alexaverage

[alexaverage]

Haven't given this any title yet, but I wanted to redo an old story of mine. Will probably also give a world-building sheet if people like this because oh boy does this story have a lot that the narrator just doesn't give a shit about

I grew up in a household full of women. My mom always said my dad up and left, so she moved me and all of my sisters into a women only housing unit. The apartment was quite small, with me and two other sisters sleeping in one room and Mom, one other lady, and all of the babies they’d adopt in the other. I didn’t understand why they kept adopting kids when the house was already cramped, but I didn’t ask questions.  

Other than that, the apartment was nice. The walls were a mint green, and we had a bunch of mismatched carpets to cover the worn-out hardwood. The kitchen and the bathroom were both dated, but they weren’t bad, and Mom’s friend Anna always gave us fresh flowers and produce from her garden. That’s where I grew up for the first twelve years of my life. 

My mom was annoyed when I didn’t start speaking when she wanted me to, but I excelled at everything else so she didn’t fight me on it. I had little flashcards to show my needs, ones that I wrote and decorated by myself. All of my sisters were already in school and Mom didn’t want my help with the babies, so I spent most of my pre-schooling days educating myself with the books from her bookshelf.  

Once I read all of those, my mom decided I was old enough to go to the library. At first, she took me there and kept a close eye on me, but once I was in kindergarten she decided I was old enough to walk to the library by myself. So, every day after school, I’d walk to the little library from the bus stop in my little red dress, pop in for hours at a time, and then walk home during the sunset. I had to use my mom’s library card because she didn’t trust me with my own, which I was fine with. 

School was easy for me. I skipped all the way up to second grade right when I got in, Although Mom spent a lot of time arguing with the principal about letting me go to the school in the first place. I never really knew why because from what I saw, this school sucked. All the kids were too loud, all the teachers were bullies, and nothing actually challenged me but they wouldn’t move me up any further. So, I spent most of my time reading, cracking into classic novels and poetry that my mom probably would’ve disagreed with. I was fine though, mom stopped paying attention once I got old enough.  

Everything was going fine until I got into high school. There, a man pulled me aside and asked me for a few questions, and then a nurse took a mouth swab and my fingerprints. I thought nothing of it until my house was being raided and my siblings and I were getting taken into police custody.  

The police were nice enough, but wouldn’t explain the situation. At one point, I got hungry and slipped an officer my hungry card. He seemed to understand and passed me a granola bar with a “here kid.” It was nasty, but I was hungry so I ate it. They dropped me off at a police station and asked me to fill out this “all about me” sheet. I was annoyed by then, but filled it out anyways and went back to my book. 

The office was nice enough. The walls were gray and drab, but there were some police badges and photos to look at. “At least it’s not like the front office and school” I had to think to myself, but it was hard to when everything in life felt so gloomy. 

The person at the desk looked at me, “Your name is Z?” I nodded. She seemed baffled. I didn’t care, I just wanted to read. She asked another question, “do you know why you’re here?” I shook my head. She just sighed, looking like she was on the verge of a manic spiral. I couldn’t blame her, being at a desk all day must suck. 

Finally, she spat out, “Sweetheart, your mother... she isn’t your mother. Your real father is coming to get you.” I blinked, and finally closed my book, just staring for a minute. And it started to make sense why we never saw any adoption agents come and check our living conditions before the babies came home. 

“Martha.” Another man came into the room, looking like a stereotypical detective. I rolled my eyes at him, before realizing a very important thing: this man had food. I was still hungry even after the granola bar, so maybe if I behaved, he’d give me some. 

He spared me a second of a glance before looking at the woman, “I was supposed to tell her, this news probably broke her the way you described it.” I blinked, before grabbing one of my flashcards to tell him I was perfectly fine. I then scribbled down how me and her were never that attached. He looked like he was trying to understand, and that’s what counts. He handed me a bagel and a hot chocolate, giving me a pat on the head. “You’re a weird kid, just like your father. Do you know who your father is?” I shook my head.  

He chuckled and patted me on the head, “He’s very important, kiddo! Can you guess?” He looked at me expectantly, and I just stared back. He seemed to get the hint. “He’s...” pause for dramatic affect “Charles Sterling!” I nodded. He seemed disappointed.  “Not even a gasp? Dang, this one's broken!” He joked to the poor lady who looked like she was on her last straw just sighed. It hurt to hear, I knew it was right but it still hurt. I was a broken product, a malfunctioning part of society. Oh well, at least I was smart, even if no one will ever believe me.  

For those on the other side of the screen yelling “Who’s Charles Sterling?!” he’s some rich dude with a bunch of kids. I’m surprised he had enough energy to look for me with his four children. You’ve got Theo, the smart one who always looks like they're about to slit their own throat, Jack, a man-child who dresses like a clown and acts like he’s a literal performer when all he does is get drunk and do some tricks on a wheel, Tae, who is someone I’m afraid to write about because I know someone would stab me, and Hyde. I have nothing to say about Hyde, he seems like a half-way decent person. One of the girls in my classes really liked the family and talked about it a lot, so I had absorbed the information through her. I wasn’t surprised I was related to famous people either, intelligence must have skipped Jack, Tae, and probably Hyde, and hit me instead. It doesn’t really matter anyways. 

The detective man and the office lady whispered to each other about something I couldn’t be bothered to focus on. Then, the man threw his arm over my shoulder and enthusiastically stated, “Well kid, I’m going to take you to the train station! Your family will meet you there.” I cringed when he called them my family, realizing I now had to associate with dumb rich people. Why does whatever supernatural force that resides over this world just hate me? 

[alexaverage]

Here's an essay I wrote the other day!

“Someday we’ll find it, the rainbow connection, the lovers, the dreamers and me.” Recognize the lyric? It’s from the Muppets’ song Rainbow Connection, a song that’s been greatly important to me since I was in middle school. For me, it’s a sign of hope and good things to come, and I’d like to use this essay to explain why it is so important. 

Since I was young, there were signs I was different from the other kids. Not in the “I’m not like other girls way”, in a developmental way. I was more mature than my classmates, being deemed “gifted” at age 7 because I could solve puzzles, but I was a crybaby and struggled to regulate any emotion. I also struggled to understand others around me, which left me lonely and isolated, with the few friends I made being less than savory characters that would, at best, take years to be a safe person to talk to. 

When I went to middle school, things didn’t fare much better. I couldn’t understand anyone my age because I took everything they said literally, and I was deathly afraid of things like smoking and drugs, which led to me telling teachers about others habits so that they would “get help”. Sixth grade was the final year I believed that if I tried hard enough, I could be like all the others. That’s the year every other person my age really noticed something was off with me. I wasn’t able to be popular and handle the “cool” peoples' awful ideals, but I hated band and thought it was annoying. I was still a gifted kid that got all A’s so I couldn’t be with the burnouts, but I could barely connect with the other gifted children. I just felt outcasted.  

In seventh grade, everything just got worse. My only friend that I actually felt a connection with vanished into thin air, the bullying increased, I was constantly sick, and for once in my life, I realized I was weirder than I thought. I knew I was strange from a young age, but that was the first time I compared what other kids my age were doing and what I was doing, and just went “wow”. I gave up trying to blend in then. I wore my big, bulky, noise cancelling headphones, I talked to the teachers more than I did actual kids my age, I gave up trying to understand my classmates’ lingo, and I decided to begin online schooling.  

The first time I heard Rainbow Connection was actually my last day of in-person school, and it was the first time in a long time I felt true hope. Because it was the first time I felt like I was able to breathe in a long time. I could never truly relate to the terms people called themselves, things like “band kids” or “artsy kids” or “burn outs”, but I could be a lover and a dreamer. I could believe in the pot of gold under a rainbow or wishing on a northern star, no matter if it was childish or if it was stupid, it was mine. It felt like a safety blanket as I moved onto the next chapter of my life, something that reassured me that no matter what, there was something to come back to. Even if everyone on earth abandoned me, I’d have a stupid Muppets’ song to sing me into an endless sleep.  

I started high school five months ago, and it’s been one of the best times of my life. I’ve truly separated myself from the horrible people I became friends with as a child, I’ve discovered so much about myself, and I’ll keep doing what I love, I’ll keep dreaming about a place where I’m not strange, where there are others like me. After all, rainy days will always end in a rainbow, and rainbows lead to a pot of gold! 

[alexaverage]

Hi! My name is Alex, and this is my blog for my academic bragging and to post my writings without embarrassment! I'm 14, a Pisces, and a complete homeschooled freak who's terrified of getting less than a 90. I like writing essays and random fiction stories, but I might also brag about my achievements! Hope you feel comfortable here 🩷