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in order to not succumb to sex negative conservatism you have to accept that people will get off to things that are upsetting to you. and you cannot assume anything about what they have or have not experienced, what they do or do not believe, and how they act based solely on what gets them off. even if it's extremely confusing and disturbing to you. there are people who have only ever had heterosexual vanilla sex in missionary with the lights off, who actively contribute to more real world harm than your average fetish artist. kink is not a reliable source of information on someone's moral standing. it just feels good to think that way.

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If I found out someone I knew who told me they were a transfem was actually afab, it would feel like a breach of trust. There are certain vulnerable things that I would not feel comfortable talking to non transfems about, because people who haven't experienced being barred from femininity don't understand it.

If "transfem" catches on as a label amongst nonbinary afab people, it will make it impossible for us to know who is a safe person to talk about transfem issues with, and who isn't. It will isolate us from having our own community. This was literally the intended function of the term when it was invented by terfs, to make it so transfems can't talk about their experiences. I know the people earnestly identifying as "afab transfem" don't intend for this, but it is what will happen if it catches on.

If you are someone who wants to identify this way anyways, please please please think about why the label calls out to you. If it's because you feel like "not quite a woman," realize what that reveals about how you see us. Transfems don't exist to be your "genderfuck goals," and if you yearn to be seen as an aberration like us, fortunately for you, you'll never know what it's like.

But I can assure you that if you use our language as an aesthetic, a good portion of us will never feel safe around you.

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wow it really is so easy to switch to firefox

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every time i try my luck and check on how twitter's doing i see at least 20 accounts like this and sigh with exasperation and crawl back into my dingy cave on here like a wounded stray dog

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The Marketplace of Identity

Today I'm thinking about how anglocentric queer communities do not view identities and positionalities as descriptive terms outlining their material circumstances and relationship to society, but rather as items on a menu that are meant to be selected from freely, to build one's Personal Brand and aesthetics.

In such an environment, any assertion of the materiality of a construct, the tangible reality it is meant to connote and communicate, registers as a violence, as "gatekeeping", because the identity was never supposed to be about conveying one's particular state of abjection. It is a toy in a basket, and pleas to consider the meaning of phrases are parsed as slapping one's hand away from something shiny.

Welcome to the Desert of the Real, in rainbow.

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god.... sometimes you are a girl who used to be a miserable little boy huh?

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unironically though like the fact that I'm not a man and don't have to be a man and never have to pretend to be a man is just.....so incredibly freeing. it's like the biggest weight off my shoulders i could ever describe. like I tried that and failed and i never ever ever have to try again. it's so nice

it's like giving up and going home. it's like laying down in bed and just sighing. i love not being a man it sucked so hard. i get to be whatever I want and no matter how confusing what i want to be is, i never have to try *that* again

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metal gear solid is a game for girls. boys say they like it but they are faking

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I am so sorry you had a traumatic childhood and it made you stupid on line. I was raised as a lotus flower and I smell like vanilla all the time

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The nurse who prescribes my HRT is great, zero complaints, but he can put the ball a little too in-my-court. In my most recent checkup we were talking about adjusting my dose, and he asked what dosage I wanted, and like, that's not a question I am qualified to answer, my guy.

So I said, "My ideal dose is basically that I'm holding an erlenmeyer flask of pure estrogen and someone offscreen yells, 'Doctor, you can't!' and I say, 'Just watch me!' and then I drink it and contort violently around and then fall out of frame and when I pop back into frame I'm played by Anne Hathaway."

And he didn't give me that dose but he did up it, so, like I said, zero complaints.

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what country has the best milk in the world?

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i like it when boys turn into girls

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that article going around abt firefox's new ad program is annoying bc it's phrased as though "mozilla has finally TURNED on its people and is SELLING YOU OUT for cold hard cash!!" when. that's not what's happening. it is specifically being implemented to discourage tracking behavior, and literally all the data they are giving to advertisers is aggregate and anonymized, which is like, the opposite of what that post wants you to worry about, lol

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this gag from tails gets trolled occupies permanent real estate in my brain because it has no right being this good

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polyam puppygirl subs 🤝 means of production

*being seized and collectively owned*