akintoabitch

[akintoabitch]

i read this in the Scout tf2 voice

“Let me get this straight about you Earthlings. You cannot drink water from the most abundant source on your planet because it is 3% salt, yet you can easily process various poisons like capsaicin, caffeine, and menthol, with no harm and even some benefits?” “The human body is weird, man.”

[akintoabitch]

TIL that the reason lead levels in children’s blood have dropped 85% in the past thirty years is because of an unknown scientist who fought car companies to end leaded gasoline. He also removed it from paint, suggested its removal from pipes, and campaigned for the removal of lead solder from cans.

via ift.tt

[akintoabitch]

Throckmorton

[akintoabitch]

slowly approaching bear

[akintoabitch]

why does my caladium act like she is starving for light. hang on

[akintoabitch]

I enjoy a joke about fucked up German fairy tales as much as the next nerd, but it's genuinely striking how often the source for the really fucked up stuff turns out to be "yeah, this is only in the Brothers Grimm version and doesn't appear in any extant oral tradition, and we're like 80% sure they added it themselves". To a large extent it's not German fairy tales that are fucked up, it's two specific German dudes.

[akintoabitch]

i have rule i semi-adhere to for media criticism which is to ideologically meet shit where it's at (or where it's presented to me). i like to call it the "i didn't make you market it that way" rule--like, if lancer's union was just presented as a sci-fi setting, that would be fine. i don't expect all sci-fi settings to be communist utopias! but when the creators of lancer use the word utopia like 20 times & bandy around words like 'mutual aid' and 'post-scarcity' and 'anticapitalist' when describing it, then to me that becomes absolutely fair game. similarly if someone says 'stardew valley is fun i like farming :)' then i'm not gonna reply with a long post about how it's ideologically petty-bourgeois--but if they say 'stardew valley is anticapitalist', then they've opened up that can of worms and it's fair for me to point out that the worms exist.

[akintoabitch]

I wish more people used Magic the Gathering's Color Pie instead of D&D's alignment all of the time.

Like, saying a character embodies the selfishness and impulsivenes of Red Black offers more depth than Chaotic Evil

[akintoabitch]

Weird.

Took some measurements, and it looks like my House is one quarter of an inch larger on the inside than on the outside.

I must be doing something wrong. I’ll check it again tomorrow.

[akintoabitch]

Me: Yes sir I understand that the office door cannot be closed when two colleagues of opposite gender are alone together due to sexual misconduct concerns but as an openly bisexual employee I have to ask if leaving two colleagues of the same gender entirely unsupervised isn't a double standard

Me: Like. I feel I should also have my ass covered if a same-gender colleague accuses me of shit, you know

Bossman: Nahhhhhhh it's good

The morally grey cathedral goblin that lives on my shoulder and judges the value of my kneejerk impulses: If you grabbed his ass right now he would learn such an important lesson forever but we don't roll like that bro

Me: (out loud) Okay

[akintoabitch]

my oldest boba fett headcanon, from before i even knew what a headcanon was, is that this man, who regularly whiled away the hours on kamino as a boy reading novels and who has a job that often requires him to do nothing more than stand around looking menacing for hours on end, definitely has an e-reader app installed on his helmet

[akintoabitch]

Just went to the grocery store and it is very close to midnight and so everybody there was pretty scrungy and tired and maybe whacked out, buying shit like cocoa puffs and cake (I was buying candy and ice cream so no judgement) and people were looking at me weird and I only realized until after I got home that I am like fully made up in a nice outfit and was very smiley and giggly bc I was listening to funny podcast and probably appeared to them completely out of touch with the reality of the situation I existed within

[akintoabitch]

Despite every moment of life being indescribably precious and a wondrous mystery, I will spend it caring about dividends and how many rental properties I have.

[akintoabitch]

[akintoabitch]

HELL YES, look how scared they are at the public's reaction, this is amazing

[akintoabitch]

Fool me once, shame on you.

Fool me twice… still shame on you. What? You expecting otherwise? Who raised you? My trusting nature does not absolve you of ethical recompense! Go think about your choices.