anaspecsideblog

[anaspecsideblog]

Sometimes I’m like am I even still ace and then I try to hook up with someone and I give them such a long list of no’s they’re like what would we even do and I’m like hmm yeah I don’t think this is “just” being a pillow princess

[anaspecsideblog]

Every day aromantics wake up and don’t choose violence and frankly some of you are not grateful enough about that

[anaspecsideblog]

FUCK it always feels so embarrassing getting turned down for being a pillow princess. And I am OBVIOUSLY not gonna express any of that emotion to her but I am just gonna vent here. Bleh

[anaspecsideblog]

I suspect my sister is arospec but possibly closer to alloro than I am and the attraction she does experience is exclusively toward boys (well, she’s an adult now, so, men) and I think she thinks of being arospec as this thing that defined me because it was so so rare for me (only one for sure crush from me) but like she has said out loud to me she’s not sure if any of her crushes were real! So she’s arguably more aro than I am!

And like I think it’s just not a big deal to her and she maybe doesn’t want to deal with aphobia from our mom the way I did but I just hope she knows she’d be so welcome in the community if she wanted to be and it would real cool if she embraced that being part of who she is, at least to me.

I also suspect she might be a flavor of alloaro and exclusively sexually into boys and that’s why shit is confusing to her. I was more aroace when we were growing up. Alloaros are so incredibly marginalized. She’s supposed to be straight in her head. Maybe she was sexually into the boys she dated and then broke up with because she realized she did not like them like that—that’s how she put it every time, she got bored, she wasn’t in love with them, they asked her and she said yes and then she realized she wanted out but didn’t really know how to do it for like MONTHS before ripping the band aid off.

I dunno, maybe I’m projecting and she really is just straight and not that interested in dating or she dated shitty guys in high school or whatever but like. I’m so convinced my sister could identify as arospec based on her telling me her experience and whenever I point this out she’s like “never mind, I like boys, never mind I just told you I’m not sure I’ve ever had a crush, I’m straight, im just not sure I’ve ever had a crush” sweetie you mean you’re aro and heterosexual?

She’s also never told me about a boyfriend or any partner at all in college but we don’t talk much or maybe she just hasn’t gotten together with anyone but is still alloro.

And like if she just doesn’t need the feel to label this it’s cool I just think we’re more similar than she thinks