wheresmyicarus

[wheresmyicarus]

This just chefs kiss, I have no comment <3

andrew is so real for thinking neil is a hallucination cos now that we have outsider pov on him it's actually insane that he's a real person. like this is neil josten: he's the prettiest boy you've ever met. he's the runaway son of a serial killer. he has a million dollars but is afraid of spending money. he folds his clothes a specific way so he can tell when someone's gone through his stuff. he keeps a stalker's journal on the two greatest exy players of all time. he wears coloured contacts and they're brown. he paid a busboy $100 to knock him out cold. he insulted a celebrity athlete on live tv after trying to keep a low profile. he says he's trying to stay alive while running towards death like it's a race. he mouths off to the mafia. he respects your boundaries and is the first person ever to take you at face value and not consider you an out of control psychopath. he orders hits on your abusers. he has the most electric blue eyes you've ever seen. he looks great in clubbing clothes but dresses like he's homeless. he insults someone for their "intricate and endless daddy issues" while his father is a convicted mobster and serial killer. he didn't give a fuck when his teammate was killed. everyone seems to like him even though it's clear he's hiding a million secrets. he doesn't catch on to the many many hints you're giving him. he calls you out not for being a danger to others but for being a danger to yourself. he thinks you should be protected as well as trusting you to protect him (and you think, how can someone be a victim and a protector?). he doesn't give a flying fuck what literally anyone thinks about him. he comes back from being waterboarded and tortured and abused for weeks (to protect you) and is still as feisty and bitchy as before. except now he's a redhead and has many more scars. he is possibly the first person to ever make the active decision to protect you. he's willing to put himself in harm's way again and again and again so he won't lose you. he always has a cigarette but he never smokes. he says "you're not actually a sociopath are you?" and "the next time someone calls you soulless i might have to fight them". even though he's messy and a little oblivious he's sees you. he might be the only person to ever want you off your drugs. he wants to see you lose control, is aware that you're not out of control, you're actually so controlled and restrained all of the time and he wants to see you feel something, he wants you to be angry, be angry at him. he riles you up on purpose to see you show emotion, feel something. he's a runner and yet he's still possibly the bravest person you've ever met. he gets kidnapped and comes back even more bruised and battered than before and he's still a mouthy little shit who bitches at the press and cuts deals with the yakuza. he's most of the reason why the worst team in the nation ends up winning championships. he shoves a guy clean off his feet because they body checked you. he punched celebrity athlete riko moriyama in public, for you. he threatens him, for you. he's almost killed on live tv. he mouths off to the fbi. he watches the (second) best exy player in the world get shot. he also watches his father, notorious serial killer and gangster, get shot in front of him. and he laughs. he smiles. he kisses you and is never gonna run again and he's free and he wants to be with you, he wants you.

[wheresmyicarus]

i see the vision

i love how kevin day's role is that of the dead wife that haunts the narrative (in aftg AND tsc) even tho he isn't dead idk if you see the vision

[wheresmyicarus]

thinking about how neil says jean is a survivor not a fighter and thinking about how jeremy says he is a starving dog and thinking about kevin saying "if you tell him to submit he will" and thinking about jean giving rhemann the racquet and thinking about contrition and thinking about jean asking and expecting to be punished and not fighting back AND ALSO thinking about how nora said jean went to evermore angry and betrayed like if you shoved a cat into a box closed the lid shook it and opened it again and how the cat is jean and thinking about how jean was angry and all claws and teeth when he first showed up at evermore and thinking about jean saying he would tear out kevin's throat with his teeth and thinking about jean wanting to punch jeremy for treating him with too much caution and thinking about jean biting back every time lucas insulted him and thinking about how jean is at once defeated and depressed and unwilling to fight back or fight for himself and also so insanely angry all of the fucking time and how he had (has?) so much passion and emotion and rage that got tortured out of him during his time at evermore but did it really?

[wheresmyicarus]

cigarette pls

[wheresmyicarus]

dream tiles for a sunroom <3

Tiles! I want to have a kitchen wall full with different designs