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Sha'carri Richardson shedding tears on the podium after winning Gold for 4x100 Women race with USA at 2024 Paris Olympics.

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theestallion: MAMUSHI VIDEO OUT NOW⭐️🐍

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dreamspaces 🌿✨

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The Black Mountain | Belfast, Ireland (2014)

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@endlessnamelesseternity @jupiter-suggestion @filmnoirsbian @firstfullmoon

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“I plant roots so deeply in the people I love that I always lose a piece of myself when they go.”

— Beau Taplin

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Notes on being 30

I’m turning 31 in a week, I’m excited, I love my birthday and I love growth and change. Before my birthday I like to reflect about the year I’m leaving behind in hopes of entering the new year with perspective. It has been an emotional rollercoaster to say the least,a lot of good came in too and I’m learning from my mistakes, recovering from the pain and grateful for everything else.

Here are some thoughts, notes and humble advice on being 30:

I often tell my younger friends “make sure you get to your 30s with savings if you can”. I give this advice not in a “finance bro” type of way but in a “have money that can buy you some freedom” type of way. Freedom can be getting psychological/psychiatric help, a solo trip abroad, swimming classes, a year off work, whatever freedom is to you, save for it.

In my case, I landed here with no money, but since the universe works in perfect mysterious ways, I got fired from work and with the severance money, I bought myself 3 months off. I paid my credit card, I paid my student loan 3 months in advance, I started going both to the therapist and the psychiatrist to get the help I so desperately needed. It was the biggest blessing since I’ve been burnt out from work and life since summer 2022 and allowing myself time off without worrying about my live-hood was just exactly what I needed.

“Your new life will cost you your old one”

On a karmic level, your past comes creeping at you, all the lessons get back to check if you finally learned. I repeated a lesson from a decade ago. This time it took me less time to remove myself from the equation, even though it was even more heartbreaking than the first time. I learned my lesson the hardest way possible, it cost me blood and tears, but I did and for that I’m grateful. Life keeps showing us the same lessons until we learn, and it is important we do so or else we suffer.

On a lighter note, personally I feel very authentic at 30, I carry myself and all my past versions with honor and respect. Almost everyday I think teenage me would absolutely adore me, I’ve become the woman 12-17 years old me wanted to be. The greatest gift is that I like myself a lot, I like my own company, my sense of humor, my integrity, I like myself and the woman I’m constantly becoming plus I feel way cooler and more interesting than I did at 20.

I still have many fears but they are different now, I'm in less of a rush with everything, I started enjoying things more. I kind of understand why my mom made me say hi to people that met me as a baby. Life is about little moments, sharing with others and acts of kindness.

5 years ago I also realized something that has helped me navigate life and my 30s since: the most interesting thing about people isn't their job, their socioeconomic status, the money in their bank account, but the person they are and how genuine and kind they are. So I focus on that on being a better version of me.

Life is a journey to self and awareness, carry yourself with grace, be kind and fair, I wont say nice, but fair, because nice doesn’t really get you anywhere.

Anyhow, I’m alive so my life is in constant progress until the day I die. I'm not fully healed, I’m not fully aware, I’m not fully there, I’m just living. I have insecurities issues, self worth issues, I hold grudges, I’m bitchy and mean, I say hurtful things, I’m not a guru or guide of anything, I’m just a girl a few years older that wanted to share all of this.

30 is not an ending, it is a beginning and it is actually the right time to start over. Do not be afraid. Welcome life and every year on this beautiful earth with grace and try your hardest to find some joy in all of the small things.

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Trails and treasures.

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