alexandratheangel

[alexandratheangel]

‼️TRIGGER WARNING‼️ PLEASE BE MINDFUL WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ IS SENSITIVE CONTENT AND CAN TRIGGER TRAUMAS‼️ THIS IS NOT SUPPORTING HARMING YOURSELF OR OTHERS‼️ IF YOU OR A LOVED ONE ARE HARMING THEMSELVES CONTACT SELF HARM PREVENTION IMMEDIATELY TO SPEAK TO A PROFESSIONAL‼️ THIS IS INTENDED FOR ARTISTIC PURPOSES ABD EXPRESSION‼️

Blood for Tears

Blood is scary

On the eyes I think

So its easier to watch than feeling tears down your cheek

And if you need it you’re called mentally ill

How else do I survive

I try to be healthy

Its hard and I’m growing weak

I’ve been strong through the wrong things

So now I’ve wasted it

Like it’s gone

But don’t stress I won’t kill myself

Just a little self-harm

[alexandratheangel]

You know why I like being high?

So here

I cough a little and that sucks

And maybe I can't fully sit my head up

Because it feels so goddamn heavy

And my neck is stressed

And maybe my hands are numb

So yea it's hard to type

But I feel so good

Like that shit just won't bug me

I think I have lock jaw

But it doesn't hurt as bad

And I haven't received a text from him

Since I told him how I felt

That doesn't hurt as bad either

My mom isn't around

But right now it doesn't feel as empty to be without her

Nothing goes away

It's there

But I don't have to feel it

Think it

Lie with it

Cry for it

Feel rage towards it

I can be

And rationalize

Reminisce on things I never thought would leave

And feel a little happy about it

About something from back then

[alexandratheangel]

[ if it is within your ability listen and read]

Top of the mornin'

Good morning to you

The sun without rain

And everything else that I appreciate

The still winds welcome you out of your bed

And your guardian Angel

Protective over head

Prepared for the day

And listens in depth

So what you say to your Angel is this

“Good mornin’ to you,

Today I’m alive

And it’s all thanks to you.

There’s nothing I seek out of a day like today,

Just kindness and joy

But not much else I would say.

So if you would be so kind to guide me straight and true

I promise it will be me with open ears,

I’ll listen to you. “

Now we get dressed and walk on to a mundane 9 to 5

It’s nothing to knock because it makes me survive

And after this I’ll write and write and write

Pour my energy and night into my skills

My love

My life

Let me not jump too far

Let me enjoy right now

I’ll drink my Earl Grey tea

And enjoy my new mornin’

Down in the beautiful South

[alexandratheangel]

You're not the one

Do you have interesting features

that seem ancient or unseen

Do you appear out of this world

and new

Do you have a spiritual intellect that rises above human understanding

and a belief that strengthens the angelic aura around your heart

Or do you know your direction?

Your place in this world

Your reason for being and have you found your light?

Have you found the thing that makes your hands glow and your body sing?

And have you helped others and shared your knowledge with our black community?

Have you experienced everything and loved all and no longer need for anymore?

Do you desire less and just want to give him your all?

Have you found yourself?

Have you accepted all of you?

All your faults and misfortunes?

All your bad

and all your crime?

Have you told God your heart and built a relationship that is whole and pure?

Are you kind to him?

Do you clean up well?

Do you cook well and does the kitchen smell like true foods and rich spices?

Do you enjoy any moment that you’re with him just because he’s there?

Do you look in his eyes when you’re listening to him?

Does he tell you you’re unique and wonderful to him?

And does he love your smell?

Does he hold you close?

Does he want you forever and ever?

Then maybe you’re the one for him

Because I’m not.

[alexandratheangel]

[if it is within your ability listen and read]

(no pre-write)

Humanity

Trunks just sit here with me, just one sec

Please

Look at the sky

Wonder if it's real or not

If it isn't

They could've done better

And if it is

Bien

They could've done better

But I want to go

I want to see what the sky feels like

I just wonder if I'll find myself up there

I wonder what I'll see

Trunks look at the trees

Think about how deep the roots go

They have been growing for so many years

They've seen it all

And been through so much

But they persisted to stay

Look at what they do for everything else

They give home to so many other living things

They know without them we will die

So no matter what they do

They proceed to always come back

It took years of growing

For them to be so strong

So for that

We should give them grace

But we don't

Trunks feel the wind

It's so happy with everything right now

It's not too cold

And not scorching hot

So all that's needed is a slight breeze

Just to make sure everything continues move

The wind only moves fast and harsh when there is a disturbance

That's when it decides that things need to change

And then

When indeed

Things have changed

It becomes at peace again

Free to enjoy the moment

Before it has to change again

Thank you rain

Thank you for giving us all of you

Thank you for giving us your life

You did so much just to spend on the unappreciative and unnoticing

Go now

Give back to yourself

I am grateful

Animals,

l am so sorry

We are unfair to you

And l am so sorry

For all the terror we have caused

But you continue to grow

And comeback to guide us again through this sick world

I just hope

That after this life

You have entered a world that is beyond our moral ability

And that there is no further suffering

But if you come again in a different shape and form

Well that would be okay too

I would love to know who you could've been

As what you were before

And thank you Humanity

No I'm not quite sure why

Maybe because while we have done so much bad

The good ones are really good

If there was only the good ones

I wonder what we could do

So thank you Humanity

I guess,

For the good ones

[alexandratheangel]

[alexandratheangel]

Yang

If it is is within your ability listen and read 💙

I took a walk with my shadow self

Down a dark brick road

She asked "how are you doing?'

I said "well I'm doing splendid, how about yourself?'

She said "I'm doing great!"

With a cheesing smile that reeked of dishonesty and grief

And still,

We laughed

Passing by all the decayed buildings and fallen trees

We admired it all

Destruction

And loss

We talked for hours about the silliness of everything

The pain that we suffered

The losses that we caused

I just remember thinking that girl is so funny

So kind and so free

She holds her head down and always smiles with a cheap trick

Making me wonder what crazy thing she's planning now

This one is cunning and smart

She's mean and fast

And can eat a punch

Just as good as she causes it

How do you do it?

Not care for the things you do in this world

Not care about the lies you tell

Just as a joke to remove the disguise from the weak and the strong

You like the chase just to see who keeps running

You detach yourself from the needs of others

And your loneliness looks so comforting

I love how she talks with riddles and curiosity

She said "why the fuck are we still here?"

How bold

I said "because of me"

I like that when I give her a hug she doesn't hug me back

I told her I'd see her again soon

She continued to walk off into the distance

I drifted back to my life

And as I kissed my husband goodnight

I looked out from my window at the city lights

And simply went to bed

She looked down from her city lights

Lit a blunt

And missed her friend

[alexandratheangel]

[if it is within your ability listen and read]

The First Date

Dre: So you're single. Tris: *laugh* Are you serious? You're asking me if I'm here alone? Dre: Well nothing would be worse than you sitting with me but having some man on your mind. But understand that I wasn't asking. Tris: What would be so bad about it? Competition is healthy, especially for you. Dre: Please beautiful, tell me why. Tris: Its the only way you keep going, to know you always have a new chance at winning. Dre: So I scare you? Tris: No, but I scare you. Dre: You're starting to. Tris: Because if I say no, then that's one win you can never have. Dre: And that's what keeps this beautiful... Tris: To you. Have a good night, and sign the divorce papers by Tuesday Dre. Dre: Not until I finish my drink. Tris: I do love this place, its where we went on our first date. And that was beautiful. Dre: Yes you were, you were beautiful and mine.

[alexandratheangel]

[alexandratheangel]

“The way people treat you is a statement of who they are as a human being. It’s not a statement about you.”

— Unknown

[alexandratheangel]

Jane Mead, from “I wonder if I will miss the moss”

[alexandratheangel]

Wrote this one to remind me to keep my heart open to new things in life.

[alexandratheangel]

“The soul usually knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind.”

— Caroline Myss

[alexandratheangel]

before the Big Bang, there was no up there was no down there was no side to side.

There was no up there was no down there was no side to side, there was no light, there was no dark, no shape of any kind. There were no stars or planet Mars or protons to collide, there was no up there was no down there was no side to side. And furthermore, to underscore this total lacking state, there was no here there was no there because there was no space. And in this endless void, which can’t be thought of as a place, there was no time and so no passing minutes, hours days. Of all the paradoxes that belabor common sense, I think this one’s the greatest this time before events, because how did we get from nothing to infinitely dense from immeasurably small to inconceivably immense. But before we get unmoored from the question at the start, let’s take a breath and marvel at when math becomes an art because we don’t have to understand it to know there was a time when there was no up there was no down. There was no side to side

https://www.tiktok.com/@reinaofthecid

Reina del Cid

https://www.youtube.com/reinadelcid

[alexandratheangel]

[If it is within your power, listen and read]

Full House | where the waves take us

There's two rooms, a king bed and a full Both with a nice set of sheets and a warm comforter, more pillows than anyone would need A dog lives here, and he enjoys life and has the biggest attitude but he's fun He’s the fastest dog in the world, and he loves to play with us and outsmart his humans Each lamp has an array of colors to choose from Each night is a different mood It makes the home so personal There's two bathrooms one with his stuff, and one with her things Her bathroom has a rosy scent to it and the smell of flowers that he got her sit in a vase on the toilet Sometimes, the sage and balsam candle is lit as a way of welcoming more guests Eyeshadow and brushes organized on top of the counter and on the other side is a 9 step skin care routine Each bottle has a beautiful label fit just for her, and in the top right corner of her mirror is a note a note from someone beautiful reading: "i can't wait to see you again. i love you so much. xoxo, mom." And in his he keeps his space open, he likes seeing the counter it makes things feel clean, and controlled In the living room sits their furniture the couch and the chair the white coffee table a painting made by a friend The kitchen has all the tools of creation in it, it's where they join together to create beautiful dishes to eat there's a shoe rack in the walkway and other needed things "What an empty home", you wouldn't say you wouldn't think to say but there are no voices no conversation no emotions no talking no sound nothing that isn't the tv on at 3am no there's no aura proving anyone is alive inside there's no light exuding from the spirit only the light made by scientific men there's no kindness it constantly feels dry in here it feels like there used to be love and in here there is an empty full house

[alexandratheangel]

[if it is within your ability listen and read]

In love with the sky

I wanted to go and she took me I told her "take me anywhere" I had faith 3 words to my mirror she said "I seek peace" and the mirror opened

Slowly she guided me through a viny covered maze filled with all the treasures of nature Diamond flowers and golden herbs rich soil and fine stone Mini crystal coves on the way Then I see sun then I see more Through the doorway opened a field of life Fruit trees I've never seen Mountains I could fly to No where was desecrated Everything full of color and love Speeding past came a pack of dogs One particular I loved the most A charming little guy he came up to me Immediately I felt at home I could breathe and told her "thank you" We talked for hours and laughed and smoked She said "This has been so fun, I can't wait for you to stay" She guided me home by soaring through the stars and splashing each other with clouds I couldn't stop laughing everything is so amazing Then our adventure came to a close She said, "I'll be back and you stay strong"

Then I awoke to a cold hospital and a beeping monitor sick lights sick of this Bubbling artificial chemicals getting played off as medicine Old cuts and sores Pressure on my chest but not enough to die A mask helping or hindering my breathing I'm not quite sure now I was afraid to look up but I did anyway To find an unkind greeting from the ceiling blocking my view above a tear falling to the side But I don't care Before I find a way to go again I'd like to lay here and remember how it all felt To be apart of the stars And be greeted by kindness up high I'd like to remember How I fell in love with the sky

[alexandratheangel]

You know why I like being high?

So here

I cough a little and that sucks

And maybe I can't fully sit my head up

Because it feels so goddamn heavy

And my neck is stressed

And maybe my hands are numb

So yea it's hard to type

But I feel so good

Like that shit just won't bug me

I think I have lock jaw

But it doesn't hurt as bad

And I haven't received a text from him

Since I told him how I felt

That doesn't hurt as bad either

My mom isn't around

But right now it doesn't feel as empty to be without her

Nothing goes away

It's there

But I don't have to feel it

Think it

Lie with it

Cry for it

Feel rage towards it

I can be

And rationalize

Reminisce on things I never thought would leave

And feel a little happy about it

About something from back then