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Transition in Crisis

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Transition in Crisis Podcast

Transitions in Crisis Welcome to Words to Lead By. I’m Linda Parkhouse. Thank you for listening in. If you weren’t listening, I’d just be a voice in the wind. (haha) Let’s talk about transition again as we move toward reopening in many parts of the world. If you didn’t get to listen to episode 10 - The Change Process, you might want to go back to that first. I shared an overview of the book by William Bridges called Managing Transitions. It’s a business-oriented book but the principles apply to all of life. In summary, every change produces loss that needs to be grieved. Then we go into a nowhere between two somewheres, that place where we aren’t sure about what the future looks like and are uncertain of where we fit in whatever future arrives on our shores. Finally, we get a vision for our future and move into the new reality, adjusting to more changes that require grief. It’s a cycle of transition. So, taking these ideas step by step for where we are today, first, change causes loss. All change is a loss of some kind, even if it’s good change. Haven’t we all experienced some loss!? Some of you have lost businesses or significant income. Some of you have watched the company you work for close its doors and you wonder if it will reopen. Some have lost someone they love to this awful illness. Some of you have had to stay away from people you love because of where you work or your risk factors. We’ve all lost any normalcy in shopping, unless of course you always did all your shopping online. Most of our kids have experienced the loss of a rhythm of school and friendships. All of this loss requires that we grieve, that we take the time to feel the feels, yet with the new reality of working from home and schooling your kids, that time hasn’t really been available. Yet we all need to pause and let the feelings come out. It won’t be wise to bury ourselves in a bed and not come out for a week, even if that sounds attractive to some of you. If we suppress our feelings they will come out in anger or bickering or depression or worse. So let’s let ourselves feel. Let’s face the feelings, analyze them and figure out what we can constructively do with them. So that’s step one in transition. Grieve losses. You might want to make a list of losses so you can see what you’ve lost and develop a plan for how to process those emotions. We are all in the nowhere between two somewheres, aren’t we? It’s the Neutral Zone, Bridges talks about. We are in a new and different world and the future isn’t clear for most of us. We can tell the changes we’ve experienced will change the future, but we can’t see with clarity what is around the corner. I don’t think anyone really knows. Lots of people are guessing, but no one really knows the future yet. What we do know is that we will find ourselves in a new reality as it emerges. This phase of transition creates another set of emotions. Uncertainty, lack of control, fear, loss of motivation.. you fill in the blank. Again, it’s imperative to assess our emotions and figure out how to constructively deal with them. In times like this, I am comforted by the fact that God identifies Himself as I am. He says in Matthew 22:32 ‘I am the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob’? He is not the God of the dead but of the living.” In this moment Jesus tells us God is eternal, outside of time limits. The reason this brings me comfort is I need to know someone that loves me who sees out ahead and can help me navigate what’s coming. God sees the future and loves me, so I can rely on Him, give Him my emotions and ask for strength and help in this time of need. There are some incidents from my life that illustrate how this dependence on God can work for you. For most of our marriage, my husband flew search and rescue helicopters for the 210th Rescue Squadron in Alaska. This was a high risk job and we both understood that each time we said, goodbye, could be our last. One morning he left for a normal day of work and a friend came over with her kids for a visit. I had a moment of unusual alertness while we were talking and knew that something had happened to Ron. Very shortly a well-meaning co-worker of his called to ask where he was and mentioned there had been a helicopter crash. Of course that wasn’t approved protocol, but he meant well. I remember walking to the big picture window, gazing out across our city to the mountains beyond and asking God how I should respond. My first emotions and thoughts were dramatic. Should I move closer to family? Where would we hold the funeral? And on and on. After a few minutes of these wandering, worried thoughts, God reminded me I didn’t have to make those decision yet. I needed to let God love me and give me peace. So I did. Many hours later, the official call came and I was told Ron was okay. He’d done an amazing job of crash-landing the helicopter with no injuries to the crew and minimal damage to the helicopter. I was relieved and thankful. I was also glad I hadn’t moved past God’s kind instruction to trust and be at peace. The second instance was when Ron left on a rescue mission, leaving a short note that said, “Leaving on a mission. Don’t know when I’ll be back.” The reason this jumpstarted all my emotions and made me wonder about my future is, he never left notes like this and he left a National Geographic Magazine open to a story on Ellesmere Island in Canada. This was way out of the ordinary. I again had a choice. Would I fear, worry, plan his funeral, plan my move, wonder how to tell my kids, OR would I lean in to God and let Him comfort, give peace and carry me through. I chose the latter. 52 hours later Ron returned from one of the most difficult missions of his life. In those 52 hours, I went on with life. I was even out for dinner with our neighbors when he got back. He joined us at the restaurant and was, needless to say, the story-teller of the evening. The third was when I was surprised with a work change that was not welcome and turned my plans upside down. It happened 18 months ago. I couldn’t see ahead and had many emotions that surprised me. I didn’t travel through that season with the same grace as the first two events I mentioned. I think it’s because this was personal. My value and worth were challenged, my plans were upended, a dream had to die and much more. My husband says this was the worst season of our 35 years of marriage. He braved the storm with me, but the emotions raged, the fears came up frequently, the struggle was real and difficult. Through it all, God reminded me He loves me and He is with me. He was not surprised because He can see the future that I can’t. When I let God comfort me, my emotions stayed in a reasonable range. When I tried to solve my pain by myself, it became difficult for me and for my husband. I’m on the other end of all of it and find myself settling in to a new normal I hadn’t planned. I can tell you with confidence that God is with you, He sees you, He is willing to give you peace and strength. He’s a gentleman and won’t force these things on you. It’s your choice to receive those gifts and use them to your advantage. I hope you’ll do a better job than I did at appropriating God’s peace and strength as you navigate an uncertain future. A final example is the terrorist attack of 9/11. That event altered many things in America. We experience fear, grief, loss, anger, frustration, uncertainty - frankly, all the feels of this present time. That event ushered in changes we consider normal now. I remember when we could wait in the airport at the gate with our departing family and friends. I remember when there were no security checks, we just showed our ticket at the gate and boarded. What is now normal was once prompted by an event that created a new future we’re now living in. We’ve gradually adjusted to what 9/11 caused and we will all adjust and adapt to the changes the pandemic creates. We will all move into a future we may discover one step at a time. We will see hope and some possibilities and we will move into them. Let’s plan now to move into those with kindness to others and to ourselves. Let’s acknowledge now, and when we move into it, that even that future will produce change and we will have new things to grieve, accept and adapt to. We don’t know what those changes are, but I believe we will find ourselves with a different social culture, restaurant culture, travel culture, business culture, and more. We can decide now to transition to that new future, with anger, fear and unrest or with peace, grace and hope. Will you join me in facing the future with peace, grace and hope? If this was helpful to you, I’d love if you would leave a review in iTunes or wherever you access the content and share it with your friends. New episodes will come out twice/month on Thursday afternoon. Bonus content will be mentioned on my social media accounts. Just look for, Linda Parkhouse LLC. Catch you next time on Words to Lead By.

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Communicating Change

All of us communicate change at different times in our life. We communicate change when we have a job change or move to a new living space. When you establish a new value or rule in your home, you communicate change to your kids. When you set a boundary, you communicate change to your friends. Today I am focusing on two important principles that will make the results of your communication more fruitful.

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Communicating Change

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Perspective in Crisis Podcast

First, a big thank you to all of you that are listening and sharing this podcast. I am grateful Recently as I read the Bible, I was in Psalm 16. I saw several things there that bring me comfort and I hope will for you, so I’ll highlight some verses for you. The quotes will be from the Christian Standard Bible Translation. 1 Protect me, God, for I take refuge in you.


2 I said to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
I have nothing good besides you.”

In my spirit, mind, will and emotions I am taking refuge in God when I snuggle up close to His heart and listen for His intent toward me. I’ve been doing this more often and find that when I listen to Him, even in reading this Psalm, He speaks comfort and confidence to me. In the second verse, the song writer says he has nothing good besides God. When we look at the challenges we face and the changes we’ve all experienced, we need something good to focus our attention on. God is good. He is completely good in character and action. When I focus on Him, I see the good around me. I see beauty and the good actions of people, I see His kindness in loving me and making me His own. I see the relationships and life I’ve lived and His fingerprints all over it. I truly have nothing good besides God.

Verses 5 and 6 say: 5 Lord, you are my portion
and my cup of blessing;
you hold my future.


6 The boundary lines have fallen for me
in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.

I very much want to be a person with eternal perspective. I am choosing to see my future in heaven as my inheritance, my portion, as the Psalmist says. Since God holds my future, I don’t need to worry about what day I will join Him in heaven or how. I get to rest in His love and rely on Him to carry me through the circumstances that will take me to heaven. I know, it’s easy to say that until we suffer it, but I have a friend who set an amazing example for me. She chose to trust God with the timing of her death and lived daily with joy to that day. I’m determined to be like her when my time comes.

When I read verses 7 and 8, I thought of the many times I have lain awake at night with concerns about the next day. I was convicted to change that pattern. Listen to God’s words:

7 I will bless the Lord who counsels me—
even at night when my thoughts trouble me.


8 I always let the Lord guide me.
Because he is at my right hand,
I will not be shaken.

The solution to nighttime troubling thoughts is to bless God, to turn my attention to who He is and how He as been with me all day and thank Him, giving Him praise and surrendering my thoughts to Him. I think that blesses God just like when a friend reveals deep parts of themselves to us. I know I feel honored to be trusted with their concerns and their thoughts. God does, too, when I reveal all the hidden parts of my heart to him.

The final portion of the Psalm comforts me as I think of the possibility of dying from Covid19. Now don’t tell me it hasn’t gone through your mind at least once. Here’s what God reminds us through David’s pen in verses 9 through 11: 9 Therefore my heart is glad
and my whole being rejoices;
my body also rests securely.


10 For you will not abandon me to Sheol you will not allow your faithful one to see decay.

11 You reveal the path of life to me;
in your presence is abundant joy;
at your right hand are eternal pleasures. This passage gives us perspective on death. When we choose to rely on Jesus’ death on our behalf to restore full relationship with God our Father, we also get assurance of an eternity with Him. We get to look expectantly to being in the presence of God when we die. In 2 Corinthians 5, we’re told that while we are in our physical body we are not present with God, but when we leave our physical body, we are in the presence of God. I think that’s why the Psalmist said they would not see decay. Their physical body would decay, but their spirit would immediately reside with God. I know, it’s difficult to imagine a place we’d enjoy living besides the earth. It’s a little bit like considering a move to a new city. Even when we study up on it beforehand, we find we couldn’t know exactly what it was like until we experienced the new place. Paul, the new testament apostle, wrestled with whether living on in his body or dying and being with Christ was better. In Philippians 1:20-22 we read: “I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.  If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far;” Wow, I want to be like Paul and my friend who chose an eternal perspective in the face of death. They both chose not to focus on what they had left to do here and chose instead to focus on the joy and beauty ahead of them in heaven. We can do the same. God didn’t hide the fact that life on this earth isn’t all there is. In Hebrews 9:27 and 28 God says, “Just as people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment, so Christ was sacrificed once to take away the sins of many; and he will appear a second time, not to bear sin, but to bring salvation to those who are waiting for him.” We’re told that we will die and that we will be face to face with God. I want that meeting to be one of celebration and joy because I chose God here on earth by accepting His gift of life forever with Him through Jesus and by obeying Him as He gives me instruction and daily assignments. Accepting His gift of life forever is as simple as telling him we’re not able to be perfect and that we need saving. That saving comes through Jesus, who lived and died and rose again to win our peace with God. Will you accept Him today? Will you tell Him you need a savior? If you have given your “yes” to God, are you listening for the next assignment? Are you obeying? I’m not perfect in obedience and I tell him so when I realize it. I ask for forgiveness and resolve to obey quickly and throughly the next time. He is gracious and merciful to me and will be to you. As we live our lives, let’s keep the perspective of heaven and hope in God. Let’s live every day listening for God’s quiet nudges and assignments and carry them out quickly. Let’s pay attention to the goodness of God and let Him be our refuge in this difficult time. Let’s not let the prospect of death frighten us, but hold on to our hope in Christ Jesus for a future in heaven forever. If this podcast was helpful to you, I’d love if you would leave a review in iTunes or wherever you access the content and share it with your friends. New episodes will come out twice/month on Thursday afternoon. Bonus content like today’s episode will be mentioned on my social media accounts. Just look for, Linda Parkhouse LLC. Catch you next time on Words to Lead By.

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Perspective in Crisis

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Ifthere’s one thing we’re learning right now, it’s that the adage is true: thelittle things

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Joy in Crisis Podcast

Podcast content follows:

I don’t have to tell you this is a unique time in history. We are experiencing something as a global community, yet by nation, state and local area that has rarely been known. It’s certainly the first time something like this could be followed globally and that, thanks to technology. Today’s content is taken from the Bible. I think there is comfort and wisdom for us in the pages of the Book God left with us. If you’re listening and don’t believe God is or have been hurt by your experiences with religion, please understand, I get it. I don’t think God ever wanted us to do religion and rules. He invites us into relationship with love and acceptance. Of course sign off now if you’d rather not hear things from the Bible. Whatever God tells us to do is for our good, like when a good parent warns their child not to touch a hot stove or to stay in the yard. God’s commands to us are not intended to be a burden, but bring great joy to our lives. I hope you will understand God’s comfort and joy in the things I share today. In Psalm 34:4-7 in the New Living Translation, it says: I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me.     He freed me from all my fears. Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy;     no shadow of shame will darken their faces. In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened;     he saved me from all my troubles. For the angel of the Lord is a guard;     he surrounds and defends all who fear him. And verse 19 says, "The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time.” Notice that what God offers is protection and defense in the midst of many troubles. I think we want that to be protection from illness, from pain, from discomfort of any kind when God is really promising spiritual protection and defense. If you read reports of Christians who are imprisoned you will see they remain deeply committed to God in the face of horrendous physical and mental circumstances. Read about people who have gone through a major illness or a disaster and some will say they don’t know how they could have come through without God. My husband and I both say we couldn’t have made it this far in life without God’s presence and peace. My husband risked his life doing search and rescue most days of the first 20 years of our marriage. We learned to trust God to be present with each of us spiritually and emotionally no matter what happened in the physical realm. I have been grieving the loss of friend and mentor. She was not that much older than I am and hand an illness she knew would end her days on earth. It was somewhat rare and there were no consistently effective treatments. She put her hope in heaven with God and then gracefully and with dignity faced the great challenges of the last five years of her life by letting God protect and defend her spiritually and emotionally. She lived in the presence of God and I experienced her as having great joy even when the illness made life very hard. God is with us. Are we looking for Him? Are we grateful? Do we have a friendship with Him? Are we listening for His voice? Are we obeying the quiet prompts to call someone, send a meal, send a text. Those acts of kindness are God-inspired. Psalm 16:1 (NIV) says, “You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.” God’s presence is our source of joy, not happiness, joy in all circumstances. Isaiah tells us more about Jesus in chapter 9, verse 6. “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince��of Peace.” When we reside in His presence we experience peace that makes no human sense. The Bible calls that, “the peace that passes understanding…” in Philippians 4:7. What are you doing to today to reside in the peace and presence of God? I find that frequent times reading the Bible and listening for God’s specific encouragements to me in the pages is most helpful. I stay centered on the Person who can bring me through this crisis with peace and joy. It IS well with my soul - my mind, will and emotions, no matter what might happen to my body. I usually end these podcasts with application ideas, so here goes: 1. Read the Bible. It’s easy to have scripture sent to you daily through the YouVersion Bible app. Better yet, sit down at a table in these times, open a paper Bible and a notebook. Choose a chronological or OT/NT reading plan that doesn’t just start at Genesis and plow through all the books in the order they are placed. Read a chapter or more asking God what He wants you to see in the pages. When you notice something, ask him what He wants you to know or do or see there. Write that down. If the verse shouts at you, underline it in the Bible and make a note in the margin as to why it stood out and record the date. You will be glad you did when you read through it again and see where God spoke to you. 2. Choose joy over happiness. To do this, talk with God about everything. Let him have your worries, your joys, your gratefulness and your questions. Wait eagerly for his answers. If this was helpful to you, I’d love if you would leave a review in iTunes and share it with your friends. New episodes will come out twice/month on Thursday afternoon. Follow Linda Parkhouse LLC on Facebook or Instagram for notifications of new content. Catch you next time on Words to Lead By.

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Joy in Crisis

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An Anchor of Hope Podcast

While we’re in this season, we need hope, however. Not the kind we talk of when we say, “I hope you get better,” or “I hope I don’t get sick.”

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An Anchor of Hope

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The Change Process Podcast

I have learned much from a book by William Bridges called Transitions. In this podcast, I’m going to share the key points of his work and how they apply to us.

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The Change Process

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Values Podcast

For organizations and for people, knowing what we value drives our outcomes. For people, what we value becomes what we do. The come out in how we treat ourselves and others; what we buy or don’t buy; what we watch online, what news service we follow. All of these indicate what we value.

Psalm 12 (HCSB)

Some of what our culture values:

Stardom Fame Wealth Comfort Pride Security Image Self

Some of what God values:

Us All He created Relationships Redemption Restoration Reconciliation Peace Love - friendship love, sexual love and selfless love Joy Kindness Repentance Obedience Generosity to the poor and needy Purity Righteousness Justice Mercy, not sacrifice Humility Truth

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Listen

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Values

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Life Goals Podcast

When we know where we want to end up, we make choices through life that move us to that destination. Do you know what you value in life?

My Life Goals:

Psalm 51:10-17 Proverbs 31:10-31 Titus 2:3-5 II Timothy 2:22-26 II Timothy 3:14-15

I Timothy 4:11-16 Psalm 107:20 Jeremiah 1:9 Mark 2:22