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you're just jealous because they draw me with shark teeth to indicate my rowdy personality

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why are dudes in fanfic always getting hit with freight train orgasms. why not an orient express orgasm, classy and romantic. where are the shinkansen train orgasms? his orgasm hit him like the TGV atlantique breaking the passenger rail speed record. like the shanghai maglev, his orgasm was a feat of engineering but something of a commercial disappointment.

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Quetzalcoatlus! poised to spear her prey!

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I did this to help illustrate a point I'm making in a different post, but I feel it's relevant above and beyond that specific context.

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TIL that Gothic literature makes a distinction between “terror” and “horror.” Terror is the sense of dread and apprehension that precedes an experience, horror is the sense of revulsion after an experience.

via ift.tt

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im glad you’re back

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People with shit eyesight whenever they're around other people with shit eyesight start passing around their glasses like it's a blunt rotation just to see how blind everyone else is.

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new rule you have to live to be 34. you cant kill yourself until you turn 34. jesus died at 33 you can do better

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girl unhinge ur jaw

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why do you and others like vaccines so much?

not dying of preventable diseases is actually one of my favorite hobbies

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like damn I thought I had self esteem issues but elon musk is fifty years old eleventy seven children infinite money and he spends all hours of the lord’s day and night making sock puppet accounts to defend his own posts this is being a loser on a scale that can only be measured with a geiger counter

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technically we’re ALL, always LARPing, because the Self is only a construct,

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At least we have jacking off

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I don’t care if you make fun of Catholicism as long as it’s accurate! The best humour has its roots in the truth.

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Growing up is actually all about realizing people don’t inherently dislike you and it’s a bit odd to assume they do