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[alexabeta]

in the last few days i have had comments on choices complaining about smoking and underage drinking like. let me write about my vices in PEACE. yes i am trying to corrupt the youth actually. i think u should all be drinking and smoking 24/7. brush your teeth with a bottle of jack as the great philosopher kesha once said.

[alexabeta]

New Beginnings: A Choices Prompt Story

This is for the prompt challenge hosted by @choicesprompts. Anyone who hasn't seen the prompt and wants to play along, go here.

Series: Ride or Die Fanfiction

Fandom: Ride or Die

Pairing: Logan x Ellie

Rating: G

Warnings for this chapter: none

Word Count: 1,259

A/N: I know I already submitted one, but I had two ideas for this prompt. I decided to write them both.

My other stuff: Master List.

The cool wind pushes my hair back as I walk along the familiar path, every step taking me deeper into the past. It’s been years since I’ve been here, everything is different, everything is the same.

I’m not paying attention to the present as I walk, I’m too lost in memories of the past. That’s why I don’t notice the other person walking toward me until I hear a familiar voice call my name.

I freeze. It can’t be. What are the odds? I lift my head and my eyes dart wildly around before finally landing on a face I’d recognize anywhere, even now.

“It’s you.”

“Hey troublemaker.” He gives me that lopsided grin that has haunted my dreams for the last decade.

“Logan!” My breath stops, I freeze to the spot. My heart starts pounding in my chest. How? How does he still affect me like this all these years later?

I didn’t expect to find him here, but maybe I should have. The spot where Kaneko’s garage used to be is empty now. The entire block has changed. At least, part of it has. One side of the street is exactly how I remember it. The corner store, the donut shop, the car wash down at the end. The other side is completely new. Nothing I remember still stands, torn down, demolished, the town has moved on. The Chinese take out place is now a cell phone store, the massage parlor is gone, there’s a laundry mat there now. And the gaping hole where the garage used to be mirrors the one in my heart.

I haven’t moved on. I should have, years ago. I finished college, moved from one coast to the other, again, for law school. Worked here and there the first two years after I got my Doctor of Jurisprudence. I just moved back home to open my own law firm. I put a down payment on a house. My dad offered to let me move back home, save money, have home cooked meals when I get home from work. But I couldn’t do it, I can’t. I still blame him for a lot of what happened. I’m here, in this town, because of his failing health. That’s the best I can do for him. Things are still strained between us.

I’ve had many relationships since my formative one. Most of them transient, a few of them longer lasting, but they always end for the same reason. None of them are him. I’ve tried, I really have. There was even a misguided year long fling with Colt right after I’d moved back to the west coast to attend UCLA. Colt somehow made me feel closer to Logan. It wasn’t fair to him; it wasn’t fair to me, and it ended with bitterness and recriminations.

I know what my reasons are for being back here, in this town. I know what drew me to this particular city block this afternoon. But I don’t understand why he’s here, how he’s here.

“Say something Ellie.” His voice is soft, beseeching. He looks nervous, off kilter, vulnerable, and I want to run to him, but I don’t.

“Where have you been for the last ten years?” I sound argumentative, even to my own ears. I don’t care. He broke me. I can’t be broken again. I won’t.

“Prison, for a while. Your dad didn’t tell you?”

“What? No!”

Something hardens in his features, “I shouldn’t be surprised. I don’t suppose you got my letters, either?”

“What?” I feel tears spring unbidden to my eyes.

“I wanted to get out from under it all. I turned myself in, cut a deal, turned state’s evidence. I ran for the first two years, but I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I wanted out from under all of it. I wanted to come back to you a functioning member of society. I did two years then spent another year in a halfway house. I got my GED; I got into community college and got a two-year degree in automotive technology.”

I do the math in my head, “What about the last three years?”

He watches me with a guarded expression before quietly replying, “I’ve been here. Waiting.”

“Waiting for what?” I feel a lump form in my throat. What is he saying?

“You.” He looks away, unable or unwilling to meet my eyes.

“Me?” It was true that I’d been bouncing all over the country for the last couple of years, and I’d been busy. Too busy to bother to update social media. Has he really been here, all this time, waiting for me to come back?

“Yeah. I have a job and an apartment now. I come down here every day, just because. I’ve run into Colt a few times.” He rubs the back of his neck nervously.

Colt. That fucking bastard. He has my contact information. He could have told me Logan was in town, but of course he didn’t. He wouldn’t.

“So…what? You moved back here for me? You come down here every day on the off chance that one day you’d run into me?”

A flush creeps up his neck, “I drive by your dad’s house sometimes too. God, I’m sorry. That makes me sound like a stalker, doesn’t it?”

“Logan, I….” I feel so many emotions well up inside me, tears gather in the corners of my eyes. This is literally everything I’ve wanted to hear for the last ten years. I’ve played out so many fantasies about this moment in my head, but I never thought it would actually happen.

“It’s ok, Ellie. I get it. It was ten years ago. I’m sure you’ve moved on. You’re probably married or something. I just…I just wanted to see you, know that you’re ok. I’ll go.”

He turns to leave, and the air rushes out of my world, the sun stops shinning. Again. “Logan, wait!”

He turns back, a guarded, but hopeful, expression on his face. “Yeah?”

I shrug, “Have dinner with me? Catch up?”

It’s a start. A beginning, maybe. It’s something, after years of nothing.

A hesitant smile pulls his lips up, “Really?”

“Really.” I finally move, closing the distance between us. The moment I’m within reach, he pulls me into his arms, hugging me tighter than I’ve ever been hugged.

“I’ve missed you so much!” He whispers into my hair.

I return the hug with just as much vigor, tears finally spilling down my cheeks. I pull away and wipe at my face. I take his hand in mine and tug him down the street, “Come on. I know a place.”

I check him out as we walk. He’s older. So am I. His hair is shorter, his smile is the same. The smile that’s haunted my dreams for the last decade. His face, his eyes, the callouses on his roughened hands, all the things that have taken up residence in my memory and made lasting relationships with other men impossible. It’s him. It’s always been him. A sudden certainty washes over me, the low-level anxiety that has buzzed insistently in the background of my mind, of my life, is suddenly just gone as a sense of rightness floods through me.

I smile up at him as we reach the restaurant and he pulls the door open for me, “I’m not married.”

His smile broadens, “That’s good news for me. You knew the boy I was, Ellie. I hope you let me show you the man I’ve become.”

“I can’t think of anything I’d like more.”

~~~~~~~

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[alexabeta]

Back Home

Book: The Nanny Affair Book 2

Characters: Sam Dalton x Marie Castro (MC), Robin Flores, Mason Dalton, Mickey Dalton, Carter

Word Count: 3,064

Rating/Warnings: ⚠️ Some parts contain -> NSFW 🍋, Adult Language ⛔️⛔️ Smut, Angst

Description: After spending the rest of the summer in Italy, Sam, Marie and the boys head back home. Will the fallout of Sam's wedding to Sofia finally catch up to them? Was their happiness short lived?

A/N: Before the first chapter of The Nanny Affair Book 2 was released, the wonderful TNA group gave the 'challenge' what if you were to write how chapter 1 would go back in June. PB had already released that a new nanny was wanted. It was a fun theory to want a new nanny (manny) to make Sam jealous after book one. And we get the new nanny line!! *Sam over Jordan any day of the week* Here is my version of chapter 1.

Characters belong to Pixelberry

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flashing lights of the cameras blind us. The paparazzi stepping closer and closer to Sam, Mason, Mickey and I as we make our way towards the door of our home. A few more steps and we’ll be safe in the lobby and on our way towards the penthouse.

“How does it feel being a home wrecker?’ A small man with salt and pepper asks as he pushes closer to us.

‘Sam, why would you leave Sofia at the altar?’ Someone else shouts from the right of us. ‘Is she really worth you losing Dalton Enterprises?’

A younger photographer stops in front of the boys, shoving his camera in their faces trying to get a reaction out of them. ‘What do you think of your dad sleeping with your nanny?’

“Dad!” Mason and Mickey call out for Sam, rushing to his side. Letting go of my hand instantly, Sam takes their small hands in his. A hard expression sets in on his face “You need to back the fu..” He stops to compose himself before he says something he’ll regret and is spread all over the tabloids. “Back away. Let us through.” Sam pushes his way through the throng of cameras, taking the boys with him as he enters the lobby.

A hand wraps around my arm but before I can fight back I hear Carter. “Ms. Marie, I got you. Let’s get you inside.” Carter steps in front acting as a shield from the paparazzi making way for us to get into the building.

Once Carter and I make it into the lobby, Sam is bent down on his knee comforting Mason and Mickey as they bury their face into his chest. “It’s ok. Everything will be ok. I promise you both, I will make this right.” He tells them.

“Sam.” I call out in a whisper.

Getting up from the floor, he doesn’t bother turning to face me and begins to walk towards the elevator. Mason and Mickey at his side waiting for the doors to open. Not one of them turns back to me, not one of the three inviting me to be apart of their family embrace.

Was choosing me the right choice for Sam? Or was our return home and coming back to reality, the beginning of the end? Watching as the elevator doors open and close once they step in. A family of three, a father and his sons, dealing with the backlash from Sam and I giving into our desires.

***

Turbulence jolts me awake. “Hey, it’s ok. I got you.” Sam wraps his arms around me, placing a kiss on my forehead. Inching closer to him, wrapping a leg around his waist as we lay in bed on our flight back to New York. Placing my head on his chest, hearing his heart beat begins to calm me from the dream I just had.

His hand tenderly running up and down my back. “Do you want to talk about?” He asks.

“It was nothing, just a bad dream.” I tell him, closing my eyes trying to forget about it. Sam lets out an exasperated breath, “It’s not nothing Marie. You’ve had these bad dreams the last few days.”

I can’t tell Sam about the dream that I keep having. Was I really worth all this trouble? Putting the boys through all of this, they surely know that I love their Dad. Sam has kept telling me he loves me and I am the one he wants since the accident in Italy.

“So we’re going with the silent treatment?” Sam asks.

Looking up to see his grey eyes staring down at me. “Really you want to go down the silent treatment way? Who was ready to run away to Italy after our first time together.” Throwing the whole gala night at him.

“I told you that the timing wasn’t the best. I wasn't running away after finally making you mine. Don’t you think I’d go back and do it differently if I could.” He says lifting my chin so are lips are faintly touching.

“I know. But it was nothing, just a dream. Nothing really. I’ll be…We’ll be ok.” smiling against his lips

“Yes, we will. I promise no matter what comes at us, we will face it together.” He presses his lips softly against mine. Letting out a soft moan, he deepens the kiss slipping his tongue past my lips.

Sam’s hands begin to roam over my body, grabbing my waist and pulling me on top of him. Taking the hint and sitting up on his lap, my hands run down his sculpted chest. Playing with waistband of his briefs,

“Are you going to do something with those hands?” Sam lets out in a heated breath, desire in his stare.

Feeling his cock twitch against me. Leaning down, kissing along his jaw up to his lips. Taking his bottom lip between my teeth, as my hand runs over his stiffening cock. “You know exactly what these hands can do.” He groans as I take him in my hand.

His hands are on me instantly, cupping my breast over my thin gray sleeping tank. His thumbs teasing my nipples to peaks.

“Sam.” I moan, tossing my head back.

Sam sits up, his lips are on my skin, placing hot kisses on my collarbone, lowering the strap down my arm and kissing my shoulder. “Tell..” kiss… “me..” kiss “what you…” kiss “want Marie.”

Stopping his kisses against my skin, pulling back slightly. Running my hand through his hair, looking at him “You. I want you. The good, the bad… I want all of you Sam.”

“I’m all yours Marie.” Sam rolls me back onto the bed, running his hand up my inner thigh. His fingertips teasing the outline of my panties, moving them to the side. His touch teasing my wet pussy.

Arching my body up to meet his touch, Sam slides a finger inside. “Always so wet and ready for me.” He whispers against my skin, my body responding to Sam’s fingers moving between my legs, wanting more.

Always wanting more.

“Oh..god..please..” My moans are silenced by his lips, his kisses becoming hungrier with need. His fingers never stopping, bringing me closer with each movement. Sam lowers a strap of my top, lowering it just under my breast, he taking one into his mouth. His tongue swirling around my nipple “Sam..I need you inside me..!” I call out.

There’s a knock at the door, stopping us, our attention focused on the door. My heart races with anticipation of the door to be opened and whoever is on the other side catch us in a rather compromising position..

“Fuck..” He whispers against my skin. “Be right there.” Sam calls out.

Laughing out loud at our current situation, Sam gets off the bed and begins to dress. “You find this funny Ms. Castro?” He smirks. Fixing my top, I get up on my knees, making my way towards the edge of the bed.

Sam stands inches from me, adjusting himself, fixing his clothes. “Extremely funny, Mr. Dalton.” A ridiculously wide smile spreads across my face.

In one quick movement, Sam has his hand at the nape of my neck, his lips crash against mine hard. “I’ll see you outside, Love.”

My eyes open at the departure of his lips from mine, letting out a frustrated sigh as Sam walks out, closing the door behind him.

******

Upon landing back in New York, I prepare myself for the media frenzy. But nothing, no clicks of the camera, no questions thrown at us. To say I was surprised at not having to deal with cameras capturing our every movement would be an understatement. Relief sets in and I begin to relax a bit. But those dreams keep playing in my mind, unable to shake them off.

Exiting the plane, the New York morning sunlight greets us. The humidity and heat starting early in the last days of August. Once everything is loaded into the car, Carter drives us home. Mickey seated beside me, Sam in front of us next to the door with Mason asleep in his arms. Mickey leans into me, wrapping his arm around my waist, he snuggles into a more comfortable position. Placing an arm around him, he finally settles in and begins to doze off.

“Are you happy to be home?” I ask Sam, staring out the window, seeing the city come into view.

“Home is wherever the four us are Marie.” He responds tenderly.

A faint smile comes across my face, my attention still looking out the window at the city. Silence falls between us, unsure of how long it took to get home, until we pull into the parking structure of our building.

“Hey…” Sam finally breaks the silence.

“Hey.”

“Sir. We are here. I’ll make sure everything is taken up to the penthouse.” Carter announces.

The both of us unaware Carter had rolled down the partition once we came to a stop.

“Thank you, Carter. Do you mind helping Marie with Mickey?”

“Not at all Sir.” Carter gets out and makes his way to open the door for us.

Sam hugs a sleeping Mason a bit closer to him, “Marie, stop over thinking things, get out of that head of yours. Everything will be ok.” He sounds so sure of what he is saying, I begin to believe it myself.

“You can trust me.. I love you.” He reassures me before stepping and getting out of the car.

“I love you too.” Murmuring against a sleeping Mickey.

******

Tossing the last of the boys freshly washed clothes into the drier, Muscular arms wrap around me from behind, “Aaah..” jumping back against them and hitting his toned body. “Jesus, you scared me.”

“Sorry, didn’t mean too.” Sam tightens his grip around me.

“Did you come into the laundry room to help?”

“Well..not really.” He chuckles. “You didn’t have to start unpacking and washing the boys clothes right away.” Sam states. “We could have rested a bit before starting.” He begins to kiss down my neck.

Leaning my head back against his shoulder, sighing “Hmm… would it just be resting?”

Sam groans. “You know I’d be up for anything?”

Turning around, Sam’s gaze burning with desire greets me. “Easy there.” Placing a hand against his chest, gently pushing him back. “We’ve been gone for a while and there are things I would like to get ahead of.”

He bows his head in defeat. “Alright, I guess you’re right.”

“You guess?” Raising in eyebrow. “Well, I hate to break it to you…” Closing the small distance between us and wrapping my arms around him. “But I’m always right.”

Sam lets out a hearty laugh, “I don’t get a say in this?”

“Nope!”

We stand holding each other in the laundry room not saying a word. Content with his arms wrapped around me, our hearts beating as one.

“Marie, there is something I want to talk to you about.” He whispers into my hair.

“Oh?”

Leaning back, a look settles on his face, one that is trying to figure out how to tell me what he wants to talk about.

“Everything ok?”

“We should talk in my office.” He takes my hand in his and begins to lead us out. “I don’t want the boys to wake up and walk in on what I want to tell you.” Calling back to me.

“Alright, but you do know that they don’t go into the laundry room.” Trying to make light of the current situation. No chuckle, nothing. It must be serious, I think to myself.

We make our way to his office, Sam steps aside to let me in. Closing the door behind us, I turn and face him as he runs his hand through his hair. A habit, I've come to know he does when he is nervous.

“You’re beginning to worry me?” I tell him, folding my arms under my chest.

“I’ll stop beating around the bush. I want us to hire a new nanny for Mason and Mickey.” He tells me, his face is unreadable, unable to see if he is joking or not.

“Why?” Feeling a bit hurt at the thought of not being able to take care of Mason and Mickey anymore.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Sam takes a step closer.

“Look at you like what?” Stepping back as he moves closer.

“Hurt.” Taking another step closer.

“How can I not be hurt Sam? That’s what I do. I’m the boys nanny. Remember that’s what I was hired to do.” Not moving as he takes another step forward.

“I’ve already told you that you are more than just a nanny…” He pauses. “At first, yes I did hire you as their nanny but you’re much more, you’ve become a part of this family. The love of my life.”

Turning my back to him, looking out the windows of his office. “I can still take care of them. Besides I don’t think hiring someone new for the boys would be a good idea.”

Before he can answer, the elevator chimes to announce someone has arrived. Turning back and looking at Sam who has the same confused look on his face as I do.

“Who the hell can that be?” Turning and making his way out of the office, I follow not too far behind.

“Hey Sammy! I thought you two might be 'busy' and here I come to interrupt.” Robin greets us.

“What are you doing here Robin?” Sam asks him.

“Is that a way to welcome your brother?” Greeting Sam with a hug, taking the chance to wink at me behind Sam’s back.

I roll my eyes at him. “What can we do for you Robin?”

“Look at you Marie, that was fast, already taking charge of the household.” He laughs “I just came to talk, in peace if you will. We both messed up in Italy. Some more than others." He points at both of us. "Remember I help handle PR for Dalton Enterprises. And we need a good spin on this because, we are in the shits.”

Sam reaches back and taking my hand in his, bringing me to stand next to him. “We were actually discussing something important. Whatever plan you came to talk about the three of us can discuss about it come Monday.”

Ignoring Sam, Robing pats him on the shoulder as he walks towards the family room, turning back and smiling “Whatever you say Sammy. You are in charge, at least for now.”

Sam and I are left standing there, looking at each other not knowing how to respond to him. “Come on. We should at least entertain him and see what he is up too.” Leading him into the family room after Robin.

Watching as Robin takes a seat on the sofa, feeling very much at home, he has this cheshire cat smile spread across his face.

“How is the happy couple?” He asks, looking at Sam then at me. “What? Trouble in paradise already?” Robin jokes.

“Like I said we will discuss our situation come Monday.” a frustrated Sam answers him.

“You told her already right?”

Sam hesitates to respond.

Realizing Sam and Robin had already discussed the hiring of the nanny thing before Sam even mentioned it to me.

“We were just talking about that before you made your surprised appearance.” Speaking up before Sam can say anything.

Sam’s hand fidgeting in mine, “Robin..”

“We were going to start looking for one together.” Cutting him off. Looking up at Sam with a glare that lets him know that I’m not exactly happy that he discussed this with Robin before me.

“Good.” Robin claps his hands together. “Now that that’s out of the way, the faster we can spin this story in our favor the better. As you know it doesn’t bode well for the other person who doesn’t come out with some sort of statement first in situations like this.”

“What are you doing?” Sam at last speaks up.

Ignoring Sam, Robin continues “Dalton Enterprises and Russo Industries can say no comment for so long, before the rumor mills start going again.”

“What are you doing?” Sam repeats himself. “I won’t ask again.”

“Me? or her?” Robin points at me. “We all know who she is doing.”

“Don’t you dare start with this shit again.” Sam angrily raising his voice.

“I kid, I kid. Learn to take a joke. At least I slept with someone with status, not the help.” Robin laughs.

Sam and I just stand there not doing or saying anything. Looking at Sam as he takes a deep breath trying to calm the anger that is building up and then at Robin, sitting there with ease enjoying that he is getting Sam riled up.

“Relax. Just another joke, god you guys are dull.” Robin gets up and stands a few feet away from us, straightening up. “You want to know why, Sam. Fine, I'll tell you. Don’t forget that I’m also up for the CEO position, in case you royally fucked up. And hate to break it to you but you royally fucked up.”

“As did you.” Sam answers.

Robin takes a step closer, “True, but something like that is not shocking coming from me. You should know that. And to show that I’m a team player, I’ll let you in on my plan before I go.” He grins at us.

“How kind of you.” I answer sarcastically.

“Well my dear Marie, when I take over and I will be taking over Dalton Enterprises. I still want it to be one of the best companies that is out there. It’s to my benefit to make sure we survive this. That way Sammy here can’t say I played dirty and took it from him.” Winking at us.

Sam reaches out and grips Robin by his arm “ You will never get this company, no matter how much you try. I’ll make sure of it.” Gritting through his teeth.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less Sam.” He responds pulling out of Sam’s grip. “Oh and good luck finding a new nanny.” Robin says as he walks away.

“Dad!? We’re getting a new nanny?” Mason and Mickey say in unison announcing their presence. Sam and I turn and see them standing by the doorway, wiping the sleep from their eyes.

“Are you leaving us again Marie?” Mickey ask with sadness in his voice.

“Of course not. I’m not going anywhere.” I try and comfort them both with my words. And at that moment I believed that I’d be in their lives forever.

“Oops.. sorry didn’t mean to be the one to break it you kiddos” Robin ruffles Mason’s hair as he makes his exit.

Leaving us with two boys standing there looking at us with tears building up in their eyes. Waiting for us to explain something we haven’t even started discussing.

[alexabeta]

Immortal Desires Drabble (Cas &/x Saini)

Thank you @aallotarenunelma for participating in this month’s writer event and for writing the loveliest of stories. Especially those that aren’t often featured in our fandom! You (and your writing) are amazing 😘

Warnings & A/N: This was the last drabble I wrote for this event because I could legit not decide which of your MCs to write for, Saini or Soile. Ultimately, I had to pick one so I hope you enjoy.

Saini turned onto their back, staring at the ceiling, failing to sleep. They sigh heavily and glance towards the clock. It’s late. No, it’s early but still dark. Their eyes glance back at the ceiling.

Plink.

They flip back over onto their side and let out another sigh, ignoring the sound.

Plink. Plink.

They sit up and listen closer to the noise.

Plink.

They turn towards the window as yet another people hits the window.

They throw back the covers and walk to the window, looking out to find Cas standing in the dimly lit front yard with a handful of small bits of gravel.

Saini opens the window only to be hit with one right in the forehead.

“Ow!” they rub their forehead.

“Oh, shit. You okay?" Cas whispers loudly.

“What on earth are you doing, besides trying to injure people with rocks to their forehead?” Saini asking, failing to hide their smile from their voice.

“I couldn’t sleep.”

“You don’t sleep at night,” Saini quipped.

“Come down,” Cas half asks, half states.

Saini looks him over a bit considering.

“I know you weren’t sleeping. Come on.”

They walk away from the window and he almost things they are going to ignore him until he hears them moving out of their room and silently down the stairs. Until the front door opens and shuts with barely a squeak and Saini is standing in front of him.

“Follow me,” Cas smiles and begins walking down the street.

Saini follows until they manage to finally catch up and he looks over at them with a grin before turning back to look at their path now veering off the road and into the woods.

He silently grabs their hand in his and says nothing, staring pointedly ahead but a small smirk playing at the corner of his lips.

The two continued on together until Cas atopped in a clearing and pulled Saini down beside him on the cool grass and then laid back in it.

Saini looked between him and the sky and what they saw took their breath away.

The sky was awash in green and purple waves dancing across the sky.

“I didn’t even know-“

“Shhh!” he smirked and pulled them by the shoulder into the grass beside him.

Saini shifted their head onto Cas’s stomach and smiled over at him.

“Stop making this weird, new kid.”

They let out a small chuckle and turned their eyes back to the night sky.

The two lay there, in silence, watching the northern lights paint the sky until they faded and the first rays of sun.

——————————

All Choices Tag: @storyofmychoices @peonierose @aallotarenunelma @inlocusmads

[alexabeta]

tried to make m!cas,… have discount Cas ig 😭

[alexabeta]

Three Little Words

Because Chapter 15 got me in such of lovesick emotional chokehold. Cas out here making me into the biggest, softest marshmallow. 

Ugh, I love him so much.

Y’all know the drill. Black Male!Cassius x Black Female!MC. With a bit of Male!Gabe x Female!MC (one sided, sorry Gabe fans. I like your guys’ idea of poly relationship, but I personally don’t get down like that.)

——————————–

(Cas Harlow)

What a fucking mess.

Just only what felt like mere hours ago, I left the lone survivor of my hunting party. The first time in a long time that I felt powerless.

That I felt scared.

Weak.

…where I felt like I was human.

I thought I wasn’t gonna survive, but no. Those creatures left me there as warning. Laying there in those bushes, barely on the cusp of consciousness, I remember feeling angry. 

Angry that I was beaten so easily. Angry that I was rendered helpless to where my own family was torn apart in some sick ritual. Angry that I didn’t die alongside them.

But it wasn’t until I found myself gazing into Judith’s honey colored eyes that I felt a wave of relief.

If I had died, I wouldn’t have the chance to look into those breathtaking eyes again.

With her support and Golden Boy’s help, we created a plan, tracked down our true enemy, warned the covens, and founded the Creator’s true weakness. 

Only now, he’s grown so powerful to point he rendered both covens injured.

Keep reading

[alexabeta]

Meet Me Halfway

After trading story ideas with @berriesandpixels I had to write this one. So this is just a basic idea of what this is:

Cas and Judith are already in an established relationship, but ever since this news came out, the female population at their school has suddenly started to notice the infamous bad boy. Judith has voiced how the extra attention bothered her to her boyfriend on multiple occasions but he often brushed it off, never seeing how it was bad. It wasn’t until one day, one girl got ballsy and decided to kiss him with Judith being able to see it in plain sight. It’s rare to pissed the girl off, but this would’ve of been one of those moments she saw red. She ends up breaking up with him. Although Cas wouldn’t outwardly admit it, he was deeply hurt by this. He tried to brush it off, but it would prove to be a complete failure. He knew just talking to her wouldn’t work, Judith wouldn’t even bother to glance his way anymore. So, he had to get creative.

Will this be a bit OOC for Cas for a lot of you? Probably. But I’m going off the idea that there was a Cassius before there was Cas. So I’m taking a shot in the dark thinking that he wasn’t always the badass we all know Cas to be.

The two original theme songs was The One Who Got Away and A Thousand Times but I changed it to Meet Me Halfway since I felt like it spoke to Cas’s inner thoughts. But you guys can listen any of the songs, they would reflect how Cas would feel and see Judith in this story.

Keep reading

[alexabeta]

Dear Cas Harlow, how dare you do this to me you’re just a pixel!!

[alexabeta]

‘My Immortal Desire’ 🖤

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Cas and MC first kiss. 🖤

I love so much that soundtrack in a scene, it just suits perfectly ❤️

[alexabeta]

This is what the book's all about. Right?

[alexabeta]

"Want me to kill him for us?"

cas harlow fanart, he's probably one of my top choices LIs. i love him so much. ―

pose ref is paris brosnan ♡

[alexabeta]

The De Facto Queen Chapter One: Queen Without a Crown

Series: The De Facto Queen

Fandom: The Royal Romance

Pairings: Riley x Drake, Riley x Liam

Rating: Teen

Warnings for this chapter: Language

Word Count: 5,355

A/N: Extensive Author's Note

My other stuff: Master List.

Unity Tour, Day 2, Portavira

Riley handed the color-coded, tabbed, and thick as a copy of War and Peace dossier back to Madeleine, “I appreciate all the hard work you put into this, Madeleine. And since you’ve done such a thorough job, I trust you to fill me in on the most pertinent details so that I don’t have to wade through all of this.”

Things had been crazy since Drake had been released from the hospital. There had been a press conference announcing their engagement, wedding planners had practically taken up residence at the palace, and there had been an entire security detail assigned to Riley that had taken some getting used to. She wasn’t accustomed to having people follow her everywhere she went. She had protested that it certainly wasn’t necessary inside the palace but both Liam and Drake had overruled her.

She had wanted to move into Valtoria as soon as possible but again she’d been overruled by both men who insisted that the estate be fortified and locked down as securely as the palace itself prior to her taking up residence.

These two men were going to be the death of her.

Drake, though still recovering from a bullet wound, had thrown himself vigorously into building her security team, as well as the one for Valtoria and he was both meticulously exacting and excruciatingly detailed oriented.

Liam seemed determined to make her queen in all but name. Her security detail wasn’t being called a queen’s guard, but it followed the exact structure of one. She was privy to details no one outside of herself and Liam knew. She received the same daily intelligence briefings as the king. She was given security clearances and thrust headlong into ruling.

No one seem to question why Cordonia’s newest duchess, the one that had been a commoner and a foreigner mere months ago, was ruling by the king’s side. Why she, and not any of the Cordonian-born noblewomen, had been given the privileges and responsibilities of the crown.

No one but Riley herself.

She assumed, and Drake verified, that it was because Liam trusted her, and he needed a ruling partner. It was too great a job for one person alone, that was the whole reason for the marriage provision in the succession laws in the first place.

She wanted to help. Drake may have been the man she said yes to, but Liam still held a special place in her heart, and she would never be able to tell him no about anything again. Not after saying no to the biggest, most important thing he had ever asked of her and shattering his heart into a million pieces in the process.

The memory of that night still physically hurt whenever it pushed its way into her consciousness. Staying busy actually helped distract her from that, and from the fact that her fiancée had almost died when he had taken a bullet meant for her. Those first hours when she thought she might lose him had nearly destroyed her. If she sat still too long, the fact that the perpetrator was still out there somewhere started to eat away at her, gnawing at her sense of safety and threatening her very sanity.

So, she’d thrown herself headlong into the business of governing.

Preparations for the Five Kingdom’s Festival, planning the Unity Tour, and being brought up to speed on the investigation into the attack at the Homecoming Ball had kept her in seemingly endless meetings with Liam, The Royal Council, and the heads of the Cordonian Armed Forces.

All that was on top of scheduling engagement pictures, the engagement party, private fittings for a custom-made dress, picking out flowers, and cake…… thank god she had Hana and Max to run point on all things wedding related. Still, the final decisions rested in her hands.

Then the attack on the orchards had happened, thrusting her somehow into a public relations role. Her, of all people. She attended meetings in the situation room with Liam and Drake, conferred with the palace’s PR team, scoured intelligence briefings, and made public statements to the press, hoping that she had found the right words to calm and reassure the people. Even though she herself often felt far from calm or assured of anything.

But the most difficult thing she’d done by far was swallowing her pride and convincing Madeleine to work for her.

Now she was standing in front of a full-length mirror having a strategy meeting with the woman that had been the bane of her existence for the entirety of the engagement tour, while Max held up dresses for her approval and Hana picked out her accessories.

“This one is the Ebrim house colors!” Max enthused.

“You haven’t steered me wrong yet,” Riley took the dress out of his hands and tried it on.

She admired herself in the mirror. The floor-length purple dress was sparkly with a plunging neckline, putting her cleavage on prominent display. She twisted one way then the other checking out how the dress hugged her curves before nodding in approval, “This is the one!”

She was rewarded an hour later when she exited the dressing room and saw her future husband’s face light up.

Drake had been waiting for her in the private train car. He was standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall, phone in hand when he heard the door slide open. His eyes flicked from the phone screen to his fiancée, then back to the phone screen before jerking up to find her again. He fumbled the phone, barely keeping it in his grasp as his eyes raked greedily down her body, “Riley! Wow!”

“You like it?” She smiled as she spun to give him the full effect.

“Like it?” He pushed away from the wall and pocketed the phone so he could pull her into his arms, “That dress nearly killed me! Are you sure it’s not overkill for an informal dinner?”

“Oh honey, nothing involving crown business is ever really informal,” she told him as she tipped her head to the side to give him access to her neck.

He knew the drill. No mussing up the hair and makeup before a royal event. After, and sometimes even during if they could sneak away, all bets were off. But perfection was required for making a proper entrance.

There was no lipstick to smear on the side of her neck and he loved the way she shivered when he peppered it with kisses. Her low moan and the feel of her body trembling in his arms just pushed his anticipation for the end of the night higher.

“Fuck, baby,” he whispered in her ear, “you have no idea the torture you put me through…”

“Oh, I have some idea,” she told him with a teasing smile as she pulled away, “You look pretty good yourself, Walker.”

Drake shook his head with a laugh at the reference to the suit he was wearing. The button-down shirt wasn’t a far cry from his usual, just dressier than denim. The jacket and slacks were an upgrade, but he still refused to wear a tie.

She didn’t care what he wore. The denim was fine with her. He was the one determined to fit into a world he’d always hated.

For her.

She sighed as she ran a hand down his chest and thought, not for the first time, that maybe she should have declined Liam’s request for help with…well, everything.

But she wanted to help him. She wanted to be involved. She liked making a difference in the world. And as it turned out, she was good at it! She fit seamlessly into Liam’s world.

But where did that leave her husband to be, she wondered as she watched him fidget with the collar of his shirt. It was sweet that he was willing to push himself outside his comfort zone for her, but she didn’t like that he felt like he had to.

She reached up and undid the top button, “Let yourself breathe babe.”

“I just don’t want to do anything to embarrass you tonight.”

“You couldn’t if you tried. I love you. Now, come on before we’re late, Liam is probably already out front waiting on us.”

Liam was indeed standing next to the limo when they exited the train. His face went slack when he saw her, “Riley! You look amazing!”

“Thank you,” she felt her face color not at the compliment as much as the obvious effect she was having on her former lover. She shot a glance sideways at Drake to see if it upset him but he didn’t seem to notice.

Liam recovered quickly, smoothing his face back into polite monarch mode and giving her a chaste peck on the cheek before helping her into the limo and then sliding in after her. He took the seat across from her. Drake slipped into the seat next to her.

Drake talked about the deep-sea fishing off the coast of Portavira as they drove. Riley’s eyes lifted slowly to meet Liam’s. It wasn’t the first time she had caught him staring at her with frank unadorned longing on his face. The sexual tension still hung in the air between them, so thick it was almost suffocating and how her intended never noticed it was beyond her.

The yearning disappeared from his face as he composed it into a cordial smile the moment he noticed her looking, but the damage had been done. Warmth had already exploded inside her, heating her blood and making her heart race. She glanced quickly away and slipped her hand into Drake’s to steady herself.

She had made her choice and she was in love with the man she had committed to. Drake gave her everything she could ask for from a man and so much more. He was loyal and brave, funny and kind, intelligent and endearing. He centered her, he calmed her, he grounded her. She loved everything about him. The deep rumbling of his voice, the way his hair fell in his eyes but he refused to cut it, the way he talked with his hands when something excited him, the way he loved with his whole heart. She loved his snarkiness, his sharp, witty repartee that kept her on her toes and she loved the tender, soul-baring honesty of the declarations he whispered to her when no one else was around to hear. She loved him.

But Liam still ignited a fire within her with every glance, every seemingly innocent touch and she had no idea what to do about it other than ignore it and hope it went away.

“How does that sound?” Drake asked as the car coasted to a stop in front of the seaside restaurant they were meeting the Ebrims at.

“That sounds lovely,” Riley responded, hoping it was the right answer.

“Great! I’ll find out where I can rent a boat for tomorrow night!”

Greetings and pleasantries were exchanged, seats were taken, orders were placed and the conversation turned to the weather.

“You’ve probably seen the news about the wedding,” Drake said as a way to segue into the topic they were really there to discuss.

“We have! Congratulations to both of you,” Landon responded.

“Thank you,” Riley beamed at him, “We would like to personally extend an invitation to all of you!”

While Liam and Riley attempted to sway the Ebrims toward attending the wedding, the waiters sat piping hot bread bowls filled with steaming bisque in front of them.

Drake started to tear off a piece of his bread bowl but froze as his eyes flitted around the table. Everyone else was eating the bisque with a spoon. He sighed as he picked up his own spoon, wondering what the point of a bread bowl was if you weren’t going to eat it.

“This is a nice place you’ve got here,” Drake commented when there was a lull in the conversation.

“The restaurant?” Landon asked, “We don’t own the restaurant.”

“No, of course not,” Drake stammered, “I just meant the whole duchy. It’s very nice.”

“It is quite lovely,” Hana agreed.

“And this food is amazing!” Max added, “Kudos to the chef!”

“Thank you,” Landon smiled at them, “This is my favorite restaurant, because of the food and the view.”

“It’s an amazing view!” Drake agreed, “It would make a great painting or postcard! I’d love to have a postcard of this place!”

“We don’t have…er, postcards..” Emmeline gave him a puzzled look.

“I just meant it’s a great view…” Drake trailed off in frustration. This was why he hated socializing. It was stupid.

He sighed as he leaned back in his chair. Fuck it. He tore off a chunk of bread and dunked it in the bisque before bringing it to his mouth. He closed his eyes briefly in appreciation as he chewed. Delicious!

That’s how you were supposed to deal with a bread bowl. He met Riley’s eyes across the table. She was biting back an amused smile, her eyes sparkling with mirth. He had to repress one of his own as he shook his head ever so slightly.

One glance and he knew that she knew the exact thoughts that had spilled through his brain. She really got him. And she shared his disdain for the superficial, hypocritical bullshit of court. The difference between them was that she knew how to play the game and could do it without letting it get to her.

Catty, backstabbing, and backhanded compliments rolled right off her. She suffered fools patiently with a serene smile pasted on her face. She charmed and coaxed the nobility, she turned fence-sitters into allies and enemies into fence-sitters. And she did it all without the extensive lifelong training that Leo and Liam had received.

Not that those lessons had taken in Leo’s case.

As angry as Drake had once been at Leo, he recognized that Riley would never have come into his life otherwise. If Liam hadn’t been thrust into the role of crown prince, they never would have been in New York that night. He couldn’t regret that.

Riley’s attention was pulled from Drake as the conversation turned to the devastating floods that had recently ravaged the port community.

She was instantly on alert. This was something they could use. Her eyes met Liam’s over her water glass. He gave her an imperceptible nod. She knew they were thinking the same thing. They were perfectly in tune like that. They made a formidable diplomatic team. Turning to Landon, she asked, “Is there anything we can do to help?”

“I’ve allocated crown resources of course,” Liam added, “but if there’s anything Riley and I can personally do…”

“We’re here to help.” She finished his sentence.

Liam felt pride stir in his chest. She had them. She always did. He had never worked a room with anyone as in synch with him as she was. Not Leo, not his father, no one. They made an unstoppable team and he regretted that he had ever questioned her suitability for the role.

The way she had handled the press after the attack on the orchards had cemented for him just how perfect she was for the role. When she had told the press, and the public, that “No true king would give in to their demands!” he had known then and there that she was exactly the woman he needed by his side.

His father had been wrong. The council had been wrong. She was perfect for the role. She was perfect for him.

But she wasn’t his.

His eyes flicked across the table to Drake, taking in the way his best friend’s eyes lingered on her, the soft, contented smile on his face as he watched her and he felt guilt, anger, and loss punch him in the gut in rapid succession.

The dinner wrapped up with promises for Riley and Liam and their entourage to join the charity polo match the following day. As everyone prepared to leave for the Ebrim estate, Liam pulled Riley to the side, “That was very well done.”

“Thank you, but I know I’m not quite at your level.”

“What are you talking about?” Drake walked up behind her, slipping his arms around her waist.

“I was just complimenting Riley on her diplomacy skills,” Liam smothered his irritation. Drake was with her nearly every minute of the day. All Liam wanted was a few moments of her time, a few crumbs of her attention.

Riley smiled as she ran her hands along the arms that encircled her, “And I was telling him that I feel like I still need some work. My nonverbal communication could use some polishing.”

“Well, I think you’re perfect!” Drake kissed her neck, just behind her ear.

“Mm,” Riley smiled and relaxed back into him.

Liam cleared his throat, “Yes, well... Riley does display a natural propensity for diplomacy, but she could benefit from a crash course in body language management.”

“Yes!” Riley agreed.

“I would be more than happy to give you a few pointers. Right now, if you like. So you’re more prepared for tomorrow.”

“That would be great, Liam!”

“Okay,” Drake released her, “I’ll meet you back at the Ebrim’s.”

“Wait, you’re leaving?”

Drake’s eyes went to Liam and back to Riley, “Yeah…I don’t think I’m required for this. We all know that I’m never going to be good at it no matter how many pointers Liam has to offer.”

“I’ll wait over there,” Liam pointed toward the nearest dock, “while you say goodbye.”

Riley spun in Drake’s arms, “Diplomacy isn’t your strong suit. That’s why you don’t do it, remember?”

He combed his fingers through her hair as he spoke, “Yeah, but…I just want to be an asset to you, Riley, not an embarrassment…”

“Oh, Drake, you big marshmallow, you could never be an embarrassment! Are you kidding me? I prefer you just the way you are, rough edges and all!”

“Really?”

“Really!” She went up on her tiptoes, bringing her lips to his.

He returned the kiss with all the passion she’d come to expect from him. He showed his love through physical touch and acts of service. He wasn’t great with words, but god did he know how to let his body do the talking for him.

“I love you the way you are,” she told him when she pulled away, “You don’t need to change for me. Besides, you’re good at so many other things.”

“Oh yeah, like what?”

“Security for one. You’re a genius at it. Do you think Liam knows what securing the perimeter or shoring up the flank means?”

“Yes.”

“Would he know how to do either thing?”

“No.”

“And he sure doesn’t have your extensive knowledge of weapons, or horses, or martial arts, does he?”

“Yeah, but-“

“But nothing, mister! I’m the one that agreed to help Liam with all the crown business, not you. There’s no reason you have to be good at any of this!”

“I just don’t want you to think I don’t care about the things that are important to you!”

“And I don’t want you to feel like you have to change for me,” she insisted.

“Okay, you’re right,” he sighed with relief, “Does that mean I don’t have to do any more of these fancy dinners?”

“Not if you don’t want to! But you do have to play polo tomorrow, sorry.”

“Meh. Smacking a ball with a mallet is more up my alley than worrying about which fork I’m using anyway. And there are horses involved, so I’m all good!”

“Good! Now kiss me again before you leave!”

She was a little breathless when they pulled apart. He made her go weak in the knees and the cocky grin on his face told her that he knew it.

“I’ll be waiting at Penelope’s,” he whispered in her ear before glancing up and giving Liam a wave goodbye.

She watched him walk away then turned and made her way to the railing next to the dock where Liam was patiently waiting.

“Everything okay?” He asked.

“Yes, fine,” Riley replied.

“Good! Now, if you’re ready, I’ve taken the liberty of procuring a boat for the evening’s tutorial!” He gestured to what looked to be a sixty-foot yacht waiting at the end of the pier.

“Oh, wow! How did you manage that on literally no notice?”

He gave her a dazzling smile as he offered her his arm, “A man can’t reveal all his secrets, can he?”

“Fine. Keep your secrets,” she teased as she took his arm, “Lead on Captain Liam! Or should I say King Captain Liam?”

“I can do without the ‘King’ once in a while. I preferred it when I was ‘just Liam’ to you….” He trailed off as his eyes traced across her face.

She looked out over the water, away from him, hoping the darkening of the sky as evening faded into night hid the pink that flamed across her cheeks. “You’ll always be just Liam to me,” she replied quietly.

“I can’t begin to tell you how much it pleases me to hear that.” He told her as they walked down the dock and boarded the ship.

“Shall we?” he gestured to a row of lounge seats attached to the railing.

She took a seat as the yacht glided away from the dock and headed further into the Mediterranean. “It’s a beautiful evening.” She inhaled the night air deeply basking in the peacefulness. There was a beautiful starlit sky, and the weather was a perfect autumn temperature, not too hot, not too cold with just a hint of a breeze drifting off the water.

“I’ve always loved how quiet things are on the water. I could stare at it all night,” Liam said, “But I promised you lessons and the first lesson calls for props!” He pulled a chilled container out from under the deck’s bar and uncorked a bottle of champagne, pouring two glasses as he talked about toasts.

Riley’s eyes scanned the deck of the Italian yacht. Full crew. Chilled champagne, Armand de Brignac, her favorite brand, two Baccarat champagne flutes. There was no way this had been an impromptu rental. She was suddenly uncomfortably aware that they had not been alone together since the Statue of Liberty.

The night she had rejected him.

The night they had the most mind-blowing sex of their relationship inside the statue. She turned her head and rested her chin on the railing, pretending to stare out over the water to cover up her sudden nervousness.

Liam took the seat next to her and handed her a glass of champagne as the boat slowed to a stop and dropped anchor.

Liam talked, Riley listened and then they played out several scenarios involving toasts. Liam proposed hypothetical diplomatic landmines and Riley successfully navigated her way around all of them. She slowly relaxed as Liam’s nothing but professional and polite conversation and the effects of the alcohol soothed her.

“Look at you,” Liam smiled, “I told you, you’re naturally good at this. You barely need me.”

“I’m sure that’s not true,” she returned his smile.

“There is one more thing I can teach you, Riley….” He turned his body to face her, his arm resting across the back of the seating, “body language. You asked about nonverbals. I have a few suggestions.”

She leaned toward him, “I’m all ears!”

“Did you know that roughly eighty percent of communication is nonverbal?”

“What? That much? No!”

“Oh, it is! You can tell a lot about what people don’t want you to know by paying attention to their body language and facial expressions. You can learn to read the signals people give off unintentionally. Take Drake for instance, you can tell when he’s with someone he trusts, he hooks his fingers in his pockets when he feels comfortable.”

“Aww, he’s got a tell!”

“That’s how I first realized he had feelings for you….”

“What?” She was startled at the sudden shift the conversation had taken.

“He was relaxed and comfortable in your presence when it was just the two of you. The times you were together, but apart from the rest of the group, for instance, in a crowded ballroom, but in a back corner out of the way of said crowd. Reversely, he was nervous when the two of you were around other people. Especially me.”

Very rarely was Riley ever struck speechless, but that did it. “I…”

His eyes searched her face, “You didn’t know?”

“Know….what?”

“That he had feelings for you from the beginning.”

“I didn’t know,” she replied quietly, eyes dropping to her lap.

“That’s what I thought,” Liam responded thoughtfully as he twirled the glass in his hand, watching the remaining liquid swirl around the sides, “Nice to know I haven’t lost my touch reading people.”

She reached for his arm, “Liam, I’m sorry-“

“What?” he looked up from his glass, “No, no! I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable! I’m the one that’s sorry! Let’s…Let’s get back to those lessons!”

“Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?”

“I’m sure!” He diffused the situation with humor. Making her laugh had always been easy. They shared the same sense of humor. “Hey, Riley, why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?”

“What?” She laughed, “Why?”

“Because the “P” is silent!”

“Oh, my God!” She covered her mouth as laughter shook her body, “That was bad!”

“So bad it was good?”

“No!”

“But you’re laughing!” Her laughter made him laugh, which made her laugh harder.

“Okay, okay, okay!” She gasped, “I’m done! No more dad jokes, okay?”

“No promises,” he shook his head with a smile, “ready to get back to it?”

She wiped the tears of mirth from the corners of her eyes, “Yeah, I’m ready!”

Twenty minutes later she felt she had a good grasp of the concept. “Wait, wait, wait! Watch this!” She smoothed out her expression letting her face go blank, “What did that say?”

“Very little…which is the whole point. You’re the perfect example of courtly composure.”

“Thank you!” she let her smile rush back.

“Thank you, Riley, for agreeing to help me with all the diplomatic stuff. You’ve fallen into the role so well, it’s like you were born to it, honestly. You’re perfect.”

The unadorned longing was back in his face, and he wasn’t trying to hide it this time.

“Thanks,” Riley turned her head away to watch the play of the boat’s lights along the water as a myriad of emotions collided inside her. The only sound was the peaceful lapping of waves against the boat’s hull as it drifted through the harbor.

They sat in silence, staring out over the water, both lost in their own thoughts for a good while.

“In peaceful moments like this, you can almost forget what the region has been through,” Liam broke the silence and changed the subject, “They’ve had more natural disasters in the past few months than most of Cordonia has faced in years.”

The self-blame in his voice brought her up short, “Hey, don’t go feeling responsible for that. Kings can’t prevent earthquakes or floods, or meteor strikes!”

“If we could, that would be quite a superpower,” he chuckled softly, before heaving a sigh of discontent, “I don’t blame myself for this, Riley…but it’s hard not to feel my reign thus far has been one crisis after another.”

“Liam…”

He tipped his head back and looked up at the stars, “Riley….do you think I’m doing enough for Cordonia?”

“Of course you are! Things might be hard right now, but you’ll learn as you go,” she reached over without thinking and took his hand in hers. “And you’ll have me by your side.”

He turned his head to search her eyes and she suddenly became hyperaware of just how close they were to each other. She stopped breathing for a heartbeat.

He ran a hand gently down the side of her face as she dropped her gaze to her lap. His feather-light touch sent goosebumps chasing down her spine. Using a finger and thumb, he grasped her chin and tipped her head up. His thumb ghosted across her lips,  “I want to kiss you,” he whispered.

He waited for her to object.

She licked her lips.

His mouth met hers, and her lips parted,  his tongue slid softly against hers, moving languidly. One arm wrapped around her waist and tugged her closer, as the other continued to caress her face before moving to tangle in her hair.

She leaned into that kiss, her heart rate speeding up as her hands slid up his chest.

He pulled her closer and kissed her harder.

She pushed him away, gasping for air, “Liam….”

“I know, I’m sorry,” he reached for her, and their hands entwined with each other, his forehead resting on hers, “I got carried away. It won’t happen again. Please accept my apologies. I couldn’t bear to lose your friendship, Riley!”

“Liam…I….” Her whole body was trembling.

The two of them alone in the moonlight brought so many memories rushing back. All of the good ones.

But even the bad ones weren't so bad anymore. They had worked past coronation night, they had worked past her refusal of his proposal. They had salvaged a friendship and forged a working relationship. At least that’s what she had believed until this moment.

She still loved him. The realization hit her like a freight train. Then guilt plowed right into her, and she pulled away from him and jumped to her feet, “I guess we should…get back…”

“Certainly, if that’s what you want,” Liam stood immediately, reaching for her again, “but please tell me that my unwelcome slip-up won’t affect our working together, or our friendship,” he pleaded.

“That’s the problem, Liam….it wasn’t unwelcomed.”

“Oh! I…I’m not sure I understand….”

“Neither do I!” She fought back tears, “but it can’t happen again!”

“Of course not!”

“And I have to tell Drake!”

“Are you sure that’s wise?” Liam asked hesitantly.

“Yes? No…maybe?”

“Whatever you think is best. I’ll follow your lead on this.”

It had been an accident, a momentary slip-up. If it was never repeated, then maybe she didn’t have to tell him, right? No, she had to tell him. “I…I don’t know, I’m not sure….”

“Well, perhaps sleep on it before you make any rash decisions.”

“I don’t know, Liam….I feel like he has a right to know.”

“I realize I might not be the best person to advise you on this, since I’m the one that just kissed you, so I won’t try. But I need you to know…”

“Know what?” She wasn’t sure if it was anxiety or butterflies clawing through her stomach. Maybe a little of both.

“That I’m here, Riley. For whatever you need.”

“Thank you, Liam. I appreciate that.”

The ride to the Ebrim estate was filled with superficial chit-chat, that felt wrong, forced, and awkward. Which wasn’t what she wanted at all. As the car rolled to a stop she turned and took his hand, “Liam, we don’t have to talk about the damn weather and the fluctuating cost of apples! I know what happened tonight threw us both for a loop but can we just…I don’t know…go back to being us?”

The moment it fell from her lips she realized her error, “I don’t mean us, like us…I mean, our friendship, the way it’s been since-“

“It’s okay, Riley,” he squeezed her hand, “I know what you meant, and I’m gratified that you value our friendship.”

“Okay, good,” she sighed with relief. She and Liam would be okay. If they could get past him allowing her to be drug out of the coronation and her refusing his proposal, they could get past this. It was just one little kiss after all.

The bigger issue was how she was going to explain what had happened to her fiancée. Especially when she wasn’t sure she understood it herself.

[alexabeta]

i hardly believe that they didn't get sick of how much they were getting in trouble LMAOO

[alexabeta]

Immortal Desires AO3 Longfic

do i know anything about tumblr? No! Am I in love with some stupid pixel people? Yes!

So, I thought it might be a good idea to drop a link to the fic I am currently working on: snow in crimson, starlight in gold over on AO3

it features poly m!Cas/m!Gabe/enby!MC (Luca, he/they)

Book: Immortal Desires

Characters: Cas x Gabriel x Luca

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Please check tags and A/Ns for TW/CWs

Word Count: longfic, 200k+

I'm adding a lot of backstory to this retelling, and trying to utilise a whole bunch of things I thought the original story could have pushed further. Plus, Cas and Gabe just really needed a chance to fall madly in love, and goddammit I am going to make them admit they both have a raging crush on each other

Hope to see some of you there! 🖤🖤🖤

[alexabeta]

A Moment in Time... (Carolina's POV)

We don't know the ending to Crimes of Passion 2 yet, but I'm feeling angsty...

Book: Crimes of Passion 2 Pairing: M!Trystan Thorne x F!MC (Carolina Rose) Rating: Teen Category: AU / Angst Words: 3,500 Summary: What happens when you find the person you're destined to love forever, but you must do it apart? Trystan & Carolina had a special love from the start, one they hoped would last forever. But when they couldn't find a way that allowed them to bridge their two worlds, they were forced to go their separate ways. Two years have passed, and while she knows Trystan will always hold a piece of her heart, Carolina believes she has found a way to move on. But news from Drakovia brings everything back, and she's forced to live the pain of losing him all over again - and this time - is it for good?

A/N: This will be two parts: this one is from Carolina's point of view, and the second part will be from Trystan's. Participating in @choicesmonthlychallenge - Past WIPS May 2023 - Breakup.

Tommy anxiously wiped the bar down for what felt like the hundredth time. It was always upsetting when business was slow on a Friday night. He was about to grumble about it when he caught a glimpse of Carolina sitting at the other end of the bar. Hunched over, with case folders stacked around her as she furiously scribbled in a weathered notebook. He smiled wistfully as the image transported him to another time. Perhaps things being slow wasn’t so bad, at least for tonight.

She unintentionally created a scene from the past, but Tommy was adding to it with full intent. Filling a tall glass with crushed ice, he mixed one of Carolina’s old favorites, then placed the beverage on a cocktail napkin in front of her. Lost in her work, she didn’t notice the caramel-colored concoction until her uncle practically hovered over her. Then she gazed up with the slightest smile, and Tommy’s heart warmed... he had achieved his goal.   

“What’s this?” she asked.

“A cherry Coke. What else?”

“You haven’t made me a cherry Coke since I was sixteen.”

“Well, you haven’t asked for one,” he grinned. “But looking at you tonight took me back to when you used to do your homework right here. You were every bit as focused on your studies then as you are on your work now.”

“Yeah,” she scoffed, shutting her notebook and resting her elbows upon it. “All that hard work led me to great success. I still live over your bar.”

“Well, New York is ridiculously expensive!” He smiled. “Besides, Carolina, a person is successful if they are doing what they love and their life has meaning. You have both of those things.”  

“I know,” she whispered.

He reached for his niece’s hand and gently squeezed it as they exchanged a knowing look. Looking for a diversion, Carolina lifted the sugary drink to her lips.

“I probably don’t tell you this enough, sobrina, but I’m so proud of you.”

Her smile broadened into the real thing. “Te amo, tio.”

“Yo tambien te amo.”

The bells affixed to the front door jingled, welcoming Luke to the Drunk Tank. He sauntered over to the stool beside his friend.

“I feel like I’m interrupting a moment,” he teased.

“That’s because you are,” Carolina confirmed.

“But don’t worry,” Tommy grinned, filling another glass with ice. “I’ve got plenty for you, too.”

“What’s this?” Luke asked, his face crumpling as the sugary sweet liquid coated his tongue.

“It’s a cherry Coke. Not the canned crap, the old-school fountain-made variety. My uncle makes it better than anyone.”

“What are we, sixteen?” Luke asked.

“No wonder you two are friends!”

Luke watched as Tommy walked away to greet a newly arrived customer, ensuring he and Carolina were alone before he brought up the topic he was afraid to broach.

“So, uh... are you doing all right, Carolina? Seriously?”

“I’m doing the same as I was two hours ago when we left the office,” she deadpanned. “I was fine then, and I’m fine now.”

“OK,” he raised his hands in surrender. “I had to ask because you’re my friend, and...”

“... and Ruby told you to.”

“She may have mentioned it,” he smirked, lifting his ringing phone from his pocket. “Speaking of Ruby...”

“Go, go,” Carolina waved. “Take the call and tell her I said hello.”  

“Are you sure?”

“GO!” she yelled, practically shoving her friend off his stool.

Carolina shook her head as she watched him retreat to a quiet corner. She knew he meant well, so did Ruby, and Mafalda, and Tommy... but none of them understood, fussing over her like this only made things worse.

“I knew I should have gone away this weekend,” she muttered, massaging her sore temples with a wince.

Her headache wasn’t going away anytime soon. But seeing Luke grinning like a fool as he spoke to Ruby helped more than any painkiller ever could. She still couldn’t get over how her crumudgeonly friend’s face still lit up when he spoke to her, even as they were approaching their second anniversary. It would have been her second anniversary, too, if...

No! She couldn’t let her mind go there. Nervously shuffling the papers before her, she returned to jotting her notes. Focus! She was not going to do this. She had come too far and was doing too well; there was no way she was allowing the next few days to undo all the progress she had made. The past was in the past, and she was living in the present... she was exactly where she wanted to be. She had her job, her friends, and her family... she had a wonderful life in New York, and that’s what mattered. This was her life, her real life, and it didn’t include runaway princes... at least, not anymore.

The television had been humming along in the background all night, just as it always was. No one paid it any mind, Carolina least of all. It was a comforting background noise and no more. Until two sentences cut through the ambient chatter like a knife cuts through butter, and once she heard them, the knife landed squarely in her heart.

She knew she should turn away. Walk across the room to get a table with Luke. Retire to her bed for the evening. Anything but remain there and watch that TV. But the trap had been set, and she was a helpless sailor lured by a siren disguised as a reporter bedecked in feather fascinator. Her breath hitched, and the world seemed to stand still.

“The crowds are already lining up for Sunday’s royal wedding! People are willing to sleep in the street for two nights just to catch a glimpse of their crown prince and his beautiful bride....”

Her heart raced; her breath became measured. She had been so careful to avoid the coverage. Even as every reporter in the city sought her comment on the upcoming nuptials. She and Trystan became a media sensation after they resolved the Hand of Mahra murders, and his wedding piqued the public’s interest again.

She became adept at sneaking in and out of side entrances and wearing her hood at an angle not to be recognized. Still, many had captured her, and she wasn’t sure how many more false smiles she could plaster to say she wished him well. In recent days, she resorted to a terse, “No comment.” But that backfired horribly. The next day’s New York Post headline read: “Jilted Detective Bitter Over Ex-Partners Fancy New Fiance.” And here she was, transfixed. He once meant everything to her, and here she was, one of the nameless, faceless millions across the globe tuning in to watch the pageantry unfold.

The reporter described the gilded carriage from the 1700s that would deliver Trystan to the cathedral and the delicate ivory roses the bride had selected for her bouquet. The guest list read like a who’s who of dignitaries from around the world... her name certainly wasn’t on it. Still, the more she watched, the more she was assured that she had done the right thing. None of this appealed to her; it was not a life she could live.

“... while the details of Princess Jia’s gown are as closely guarded as a state secret, we have been told that it will be an eggshell silk creation made by none other than the groom’s sister, fashion designer Marguerite Thorne.”

Carolina visibly lurched forward; the knife that had landed in her heart retreated and plunged into her once more; this time, she was mortally wounded.

“.... that’s all for now, but don’t forget to tune in tomorrow! We won’t be leaving Drakovia until the wedding is over on Sunday! Now, back to you, Phil.”

 She heard a click, the TV went dark, and her uncle’s voice shot out from behind.

“I’m sorry. I should have put on another station.”

“It’s OK,” Carolina shrugged. “It’s unavoidable. At least they didn’t mention his past in New York.”

“Why would they,” Luke sneered as he joined her again. “His family wants to sweep that unfortunate chapter of his life under the rug as if it never happened.”

“Yeah,” Carolina chuckled ruefully. “Unfortunate... still, it’s rather unforgettable for some.”  

“Carolina,” Tommy whispered.

He raised his hand to comfort her, but she successfully dodged his attempt. Pushing back from the bar, she announced she was going to her room.

“Why don’t you let me....” Luke started, but Carolina was quick to cut him off.

“I’m going to my room... alone!”

“All right, but Ruby will be here shortly. Should I send her up when she arrives?”

Carolina felt awful. She didn’t want to snap at her loved ones who were only trying to protect her, but she needed to escape.

“Just... just let me be for a little bit... can we just do that?”

“Of course, Carolina,” Tommy jumped in. “But promise you’ll call if you need us. We’re right here.”

“I promise,” she replied before rushing up the stairs.

She was out of breath before she reached the first landing, but it had nothing to do with her physical health. It was two years ago, she reminded herself, and they didn’t make their decision lightly. It was the best outcome, given the cards they were dealt. Trystan felt an obligation to his people and couldn’t leave; Carolina’s life was in New York, and she couldn’t stay. A nation looked to him as a beacon of hope, but with each day that passed, Carolina felt like she was suffocating.

The night the final word arrived... she could have considered it a gift. After all, it gave her an easy out. Still, the words wounded her soul, and even in that moment, she knew she would never recover.

“I tried,” King Maksim spoke gravely. “The session lasted into the early morning hours, but I was the only one backing the measure to change the Constitution. The future queen must be another royal or, at minimum, a Drakovian aristocrat. There is no way that....”

“That’s bullshit!” Trystan spat, his face twisted with rage, eyes glistening with tears. “You’re the king! You’re the goddamn king! If you have no power to change this, do you have any power at all?”

“Son. You’ll come to see that the monarchy is more than just one man, more than any one person. We exist at the will of the people; we exist because of the traditions that are in place. If those ideals are eradicated, in time, so too will we.”

“Then let it be! If the monarchy is too weak to withstand the pressure of its future king marrying the woman he loves, then it doesn’t deserve to stand.”

“Trystan,” his father sighed sympathetically. “I, of all people, understand.” He turned his attention to Carolina. “It’s nothing against you personally, dear. And you can remain here; no one would bat an eye. I spoke with Eveline, and she’d be delighted to speak with you. You and Trystan can still share a loving, happy....”

“No!” Carolina shut him down. “Absolutely not. No disrespect to you or Eveline, I understand you have your way of life, but I have mine, and I will never allow myself to be relegated to living in the shadows.”

Trystan’s eyes locked on hers, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. “And I love you too much to ever ask you to do so."

Maksim stepped back and cautiously moved toward the door. “Then, it appears you have a decision to make,” he smiled. “I hope you’ll both choose wisely.”

She reached her bedroom, opening the window with hopes that the cool evening air would do something to quell the anxiety rising inside her, but asking the night air to cure a broken heart was a tall order. She collapsed on her bed, clutching her pillow tightly against her chest. Time, she had been told, time would heal all wounds. Perhaps two years was not long enough to recover? But as her eyes screwed shut and a single tear rolled down her cheek, she knew. Two years or two hundred, it wasn’t going to change.  She’d have to make a place for this pain in her life, the same way she made a place for the pain when she lost her father years before. She knew that time would help, but as with any wound that cut this deep, it would still fester each time it was touched.

She could almost feel the gentle mist that fell on the cobblestone terrace that night. Drakvoia always felt so cold and damp, but that night, she felt it in her bones. The butler had just left with her bags, and a town car was waiting to whisk her to the airport. She wondered if Queen Viktoria and the Thorne children, save two, had already popped the bubbly. She was an unwelcomed guest who had long outlived her stay. An impediment to using Trystan for their own whims. They were as delighted to see her go as she would be to be leaving... if only he were by her side.

She probably already saw him for the last time. He had been conspicuously absent all day. Their discussions leading up to their decision were long and painful; riddled with anger at the situation, they managed to turn on each other. It was too cruel, too twisted. Fate couldn’t give you something so beautiful, so precious, only to rip it away... could it? They both knew that answer, as they had endured it before in different ways that were no less painful. 

As they resigned themselves to accepting that they weren’t exempt from having their heart destroyed a second time, the anger turned into sorrow. Their pain to grief. They crumpled to the marble floor together, clinging to each other until they had no more tears to spare. Then Trystan lifted her and carried her to his bed to be together one last time.  They prayed for time to stand still, but to their great dismay, it carried on.  When the morning arrived, Carolina woke up alone to a note she’d keep until her last days. 

My dearest Carolina, I hope you’ll forgive me and not think of me as a coward, but I can’t bear to say goodbye. I want us to live with last night as our final memory of each other.  One final, precious night when I was yours, and you were mine. Fate has been wicked to us, but please know, as I walk through this life, forever alone despite appearances, my heartache will be consoled by one thing and one thing alone, knowing that despite being forced apart, I will always be yours.  I hope, in some small way, you will always be mine. Please remember me, Carolina. For I will never forget you. Yours forever, Trystan.

Tears streamed down her cheeks as the mist turned to rain, but she wiped them off as she returned inside. She was not walking out of this cursed castle, letting them know they had broken her.  She could save that for the plane or when she was home in New York. When she was back in the arms of her family and friends who would help glue her back together, but the Thornes... she wasn’t giving them the satisfaction.

Marguerite was waiting for her as she stepped outside her bedroom door.  They exchanged sad smiles before Marguerite pulled her into a warm embrace. 

“You’re better than them,” she whispered. “I’m so proud of you for staying strong. Don’t let them see how much they’ve hurt you.”

“I won’t,” Carolina’s voice cracked. 

Then, her dear friend accompanied her as she descended the grand staircase one last time.  Carolina flatly ignored the few siblings who stood in dark corners.  They hadn’t come to bid her farewell but to snicker at her and ensure her place in their history had finally come to an end. She didn’t give them the dignity of an acknowledgment as she exited through the castle doors. 

Once outside, Carolina tugged at Marguerite’s wrist, stopping her in her tracks.

“I’ve got it from here, Mags,” she said with a fake smile. “I need to do this alone.”

“If you’re sure,” Marguerite began.  “I’m calling you when I’m back in New York.  You’re not getting rid of me so easily.”

Carolina smiled politely, unsure if she could keep someone who reminded her so much of her lost love in her life.  But this wasn’t the time for another sad goodbye.

“Yes,” she swallowed.  “When you’re in New York...”

Marguerite diverted her eyes, looking all around the now dark entranceway.  “I can’t believe he’s not here.”

“No!” Carolina interrupted.  “No, Mags, it’s too hard for him... and for me... I’ll be... We’ll be fine. Somehow, we’ll be fine.”

The two women embraced for a long while, then Carolina turned and walked to the waiting car.  With each step she took, she felt her composure beginning to crumble.  Blinded by tears, her body began to tremble.  Just a few more steps, she reminded herself, just a few more steps.  Her hand was on the handle of the door when...

“Carolina!” Trystan’s voice echoed as he rushed down the stairs.

“Trystan?”

He took her face in his hands as he approached her, lovingly brushing her wet tendrils away from her face.

“I had to...  I had to see you one last time,” he cried.  “I’m so sorry....”

“No,” Carolina choked, biting her lower lip in a feeble attempt to stop her tears.  “You have nothing to be sorry for, Trystan.  This isn’t... it’s neither of our faults.”

“I love you, Carolina Rose,” he said earnestly. “I swear I have loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you, and I will love you until the end of time.”

“And I love you,” she wept, then they sealed the moment with a kiss.  It wasn’t a kiss that either had experienced before.  It’s one that few would ever know.  It was a kiss that wove a world of yesterdays, today, and tomorrows that would never come into one precious moment.  A kiss that would have to sustain them for the rest of time. 

Mustering up every ounce of strength she had, Carolina pulled back, her hand caressing Trytan’s moonlit face one last time.

“Goodbye, Trystan,” she whispered as she jumped into the car. “Drive!” she ordered. “DRIVE NOW!”

She wasn’t as strong as she appeared and knew she would cave if she remained there even a second more.  She would do something stupid.  Agree to anything if it would keep him in her life, even if she knew it would destroy her in the end.  The driver compliantly followed her orders, and as the car rolled toward the exit gates, Carolina turned back to find Trystan standing in the rain, watching as everything that had given his life meaning headed back to a place that was no longer his home.

In the two years that followed, Trystan reached out to Carolina one time. Unable to imagine a life without her, he hoped they could try to be friends.  She politely declined, telling him that perhaps they could one day, but she had to fall out of love with him first. But as the days marched on, he realized she would never call, for they would never fall out of love with each other.

And now... he was getting married. The palace’s public relations team wove together a fairy tale that most of the world believed.  It was so convincing that even Carolina sometimes wondered if it was true. Perhaps he was able to move on; maybe this was real love.  But it only took one glimpse of Trystan on TV tonight to erase all doubt. 

“My Trystan,” she sobbed into her pillow. 

It was so unfair.  Both forced to serve life sentences for crimes they did not commit.

Hours passed, and Carolina convinced herself that wallowing in self-pity had to end. She wasn’t up to socializing, but she could text her friends and let them know she was doing better. She could order a pizza and some ice cream; maybe she’d be all right with one person joining her. She called Ruby and asked if she would spend the night, and she agreed at once.  She had already returned home but insisted she’d head right back and wouldn’t take no for an answer.

Caroline dragged herself into the bathroom to wash her face and put on her soft, flannel pajamas... the ones she saved for when she needed some extra comfort.  She made herself a cup of camomile tea and sat on her bed to wait for Ruby.  She knew she’d be all right.  She had no idea how or even when, but she knew she’d feel better one day, or at least she truly hoped so.

Several minutes passed when Carolina was startled by a knock on the door.  She jumped up, eager to see her friend. She pulled the door open.

“Wow, that was fast!” she grinned, then the world did what she had wanted it to do two years before.  It stopped on its axis, and all time stood still.  “It’s... it’s you.”

Yeah... I left you hanging there. :) I hope you enjoyed it!

@choicesficwriterscreations @choicesbookclub

Tagging separately.

[alexabeta]

Masterlist

I rarely write but it may be harder to find since I post a lot of things.

*I do not give permission for my work to be copied or reposted*

Queen B - Ina Kingsley x MC

Takin' out the Trash

Synced-Up

Lost Without You

New Beginning

A Sexy Christmas Surprise

First Christmas

Falling in Love with You

You Are The Reason

Meeting the Parents

Meeting the Parents

Meeting the Parents - Part 2

Meeting the Parents - Part 3 (SMUT)

Do I Deserve You? (COMPLETED)

Do I Deserve You?

Do I Deserve You? - Part 2

Do I Deserve You? - Part 3

Do I Deserve You? - Part 4

Do I Deserve You? - Part 5

Do I Deserve You? - Part 6 (SMUT)

I’m not needed, never will I be

I’m not needed, never will I be - Part 1

I'm not needed, never will I be - Part 2

I'm not needed, never will I be - Part 3

Crimes of Passion - F!Trystan Thorne x MC

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