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My ideal date? You release me into the wild to hunt me for sport on your remote island BUT I’m not very good at hiding so you find me within 20 minutes. You hold the gun to my face but there is something so earnest in my eyes and hands that you cannot carry through. You pick me up and carry me back to your mansion. I am so polite and charming that you nurse me back to health. You grow to love and trust me despite the fact you’re holding me hostage after I fell of a charter vessel bound for Brazil. You buy me new clothes and have them shipped to the island. I kiss you good morning every day. You propose marriage. I accept. We skype in a priest and get married with the butler as our witness. That night I kill you and the butler. I redistribute your wealth. I live in the mansion on the abandoned island for the rest of my days. I study snail ecology. I never remarry. You were the love of my life but you were too dangerous and evil to live. I am buried next to you. The tides eventually wash our bodies away. Into the depths of the ocean, together.

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Hello i'm a normal person here's some stuff i drew to illustrate different traits different "person getting controlled" tropes can have

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Blaperture Mesa is a Portal/Half Life group roleplay. 18+ Discord RP, OC friendly, basic application required.

right now we're specifically looking for a Barney (not Benrey) Calhoun!

DM me for a server invite

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Working on another animatic 😞

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headcanon: in the portal universe, the moon landings were in fact done by portal

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Just saw a goth girl on a dating app. Spider tattoo on her neck, purple hair, black nails, fishnets, etc. Her top spotify songs were all taylor swift. This is a prime example of Batesian mimicry, in this essay, I will

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the past is dead the future died before it could be born and me i feel also not so good

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*going to the AO3 for a work where 70% of the characters are versions of The Same Guy*

Oogh there'd better not be any selfcest or clone fucking in here 😠😠😠

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your honor my client should be at the club

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"Pluto isn't a planet" Fine.

"Dinosaurs had feathers" Fine!

"Neptune isn't a beautiful oceanic blue, it's actually the same washed-out disappointing color as Uranus" I will kill you with my bare hands

Look how they massacred my boy

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Zuko having a connection to the spirit world but instead of it being something deep and profound, it’s just because he spent three years pre-finding the avatar running towards the first weird magical shit he saw.

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the simplicity of lactase supplements is so funny to me. it costs like $4 to circumvent evolutionary biology. want to eat dairy but your body doesn’t produce the enzyme necessary to digest lactose? the devs haven’t patched that yet but you can download a mod

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when I see something dated 2019 I think “oh that’s not too long ago” and then I remember that 2019 was not only five years ago but those five years have somehow contained several lifetimes

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god bless our troops [the ppl at ublock origin who keep updating the filters to keep working on youtube]

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