactly ideal behavior of what a newly engaged man looks like,”

she’s right.

his avoidance of talking to her family is inadvertently making it seem like he’s being purposefully standoffish and desolate, which admittedly he kinda is, but he wasn’t supposed to show it. not when there’s a room full of observing eyes, gauging his reactions and movements, expecting him to behave antithetical of how he’s currently being.

and contrary to belief he has tried to be happy with rachel.

the trajectory of their relationship had been far from easy. there were so many times where he felt so emotionally drained and distant that he wasn’t sure there would ever be a point of reconciliation for them. arguments became frequent to the point where he’d sleep over at barry’s just to avoid going back home to her.

and ironically enough, while his relationship with rachel strained, he became seemingly closer to sofia — who he met one night while accompanying barry to a bar. they had come there with the sole intention of getting drunk to help rafe temporarily forget his relationship troubles. he never sought out to find someone else that night; let alone someone that he developed feelings for as quickly as he did with her.

it was hard to not be captivated by her. she was undoubtedly the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen and he knew he’d conceded to his temptation from the first moment that she looked at him; falling fast and pathetically for the woman with the the warm whiskey colored eyes that looked at him with a beguiling tease and a smile that made him weak in the knees.

their relationship started off innocent.

he made the first move; persevering through his trepidation and pushing through the gnawing guilt until it dissipated completely. it began with lighthearted conversations with them getting to know a little about each other — where they worked, if they had any siblings, where they grew up. it felt easy just talking to her in a way that it hadn’t been with rachel in months and rafe found himself liking the comfortability that he quickly fell into with her.

they ended up talking for that whole night until she informed him that she had to leave because she needed to be up early for work the next morning. rafe went back to barry’s that night worrying that would be the last time he would see sofia; feeling wistful over the conversation and connection that had developed between them in those two hours they spent talking. he was surprised to return to the bar the next night to see her sitting in her same seat; with a drink in hand waiting for him.

and rafe doesn’t know how it was possible, but she looked even more beautiful the second night than she did on the first and it was so distracting that he found himself listening halfheartedly through their conversations.

the bar became their frequent meet up spot on thursdays and friday’s after work. through the rest of the week he would impatiently await for the days arrival, anxious and avid to see and be in proximity of her again. through the passing weeks, they added wednesday to their schedule — concluding that two days a week just wasn’t enough for either of them.

it was little idiosyncrasies about sofia that rafe adored. like her laughter; the sound always fell off of her lips like a melodic hymn, soft and breathy. it was an expression of joy and serenity that reflected on her face — always visible in her warm eyes and in the way her face changed into that vision of relaxed joy and unrestrained mirth. he loved how the corners of her lips always curled involuntarily — and how she would try to fight back hard as her cheeks swelled momentarily with the pressure — but to no avail before guffawing loudly (or to her chagrin snorting) in hilarity.

or her big, doe brown eyes that flickered with purity and innocence and fleeted with warmth that brimmed around the edges of her irises, making him feel smothered underneath the softness of her stare every time she looked at him. their flirtation became less discreet and more overt as weeks passed on; he wouldn’t hesitate to call her beautiful whenever he saw her, or rest a hand on the small of her back whenever he walked her to her car or let his eyes linger on her lips whenever she talked.

their first kiss happened one night after he walked her to her car. his hand stretched against her backside, gently guiding her down the cracked sidewalk. they come to a stop when they reached her car that was parked along the street’s curb. “i’ll see you wednesday?” he asked, sliding his hand from its perch, mourning the fact that he had to go five days without seeing her again.

she nodded, looking as solemn as he felt about their separation.

he hated the interval days of the in between, of being away from sofia when all he did was crave her attention and affection. she filled the void of his loneliness, substituting it with something unexpected but that he’s grown to cherish more than anything.

he didn’t want to leave her or the feeling of content that he felt when he was around her. and from the way she was still standing there staring, making no efforts in moving yet he can tell that she didn’t want the night to end either.

“sof…” he murmured when he saw her leaning forward.

and before he realized it; her lips were pressed against his cheek imprinting a small kiss there. his breath hitched a bit and he swallowed when she pulled back and lingered over his mouth for a second. rafe paused, looking up again when he felt the coolness of sofia’s breath brushing against his skin again.

his tongue lapped over his lower lip as he shifted his eyes between sofia’s lips and eyes — it’s an unasked question, the way he nudges closer, his mouth parting as he stared up at her. he’s hesitant as he begins to close the remainder of space that’s left between them, watching, waiting for sofia to reject him. to pull or push him away. to tell him that this was a mistake and that they shouldn’t do this. and when she doesn’t; rafe uses that as an invitation to lean forward.

“can i—”

“yes.” she answered soft and breathily, reflecting the same avidity as him.

rafe leaned closer, invading her space.

he brushed his mouth softly against hers, just the barest mesh of lips on lips. it was timid. kind of shy and chaste. he pressed his mouth against sofia’s and puckered his lips, softly nipping her top lip within his own.

he brought a hand up, brushing it against the back of her neck as he tugged her closer towards him. she whimpered softly, reciprocating the fervor of emotion that he poured into the kisses. rafe slacked his jaw and sucked diligently on the plush flesh of her lower lip until it swelled. he released it with a loud wet pop, opening his eyes as he looked down at sofia who looked equally as dazed as he felt.

their first time making love was something that he would always remember. it was gentle and unhurried and he held her with such a delicacy that it almost it feel fragile and sacred. he offered her soft reassurances the entire time, asking what was okay for her and gauged her reaction to see what she did/didn’t like. his fingers, long and agile squeezed her hips as he held her, choking on a groan as when he stretched her — breaching inside of her inch by inch until she was full of him. her fingernails indented in his skin; decorating his back and shoulders with red scratches. her hands pulled at the tufts of his hair, anchoring him closer.

he relished in the tremors of her body as she hovered atop of him; how she reverberated against him whenever her cunt tugged in response, clenching wantonly around his cock. when she came with a high keen — her face scrunched up in pleasure, mouth hung agape, back arched into his touch and fingers bit roughly into his skin. it was a sound that rafe permanently instilled in his brain, one that he would remember forever.

he slept over at her house that night, feeding rachel another lie that he was staying over at barry’s, while he was laid in between sofia’s sheets, holding her sweat slick body against his.

retracting from his deep reverie, rafe nods, scratching a hand over his brow. “yeah, i know. i’m—” but the remainder of his sentence is left unsaid, because he’s suddenly aghast and distracted when he looks up and sees sofia and her boyfriend approaching.

he’s a little bewildered, trying to reign in the incredulity on his face as they walked hand in hand. his eyes fleet back and forth between the two of them; lingering a bit on sofia as he breathed in her features again, attempting, albeit futile, to not get distracted by her beauty. he’s staring again, he soon realizes, and he shakes his head and harrumphs softly to retract himself (and his attention) back on his fiancé.

at his sudden change in demeanor, rachel turns around to see what had distracted rafe from his thoughts. he could tell that she’s equally as surprised by their approach as he is.

“we just wanted to say congratulations on the engagement,” sofia’s boyfriend, jason, proclaims. his hand slides up and rests on sofia’s waist. rafe’s eyes narrow only slightly before he’s looking away again, clenching his jaw.

“oh,” rachel smiles, before turning towards rafe as her hand rested on his forearm. “thanks and thank you for coming,”

rafe didn’t think they would come at all considering sofia made it abundantly clear about the nature of their demised relationship. it left him despondent, knowing that the person that he found solace the most in couldn’t even stomach the thought of being around him anymore. he still tries to catch her gaze again even if it’s just for a brief second. but it seemed as if she would rather look at rachel than at him.

“we’re about to leave; i got a flight to catch early tomorrow morning but congratulations,”

rachel nods in understanding, waving the issue off in good nature. “yeah, no, i get it. have a nice night.”

“yeah, you too.”

jason guides sofia along with his hand rested at the small of her back, until they’ve maneuvered through the crowd and are by the exit. once they’ve disappeared through the doubled doors, rachel turns back to rafe and gives him a weary look as she runs a hand through her hair. “well that awkward. i didn’t think he’d actually come,”

“yeah, me either.” rafe murmurs, looking towards the exit where sofia and jason had just vacated through.

“anyway, my dad wants to speak you. said he wants to have a talk man-to-man,” she smiles, “come on, he’s waiting,”

rafe gently tugs his arm free from her grasp, watching as her smile immediately substituted for a dejected frown. “i need a minute, okay?”

“rafe,” she sighed frustratedly, folding her arms against his chest as she gave him an exasperated look. “what’s the matter with you? you’ve been avoiding me and my family all night, and you look miserable. people are starting to talk! she whispered, keeping her voice low as she accosted him for his aloof behavior.

“nothing’s wrong, i just—” didn’t want talk about the engagement, didn’t want to stand here pretending that he was happy anymore, felt guilt-ridden about his conflicted feelings for her, felt jealous about seeing sofia with another guy, “i need some air.”

“fine, go.” rachel sighs again as she looked around wearily, “come back when you’re ready to start acting like you’re happy to be with me.”

he sets his half empty glass onto the countertop before walking out into the hallway and slipping out of one of the side doors. as he steps out into the brisk autumn air, he’s taken aback when he sees sofia already standing there. he pauses almost hesitantly, watching as she turned around at the sound of his approaching gait. she gives him an indescribable look; holding his gaze briefly before she’s turning her back towards him again.

“thought you’d left,” he says, now slowly sauntering over to where she stood. he stands beside her, shoving his hands in the pockets of his slacks. his eyes linger on her, taking in her beauty and just being so close to her again like this was reverting him back into memories that never really faded.

“we were about to, but jason got pulled aside by some people wanting to talk business. so i decided to wait out here instead.” she shrugged. silence hangs in the air briefly, until she says, “that was a nice party. your fiancé seems nice,” and there’s something hidden in the undertones of her remark when she refers to rachel as his fiancé that elicits unwarranted frustration from him.

“you’re unbelievable, you know that?”

she furrows her brows, finally turning her head to look at him. “what’s your issue?” she reprimands, so painfully oblivious to his feelings. how could she stand here and attempt casual conversation with him about rachel while ignoring their own unresolved issues in their relationship?

it’s been six months since he’s last seen her. six months since she abruptly broke up with him, offering him nothing but a trivial excuse that she couldn’t see him anymore. and now, when he finally sees her again, after all those months of still pining after her, she comes to his engagement party and pretends like nothing happened? he didn’t understand how she could be so cavalier about their relationship; like what they had wasn’t special. like he meant nothing to her anymore.

“my issue is you.”

“me?” she scoffs, folding her arms against her chest as she narrowed her gaze on him.

he nods, unfurling all of his pent up emotions that he kept dormant, onto her. “i don’t see or hear anything from you in months, and the first time that i do, i have to see another guy’s hand on your ass! why did you even come today, huh? just wanted to make sure i saw that you moved on to someone else?”

she recoils at his abrasive tone, “oh, please! don’t give me that rafe! your fiancé invited jason. it’s not my fault that he just so happens to be her boss and she’s so busy trying to kiss his ass to get a promotion! and if anyone’s trying to prove something it’s you! you’re the one that proposed to her—”

“i only proposed to her because you left me!” he confesses. it was a horrible thing to admit but it was the truth.

he proposed to rachel under false pretenses; placating a facade of happiness when in reality he was using her to attempt to mend his own broken heart. he was lonely, confused, and thought that if he could no longer be with sofia then there was no harm in trying to repair his relationship with her.

but through his attempts of reconciliation, he realized that he couldn’t fill the void of sofia’s absence and touch with rachel. the way she made him feel (and how he continues to feel) was something he hadn’t experienced before. it extended beyond lust, what he felt was real and he knew that it couldn’t be reciprocated with anyone else despite their efforts. but he tried for her, masquerading his despondent feelings and playing into her fairytale that they were a happy couple again.

sofia shakes her head, “uh uh. don’t do that. don’t try to blame this on me. you’re the one who didn’t know what you wanted, rafe!” she brushes past him, attempting to walk away.

but rafe intercepts her path when he steps forward and catches her by the wrist, feeling her pulse quicken beneath his fingers. “i want you. i’ve always wanted you, sof. i love you,” he murmurs, defiant in his sentiment. he feels a naive hopefulness swelling in his chest when her face visibly softens at his proclamation.

but then she’s shaking her head again, reluctantly retracting from his embrace. “stop, okay. it’s too late.”

“sofia,”

“do you think that this is easy for me, rafe?”she chuckles wryly, pursing her lips as she sniffled lowly. “you think that all of my feelings just suddenly went away? no. but i know that none of that matters anymore. what we had was doomed from the start and we should’ve realized that sooner.”

rafe recoils, affronted and pained by her dismissal of importance regarding their relationship. “that’s how you feel? like what like us being together was a mistake or something?”

“the mistake was me thinking that this could’ve ever been something real.”

“it is real,” rafe rebuttals, stepping in front of her again as he blocked the pathway to the door. “when this first started i was in a fucked up place in my relationship with rachel, okay? i found out that she cheated on me. our parents were friends and we grew up together, we had history. we’d been dating since college. and even though she hurt me, i didn’t break up with her because i still loved her. it wasn’t easy. i felt betrayed and hurt but i couldn’t help how i still felt about her. the night that we met; i didn’t expect to fall in love with you. i just came there to get my mind off of all the shit i was going through at home but then i saw you and everything changed.”

even with the possibility of her chastising him of touching her or her pushing him away, that doesn’t dissuade him from moving closer towards her. the of tension hangs between them; thick and palpable, wrapping around them like a weighted blanket.

rafe’s fingers twitch again this thigh, desperate to touch and hold her. to brush his thumb over the swell of her pouted lower lip and pull her into a kiss to make her forget about their strifes. all he wants is her. and he knows that he’d probably ruined his chance to prove it.

“i love you, sofia. i know that it isn’t fair for me to say this but i can’t help how i feel. i’ve been miserable without you baby,”

“rafe—” she sighs, contemplative and resigned. he reaches a hand up and holds her face within his grasp, thumbing away her tears that lined in her pupils.

he feels her chin tremble against his palm and all reserve that she once, had suddenly begins to fall. “sof,” he murmurs, holding the weight of her stare as she looked up at him through the glossiness of her vision.

their faces are only inches apart. their noses just a breadth away. he could feel the wisps of her breath fanning against his cheeks from the closeness of proximity. his lips part as his eyes lower to her mouth.

he could see the contemplation furrow in her brows, how she instinctively leans closer and decimates the space between them until the bridge of his nose brushes against hers.

rafe leans forward and brushes his lips against hers. it’s a gentle peck with his top lip capturing hers. she melts at the softness and the intimacy that lingers behind it despite herself — immediately succumbing to the familiarity and vigor that’s implemented in the kiss. he chases after her lips, savoring in the taste of her; swallowing down the taste of chianti that sat on her tongue.

she has no sense of control; not when it comes to rafe. the moment he kisses her — insistent and needy, full of tongue and vehemence, she succumbs and completely disregards all rationality. she’s breathless, in that familiar way she always is whenever he kisses her, her lungs contract in forewarning as they beg her to momentarily part for air and her lips are so swollen that they’re nearly numb. but it’s been months since she’s kissed him and she’d be damned if she’s deprived of him for another second. when rafe slacks his jaw and deepens the kiss, she feels her knees nearly buckle beneath her and she has to wrap her arms around his heightened neck to keep herself from toppling over.

his hands are everywhere — groping and fondling every visible inch of skin that his hands could reach before slipping between the fabric of her dress, brushing against her thighs. “r-rafe,” she whimpers, breaths coming out in soft pleas against his lips.

she knows it’s wrong, she’s spent months conflicted and debating her own morality about their infidelity, questioning how she could knowingly take someone else’s companion as her own.

she grew up catholic; raised with strict religious beliefs about family and relationships and about the scarcity that comes along with it. yet, here she was committing the most scandalous sin and combatting against her own beliefs for just another taste of rafe’s forbidden fruit. she laughs at her own hypocrisy, at how months ago she promised herself she would stay away. but she strayed towards temptation like she always does with rafe.

and despite knowing that they shouldn’t be doing this, she kisses him deeper, moaning softly at the way his hands tighten their hold on her waist as if he was afraid to let her go. she leaves the ambiguity of their relationship unasked; she doesn’t contemplate what’s going to happen afterwards or what will be different this time around. she’s too afraid of the answer. she hopes that his love for her would be enough but the solemn reminder that he wasn’t hers tortures her with every bruised kiss that he pecks against her mouth.

she disregards the fact that jason’s inside, probably nearing the end of his conversation so that he can come look for her, she ignores the fact that there’s a ballroom full of rachel’s family and friends only a few feet away, all celebrating amongst themselves while he’s got his fingers knuckle deep in her cunt and his tongue shoved down her throat.

she should feel more guilt ridden and ashamed about this. but it’s hard to feel any remorse when he makes her feel this good

[angelasmooore]

PLEASE dad Rafe, where Sofia is like a Pilates mom trophy wife and she and Rafe have kids and UGHHHHHHHHHH traditional rich family like Rafe would have. Maybe a little bit of angst with some kids telling the kids things like "your mom was a Pogue" that they heard from their moms or whatever.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ family

{summary: rafe and sofia are now married with two kids, both trying to navigate the tricky waters of parenthood}

{a/n: i’m sorry this took so long but i hope you enjoy it!}

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Rafe never thought he’d be able to have this. Someone like him blessed with something so pure?

The house was filled with noise. Gone were the silent, eerie hallways of Tannyhill, haunted by the memory of a broken family and cursed reputation. Rafe had forged his own home– made a new family.

And he had Sofia to thank for that. Her laughter bounced off the walls, a sound he’d happily get drunk off of. But it wasn’t just her voice in the medley. Bright, chirping babbles, the patter of little footsteps…

“Daddy!” A little voice called out.

Rafe was in his bedroom, buttoning up his shirt, ready to head out to the office, when the door swung open, revealing his little daughter waddling inside.

“Hey baby aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for school?” He cooed, going to pick her up.

Sofia entered a moment later, still wrapped in her dressing gown, “sorry, she’s being a real nightmare today, aren’t you, chiquita?” Sofia said, with a faux, playful anger.

“Don’t you have your Pilates thing this morning?” Rafe asked, after pressing a quick kiss against Sofia’s cheek.

“I do, let’s see if I make it,” she huffed, taking their daughter into her arms. “¿Estás vestido?” She called out to their oldest. (She was trying to teach him Spanish).

“Yes mom!” He yelled back from his room across the landing, in that exasperated tone befitting of a pre-teen.

After Rafe and Sofia got married, she quickly became pregnant. It wasn’t planned, the whole ordeal both exciting and terrifying. The couple were graced a beautiful baby boy, the spitting image of Rafe, who they named Leo.

Seven years later, and they were once again blessed, this time with a daughter, Eliza, who was now a boisterous five year old, starting kindergarten.

Rafe and Sofia remained in the Outer Banks, despite Rafe’s desires to leave. Sofia wanted to stay close to her family, and have the children’s grandparents nearby. Leo and Eliza also loved to spend time with their cousins, Valerie and JJ (John B and Sarah’s kids,) who lived where the old Chateau used to be– a new development spearheaded by Rafe, being built there as a gift to his sister.

So they stayed on the little island of Kildare, Rafe forsaking his tumultuous past for the sake of his family.

His family.

He still couldn’t quite believe it even after more than a decade.

“You get ready for your class, I’ll drop the kids off, yeah?” He suggested, noticing Sofia’s increasingly worried expression.

“But then you’ll be late,” her mouth pulled into a stark frowned as she held Eliza on her hip.

“You can’t be late when you’re the boss,” Rafe smirked, to which Sofia rolled her eyes playfully.

“Listen to your father now ok baby?” Sofia warned, giving Eliza to Rafe.

“We’ll be fine, won’t we?” Rafe grinned down at Eliza, ruffling his daughter hair. She’d inherited her mother’s chestnut curls, hazel eyes, and wide, sunny smile that lit up any room she waddled into.

Rafe left Sofia in the bedroom so she could change, heading to his son’s room.

“You ready kiddo?” He called rapping his knuckles on the door.

Leo exited a moment later, “where’s mom?” He asked.

“She’s got Pilates on this morning, so I’m taking you and Eliza to school.”

Leo was just about to turn thirteen, evident in his moody, brooding demeanour. Sofia often told Rafe not to worry, that it was normal. But Rafe couldn’t help but see himself in his son. He remembered how he was like at that age– alone, misunderstood. He’d hate for Leo to feel the same.

“Go grab you and your sister’s backpacks bud and I’ll meet you by the truck.”

The three of them all headed downstairs, Leo grabbing the school bags, Eliza slipping on her shoes and Rafe grabbing the car keys.

Just as they were about to all head out, the front door wide open, Sofia came down the stairs, looking like a vision in her skin tight workout gear.

Fuck. Even after fourteen years, Rafe was smitten.

“Leaving without saying goodbye?” She teased, approaching them with a glorious smile. Sofia knelt down, pressing Eliza’s face with kisses.

“Come here Leo, you too,” she teased, bundling him up in a hug.

She stood up, ruffling Leo’s hair with a playful touch. “Trabaja duro en la escuela, ¿vale?”

Leo rolled his eyes, “yes mom I will.”

“En español por favor,” Sofia chastised.

Leo rolled his eyes yet again, “Sí, lo haré.”

“Gracias, cariño. Now go, don’t want you to be late.”

Rafe gazed at this with a soft smile, his heart suffuse with an overflowing warmth.

“What– no kiss for me huh?” He probed, his eyes roving Sofia’s figure shamelessly.

“Ew dad, can you not?” Leo groused, grabbing his sisters hand and tugging her on to the porch.

Sofia and Rafe ignored his juvenile rumblings, Rafe’s hands sliding around her hips as he pulled her into a quick, firm kiss.

“Love you,” he said, softly.

“Te amo,” she replied with a sly grin, “now go before Leo throws up.”

“How does he think he ended up here huh?” Rafe joked, tightening his grip on her hips

“Oh shush, they’re gonna be late.”

So Rafe compiled, bucking Eliza into the car seat in the back, whilst Leo jumped up front.

“Wave bye to your mom,” he instructed, pulling out the driveway, as Sofia waited by the front door.

The early air was balmy and sweet, and, like he did every morning, Rafe thanked the higher powers above for the blessing which he had the fortune of calling his family.

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“Rafe, you have to come to the school now, Leo just got into a fight.” Sofia’s voice called from the other end of the phone line, her usually calm and breezy tone now panic-stricken.

Rafe left the office, heading down to the school district, his fingers tapping restlessly against the steering wheel.

He recalled getting into fights at Leo’s age, in some messed up plea for Ward’s attention. The sudden recollection of his own father sent chills through his terse body– he hadn’t thought about him in years. Sofia had put the spiralling introspection to rest, back when he had found about the pregnancy. Questions of his own imminent fatherhood had plagued him– the prospect of becoming like Ward Cameron, a man who he loved and hated all at the same time, the possibility of hurting his kids in the same way his father had hurt him. After nearly a decade, these poisonous insecurities returned with a corrosive force. They decimated the confines of his mind that he’d so carefully constructed to keep the thoughts at bay.

So lost in multiplying thoughts, Rafe was surprised at how fast he reached the school. The school was the kook academy, a playfully moniker from his youth. Sofia was hesitant to send them to a private school, but Rafe persisted, wanting his kids to have the best of the best.

Jumping out the truck, Rafe made a beeline for the reception, relieved to see Sofia’s car already parked there.

The receptionist led him round back to where the principal’s office was. Ms Wilson was already talking to Sofia and Leo when he entered, the conversation stilling to a halt at his arrival.

Sofia glanced around at Rafe, still dressed in her leggings and zip up jacket. Her brows were cinched, mouth caught in a small frown. She seemed more anxious than angry– unlike Rafe, who brewed with a silent rage.

“Mr Cameron, I’m glad you could join us,” the principal announced, inviting him to take a seat in the vacant chair.

He simply grunted in response.

“As I’ve informed Mrs Flores, Leo was involved with an altercation with another student at recess.”

“Altercation? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“Rafe, cálmate,” Sofia scolded.

“There’s no need for the expletives Mr Cameron. Leo punched another child and held him down– his teacher had to pull him off.”

“This true Leo?” Rafe looked down at his son, whose face was covered by long strands of dark blonde hair. He was silent, playing with the skin on his nails.

Rafe tensed his jaw. “I asked you a question kid.”

“Yes it’s true.” He mumbled in response.

“As per school policy, Leo is to face one week suspension. He’s usually exceptionally behaved, so I will reduce the time to only three days seeing as this was a one off thing.”

“Thank you Mrs Wilson, Leo is very sorry for what happened,”Sofia said in earnest.

Rafe glanced at Leo, who looked the opposite of apologetic. He instead saw the same firey, blue resolve in his son’s eyes that perturbed him. It was like looking in some twisted mirror, the reflection stark and undeniable.

“What did the other kid do to provoke him huh?” Rafe pushed, tapping his foot against the carpeted floors of the pristine office.

“The other child in question said the attack was unprovoked, and Leo is not disputing that.”

Rafe simply hummed in dissatisfaction. “Is that all then?”

“If you have no further questions, then you’re free to take Leo home,” Mrs Wilson looked between Leo and his father, warily.

“Thank you again,” Sofia simpered, picking up Leo’s bag for him.

“Come on,” Rafe muttered.

When the three of them left the school, Leo stuck by Sofia.

“I’ll drive him home, you can go back to work Rafe,” Sofia said, her hand reaching over to rest on Leo’s shoulder.

“No, we’re gonna have a serious talk about this, you understand Leo?”

He just looked at his father with those unblinking, blue eyes.

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Rafe reached home after Sofia and Leo, seeing the car already parked in the driveway. When he entered the house, he heard muffled voices come from the living room. But when he entered, the conversation between Sofia and Leo came to a standstill.

“You wanna explain why you were in fight huh?” Rafe began, shucking off his suit jacket. He didn’t mean for his voice to sound so loud, but he couldn’t help it.

Leo once again was silent. It was Sofia who spoke instead, “Rafe, control your temper–“

“Why don’t you tell that to our son?”

Sofia’s eyes were watery, as if she was about to cry, “stop it, Leo had his reasons.”

Rafe paused for a moment– what reason?

Sofia went and took a seat next to her son. “The other kid, he was saying things, making fun of Leo– that’s why he retaliated.”

Rafe’s face softened, extending his gaze towards his son, who sat motionless on the couch.

“What things?” Rafe asked, question directed to his wife.

But Sofia just shook her head, her dark hair falling into her eyes.

“What things were they saying kiddo?” Rafe approached his son, squatting down so they were eye level. Up close he could see the red rimming his eyes, as if he’d hastily wiped away the tears before Rafe had come in. The notion made Rafe’s heart sink.

Leo sniffed, darting his gaze away from his father. “Jared Richardson was going around saying I shouldn’t speak Spanish because that’s what housekeepers speak.”

“He said what? That little piece of shit.”

Leo’s gaze became darker, his pupils contracting, leaving only pure, distilled ice. “He also called mom a dirty pogue who came from the Cut. That’s when I punched him.”

Rafe’s rage multiplied, his molars pressing tightly against each other, the sound of grinding bone filling his ears.

Sofia had folded in on herself beside them, her arms wrapped tightly around her chest. Rafe reached one hand to rest on her knee, rubbing soothing circles across it, whilst the other hand raised to rest on Leo’s shoulder.

“Why didn’t you say anything to the principal?”

“I didn’t want to embarrass mom.”

Sofia pushed away Rafe’s hand, rushing upstairs, leaving only Rafe and Leo in the living room.

“I didn’t want to upset mom either,” Leo whispered, the unwavering frigidity dissipating into a watery sadness.

Rafe was struck silent, not knowing what to say or do. “It’s good you defended your mom. That’s what family do– have each other’s backs, ok?”

Leo nodded, his lips contorting into a frown.

“And I know I was mad before. But I’m proud of you son, you hear me? You did a good and honest thing. Violence is never the answer, but sometimes it’s the only way– you gotta decide when is the right time to use it, ok?”

Leo nodded, taking his father’s words to heart. Rafe wondered if he was doing the right thing. Teaching his son force was sometimes a necessity? What kind of bullshit parenting was that? None of the hundreds of books and articles he’d read prior to Leo’s birth, said that. But he quashed away his qualms– he had faith that Leo knew what was right and honourable. After all, his mother was Sofia, and she was the most noble and righteous person he’d ever known.

“I’m sorry for shouting at you.”

“It’s ok dad, you didn’t know.”

Rafe felt his heart surge with a warm glow and and firey shame.

“You can go order some takeout. Grab something for your mom and me too, yeah?”

Leo nodded, before heading off towards the laptop. He seemed in better spirits.

Rafe sighed, standing up and walking upstairs to Sofia. Their bedroom was empty, the door to the en suite shut. He swallowed thickly, knowing how terrible she must’ve felt right now.

He knocked on the door, “Sof, it’s me.”

The door clicked open, Rafe slipping into the bathroom. Sofia was mess in of tears and sobs.

“Where’s Leo?” She asked, hands still gripping her sides.

“I told him to go order some food.”

Sofia sniffed, quelling her cries. “How is he? What did you say to him.”

“He’s ok. I apologised for shouting.”

Sofia nodded, a fresh wave of tears welling in her waterline.

Rafe furrowed his brows, his lips frowning in sympathy, “come here baby,” he murmured.

Sofia let out a shuddering breath, letting Rafe’s embrace muffle her whimpers. His hands slowly unfurled her tense grip from kneading her skin, leading her arms to wrap around his waist instead.

“I feel so terrible, like it’s my fault Leo was in trouble.”

“It’s not your fault. It’s Jared Richardson’s and his shitty parents fault, ok?”

Sofia moved away from the plane of his chest, looking up at him with wispy, tear-beaded eyelashes. “Maybe I shouldn’t have made them learn Spanish.”

Rafe shook his head vehemently, “stop it. You did nothing wrong. Don’t blame yourself for some asshole kid ok?”

“You’re right, it’s just hard to know my son is getting made fun of because me,” she said softly, her lips trembling.

Rafe pressed a kiss on the crown of her head, inhaling the sweet scent of strawberries, “you’re the best mother anyone could ever ask for Sofia. Leo and Eliza see it, I see it. Be kind to yourself– that’s what you always tell me huh?”

Sofia laughed, her eyes shining bright like two pennies, “you listen to what I say?”

“Occasionally,” he quipped, brushing away the strands of hair that were stuck to her brine soaked cheeks.

Sofia sniffed, shaking away her tears. “Ok, I’ll go speak to Ms Wilson tomorrow.”

“Sounds like a plan, I’ll come with you.”

“I don’t think she likes you very much,” Sofia teased with an impish giggle.

“I won’t say anything this time!” The two faded in and out of laughter.

“Thank you Rafe,” Sofia said, puncturing their comfortable silence. She ran her lithe hands up and down his back.

“For what?”

“For making me feel like I’m a good mom.”

“You are a good mom.”

“And you’re a good dad.”

Rafe shook his head. It was almost instinct. The ingrained, virulent denial.

“You’re not like him. You’re more than he ever was. As a man and as a father, ok?” Sofia declared, voice soaked in resolve.

She didn’t have to say his name for Rafe to know who she was talking about– Sofia knew of Ward Cameron and his contentious relationship with his son. A bond that hung heavy over Rafe’s mind.

“Ok Sof,” he whispered, voice barely a rasp. He conceded, giving in to her saccharine words and convincing tone. Maybe he was better. All he could do was try, with every fibre of his being and morsel of his spirit. He’d do better. Be better. For Sofia, Leo and Eliza.

Sofia squeezed his hand tightly, grounding him in reality. “Now come on, let’s go before Leo orders the entire menu.”

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[angelasmooore]

i know it's a little mean of me to tease like this but i've decided to stop writing my mob au but here's a collection of random unreleased scenes in case people want some barry/rafe and rafe/sofia drabbles. please do not steal.

for those of you that haven't read the rest of the story. barry and rafe are leading a gang together and avoidng their feelings for each other. Sofia and Rafe are planning a shot gun wedding after getting pregnant only a few weeks into their fling.

cw long post, drug references, swearing, sexual referenecs, cheating

dividers are @cafekitsune

HOTEL – NIGHT BEFORE REHERSAL

For two straight weeks, he’d had to gnaw his nails and clench crescents into his palms and blow right through his stash of coke because she was being oh so good. Fuck her!

She was being the perfect little daughter in law with her sweet smile and batted eyelashes and perfect halo. Not wanting to disappoint his dad. Not wanting to break the rules. Not wanting to get caught and it was absolutely infuriating and slightly intoxicating.

He actually kissed Topper square on the mouth when he’d told him he’d found a loophole. The absolute legend had convinced Rose that it would be nice for the couple to have an evening to themselves in a hotel. They could soak in the tub and order room service and reconnect. Totally innocent intentions. They’d be too tired for anything else, surely. It had been a crazy couple of weeks. She was doing them a kindness, really.

It would get her in Rafe’s long awaited good graces and Ward didn’t need to know. For all he knew they were tucked away in separate rooms writing their speeches for the reception.

And Rose actually brought that bullshit or at least she pretended to.

The second they were alone again he unravelled.

“Sof?” he called out into the spacious suite as the door swung closed behind him. His shoulders subconsciously softened in relief at the noise and busyness of the day disappeared, replaced by the subtle sound of distant rushing water.

“Through here!”

Rafe dumped his bags unceremoniously on the sofa and followed the sound of her voice through the bedroom and into the ensuite. He heard the click of the lock opening as she anticipated his approach.

Good. You could take the girl out of Brooklyn, but those safety habits still remained, and he thanked his lucky stars that she wasn’t some airhead that danced about in an unlocked unsafe hotel room where anyone could waltz or peep in.

“Hey…” the greeting is already half out of his mouth and a twist of a smirk slipping onto his face as he turns the handle. Rafe clamps down on the silly little flip in his stomach that feels childish and needy as he steps into the room. It’s only been two weeks! That shouldn’t feel so long. He shouldn’t feel so eager to see her again. She’s already his.

And yet he’s hit in the face with the warm glowing bathroom light and the soft billowing steam caressing his cheeks and it stops him in his tracks. Beneath the typical damp smell of humidity, he catches hints of floral smells and spices he can’t name before his eyes have even locked in on her.

She’s, unfortunately, already out of the shower dressed in a fluffy white rob and focused on wiping a clear circle in on the fogged mirror so she can apply her skin care. As she reaches for the first bottle she glimpses in the corner of her eye and turns, and he swears his stomach rises to his chest. Her skin is smooth and glistening from the soft light and their beach excursions. Her golden eyes brighten at the sight of him and a smile breaks out on her face as she breathes a soft “Hey…” Almost as if she feels just as giddy and foolish as he assumes he looks right now. “How was golf?”

The mundanity of her question shakes him from his stupor as she turns back to what he was doing. Rafe finally nears her from behind and that smell of jasmine and cloves grows stronger now intermingled with oils and citrus of the serums and creams being pressed gently in her skin. He wraps his arms around her middle and presses a kiss to the top of her damp hair. “Fine…” he shrugs half heartedly distracted by fixing her parting for her as his fingers itch for more.

Ward had dragged him on an afternoon of drinks and nine holes with the men of the extended family that both he and his father usually had very little to do with. It was apparently a long standing Lenihan family tradition. His mother’s old money stuffy types that had vanished the moment she’d died.

“Did your cousins come?”

“Yeah. Thankfully I wasn’t the youngest there”

“Good. That would’ve made it more fun…”

“It was boring….” He dragged out that last word with a heavy sigh. “I just wanted the day to be over”

“Tired?”

“No...” he tightened his grip on her and stoops to nuzzle against her neck “I wanted to be here”

Pressed tightly against her with his eyes closed he hears the lid on her moisturiser snap close and feels the warmth of her hands covering his own. She shifts her weight to rest back against him.  Her voice drops to a private whisper “What do you want to do first?”

They had all evening to do whatever they wanted but decision fatigue was beginning to zap her energy.

“This…” he pressed a firm certain kiss against the small slither of exposed collar bone peeking out from robe. His fingers unknot from their place against her stomach and travel down to her hips. Her own hands make no moves to stop him.

“What's gotten into you?” a breathy laugh slips out of her, and he opens his eyes just in time to see the amused smile on her face.

“You!” he groans and takes that smile as permission to let his kisses and hands wander “You’ve been a nightmare all weeks!”

“Not on purpose.”

“Liar….”

She giggles openly now, and he hears that smug mocking pout in her voice as his eyes fall closed again. “Has it been hard?”

“Very”

“It was just two weeks?”

“So?”

“Good to know I’m memorable then”

“Oh, you definitely are!”

She feels his hips press against her back and his fingers ghost over her upper thighs that only have the soft robe covering them. The warm tufts of fabric only amplify his touch shifting and teasing her skin rather than providing her any kind of protection from him. “Babe…. I just got clean”

“That's the perfect time.” Every inch of her was smooth and soft and scented and he wanted to soak in that sensation.

‘"You know what sucks?"

It takes him a moment to register her changing of the subject, but he doesn’t stop running his hands and lips over her frame. "What?"

"These first few months are supposed to be the fun bit."

"Of the pregnancy?"  

"Of the relationship. This is meant to be the clunky part. The early days where we get to be messy and play chicken with our feelings and have lots of hot sex."

He chuffs a soft laugh out his nose as his teeth tug on her ear lobe. "Isn't that what we're doing?"

"Yeah… but we're having to make these big life decisions. Day care and wedding dresses and house offers."

"You're thinking about daycare?"

"Well yeah. We need to be in the right suburb for the right schools."

"I'll sort it."

Sofia finally turns around in his arms, eyes open and a genuine sulking pout on her lips. Perhaps he hasn’t quite been successful in seducing her.  "It's so unfair. I just wanna be young!"

He debates her words with a pout and shrugs. ”Can't relate."

He pecks her adorable, scrunched nose and she swipes at him. "I know! You wanna grow up so fucking fast, baby. Slow down!"

"Hey…” he shrugs, feigning innocence, and tightens his holds on her hips against “we can be stupid later. We're just getting all the boring shit out of the way first!"

She gazes at him with warm brown eyes that glow with gratitude at how easy he can make this all feels.

He leans down to kiss her, but she retreats at the last moment. “I can’t”

“Noone’s watching…. for once…” he grumbles.  

While things had been stilted and awkward between them in a lot of ways, it was a relief to find that the physical side of things had never really wavered. At least they knew how to do that part. That was a start, right?

Once he’d gotten over the weirdness of sharing that space with a baby and she’d found ways to feel comfortable and safe, things had gone back to normal. Better than normal even.

In just over four months, they’d worked a lot of the kinks. Which was a new experience for him. Usually, things got worse as time went on. The sex became stale and boring and half assed and he’d let his flings drag on way longer than they should. She was different. This was different.

“No, I feel like shit” she finally admitted, and it explained her strange back and forth.

“Oh” his brows shot up before dropping into a baffled scrunched face. “How? You’re gorgeous!"

She laughed at how certain he was that any insecurities she might have must be ridiculous. She tugged his chin down to hers and pecked him quickly. “No, I mean everything either hurts or makes me feel sick.”

“Well, that’s an easy fix.” He leapt into action already leading her out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. “You lie down?”

“It’ll still be too much movement.”

“What if I’m really gentle?”

“I don’t think you know how!”  

“Ouch. I can be flexible!”

“You have like zero chill.”

“I can find some!”

“I don’t believe you. We’re not rushing anymore or sneaking around anymore, my friend.”

“Don’t call me your friend.”

“What should I’ll call you….? Pumpkin?”

“Hate that!”

“Good”

“You know…. I can do painfully slow when necessary?”

“Painful for who?”

He finally cracked first laughing at that quick retort. Letting her win that round.

“You know that I can go slow.” He stated firmly, his knuckles brushing over her bump “That’s how this little guy happened.”

“Hm no...” she pouted playfully “don’t remember it? I remember patching you up when you got your ass beat

“Different time.”

“Ah! Ok.”

“Are you trying to neg me...?”

“No... just stating facts...”

“I really don’t scare you, do I?”

“Nope”

“It’s cute that you’re trying...You’re gonna regret it though”

“Am I?”

“Mhm”

“Man…” she showed no signs of relenting “You must really like Brooklyn if you kept coming back after losing in a fight so miserably”

“I must “

“It’s a nice place. Pity about the gangs though”

“Yeah, they really bring down the vibe.”

“Someone should you really do something about that.”

“Mm it’s dangerous…”

Her flirting finally broke into a wide smile and girlish giggle, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. He picked her up and plopped her down on the bed, but his lips stopped short of hers. “You can wait”

WEDDING REHERSAL

The wedding rehearsal went smoothly. Sarah had thought of every last detail. Rafe reminded Sofia that this was a rare occurrence, and he was impressed.

There was one dampener on the afternoon, however. Sofia couldn’t shake Barry’s harsh gaze the whole time. He sat in the back row of the church scowling and silent like some kind of jilted lover a blazer hurriedly thrown over his white wife-beater and cream cargo pants.

Once the formalities were finally over Rafe looked to Sofia for permission with soft apologetic big blue eyes and the moment, she nodded he was off, practically flying to Barry’s side.

Sofia could only catch fragments of their whispered bickering before Rafe ushered Barry out the door with a firm arm wrapped around his shoulders. What the fuck…her lil bitch now…. I’ll deal with…. leave it…. listen to me…take this outside.

WEDDING NIGHT

The moment the hotel door closed behind them he changed. He dropped her hand, tossed his suit jacket nowhere in particular and he’d straight for the bar cart. Sofia’s stomach dropped as she watched his shoulders slump, and his jaw tensed. His demeanour completely transfigured from a man on the happiest day of his life….to a man on the worst.

“Rafe…”

“Don’t”

He shifted from a residual sloppy tipsiness from the wedding reception to a purposeful all-consuming intoxication frighteningly quickly slumped on the floor in the poorly light living room.

It felt safer to leave him to it.

“I’m going to bed”

“Why are you telling me?” he shrugged and continued finishing his bottle of scotch

Sofia scoffed at the audacity of that. As if she was asking too much of him. As if he hadn’t been all over her barely 24 hours earlier.

“I thought you might care” she bit back bitterly, losing her grip on her anger.

“You don’t have to pretend Sof. I know you don’t want this”

“When did I say that?”

“Who would?”

Sofia gaped at him amazed and crestfallen.

“You’re just scared of doing this alone…”

“Of course, I’m fucking scared but I’m choosing to do this with you…You know what? I don’t need these dramatics from you! I could be on Long Island right now!”

“Then why aren’t you!?”

“Go! Be with your mom and Abuelita and save the little shit from me!”

“Don’t call them that!”

“You know…life was a lot easier before I met you. I should’ve left you in that shit hole I found you in…You just wanted attention”

“You know that’s- “

“This whole thing is…bullshit. You tricked me. You trapped me. How do I know he’s even- “

“Fuck you! You can stay out there!” in a fit of rage and tears Sofia tried her best to close the large sliding doors but they were too heavy for her tired arms.

Rafe sighed heavily and staggered across the room to help her but rather than appreciating that gesture she immediately locked the doors.

“Oh, come on! At least let me get my shit!”

“No! I hate you for this! You’re being ridiculous and you can sleep out there until you’ve calmed the fuck down!”

Sofia cried herself to sleep in her brand-new white lingerie.

Rafe crept sheepishly towards the closed doors the next morning.

“Sof…are you awake?”

He heard the curtains rattle and rustle as she pulled them open, and sunlight spilled out from underneath the closed doors. Her shadow blocked some of the light and her weight squeaked the floorboards.

“I…” an apology never quite reaches his lips. “I said some stupid shit…but I’m serious…you should go. Just tell people it’s Adam’s and let this thing be over”

“Is that what you want?” a muffled quiet voice finally breaks the silence.

A beat.

“No…. but this whole thing has gotten so twisted…”

She opens the doors suddenly and with such force and speed that it startles him.

“Do you think I don’t care about you?”

“What?”

Sofia crosses the threshold from the sun-soaked bedroom to the shadowy living room.

“Do you think I’m just coasting through this or bleeding you dry?”

“What else would you be doing?”

“Staying with you...For real”

“Sof…”

“Rafe, I’ve seen your dilated eyes, and I’ve watched you sleep till noon. I’ve sat on the sidelines of your meetings and parties with Barry and I’ve heard every bad thing Sarah’s ever had to say about you.” She crosses the room in careful sure steps “You’re either doubting me or pushing me away. I don’t care. What matters is that I’m here.” She takes both his hands in hers. “I’m not going in blind, baby, I know who you are…You don’t have to hide from me.”

His head and voice fall. “You shouldn’t be here…This kid is going to be in for a world of chaos and…and danger and I can’t…”

“Then we’ll keep them safe. Separate spheres. Separate lives. When you’re out you’re out and when you’re home, you’re all mine. No business. No weapons.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. We’ll figure it out”

She kissed him softly and finally asked. “Do you want this?”

He nods gently.

“Well come on then…” she takes his hand and leads him back through the double doors.

“Just like that?”

“Well, you owe me an apology first.”

“I’m sorry. I know you’re here for the right reasons…”

“And…?”

“And I know the kid’s mine. Who’s else would be when it’s making your life hell already?”

“Thank you for saying that….”

“Now… are you still feeling crappy?”

“No…exhausted maybe…. Why? What did you have in mind?”

“Proving how slow and steady I can go…”

“Hmmm…Sounds perfect…”

“What time is it?”

“Why?”

“We have brunch with everyone at eleven”

“Whose ideas was that?!”

“Sarah”

“Fucking Sarah….”

"Now we're talking!"

A FEW MONTHS AFTER THE WEDDING

Rafe and Barry were like ships in the night. Worse than that, ghosts even. They slipped in and ouch of each other’s lives, carried out their business and then drifted away again. Barry iced him out for the good part of two months before they uttered any word worth hearing to each other again.

It was the middle of the night in Rafe’s penthouse. Sofia was safely squared away in their New Jersey home and he’d had to work late. Typically, an insomniac, Rafe never slept deeply so it was no surprise that he heard Barry come stumbling in with his spare key.

Rafe tensed, ears pricking as he lay still and waited to see which way this was going to go. Would Barry slip in beneath the covers like all was forgiven. Would he storm into the room with something big and brash to get off his chest. Or would he pass on the sofa as he always used to. Rafe’s heart sank as he realised it was the usual routine.

At least he was here.

At least he still knew Rafe’s door was always open.

The next morning Rafe woke bright and early and lay awake at war with himself. It was stupid really. What grown man was nervous to set foot in his own kitchen!

All those fears and frustrations immediately melted away at the sight of big tough Barry curled up beneath a blanket on his large leather sofa. He lay there, dead to the world, face first in what had clearly started as an exhausted drunk flop onto the cool cushions and evolved into a cozy morning nap in the sun filled living room. As Rafe’s looming frame cast a shadow over Barry’s face the sleeping figure grumbled and groaned turning over onto his side and tugging the blanket up higher around him. Rafe’s fingers twitched as a sliver of sun caught in his partner’s frizzy hair.

For the briefest of moments in his chaotic life, the earth felt silent and still. A gentle peace soothed the anxiety that typically clenched around his heart.

He’d come back.

That warmth in his chest pulled Rafe down onto the sofa and beneath the scratchy orange woollen blanket Barry always rescued from his donations box. Rafe would try to hide it away in the hallway cupboard or bury it deep at the bottom of the ottoman’s storage and yet it always found it’s way back out onto his sofa again. Harsh and gaudy and bright against his cool sleek carefully curated home.

He ignored the sensory nightmare of the hideous checkered fabric and wrapped his arm around him. It wasn’t long before his shuffling and rustling stirred Barry from his much-needed rest. The older man breathed a soft laugh but made no effort to escape Rafe’s tight grasp

 “Well, look who it is!”

“You are in my house”

“Yeah…I'll give you that”

“‘You’ll give me- ‘“Rafe parroted with a scoff “You're not the boss of me...”

“I'm not? Look at you. You’re seconds away from putting on an apron and making me pancakes”

“Fuck off…” he muttered and buried his face deeper into Barry’s neck, the gold chain cold against his cheek. Barry’s crumbled black dress shirt was tarnished by the smell of sweat and cheap alcohol and his skin was soaked in expensive cologne and cigarette smoke. Rafe has never understood Barry’s priorities. He cared more about what he put on his body than what he put in it. Rafe was the opposite. So long as he had his rings and his watch, he’d throw on anything but nothing cheap and nasty would ever cross his lips. His body was a temple. Well, a temple full of protein shakes and cocaine.

“Big night?”

“Yeah…”

“Any damage?”

The thought of Barry out on his own was oddly disconcerting. He should’ve been there. Even a harmless night out could go sideways quickly.

“Just my liver” Barry joked at first but then without Rafe even having to ask he added. “Vaughan and Corey were with me”

“Good”

Be careful

A heavily silence settled in on his shoulders and Barry let it rest there for a moment before he turned over to study his face. Barry roughly tugged him from his hiding place and lifted his chin to meet his gaze.  

“What’s this?”

Rafe shrugs trying to fight the large pout forming. He attempted to wrestle himself out of Barry’s firm grip but failed.

“Come on…”

Rafe groaned in frustration, desperately trying to avoid admitting defeat but Barry stayed focused. Rafe’s stomach twisted and his fingers tremored slightly as he finally met Barry’s eye again.  “I miss you”

Barry kissed him as if that was the very thing he’d been waiting to hear all month. Relief watched over them to have that closeness again, even fleetingly.

Things escalated a little too quickly and Rafe had to untangle himself.   

“I can't...I can't. I need to think.”

“So, think”

“Not like this. Get off...Get off!”

“Alright! Alright…I'll make the eggs you take your thinking time.”

Rafe sat on the edge of the sofa and ran a hand over his face. “Fuck....I need a cold shower"

Barry just huffed a small chuckle and focused on getting breakfast ready. While he knew he should leave the subject alone, let Rafe come to him, he couldn’t resist the urge to broach the subject first once Rafe was dressed and clean.

He set the plate down in front of him on the kitchen island.

“You could always just tell her”

“What?”

Barry shrugged unapologetically letting his words stand as used the dishes as a helpful distraction to the fraught conversation.  

“This isn't easy, B…”

Rafe was always full of excuses and cowardice. Where was the bold man he saw in the ring or out on the street? In the privacy of his own home his soft belly was exposed and while Barry should feel honoured to witness that vulnerability it was becoming grating

“Because you make it complicated. She could be totally fine with it.”

“She's super religious.”

“So? So's Patricia down the street from me and she loves you.”

Rafe’s eyes fall away for a moment with a soft smile as he concedes that point “She does.”

“Listen…” Barry finishes his dishes and rounds the kitchen counter to pull up his own barstool and give Rafe his full attention “I don't give a shit about no closet no exclusivity nothing. You do what you need to…What I do care about it is your word. So, if you’re gonna tell me now “Don’t worry Bar I’ll sort it” then you'd better. “

“Then I won’t say that”

“Good”

Barry goes to get up and let the conversation be over, but Rafe begins to vent.

“I don't know how these early months are going to go with her. I don't know if I... if we can trust her.”

“She already knows half your shit.”

“I know but- “

“But what? You don’t even wanna try? It’s just one conversation, pretty boy. It’s not impossible”

“Yeah, but it’s hard”

“Life’s hard”

“Bar, that isn't...This isn’t about being out. This isn’t about you or…. or hiding you… She's a good person.”

“And?”

“This’ll hurt her. It’s been months. The other girls...it didn't matter what you and I got up to. It does with her. She's my wife and-.”

“And I'm your boss.”

Barry states firmly and Rafe creeps out of his shell for a moment to push back on that. “Doesn't sound like it's my boss who's talking right now?

Barry’s lip quirks at that boldness and nods in acceptance. Touche.

“I can't cheat on her” Rafe finally states his intentions, and Barry hears him loud and clear springing off the stool. Good. That’s done. That’s sorted then. It wasn’t like they hadn’t been on and off before. This would just be an off season.

“Hate to break it to you, boy.” Barry switched tac now and slipped out of shirt on route to have his own shower in the guest bathroom and get on with this day. No point wasting any more time on this white boy “…but by some people's definitions...” he didn’t even slow down as he dropped his shirt on the sofa, we’d then been only moments before “You just did”

DECORATING THE BABY'S ROOM

“Stop! Stop…”

Sofia groaned as he dragged her away yet again from the paint roller and made her put her mask back on him and sit back on her picnic set up, he’d made for her in the far corner of the room by the open door. She sulked like a toddler in time out.  

“Rafe! I wanna help!”

“You shouldn’t be breathing this shit in. We have people for this”

“I told you I wanted us to do this together and you agreed”

“Yeah, that was before I researched how much crap is in this. No wonder people get high off it”

“Don’t even think about it” she teased with a flicker in her eye that he matched

“It’s tempting…”

“I hate you. You have all the fun”

“Most girls- “

“Women”

“Women would be happy to have the princess treatment you’re getting. You get to sit there and sip your tea and eat your snacks and I do all the work”

“It is a nice view…” her eyes ran over him even though most of his frame was shrouded in an oversized black tee and grey sweatpants both covered in white undercoat paint “but I want the work. You’ve wrapped me in cotton wool”

“Can you blame me? I’ve literally seen you threaten Maybank with a Chelsea Dagger! No self-preservation at all!”

“That was a good day…”

“You’re insane”

“And you’re paranoid”

“We’re almost there…”

“And then you’ll be watching what I eat like a hawk cause I’m breast feeding”

He had no defence for that. A comfortable silence settled in between them with only the soft guitar playing through the speaker, the rushing of the wet paint on the wall, and the crunching of her oat crackers.

His gaze softened as he took a break and settled in beside her on the pink picnic rug in a sea of white drop sheets. Sofia furrowed her brows studying that look in his eyes warmly at first and then sceptically as he shifted and changed. His eyes wandered over her large baby bump, her cut grey overalls, her royal blue shirt with daisy prints and back to her shiny hir and radiant face again.

“Babe…”

He murmured a questioning response half heartedly still taking her in.

“Don’t do that”

“Do what?”

“Look at me with those big eyes”

“What big eyes?”

“Like I'm too good. Like you're not good enough.”

Rafe scoffs at that his cheeks flushing his jaw tensing as he busied himself with making a snack. “We’ve been over this… I don't need another pep talk.” He grumbled.

“This isn't about you. It's about me…. I’ve had too many boys put me up on these massive pedestals. There's only one way to go from there. I'm not a saint… and I get it. I'm cute and I'm sweet so I must be an angel but I'm a mess too. I have needs and wants and...and flaws. I'm not gonna be your never complaining housewife or your permanently open legs.”

“Jesus, Sof!”

“You’d be surprised what boyfriends start to expect when they get too comfortable.”

“Well, I’m not your boyfriend.

“You’re not immune. Men get like…Things start to get easy and complacent. You stay together too long, and men get comfortable and entitled... they start demanding rather than chasing. I'm not your prize or your…. pretty doll.”

“I know that”

“And I'm not a doormat”

“I’m well aware of that...” his frustration started to seep through “so what's the issue?”

Sofia paused at that question. He was right. He wasn’t her boyfriend. He was her husband. He wasn’t a boy. He was a young man.

How could she expect him to just know all the ins and outs of her history? To understand all her complexities when he'd only just learned her middle name? Of course, he only saw a simple version of her at this stage. That was all they had. It had barely even been a year since they met. Of course, he thought she was too good, and he had to put on airs to romance her. That was normal. Things were still growing. Everyone put on their best faces at the beginning.

“Nothing…you’re right”

“What happened?”

“With what?”

“The others”

“Nothing just...just remember that I'm human.”

“Got it.” He rolled his eyes at the whiplash of this conversation. “You’re ridiculous” he laughed and squished her cheeks before pulling her into a warm kiss.

THEY GET CAR JACKED BY CLEO ON THEIR WAY HOME FROM DINNER

“This is crazy! You should go to Long Island!”

“I’m not having this fight with you again! I’m staying here. With you!”

“At least think about going to Kildare! Just until the baby comes!”

“No!”

“Sof! You need to be safe! You need help. You need family!

“You'll be my family!”

That stops him dead in his tracks. No one has ever…No one wants that from him. Not now. Not ever. Not even his dad. Not even Sarah. She has John B. She has her life. She doesn’t need him and yet Sofia is saying it now with such certainty.

“This isn't even-…” his stammers with glossy wide eyes unable to find the right words to express that he’s unworthy. That it’s dumb founding that she would hold something real and true within a marriage so false and hurried. This isn’t even real. This isn’t even love. How can she…? How can they…? The wheels are spinning in his head unable to connect with the tarmac.

“I'm not talking about being married.” She sets her black shiny heels he’d told her not to wear, now tainted with dried blood down on the coffee table and stepped towards him. She slips out of her coat and gold earrings as she speaks. Her long glittering black dress swaying with a rushing rustle like the wind as it brushes against polished concrete floor of his bachelor pad. Her eyes are big and brave and perfectly warm. “The second this little one existed you and I were done. That's it. We're not separate anymore. We’ll always be linked.  I'll always be tied to you.”  

She pauses but his brain still can’t find any kind of response. He simply watches on in awe as she lays it all out for him so simply. As if it isn’t the life changing monologue that it is. She shrugs and admits, “We might hate being married. We might be terrible at it and drive each other nuts. We don't know... Two years from now we could be divorced and swearing off relationships for good...”

He shoves back the tears that are forming and ducks his head with a shy laugh.

“But we'll still be parents. We'll still be family.”

She lifts a gentle hand to brush a tear from his cheek and lift his eyes back up to hers.“I want to be here with you.”

He cups the back of her hand and kisses her palm, nodding in acceptance and understanding.

“You'll always be my family...and I want you to be.”

The adrenaline of nearly losing both of them in one go tonight finally crashes down and mixes with the sincerity of her words that she doesn’t realize he’s waited a lifetime to hear. It’s an overpowering deadly combination…and he breaks down in tears.