anenglishgirlinhanoi

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

Ba Vi 2017

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

The Last Year

21-07-18

So here it is, the first real update in over a year! I will be leaving Hanoi for good in less than a month. 

I decided to write this now because I just drove half an hour in a huge tropical storm to get to work, only to be told when I arrived that my class had been cancelled, which means I am now sitting in a cafe open to the road (as most cafes are here), holed up while the rain beats down, waiting until 3pm for my next class (which may or may not be cancelled as well, only time will tell).

Now, I’m English. Arrogantly, I thought I knew all there was to know about rain. I knew nothing. Even back home, you can feel when the rain is coming; there’s a sort of thickness in the air somehow. Here, just before the clouds break, you can feel every droplet of moisture on your skin and the air itself is hot. It’s like you’re walking through syrup. And then the heavens open. Droplets the size of pound coins fall and splash on your skin so hard and fast you can hardly see where you’re going if you’re like me and inevitably forgot your umbrella or your plastic rain poncho.

Anyway, here comes a slurry of things I’ve learned and general observations.

In the year I spent in my old job (I have three new jobs now), I learned many things. I learned that I’m a good teacher, which was very surprising to me. I learned that I absolutely love kids (though still don’t want any of my own). I learned that most native speakers of English know very few of the rules that govern our language (myself included). I learned that your superiors in the workplace can’t take advantage of you if you don’t allow them to, but that your excellent record at your job and glowing praise from parents and TAs alike will not help you when it comes to a renewal of contracts if you’ve spent the last year clashing with corporate management. Swings and roundabouts. 

Outside of work, I have to say, my perception of the world around me has shifted dramatically. I am still an extremely anxious person, but most of the things that worried me when I moved here don’t anymore (driving a motorbike, finding my way to a place I haven’t been before, even simple things I shouldn’t have been nervous about, like ordering street food). I seem to have adapted, which is nice.

I have made friends for life from all four corners of the globe through teaching, and have had many pretty crazy evenings with them (there is a story about being threatened by a guy with a meat cleaver, but I will save that for another time). I have to say, I’m not a party person. I much prefer drinking wine with one or two friends than being out out in like a club or something till 4am, but in Hanoi, you can sit in a bar until the sun rises, just talking with your friends. If the bar closes, you go to the flower market, order some questionable beef noodles and keep right on going. At home, the bars close around midnight and if you want to stay out, you go to a disgusting sweaty club and dance to terrible music and listen to people throwing up next to you when you go to the bathroom. I almost always opted for home.   

I’ve learned a lot about Vietnam and the Vietnamese from making friends with TAs and spending time with them outside of class, but also just from interacting with people on the street. Something I have found here is that people are not quick to smile at you, but they will help you if they see you need help. If your bike breaks down, a guy will stop and siphon off some of his petrol, or will push you (it’s a delicate procedure involving you sitting on your bike, the guy on his bike behind you with his leg and foot against the back of your bike driving and you steering), or will call someone he knows who is mechanic, and more often than not, they won’t accept any money from you for helping. It’s genuinely heartwarming, how quickly people will jump up to help you if you’re struggling. I can’t imagine that happening at home. 

If you’re a member of expat groups, you will hear annoying stories from people who are angry with Vietnamese for over-charging them at markets and such, but I have found that when you ask for the price in Vietnamese and understand the answer, you are much less likely to be overcharged. And additionally, when haggling (as often you must), as long as you keep a smile on your face, the seller will generally lower the price. The second you look annoyed or start being rude, it’s off. They aren’t going to lower the price. Which I think is something we should adopt in England. Rude to the seller? Fuck off mate, that’s 10% added to the price. I always find myself so annoyed when I hear those stories from ‘expats’. Someone tries to charge you $2 for noodles instead of $1? Fucking go two shops down and get noodles from there instead! Jesus. 

One thing that I need to mention, because it has unfortunately been a big part of the backdrop here, is violence against women, whether sexual or just a plain old beating. I read somewhere that Vietnam has the second highest rate of domestic abuse in the world, and I can believe it. I’ve seen things that make my stomach turn and couldn’t do anything about it. Recently a bunch of self-defence workshops have sprung up in the city because of how many expat girls are being assaulted, one of my best friends being among them. Last year there were a spate of attacks all in the same area by the same man (he was identified by coloured lights on his bike and eventually his number plate). We called him the Tay Ho Grabber. He would drive around at night looking for western girls to attack. When he was arrested, there weren’t as many attacks, but still a significant number. It is sometimes uncomfortable to walk down the street as a western woman, because there are so many pairs of eyes on you, and it’s not uncommon for men to shout things at you, or in rare cases (in my experience), try to touch you. Far more common is men taking photos of you, and if you ask them to stop, they laugh, come closer, and take more. In no way am I saying that western women have it worse here than Vietnamese women. I’ve seen men hit their wives/girlfriends in the face in the street repeatedly and almost no one batted an eyelid. Having a few pictures taken of you while feeling uncomfortable is absolutely incomparable. 

I am not in any way saying that Vietnamese men are bad, or that every Vietnamese man I’ve ever come into contact with has degraded me in some way. That is not the case at all. My closest Viet friends are men, and they are absolutely disgusted by the stories we tell them. But that doesn’t mean that I haven’t experienced these things, or that all the girls I know here haven’t experienced exactly the same or worse. 

Onto a nicer topic, I have managed to do some travelling around the country, although not as much as I would have liked, due to work. As of now, I’ve been to Phu Quoc Island, Ha Long Bay, Ninh Binh, Ba Vi, and Quang Binh. I also took a short trip to Siem Reap, Cambodia. I would love to go to Hoi An before travelling home but unfortunately I don’t think I have time. I’ma do a quick review. 

Phu Quoc is absolutely magical and I highly recommend it to everyone! It’s a tiny little paradise. I stayed right on the beach in a little bungalow. One of the days I kayaked to a teeny island about half a kilometre off the beach, called Fingernail Island, and went snorkeling there. I can’t even describe how in awe I was. I swam out a little way and spent probably more than an hour with my head underwater looking at all the amazing fish and sea creatures, a million different colours, swimming all around my body. I remember putting out my hand and tiny little fish swimming around my fingers. It was absolutely incredible and I will never forget it for as long as I live. Just to further push how magical it was, one of the nights I was walking through the surf in the dark and I saw bioluminescent algae (?) on the wet sand, glowing bright blue. I was running around like a child trying to spot the tiny little sparks of blue. The same night I decided to go for a night swim. The moon was full (or almost full, I can’t remember) and its light was amazingly bright. I remember lying on my back with my ears under the water so all I could hear was the sea, staring up at the moon and all the stars, brighter and more distinct than I have ever seen them. That night is definitely in my top ten of the best nights of my life. 

I went to Ha Long Bay with some friends who were visiting me from England. It rained the whole way on the bus from Hanoi and I couldn’t help but think, “Oh shit. This is going to be terrible.” BUT, just as we pulled into the bus station in Ha Long, the sun came out! I still believe it heard my silent pleas and made an appearance. The boat we got on was beautiful, and I had my own little cabin with a tiny bathroom. It’s difficult to describe how it feels to be surrounded by the wonders of nature. I was almost overwhelmed with it in Ha Long Bay. On the first day we kayaked out and around the amazing limestone columns that rose out of the water. It was so quiet and peaceful, and my eyes were open so wide to take everything in I thought they would fall out of my head. We eventually arrived at a little beach. It was beautiful and sunny (my ghostly pale skin had a tinge of red by this point) and swimming was so refreshing. We went back to the boat and had dinner. It was probably about 12 courses in all, but I can only remember the best one. It had a demonstration so we had to go out onto the deck and watch the chef. He had a huge pot over a flame, threw in some freshly caught, enormous shrimp that had come straight out of the bay, poured in a bottle of vodka and some water, and then pressure cooked the whole pot in around one minute. We went back inside and were each given three. I don’t want to exaggerate, but I’ll say it - those three prawns, with lemon and chilli salt, were the best thing I have ever eaten. EVER. So simple and so fresh. Anyway, the next morning I got up at sunrise and joined our tour guide on the top deck for tai chi, which I had never done before. It was really fun, and watching the sun rise while doing the exercises, surrounded by the columns, was just breathtaking. Side note: I am not as flexible as I thought I was. Those are the highlights from the trip!

I went to Ninh Binh not long ago as we were given some time off for (I think) Reunification Day (either that or King’s Day or maybe even Independence Day - though I think that is in September). The thing I remember most about the landscape was how GREEN it is. And there are the same columns there as Ha Long Bay, but coming from the ground instead of the water. As with most of the countryside in Vietnam, it’s beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. I still think that England is beautiful, with its rolling hills and moors, but it’s quietly beautiful. Understated somehow, like the people. Vietnam is DRAMATICALLY beautiful. Intensely beautiful. On the first day I went to visit a temple type thing that is at the top of 500 steps (I almost died). I forgot that I am deathly afraid of heights, so I have to admit that a few tears escaped my eyes on the way up and the way down too. I always forget how terrified I am until I’m halfway up something. The view was amazing, so I’m glad I did it. Following this, I went to Trang An for the boat ride through the river and through enormous caves. It was incredible, though I did feel sorry for the lady rowing the boat. Her arms must be thick ropes of muscle. 

I’ve been typing now for so long that my fingers hurt. My brain feels tired from racking it over the memories. I will possibly write about the other trips later, and upload some photos.

TTFN.

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

I’ve just realised how long it’s been since I’ve updated this blog. I guess I just got so used to living here that I didn’t need to document it anymore. I’ve been here about 20 months now and this is my life. This blog has very few followers, but do you want an update? It would be a pretty enormous post!

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

9th of December

Things are going really well. I am now a teacher. I have been teaching classes. I did the thing. I’m doing the thing. I can do things. The strange thing that I’m surprised by is that children seem to actually like me. Like, honestly, if I said that to anyone who knows me at home, they’d be like ?????? But it turns out I’m secretly good with children. A secret so secret that I didn’t know it was one of my secrets. 

Working six days a week is quite tiring, but it’s not really the actual teaching that tires me, it’s planning the lessons. All the teachers have office hours, so like four hours, four days a week, we all sit in an office in hour building planning and writing and looking up activities. It exhausts me to sit there for hours day after day but also I’m actually making friends. And I actually get along with everyone, which also surprises me. Because usually at work there’s always at least one person that you’re like wtf even are you get away from me. But I haven’t met any teachers like that here. We go for coffee at a lovely place round the corner together when we’re feeling especially fucked off with stuff, and it’s nice. 

So, one thing I do wanna address is that Christmas is coming up... and it’s great what my company is doing for us, like decorating all the offices in such a lovely Christmassy way, allowing us to have ‘festival’ lessons where everything will be Christmas themed (I’m gonna make my kids sing Christmas songs and make me cards), and they’re throwing us a Christmas party and everything. Plus, all the shops are in the spirit, huge Christmas trees are up (I especially like the one in my coffee shop) and every supermarket is playing Christmas songs. So it’s really nice to be around all that positive energy and Christmas themed stuff. But... it’s just not Christmas. It’s 28 degrees outside. There is no biting wind and my cheeks aren’t rosy pink from the cold. There are no Christmas lights draped over streets. I am not going Christmas shopping with my beauts back home. My family are on the other side of the world, and I have three lessons to teach on Christmas day.

And, as much as there are most of the same things (decorations, songs playing everywhere, etc.), I just don’t have that Christmas feeling, you know? That feeling you get when you’re walking down your city’s high street at night in the bitter cold with a big soft scarf around your neck and your hands in your big coat pockets because you forgot your gloves, and you look up at the lights and you look at the faces of the people around you and they somehow look a little bit happier even though as soon as it’s over they’ll go back to feeling however they were feeling before and you just know in your bones that it’s Christmas, and then your heart swells like the Grinch’s at the end of the film when it breaks that heart measuring device. And fuck, I miss that feeling. I resolve to not spend another Christmas away from that feeling. 

Anyway, other than missing that particular Christmas feeling, everything is going swimmingly :)

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

Also, side note! I am no longer terrified of everything! I have been on the back of Uber motorbikes, I have found my way to work on my own, I have gone for coffees alone in strange neighborhoods, I have eaten pho (beef noodle soup)!

I am still afraid of some things, but not everything! Progress!

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

23rd of November

So, I started work. My first week was pretty great, just like observing classes and meeting other teachers and TAs, and I had a lot of fun. I’ve met most of the classes that I’ll be teaching from Thursday next week, and made some friends too :) Everyone seems really nice. 

The only thing that is making me nervous about the job is what happened yesterday. So basically, it’s apparently a new thing at my language centre that the new teachers have to do these ‘demo’ lessons, which means planning a lesson and then showing 30 minutes of it to three people from management, who pretend to be the students. My demo was for preschool children, so being in a room with three full grown adults pretending to be five year olds was pretty fucking weird, and completely inauthentic. So basically, I thought it went alright (like I didn’t think it went amazing but why would it when there’s only 3 of them and they’re not actual students?) and then afterwards the main management lady just ripped me to fucking shreds for 20 minutes. Like not a word of praise, just criticism, after criticism, after criticism, some of which wasn’t relevant or was contradictory. E.g., she said I spent too much time revising colours and numbers, but they were pretending they didn’t know colours and numbers, so surely if that was an actual lesson it would have been good that I spent more time on it? Anyway, there was plenty more criticism along many other lines so I guess that doesn’t matter. 

So then after that, I had to go back upstairs and carry on working with the other teachers in the office, but they asked me how it went and I just started hyperventilating and a few tears escaped from my eyes. It was embarrassing as fuck. A really nice, cool teacher called Georgia was so, so cute to me and said it was exactly the same for her when she did her demo, and basically that Vietnamese people don’t understand tact, and are just really blunt. Like, they don’t get that saying loads of bad stuff is a personal attack to you, they just don’t see it that way. And then Becca came in and insisted that I come out for coffee, and then spent aaaaaages making me feel better and saying her first (and second) demo went really bad as well, and they laid into her. Honestly, everyone I’ve spoken to has said that management were absolutely brutal. So then I didn’t feel so stupid and embarrassed. A nice American teacher whose name (I think?) is Caitlyn said she had a panic attack after hers, but that after about 2 months things get better, either because you are better, or because you stop giving a fuck (she doesn’t know which). And that made me feel better. 

Today was my day off, and I’m back tomorrow. I have to start planning my lessons for next week. Sigh. I knew this was going to be hard work but I didn’t know I was going to be thrust onto the back foot almost immediately. I don’t feel encouraged to get better and work harder after that onslaught, you know? Anyway, I’m glad I’ve had today off to just calm down about it. I guess I’m just really not used to criticism, or at least not on that scale. 

Anyway. Hopefully things will get better pretty soon. Thing is, I’m not worried about teaching the kids at all. I think that is going to be brilliant. But I am worried about doing another six demos. At least the other teachers seem to have my back. 

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

14th of November

So the last week has been pretty quiet to be honest. James is at work a lot and I don’t start till tomorrow so I’ve mostly been reading and binge watching stuff on Netflix. 

In the meantime though, we have done some fun stuff! Now that James has a bike we’ve been exploring Tay Ho and other places. We well to the Dong Xuan market, which was insane. We stupidly set out in rush hour traffic, and getting there and getting back I genuinely didn’t think we were going to make it alive. It is so fucking terrifying to be on the back of a bike when there’s a million other bikes and cars and speeding and creeping up so close to you that you’re fucking sure they’re going to knock you off. The market itself I didn’t really enjoy. There were just so many people, and they were pushing and shoving me all over the place. Like, I realise you have to get by me but have you got to knock me around like that??? There were some cool things to buy though so I can see myself going back there, if only briefly and with a specific purchase in mind (and definitely not during rush hour traffic).

Looking around To Ngoc Van street has been pretty lovely though. There aree so many places I want to go with James once we actually have some money, but I’m afraid that won’t be for a while at least. There are some super cute bars and restaurants and shops that I can’t wait to go to. 

Last night James and I went to a little crafty market thing inside a cockatil bar, the Tiki Company. We bought some green pesto and a rosemary plant. I get that those aren’t particularly exciting purchases, but I’m pretty happy with them! It was called the Maker’s Market and there was loads of lovely little things there but as previously mentioned we are somewhat constrained by money. For example, as there is so much pollution and dirt in Hanoi, ever since i got here my skin has just been going to shit, so I was looking for some awesome skincare products. I saw this black face mask thing made by a company called Happiness, but it cost 220,000 VND and I just couldn’t justify it, even though every time I look at my dirty, greasy face in the mirror it makes me sad. 

Anyway, to the matter at hand... I’m starting working tomorrow! I’m kinda freaking my tits but also god I need something to fucking do. I can’t just keep sitting around the house while James is out. How do some women do that? Like I’m not judging, I’m just genuinely curious as to how they actually cope with the boredom. Even if you have cleaning to do, and books to read, and music to listen to, and shows to watch, it’s just actually mind numbing. 

So yeah. I’m really nervous to start. But I’m hoping I’m going to adjust to it quickly. Going to try and have a positive mind set instead of a panic attack (lol).

Also, one more thing. I’ve been thinking ever since the election really, that I keep tagging these posts with ‘expat’??? But like, I’m now annoyed by myself. Because I shouldn’t be buying into a system that categorises white people (mostly British and American) who don’t live in their country of origin as expats but brown and black people and Eastern Europeans are considered immigrants when they leave their countries to work in another. So actually I should be referring to myself as an immigrant. Immigrant has become such a dirty word and I hate that its definition has been changed so drastically to mean something bad; a drain on resources, undeserving, unwelcome, and so many other more ugly adjectives. 

So this is it. I’m a fucking immigrant and I’m going to use that word instead of the more dignified version: ‘expat’.

Just some thoughts and shit. 

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

7th November 2016

Yesterday was coooooool. We went to Hoan Kiem to go to the night market. We got there pretty early though so went to a bar overlooking the lake. I saw the turtle temple (I know it has something to do with a turtle?) on the lake, and the iconic red bridge. I have one photo of the temple but it is just terrible quality so I won’t upload it until I have a nice one. I’d like to walk across the red bridge when it is night (with hopefully less tourists?) because it’s supposed to be really beautiful at night. Hoan Kiem is really gorgeous by the lake but to be honest I was a bit annoyed by all the tourists? And I’ve only been here a week and a half. I really think that’s too soon to be annoyed. But in areas that are heavily western, to Vietnamese people I look like a tourist too and I don’t want to be associated with them? I’m finishing my sentences with question marks because sounding doubtful of myself is better than sounding like a dick. Which I fear I do anyway.

So yesterday I was feeling a bit out of it with Hanoi. I think it’s because James is getting off to a great start and is like a duck in water, just like having a laugh and trying new things, and then there’s me. Too scared to get on the back of a bike (even though it would be a million times cheaper than getting cars everywhere and literally everyone has a bike), too nervous to go to the little outside eateries where all the Vietnamese people eat because I worry that I just stick out like a sore thumb, terrified of crossing the roads on my own because you just walk into oncoming traffic. So I felt a bit… like the ghost at the feast, you know? The fish whose gills don’t work but everywhere the fish looks there are other fish breathing underwater and looking pretty cool doing it. I dunno.

BUT!

Today got off to a really good start! I had to go into the office for an ‘orientation meeting’ at 9am. I got an Uber to the office on Lang Ha, and usually I just sit in silence with the driver because in my experience they don’t really try to talk to you. This guy though! He asks where I’m from and when I say England, he gets really excited and starts telling me how much he likes England as a nation and that his 2 year old son sings English nursery rhymes, and then proceeds to sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and I’m just pissing myself laughing. Anyway, the conversation takes a weirder turn when he starts talking to me about the Magna Carta? Like, how does he know about some ancient fucking thing that some knights or lords or whatever made a king sign like hundreds of years ago? I don’t even fully know what it is and I actively enjoy history. So that was cool. 

So anyway, he also tells me he likes old English music, and we bonded over a shared love of the Beatles. He also likes Pink Floyd.

My meeting was cool also! I met the woman who Skype interviewed me and she’s super nice. Gave me loads of advice and wanted to know how I was getting on, which was lovely. She also laughed at my jokes, which I think earned me a few points in her book. I start a week tomorrow and now that I’ve actually been into the office and met people I’m just really excited to get teaching. It sounds like I’ll have a lot of support from the teaching assistants when I plan my lessons, which is obviously great. And the lady who I met today, whose name I think is Hiang? (I’m really not sure. I’m guessing how it’s spelt based on how it sounded when she introduced herself), she said that the kids really love the native English teachers; we just have to show how friendly we are. Which I can do. I did it earlier today! There was the CUTEST little toddler when I was on my way to the office and I smiled and waved and then he started laughing and I could have DIED.

Wow. This has been a long entry. If you’ve read my ramblings right to the end, I salute you. You deserve some sort of endurance trophy.

I was really nervous about going out on my own this morning, across Hanoi, by myself. Let’s face it, long blonde hair and almost translucently pale skin? I am immediately noticeable. And combine that with the fact that I have a vagina instead of a penis, and multiply however much I was unsafe before (let’s say ‘U’) by the fact that I’m a woman (let’s say ‘W’). The equation of (U x W) will always yield a much higher score for me than for James. But he doesn’t really seem to notice or empathise with me on the fact that no matter where we go, I will always be more unsafe than he is. So he really doesn’t understand that facet of my fear of doing new things here independently.

Anyway, so I was really nervous, but once I’d got out of the Uber and I was on my own with my cute little backpack on (I got Fjallraven Kanken for £9!!!!! I haggled!!!!) and a sense of purpose, I felt capable and happy. I think there’s something about his presence that makes me feel incapable and stupid, that stops me doing things. I don’t know. Because I mean, I’m extremely anxious (I’m sure you’ve noticed this), but if someone else around me is equally as anxious, I suddenly become some kind of super confident person who sorts things out. But if I’m with someone who is obviously more comfortable and confident in what they’re doing, I become meek and stupid. So maybe it’s his confidence that puts me off?

Anyway, I’m hoping this won’t be a problem for long. I’m planning on really working on the whole anxiety thing. I mean, I’m in a country on the other side of the world away from my family and friends. If this isn’t some kind of radical therapy for anxiety, I don’t know what is. Because I’m going to have to do things that I am uncomfortable with. And the more I do them, the less they will worry me. I think the whole purpose of forcing myself to do this was because I am afraid. And I don’t want to just not do things because I’m afraid. If anything, I think the more scared I am, the more I should try to do it. But then it’s like two sides of my brain are fighting it out: the one side shouting and screaming, “Don’t do it! You’ll do the thing wrong! You can’t do the thing! People will laugh at you! You’ll have to look at yourself in the mirror knowing you can’t do things and everyone else can!” and one side screaming and shouting, “Come on scaredy cat, if you don’t try it you’ll never know! You might love it! It seems scary now but I bet you’ll like it! You can do the thing!”

I hope the war stops one of these days. But I also know which I side I want to win, and I can’t predict the outcome of the battle. Wish me luck I guess!

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

All moved into our apartment! It’s so lovely. Last night we walked to a restaurant (JAFA or something like that?) but it turned out to be full of other westerners (American teenagers shouting and falling off their chairs and shit *shudders*), which of course meant that the food and drink was about triple the normal price and less than half as good. But, we sat outside and there was a POOL! So it was nice to eat next to a pool at night. It looked pretty. 

I have another observation to make: So far I have seen lots of Western men with Vietnamese girlfriends, but no Vietnamese men with Western girlfriends? I wonder why that is. I watched a Louis Theroux documentary about Thai brides and the men in it said they wanted Thai women because they know how to be ‘real women’ i.e. cook dinner, be thin, be quiet, do as you’re told, etc. So maybe Vietnamese men might not want Western girlfriends because they don’t do as they’re told? I don’t know. But I have also noticed that I’m treated differently from James? Like sometimes people (other men) only acknowledge James. Or if they do acknowledge me, it’s on the street and they’re leering a bit (last night I actually got wolf whistled. In my face. And James was RIGHT THERE and still didn’t notice. Men. Sigh.) And our landlord who is corresponding with me assumes that I’m a man (”Dear sir”, even though he can see my name is Summer?) because I’m the primary renter on the lease. I mean, I’m not that surprised. I didn’t expect gender equality from Vietnam. It just took me aback a little. 

Anyway, today we’ve been to the Lotte center. It’s a massive shopping centre kind of thing. We were looking for towels. £30 for ONE TOWEL. They’re taking the piss. It’s very fancy though. And there are Christmas trees! Even though I couldn’t afford anything there, I liked that. It reminded me of being in the White Rose around Christmas at home. 

I’m a little sad today because I know it’s Bonfire Night at home. And Britain is the only country in the world that celebrates the fact that some guy tried to blow up parliament hundreds of years ago. 

Remember remember the fifth of November, gunpowder treason and plot... I see no reason why gunpowder treason should ever be forgot... Good old Guy Fawkes, the mad bastard. 

Any other Yorkshire folk will know how much I wish I had some parkin today. Lovely lovely parkin. 

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

So this is where I live now. 

Could it be more perfect?

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

03.11.16

So, today James and I paid our deposit on the apartment, and we’re moving in tomorrow! I’m so happy; genuinely can’t wait. 

Last night we had to eat in a fast food place rather than the duck head and chicken feet restaurant we were planning on. I had some sort of pork roll that came with peanut sauce. However, plot twist: there was aniseed in the pork roll? It confused me.

Observation to make from the last week of being here: Vietnamese young people, and children in particular, are the friendliest, cutest creatures on earth. The children are just insanely sweet. We’ve had a lot of children say hello, wave and smile at us on the street, and last night a tiny little toddler started waving at us and then tried to come over to hug James’ leg. I nearly died. So frickin cute. But like, even the teenagers aren’t like our teenagers? They seem happy? What is that about? So yeah, now I’m just really hoping that I get to teach the really young kids. I wanna teach them colours and animals and draw pictures for them and shit. It’s funny though cos if I said this to anyone at home that knows me they’d be like, “Hang on a minute, you hate children.” I don’t know why I’m so fond of these smiley little babies. 

Also, funny thing from yesterday. James designed a task for his kids in that he’d give them paper with a letter on, and they would have to come up with verbs/adjectives that begin with those letters. So he was showing this to his HR lady, like, “carving, clever, calling” and one of the verbs she came up with was... “Coming?” Which very almost killed me. 

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

02.11.16

Today has been pretty stressful. Running all over Hanoi to sort out somewhere to live. However, I think we’ve actually found the place!!! Lake view in Tay Ho, two bedrooms. The window is so big and wide that it looks like there’s nothing there, like you could just walk out onto the balcony and see across all of West Lake. It’s beautiful. Hopefully things will all be sorted tomorrow and we can move in in the evening. 

Last night James and I ate in a vegetarian restaurant (that turned out to be very not vegetarian). I had pumpkin soup and Vietnamese spring rolls with a Bia Hanoi. It was delicious. James was of course less impressed (as a vegetarian), when his food turned up covered in a very questionable looking meat. Still, you live, you learn. 

James is currently teaching his first lesson. I really hope it’s going well. The school fucked up and sent him the wrong lesson to plan, then only told him a few hours ago that he needed to plan a different lesson. So he’s trying to get a job with my school (shouldn’t be too hard considering they have offered him a job previously), but if not there are a million places to work in Hanoi by the looks of it. 

I actually can’t wait to start work. I’m crazy nervous but kinda good nervous??? Like, I wanna go and do stuff that’s fun but still hard work and be given money for it??? Is that what a job is??? 

We’re going to a restaurant tonight that we ate in a couple of nights ago. It’s super cheap which is awesome cos I’m gonna be skint once I’ve paid the deposit and first month’s rent tomorrow. 

They serve poultry with the heads still on. I’m just gonna have some noodles. 

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

01.11.16

I am in a dirty, ripped chair (a colour that I suspect was once yellow), on a sort of balcony outside a series of hotel rooms. I am desperate to move out of this hotel. I can barely sleep at night for the heat, and if not the heat, the wind tunnel effect of a fan that will not spin slowly. First world problems in one sentence, eh? At least I have a fucking bed to sleep in. I can’t decide if complaining comes with being English or just being used to comfy beds in a cosy, fluffy socks kind of climate.

I met my new colleagues last night, Becca and Josie. We went to a Western restaurant and ate pizza. It was delicious. They seem to be really nice people. Becca seems very switched on and capable. In the first few days of her being here she got her phone stolen and it didn’t faze her. I’d have shit my pants most likely. Josie seems more apprehensive, like me. I told her that when I first got here I just sat on the hotel bed thinking, “Dear god, what the fuck have I done?” She said she was exactly the same. Honestly, if I hadn’t have come with James, I’d have spent the first night in the hotel and gone straight to the airport the next fucking day. She seems to be more comfortable now so I suppose in a couple of weeks I’ll be the same. My old housemate Duncan was a TEFL teacher and he told me that after the first week of teaching everything will be fine. He told me he actually scripted every word he said in his first week because he was so nervous, but I know him as a crazy confident guy so again, I’m hoping that the same thing will happen to me. Maybe I’ll go home as someone else. Someone who can actually cope with shit. Not even just cope, but take everything in my stride. At the moment I don’t have a stride. I have a hobble, or a trudge.

This morning James and I got a taxi to Tay Ho to view some apartments. The first one we saw was in the Watermark building and it was a strange experience altogether. The apartment was really, really small but beautifully decorated. It had a bit of a fancy hotel feeling to it; there was nothing homely about it. The windows were amazingly big but the view was of very run down houses. I felt a bit disgusting looking out of those big pretty windows in a 700 dollar a month apartment at houses that don’t look like they’d withstand a strong gust of wind. If anyone was ever in an ivory tower, it was us just then. The contrast was too much to deal with so close up. I prefer my sadness with two sugars. Though maybe that making me sad is incredibly patronizing to people who live in those houses. I really don’t know. It just felt too weird.

We spent most of the morning in a small café housing some Vietnamese guys smoking and talking agitatedly, a Western man who clearly hadn’t made it home from the night before (he was dressed as the Joker, green hair, purple suit and all) and what I think was the largest spider I have ever seen. We got some iced coffees (I will never get over how good the coffee is here, but I prefer it hot) and settled into yet more apartment hunting. An American came in who seemed to know the people who owned the café. He seemed extremely cool. The kind of person I wish I was, to be honest. Confident enough to go into places and get friendly with people. I guess I’m always too afraid that I’ll end up looking like a total dick.

About half an hour into this we heard a commotion outside and everyone in the café ran to the door to see what was going on. A woman had apparently come off her bike and the traffic was piling up around her. I wish I had got up to see if she was okay. I don’t know why I didn’t. Diffusion of responsibility, I guess. The American got up and asked if she was alright, and that was good enough for him. I’m actually surprised that I haven’t seen more traffic accidents. The roads are unbelievable. No rules, no fear.

I know it’s only been like six days, but I really miss my friends already. If I was back in Exeter right now, I could just nip round to Zohrah’s, or meet Jules for a coffee and talk shit through. I do feel better after writing about it though. It doesn’t seem as big of a deal now.

Anyway. I expect I will see them later for dinner. I hope James’ first day goes well. 

[anenglishgirlinhanoi]

31.10.16

I am sitting in a dingy hotel room in Hanoi, Vietnam. Lana del Rey is playing on my very cheap docking station. Tonight will be the first time I meet two of my new colleagues, who have been working here for two weeks already. I only got here on Friday and as of yet have not been into the schools that I will soon be teaching in.

As a new teacher I am pretty much shitting myself to actually impart knowledge and stuff. Being a native English speaker is basically my only qualification except for a pretty worthless TEFL certificate.