Eddie: Well I’m sorry, but not all of us are perfect and can breathe easily out of both nostrils.
Steve:
Robin: my aunt had a deviated septum and had to have surgery. Her left nostril whistled.
Steve:
Eddie: See? At least it doesn’t whistle!
Steve: I only asked if you needed a Kleenex
Eddie: no thank you, babe
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this is prelude of that angst ghoap x reader (or, johnny and you sleep together for a secret third thing—your mutual love for simon).
you played with the ends of your shirt, trembling fingers feeling numb. it’s already cold outside, and your thin sweater isn’t cutting it—the draft pierces through the fabric, razing your aching body with a sharp chill. still, you couldn’t make yourself come back in, your mind weighed down by the turmoil bubbling in your heart.
you don’t know when the hesitation began, but it settled deep in the crevices of your ribs, making home in the spaces and ridges, bloating until it is all that you are aware of.
it stings.
this feeling you’re carrying, unnamed at most, stings. it was a sharp pain that never left, stabbing into muscle until it feels like a constant bruise. like skin welting, unable to find rest with the constant pressure.
you try to trace when it all began, but you know you don’t truly need to look further—the realization happened on a quiet sunday morning, when the lieutenant stumbled into the mess hall and nodded at you in lieu of a greeting.
you don’t know what it was exactly that made you realize—was it the sun, hitting his masked face ever so softly, making his eyes sparkle like they were made of agate? or was it the quiet way he set about preparing morning drinks for the squad? coffee for mactavish, tea for garrick, and, oddly, tepid water for the captain. or was it the way he murmured your name when he asked if there was something else you would want? another cup of your coffee? or would you want to drink tea, with milk and honey just like you prefer?
you didn’t even know he knew what you liked to drink—mactavish was your closest acquaintance, and you’re sure that he doesn’t even know anything about you past your focal interest in jigsaw puzzles.
(it’s the only thing he gifts you for your birthdays. you learned quick that this is his way to tell you that you mean so much to him.
in return, johnny is the first person you show your completed puzzles to.)
you told your lieutenant that you want the tea, if it was alright with him. he said it was no bother, and you sat there, watching this boogeyman that has people cowering in fear and even pissing their trousers in their terror make you a cup of warm tea, fluffed with milk.
he placed it in front of you with a quiet grunt.
thanks, you said.
of course, he replied.
you like ghost, you realized as you breathed in the wafting aroma. you have loved him for a while, in fact, and now you are unable to take the admission back.
you can’t put the toothpaste back into the tube, your mother used to say about situations like this. tea stains when it is spilled.
“god,” you murmur to yourself, pressing your palms to your eyes as though by doing so it could smother the familiar prickling feeling of the tears rising, ready to spill. “god.”
-
mactavish noticed just within three days after your own realization.
“i’m sorry,” you murmur, your lips wobbling as you try to tamp down the tears. “johnny, you know i didn’t mean to. please—”
“of course,” he says, cutting you off. his lips tug up in that heartbreakingly vulnerable of a smile that has your heart twinging with guilt. “he’s a good man, isn’t he? so really, it’s no shocker here that you like him too.”
he doesn’t say love. he couldn’t say it, not with the weight of his own denial of his feelings.
“yeah,” you warble out. “he’s a good man.”
johnny laughs and pulls you in his arms, covering you with his warm embrace.
the silence settles, and the cold air hangs, and you and johnny know that this realization of both of your heart’s desires is just the start of an agonizing journey.
(he kisses you three weeks later.
“please,” it’s his turn to say, his heartache vivid in the turmoil in his eyes.
“of course,” you echo his words back to him.)
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