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mamk
A stream of thought and inspiration from @MAMK
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Funding Fact
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번쩍밥알
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Sòng Bài Online Fun88
6bram6lopeth6
☿ AnotherDimension ☿
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I love you. i know it doesnt matter anymore. But I still do.
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Its crazy. Things that happen to make someone fall apart. Its weird to see people down, but not knowing where to start. To someone who's down, just falling apart. It's crazy to see someone who has fallen not knowing where to start. Now I'm both struggling from the start. Live life and learn, still falling apart. You get to a point where you shouldn't reach for the park, missed prep, wrong step and you're falling from the stars. Reaching for the moon you'd do anything to make your mark. Step by step you build in the dark. Lonely and quiet for months butcha get a lil spark. Not crawling, finally walking now their aint no more park. All you want but never had. You are still not complacent in your place so your moving like a shark. You get this, you got that, living happy with a stash but now your chilling in park. So content with the mixture, so wrapped up in the tar. Finally in your life you ain't lost or falling apart. It ain't the end. Just the start, got these words from the heart. See I fucked up chilling in park. So happy with my mood I forgot what I had that actually sparked. It takes one thing that could put you back in the dark. Possibly lost falling apart. If I know you, ain't nothing tearing you down or apart. Just a little words from a nigga that was lost from the start. No lessons just embark. If you got what I'm saying, give it a heart.🖤
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I love you. i know it doesnt matter anymore. But I still do.
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“Everything and Everyone that ever was, will inevitably come to an End.”
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I miss you.😥 but I found myself. I hate this, I know it's over, cards delt. But this wasn't just for myself. It wasn't just for my health. It was for us, even when I knew you didn't want us. Absence makes the heart grow fonder but with this I can see that it's not felt. Still the only girl I want, I can't see myself with any other. Still the last girl I touched. I'm not messing with no others. I know none of this matters anymore truly, I seen you on bumble, your still so beautiful. But if I can't get or have you. I'll just keep working on me. Got everything I need besides a passenger queen. I know that can't happen bc you don't want me. It's hard everyday thinking of you, see I get lost in my mind constantly seeing you in my dreams. If you love something let it free. If they love you and come back then it's meant to be. Ig this time it just not ment to be. Ig that just means I keep focusing on me. Lava you B
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It's crazy some days you can be so happy, the next day you can be super sad. But everyday you wake up and try to move on from the past. Even then the sad days are much more sad then the last. Then the happy days deplete down bad. But without the past. Without every single bad day I've had. I wouldnt see happiness or be glad. I'd be upset and mad, angry and sad. I was stuck on my past. Stagnant so bad. Now I look back thinking damn I screwed that. Cant fix it now, just roll it back. Almost to what I need, everythings in a notepad.
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1: I'm done fighting.... Saying "I love you" for a "love you". I'm done hitting you up every morning "I hope you have a good day" or "have a good day at work" or stay safe. Be smart.... Im done rubbing you or caressing you like any of that bullshit matters, bc clearly it doesn't!!!!. I'm done with you thinking your better then me bc I messed up in my past. Like your past is ANY better. I'm done getting hit and ripped apart like my pain is nothing substantial to yours. I'm done trying to prove myself to someone who is deadset on the past. I'm done trying, when I get nothing back. Your time is nice and I appreciate it alot. But when I was by myself. I mean truly by myself. I was untouchable no sex no talking to anyone. Just me in my head. Untouchable. Until I folded bc you called me. And I felt your touch. And Seen your smile. And I got to hold you..... I folded.... With that being said I was ok before you called me. I'll be okay again and after..... You know your worth. Now after all I've caused and all I've been through bc of it as I was trying to fix it.... So do I aswell. Take it however you may. I'm done
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2: I keep writing but it'll never show. I keep hurting but you'll never know. I keep it to myself. I'm too stubborn to let go. I'm dieing inside but I can not fold. Wake up, workout, work... Let's go. Get home, eat, sleep my nights are too cold. She says what's up(wink) I'm not sold. Another say let's link. Don't want to Im working on my soul. Nothing but the rest of me. I see in every way, says I see everyday another face infront of me. And Everytime I see your face and it breaks me down physically. but the 21 questions to figure out someone new, just isn't me. I mean I'm running around mentally. Zoned out wondering what's best for me. Even when I fall. I'll stand then move on to what's next for me. No love in a minute. But this loot stacking heavenly
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3: I admit it, every other step I got finish. Broke is it. Don't worry who did it. Now it's fuck women, all these bitches on some shzzit. Another story different time I cant spill it. Bitch wit it, pretty face won't hit it, stupid feelings, on a time miss position. Luck is it? Left out as a kid and now I'm stuck issa place with no gimmicks, Drowning inna bottom of a bottle that I finished. Stumbled around lost but mind ya business. This isssa story unfinished. Drawn my sorrows with a fine point bic. Use my energy on something worth living. Can't quit it. I know this life is a bitch. But I won't give in, I swear my lifes worth living.
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4: I've been fucking up. Trynna save my soul to better health. I've been fucked up. Drinking everynight avoiding myself. I've had bad nights. And weak times. I've had bandages and cut lines. I've had fines and done crimes. Life or death moments I've had mine. I've had my lifetime to see the signs but still everytime it's still just mine. Just mine in the aspect I'm alone. But all this just needed time is why I'm whole. Two months ago I lost everything I had known. Cridentials all gone and so was my home. Family gone I felt so alone. As a messenger from God. I woke up in a different zone, everything I have now I did it on my own. No more walking I'm cruising home, no more talking these actions show. Got no house but my place a home. I got no time but for the love of my own.
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Would you flop if I said hello if I wanted to talk to you and see my big boy. Or if I said I just want to see white boy and how he’s grown. Would that be okay or just a no. Could I walk with him without you having to go. Could I wrestle with him as he use to know. Just for a bit then I promise I will go. I know this won’t be seen but if so please lmk. He’s still my baby boy as is mine so you don’t owe. Just curious if that’s a possibility or no? But ig nothing will show
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