#of sorts???
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MY HAND SLIPPED
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Friendship with genki has ended - pixiv novels is now my best friend 🤝
#it's how i learned English tbh#and now I'm literally in a translation BA...#also - i can't bring myself to read boring textbook practice texts#with fanfiction I've got a lot more motivation lol#japanese langblr#of sorts???
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Unless You Ask Me To
buck/eddie | very minor eddie/omc | 279K | WIP | AO3
It’s not the first time a man has ever looked at Eddie a certain way. It’s not the first time a man has ever hit on him or asked him out. It happens every so often. Not a lot. Once every six months or so? If he had to put a number to it?
But maybe it’s the first time Eddie’s actually considered saying yes.
He’s in a much better place than he was a year ago, and he’s never actually dated that many people. He met Shannon when he was nineteen and high school relationships didn’t really count, and he was technically married until not quite four years ago. And there was only one huge, sad mistake since then.
So, Eddie could say yes.
He could go on a date with this beautiful, nice man. That is a thing he can do. And maybe it would be good. Maybe it would explain a lot of things he’s always wondered about but never put into practice.
~~~
Eddie dates a man for the first time, Buck is completely Fine(tm) and not at all having a breakdown, and the way to love and happiness is not easy but they find it anyway.
(read on AO3)
#buddie#buddie fic#jenwyn fic#911#911fic#fic: unless you ask me to#s6 speculation#of sorts???#not really but close enough#why can I never write short things#why#also why do I have to work at all?#why can we not just read and write fic all day?
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If i analyzed a mitski song through a kuwameshi lens would u care…
i just think it kinda fits as a yusuke pov is all! like here let me just-
what if yusuke wanted to be held. he hasn't been held since he was a child and had no one but a mother too young to know how to do it right. what if all of a sudden he had someone to depend on no matter how hard he bit and fought and clawed. kuwabara has his back in fights, in life, so why not be at his back in the quiet intimacy of night. maybe i can kiss your fingers for a change instead of breaking them. i can be soft. i can want soft sometimes. but it's a pointless desire because kuwabara has potential yusuke doesn't see in himself. a chance to be "normal" and "successful" away from the destruction and strife that seems to lick at yusuke's heels. all yusuke has is this man eating demon heritage and a ramen cart. so he can send kuwa off with a smile, call him college boy to further separate himself from what kuwa has the chance to achieve.
i will compare kuwabara to the sun until i die. he's bright, he saves with his light. when he smiles he beams. even his aura is yellow and hot and beautiful like the sun the very center of our existence. of yusuke's galaxy, his universe even if that doesn't make sense. and kuwabara knows what it's like. his childhood wasn't much better than yusuke's. and still somehow he came out the other side shining while yusuke belongs to the night. a creature of the night. not even a part of the grand solar system just some thing that is wrong and rough and hurting that wanted to hurt in turn. still he can't help but open a little for the sun. maybe like a morning glory. he can't bring himself to be direct can't take that leap. but he can sing for the birds to pass messages for him. little touches, sweet moments that can be laughed off if necessary, hugs they pretend didn't happen. those are his song.
do not wait!! i'm not for this place and you're meant for better so don't waste your time on something like me. there's this divide. human and demon. sun and the monster undeserving of its rays.
you'd think that because their situations were similar shizuru and atsuko would be thick as thieves but i feel like there'd be a disconnect. a sort of envy on atsuko's side and judgement on shizu's. maybe shizuru sees this child her brother brings home unattended and mean and unwilling to be cared for and she gets it but also she doesn't. because kazu isn't like that so what could've happened? yusuke knows shizuru feels bad for him, for how he was brought up but he can't bring himself to share the sentiment. he's glad for his mother even. her willingness to tell him how it is. to make sure when the world punched him he punched back ten times as hard. to not get to attached because it only hurts when you get left behind.
Kuwabara is...he really is a man amongst men. he is just that good. he's got honor, he has respect, he can do the yes ma'ams and no sirs, he can also rile you up if need be. he can raise his abysmal grades just by believing he can. he can defend he can protect he can be strong he can be sweet. he can be confident and vulnerable. he's just everything you can wish for in the guy you wanna take home to meet your parents. and yusuke wants. he doesn't want to want but he does. he wants to be worthy of that guy.
if. well when it all comes crashing down because yusuke cannot keep things afloat he doesn't keep connections he breaks and breaks and breaks. kuwabara is everything he could ever want wrapped up in one person and that's exactly why he knows he'll fuck it up because urameshi yusuke cannot keep a good thing. he shouldn't have tried it in the first place
and maybe his mom was wrong. wrong in what she taught him. the lessons she gave. but at some point down the line yusuke can realize it's not always learning what to do. but what not to do. and because kuwabara is this perfect guy he will never give up on yusuke even if he fucks up. so the least he can do is put that same effort in. maybe he understands his mother more the less he becomes like her.
#kuwameshi#yusuke urameshi#kazuma kuwabara#shizuru kuwabara#atsuko urameshi#your best american girl#character analysis#of sorts???#anyways#long post#yu yu hakusho#kuwabara kazuma#i should mention i do think atsuko and shizuru would get along after spending some time together#gain an understanding if that makes sense#like shizu wasn't a teen mom but she also was and atsuko did what she could even if she could've done better#like by the time the dark tournament rolls around they're 🤝🏼#i feel like yusuke does very much see kuwa as this untouchable thing#you'll burn up before you ever get close enough to the sun to touch it#kuwa feels much the same about yusuke ofc. like neither is worthy of the other or smth#yusuke putting kuwa on a pedestal furthering a separation that kuwa tries desperately to close
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If you receive this, you make somebody happy! Go on anon and send this to ten of your followers who make you happy or somebody you think needs cheering up. If you get one back, even better! <333
There's two more of these!
Thank you all so so much! All three of you! <3
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I was feeling agitated and artblocked yesterday so I decided to give my brain a rest by watching TV and then the next thing I knew these were in front of me
#what did they put in Phineas and Ferb that inspires these sort of deranged comics in people. this is my own personal MOM HOLY FUCK#long post
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#comics#artists on tumblr#dragons#foolfortune#i've been thinking about what if dragons were common household pests in wales#and thought it would be nice if they had somewhere safe to go#trap and release sort of deal
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[on the verge of having a complete breakdown] i need to make some kind of list or perhaps sort things into categories
#🌿 misc#idk how to tag this#i just love making lists#and sorting things into categories#pinterest#??#this is part of what motivates me to write i just love making lists of scenes and then sorting them into categories#bangers
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miku but she’s in a medieval manuscript
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u ever see someone with extremely fucked up views (or actions) and think wowww if a couple of things in my life went the tiniest bit differently that would have been me
#iso.txt#i feel like i have the right kind of mindset to have been radicalised into some . not good things if i hadnt seen reason#like the right set of neuroses and stuff.#briefly i guess i was.#i honestly still sort of struggle sometimes to convince myself of some things i *know* i should believe i know are right. idk.
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glad that im not popular enough to have an evil shadow version of my blog that exists just to make contradictions on my posts
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@schnuffel-danny hehehe
regarding this post: from schnuffle
#jackal shenanigans#danny phantom#skeh#dp x spn#supernatural#superphantom#castiel#dean winchester#sam winchester#danny fenton#6/17/24#hehehe I’m on some sort of crack or something I’m so happy to be out of artblockkkkkk thank u schnuffllle ily you cured me#also somrhging abt that rb chain rubbed me the wrong way I had to refocus and drew this before I could answer lol
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#i don't believe that people for serious reasons sort their books any way but by author#and then obviously by release date/series within that#i am being told that i am being JUDGY#also if you sort your books any other way HOW DO YOU FIND THEM#i really need to know#polls#can't believe i forgot to include genre in here
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Bill’s cringefail attempt at a serenade
#my art#digital art#gravity falls#bill cipher#stanford pines#billford#I guess#in the toxic divorced exes sort of way
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i am a being capable of immeasurable love and whimsy
#and also. am a ilittlel kitty :3#mine#cats#brain empy. felt tip cats ONLY#we were promised snow today n then they decided actually :) rain all day for u#i bought new wool for a cardigan today im SO excited its gna be so colourful#i was going to do some sort of Thing on the back like a heart or something but im still too scared to do colour changing stuff#maybe....maybe next time#i think i will try a patter w like. an actual grid with it first rather than just rawdog it#bc i . do not know what im doing :3
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