a-simply-simping-simp

[a-simply-simping-simp]

I have a mouse plushie, y'know, the Mouse Wants a Cookie plush, hanging over my bed. I wrapped yarn around its neck, stitched it through its throat, and bound its arms behind his back, then tied him to the top of my window to hang over my bed as a sign of my hatred and wrath. I was 15 when I did this. I had a mental breakdown and thank God I didn't give in to the devil's whispers to kill myself and take my mom with me. I had struggled with suicidal thoughts before, around 7 to 8 years old, and my relationship with, honestly everyone, especially my mom did not help. I felt very misunderstood, weird, wrong, unwanted, and like I was a mistake, something not deserving of the title human because I lacked something, that something in question nobody would tell me about. I prayed only when I was asking to die, I cried at night, had episodes of depression, had spent a year or so forcing myself to never cry and denying myself the right to feel sad, bottled up all my emotions and confusion for my whole life, never had an outlet, and my only coping mechanism was to watch funny videos on youtube.

That was me. Not even a full year ago.

Ever since I accepted Jesus into my life and just surrendered it all to him, I've never had that rage since. I haven't cried at night, or had depressive episodes, or suicidal thoughts, and I would never want any harm to befall my mom. I feel like if I have feelings of sadness or anger, I can take it to God. I no longer feel inhuman and wrong, but valid and loved. My coping mechanism still inckudes funny videos, but also to pray and ask God for help.

God has protected and saved me in an unfathomable way, and I can testify that He works. I'm not a Christian because I was raised in the church. My whole life until a few months ago, I had never touched a bible, never fasted, never truly prayed, and didn't even care to believe, hoping I could be some magical exception. My parents took us to church, but never explained God's goodness, so we were blind to him, seeing him only as a religous figure we follow by tradition. I can testify to you because my faith is my own, and I am this way only because I have seen Him with my own eyes. Literally. I saw Him. I spoke to Him. I touched Him. I heard Him. Even after literally speaking to God, I didn't give myself to him. It took a year or so for that. I felt a pang one day in my soul that if I were to die that day, I would certaintly go to hell. It was like a punch to the stomach of loneliness. I knew what it was and it couldn't be mistaken for anything else. I was far from God and my soul was lonely for its creator. I had already been blessed in all that I did as a child, but afterward, I saw all his miracles in my life and noticed the good hand that feeds me. I am fullfilled and only in Christ do I feel content. I tried everything. I tried friends, family, social media, new looks, experimenting with my sexuality and orientation, self indulgance, and nothing worked. They were all temporary and made me feel worse in the longrun. Only in Jesus have I found peace even in a storm.

So try Him out! He works miracles, I promise.

[a-simply-simping-simp]

SUCK IT

You know, lately, I've been noticing a lot of "bad" things have happened to me.

I've been constantly worried and stressed at school, I'm on a time crunch to figure out what I'm going to do once I graduate, I've just practically broke my neck, I'm in a lot of pain, I'm in an art block, I'm tired, not just physically though that too, I'm tired of everything and I just want the world to end already so I can go home and be with God, I keep having scary nightmares about dying and having my family killed before my eyes at night, I just had a huge fight with my mom AGAIN because of the same issue we have been struggling with since I was born, the one place I actually feel safe enough to be my natural self without people misunderstanding me and seeing me as weird and loud and stupid and crazy and nonsensical and random and particular and annoying has started to be the place where I am told the most that there is a problem with me, the people I trusted enough to be me with keep telling me I'm not trusting them enough because I'm not morphing myself to fit their wants, the only safe place I ever had is becoming my source of stress and anxiety, I have nobody but God to lean on, and self doubt and only God knows the thoughts I've had and only God is the reason I haven't gone off the wire and done irreversable damage to others or mainly myself.

Things keep happening. I keep getting hurt physically and mentaly. Is this is what people call spirtual warfare? Is this my test? Is this my season as Job? Cuz if so I am ACING it! HAHAHA IF SATAN THOUGHT THAT HURT ME, IT BROUGHT ME CLOSER TO THE SPIRIT. THE LORD IS HEALING MY NECK. THE LORD IS HELPING ME GROW THROUGH ME DREAMS. I KNOW HE CAN AND IS WORKING IN EVERYTHING ELSE. I WILL NOT FALTER, I WILL NOT GIVE IN, I WILL NOT FALL. I DON'T NEED A SAFE PLACE. GOD IS MY SAFE PLACE. I DON'T NEED ANYBODY TO LEAN ON. I HAVE GOD TO LEAN ON. I DON'T NEED UNDERSTANDING. I HAVE GOD TO UNDERSTAND ME. I DON'T NEED ANYBODY TO LIKE OR EVEN LOVE ME. I HAVE GOD TO LOVE ME AND NOT ANY LOVE COULD POSSIBLY COMPARE. SUCK OT SATAN. YOU DUMB GOD WANNABE FLIGHTLESS BURNT STUPID WORTHLESS UNLOVED HATED FAILURE AND EXCUSE OF AN ANGEL. FAILING SEEMS TO BE YOUR THING, IF I WERE YOU, WHICH I'M NOT CUZ I'M A LOVED CHILD OF GOD, I'D SAVE MYSELF THE EMBARRASSMENT AND STOP TRYING TO BE A SALTY BRAT ABOUT MY OWN DUMB AND ILLOGICAL CHOICES. LIKE WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND LOOKS AT GOD. THE GOD. AND SAYS YEAH I COULD TAKE HIM? WHAT, DID YOU SEE HIS OVERWHELMING GOODNESS AND THINK: NAH, I'D WIN? YOU WERE IN HIS PRESENCE. HIS RIGHT HAND DUDE. HIS MUSICIAN. AND YOU COULDN'T GAUGE THAT THIS WAS A FIGHT YOU COULDN'T WIN? SUCK IT.

(Found this rant from a while ago in my drafts and forgot to post it lol so imma post it now even though ive been nothing but blessed)

[a-simply-simping-simp]

These two make me wanna cry

Dog Han hehe

[a-simply-simping-simp]

No, I Do Not Hate People and No I am Not Judging Them

God is my Icon. I aspire to be like him in all I can. That means I dislike sin. That means I am a disagreeable person. That means I express my faith even when I know you don't believe the same thing. But that also means that I love sinners. That also means that I must be humble. That also means that I do not judge. That also means that I love my enemies like myself. And I love myself very much. So no, just because I don't agree with you, doesn't mean I hate or even dislike you. Jesus' favorite people are sinners. And it's not like I havs no sins, so I have no room to judge you. When I point out a sin that offends, I'm not doing it to judge you, in fact, 9/10 I am guilty of the same sin at one point or another. I've lied, cheated, lusted, cursed, liked my own gender, ignored God, been quick to anger, been lazy, still am and I need to fix that, been a glutton, still am and need to fix that too but thank The Lord for high metabolism, disobeyed, been disrespectful, etc, just like the rest of you. So I don't look at an athiest, or a witch, or lgbtq+, or a satanist, or literally anyone and hate or judge them. I look at them, say wow, a person just like me who just hasn't found God for themselves yet. I pray one day they give their life to God, oh cool, they have pretty hair.

Just spreading the love man. If you take it as hate, I'm sorry, but I'm not changing anytime soon, soooo want some popcorn?

So with that said, I will repeat my main point cuz nobody read that I'm sure.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

▪︎ I am a christian and child of God

▪︎ That means I do not approve of sinful activities, no matter how harmless they seem

▪︎ I do not discriminate against unbelievers or sinniers

▪︎ I do not judge unbelievers or sinners

▪︎ I love unbelievers and sinners

▪︎ I AM a sinner (Though in God I am redeemed)

▪︎ I do not think of people any differently regardless of their beliefs

▪︎ I do not treat anybody different no matter their orientation, sexuality, hobbies, beliefs, religoun, etc

▪︎ I am not trying to offend people

▪︎ You can do whatever I want and I respect you and your freedom

▪︎ I love you

▪︎ God loves you

[a-simply-simping-simp]

I love how if a christian simply states that LGBTQ is a sin and against God's will, like not shaming or condeming or insulting the person nor the group, but just not agreeing or engaging in their activities, they are immediently the scum of the Earth and become a Judgy jerk. I also love that if literally anybody mocks and belittles the christian faith and scorns it and it's believers while dragging our traditions, holidays and saviour in the dirt while marketing it as some fat old man with a sack of presents, a dumb mutant bunny that lays eggs, or even using the symbol of peace from our God as their sign of pride, most less out of spite than others I will 100% admit, it's just funny and totally acceptable. Oh wait, no. I don't love it. I hate it. I hate it a lot.

I hate how God is a banned topic of discussion in public.

I hate how we are forced to agree to something people know we cannot support or we are labeled as disgusting.

I hate how saying Jesus loves you is an insult to people.

I hate how christian social persecution is so popular yet so unrecognized because it is a big religoun.

I hate how people always feel the need to throw shade and hate to the majority groups simply because of a past and a minority they possess.

I don't just mean christians, I mean all of them.

I hate how everybody dogs on white people because their ancestors used to be racist.

I hate how they are denied the rights to experience other people's cultures simply because of their skin.

I hate how minority groups sometimes abuse and missuse the hard work of their ancestors by using their skin color as a pass to say and do anything.

I hate how every tiny inconvenience ends with a "because I'm XYZ" when it has nothing to do with XYZ.

I hate that I have to tell people of my OWN race that they should stop being jerks to white people and stop picking fights with them if they want to put weave in their hair.

I hate how people think it's ok to say racist things about white people but when a white person says something to you, it's a problem.

I hate how black people can take on "white" characteristics but when a white person does it it's gross.

I hate how people only see two races when there are so many more.

I hate how it's all about black rep, and I love that I do, but when it takes it too far and now anything not containing a black person in it is discriminatory.

I hate how people expect anime and gaming industries from eastern countries to show black people when the people in the region are majority asian.

I hate how people are ok blackwashing characters but not whitewashing them, or even making them lightskinned.

I hate how people blackwash characters that are ALREADY A MINORITY like in anime because the characters are ASIAN.

I hate how people refuse to give representation to races that aren't black, like Eastern asians, southern asians, island pacificers, hespanics, middle eastern, etc.

I hate how when people say we are in a world where we have started accepting our differences, they are lying.

They are lying because accepting and ignoring are two different things.

Accepting them would be talking about things we don't agree on in regular conversations, welcoming friendly debate, not having to be afraid to say something out of fear of not agreeing with a social norm, not facing social persecution.

Today we do not have that.

Today we ignore our differences.

We avoid religous talk, political talk, saying we dislike a movie everyone else loves, saying we like a genre nobody else likes, hobbies other's could find a little odd like, mentioning family situations, mentioning, disagreeing with social norms, and so much more.

I hate it so much.

And I hate that the world doesn't hate it.

[a-simply-simping-simp]

Me waking up this morning litterally bound to my bed b3cause of crippiling neck cramps and stiffness, resulting in ugly sobs, desperate screams, and frantic praying. Literally was so bad I couldn't face forward. Like I physically could not even put my head at a 3/4ths angle before I was subdued by overwhelming pain that even after going back to the position in which I was bound, would contiune to burn as if I had bitten into a battery. But with my neck.

Also me when I sleep:

Funny thing about this is I started praying and thanking God and then I was just like HAHAHAHAHAAHA JOKES ON YOU DEMON, PAIN ONLY BROUGHT ME CLOSER TO THE LORD. NOT TODAY SATAN while ugly sobbing and clutching my neck :>

[a-simply-simping-simp]

God telling you to surrender isn't selfish or prideful, it's selfless and merciful. If you were in a burning 8 story building, the only way out was the window, and a fireman came to save you, would you struggle as they help you get out? Would you squirm around and kick and flail? Personally, I'd surrender myself to them because I know they want me to live and I know they know how to save me. You can't get out on your own and they know that. They went in to save you, not so they could bring out some popcorn and watch you "save" yourself. So let God help you.

[a-simply-simping-simp]

Remember the days you cried alone? Remember all the pain you went through? Remember all the sorrow and anger? Now for a different set of questions. Do you remember the days you laughed happily? Or the days of perfect comfort and a warm bed? Or the joy and love you felt? Why is it that we hold God so responsible for the first set of questions but not for the latter? He provides all that is good, not all that is suffering. Sometimes I'm so focused on being ok that I don't sit to just see the reality of things. The person who gives me grief and suffering and trauma isn't God. He let's it happen so he can do good things, but He did not do it. It was actually an ugly and stupid snake. The same snake that tried to drag me to hell because he's a salty failure and has no life. The same snake who dare try and decieve me and all of my brothers and sisters. The same snake who if you gave me the chance, I would run a pipe down it's skull and out the other end, place it over a fire, and have a cookout. I hate that snake. But don't hate God because the snake is annoying.

[a-simply-simping-simp]

I love how on the night I actually got to talk to, touch, hear, and see God with my own senses, on the night I was fully concious even while dreaming, and on the night I will never forget the feeling of total peace, the only thing I asked him was what should I do. What should I do to be like you. What should I do to follow you. What do you want from me. I love how I had the answers to the universe, to everything in front of my face and all I asked was what should I do to follow Him. And I know why. Because at the end of the day, that is the only question that really matters. My soul knew what needed to be asked and my soul knew only He had the answer. And He did. He said to me: "That is for you to find out." And I am. I'm still figuring it out. And I want others to figure it out with me.

[a-simply-simping-simp]

Don't be a bad fig tree

I needed to hear this and I think a couple of others need to too.

If you have been born again, then act like what you are. Do not pretend to still be among the dead when you have been brought back to life by Christ. Instead, bring the dead among the living. God cursed the fig tree for decieving Him and making Him believe it had fruit when it really didn't. This is signifying to hypocrites who pretend to be holy despite the clear knowledge of bearing no fruit, works, or even faith. But let us be different. We shall not be that fig tree. Nor shall we be a fig tree that HAS fruit but hides it with the appearance of dead branches so that nobody may eat from them. God blessed us with wisdom and speech for this moment. He blessed YOU with wisdom and enlightenment for this moment. So let us BEAR FRUIT and LOOK like we bear fruit, so we may be medians of the all mighty God and bring others to the truth. God bless us all. :)

[a-simply-simping-simp]

That Fangirl Moment Be Like

Does anyone ever get that feeling when you are fangirling so hard you feel like you might actually cough up your heart or whatever organ is starting to burn from all the squeeling you're doing? Or maybe how you squint your eyes so hard in excitment it feels like they might intertwine and shoot your eyeballs to the back of your skull? Or maybe how you wave your hands so visioucly that they might snap?

This lowkey be me whenever I come across my fav characters, my favorite songs, and most importantly, my favorote God.

I need more Jesus stans so we can fangirl together

[a-simply-simping-simp]

Why have I been venting for the past 4 posts?

[a-simply-simping-simp]

Just woke up thinking about this and I need tumblr to be my therapist for a second because I just need to explain my thoughts.

When I first watched BSD (Bungo Stray Dogs), I was ok with Ranpo. I didn't like nor dislike him until I saw his backstory. The story that made most fans cry made me feel so...unsettled. It was like looking in a mirror and it scared me.

I never believed in kinning before him. Relating to an anime character? A BSD one at that? I feel like people are just projecting because it's their favorite character. Those were my thoughts. But then I met Ranpo.

I understood him. I felt what that felt like when I saw his backstory. I felt like part of me was on the screen. For the first time ever, I felt truly related to someone on the screen. It scared me a lot. I kinned a person. RANPO AT THAT.

Actually seeing a part of me I activley try to ignore and deny was a slap to the face for me. It scared me. So for a while, I avoided him. I avoided media or fan content with him in it. Of course, he's in the show, so I can't avoid him forever though. I didn't like him because he scared me.

My entire life I felt like I couldn't connect with people. Not as in I couldn't be friends with anyone, though, that is also true. I didn't understand anyone around me. To me, I was a human. I was sentient, capable of complex thoughts, and I was able to lie and "control the 'people' around me". Looking back, that was a stupid sentiment.

I was human and everyone around me was an npc. That was pretty scary for me. I didn't understand the difference between us as a child. Though I knew that everyone around me was something other than me, I only saw me and them. And if I just said a simple hello, it could become us. I miss that.

When I met Ranpo on screen, it was the moment he said it was like they were all monsters that scared me. There was something he didn't have. Something he didn't understand. That's what he thought, but in reality, it's that he's the one who has something that everyone else doesn't.

For me, it truly was just something I didn't have. And for my whole life, I've been trying to figure it out. What makes them different from me? It didn't make any sense. Everyone understood something that I didn't. Everyone had this "rule" to being a human being that I didn't know about. And that was scary.

Dazai was a bit different for me. I loved him from day -30. Literally. I watched complimations of him being stupid months before I watched the show. Years even. I didn't kin him at all and he was just a silly but complicated guy for me. But then I noticed something after realizing I kinned Ranpo.

My whole life I felt that I was the only human and everyone around me was an npc. But really, it was more that everyone around me was a human and I was...something else. I didn't know what. But it wasn't human. I mean, obviously I am physically and in every scientific way, human, but there's something missing, y'know?

Thinking about it makes me feel so cringe but I really can't explain it any other way.

I don't consider myself a Dazai kinnie because even I can't completely understand the reason he thinks himself not human. I just related a small bit to the sentiment.

So as a um...thing hiding itself as a human, I felt exposed when I was confronted with Ranpo. I eventually came to terms with it and now I like Ranpo. Though he still unsettles me because of the similarity.

So yeah. That was my vent. :)

[a-simply-simping-simp]

I used to pray almost every week to God to kill me in my sleep. I used to get on my hands and knees on the top of my staircase and beg for death. I was maybe around 8 at the time. I wasn't even in middle school. Everyday I'd ake up and feel dissapointed. I'd lay in my bed a bit more cuz I didn't want to get up and llive another day. Can you imagine a child so young begging you to kill them? Can you imagine your child asking that? I used to go my life wanting to die everyday because I was depressed. I was bored. I was scared. I honestly didn't even want to die; I just didn't want to live. But now, I've changed. I don't wish for death but I'm not as scared as I used to be. I mean, I'm not inviting death to knock on my doors, but I have this thirst to be done with this life. I'm bored but only because I know this life pales in comparrison to what comes after. I'm bored because I just want nothing more than to run and hug Jesus physically and directly, in his face, say thank you over and over and over again. I can't imagine what he must've felt as his child, such a young one too, begged him to take her life only because she was too coward to do it herself. Also, I didn't mention that those were the only times I talked to God at all back then. God truly changed me. That isn't all, it truly isn't! I also have had this....situation where everyone around me felt different. At first I felt like the only normal person and everyone else was an NPC, but then I started to realize the only reason they looked like NPCs to me was because they all had some invisible thing or trait in common. I still to this day have no clue what it is, but It was something like this fundemental rule to being human. But I didn't have it. I had the body of a human, the brain of a human, the intelligence of a human...for the most part, but this thing, this thing I lacked. I copied different people constantly to try and figure out what it was but all I gained was an identity crisis. I panicked and cried for a while because I didn't know what was wrong with me. I always knew the people around me were different in a way I couldn't relate, but it all came together, or rather, fell apart when someone very close to me verbally told me something was wrong with me...multiple times. I've been speculated before that I could be on the spectrum. At first I was thought to have ADHD, both kinds. Then I was suspected to have Autism as well as sensory issues. I asked to be tested but still, it isn't really worth the time, money, and effort to others, so I am still unsure. Honestly I hoped this was the case because I'd finally have a reason as to why I'm this way and so that it'd prove nothing was wrong with me. Now, I still struggle a bit with this one simply because I truly want to just know myself. I have someone who understands me. In fact, He made me. And he doesn't make mistakes. I am no misfunction. There is nothing wrong with me. I am fearfully and wonderfully made and only in christ did I figure that out. He is the only confromation I need. God changes people in ways you never would've guessed.

[a-simply-simping-simp]

bout to get myself cancelled...but please read to the end or you won't understand...

Hey, hi! Ok so, this post may be considered offensive to a lot of people, and to be honest, I don't even want to say it at all. I'm scared and worried and I'd rather shut up, sit back, and watch but I can't. I can't because I was called to say this by my God and as much as I want to not say it, I kinda have no right to deny him.

Ok so first of all, I want to make a full disclosure that I mean no ill will at all. I can understand the feelings of those who read this because I too have dabbled in the exact same thing before. Please read the whole thing before you say anything, because I promise it isn't the arguement you think it'll be.

I will not be judging nor slandering any individual nor group and will simply be explaining the mindset of christianity to society. I feel that there is a big misunderstanding in the world right now and at first I was going to simply let it be as it did not involve me. However, God keeps calling me to speak about it and I'd rather be cancelled online than cancelled by a literal divine being.

So, ONCE AGAIN, I AM ONLY EXPLAINING THE REASONINGS, MENTALITY, AND ALSO A MESSAGE TO CHRISTIANS AND NON BELIEVERS. I AM NOT BASHING NOR JUDGING ANYBODY. READ THE FULL THING OR YOU WON'T GET THE FULL PICTURE AND I PROMISE IF YOU DON'T, IT WILL LOOK LIKE A HORRIBLE AND UGLY ONE.

You have been warned.

________________________________

For a long time, those of the LGBTQ minority have been opressed and wrongly treated by not just non believers but by many other religouns as well. In their place, I sincerly apologize. They had and still have no right to opress anyone and judge them in such a horrible way. Everybody is equal. We all have our differences, but with it we are equal. That garbage man? Equal. The leader of a country? Equal. That murderer? Equal. I know, why the murderer right? Well, they were created and molded by the lord himself and in their lungs he breathed the breath of life. They are God's children, therfore, they are equal.

As equals, nobody has the right to claim themselves worthy to judge someone else. For every "wrong" thing with the person you judge, there is one for you as well. Only someone who is perfect can judge and that would be someone who never sins. Someone who doesn't make mistakes. Someone who is just and holy. Someone like God. Too many people have tried to claim this title without even realizing it. Because of that, people of all kinds have been opressed and shunned. For that, I apologize for them.

In those God wannabe groups, christians are very involved. We constantly judge others in the name of our God but we have no right to do so. This has caused many misunderstandings on BOTH sides of this coin. So God has called me, this coward and excuse of a christian to tell you his word. Both have misuderstood, and so both need to hear this. Christians, atheists, and every other religoun. Even if you do not want to turn to God, though it would be awsome if you did, that is not really what this post is about. It is simply and honestly here to clear misunderstanding.

Like I said before, the LGBTQ community have been horribly treated and still are, though in less severity, being treated in such ways by others today. The people who due to religoun are opposed to their ways obviously being the worst of them all. Chritstians vs. LGBTQ...why? Why does it have to be like that? God never intended this bickering and fighting nor did he intend this sitting back on the bleachers and watching people tear eachother apart cuz your too scared to get involved. Intention matters. For someone who is perfect, it matters.

So as christians constantly bash and scorn those who are LGBTQ, those who are LQBTQ mock those who believe in God, and those who are lukewarm and don't know how to respond in the face of either group, I have sat back and watched. It's ugly. It's really really REALLY ugly. I was too scared to say a thing.

I understood what the LGBTQ community felt. I've seen girls before and all I could think was "Wow. I could imagine her as my girlfriend so bad rn." I've prefered woman to men before, though it was subconciously, I knew. If I did not believe in my Lord God, I would be a bisexual, she/they, demisexual queen. But I also had the obligations to uphold my father's wishes as a Christian like everyone else. In the middle, what do I do? Many people have been in this situation. Many haven't. Those who have, are stuck in the middle. Lukewarm. Those who haven't, are cold or hot.

The reasons that christains don't agree with LGBTQ is because the Lord has forbidden it. Many christians and non christians use the excuse, "If all people were gay, there would be no more children in the world!" This is false. You could have a sperm donor. You could donate your body for pregnancy. You could impregnate someone and then raise the child with your significant other. Adopt. It's solvable. However, this creates problems. What if the woman wants to keep her child? What if the husband resents the child for not being his? What if the woman does not properly love the child because she knows it is not hers? Those issues could arise. But that is not the true reason God says no to LGBTQ.

I mean, yes they are reasons, but the real one is because it was not as he intended. It does not hurt anybody, so how can it be wrong? I get it. I've been there.

You have a rock collection. Each one is special and in it's own way, beautiful. You painted each and every one of these rocks. That one is pink. That one is blue. That one is brown. That one is green. They are all perfectly created. They are as they should be. You place them in an order. The pink ones go next to the green ones. The blue ones go with the yellow. It makes a beautiful color order. But then someone takes your collection and repaints the rocks. The blue one turned purple. The pink one turned green. The yellow is orange AND red. It was not as you wanted. It was not as you left it. But that wasn't all. They changed the order too. The one that used to be yellow is with the greens now. The pink with pink and the brown with brown, Colors you never created are with eachother now too. But nobody got hurt. Everyone is ok. The rocks are unharmed. But they are no longer how you intended. You spent 5 hours painting that rock blue. The perfect shade for that specific rock. Now it is pink. But nobody is hurt. You placed that yellow one next to the blue one. But now the beautiful contrast is gone. It is now paired with the green. Nobody is hurt. But it is not how you intended. The person responsible looks at you and says they like it better this way. They say you made a mistake making that one green and that it should be pink instead. That the yellow should be with the pinks and not the blues. Nobody is hurt. But it is no longer how you intended. Nobody is hurt. But it is no longer perfect. Nobody is hurt. But you made a "mistake". Nobody was hurt. But you wasted 5 hours painting. Nobody is hurt. But you, someone who knows color theory and has been making these rocks for years was just told by a person who knows nothing about it and has never made these rocks before that you did it....wrong. But nobody is hurt so it is good.

With this analogy, can you imagine the feelings of the Lord? Imagine making every single rock with care and perfection. Now imagine them changing it. Now imagine them saying you made a mistake. Now imagine them saying those delicate strokes, each brush stroke perfectly angled to make a different and beautiful pattern each time were wrong. Now imagine that with us. God COULD just force us to be the gender he intended. God COULD just force us to love who he wants us to love. God COULD force us to follow him. God COULD force us to do anything. But he doesn't. He gifted us with the gift of choice and free will. We would be robots otherwise. We would feel what he wants us to feel. We would do what he wants us to do. Not because of love but because we have to. And he wants love. Obedience because we love him.

God doesn't want us to change the way he intended it to go. God does not make mistakes. He does not make bad decisions. This is the true reason he does not favor LGBTQ. Not the people, he favors them for they are his children, but the sin. Not only did he not intend it to be this way, he said so in the bible. With that being said, it would also count as dieobedience and purposefully turning from him.

Now before I get cancelled and stoned online, I have yet to finish this loooong text. I have explained to those who do not obey the lord. Now I must adress those who think they do...

Do you know everything? Are you all seeing and all knowing? Do you have everything put together? Are you perfect? Are you God? No. You are his child. Do not discriminate and scorn your siblings but do not sit back and watch them unkowingly walk into a lions den. Warn them of the dangers. Warn them of the reasons. But in a respectful way. Let them know what they could be getting into but in a kind way. Let your reasonings not be of judgment and self proclaiming, but of love and truth. Do not force the Lord upon them. But do not withhold him from them either.

Too many christians I have seen that look in disgust of those who are LQBTQ and too many I have seen that are scared to even call themselves a christian in front of a queer person. We are all sinners. We have no room to judge. We make a bad name for ourselves and wonder why we are judged in return. Why should anyone walk in fear? Gay, trans, queer, crossdressers, allies, asexuals, christians, musslums, jews, atheists, any other religoun or beliefs. We are all children of God even if not all of us realize it. As someone who has been blessed the wisdom of the Lord, christians, stop being rude and discriminatory. Do not make them walk in fear. Atheists, stop mocking those of the christian belief as well as any other belief. LGBTQ, understand that not all christians are out to bite you. Everyone, please just be kind to eachother. Love and respect eachother.

All we can do is agree to disagree. If our warnings fall on deaf ears, do not jam a hearing aid into their face and start screaming at them. It just makes them turn farther from God. If you do not agree with us, please do not mock us like we are idiots. If we do not agree, then we can do nothing. It is not our jobs. It is not your jobs. It is our jobs to love and to follow the way of the lord the way he wants. With humility, humblness, and love. Not hate, judgment, and pride.

So for those who decide to cancel me today, I rest my case. I pleade guilty. I am guilty. I have done what needs to be done and said what needed to be said. I hope both sides understand now and no longer have to be at eachother's doorstep with a buttload of disrespect and hate. Once again, there is no judgment nor ill will in this message. I understand both sides. I have been on both sides. I was lukewarm but with my christian awakening, I have chosen to be hot. You can be hot without burning everything you touch. I will not apologize for my beliefs. I will not pretend to not have one. I'm sorry if this is considered rude to anybody, but not for what I said. So, yeah. Thank you for those who read. Love you ALL. Bye 🫰 :)

[a-simply-simping-simp]

Non Stop Grind

Have been drawing everyday, all day, every night, all night for the past 3 days. Almost done with my refs (not really) and already have my layout for my attacks (not finished cuz it's against the rules). I have been in a major art block for sooo long so this was SO REFRESHING

[a-simply-simping-simp]

Soo I just discovered this thing called artfight. AND I WANT IN SO BAD. But I'm a stupid loser and I'm too wimp to actually try it out cuz communities scare me and I feel like I won't actually be interacting with people and instead sit in my sad corner by my sad self the whole event.

That and when I made myself an account, I misspelled my username without realizing and now I have no idea what my username actually is and therfore can't login to my account nor participate.

And they have a contact to fix this kind of issue but, again, I am a little loser baby who's too embarrassed to ask for help.

I hate myself.

OK FINE AFTER SOME THOUGHT AND REALIZING IT'S IN ONE WEEK I DECIDED TO ASK FOR HELP AND JOIN. I REGRET MY BIRTH

UPDATE, I WAS JUST BEING DUMB. TURNS OUT I NEVER ACTUALLY FINISHED THE REGISTER CUZ I HAD A SPACE IN MY NAME. I JUST SIGNED IN AND I CAN JOIN NOW.

I JUST REALIZED I HAVE 6 DAYS TO CREATE GOOD LOOKING CHARACTER SHEETS FOR ALL MY CHARACTERS AND IM FREAKIN OUT.