adventuresofamybee

[adventuresofamybee]

first week, second internship...

Here I am again. The “gringa loca” is back in Chile for the summer (well, winter here)! The words I am about to share are going to be as transparent as possible, because while I am an optimist, I will not deny the reality of life (mainly, culture shock) and possibly deprive someone else the opportunity relate to me. However, I am trying to choose my words very carefully & accurately update what it has been like to be back in Santiago (which has been, in summary, wonderful).

It’s officially been one week, and boy, a whirlwind of a week it has been! It has been overwhelming and nonstop, but full of blessings. My first day back, I got here around 7:30am, took a short time to lay down, then went straight to church. I enjoyed the rest of the day at the mall with my host brother (Seba! I missed this special family) and his cousin, just to find that it was all to stall me from the surprise welcome party that erupted from my living room when I walked through the door! Though, on the walk back Seba said “I bet you’re ready for bed, aren’t you?” (in Spanish, of course) to which I replied “yes, I’m exhausted”, walked into the house and exclaimed “time to sleep!”. I was answered with the screams of “SORPRESA!!!” and lots of balloons thrown my way. I stood there, speechless and my heart full of joy at the sight of some loved ones. So, I didn’t go to sleep, haha. 

The next day I threw myself full-force into my internship. I got my errands done, my phone number changed, and my schedule made. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday I spent all day back with my beloved babes at the House of Hope.

I LOVE THOSE KIDDOS. That seems like it will be my main focus during this internship. They all remembered me from last year, and all the new ones got attached to me after the very first day. I cannot articulate the love that overflows from my heart every time one of them arrives and runs to hug me. I love to listen to them talk about school, I love to read books with them, I love to help them with math and English, I love to have them hanging off my arms & legs, I love them tangling my hair and fighting to hold my hand, I love listening to/watching them sing & dance, I love to see the growth that has happened in a year, and I love getting to know them as little individuals. Somehow, when struggles tug at my heart or tears well in my eyes, every negative feeling flees the second I see their precious faces running toward me. I cannot get enough.

Saturday and Sunday I spent at church. This is the part that gets a LITTLE bittersweet. I am struggling with culture shock a bit more than I did last time, so far. I know that sometimes irrational or exaggerated feelings can come from the ups & downs that culture shock brings. My mind could not be as open as it was the first time I came, because I am already familiar with everything here, so it is affecting me differently than before. Have you ever been in love with a place, moved away, and come back to find everything both strikingly different yet painfully the same? I left with a picture-perfect point of view of this country and the relationships I have made here. Unfortunately, life is not perfect. Some friendships fell through because of distance or because people changed in a way that simply clashed with the person I am becoming. There are people I look at and feel pangs of sorrow to see how they have transformed, and can’t help but remember the way things were the last time I was here. At the same time, there are people I look at and feel disappointed to see that we simply are not growing up at the same rate. This is not solely a cultural issue, of course, as there will always be people around us that do not realize when maturity becomes necessary. (Though Chileans would admit that it does make a difference that they live with their families and depend on their parents a lot longer than the people of the USA do- those are words straight from my host-father’s mouth). Nevertheless, it can be disappointing. My first year at college changed me a lot (but for the better, I’d say!), and I am not the same person I was when I left. I have not lived with my parents since I left for Chile in September 2015, and I understand that I cannot expect the same growth from people who aren’t in the same circumstances. This, of course, goes both ways, so I try my best to see things from everyone else’s point of view.

Anyway, this leaves me with some spread-out friendships, but not exactly the old group that I had anticipated. There is the typical church drama that occurred while I was away that noticeably divided up the youth and broke the unity I had fallen in love with the last time I was here. This, then, leaves me to find “my place” again. It is a little awkward, and at times makes me feel like an outsider. Not only is everyone more segregated, but I have also missed out on a year’s worth of events. BUT, all I have to do is remind myself that God brought me here to serve, and I am not obligated to be involved in what has come of the “youth drama”. To be an outsider does not have to be bad. I will be set apart, I will not choose sides, and I will strive to love everyone. Old friends, broken friendships, restored friendships, and new friends. I remind myself that I need to keep my head above water and not get sucked into any discouraging temporary circumstances. My time back in the USA made me see things through rose-colored glasses, so I am working on accepting the reality of things. This is life! In conclusion, that has been the hardest thing to fight with at the moment. The enemy is thrusting loneliness in my face. I forgot how isolating it can feel to be here alone at times. My personality type feels things pretty intensely, and I am very introspective, which can actually benefit me many times, as I am able to analyze transformations as I go through them. Unfortunately, it can also be a disadvantage, as the spurts of loneliness can hit me pretty hard, but I am thankful for the opportunity to be alone with God in my mind and really study the way certain aspects of the trip affect me emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. So, the good thing is, I am aware of this battle and I am fighting back. Through the doubts and the bumps in the road, I am clinging to the Word. I spit out the lies that are being put in my head, and I restore my soul with God’s truths. I am trying to take advantage of this time to grow even more. My faith has the chance to be cultivated, and I am taking action to make sure that happens. I am constantly striving to redirect my focus to how I can glorify God and serve everyone (especially my House of Hope children), instead of stressing the little things. I also acknowledge that, although I try so hard to gain more and more wisdom from The Lord, I am still 18 with so much to learn. However, it has been helpful to think “How would a mature adult react to this? Would a godly woman let these things impact her?”; that usually switches my instinctive thinking pretty quickly.

All in all, though it has been a busy, overwhelming, exhausting week, it has been AMAZING. I am sure I will continue to adjust more as time goes on! I do believe that a lot of the weird emotions and confusion about my state of being has to do with culture shock. Sure, I have been here before and I know the language, but I have to adapt again and therefore am going to experience the crazy things that the natural process of culture shock triggers. Despite navigating my adjustment, I am loving the time I get to spend with my host family and the House of Hope children. I just prefer to be vulnerably honest and not pretend that everything is perfect, because really it never is… for anyone, anywhere. I am so unexplainably thankful for the opportunity to be back here, and I cannot wait to see what God does! I want to grow in humility, denying myself and living to love others. I close out this first Chile update with a few verses that have been helpful this week! 

“Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy. […] But the Lord has become my fortress, and my God the rock in whom I take refuge.” Psalm 94:17-19; 22

“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” Isaiah 43:1-2

“Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, so that sinners will turn back to you.” Psalm 51:10-13

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8

GOD BLESS❤

[adventuresofamybee]

University Update

September 19th, 2016… My last few months in Chile were the best of all 10. They were absolutely life-changing, and I truly hope to share all the details soon. I know I was never very consistent with my blog... I mean I just posted a draft I've had sitting there since March, but I was always caught up in real life and experiencing every moment to the fullest. I do want to get to the rest of my Chile adventures sometime, but right now I'm compelled to share about my current state. Those closest to me are aware that I've been struggling emotionally & somewhat silently, not just since the start of college (though that has made it worse), but since I came back to the states. I, as a simple human, haven't had the strength to start over for the billionth time and I continue to fight a battle with reverse culture shock (aka repatriation). As much as my heart may want to escape, I know that currently I am called to stay. I heard a sermon on Monday and one thing he said that stood out to me was the fact that we always hear stories about God calling us to go, so we must get up, leave everything, and follow that call. But, sometimes God's "GO" is simply Him calling us to stay. So, here I am. I think we need to talk about suffering more. I think we need to stop portraying our beautiful, perfect, idealized lives on social media while we quietly hurt, resisting the urge to seek fellowship because "everyone else's life seems so perfect, right?" well, wrong, because surely they're saying the same about yours. The raw and the real here is that these transitions are costly and they are lonely, but I'm trying my best to seek Jesus. Coming back from Chile was 100 times worse than it was going there. I didn't cry at all on the flight down there, but stood in a panic attack of tears and the repeated word "no" in the airport before my flight to Indiana, clinging tightly to the new family I had created. My [real] parents had moved from Indy to New Hampshire while I was away, so I sorted through tons of boxes for 3 weeks at my uncle's house in Lawrence, feeling heartbroken and far from everything I loved. Satan viciously attacked me with loneliness my last 72 hours there, and it just was constant tears and confused cries of "why" and "help" out to God. So painful. I then left for New Hampshire, where I was reunited with my parents and my dog (yay!), but I knew no one besides them and was still hurt that I had lost my "home". I desperately longed for college, where surely I would feel comfortable and at home... right? I spent that time in NH volunteering at a Joni and Friend's Retreat for families with disabled children (a goal of mine since the age of 13), visiting my wonderful brother and sister-in-law in NYC, and with my parents on a trip to the white mountains. Here's how crazy my schedule actually looked:

I finally arrived in Arizona, had a great time with my sister and brother-in-law, and started college. I quickly realized that this was not the satisfying "ah" sigh-of-relief moment I had anticipated. This is almost the same battle I've already fought at about 7 schools and one foreign country... all over again. This is the exhaustion of longing to fit in but also just wanting to run away. This is the expectations that were set far too high crashing down on me. This is the reminder that I'm not the complete extrovert I sometimes think I am, especially when no one knows me. This is the cold slap in the face of returning to the states from an affectionate Latin American country. This is me feeling like an outsider and feeling anxious about the future. This is me remembering once again that I cannot depend on my circumstances for joy, but on Jesus and my relationship with Him. But don't "well duh" me, because that is a confusing thing to learn. It doesn't necessarily mean things will get better; it's being joyful even if they don't. It's believing that God is capable of turning things around, but He will do it in His timing. It is not thinking that trusting God will take your suffering away, it means trusting God that this suffering is good for you. It is remembering that we are not alone, and we can cast our cares on Him, for His yoke is easy and His burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).  And it's hard to find time to cultivate that relationship. As a missionary, my life literally revolved around Christ. He was the center of each action, responsibility, and moment. These days, even in a Christian college full of biblical-based classes and chapel services and worship nights, there is now more to my life than there was before. There's homework, trying to form a healthy-happy social life, homework, fitness, homework, adjusting and figuring out my place here, homework, general life responsibilities, aaand... homework. I have to fight for God to remain the center of my life in a world full of teens that are taking advantage of the first taste of freedom they've received. I feel that I must approach this situation with a humble maturity that knows this world is not about who has the best body, who found the coolest party, who has the most boyfriends, and who has the highest GPA. I have to seek a relationship with Him over seeking new friendships. I've always had issues fitting in with the "cool kids", but senior year of high school, God blessed me with the best group of [really, really weird] friends I'd ever had, then provided me with some more amazing friends in Chile, and now I'm here at college where no one knows me... again. I thought that, because of all the moves I've already made, this would be so easy for me. But, I am presented with a painful feeling most would call "homesickness", but that's not what it is. There is not a home I miss, it is simply the feeling of being known, being loved, and being accompanied by people who truly care. The paragraphs above were written September 19th during my first rough month of college. Below is what I have to say now… The semester has come to a close, and God is constantly turning things around. I am doing well right now, even though I still feel anxiety over certain things, I know that God is good. I am happy to say that I finished with A’s in all my courses! I put a lot of effort into my grades, and I’m relieved to see that it all paid off. I am attending a weekly college girls’ bible study, which is leading me to dive into scripture like I never have before. We pull apart every verse to find the hidden meanings, we ask questions, and the time flies as we learn one chapter at a time. My new friends (I did find friends!) and I look forward to it every Tuesday night. I’ve encountered a couple of churches I really enjoy that teach genuine, honest, captivating, and helpful messages. I attend the Gathering (a message and worship night every Tuesday) and Chapel (Monday mornings) that GCU offers on campus. I also have a diverse group of kind students that I have met with several times to study the bible and pray on Sunday nights. I made friends!!! I had been praying so much to find fellowship, and ended up finding seven sweet sisters in Christ. They have helped me to feel encouraged and cared for here, even when things get tough. We share love, prayer, and adventures together. It has helped so much to feel like I am finally a part of an accepting group. These ladies exemplify Christ, each one in their own special way. I am thankful for their kindness. The thought of living with them next year and sharing more adventures together keeps me going when stuff gets tough. I also have a job now… which is exhausting, but it’s awesome to be making money. The commute is a little much- almost 40 minutes- but it’ll get me through this semester/this year at least. I am thankful to have an income, even if it’s far and minimum wage. My job is a blessing. My sister living nearby has also been a huge blessing. She and my brother-in-law have provided me with a safe-haven I can escape to during stressful times, or when I’m just not getting enough alone time living with 5 roommates. Their house has started to feel like a home to me, and I could not be more thankful for that. They have been there to listen and love me since the first week of school, which has truly gotten me through some rough points in the semester.   I found out recently that my second internship in Chile is official! I am so excited to continue my work there and explore more options for my future. I know that God will carry out His will through me/for me. If I am called to be a missionary someday, or a counselor, or both, or none of the above… He will reveal His plans all in due time. I look forward to taking another step down that path. I miss serving in South America. I am so thankful that I have been accepted into the program again. I believe He will provide the funds necessary to take on this challenge. I cannot believe that my first semester of college is over. It began with such loneliness, confusion, and disappointment, but here I am now. I am content, dependent on God, and encouraged by the community/deep bonds I’ve made with new friends. Things are improving day-by-day. That is not to say that all is perfect, but I am thankful for the struggles that bind me to the Savior. Life keeps on changing, and I am grateful for the blessings He has poured upon me as I have clung to Him during this time. Thanks to all who have been there through all my journeys- God bless!

[adventuresofamybee]

December ~ Mid-March

Hey, it’s been a while… well, half a year but who’s counting?

I’d like to share a bit of an update letter I wrote back in March to catch you up on the not-so-latest happenings in my life.

As you already know, for my first few months, I was teaching English alongside a professor at the elementary school affiliated with my church. It brought a smile to my face to see the kids so excited about learning from someone from another country. Kids can teach you a lot in their complete lack of judgment, automatic and unconditional love, and anticipation for education. They always ran to drown me in group hugs or chanted my name while banging on their desks whenever I entered the room. Along with that I spent a few days a week working and assisting in the office of my internship coordinator doing whichever task she had planned for me. When my church had a “Month of Missions”, we created various ways of raising support for people such as orphans of parents who died of Ebola, or families affected by situations in Iraq. Through all of this, I have been very involved in my church here. I cannot explain to you how much joy that place gives me, and I’m blessed to feel so perfectly comfortable in my youth group. I’ve made some friends here with whom I can really be myself and share my passion for Jesus. I like to be a part of all that goes on there; church on Sunday morning, coffee bible discussions every Wednesday evening, and an energetic youth group service every Saturday! I love listening to the wisdom of my fellow youth and learning from all they have to say; I love serving with them and being a part of their church family. Along with attending everything that goes on, I help to organize, clean, set up, and decorate for these things. Recently I’ve begun to lead worship some Saturdays. 

Moving on to December, life got a little more crazy. I had the grand opportunity to visit home for Christmas. There I got to see all my immediate and extended family, which never happens so I’m very thankful for that. I also visited Grand Canyon University and committed to attend there after the adventure that God currently has me on. I was in various states for about a month, and returned to Chile in the beginning of January. I spent half a day here and headed off to Peru the following morning. In Peru, I experienced my relationship with the Lord in a way I never ever had. I mean I’m sitting here writing this letter to you and I’m not exactly sure how to explain it. Peru was yet another week with no wifi, no cellular data either, just pure fellowship. That was absolutely refreshing! No distractions, no stress about emails or responsibilities, none of that aggravation one feels when they’re trying to have a conversation with someone who won’t put their phone down… just pure human interaction and laughter. We worked in the church through painting, renovating, serving, caring for and teaching children, doing more of those “campañas” (with clowns, puppets, choreographed dancing) like I mentioned in the last update. I spent that week with a bunch of women from our “sister church”, and created some awesome relationships with them. I was elated by the end of the week… and in every moment in-between. And if I thought that was cool, I was in for a surprise with God. Without the calling of Instagram notifications, text conversations, or any other means of technology that so often captures us, my mind consisted of just Jesus and I. I made a commitment with Him on the flight up there that prayer would fill up my time... and it did! When I would’ve checked my phone, I prayed. When I worried, I prayed. When my friends had fallen asleep but I couldn’t, I prayed. All throughout the day, I prayed. I had never conversed so much with God in my life, it was so fulfilling. It made me want to throw all technology away, although that’s not very realistic. It has taught me to turn on Airplane Mode, power down the computer, and just sit with The Lord. He’s been teaching me so much lately about how He is the one true satisfaction in this life, and our only constant companion. 

Continuing with January, I returned on a Jesus-high that grew even more a few weeks later. After spending a short week in my Chilean home, I headed off on another mission trip to the Southern town of Melipeuco, this time accompanied by my own church. It was once again wifi-free and I was super excited about it. I knew I was going to be there with all of my close friends and that I would enjoy the face-to-face, distraction-free communication. It was just as marvelous as the trip to Peru, if not better. God continued to speak so much into my heart as each of us had our daily quiet time with Him. It made every little bit of work we did so rewarding because I knew in my soul that I was doing it all for Him. I continued to grow in my commitment to prayer. We followed the trend of painting and cleaning, as well as assisting to a bit of heavy labor for some members of the church (such as old women who couldn’t take care of their farms at this point), and performed some more campañas. These included a musical skit of which I was very honored to be the main character! We also got to do a whole lot of exploration, and I discovered it to be the most beautiful place I’d ever seen. God’s creation can be so inspiring.

I find myself maturing more and venturing farther in my walk with God, and I work every day on putting Him first. I know that I’ll be returning to the United States a different person than I was when I left. I’m learning to let my faith and love for the Lord control my actions. With just over three months left, I begin my final endeavors. I have recently begun volunteering all throughout the week in a place called Casa Esperanza (House of Hope) with children who come from bad situations, such as families that don’t give them the love and care that they need. Here they can come to an affectionate, Christian environment and learn about Jesus, many for the first time, through our words and actions. We help keep them disciplined with their homework and help them to feel motivated in all the work they do. We spend snack time teaching manners and respect. We all play together and learn how to interact in a way that is kind and selfless. But most of all, we just love on them. These children may be considered “hard to love” by some (for the occasional -or often- lack of respect, or for acting out because they don’t know better), but they love so freely and unconditionally. I’ve always got someone attached to my hip, someone’s sticky hand holding mine, someone playing with my hair, someone telling me a random story about their cat, someone sharing their snack or asking me to play with them. It’s my job and responsibility to be a complete reflection of Christ’s love for them, and I’m so overjoyed to do so. I can’t wait to see what God will do in these next few months. 

[adventuresofamybee]

I’m still alive!

Hello world! Remember me? I’m the inconsistent intern who hasn’t made a blog post for like... 2.5 months... oops? As I’m sure you could assume, many things have happened since I last updated my blog. Busy busy bee. I went to Ralco in the South, and that was beautiful. It was really cool to see yet another culture, much different than mine. I watched a lamb get sacrificed and ate the seasoned blood (ñachi) I went to a youth retreat that really sparked my spirit, because I learned who some real friends are and experienced the patience of other people as we spent much time trying to help me understand things. I appreciate that these wonderful people don’t just say “hm, well, she didn’t get it the first time... I don’t know, never mind”, but bring in other people or resources to help me explain or understand. I will forever be grateful for that. I also felt that the retreat was at the perfect time, as it occurred right in my turning point in Spanish, when I was able to understand all the sermons... I even led worship in Spanish (although I was shaking in fear). It was all splendid! Wow two months is a long time... where do I even go from there... When I got back from my week in the South, we had a surprise birthday party for Seba, my host brother. After 4 or 5 surprise parties in my 3 months here, I’m beginning to wonder how all these people are still surprised? I mean, if every birthday party is a surprise, wouldn’t you see it coming by now? But anyway, they’re always a lovely fun time!

Life is fun! It’s filled with teaching English to the children (or to friends with upcoming English tests), designing ways to raise support for other countries during our month of missions, watching soccer on tv or in person, being of service wherever I’m needed, going out to get completos after every church event (completos are like huge hotdogs with all the works), spending time with friends getting lunch at the mall, running lots of errands with my host family, singing constantly in every situation (with the host family or friends), dying playing Just Dance because Chile is very hot and there is no air conditioning, going to a couple graduations (one of a friend, and one of my host brother), and just the adventures of daily life in Maipú. 

We had a week where about 20-25 (more or less) American middle schoolers came down from Washington for a mission trip. That was so incredibly fun for me to be highly involved in! No sleep, just crazy middle schoolers and working until we couldn’t stay awake. We helped out in several schools, and the excitement and energy of the Chileans was so very rewarding. We sanded, painted, cleaned, and painted some more, the usual mission trip things. We put on little “campañas”. These took a lot of practice and instruction, but we had half of the people (the Americans from Washington and Chileans from the youth group) dressed as clowns and the other with puppets, and we ran through the streets yelling and inviting everyone from their houses to come to the park. The park is where we held puppet shows and clown dances all based around a story of God’s glory, aimed to create a longing for Jesus in these neighborhood kid’s hearts. Then there was always a prayer of accepting Him in the end from the kids, and it warmed my heart so much. We played games and silly activities with the children until sundown. 4 of the Americans were staying in my house, and I enjoyed that so much. Middle school is such a special age. They’re so excited about life, fearless to everything, and shameless in all that they are. Gotta love how insane they are. At the end of the week, we had a break day. Those of us Chileans (I was grouped with them half the time because who even am I?) who helped with the campañas and all the Americans went out to an area surrounded by beautiful mountains with a pool and great big land for soccer and games. It was the same location as my the youth retreat, and I loved that as well. It was cool to see everyone connect from the two different countries. I spent that whole week improving my Spanish by constantly having to translate. I’m definitely making my place here, and I’m so happy for that. God is so so so faithful. 

We then had the Gala, which is like a banquet for the youth group. That was such a pretty night! Oh yeah, another thing I’m super duper involved in is cleaning and organizing of the church. Every time there’s a big event or even just Saturday night youth service, I’m there sweeping or putting up decorations. Figured I’d mention that because I’ve lost count of the times I’ve been asked what I do. So that’s something more! We set up for the Gala all day, and then returned in the night for a beautiful night of a great meal and lots of photoshoots. And that was that! It went much faster than I had expected after all that preparing. 

I’m so excited to be making friends in Chile. I got invited to go to a parade with some right before I left, and just these invitations make me so grateful that God has placed me in the perfect place. He is teaching me to trust Him in every circumstance. I praise Him for all the amazing blessings He is presenting me. Even in the beginning of stress and confusion trying to figure out this culture, Jesus walked beside me. And here I am now, soaking up and enjoying every moment of work and fun. To Him be the glory! 

I am now in the USA for a month (I arrived December 16th), and I will be going back on January 13th, then the 15th I fly out to Peru for about 10 days. The rest of January and all of February will be filled with more traveling adventures in Lautaro, Melipeuco, etc. So I shall update then! Endless thanks to those of you supporting me. If you aren’t but are interested in sending support for these crazy expeditions, visit https://www.gofundme.com/iamchile. God Bless. :-)

[adventuresofamybee]

tengo tiempo; necesito paciencia

I. Love. Chile. Many (not all) of the Chileans I’ve said that to think I must be lying just to be nice, or can’t possibly fathom why I would adore it so much. What’s not to like? I think the environment is cute in it’s own way, especially with the beautiful mountains. The people I have spent the most time with already know how much I adore being able to see different angles of the Andes when we walk... well, almost everywhere. I’m a little obsessed.  I love the freedom- being able to walk or ride the metro/bus anywhere.  I love love love the worship. It’s the coolest feeling to worship in a language you’re not completely fluent in. I remember worshiping in German when I visited Tübingen. You still sense the passion and emotion of the song without being completely aware of what you’re saying. It might not feel like words, in which case you are literally making a joyful noise unto The Lord. It also helps my Spanish to read while I sing, because I can translate in my head that way. If you haven’t tried to worship in a foreign language, you should. Although it is more powerful surrounded by other people who are feeling the songs as strong as you, you can certainly find lyric videos on YouTube in whichever language you prefer. (Anyway, aside from that tangent). What I love most of all are the people. Chile has such an affectionate culture, and I’m loving it. It is helpful to have such genuinely kind and loving people around when you are transitioning to a new environment. I think this is the reason I haven’t experienced any “culture shock” yet. I truly adore the culture, and whenever I’m feeling lonely, I know there will be plenty of hugs the second I enter a new room.  Also, people never leave me out. When talking to a few people back home, I’ve used the explanation of being “intentionally included and unintentionally excluded” due to the language barrier. I am invited and communicated with and highly supported and understood here. It feels great to have native speakers rejoicing with me when I actually understand something for once, and also to understand that moving to a new country alone at a young age can be a bit stressful and overwhelming sometimes. I know that in my 3 weeks (can you BELIEVE it has been that long) of being here, I already have a gracious and lovely support system. The accidental exclusion part just comes from not being able to participate in some deep or fast conversations... yet...

So that whole long passage wasn’t even the point of this post, but I’m glad I got to declare my love for this country and it’s people. It is 150% clear this is where I am supposed to be right now. Now that I have filled this post with positivity, I must now tell you the one weakness I’m feeling at the moment. That would have to be a lack of patience... oops. Hey man, I’m too transparent not to state that truth. I’m lacking patience in two areas, which is funny because I’m usually known for being very patient. I’m too go-with-the-flow for this.       One: The language. I want to learn it, and I want to learn it now. I realize that life simply does not work like that, and learning an entire new and infinite set of words takes some time. I just don’t want it to. I’m a talker- an extrovert (clearly), and I’m ready to be a part of the fun. But, I will say I’m improving! I can understand much more now. From what I’ve been told, my ability to respond will come shortly after my comprehension of the language. Either way, I know I have to give it time... which I do indeed have. I just need the patience to let the process of immersion do it’s thing.       Two: The future. Aren’t I just a cliche “just outta high school” adolescent? But seriously, I’ve got no idea what I’m doing. Before I left, I had everything planned out in my head. Everyone said, “Amy, living abroad is going to make you reconsider everything about your life”, but of course I, the wise 17 year old, was sure that I wouldn’t let that happen. Well, here I am now, wondering “which of my two colleges am I going to go to? Or what if God wants me to stay in Chile longer, what if He wants me to come back after college? I would love to. But wait, no, I need to focus on school first! Which school though, I love both? Hey, maybe I should stay another month here? Ugh I never want to leave, what am I going to do?!” Yeah, yeah, yeah, trust me I know that God does not want me to worry. I know the bible tells me to be anxious about nothing, but that is a lot easier said than done. Surrender has always been a very important word to me. It’s a constant reminder that I’ve wanted tattooed on me for a while now, actually. Anyway, if you want to pray for patience, guidance, and understanding for me, that would be awesome. 

At CIY 2015 (Christ In Youth- the greatest retreat and week of every year), we had a night in which we were supposed to let go and listen to the three words God placed in our minds. Mine were “wait, listen, and surrender”. I’ve found that to be very applicable this week. Funny how God works that way. Want to give up trying to listen to a sermon in Spanish? Wait and give it time, listen hard, and surrender my impatience to God. Want to know what the heck you’re doing in life? Wait until He’s ready to reveal it, listen to His plan, and surrender your own wants. It’s quite a useful thing to keep around my brain. 

So, overall, life is great!! Even though I don’t know what’s ahead, I’m trying my best to focus on the now. Thank you so much to all of you who have been praying for me! God Bless :-)

[adventuresofamybee]

9.22.15

[adventuresofamybee]

what a week!

okay, so it’s actually been 10 days, but I love some good alliteration

Wow! Where can I even start? I wanted to make a post earlier so I wouldn’t have this issue of a overwhelming amount of new occurrences, but I was too busy. Circle of life.

These past three days have been Chile’s Independence Day(s), which has been wonderful! Food, dancing, friends, food, family, fondas, food, and more food. They don’t stop feeding me here. I said, “no tengo hambre” (I’m not hungry), but was told “no es importante” (it’s not important). So, eat or get eaten. I’m getting used to having three meals for lunch. I’m very grateful to have the abundance of food that I do have, blessings and blessings! 

My family is the best ever- God was definitely looking out for me with that one. My host parents are so sweet, and I have a great host brother, who is the same age as me. I’m so thankful for that, because I don’t have to go to church events etc. alone. So, I’m kind of making friends? Home is a very happy place! Although I’m still struggling with Spanish, I know laughter speaks no language, and I get to do a lot of that with my family. A lot. Plus my “nephew” is the cutest little monkey, so that’s fun too. I’m just so so so thankful beyond words for the home I’ve been placed in. Having nice parents and a brother to participate in activities or hang out with is more than I could’ve asked for. So far, I never have to be bored!

I’m often asked if I am sad, but no, I’m really happy to be here :-). Before I came, I was almost hoping the 9 months would fly by, but now I’m thinking that’s not even enough time! The only time I really wanted to go home is when I got lost in the middle of a place I didn’t know, with a language I can’t speak, with creepy truck men that whistle at young gringas such as myself (#truth), and no cellular data/gps. I solved my problem though, after an hour of walking around, and taking 2 subways. I then had to go to a church event and try to understand and communicate for the next couple hours. I came home ready to drop dead and never talk to anyone ever again (scary situations followed by stressful ones are never cause for wanting to communicate with anyone), but as usual being with the family cheered me up! I don’t know how they do it. 

Oh yeah, that’s another thing: communication. I’m getting a little better at understanding the very fast Spanish spoken here, and picking up little words here and there, but every single day is exhausting- haha! Apparently that’s normal though, as everyone else who has learned languages by immersion has told me. I guess being too dizzy to translate any more words by the end of the day is how it’s supposed to be. In the words of many other people, even doing nothing and just hanging out is exhausting because I have to pay such close attention to every single word said. Help- this is aging me! (PS. Everyone says Chilean Spanish is the hardest. I agree.)

It’s been a great week overall! I learned the national dance, the cueca, and had to dance in front of many people throughout the past three days (what an introduction to a new youth group). I went to a birthday party, I sang... a lot, I watched quite a few movies, I watched several soccer games, I attended some family events for the holiday, felt the 8.3 earthquake (yay, fun times), and I learned more Spanglish. I’d say it’s been a successful start!

[adventuresofamybee]

and thus ends the most overwhelming day of my life!

here’s a rundown of the last 30 hours... if you’re interested in the nitty gritty details of my settling in 

On Wednesday, my dad and I boarded a flight to Atlanta, and from there we flew to Chile. All together it was about 15 hours of travel (and 4 hours of jolty, groggy plane sleep). We landed in Santiago at about 8:30am Thursday morning (yay)!

We drove from the airport to the house I’m staying in. Two noteworthy factors: - I counted 22 street-dogs in that 15 minute ride - What in the world are the driving laws here?? Do they even have a side of the road? Everyone just drives wherever they want & honk at the people doing the same. Everybody is very unphased so, I guess that’s just a thing. 

My dad and I spent the next 2 hours settling in and freezing to death, but hey, look what my frozen fingers did!

I’m very proud of it all :-) Anyway, my intern coordinator picked us up at 1pm to go for Chinese food with a past intern (of course the first and only food I’ve eaten in Chile is Chinese food). After that point I can’t even remember how the rest of the day went- it was so busy. We went to get my sim card switched so now I have a crazy Chilean phone number. We picked up the intern coordinator’s son and went to a church/school called Oriente. This is where I will be doing a lot of my work, since I’ll be helping teach English twice a week there. It is also where we will go to church, where I will help set up church/youth group events, and attend them myself. The whole city is hyped up for independence day, which takes place the 17th through the 19th, but actually lasts all week. It’s a huge deal here, and the schools let out early all week and all the kids are learning Chilean dances to show off. It’s really exciting that I get to be here for this! That’s actually one of the factors that determined my time of coming here. 

Next, we went to another school farther away. We took another tour and learned all about it, then drove all the way back to this really cute coffee place I enjoyed quite a lot. There was this cake there made out of something they only have in Chile, and the 5 of us shared it. It would be really cool if I could spell Spanish words, or at least remember them. Oh well, you’ll have to take my word for the school and the cake because I don’t remember these names. All in due time, my friends. 

We then stopped by the house of someone who was taking care of the intern coordinator’s other son, and I got to meet a whole bunch of people all at once. They all seemed really sweet, and one of them was a baby so that’s always a plus. From there we headed back to my host house, where I would meet my family and have a [long] bible study. My host parents seem really great! They don’t speak English at all though so... that’s a bit of a barrier that will eventually be broken. I do have a 17 year old “brother” who speaks about as much English as I do Spanish, so conversations with him are very helpful and beneficial on both sides.  The Bible study was about a couple hours, and by the end I was getting a headache from intensely listening to the quick Spanish happening all around me and trying to translate as much as I could. By the end of the day, Spanish didn’t even sound like a real language anymore. It’s like when you repeat a word so much it loses it’s meaning; my brain was done with today... But the people weren’t! We then sat down and had some tea and coffee for maybe another hour? Like I said, my brain was done so for all I know it could’ve been 15 hours. 

Now I am in the comforts of my own new room, and I must say it was a very successful day! I’m so happy to be here and I can’t wait to see what happens next! I’ll end with the verse that stuck out to me the most from tonight’s bible study: San Mateo 28:18-20 : Y Jesús se acercó y les habló diciendo: Toda potestad me es dada en el cielo y en la tierra. Por tanto, id, y haced discípulos a todas las naciones, bautizándolos en el nombre del Padre, y del Hijo, y del Espíritu Santo; enseñándoles que guarden todas las cosas que os he mandado; y he aquí yo estoy con vosotros todos los días, hasta el fin del mundo. Amén. Matthew 28:18-20 : And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” 

Hopefully I will have some actual exciting things for you to read soon... God Bless!