actually-safer-to-kiss

[actually-safer-to-kiss]

Escort

Summary: Spencer was supposed to meet an escort in a bar. When you start flirting with him, he’s completely unaware that you're not the woman he hired. 

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader 

Category: Fluff, Smut

Content Warnings: (18+, minors DNI) misunderstanding, miscommunication, awkwardness, mentions of sex work, heavy make-out, allusions to sex, fade to black sex

Word count: 1.3k

Author’s Note: I wrote this for @imagining-in-the-margins Wrong Recipient challenge (I know I’m super late whoops)

Masterlist

The hotel bar still seemed quiet when you stepped in and took a look around. A lonely feeling had overcome you on this business trip, so you decided you wanted to meet someone new today. 

Lucky for you, the handsome man sitting at the bar looked like he wanted some company, too. With an unusual surge of confidence you approached him, relieved when you found him smiling at you. 

With a saccharine smile painted over your face, you sat down beside him and cooed, “Hi stranger.”

“Hi,” he almost whispered. “I have been expecting you.” 

That certainly was a pick-up line you hadn't heard before. You decided to play along. 

“Yeah? I’m glad we finally met. I was looking forward to spending time with someone so handsome.” 

A wonderful rosy shade spread over his cheeks at your words and it let your heart jump. It was almost unreal how beautiful this man was and he seemed to be completely unaware of that. 

For just a split second your eyes glanced over his hands, expecting to find a wedding ring but there was none. 

“I’m obviously not married,” he said, completely catching you by surprise. You hadn’t expected him to notice. “Or seeing anyone, for that matter,” he added.

“I don't think that was obvious but it’s good to know.”

He raised his eyebrows at your words. “Yeah no, I’m not like that.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I know other men do it but I personally would not talk to uhm… a woman like you if I was in a relationship.”

“A woman like me?” His choice of words was a little odd.

He cleared his voice and shifted in his seat, making his discomfort obvious. “Yeah uhm.. I mean someone…”

“Someone as beautiful and radiant as me?” You laughed as you attempted to save this poor man from embarrassing himself any further. 

“Exactly,” he chuckled as the pink color on his cheeks turned a shade darker. 

Conversation between the two of you flowed easily after that as you began telling him a little bit about yourself and he let you in on some details about his life. 

“So, Spencer, if you live in DC, what brings you all the way here?” 

“My cousin’s wedding tomorrow. That’s actually why I’m here, in this bar I mean. I know it sounds pathetic but when I responded to the invite a few months ago, I checked the box for plus one. I was really optimistic that I would have someone to go to the wedding with by now,” he sighed as his sight dropped down to his glass. 

“That didn’t work out, huh?” 

Spencer shook his head. His whole demeanor gave away a certain feeling of loneliness you were very familiar with. Instinctively you reached for his hand and gently brushed over his skin. 

His eyes found yours once more. Then, after a short moment of silence, he said something you didn’t expect. “I would really like it if you went to the wedding with me.” 

His words were bold, almost contradicting his entire demeanor. You felt surprised yet flattered by his invitation. 

“I love weddings,” you chirped. “And I don’t have any other plans tomorrow.” 

A wonderful smile spread over his face. “Then it’s a date.”

The straightforwardness of his invitation boosted your confidence, too. There was an undeniable connection between you two and the more you talked, the more attracted you became to him. You were sure that this aching inside your chest could only be soothed by his nearness. 

The soft curve of his lips looked so kissable. His smirk gave away that he must have noticed you staring at his mouth. You found his eyes again and almost drowned in the wild honey of his irises. 

“So, profiler,” you playfully purred as you leaned closer. “What does my body language tell you?”

You watched as his Adam’s apple bobbed and his tongue darted out of his mouth to lick his lips. “I’m not entirely sure,” he muttered. 

Taking his hand in yours, you got up from your seat and snickered, “Why don’t you follow me and find out?” 

There was no resistance from him when you led him to the elevator. As soon as the door opened, you stepped in, leaned against a wall and pulled him closer. He stared at you with pupils blown wide and his mouth agape. He stood close enough for you to feel the heat radiating from his body. 

“I’m not a profiler but I’m pretty sure you’d like to kiss me right now,” you cooed as you pushed your chest against his. 

“You’re right,” he breathed as he leaned down. “Can I?”

Right when you wanted to close the gap, the elevator got to your floor and interrupted you with a loud ding. Spencer almost jumped at the sound. You grabbed his hand once more and dragged him all the way down the hall to your room. 

There was no time to be wasted once you stepped inside your hotel room. His lips were on yours in an instant while he pushed you against the closest wall, making you gasp into the kiss. He deepened the kiss as his tongue met yours, melting into you as if you had done that a million times before. When he pressed his body against yours, you noticed his hardness straining against the confines of his pants. 

“Someone’s excited,” you whispered as you let your hand wander down his body with a clear goal in mind. Once you reached his belt, Spencer suddenly stepped back. 

“No, wait,” he mumbled and looked at you almost in shock.

“I’m very sorry if I overstepped,” you sincerely apologized. 

“No, no, that’s not it. We just uh… should talk about this before,” he said. 

Not entirely sure what he meant, you said, “Okay?”

“You uhm… only agreed to go to the wedding with me. So I’m not sure about the uh.. conditions of this… encounter,” Spencer stuttered. 

His words only confused you more. With raised eyebrows you looked at him. “What conditions?”

“Your uhm… rate and what that includes exactly.”

It took you a few seconds to understand what he was talking about. Suddenly the things he said earlier made a lot more sense. 

Your voice was laced with disbelief when you said, “Wait, you think I’m a hooker?”

This situation was so absurd that you weren’t entirely sure if you should laugh or cry about it. 

“I mean… I think the website used the word ‘escort’?”

It was still hard to believe what was happening. You decided to give him the benefit of the doubt instead of getting angry at him. “Spencer, I’m not an escort. How could you think that?” 

Spencer stepped back until his legs hit the bed. He sat down and shook his head, clearly unable to fully grasp what was happening. “Why else would you want to have sex with me?”

His words made you laugh. “Because you’re cute and sweet and very attractive!”

“And apparently very stupid,” he sighed. Regret was written all over his face when he said, “I’m very sorry I offended you. I really thought you were the woman I hired for the wedding tomorrow. We were supposed to meet in the bar to talk about the details.” 

“That wasn’t me,” you clarified.

“Yeah, clearly.” 

“I’ll still go to the wedding with you, if you want,” you said as you sat down beside him. “And you don’t even have to pay me.” 

Your words made him smile. “Yeah?” 

Nodding your head, you climbed into his lap. He seemed a little caught off guard but welcomed you on top of him nonetheless. Your mouth gently brushed over his neck when you breathed, “And guess what?”

“Hm?” You felt his throat rumble under your lips. 

“You don’t have to pay for this either.” 

Thank you for reading! Please like, reblog and leave a comment to show your support and help me stay motivated to write more stories!

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Alex's little smile at this omg

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I’m watching through the show in order for the first time

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I often think abt how sexy it is of him to have his apartment decorated like this…. He’s a single man who lives alone and honestly isn’t home that much but he managed to defeat the bachelor pad queen sized bed with dark blue sheets and one pillow and a flatscreen tv with a singular leather chair in front of it and literally no other furniture or decor and kitchen empty aside from giant container of protein powder stereotype

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Criminal Minds S4E17, Demonology // Mimi Evangeline, from Girlhood is Godhood // Kristin Chang, from Churching // Frank Bidart, from The War of Vaslav Nijinsky // The Dead (1987), dir. John Huston // James Joyce, in a letter to Lady Gregory // James Joyce, from The Dead

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Spencer Reid in every episode of Criminal Minds:

Season 3, Episode 4, ‘Children of the Dark’

Masterlist ✰

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his badge pic is just always gonna make me giggle

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🩵🩵🩵

Spencer Reid Masterlist Series

Serene queen @de4dlyniightshade

Thank you for loving me @ralvezfanatic

Summary: Spencer comes home after a long and stressful case, and doesn't want anything but to be with Reader. Of course, Reader is more than happy to take care of their boyfriend.

Sweet Doctor @luce-reid

Summary: Spencer needs a new suit, and who better to get one for him than his sugar mommy?

Heaven to you @incognit0slut

Lift your eyes @de4dlyniightshade

nicknames @pathologicalreid

Summary: In which you meet the team for the first time, and receive your first nickname

jealous @reiderwriter

all zipped up @ipseitydelrey

Summary: A few months into your and spencer’s relationship, you’re both invited to one of rossi’s dinner parties. the dress you decided to wear was simple, but you needed help getting the zipper all the way up…luckily your boyfriend is there to help.

Getting the hang of this girlfriend thing

Summary: Spencer is in a new relationship and is learning that there’s more to it than just facts.

Late night @talaok

Summary: Derek asks spencer about a late night he had.

need @thankyouivy

fnaf @reiderwriter

dry humping @ddaz3d-and-cc0nfused

the sex tape @yelenassafeplace

respite @reiding-writing

Summary: Derek asks spencer about a late night he had.

sweet girl @luvergirl777

Summary: Spencer is tired, so tired. He knows only one thing could possibly cheer him up. His sweet girl.

lingerie @daydreamingqueen1

my cards @system-to-the-madness

Summary: At the day that Spencer is clean for eleven years, he decides it’s time to show you his cards.

Fuck it I love you @de4dlyniightshade

Following Rules @little-diable

Summary: What if JJ had an older daughter? What if Spencer had known said daughter ever since she had been a teenager? What if Spencer no longer remembers the rules he was supposed to follow when (y/n) finally gives in and pulls Spencer close?

Newbie @glorixuspurpose

Summary: Reader is new to the BAU and discovers that she has similar qualities to another coworker…

Diana nurse @reiderwriter

Pervert @reiderwriter

Pretty isn't pretty @alwaysmoncheri

Summary: you’re starting to feel a little insecure among the other women in the bau, but spencer notices and silences your worries

Do I wanna know @etfrin

Summary: Spencer eats edible and now he's all needy :(( good thing you're here!

Favorite holiday @creativesaturn

Summary: It's almost Spencer's favorite holiday, meaning he's been going on rants every chance he gets. He knows you're interested, but it's not worth getting too confused about.

Replacement @spenceobsessed

Summary: Spencer can't help but despise his "replacement", especially during an undercover mission in a nightclub.

I didn't mean that @creativesaturn

Summary: Spencer tells you what you said during an argument, something you definitely didn't mean.

Cherry trees @pathologicalreid

Summary: You find Spencer reading some... interesting poetry.

You're the prettiest girl in the world to me @etfrin

Summary: You feel insecure about your body and Spencer isn't having it

Drunken rambling @galaxy-siren

Summary: You and the team go out for drinks and you end up drunkenly rambling to Spencer about why you think he's cute.

Burnout @moonstruckme

For the love of lace @reidmotif

Summary: Reader decides she doesn't want to pine for her best friend, Spencer, anymore, but still needs his help deciding what lingerie to wear for her upcoming date.

Confession @gaycentral

Summary: In the heat of the moment, JJ confesses her love for Spencer despite being married. Spencer has a confession of his own.

Pretty in pink @springtyme

Tempting the cowboy @incognit0slut

Summary: The team has been trying to bring Spencer back to the BAU after he hung up his badge to live on his ranch peacefully. It’s a good thing you’ll do whatever it takes to persuade him, even if the rugged cowboy wants to bend you over in the barn.

You're under arrest @virginsexgod69

Summary: Derek hires a stripper for Spencer's birthday party as a joke, but Spencer surprisingly ends up enjoying it.

First blowjob @fliesforeyes

Sneak Peek @actually-safer-to-kiss

Summary: Spencer comes home from a case to find his new fiancée, Reader, in rare form.

Pretty when you sleep @incognit0slut

Summary: As newlyweds, Spencer couldn’t keep his hands off of you. Even when you were asleep.

Good vibrations @bsxcrxts

Apologies @rynwritesreid

Summary: After a breakup with Spencer, you notice how he only flirts with other people when you’re around. However, when you give Spencer a taste of his own medicine, he realizes it will always just be you, and no other woman will ever come close to you. 

Do you get it yet @unequivocallyreid

Summary: Spencer Reid is your professor and you really, really need help. If only he wasn’t so distracting.

Do you got plans tonight @etfrin

Summary: A blind date with Dr. Spencer Reid ends in a surprising manner, including a spilt lip and a thief

Obsessed with kisses @weird-is-life

Sweater Weather @sreidisms

Summary: you wish you could be able to wear Spencer's clothes, but you wear completely different sizes. However, one day he comes home with a surprise.

Girls just wanna have fun @reiderwriter

Summary: Spencer isn't used to clubs, but when duty calls, he's made to feel a little bit more welcome by a girl who seems to know him better than a stranger should.

Behind close doors @de4dlyniightshade

Let me ease your worries @sreidisms

Summary: Spencer finds it hard to understand when you need reassurance. When you tackle the topic, he wants to show you just how much he loves your body.

Stripper reader @luveline

Summary: Spencer’s reluctant to touch you in the week he’s released from prison, and you just wanna know why.

rubber duck @nereidprinc3ss

Summary: In which reader is sick and Spencer takes care of his girl!!

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spencer reid + sleeping

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there is something almost funny about how every time Spencer Reid gets close to actually being happy/confident/better, the writers went wait hold on here’s an idea - what if we give him more trauma

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you can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness, like resignation to the end, always the end — somebody i used to know, gotye.

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Criminal Minds 3.04 'Children of the Dark'