ace-bard

[ace-bard]

theres actually no rules to transitioning and youre allowed to want contradictory things for your transition. it's fine if you only want some of the changes that come with hrt and take preventative measures for the rest (like wanting bottom growth but not body hair or vice versa). you can want to have vagina AND a dick. you can be a woman and want top surgery, or wear a packer. you can be a man and want to have a pussy. you can change your transition goals one or a million times or not have any goals at all and just take things as they come or as they feel right.

there are no rules.

[ace-bard]

something i’ve been thinking about lately time and time again is that a lot of people love the concept and aesthetic of multigender individuals (genderfluid and more) but cannot fathom the real-life multigender experience.

like how can you be so on board with a man who is also a woman and then complain that they describe themselves in - what YOU consider - contradicting ways???? how can you comprehend a person who is sometimes a man, sometimes a woman, sometimes neither, and then police what words fit their lived experience??????? what happened

it can make you confused and it can even make you uncomfortable, but you can’t go knock on that person’s house and be like “uhmm you’re actually doing it wrong” LIKE WHAT. that’s the Actual Life and Existence of someone. what is going on

[ace-bard]

we need to acknowledge more plural people's complicated relationship with gender and attraction

[ace-bard]

Hey as a genderfluid person I think it would be cool if more people would acknowledge that breast forms and gaffs are not exclusive to transfem people and binders and packers are not exclusive to transmasc people

For a lot of genderfluid people, transition goals are a question of what's the least bothersome/most advantageous "default" body to have. That might require medically transitioning but then having cosmetic transition gear to "walk back" sometimes. Maybe a transfem person wants to grow their own breasts with HRT but keep a binder in a drawer for when they aren't feeling busty. Or maybe a transmasc person wants top surgery so they can go out shirtless, but they also want breast forms to fill out dresses

Obviously whether or not this type of transition is attainable is a question of money and privilege, but that doesn't change the fact that these are real, valid, and seldom acknowledged transition goals that a lot of people in my community have

[ace-bard]

“You shouldn’t sexualize/write smut about asexual characters!!!! That’s disrespectful to ace people”

As an ace person, Please For The Love Of God Write More Smut About Ace Characters

I am asexual, specifically a sex-favorable asexual. Because of this, I’ve struggled for a very long time to realize and accept that I am ace. Do you want to know what helped me rationalize and realize this? Smut about Ace characters.

When people yell at others for writing smut about Ace characters to defend Ace people, they are doing the exact opposite. If others weren’t able to write that content, it would have taken me so so long to realize and accept this about myself

[ace-bard]

Begging and pleading for people to realize that some people may not experience sexual attraction but sometimes they may be sexually aroused by certain concepts/actions. And sometimes this then means they want to participate in sex with someone so long as the concepts/actions are present.

They aren't attracted to the person they are having sex with, but they are aroused by whatever is occurring within the sexual scene.

Sex favorable aces don't just have sex because their partner wants to have sex!!! Some sex favorable aces do seek sexual stimulation with other people for their own pleasure!! Big surprise! Shocking development!!

And this is also stigmatized because it's believed you need to find someone attractive to have any drive to have sex with them! Like! No! Some of us are just more interested in their ability to perform what arouses us!

[ace-bard]

Happy Day 4 Of July Or Whatever.

Fuck America!

[ace-bard]

maybe an unpopular opinion but i don’t think we should be caring about detransitoners aww poor baby cis wombyn had one t vile and it ruined your life forever poor you I don’t give two shits trans men literally kill themselves due to not getting access to medical care and all because there’s a small chance a cis woman could access it and regret it a cis woman it’s being made harder and harder because cis people can’t handle the idea that a conventionally attractive white cis woman has top surgery and regrets it

[ace-bard]

It's pride month so I'll allow myself to express one opinion on the internet :

There are no "exact color" of pride flags.

I see more and more sites and posts talking about the exact hex codes for the lesbian flag, or the right purple for the ace one, and how it should be more or less saturated and I just want to say: pride flags were meant to be sewn in your kitchen. To be spraypainted and to be recognised.

There are no "exact colors" of pride flags because you should do them with what you have ! Nobody should care if you use a crimson red instead of a cherry red or whatever ! Be free ! wave your colors ! The colors you have !

[ace-bard]

This started with me wanting to draw my eye.

Freak pride.

[ace-bard]

stop associating testosterone with only men and estrogen with only women. thanks.

[ace-bard]

When you dream of seeing the world in cupio flag colors 💜 Check it out in our shop!

[ace-bard]

We are all gold star asexuals. We're all good at being asexual, including aces who have sex ⭐️

[ace-bard]

we have reached the cisgender man involvement stage of trans discourse. guess what he's fucking saying about transmascs

[ace-bard]

I know that HRT gives you secondary sex characteristics in one direction or another, but we HAVE to stop telling nonbinary people that they “can’t pick and choose.” Of course, you can’t tell your testosterone that you’d rather not grow chest hair, but there are things you can do!

You could go on T so your voice drops and start shaving so you don’t grow a beard. You could start HRT and then stop once you get the permanent changes you like. You can pursue sterilization instead of bottom surgery. You can get top surgery without being on T. You can go on E and work out a bunch to bulk out your muscles. You can pursue laser hair removal or electrolysis to remove unwanted hair, with or without HRT. You could even just start hormones to see if you like it and then stop if it isn’t to your taste.

Obviously, you can’t order secondary sex characteristics a la carte, but we have to stop being so awful to nonbinary people. We should discuss the options we have, not shut down the conversation with “that’s what you get.”

[ace-bard]

[ace-bard]

Listen -- it doesn't happen very often, but a small percentage of people detransition because they're happier as the gender they were assigned at birth.

I'm tired of only hearing about "detransitioners" who are simply trans people who chose their own safety over being themselves. Yes, it's important to talk about these people.

But we're not all like that. Sometimes people try out the idea of being trans and find out that they were wrong. Sometimes people's gender changes over time and they find themselves identifying as the gender they were assigned at birth.

This is all okay and okay to talk about. Talking about the lived experiences of detrans people cannot and does not prove that transphobes are right.