allbecauseitdied

[allbecauseitdied]

[allbecauseitdied]

[allbecauseitdied]

I have to stop allowing you to purposely hurt

I have to stop forgetting that you keep throwing my feelings and my name in the dirt

It is not going to change no matter how much I desperately want it to

But you make it so hard leaving me with really nothing else to do

My hands are tied and I feel like you know you're my weak spot You say I don't love you knowing that I do a whole lot

That is why we fight and makeup and nothing improves

You could care less if you and what you say offends me

You're content as long as you made no obvious attack towards me

You are not stupid which is why I know you don't care enough to hear me out let alone really try

But if you claim your love goes beyond mine then I just want to know why

If I leave just know it'll be so hard putting myself back together again

I know you will hurt too but don't kill me by trying to win me back again

Because if nothing changes then nothing will ever change

You just make things look good by covering up trying to rearrange

The things you know I do and do not want so that I'm blind to the truth and that is not fair

You cannot expect me to be the only one in the relationship that cares

It is one thing to be weak and run when expectations aren't met

But it is another to sit and wait around while continuing to let

The other one constantly tear down and build up like it has no sort of impact

But you choose to keep ignoring that the way you make me feel after every attack

Is what is going to end this relationship if it isn't already done

Yoy know how every time we fight I'll tell you that you won

I don't say it to get you mad I say it when I want out and I am done

You push me so hard to the point of no return

And behind what? Because you think u gotta teach me a lesson to learn

Or that if I demand respect then you will make sure I know that it must be earned

Don't you see that I am distanced from you and the world and more closed off?

You know I don't need sex even tho you'll say since it ain't you there's gotta be somebody else breaking me off

If you only knew how bad I wish you would try to get inside to the core issue of what Is wrong with me instead of just asking and then attacking when I tell you what's wrong with me

What makes no sense is when you say you care because you have me in your home and you feed me

But baby trust me it aint worth having the way you treat me

I wont deny our good days and the good days come with you being the best man I ever had

But I'll tell you that it goes overlooked because when things are bad man they are really bad

I never acted self entitled or unappreciative to the things you have done to and for me

I use my resources to try to give a little here and there for you to see

That I want you to smile too because I love remembering those little things that you remember about me too

It feels more than awesome knowing someone cares enough about you

But you cannot let whatever it is go which is what keeps you resentful towards me

I apolagize I really mean it and that is for everything I have ever done from the day we met to today

If I knew what it was I would make it right but you don't say

Or maybe the truth is that you do not have anything and these are just your ways

I tried accepting all of you I really did man you know if i didn't we would have been done long time ago

But I have lost who I was and I lost the want to get her back

Why would you who loves me want me to stay in something that makes me unhappy

I know if it were me It would hurt like hell but I would have to set you free

So please if you truly do love this woman you know what you need to do

I realized after this long that you would have changed if you wanted to

It is not right for me to keep asking the same things from you because I gotta respect that you are not willing to

So i am sorry if you felt your time was wasted due to me

I never meant to do any harm I believed happiness is where we would always be

So I love you Gustavo do not forget that and it wont be for a long time before I allow love back in my life

I must prepare to heal and patch up all the holes of damage I've done to my life

I hope you heal as well and come to find yourself the one who your family and the future Gus needs

I wish you best of health, prosperity, wealth and overall that Gustavo just succeeds

ℐ 𝓁 ℴ 𝓋 ℯ 𝓎 ℴ 𝓊

[allbecauseitdied]

P A S S I O N

𝓑𝓮𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓪 𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀𝓼 𝓱𝓸𝔀 𝓽𝓸 ����𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓮 𝒽ℴ𝓉 𝓈ℯ𝓍 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓹𝓾𝓻𝓮 𝓲𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓪𝓬𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓬𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓵𝔂 𝓹𝓸𝓼𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓮𝓼 ℙ𝔸𝕊𝕊𝕀𝕆ℕ 𝒾𝓈 ℴ𝓃ℯ ℴ𝒻 𝓉𝒽ℯ 𝓂ℴ𝓈𝓉 𝒷ℯ𝒶𝓊𝓉𝒾𝒻𝓊𝓁 𝓆𝓊𝒶𝓁𝒾𝓉𝒾ℯ𝓈 𝒶 𝓅ℯ𝓇𝓈ℴ𝓃 𝒸𝒶𝓃 𝒽𝒶𝓋ℯ. ℐ𝓉 𝓉𝒶𝓀ℯ𝓈 𝒶 𝒸ℯ𝓇𝓉𝒶𝒾𝓃 𝓈𝓅ℯ𝒸𝒾𝒶𝓁𝓉𝓎 𝓉ℴ 𝒷ℯ 𝒸𝒶𝓅𝒶𝒷𝓁ℯ ℴ𝒻 𝓃ℴ𝓉 ℴ𝓃𝓁𝓎 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓁ℴ𝓋ℯ 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝒶𝓁𝓈ℴ 𝓂ℴ𝓇ℯ 𝒾𝓂𝓅ℴ𝓇𝓉𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓁𝓎 𝒶𝒸𝒸ℯ𝓅𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 ℴ𝓉𝒽ℯ𝓇 𝓅ℯ𝓇𝓈ℴ𝓃 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒶𝓁𝓁ℴ𝓌𝒾𝓃𝓇𝑔 𝓁ℴ𝓋ℯ ℐ 𝒷𝓎 𝒶 𝓁ℴ𝓃𝑔 𝓈𝒽ℴ𝓉 𝒶𝓂 𝒶𝓃𝓎ℴ𝓃ℯ 𝓉ℴ 𝓈𝓅ℯ𝒶𝓀 ℴ𝓃 𝒶𝓃𝓎𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒶𝓈 𝒾𝒻 ℐ𝒷𝒻ℯℯ𝓁 𝓁𝒾𝓀ℯ ℐ'𝓂 𝒶𝒷ℴ𝓋ℯ 𝓈ℴ𝓂ℯℴ𝓃ℯ ℴ𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝓀 ℐ 𝓀𝓃ℴ𝓌 𝒾𝓉 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉𝓃ℴ𝓉 𝓈ℴ 𝓅𝓁ℯ𝒶𝓈ℯ 𝒹ℴ 𝓃ℴ𝓉 𝓉𝒶𝓀ℯ 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 ℐ𝓈𝒶𝓎 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓌𝒶𝓎. ℐ 𝒽𝒶𝓋ℯ 𝓂𝓎 𝓅ℯ𝓇𝓈ℴ𝓃𝒶𝓁 𝒷ℯ𝓁𝒾ℯ𝒻𝓈 𝒶𝓃𝒹 ℴ𝓃ℯ ℴ𝒻 𝓉𝒽ℴ𝓈ℯ 𝒷ℯ𝓁𝒾ℯ𝒻𝓈 𝒾𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓅𝒶𝓈𝓈𝒾ℴ𝓃 𝒾𝓈𝓃'𝓉 𝓈ℴ𝓂ℯ𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃 𝓎ℴ𝓊 𝓉ℯ𝒶𝒸𝒽 𝒶 𝓅ℯ𝓇𝓈ℴ𝓃. 𝓘𝓽 𝓪𝓲𝓷𝓽 𝓪 𝑯𝒐𝒘-𝑻𝒐 𝓫𝓸𝓸𝓴 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭, 𝓭𝓮𝓯𝓲𝓷𝓲𝓽𝓮𝓵𝔂 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓹𝓇ℯ𝓉ℯ𝓃𝒹 𝓈𝒸𝓌𝓃𝒶𝓇𝒾ℴ 𝓲𝓷 𝔀𝓱𝓲𝓬𝓱 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝒽𝒶𝒹 𝓉𝓌ℴ 𝓅ℯℴ𝓅𝓁ℯ 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓂𝒶𝒹 𝒸𝒽ℯ𝓂𝒾𝓈𝓉𝓇𝓎 𝓻ℴ𝓁ℯ𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓎 𝒶 𝓈𝒸ℯ𝓃ℯ ℴ𝓊𝓉 ℴ𝒻 𝓉𝒽ℯ 𝒩ℴ𝓉ℯ𝒷ℴℴ𝓀. 𝒫𝒶𝓈𝓈𝒾ℴ𝓃 𝒸ℴ𝓂ℯ𝓈 𝒶𝓁𝒾𝓋ℯ 𝓌𝒽ℯ𝓃 𝓉𝒽ℯ 𝓉𝓌ℴ 𝓈ℴ𝓊𝓁𝓈 𝓾𝓷𝓲𝓽𝓮 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝒸ℴ𝓃𝓃ℯ𝒸𝓉 , ℯ𝓎ℯ𝓈 𝓁ℴ𝒸𝓀 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓉 𝒾𝓈 𝓉𝒽ℯ ℯ𝓎ℯ𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒹ℴ 𝓉𝒽ℯ 𝓉𝒶𝓁𝓀𝒾𝓷𝓰 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓫𝓮𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓭 𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓮𝔂𝓮𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓫𝓸𝓷𝓭 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓱𝓪𝓼 𝓫𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓶𝓮𝓭 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓷 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓵𝓲𝔃𝓲𝓷𝓰. 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓹𝓪𝓼𝓼𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓰𝓲𝓯𝓽 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮𝓼 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓷 𝓽𝓸 𝓴𝓮𝓮𝓹 𝓽𝓸 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓯 𝓫𝓮𝓬𝓪𝓾𝓼𝓻 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓵𝓲𝔃𝓮 𝓪𝓯𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓫𝓮𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓵𝓮𝓽 𝓭𝓸𝔀𝓷 𝓷𝓾𝓶𝓮𝓻𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮𝓼, 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻𝔂𝓸𝓷𝓮 𝓲𝓼 𝓲𝓷 𝓭𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓸𝓯 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓹𝓪𝓼𝓼𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓪𝓽𝓮 𝓼𝓲𝓭𝓮. 𝓦𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓫𝓮𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓼𝓪𝓲𝓭 𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓮'𝓼 𝓪 𝓯𝓸𝓸𝓭 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱𝓽 : 𝓨𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓽𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮 𝓲𝓷 𝓹𝓮𝓸𝓹𝓵𝓮 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓮 𝔀𝓱𝓮𝓷 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓷 𝓽𝓸 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓯

[allbecauseitdied]

𝙿𝚊𝚛𝚝 1: 𝙼𝚢 𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚞𝚙 𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚢𝚎𝐚𝐫𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚛𝚞𝚐𝚜,𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚝𝚢,𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚓𝚞𝚟𝚎𝚗𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚜. 𝙼𝚢 𝚜𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚑 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚊𝚌𝚌𝚎𝚙𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎

𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚒𝚛𝚕 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚎𝚗𝚓𝚘𝚢𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚊𝚛𝚐𝚎 𝚌𝚛𝚘𝚠𝚍𝚜 𝚘𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚌𝚛𝚘𝚠𝚍 𝚊𝚝 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢. 𝙸 𝚎𝚗𝚓𝚘𝚢𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚊𝚝 𝚑𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚖𝚢 𝚍𝚘𝚐𝚜, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙸 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚘𝚏 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚢 ��𝚎𝚗𝚜𝚎. 𝙸 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚔𝚗𝚎𝚠 𝚍𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚍𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚢 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚏𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚎𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚝𝚘 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚐𝚛𝚘𝚠𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚞𝚙 𝙸 𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚊 𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚏𝚒𝚐𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑 𝚖𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚒𝚛𝚕𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚘 𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚌 𝚑𝚊𝚒𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚞𝚙. 𝙸 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚒𝚝 𝚒𝚗 𝚊𝚝 𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚘𝚕 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚗𝚘 𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚋𝚋𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚜𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚒𝚊𝚕𝚝𝚢 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚖𝚎. 𝙼𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚗𝚢 𝚓𝚎𝚊𝚗𝚜 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙸 𝚐𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚊 𝚙𝚊𝚒𝚛 𝚊𝚜 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚢 𝙿𝚊𝚌𝚂𝚞𝚗 𝙵𝚕𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚜 𝚕𝚘𝚕. 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚘𝚢 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚌𝚎𝚙𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚙𝚎𝚎𝚛𝚜 𝚜𝚘 𝚋𝚊𝚍𝚕𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚋𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚎𝚗𝚍 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛. 𝙸 𝚍𝚒𝚍 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚜 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖 𝙸 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚕𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚍𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚘𝚛 𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚘𝚕 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚋𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚍𝚊𝚖𝚗 𝙸 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚝 𝚖𝚢 𝚙𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚘𝚛 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚍𝚒𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚊 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚋𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚋𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚜. 𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚏𝚊𝚛 𝚏𝚎𝚝𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚎 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚊𝚖 𝙸 𝚔𝚒𝚍𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚕𝚘𝚕 𝚠𝚑𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝚝𝚠𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚟𝚘𝚝𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐. 𝐀𝐬𝐧𝐲 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚏𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚒𝚐𝚑 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚐𝚘𝚘𝚍 𝚊𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚍𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚢𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚊��𝚍 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚢𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚊𝚜 𝚕𝚘𝚠 𝚊𝚜 𝙸 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚋𝚕𝚢 𝚐𝚘. So this is the quality I know I definitely got from my fckn mom because most WAIT..........maybe not my Dad, ehhh.... ""Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!@$-$&$&&#!!!!"" fuck it, it would not be a lie to say I may have gotten it from Daddy also shiiiiit. Welp either way they are both to blame for my intense mood swings that literally would execute if muthaflippin words could kill. I mean God blessed me with a mouth that shiiiiit guuuuurrlllllll let me telll ya ass bitch I got a slick ass machete tongue that'll cut a bitch to shreds once I am through with her. I fckn go below the belts because once you fuck with me they're ain't no rules to nada and bitch I do not fight fair so yeah but anyways back to my pitty party lol. I hated the fact that I was a bit on the chubbier side and most girls in my school were like a size 0 so I blamed everyone except me for the size I was. I lowkey hated mom cus I would watch Health shows and shit and it would show an entire family on this keto diet with yummy and healyhy recipes living skinny as fuck. Here you got me who depending on my mom to feed me because I lived pretty sheltererd now looking back at life. Most girls primarily hispanics had to care for all them 7 siblings and shit so they had to learn what a stove could do and how microwaves made popcorn do fireworks in there. See I wish I would have had one or the other and I mean either a healthy freak mom who made sure her kid was in shape or a bitch who played mom to her siblings that way i could make healthy shit on my own because I would know how to at least do basic cooking. Well when I get to part three or something you'll learn why i never got the chance to be either one because my journey to be accepted landed me in handcuffs and living in juvenile hall where you eat what the fuck they serve you and you ain't got a sayso about it. Aite well straight up i hate reading and I am sure most people can relate so I ain't tryna bore everyone with a long ass novel which is why I am splitting my story into lil chapters I guess you can call it. So come back in 24 hours for part two motherfuckers and as I wrap every post up I would like to end shit off on a positive note. So you will be seeing a cute lil funny GIF, maybe a naked bitch next to some nigga's balls or just a damn inspirational quote to get your mind wet. I usually get people wet in other body parts but I do not want my first impression to be bad so we will save that for part two.

[allbecauseitdied]

I am something like a breath of fresh air

I am gorgeous from my clear skin to my thick luscious hair

The way that I walk, the stares that follow me as I walk into a room

It's the beauty that grows within my soul asn I continue to bloom

You don't like the way the boys look at me

But you don't treat me the way those boys would treat me

They say my name like i mean something to their life

I am almost positive if they could they would choose me as their wife

Why don't you change and maybe you'll look more like an option to me

Verse now how you just look like it's something I am used to

But you are too manly you have much pride

Don't you know pride be the death of love if you don't push it to the side

Until then deal with my chaos and my unexpected storm i carry with me

Because you know you have no other who will love you like me

[allbecauseitdied]

Why does it bother you so much tho

[allbecauseitdied]

I am sorry for wasting your time

I'm sorry for not being a woman that you could proudly call mine

I'm sorry for acting out when i would cry, pout snd whine

I know girls would kill for my spot, but u kept me front of the line

It's not a secret that we both long to call each other mine

[allbecauseitdied]

i love you with every amount of loving bone inside of me

You heal my heart when it hurts so bad

But you are also the reason for my soul being deeply sad

I'm confused as to which way I should go

Many times I've tried and all which I've failed at trying to let you go

You aren't the man I wish you could be

But then there are days that I think you might be

Why does it anger you so much when i call you out

You don't hesitate at all when u disrespectfully call me out

I hurt like I've never hurt before

My heart right now aches because it's so sore

My mind tells me to wake up , friends say it's time to shut that door

But everytime i even think of doing so, i end up sobbing like a baby curled up on the floor

I needed you to have my back this time, it would have meant the world to me

Instead you chose to ignore my cries and worst of all u blamed me

Why couldn't you just this once accept something that u were wrong about

You didn't even try to listen, u cut me off and all u did was shout

But it's not over for me and this situation i was forced to be involved in

God has my back and if nobody else will he will fight with me until i win

Don't you stress yourself I promise you I'll stop begging for you to listen

I may or may not make it as far as emotionally and mentally

Because each day that goes by i drown myself in the needle that is slowly killing me

I escape from my reality because it kills me to think about you no longer part of my reality

Why can't you see that i am dying inside

Why don't you cry watching me die inside

The cold hard truth is that ur also looking to hide behind

Anything or anyone that is blind to your ways

Because if they only knew, the evil behind your malicious ways

They'd turn their back to you and pray for you and better days