ang3lwithapen

[ang3lwithapen]

dear author, whomst gave you permission to write such a BANGER!!! OH MY GODDD!!! I stumbled across this earlier today, played the demo through in one sitting with multiple playthroughs and have fallen deeply in love with every single one of the Blackwood siblings. I just know this is going to join the pantheon of IFs I never shut up about to my friends. I apologize in advance if you see me lurking in your askbox again. I will be returning. Thank you so much for sharing your work with us <333

That’s so sweet, thank you ☺️☺️ looking forward to seeing more asks from you!! Ehe

[ang3lwithapen]

Hi! So... I have a problem... (nothing serious don't worry haha)

Ever since the intro post for your game, I've been 100% set on romancing A. They are just my style of character and tropes and what not. But then, in the demo, especially after it last updated, I've been falling more and more in love with S. They are so sweet and charming and delightful.

And now I'm so SO conflicted.

If they were not such polar opposites, I could compare what I like in them and pick one (I'm a "one canon playthrough" kind of player). But this? This is hell! How can I chose between these two awesome characters.

Any crumbs you could tell us about these? In a relationship maybe, though not necessarily strictly romance related. I'm so trying to determine which one to pick here!

🤭 ok so.

A is constantly going to repress feelings they might have towards the MC. It’s going to be like, a block of ice melting very slowly. A is gonna grow more and more attached in a way that kind of scares them. A voice in their head will start saying “hey, don’t I deserve to set duties aside and have something good for myself for once?”. They’re also the one out of the four siblings that will be most conscious about what other people would say about your relationship. MC is like the forbidden fruit to them, represents everything they’ve never been able to have because they’ve always been tasked with being a perfect heir/househead first and a person second.

S however is gonna be pining after you lol. They develop a crush on the MC relatively rapidly (if MC does thing that way at least) even though they don’t want to admit it to anyone especially themselves. They’re a romantic at heart but feel like they’re not appealing/attractive enough, they realize they’re awkward and a bit strange, and find it difficult to bite their tongue and not be mean sometimes. That’s what they overcompensate with their art and fame, basically, it’s the one thing they feel they’re good for. (Other than the fact that their health doesn’t really allow them to go out much so they need a way to pass the time). So if MC were to express interest in them as a person, genuinely wants to spend time and get to know them, they’d get attached.

Where A would try to pull away when they notice their own feelings OR if they saw you liking someone else, S would always try to have your sole attention and would get easily jealous even in the crushing stage.

Also A is more gentle and mature about things while S tends to be more petty and childish.

[ang3lwithapen]

it's probably not going to be like that but I got this stuck in my head like a same sex relationship between MC and the chosen RO and MC is pretty religious being like

MC "b-but it's a sin!!!"

RO "omfg who careeess??"

LOL. This is going to be such a juicy part to write.

H and R are going to react similarly to that :D. H because they just don’t really have a reason to care, they don’t believe in god nor in tradition, and R because they’re already aware and fine with their own sexuality.

S would feel slightly conflicted about this. They never realized they were not straight before MC. Ultimately though they’d be like “does it really matter? I’ve spent my life convinced I’d never experience anything close to this. I don’t care if it’s not with a man/woman.”

A would be the trickiest because they’re all about tradition and family name. They are the “it’s fine when it’s other people but.. me?” Type of internalized homophobia. So while they’d want to reassure MC that what they feel is not wrong, they’d have to address the same for themselves in the process.

[ang3lwithapen]

I dont know what kind of asks you get but since I know right wing bigots tend to be louder, I just wanted to say that I am very happy and grateful that you took a stand.

As a trans, queer man myself I am scared and worried about what is happening in the world and currently in the usa. So every person that loudly takes a stand is so important. Especially since, as I said, these bigots tend to be quite loud and make it seem like their "opinion" (human rights are not an opinion but I dont know a better word since english isnt my native languages) is the majority.

So thank you from the bottom of my hard that you made that post.

Have a great day and stay safe <3

Love you 🩵. These are scary times and we must be loud and united. Stay safe as well x

[ang3lwithapen]

I'm totally in love with this story!

The atmosphere & characters are great (+ I love how IDGAF the housekeeper can be about stuff).

I was wondering, if you had to choose a song to represent each of the Blackwood siblings, what would they be?

TYSM!!!

Okay so read this and i was like i have to find the right songs and then just. Forgot. I am not an avid music enjoyer unfortunately so I have a limited repertoire of songs to pick from. I took so long..

Oh No! By Marina / God must hate me by Catie Turner for S

Creep by Radiohead / Young by Vacations for H

Nobody by Mitski / Love Like You by Rebecca Sugar for R

Bird Song by Florence + The Machine /The Family Jewels by Marina for A

Thanks for asking! :)

[ang3lwithapen]

I'm sorry author but why would u say something like that? Why would u limit things to certain people just because our choices don't align? I understand that everyone have different opinions and different preferences but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy or bond over other things in life... It's like just because I'm asian i can simply say that all black people cannot learn Chinese because it not for them (it's just not right and frankly it's quite selfish to restrict people like that ...)

i’m not gonna waste any more words on this but i genuinely want u to think long and hard on why a queer woman such as myself (with a basic sense of empathy) might have a reason to dislike bigots and right-wingers just casually enjoying her work lol

[ang3lwithapen]

Just want to make sure people know this account is strongly anti-trump and anti right wing ideology in general. I have no tolerance for any sort of bigotry, if you are a trump supporter my writing isn’t for you.

[ang3lwithapen]

Hiii I love ur if, it has major Inheritance Games vibes.

I imagine that R would be like Jameson, but I cannot decide is A or S is Grayson. (A because he is the "heir" or S because he is pretentious and enemies-to-lovers coded)

If A is not Grayson he is definitely Nash

Love This!!!!

I have never watched the Inheritance myself, but I will trust your word for it.

Tysm!

[ang3lwithapen]

I just discovered your game, and played through it in one sitting. I loved it, and just wanted to say I've never fallen so fast for an RO like I did teasing Sabrina. Can't wait for the next update!

thank you!!! very glad you liked the game and liked Sabrina so much :) it makes me so happy everyone is enjoying different LIs (and some time all of them).

[ang3lwithapen]

Hey, I just saw a post that dashingdon may be going down soon, you may have to transfer the game somewhere else, sorry to bring bad news.

Hello! I have received many anons with the same message. Thanks everyone for letting me know. My game is already up on the COG site, there’s the link on the pinned post. I will delete the dashingdon link from it.

[ang3lwithapen]

Not sure if you've addressed this but will there be a save system?

there already is, you just need to use the CoG site rather than dashingdon, it’s the last site in my pinned post

[ang3lwithapen]

if you want, as a suggestion that you can feel 100% to reject, you can POTENTIALLY solve your marriage debacle with the solution i planned for my own future period-drama i.f.??

i just planned to include a toggle in the beginning, saying something along the lines of "Themes of classism are mandatory in this story, but I decided against themes of racism to make this proper escapism. But would you like society during this time period to have the pressures of queerphobia should your MC romance a RO in a queer relationship? Note: There will be no hate crimes, only discrimination and tensions. But saying 'yes' will make a traditional marriage between a queer RO/MC pairing no longer one of the options for an ending." with a toggle saying "Yes, I like the added conflict." or "No, I want escapism from queerphobia as well"

or something like that. i havent figured out the exact wording i wanted to use. but something like that

anyway, you dont have to use it. and it does create more work for you, in that sense of accounting for variables. but i thought id mention it as an option? since you seem really unsure of how to proceed about marriage? again, you dont have to do what i plan on someday doing. im good any way you end up deciding lol

Ty anon, I had actually considered this as an option, it is just that this amount of branching might end up being too much for me, things would have to be substantially different based on the choice and I’d have to write that for four different ROs. :,)

[ang3lwithapen]

im sure any similarities are incidental, but i wanted you to know there is an animated six minute pilot/short-film from a decade ago called "Blackford Manor" from Cartoon Hangover (it's free on youtube) that then became a novel by "J. W. Grey" (im p sure it's pretending to be by the main character, Josette Grey, but idk if creator of "Blackford Manor" is actually named similar or not lmao) available for purchase. just seemed like something you would be into, so i thought id put it on your radar as something fun to consume!!

I had never watched it until now, but I did find the similarities funny/enjoyable. I also saw that the creator of the animation is married to the guy that made Over the Garden Wall, one of my favorite animated shows ever.

Ty for the rec :)

[ang3lwithapen]

Not to cause any struggle, but in the next update it will be the first time you’ll have to choose who to spend some time with between all four siblings :)

[ang3lwithapen]

seeing talk about MC names and like damn some people put a lot of work and care into picking a name (what is awesome and please never stop doing so people) and here I am just like "her name is Charity becasue I like virtue names :D" there's no deeper reason I just think it's fun

like sure I guess my MC would be the type to help others out without expecting anything in return so her name fits, but I figured that out about her long after picking her name so...

I remember Charity! When you shared your art of her I thought it was such a pretty name 😌

All MC names are valid ‼️

[ang3lwithapen]

annnnnd here is (part 2/2) where i talk about my MC's name. much love, best wishes!!

---

i saw your name-meaning post for the Blackwood siblings, and im so impressed with how you found names that not only look similar but have similar meanings/impressions!! as a fellow name-nerd, i thought id return the favor and explain my MC's name since you were so kindly thoughtful about your characters' names!

she is named Hestia Neven

1️⃣: "Hestia" is after the Ancient Greek goddess who personifys the hearth and home (her Roman equivalent is Vesta). well, technically, of "oikos", which is this kind of hearth, home, domestic life, family, society, household, kind of umbrella-term for "family and family's house" both on an individual and governal level

anyway, i liked the idea of her name kind of suggesting a "fated to be a housekeeper" vibe, but i also wanted something that paralleled her warmth and caring nature. and i think the image of my MC tending to the fires in the manor to keep the home warm for the Blackwoods in the winter does exactly that, while also feeling a bit like a "my light" term of endearment, where there is an implication that the manor would literally be colder/emptier without her. plus, my MC sacrifices her own comfort for "peace" in the house (mainly in regards to H, as discussed in part 1) (i use quotations because i really like how one of my friends said there is two kinds of peace, based on this book she read i forgot the name of: peace that isnt really peace, which is the absence of tension (it can lead to a lot of "shut up, thats just the way things are" mentalities). and true peace, which is the presence of justice. my MC is doing the former, for better or worse. ....mostly, worse lol), and Hestia's probably most famous story is how she gave up her seat as an Olympian god to Dionysus so no one else would have to, framed as heroic of her, as she insisted on sitting by Olympus' hearth instead

as for the etymology of the name itself, it means, rather predictably, "fireplace, hearth, alter". this is formed from the name basically meaning "burn" + "to dwell, to stay, to last through the night". which i also like for the Blackwood siblings, as my-MC-Hestia is someone who will be choosing to stay with them despite everything, who will sit through "the darkest night, to the dawn of new hope" or however the cliché goes, with "hope burns eternal"

but like. also? burning a witch at the stake imagry, angry mob with torches, Castlevania-Dracula's human-wife burning inside their home, or even accidental burns (Aang accidentally burning Katara's hands in "Avatar: The Last Airbender" comes to mind) of the Blackwoods either having someone who will be targetted by association or who they may hurt accidentally/intentionally

however, it should be noted that Hestia's hearth of folklore was predominantly fed with the fat of the animal-sacrifices humanity made to the gods, so, uhhhhhh, imsorryifBerthaandothersqualifyassuch, who said that

(there is also the irony of Hestia being one of the many goddesses of virginity, along with Athena and Artemis and so on, who never wedded and whatnot. its ironic because this game has a lot of romance of which i plan to wholly and happily engage in; yet Aphrodite and Cupid hold no power over Hestia-the-goddess, meanwhile Aphrodite and Cupid so-to-say have a lot of influence over my-MC-Hestia-Neven lmao rip)

2️⃣: then "Neven" has two possible name-meanings

k the first is South Serbian, and it means "marigold" which, in South Slavic, the said flower's name means "never fading" as a kind of pun based on marigolds for them being a symbol of hope, so it has a "may hope never fade" impression. It's usually a forename (Neven being masculine, Nevena being feminine, but also gender is a societal construct so anyone can be named either), but it has been a surname

the other meaning is related to some mix of Irish-Scottish as Neven (a masculine name, idk if it has a feminine form) is then considered an anglicized form of the name Naoimhín, which means "little saint" or "holy". though, under that same Irish-Scottish umbrella, may also be related to the surname Mac Cnáimhín, which means "little bone" or "little saint". the idea of "little bone/saint" is important because churches would collect relics of saints as a form of perserving/sharing said saint's holiness and veneration. this could be anything from clothes to, more likely, body parts. often bone. and, also, churches sometimes lied or were lied to, and have relics CLAIMING to belong to saints but actually are just regular people (This is not to say all relics are fake, some do actually belong to the saints they are supposed to be from), which reminds me of the Blackwood siblings a little. (though my MC is also an athiest, so it is a bit funny to be compared to those of sainthood then)

also! marigolds are often used in Mexico's Dia De Los Muertos (Day of the Dead), as an affectionate way of celebrating/missing those who have passed on. so. ontop of "maybe the one good, innocent person in this manor?"-energy (that may or may not be true, or may or may not conrinue to be true, either or), there is also a lot of "this bitch is in dANGER" energy mixed with "If the Blackwoods ever lose her, they'll miss her" vibes in surname alone lmao

3️⃣: in terms of meta, i like to think this means either her parents/dad or paternal grandparents or paternal great-grandparents were Slavic or Irish immigrants (maybe she's mixed, idk) (as i assume this game takes place in England?); and that she was named by a farming family, yes, but by someone in the family who was either very studious for the brief period they went to classes, is a bookworm, or was always fascinated by local scholars' stories. so there is a kind of inherent "climbing above one's station" in order for her to be named something so, at the time, academic since she herself isn't Greek. but it also implies she was very well-loved by that person, who saw her as such a warm person even as an infant, to have named her Hestia

but yeah!! id love to hear more people's MCs' names and why they picked them. here's mine in the meantime lol

and here is part 2 :D truly love how thoughtful this was. I've always loved the power and meaning that names can have, this was a joy to read. I did chuckle a bit at poor Bertha catching strays.

I would also love to see more MC names, so if anyone else wants to talk about them, feel free :)

[ang3lwithapen]

hello! i have an Ask i wanted to send you that i realized would be better done as two Asks and thereby reformatted them, so here is (part 1/2) where i babble about my MC's personality that i hope you enjoy reading! im p sure its obvious they used to be all one Ask though, so thats why im confirming they were originally joined together lol

---

i love so much playing a sweetheart MC who is jumpy/easily startled and also physically weak. thank you for giving me that as an option lmao

for one, because the juxtaposition of being all easy-to-scare (and it's okay if it is on accident) and sunshiney to only then give S an "unimpressed look" at their joke of murders and whatnot is just?? so hilarious. a part of me feels like, as my MC gets more comfortable, the Blackwoods being like "....don't piss MC off" over bringing in mud or making a joke that upsets my MC is hilarious. bc it's true to real life. my friends, family, and i all wholeheartedly agree that it is way more effectively scary when the smiley person gets angry than when an often-upset person gets angry. the 180 is scarier, and makes you appreciate how normally laid-back and giggly the smiley-person is as a result too

but yeah, i cant wait to have a route dedicated to each Blackwood sibling. i typically play one MC to all ROs, to see how the difference in romance changes the MC and how different ROs respond to the same person (plus: easier on my brain than creating and remembering a MC per every/almost-every RO), i just have different save files for different ROs. its not one whole messy route, even though i suspect that, in this game, until lock-ins, it will be harder to accomplish any route-differences lol (as in, my MC is always going to choose to have A show them around instead of R, even in my MC's romancing-R-route. bc getting to know the top-employer and getting a break from being flustered would motivate my MC to pick A, no matter the route. fair enough lol)

i think my MC is the most interested in R out of all of them. my MC gets easily flustered and startled, and R seems to enjoy that, while my MC is baffled by it and doesn't really know how to react or what this relationship is. this is as opposed to how my MC is assuming A isnt interested and ergo my MC does not see A that way (still gonna play A's route tho, and thatll be fun); how my MC is becoming tentative friends with S, and has yet to see S's mutual flustering over my MC's niceties as romantic (fair); and H, my MC is just fully scared of after having gotten lost, gotten a knife to the throat as a result, gotten cackled at unsympathetically the life-or-death panicking, then basically tackled for tentatively accepting the detective's card, and is just overall is trying to appease H out of a state of terror (hence, my MC keeping her manners (and also pleading) despite the fear of said blade, my MC lying that H was kind enough to help with the lostness, and my MC saying the card from the detective could be gotten rid of if it caused tension in the household, really, she doesn't mind, please). so. considering my MC's reactions: slim pickings, honestly. since my MC is boss-zoning one, friend-zoning another, and petrified of the "missing stair"-theory/metaphor of the third. like. of course, in terms of romance, my MC is the most intrigued by R. my MC has no idea what their relationship is, so by default, it has the most potential to become a crush (even though, i believe you in all 4 being slow-burns lol)

hilariously, the one IM most excited for is H and my MC. for multiple reasons. one, because i think the eventual 180, into almost hypocrisy from H, will be hilarious. like "Who threatened you?! Nobody's allowed to scare you!! You're so defenseless, who could ever attack you?!" like. H. you did. the first night my MC was in the manor and several after, you did that. the second reason im excited being because of the journey itself to get to that point, of H softening, of my MC learning to appease less/be less fearful, of MC transitioning from "threat to protect against" into "to protect against threats". i think H will have the hardest time moving from the position they are currently in (as is deserved, H shot themself in the foot there) and into being percieved as a suitor by my MC. like, again, respecting the slowburn; but i think with my MC and H's current dynamic (and of course, you know H better than i), out of the options of "who fell first? and who fell harder?", it will likely be a case of "H fell first AND harder". so. that'll be fun to discover if thats what happens or not lmao

which like. ill admit the anime/manga "Fruits Basket" is part of why i am affectionate for H/my MC despite my MC being so scared of H, because Tohru once said (im paraphrasing and summarizing heavily for Tohru btw): "I'm scared... But only because I don't understand, I don't know what's going on. I'm scared but, from now on, I want to understand. I want to keep living together, I want to continue to live life with you." to which Kyo replies (both to Tohru aloud and in his head, it's a mix), eventually, to with: "You know, if my mom didn't love all of me, that would've been fine. Or even if she was scared, I'd get that. Because being scared would have meant she was looking at the ugly part of me, and she never did. My mom used 'love' to avoid seeing the truth, to avoid even thinking about it. But I wanted her to understand. I just wanted her to say we'd face it together, to say she wanted to stay. Even back then, I knew it was stupid. A kid's dream that would never come true. Because who would ever say something like that to me? That's what I thought until... until Tohru." (with a past line that Kyo thought to Kyo's mom being: "How can you love someone when you never acknowledge who they really are?!" because his mom having always lied about how she "needed to keep him all to herself" when really she kept him hidden out of shame) which obviously isnt a 1-for-1 by any means for how i... i guess the word is "predict"(?) how H×my MC will turn out? (esp bc Kyo is dealing with a monstrous form, and not necessarily scary behaviors) but i mention "Fruits Basket" monolog bit because it shows how you can be afraid of your partner in a healthy way(?). idk, i feel like not everyone is on-board for "H×MC where MC is scared of H at first" and that's my lil explanation as to why i am already biased to be in favor of it

plus, considering H used to scare my MC, it would be funny for H to be among the ones to eventually shiver at the thought of making my MC mad. be a nice change of pace, esp since my MC's being mad isn't life-threatening to anyone, it's just "nooooo, ive grown accustomed to your affection, dont be disappointed/angry with meeeee" i assume lol

and then, of course, in addition to R and H, i am excited for A and S. im eager to see each of them to have their "Oh. OH." moment about their too-nice housekeeper. and am just so very excited for more of the game in general! im so curious what happened to Bertha and whats going on with the family. i hope you enjoyed my babbling about it lmao im very excited to see how each RO slow-burn falls in love with my specific MC lmao

You genuinely have no idea how flattering this is to me as an author, the fact you've been putting all these thoughts on characters i've written makes me so happy and amazed. Thank you so much for taking the time to write all of this down, it really does mean so so much and it's things such as this that make all the hours spent in crafting Blackwood Manor worth it. I've read this ask twice already, and I still have to read the second part (which i will be doing now!).