ajomi

[ajomi]

Tonight's performance was so good all I can say is THANK YOU! Tomorrow's performance is sold out!

[ajomi]

I Think I'll Finish That Play

Good rehearsal tonight. We are roughly 2 weeks away from opening night. The creative process has a funny way of simultaneously removing me from my personal self while returning me to myself. It's my creative well being replenished. I still haven't done much writing since Granny passed so to be in a show that brings back so many memories of her is almost like she's telling to write. Tonight the way we were seated for an exercise is the original staging for a play I wrote in college. And I had to work to stay present because I could hear and see that play I wrote years ago. I neglected to finish the final draft of the play... I think I'll start working on it. #AmWriting

[ajomi]

I found my muse for my character and penning her a card of gratitude will be done this weekend. The minor details I remember about her from my childhood are helping me shape my character Jeanette. How blessed I am to have this woman in my life. 💖

[ajomi]

Cast of Crowns Announced

I have been cast as Jeannette in Crowns. I haven't performed in 2 years. I knew nothing about the show prior to auditioning except that it's based on a photography book. My grandma Kate purchased the book for my family when I was a kid. It's beautiful!

We had our table read yesterday and I was beaming. The musical takes place in South Carolina. All the characters are from SC and NC. My family roots are deep in those states. I even get to portray a character who went to Bennett College and broke the rules. I didn't go to Bennett because of their rules. Lol! I went down the street to UNC-G. We are singing songs I grew up singing at Mount Gilead Baptist and Sandy Grove AME Zion.

Tonight after rehearsal, I started adding those Virgo touches to my script and music. ♍️ For this show, I'll be singing soprano and alto. I told our vocal director tonight, "Me singing harmony is like a drunk woman walking downtown who keeps losing her shoes. She knows she needs her shoed but can't seem to keep them on and she finds them occasionally then loses them again."

I promised myself that I would return to acting this fall and asked for a show I could connect to. I thought it may have been The Wiz, but I was unable to make that audition and rehearsals. So, I blindly auditioned for Crowns. The ancestors looked out. And I will carry my Granny into every rehearsal and performance. She was a hat lady. We gave away most of her hats after she passed and I am glad about that. Those hats deserve to be seen!

I'll be posting here, IG @angnaomi, and on FB so following along as we put together Crowns.

[ajomi]

Support from your OVERFLOW not your supply.

True story, I have always been the supportive person. I will cheer you on, congratulate you, be there for you, give even when I don't have, share your posts, give you a @kimcoles "woo, woo, woo", and the list continues. HOWEVER, in recent years(especially since I moved to FL) I realized I have been supporting from my supply not overflow. It's a battle because I still care and want to support, but I literally don't have the energy nor tangible things to support anyone. This even includes commenting on your good news. Quite frankly, I don't care. The support overflow doesn't exist. I decided last week that I'm not going to UNCG's homecoming. Sorry, but I evaluated my life, my budget, my feelings and decided it's not worth my support. No love loss. Take this message seriously. Only support from your OVERFLOW!

#inspration #selfcare #igentrepreneurs

#igbusinesswomen #Friendship

#family #support

Regrann from @iyanlavanzant - Happy Friday❣️ Today’s word is Support.👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Here’s to the weekend😘 - #regrann

[ajomi]

My birthday wishlist https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/2TV9S97HEQ4BH

Yup, I made a wishlist of all the things I'd like for my bday. A gal can dream can't she?

9/8

[ajomi]

Falling in Love Again

Years ago, I loved dancing and acting. My dance classes started at 8am and went on through the afternoon. I was on a dance team and had no problems staying up until 2am to finish choreography. I was choreographing dances for pageant contestants and singers. My love for acting was equally strong perhaps stronger. I watched movies not just for the entertainment, but to see how an actor moved, spoke, and reacted.

Then the love began to dissipate. I was still teaching dance and doing a few acting jobs here and there. The difference was that it no longer excited me. To add insult to a literal injury, I found out my back was more jacked up than I thought. Doc didn't say I wouldn't dance again, however, he made it clear I needed to quit my job as a ballroom dance teacher and possibly rethink being a performer.

Like any hard headed individual, I continued to teach dance. I worked at my friend's studio and taught sitting in a chair. Some nights, I'd teach while wearing my TENS Unit and an ice pack. The will to teach and dance wouldn't die, but the love was dying.

I guess what I was feeling was similar to a couple who's been married for 40+ years and doesn't love each other. They're stuck in familiarity.

The years after I stopped working at that dance studio were spent teaching pole fitness. I had a studio in NC then moved to FL and found a studio. I also found a theater. I went back into acting. I started to find the love again. Kinda like seeing an ex and realizing you're still in love.

A few months ago, the love for dancing and acting sat beside me. Yup, just like an ex who knows they still love you and is about to test your boundaries. I signed up for lyra class, vocal lessons, and submitted for a modeling job.

Tonight after class it hit me. That love for acting and dancing has returned. I have missed training! Remember, I would spend hours in the dance studio, hours choreographing, and hours training my body. Some times you gotta go back to your roots. Aside from the dancing and acting, I used to be a gymnast and on the color guard. We trained hard! And that training combined with having a goal was my love.

There have been voids in my life for the past few years and instead of self-medicating and negatively filling the voids, I've been exploring them. Some are out of my control, but the void of acting and dancing is in my full control. I am happy to be falling in love again. I welcome the bruises, sore muscles, blisters, long nights, and the rewards that come after all of it.

[ajomi]

Morning message: That word "harmony" comes up again. Are you balanced? Are you engulfed in something that is draining you or causing you to neglect caring for yourself (emotionally and spiritually)? Do you ignore your intuition? Take a walk. Get on YouTube and find a yoga or Tai Chi class. Wear your favorite color. You have soap and water to wash your feet so get outside and practice grounding. You can wash up afterwards. 😉 Have an enlightened week. Everything isn't falling apart. Everything isn't bad. #MondayMotivation #Meditation #TaiChi #Yoga #Grounding

[ajomi]

[ajomi]

I'm on the Receiving End

I'm a giver. I always have been. I was the kid who would let you choose a toy first or let you cut me in line. And as I grew older, the giving turned into me giving my time, my money, my living space, my love, and my friendship. Yes, I gave to people who gave back and I'm grateful for that. I have some friends who have given me more than I could ever repay. So, I'm not referring to them.

Recently, someone gave to me. They gave their time. Past experiences were creeping up and I had a brief moment of thinking that they gave their time to just say, "Ok. Fine! I did it. It's done. Tootles!" Oh, what a negative mindset to have. Thankfully, that moment was brief and it was replaced by a feeling somewhat unfamiliar to me.

Is this what it feels like to have someone make time for me? Is this what it feels like to know they could've been anywhere with anyone else, but they chose to be with me? Is this what it's like to have someone keep their word? Wow. Pretty dope. This is what I've been giving to others. And it felt so good to be on the receiving end.

It has taken me some time to realize that giving has to come with limits because I didn't think that giving my time was a big deal. I didn't think that inviting people to places with me was a big deal. I didn't think this until I took notice of how infrequently I was invited and how several people seemed to have time for everyone else except for me. Then I realized, my time and being in my presence is a big deal and it's a privilege.

There is nothing wrong with giving to others. But the giving has to come with limits. None of us can continue to give without receiving at some point. We have to be refilled. We have to learn not to give until we have no more. Some people don't deserve it.

[ajomi]

Standing on the walkway. 34th and 11th.

I’ve not written much of anything especially poetry in several months. The desire to write was nonexistent. The inspiration to write had withered away. Yet, I could hear the soft whispers of my ancestors telling me to write. I heard them, but was I listening?

This past week was spent in NYC. It was a trip I hadn’t planned to take. It was a trip that didn’t go as planned once I decided to go. It was a trip that turned out better than I could’ve ever planned.

Walking through Brooklyn with an old friend reminded me of the creative energy I once had and have been craving to find again. Staying with another friend reminded me of what we first bonded over; laughter, poetry, and freedom. A meeting with a new friend opened new career doors for me. Connecting with an old friend in a new way pushed me out of my comfort zone and showed me that it’s okay to be spontaneous.

And somewhere in the streets of Manhattan and Brooklyn, I found my muse again. Perhaps, it’s because the majority of my first book was written in Manhattan. It’s possible that pieces of my spirit were scattered about the city.

[ajomi]

Red Table Talk ep2: Loss

Jada Pinkett-Smith, Gram-Gram, and Willow Smith have a new show. If you haven't watched an episode the link to the Facebook page is at the end of this.

Episode 2 is all about loss. Throughout life we experience loss. As I watched, I started thinking about everything and everyone I've lost over the years. I'm not upset much by lost objects; those can be replaced. But this episode touched my heart. So here are the losses that still are a sore spot for me.

1. When I was in 9th grade, my friend Kanndice died from complications with asthma. I met Kanndice in 6th grade and she introduced me to Kia. Kanndice, Kia, and me were a trio. I didn't get to hang much after school cuz I lived out of district and my mom wasn't going to drive me across town to hangout for an 1hr. Lol! So, we stayed tight during school and the few moments after school before she and Kia had to get on their buses. When she died it hit me hard. She wasn't my first friend to die. In 4th grade, I lost 2 friends (sisters) to drunk drivers. In 5th grade my eldest cousin was murdered. Kanndice's death hit me hard because my sister is an asthmatic. Her death hit me hard because again, she and Kia were my left and right arm. As the years progressed, I experienced moments that triggered that grief of missing Kanndice and the fear of losing someone to asthma. However, it wasn't until last year that I realized I had been doing something that wasn't fair to Kia. I usually give sound advice, but when it came to Kia's relationship with TJ, I gave lackluster advice. Why? I thought about it and admitted to myself and to Kia that if she and TJ break up and stop being friends then I feel like the entire crew of Kanndice, TJ, Kia, and Angela will be shattered. Selfish? Yes, it was. Thankfully, Kia and TJ are still great friends. See how silly fear is? Anyway, our trio may be a duo but we include Kanndice in spirit. Through all of our adventures and disagreements, we include her. Even if I'm upset with Kia, I meditate and talk with Kanndice. And I can hear her voice, "Angellllaaaaaa, stop being a brat." LOL! I miss my friend. And it has taken me all of these years to be at peace. Being at peace is bliss.

2. A few weeks after Kanndice died, my friend Judy died from cancer. I was devastated. Another friend gone. Actually, the year 1999 just sucked. Judy's death was another brick on my chest. We all watched her struggle to beat cancer. She fought hard too. I was depressed after losing Judy. The impact of 2 friends dying back to back was painful. I didn't want to do anything except sleep. Maybe if I slept long enough all the hurt would go away. Judy, like Kanndice, had been my friend since 6th grade. I felt cheated. We aren't supposed to die as children. We were supposed to graduate high school together then go off to college. There was an anger brewing inside me. Why won't they release a cure for cancer? It's a growth a toxic cells. That's science. Fix it! I was also a little angry that my mom didn't take me to visit Judy when she was in the hospital and could have visitors. I guess she was trying to "protect" me. But as the years went on I learned to let go of that anger. Holding on to the memories of climbing trees with Judy was much sweeter.

3. In short, Granny and Pop-Pop were my home. I moved a lot as a kid and I moved a lot in my 20s. Granny and Pop-Pop represented stability. They're both deceased and I'm still wrestling with the feeling of instability. My Pop-Pop died when I was 19 and Granny died in 2013. And that's about all I have to say about that.

4. I lost my dad somewhere in the streets of Mogadishu, Somalia. He flew out from Ft. Bragg, NC and someone else came home. He's my dad, but he's not my dad. When I tell people(including civilians) he was there, their eyes light up with pride and excitement. My dad becomes a "badass Ranger" and an "American hero". And to 1 of my former ESL students, a young man from Mogadishu, my dad is a hero. He doesn't see my dad and his troops as anything else. He said to me, "Tell your dad, I said thank you. We were so scared, but when we heard America was coming we knew were going to be safe." When I told my dad this, he cried. He didn't feel like much of a hero. Their mission in Mogadishu was rough. The war in Mogadishu was horrific. There are no bumper stickers or souvenir patches for veterans of the Battle of Mogadishu. They are forgotten. My dad is haunted by the ghosts of war. PTSD is our 5th family member. What gives me comfort? I cling to the sliver of hope that the dad we sent to Mogadishu has stayed with the young boy, Ali, he befriended and cared for. Perhaps, the impact my dad had on this young orphan gave him the strength and courage to survive the war. I've never stopped praying, hoping, and wishing that Ali got out of Somalia. Maybe he made it Kenya or maybe just maybe he made it all the way here to the USA. And maybe just maybe, that through social media or my travels, I'll bump into him. We have a picture of him and one of him with my dad. I keep hoping that maybe Africa Twitter and Black Twitter will have another massive trending topic and in the midst of the laughter and memes, he will be tweeting and I'll see it. That's the only comfort I have. So yup, somewhere in Mogadishu is my dad and somewhere on this massive planet is my brother Ali.

Watch Red Table Talk on Facebook

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=566078240458322&id=51346591319

[ajomi]

They've inspired me to dance again.

[ajomi]

I'm back... Still Wandering Through Wonderland

Inspired by my friend @anxiousoverreactor and my psychic-medium Ashley Anne, I'm back on Tumblr. What the heck did these 2 do or say that would have me returning to this app? In their own ways, they've made me aware that I've neglected my core which is creativity. I am a writer. I am a dancer. I am an actress. I am singer.

Here I am.

Here I be.

I still have my blog www.angnaomi.ws and will write there too.

Now leave me a comment with some fun, inspiring, informative, enlightening blogs for me to follow.

[ajomi]

My 20s are Over

A few days before my 30 birthday, I was reflecting on my 20s. I thought that by the time I turned 30 I would've had a good job; not a highway of job loss, rejection letters, & unemployment. I thought I would've been married or at least had 1 real relationship. I'm not married and have yet to hear someone say, "This is Angela, my girlfriend." Instead I've heard, "You were a mistake," "It's not even like that between us," and silence among other things I choose not to repeat. I also thought that I would've had a better time in college, perhaps a masters degree, or at least a degree that I'm proud of. Nah, I'm simply proud I went to college and at times it's nice to say, "I have a BA in Sociology" even though most of my knowledge was obtained outside of my college studies.

I wasn't dreading turning 30, I simply felt that I had nothing to show. I felt that I only had pieces of things and a basket full of, "I used to..." Safe to say I was feeling unaccomplished. Then I had to remember the feeling that hovered over me throughout my 20s...the feeling of clawing through debris trying to get to a clearance.

My 20s were what 20s should be...a learning experience. Aside from writing another book, continuing my acting, and continuing my writing of poetry, short stories, & stage and screen plays, I have ZERO desire to repeat anything in my 20s. And yes, this includes my wild party nights. If someone gave me the chance to relive my 20s I would say, "hell naw,". What's done is done and I'm ok with choices that I made. True, I learned a lot about life in general, but more importantly, I learned about myself.

When I awoke on my 30th birthday I had not 1 woe. Every pseudo-lover had been fired (one the day before my birthday). My restlessness & desperateness to find a job had ceased; I joined the Navy reserves(the next 6 months of my life are planned). I had no unfinished business. There were no thoughts of "What if". I entered my 30s in PEACE! I'm looking forward to whatever is to come.

[ajomi]

Do Better

Me: you have a tumblr

Me: yeah you do

Me: idk how to use it

Me: me either