#actually cptsd

[aurangg]

I wish not having friends wasn’t seen as such a loser, weirdo, and lame thing. I wish having a lack of emotion and empathy wasn’t seen as creepy or cruel. I wish being aplatonic and not having platonic attraction or being aromantic and not having romantic attraction wasn’t seen as some undesirable thing.

I’m not a robot. I’m not boring and uninteresting. I just experience the world around us much differently to you. I’ve seen things you couldn’t even dream of. I’ve experienced things you wouldn’t wish on anybody.

[recoverr]

i don't know who needs to hear this, but guilt, self-hatred and shame are not sustainable sources of growth and healing. you can't hate yourself into feeling better, or being better. you can't repeatedly punish yourself for your flawed humanity and expect wholesome results.

[starfishinthedistance]

I talk to many people who say things like "oh I have trauma but I don't have PTSD", but then when I talk to them a little more I realize that they most likely do, they just can't recognize it as such due to how lacking PTSD awareness is, even beyond the whole "it's not just a veteran's disorder" thing.

The main reason they think they don't have PTSD usually has to do with flashbacks and nightmares, either they have one but not the other or have neither. But here's the thing, those are only two symptoms out of the 23-odd recognized symptoms. Flashbacks and nightmares are two of the five symptoms under Criterion B (Intrusion), which you only need one of for a diagnosis. The other three symptoms are unwanted upsetting memories, emotional distress after being reminded of trauma and physical reactivity after being reminded of trauma (i.e. shaking, sweating, heart racing, feeling sick, nauseous or faint, etc). Therefore you can have both flashbacks and nightmares, one but not the other, or neither and still have PTSD.

In fact, a lot of the reasons people give me for why they don't think they have PTSD are literally a part of the diagnostic criteria.

"Oh, I can barely remember most parts of my trauma anyway." Criterion D (Negative Alterations in Cognition and Mood) includes inability to recall key features of the trauma.

"Oh but I don't get upset about my trauma that often because I avoid thinking of it or being around things that remind me of it most of the time." Criterion C (Avoidance) includes avoiding trauma-related thoughts or feelings and avoiding trauma-related external reminders, and you literally cannot get diagnosed if you don't have at least one of those two symptoms.

"Oh I just have trouble getting to sleep or staying asleep, but I don't have nightmares." Criterion E (Alterations in Arousal and Reactivity) includes difficulting sleeping outside of nightmares.

"But I didn't have many/any trauma symptoms until a long time after the trauma happened." There's literally an entire specification for that.

Really it just shows how despite being one of the most well-known mental illnesses, people really don't know much about PTSD. If you have trauma, I ask you to at least look at the criteria before you decide you don't have PTSD. Hell, even if you don't have trauma, look at the criteria anyway because there are so many symptoms in there that just are not talked about.

PTSD awareness is not just about flashbacks and nightmares.

[honeypleasejustkillme]

who else mourning the person they could've been if they were treated kindly as a child

[ed-recoverry]

To anyone who was suicidal at age 14 or younger, here’s your permission to grieve. Here’s your permission to not joke about it or just flat out ignore it. Here’s your permission to acknowledge that lost child who felt way more pain than any child should ever feel. You’re allowed to cry for that child, whether you healed or are still suffering the same thoughts. Finally allow yourself to grieve for that child filled with undeserved hurt.

[gh0stgirl-hotline]

Born to love cursed to be unlovable

[flittermousemoth]

Self-aware of my self-destruction, yet unable to stop myself.

[incredibly-deadly-viper]

This is just gonna be me yelling into the void but!! peoples reactions to ‘baby reindeer’ are pissing me off and its so obvious they don’t understand CPSTD!!! ‘omg why did he try to relive his trauma’ ‘why did he go back to his groomer’ ‘hes a weirdo for getting off to his stalker’ these are all totally common reactions to sexual trauma!!! shakinf you by the shoulders.. saying shit like that is only reinforcing to the people who have experienced similar and related to that show that their trauma reactions are gross or make them stupid or a bad person. grooming and sexual trauma fuck you up real bad!!! its normal to act irrationally or in a way which makes the situation worse!! its common to try to re-experience it to try to take control! and its still! never! your! fault! screams!

[unstablemotions]

Hey, you! You who suspect you might have PTSD, DID or another trauma disorder, but you think you didn't experience trauma "bad enough" to have developed a mental disorder from it? Let me suggest looking at it differently:

"If there's smoke, there's fire"

Do you experience symptoms of PTSD, such as hypervigilance, trouble sleeping, flashbacks, memory problems, dissociation, ect? Then yes, it was "bad enough". Maybe you don't remember anything "really bad" happening or you don't "feel like" it affects you, but listen to your body. The body remembers and the body doesn't care if you think it is "stupid" or "weak" to have a panic attack when someone touches you or that you still have nightmares about that thing you saw when you were 4 years old

Trauma isn't what happened. Trauma is the reaction to what happened. So what I'm trying to say is that if the reason you think you can't have PTSD/DID/OSDD/ect is because you didn't go through anything horrific enough for that, then maybe forget about what happened to you for a moment and just look at the evidence your body and mind are showing. And then, most importantly, be compassionate with yourself. You're going through a lot and it's gonna be okay in the end. Take it easy, okay? <3

[to0needy]

i don’t know who i am anymore, there’s too many versions of “me”

[systemofmemes]

EDIT: sorry but I have to put a disclaimer, no it doesn't have to just be trauma and it could just be a bad memory or some other condition, it's okay if this does not apply to you, it's okay if you just have a bad memory without trauma, there is more than one way for things to exist

[yourhealingjournal]

actually, to have the audacity to live, to take up space, is the scariest and most rewarding gift you can give yourself.

[nothing0fnothing]

being like this and living with someone who doesn't understand is so hard.

[ed-recoverry]

Shoutout to people who “just” have anxiety and depression. I’m sorry the severity of your disorders are downplayed. I know from personal experience, when I was dealing with “just” anxiety and depression, that this was something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Depression is severe. Anxiety is severe. There is no “just” anxiety and depression.

[theinsomniacindian]

"My child is fine-"

Your child is so lonely and emotionally numb that they cope by living in a dream world to the point where they are terrified of living in reality itself

[adustoflove]

professionally diagnosed with people treated me like absolute shit so now I'm mentally fucked for life disorder