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amara-eilish · 8 months ago

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so sick of you (chapter 4)

series summary: you and natasha have ended your relationship due to her cheating on you. it's been 5 years now. what happens when you bump into her at a bar on your birthday?

warnings: some swearing, light make-out sessions but otherwise none

a/n: took me 4 months to write this, progress?

day one in italy. it was like you could smell the pizza in the air as you walked out of the plane.

“are you ready to get this party started” wanda exclaims.

crazy how this girl was dead asleep not even 10 minutes ago and now she has the most energy.

i didn’t answer her however, looking for the girl who was on the plane with me.

“bitch i know you did not just leave me on heard!”

“hm?” i say looking at her

she rolls her eyes and repeats “i saidddd, are you ready to get this party started”

i grin at her, trying to forget the thoughts of the girl on the plane. i still never got her name.

we start walking out of the airport with our bags in hand. we (or well wanda) had ordered a scheduled taxi before the flight so we didn’t need to wait to call one. we head into the car to our hotel. looking at the view from the car i could just cry from seeing the view. my thoughts about natasha had faded from my mind. my thoughts were all on the plane girl and italy. i mean what better thoughts could i have?

once we reached the hotel we spent some time just hanging out there before deciding to start getting ready for some dinner wanda planned.

“girl i dont know about you but i’m just hoping to get fucked, it’s been too long since i’ve done it. your girl has needs.”

i laugh at wanda, she’s always got some out of pocket thing to say.

“girl same”

“don’t lie to me, i’m your best friend i know someone caught your eye on that plane, what’s her name”

i give her a look

“so you were awake! omg i hate you!”

“i love to sleep but mate i needed some entertainment and you being a fumbling mess was the best.”

“i hate you”

“remember the person who planned this trip” wanda reminds.

i roll my eyes and continue to get ready. i end up wearing a mini skirt and a cropped baby tee that says “i love italy” because of course you need one.

after eating dinner we head to a bar. we decided to just get a couple drinks the two of us and talk.

“yeah, and you know what that asshole steve did—”

she gets cut off by my phone ringing

“sorry!” i say

checking my phone i see “unknown number” flashed on the screen. i pick up anyways

“hello?”

“hey! plane girl!”

“hey! how come you’re calling me?”

“turn around” she says through the phone

i turn and see the brunette. her hair down in waves. wearing a button up half open with a loosely done tie and a black mini skirt. her glasses substituted with most likely contacts.

“how come you’re here? did you miss me that much?” i say

“no silly, you told me on the plane you were coming here after eating”

wanda looks at me with a stinky eye

i look back apologetically (even though i wasn’t sorry one bit)

“but how come you came?” i say

“i mean why not. when you do come you’re gonna need a name to scream right? and i don’t think i want to hear you screaming plane girl as entertaining as it sounds”

i laugh.

“well this is wanda, and she’s awake now, we were just talking but i don’t think she’ll mind if we leave for a few mins” i say also asking wanda

wanda looks away for a second not meeting my gaze.

“yeah go ahead, have the sex before me i guess” she says grumpily, with a hint of sadness in her eyes

why was she sad?

“bye!” i shout

i see from the corner of my eye wanda walking up to the bar to talk to some other girl. go her i guess.

“so! plane girl, what is your actual name”

“madison, but people call me maddie most of the time”

“pretty name, it suits you,”

“thank you baby. do you wanna get a couple drinks”

“sure, margaritas for me please!”

“wow cute”

“i’ll take the same as her please” she says to the bartender as i order my drink.

from the corner of my eye i see wanda leaving but i don’t go not wanting to leave maddie in this moment.

we continue to talk before deciding that it was getting late. it was around 2am when maddie and i get into the car. there’s music playing the background.

i feel maddies arm brush my thigh and it sends shivers up my spine. my body starts to warm up. we are still talking until she realizes my shiver. she looks at me eyeing my lips and my eyes. before anything else could happen she kisses me. our lips intertwine and we kiss like theres no tomorrow. she leans towards my neck and leaves a couple kisses there. by the end of it we are both breathing heavily. we reach my hotel and i step out of the car, thanking the driver. i kiss maddie one more time before getting out of the car.

“thanks for tonight” i say

“goodnight baby” she says before having the taxi driver drive.

i walk up into the hotel and get in the elevator taking out my key. it was silent in the room. wanda already snuggled up into our bed. i go to take my makeup off and see lipstick marks all over my lips and neck. i take a photo before taking my make up off.

i change into my pjs and slip into our bed before sending a text to maddie

attachement one photo

nice art maybe you should frame it?

i send to her, along with the photo of the lipstick stains.

“haha, goodnight angel see u soon ;)” she texts back.

i switch my phone off putting it on charge slowly starting to fall asleep.

i heard a faint sigh from wanda but i didn’t think much of it before falling asleep.

a/n: chapter 4 donee (ops on maddie??)

taglist: @lakita-fisher @marvelogic @dark-hunter16 @marvelwomen-simp

(lmk if you want to be added to the taglist ( i am in the process of making a new one)

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amara-eilish · 11 months ago

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so sick of you (chapter 3)

series summary: you and natasha have ended your relationship due to her cheating on you. it's been 5 years now. what happens when you bump into her at a bar on your birthday?

warnings: some swearing, but otherwise none

a/n: omg guys i’m acc so sorry this took 2 whole years to write. we’re gonna pretend that never happened…. you may end up having to wait another 5 years for the next chapter

finally i was on the plane. it felt like it took forever. it was an overnight flight which was good because i could finally get some sleep. wanda like the rich ass she is got us business class so we were pretty comfortable throughout the plane journey.

a couple hours had past and we were still mid air, wanda and i were sat next to eachother and in the chair next to me was a fairly pretty woman. ok i lied she was gorgeous. her hair was brunette with waves, she wore these black rimmed glasses and her lips looked so beautiful. i dont know why i noticed her lips but i guess i just did.

oh well.

i decided to get up and strech my legs for a bit, i felt some cramps in my legs so i needed to walk. wanda was snoring next to me while when harry met sally was playing in the background. i took a photo of her for evidence later. i walk up and head to the bathroom. it was occupied.

i stood there for a good whole 5 minutes till i heard faint moans coming from the bathroom. what the fuck. why are people having sex in an airplane bathroom, thats the most disgusting thing ever. they needed to hurry up bc a girls got to piss.

the beautiful brunette girl walks up to me, or well i guess to the bathroom. i admire her face.

“are people seriously having sex in an airplane bathroom”

i laugh and continue to look at her.

“honestly, like i understand doing it in your seat but the bathroom? seriously? thats the dirtiest place on the whole plane,” i said

“she laughs, are you headed to italy or is it a stop before another flight?” she asks

“yeah i’m going to italy, a friend actually planned this as a birthday trip, what about you?”

“oh, i live in italy, sorry let me rephrase i am italian and i used to live there, just visiting some family” she says

“oh nice, you’ll have to tell me some of the great places to go”

“of course!” she smiles at me

suddenly the bathroom door opens and a lady and a man walk out. both of them fixing their hair snd their clothes.

“after you,” the brunette says

“wait, i never ended up getting your name”

“we still have a whole 2 hours left of this flight, don’t worry you’ll figure it out” she laughs

i lock the door and began to do my buiness. i look at myself and i think i’ve seen death. my hair was a mess, and eye bags darker than ever.

i fixed it as a quick as possible before returning to my seat.

i smile at the girl before she goes in. when i sit at my seat i slap wanda a couple times trying to tell her what happened just now. she just slaps me back harder and starts snoring.

this girl could cause an avalanche with her snoring.

suddenly the girl returns to her seat and we continue to converse as if nothing had stopped us before.

we spoke as if we had known eachother forever. maybe we did?

the flight started to come to an end but our conversation definitely didn’t.

“you got a number or something?”

“yeah here let me type it for you.

i type in my number and write “your plain gf ;)” misspelling plane.

she laughs and points it out. “guess you’re a basic girlfriend then”

i look at her confused, only for her to show me i misspelled plane. i laugh and blush akwardly.

when the plane lands it takes forever for me to wake up wanda. this bitch just wouldn’t wake up.

after what felt like 3 trillion years, i get her up and we start to get ready to leave the plane.

we were in italy…

a/n: omg finally chapter 3 is out

lmk if you want to be added to the taglist making a new one

new year new me 😜

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amara-eilish · 3 years ago

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when are you gonna update so sick of you? i really love that series.. no pressure tho

hopefully soon, i've been very busy lately, but soon i should have an update <3

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amara-eilish · 3 years ago

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so sick of you (series)

a/n: guys im writing again. i've been writing a series. anyways im not sure how many chapters but it's a wandanat series, so have fun reading.

this is also based off of one of my fics : another love

series summary: you and natasha have ended your relationship due to her cheating on you. it's been 5 years now. what happens when you bump into her at a bar on your birthday?

chapter one

chapter two

chapter three and more coming soon

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amara-eilish · 3 years ago

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so sick of you (chapter 2)

series summary: you and natasha have ended your relationship due to her cheating on you. it's been 5 years now. what happens when you bump into her at a bar on your birthday?

warnings: some swearing, but otherwise none

a/n: i'll usually have two authors notes (one at the start one at the end) but there won't always be one.

check here for the series list

5 years later

"y/n! get your ass out of bed we need to go" someone shouts. why the fuck was someone up at 7am trying to convince me to get out of bed.

"wanda will you shut up its 7am."

"....your point is?"

"i swear to fuck wanda. if this place we're going to isn't good, i will smack the living shit out of you"

i wasn't kidding. i would. i hated being up early.

"relax y/n. it's paintball and lazer tag."

what the fuck.

"why are we going to paintball and laser tag so early."

"because"

this bitch. i swear. once i'm more awake i will literally push off 3 flights of stairs.

"wanda. im going back to bed"

"nonsense, you're going to come out with me" she says trying to persuade me.

"can't we go out at like 8 or oh my god i have the best idea." i say. wanda persuades me to go on, raising her eyebrows and tilting her head like she usually does when she's trying to understand something. "we just don't go." i say throwing my hands up in the air like i solved the world's hardest question. i mean i kind of just did.

"suka (bitch)" wanda mutters. i flash a grin at her and stick my tounge out, before walking back into my bedroom. or well wanda's but it's practically mine ever since what happened a few years back.

i knock at her door frantically. its 1 am. i didn't know why she was awake, but i was so thankful that she was. she opens the door to my tear stricken face and pulls me into the house, making me a warm cup of coffee. she sees my puffy eyes, and tear-stained face. wanda let me use her shower to cool off and calm down, giving you a pair of clothes to change into so you could get comfortable. never been so happy to have a friend to rely on.

"i'm so sorry y/n, she's an ass"

"i know, but i can't help but think what i did was wrong, should i have stayed"

"y/n, you did the right thing. letting yourself stay with nat would've been toxic to both you and her. and hurt you even more." she explains "take it from me."

i always knew i could trust wanda. she was like a sister to me. the two of us were so close. wanda's twin pietro had died a few years back, her mom died when was born, and her dad gave up at some point, trying to take care of wanda. i believe she was 15 at the time. she came to my door around the same time that i did that night, asking if she could stay at my place for a while. i never knew the whole story as to why her dad gave up, but ever since then wanda had been a part of my family. i guess she wanted to pay me back and help me this time?

"yeah, i get it. i loved her though wands. i loved her so much." i could feel the tears in my eyes. i didn't need to cry again. i honestly didn't think i could. wanda wipes my tears and lies down on the bed with me. "and then she cheated on me"

"for a guy as well" she says

"that doesn't help the situation," i say trying not to laugh. wanda always knew how to make me laugh, even after a situation like this.

"at least i'm still funny" she says sarcastically. i laugh lightly. we changed the topic later on to something else a little more entertaining. before wanda left the room that night she said this to me

"you can stay here as long as you like, hell you can even move in" wanda says to me before leaving the room i was in. later that night i moved into her room. i never liked sleeping alone, and sleeping with wanda always brought a sense of comfort to me. a comfort no one else could give me.

not even natasha.

i woke up a little while later to a glass of water and a card next to me with a picture of a plane. i questioned the card. why the hell was there a card with a picture of a plane on it. it wasn't like it was a get well soon card, and even if it was. i wasn't sick, or hungover. maybe it was put there on accident by wanda.

once my vision started to clear up a little, i looked at the bolded letters on the card.

"come outside"

i was going to do that anyways. i was that depressed. i took a few sips of water so i don't die of dehydration before going outside to the living room.

"would you mind explaining the card?" i say to her holding up the card.

"did you read the note?" she says opening the card and giving it back to you, to read.

"happy early birthday to my favorite.

got you a little gift.

we're going somewhere pack your bags."

- w

"wanda, you didn't have to, you know me i don't mind if we go to a restaurant" i say. birthday's weren't always my favorite things. don't get me wrong i enjoyed being appreciated for a day and the attention and obviously the gifts, but honestly losing Natasha really took a toll on everything for me. as well as that, too much attention was kind of annoying to me.

"yeah well, we can go to a restaurant in italy. tons really" she says casually as if it wasn't something i've been wanting for years.

"holy shit we're going to italy?" i excitedly say. i pushed myself forward into her arms and hug her tight. she knew how much i'd been wanting to visit italy. it was one of the places i had wanted to visit since i was a little kid.

"no, but it's okay you said you wanted to go to restaurant here it's fine i can unboo-" just before wanda has time to finish her sentence i've cut her off before going on a rampage.

"wanda. fucking. maximoff. don't you fucking dare. we're going to italy. we're going to go to florence and rome. i don't give two single shits about what you say." you could tell wanda was acting as if she's scared as hell, but i continued anyways. i fixed my shirt slightly before walking to the kitchen to finally make myself breakfast. i couldn't believe i was going to italy. i had studied the language for so long, and had fallen in love with the country. let's not forget the food either.

nat and i were going to visit it around our honeymoon time, but work got stressful for her so we never ended up going. natasha always promised that she would take a week or two off so we could go to italy, as a make-up for the honeymoon we never went on. we never ended up going. all nat did was work, every single day. there were days that she'd come home early, but she was never really fully present. she would always go back to her study to work or go to a club without me, saying that she just needed some time to herself. talk about a sad relationship. yes, that was mine. maybe i should win an award for that. that'd be cool.

wanda informed me that carol and maria would be joining the two of us, as well as sharon and the other maria. and before i knew it i was boasting with excitement. i don't think i've ever been this excited about a birthday.

i headed out for work later in the day, going to work at my local coffee shop. i greet the usual customers, making their orders fairly quickly already knowing what they want. one elderly woman who was a usual customer noticed my smile.

"what's got you so cheerful today darling, don't think i've ever seen you so cheerful since that girl," she says. i knew who the girl was that she was referring to. natasha. i would usually talk to her about natasha, and i didn't want to admit it, but it was true. i'd never been in such a cheerful mood since the day she left.

"well betty, my friend, wanda, has planned a birthday trip to italy for me, and a few of my friends will be joining along"

"oh, of course, you've always wanted to go there. i remember you telling me about how badly you wanted to go there. do you still remember the language o l'hai dimenticato (or have you forgotten)?" i smiled at the familiarity of the language. betty would always help me with my italian, she was fluent, and when i needed to get some practice in, she would always be there to practice with me.

"non preoccuparti mi ricordo ancora (don't worry i still remember)" i chuckle slightly. i pass her coffee and shortbread cookie and get back to work.

whilst i'm making an order i see someone new there. she was pretty. her eyes were a light green, sort of like the lakes i would see in aesthetic pictures people would take. i've never seen a lake that color in person though, so i'd never know if it was real or not. anyways back to the pretty girl. she was really pretty. i must be hitting the jackpot.

she comes up to me with a smile. i smile back at her sheepishly, i'm pretty sure i looked and sounded like an idiot. "hi! what can i get for you?"

"your number, sorry you must be busy, too busy for a joke like that" i laugh slightly at her joke, making me smile more than i already was. at this rate, a smile could get stuck on my face with how much i was smiling.

"no it's always a great time for a joke!" i say looking around the area.

"you're always complaining when i make one" i hear a familiar voice, wanda. i was pretty happy to see her. i could never comprehend words in front of pretty girls, and even when i do, i sound utterly stupid.

"your jokes are boring wanda." i say looking at her. i go back to the pretty girl infront of me. i take her order and ask her a few questions. i find out that her name's olivia, her brunette hair matching her eyes. whilst i'm busy making her order, i quickly scribble down my number on a tissue paper and hand it to her with a smile. she thanks me, and proceeds to leave the area, in a slight rush.

wanda winks at me and i just roll my eyes. classic wanda. "she's cute" wanda's says to me.

"wanda. just because i gave her my number doesn't mean i'm in love with her"

"but she was pretty" that's very true. she was very pretty. the way her lips moved when she spoke, and how her voice came out so delicately made her 100 times prettier, but it felt weird for me to catch feelings for someone else. it felt wrong.

i make wanda's coffee pretty quickly already having her's memorized. she gives me a peck on the cheek before telling me that she'd see you at home in the evening.

i was home earlier than i had expected to be. i take a small bit of time to pick out one or two outfits and check the weather in italy. i was pretty excited. i knew that if i didn't stop picking out stuff now i'd get way too excited and end up packing my whole closet. i got bored of that pretty quickly, realizing i had a hundred other things to do. so the next thing i know i'm at my couch with a bowl of mac n cheese watching grey's anatomy.

so much for doing the hundred things on my list.

wanda gets home later than expected, but by then i've fallen asleep on the couch.

she gives me a soft kiss on my forehead and brings me to bed with her. she tucks me in, and cuddles up close to me, letting the two of us fall asleep in peace.

halfway through the night i'm kicking and turning. daily habit i guess. wanda doesn't mind it at first, but soon enough she's kicking me back with the same amount of force. then i settle back to bed again. that happened a few times through the night, but at least wanda got her share of time with me. it's obviously because i'm amazing though.

when i wake up the next morning wanda's in the kitchen making breakfast for the two of us. i smile. wanda was almost always doing sweet things for me, even if they were as simple as just making me breakfast in the morning, or making a little card by my bedside for me to wake up to every morning. it was even simpler than that some days, as being awake the same time as me and saying good morning or good night. i loved that about wanda. something i'd always love about her.

every day comes by slowly. the days passing slower and slower. my ache to get on a plane grows. i just wanted to be in italy. luckily enough for me the week before the trip goes by fairly quickly. i get off work slightly early on friday so i could spend the rest of my day packing and going to the store to buy anything wanda and i needed. i let my boss know the week before that, that i was traveling for my birthday, and because she was so nice (one of my favorite bosses), she gave me an extra 100 dollar bill to spend as a simple gift.

perks of coming to work every day i guess.

the night before the day of my flight, i couldn't sleep. i was up all night talking to wanda. i went over the trip plan with her. the flight plan and how i wanted to sit in between her and carol. i could bet 1000 bucks that wanda wanted to sleep but it was hard for her to get it when all i kept doing was talking, and talking. she didn't mind it though. she loved listening to me talk. or maybe that's just my ego talking right now. she did say though that if she could, she would listen to me talking for eternities. i'm practically her favorite person.

whilst i spoke wanda admired things about me she didn't already know. like how when i spoke about things i loved, my eyes would light up and i'd do a little dance thing with my hands. she thought it was cute. that's because i am. just saying.

soon hours had passed by the clock, and i was checking my suitcase and carry-on bags for everything i needed making sure i had my wallet, passports, and everything else i needed. once the two of us were satisfied with everything. we ubered our way to the airport and proceeded to check-in. i smiled the whole way through the airport. i was finally going to italy. the place of my dreams. my dreams were finally coming true.

if only natasha was there to be with me by my side the entire time.

within about 2 hours i was sat on my flight ready to go to the place of my dreams.

a/n: i didn't entirely proofread this, but we're going on a plane with wanda. have fun bugging her.

taglist: @midgardianweasley @marlenesfilms @marvelwomenslut @wandanatvoid

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amara-eilish · 3 years ago

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so sick of you (chapter one)

series summary: you and natasha have ended your relationship due to her cheating on you. it's been 5 years now. what happens when you bump into her at a bar on your birthday?

warnings: angst, swearing, mentions of cheating, slight abuse (it doesn't happen but its a slight indication of that)

a/n: i did start this off sad. it's kinda my thing

check here for the next few chapters

"can you just kiss me, one last time that's all i'm asking" natasha whispered her eyes evidently red and puffy. we had been fighting all night. nat had come home from a long day at work the other night and had chosen to stay the night with steve instead of me. i were afraid that what you thought was going to happen had happened. i just so happened to be right.

"why don't you go kiss steve instead maybe you'll enjoy that more" i whispered, my voice going hoarse.

"y/n, baby please don't do this please" natasha says holding my hands. i remove your hands from hers quickly.

"don't do what? what don't i do? hm? you cheated on me natasha! and now you're telling me what not to do! no," i say raising my voice again. we had never fought like this before. it was always a simple argument but the two of us would always sleep it off and be fine with it by the next morning

"don't raise your fucking voice at me!" natasha says raising her hand slightly. i looked at her with fear in my eyes. i quickly pull myself back and duck, moving away from her, scared for what would follow. natasha realizes what she was about to do and the look in her eyes makes me break into more tears. i never knew my body could produce this many tears at once.

"wait. no y/n. no, i'm sorry i didn't mean to do that. i wasn't going to. baby please i didn't mean to," she tries to apologize. but i don't take it. they're just more lies she's feeding me. the words she says just go in, but i don't process them. i can't. not when half the time she could be lying. not when she could be apologizing again and again but not meaning it. not when all the words could be fake. were all our memories together fake? was everything she said to me, everything she promised me. were those all lies?

"i trusted you nat. i trusted you. i told you things i wouldn't have told anyone, and you promised me you would always be with me." i turned back around. "you've never hurt me. not once, but this nat? this fucking hurts." silence filled the room. nothing could be heard but the few sobs that i was trying to conceal. didn't work to well though.

"it wasn't meant to go this far y/n, we were only supposed to be sleeping," she whispered breaking the silence. i was broken. i was hurt. i was processing so many emotions at once, that it was physically hurting me as well.

"then why couldn't you have come home, if you had to just sleep, why go to steve's. if you didn't want it to go this far you wouldn't have gone there. if you just wanted to sleep you could have come home. we have a home. we have a home together." the frustration showing more and more in my voice. if we had bought a house together, she could've come home. that's the whole reason we bought it. to live in a home together, instead of having to sneak out and meet each other every day. "why him nat? what is it that he has that i don't? is what i give to you not enough? the love i gave you? the sex?"

"moya luybov (my love) it was an accident i di-"

"an accident!? an accident? oh my fucking god natasha. that's what you have to say? that it was a fucking accident because it sure as hell doesn't seem like. yeah, i've seen you two, the flirtatious looks. it's fucking pathetic natasha. you say you love me but you don't. not if you're out sleeping with other men or women. who else have you slept with. carol? maria? wanda? bucky? who natasha. tell me. i'm listening." my words come out harsh. the thought of her sleeping with other people made me sick to the stomach.

i had given her so much of my love. treated her with everything i had in me. i put my whole heart and soul into her, then she had to do this. she had to break my heart. i felt embarrassed. why? because after giving her everything. my everything. she still had the audacity to go out and fucking cheat on me.

"can-can we just work this out?"

"no nat. we can't work this out. you know why? because you've been lying to me this entire relationship. it wasn't me and you. it was always you and steve. always. 6 fucking months nat! why didn't you just leave me if you wanted to be with him so bad?"

sobs wracked my body. i had only ever loved natasha but this hurt. i couldn't seem to process the fact that someone who pretended so well to love me, didn't actually love me. they loved someone else.

"my friends all said you'd break my heart, i ignored them all. i lost all my friends to prove to them that you wouldn't break my heart, but here we are with you breaking my heart."

"y/n, honey, just look at-"

"nat how many times are you going to look into my eyes and lie to me. i cant do that, not if you're going to keep lying" i say. we fell silent again. again, it was nat who broke the silence.

"i've always wondered how someone as amazing as you could love someone like me." she whispers walking away from the situation holding her forehead, her head aching. i bring my head down and shake it not being able to process the situation.

"i don't want to lose you, but i can't live with this, i can't live with you doing this to me." i look at the ring shining on my finger and play with it, loosening it from my ring finger. nat is still looking away, i couldn't tell what her expressions were. happy maybe? happy that she'd finally gotten rid of me like she's always wanted. i whispered something softly. i don't know what made me want to say it. curiosity maybe? "was it him you were thinking of when you made love to me?"

nat turns around her mouth open. she had nothing to say. i pursed my lips in a line. i had gotten all my answers from just that one expression. "it's hard y/n, i love you a-"

"natasha. if you loved me, you would never have done this," i say flatly. natasha sniffs and wipes her nose with the sleeve of her sweater.

"i'm done nat, i'm done trying so hard for you to not even look in my direction. i'm not some toy you can play with! it's always steve, it always has been." i say shaking my head over and over again. my breathing becoming heavy. the more and more that came from this argument, the harder it became to deal with the pain. mentally and physically.

"p-please y/n, we can start over. i'll do anything, everything. i'll fix everything, just please don't leave me," natasha chokes on a sob.

"no, nat i don't think i can go through that again. i- i can't trust you anymore, not after this. and the thing is, after all this, i don't think i want to be made for someone like you anymore. "

"i never meant to hurt you y/n/n"

"yeah, well if you didn't mean to hurt me, you wouldn't have done this, you wouldn't have cheated. you wouldn't have dated me. you wouldn't have married me." i say all whilst gripping my hands together tightly. there were going to be marks left on my arm later. i couldn't cry in front of her again. i couldn't show her how weak i would be without her. i couldn't do that.

i walk over to the door of our shared apartment and placed my keys to the house on the kitchen counter. "here, give that to steve will you, and do me a favor, don't call this number again or me again." i say walking out of the door. i run to the elevator hiding from people, not wanting them to see me cry. i race to my car, open the door, and slam it shut. i sobbed into the steering wheel, punching it a couple of times, slouching into my seat. i hated this. i hated her, but at the same time, i still loved her. i loved her so much, but i couldn't do that to myself. i couldn't put myself through a relationship knowing that she was cheating on me. knowing she loved someone other than me. nowhere but nat was home. nats arms, her voice, everything about her was my comfort. i looked at my phone's wallpaper. it's nat and me. i went to my photos and changed it to a photo of me, carol, maria, and wanda all looking drunkenly happy.

i open a voicemail of nat.

"hey love, don't know if you're up yet, but i love you and i hope you have a good day, i just needed to run an errand, ill be back soon my love"

i pressed on her contact and blocked her. a message pops up asking if i were sure that i wanted to block her. my finger lingers about the button for a second. i hesitated if it was the right decision. but then i do it. i block natasha. she was out of my life. forever.

i didn't want natasha anymore.

i scroll through the rest of my contacts till i find the person i'm looking for.

"hey, can i come over?"

"hi, yes of course you can, is everything alright?"

"i'll explain when i get there"

"see you in a few, be safe"

i wiped my tears and drove off.

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