#i didnt have anything to post today and i remembered i never posted these cause i hated the coloring - THESE WERE SO YELLOW I HATEEEEEED IT

[yooboobies]

angel ⋆:･ﾟ

{cr. 0613data}

[ofbreathandflame-archive]

I think the best argument against "He didnt have a choice" ( i think this is why choice is rhysands favorite word 🥴) is you're right, he didn't. The AUTHOR did. Sjm had a choice and still she went for the worst and more illogical one. She still decides to put the women in her series under awful situations without further consequences. I really dislike phrases like "my characters wanted me to write them that way" or "my characters lead the story". Im always yes this is a romantic way to see the writing process but ill never forget this author who said "my characters do whatever the hell I want them to do".

hi anon!!!! (sorry this is a super old anon that i actually finished writing a while ago sorry nonny💙. can’t think of anything to say so im just posting old stuff in my drafts today 🫶🏾)

i agree! its a problem on multiple different levels. for one, sjm often relies on telling the audience what we should get out of a scene, instead of what allowing us to form our own takeaways. its a very hand-holding type of storytelling; in consequence, the 'evidence' being derived is often contradictory to actual events. like the story can argue that "change is slow," and thats why illyria and the con persist, but that statement is consistently proven to be incorrect.

lets look at how invalid the idea of 'change is slow is'

in one year - feyre is able to become high lady, effectively creating an entirely new governing system, in which, a high lord can give a person absolute power of the court (remember - what feyre and rhysand say is 'law'). there is no process, no objection, or any fear of reprimand. rhys doesn't even have to consult his second-in-command. not only that - but feyre is also allowed power over the court of nightmares, which politically, is supposedly an entirely different governing state. again - keir and devlon are not consulted about this.

it took six months to produce to first illyrian female warrior to complete the rite in history. in the span of six months - emerie completes the rite. thats more illyrian women than rhys, az, and cass's entire 300-400 year reign.

it takes feyre less than a month to completely cause an entire court to fall - yet regimes such as tam's father, beron, and amarantha somehow persisted as long as they despite them being canonically worse rulers. even - and i mean even - if tamlin was the worst leader to have ever walked this earth, it would still take more than three to four weeks. and factoring in that this is a population of immortal, canonically 'slow-to-change' individuals.......

like - how slow can the change actually be? how can the book possibly explain how such drastic changes happen from book to book but not in 400 years? how come there have been no illyrian women in the army or in the rite if cassian and rhys have earnestly been working with the females in illyria? even the few moments we see them at illyria, they still seem to be at a rudimentary level; there's no established female training areas, no veteran trainees, no consequences for breaking the law in regards to the females...there's nothing that suggests any actual measures have been taken.

that's just one example of 'canon' statements acting in contradiction the previously established pieces of information. more - its a consistent pattern of contradiction in regards to certain characters. its their natural characterization acting against the forced narrative voice.

and this makes it problem on mulitiple fronts.

and even more, off the point you made about the women in her stories - i think there needs to be a larger conversation had about the patterns of female violence in these books; specifically the role that female violence plays in establishing sexual tension and relationships in general. or...the amount of times the female protagonist has to undergo some extreme form of humiliation at the behest of future love interest; there's an utter lack of this with the men.

sjm is a very intentional author - these problems exist because of how intentional she is as a writer. i know exactly the function of each scene, exactly what emotion the she wants me to feel. this is not because these characters are written well, but because we are often just told it. feyre can 'express' disdain for rhysand'a actions, but she often undermines her own inner thoughts about the issue. feyre’s inner thoughts are often abuse apologist 101 and in retrospect it’s kind of painful the way she consistently makes excuses for rhys, even when it’s her well-being being threatened and undermined. and that’s honestly bc sjm’s narrative voice supersedes the natural characterization of her characters. sjm doesn’t know how to organically create conflict between characters she actually likes bc she doesn’t know how to write conflict. it’s a consistent pattern in her series and it’s why all the villains suck and all battles ultimately fall flat.

but the problem becomes a bit broader (i.e. this is a larger issue in publishing and literary crit). some of the arguments that i see often, and that i referenced in my last post are these:

"why read this this book if you don't like the characters?" "why continue to read the book if you don't like it?" "this is a book about fairy porn - why are you analyzing it." "i read for fun." (this is not a bad statement, but it becomes troublesome in the context i will explain)

the commonality between these statements is that they are avoidant. often, they are employed when people can't explain away the amounting problems in the series, so they avoid the conversation.

because for one, you should never (and I means NEVER) say that a piece of literature should not be analyzed. or that fantasy negates interrogation into harmful themes. that’s just anti intellectual nonsense. second, if we’re arguing about real world issues bc of the book; of if your argument is that tamlin is abusive bc he did abusive things, then you literally can’t make this argument. the whole point of moving from tam is bc he was…abusive. abuse is not a fantasy. regardless of what the author intends, if a character is abusive or does absuive things, we should be looking at that.

look…if you are defending rhys using the logic the book establishes please have it. but the moment you implicate real-world values into this story, you’ve got to see it to the end. the same goes for the series as a whole: the second maf decided to integrate a ‘domestic violence plot lines’ specifically referring to behaviors as ‘red flags’ it immediately kind of gave up the kind of distance the fantasy romance genre usually gives to such issues.

[monggay]

holy fucking shit you guys. um. i came across. a treasure trove. of um, my past self. came across an old group chat w some friends back when i was like, 12-13, and. holy shit.

good news: apparently i did use to be somewhat talkative and not quite as anxious to talk and interact ! i used to be able to carry conversations! not well or inawkwardly but very much plenty! i used to be able to talk and joke around without taking a million psychic damage just trying to send a message and even just saying whats on my mind carefree without being anxious that itll be weird or that they didnt want me to say that or that i didnt have to scramble for words or be unable to come up with quips or anything to reply other than just 'lol' or 'lmao'!! i feel like these days i only know how to talk and word things in a given or meme way aka all my vocabulary is just. tumblr memes.

bad news: holy fucking shit i was so cringe. like. on another level. on levels unimaginable. i was straight up just. weird. you know, horny preteen discovering sex jokes and crude language and sex humor for the first time? straight up had no filter, loved to ramble, except also had zero social sense still and rambled to a weird and overly and uncomfortable degree where it was just awkward and often said things that just. made the conversation weird? i embraced that weirdness and like, good on me i guess, but i think i just usually ended up saying things? blurting anything on my mind, that well. technically arent bad? or seriously fucked up or anything but just like. will probably haunt me for the rest of my life if i look at it now.

also like. i dont remember any of it ??????? i vaguely remember a Few conversations, but a lot of it? just straight up. unfamiliar to me who the fuck is that i dont remember saying any of that shit that past me is so fundamentally different and alien to me i literally dont recognize or remember anything i did then anymore

apparently i was just a giant nerd who read way too much smut and was just a little too unashamed and had very little sense of appropriateness which yeah i get given my age then its that. age of you know. just got exposed to people being vulgar, recently transitioned to high school from elementary, which is probably like. a way more. fucked up thing that people realize sometimes. cause in elementary i always thought i was still like you know. a little kid. but going into high school (which is younger than in US hs, at 12 y/o) youre suddenly treated or like, expected? to be older? more knowleadgeable? you know that thing about how kids these days are all trying to be adults now and how theres really no more media like the disney teenage live shows that separate little girl to grown lady? i think that jut like, hit me a lot in 7-8th grade + the introduction of nsfw shit and fandom and the internet (cause like. i did not have internet in elementary school, At All. and then suddenly in high school i was supposed to have a messenger account for school, i had a phone, i could use the laptop, i think i had a weird relationship w the internet then, cause at that point all my friends were already exploring facebook and posting etc, but i was so anxious and shy about that already that i just never started (which like, continues to today, i still dont use fb at all, cuase it feels so weird and awkward to start now when i was so adamant against not using it in the past) aaaand ive lost my train of thought and the point of this sentence

[violetwinterwidow01]

MEMORY LANE (AU)

A/N: I meant to post this Jan. 1st, 2024, but never got around to it!!!

Feel free to reblog!!!

ENJOY

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

It's Cevyn and Bucky's 4th wedding anniversary, and their 9th best friend anniversary. But since Buck is on a mission, Cev has nothing better to do than go down memory lane from when they first go together.

Quick timeline:

Besties: Dec. 31st, 2014

Dated: Dec. 31st, 2016

Married: Dec. 31st, 2020

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Cevyn walks into the common living room finding Natasha, Yelena, and Clint.

Cevyn: hey guys

C/Y/N: hey! Happy anniversary!!!

Cevyn: Thank you, lovelies!!!

She joins them on the couch as they indulge in some action movie.

Yelena: We know it was yesterday and Bucky couldn't be here.

Cevyn: it's fine, I told him I'd figure out what I wanted by the time he got back today.

They hum.

Out of nowhere, She decides to ask a question.

Cevyn: ...Ya'll remember when i was such a whore back in 2021?

Yelena: SUCH A WHORE!!!

Natasha: ABSOLUTELY, HOW THE HELL COULD WE FORGET!?!?

Yelena: WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!?!

The girls talk over each other making Cevyn laugh, while Clint violently chokes and spits out his beer. Cevyn and Natasha tap him on his back.

Cevyn: Yo, you good?

Clint: *cough, cough* No, no!!! *cough* Im not good!! I- I dont think i should be listening to this!!!

Natasha and Yelena laugh. He tries to get off the couch but nat pulls him back down and crosses her legs over top of his motioning Cevyn to do the same to keep him there. She lays her head in Yelena's lap.

Natasha: Sit down, she was a menace last year. youll wanna hear this!

He gives up. Sounds like good tea any damn way. (We all know Clint is one of the girls!!!)

Yelena: Cevy, what happened?

Cevyn: well after my 2 year relationship failed, i decided to have some... fun. Safe fun.

Natasha: Yeah, a WHOLE year worth of 'fun'.

Clint: that asswhole cheated on you didnt he?

Cevyn: yup

Clint sighs.

Clint: Why didnt you call me?

Cevyn: Cause i handled it... no ones gonna miss him.

C/Y/N: WHAT!?!?

She laughs.

Cevyn: im kidding!... maybe.

Clint looks at nat.

Clint: And what do you mean by a whole year?

Nat sighs and rubs her temples at the very fond memories of the year before.

Natasha: a different guy. Each day. 365 days in a year. You do the math.

Clint: CYNTHIA ELINA VALYN YAZMINE NOELLE STRYKER!!!

Cevyn side-eyes him at the use of her government name.

Clint: what the hell?!?! Didnt you have missions???

She smirks as Yelena burst out laughing.

Clint: my god

Cevyn: yup, i called upon him a couple of times. It was also more ladies than guys.

Yelena calms down from damn near dying.

Yelena: WHAT?!?! ARE YOU SAYING I COULDVE BEEN ONE OF THEM?!?!

Cevyn: im sorry baby, and it was only 364. I didnt have anybody on new years eve.

Yelena mumbles.

Yelena: could've had me...

Cevyn sits up and kisses her cheeks.

Cevyn: Maybe next time, boo. But Doesnt mean i didnt do anything though.

Yelena: whatd you do?

Cevyn: Well...

Flashback: Tony's Avengers ONLY New years eve pajama party 2021

Cevyn's PJs

(For once Tony didn't want a hell of a lot of people around.)

The party was BANGIN'!!! It was getting close to midnight, There was tons of liquor, everybody was dancing, Cevyn got so drunk she gave a full on lipsync concert. After that, she walked into the kitchen to grab some water.

When she walked in she saw her best friend Bucky and the one shady bitch she could never stand: Sharon. It seriously bothered her that bucky would choose that thing to date out of any woman in the world, which she reminded Buck daily about.

Theres a reason why Cevyn hates Sharon. Before Cevyn's last relationship, she caught the bitch sucking him off. After that, Sharon tried to act as if nothing ever happened. (Tryna be her friend and shit, bitch you know what the fuck you did!)

Finally, when she gave up and started dating Buck, Cev plotted her revenge. If bitches feel that they can take and play the delusional card, two can play that game. She walks over, purposely bumping Sharon out of the way to stand on her tiptoes wrapping her arms around his neck and planting a loving kiss on Bucky's cheek.

Bucky: Hi Cevy.

Cevyn: Hi Bucket.

Sharon scoffs as he wraps his arms around her voluptuous body, damn near feeling her up. He returns the kiss close to the corner of her mouth, a sight Sharon doesn't miss.

She shoves Cev out of the way. Cevyn was about to swipe Sharon across her face but Bucky caught her wrist and turned her around slowly.

As she opens the fridge she mumbles about how she was gonna snatch this hoe up by the hair on the nape of her neck and slang her on the floor resulting in dog walking her like the bitch she is.

Bucky: Sharon, the hell did you do that for?

Sharon: Oh, when she does it theres no problem, but when i do it there is?

Bucky scoffs, making Cev turn around snickering.

Bucky: Oh god, im not doing this with you.

Sharon walks away damn near on the brink of tears, which no one cares about. Bucky lets her go, reaching to grab a cupcake from the cake tower. As he grabs it, frosting gets on his metal thumb. Before he can grab a napkin, Cevyn takes his hand.

Cevyn: Dont worry, baby. Ill lick it up

Bucky: Its okay- oh shit!

Hes cut off as she latches her soft, plump lips around the tip of his thumb, gently sucking the tip. She pulls back with a pop that echos throughout the kitchen, even though the music is pretty loud.

Cevyn: What was that?

Bucky stumbles over his words trying to get out of the trance shes put him in.

Bucky: I-I- I dont-

Keeping eye contact, she kitten licks his thumb. She plays confused while smirking.

Cevyn: You dont what, baby? Whats wrong?

He continues to stammer and look between her eyes and her tongue rounding circles on his thumb, placing it back in her mouth.

Bucky: I dont know w-whats happening... but- but i like it.

She smiles. She moves to kiss his lips mumbling against them.

Cevyn: Mm-hm *kiss* I know you do *kiss* Keep your eyes on mommy, ok?

He nods absentmindedly slipping into a place he's never been before: ✨️SUBMISSION✨️ With his thumb back in its rightful spot, and continuous eye contact, she gets on her knees, holding his wrist, sucking faster. She unzips her onsie letting her tits spill out.

She places his right hand on her boob for him to squish. She moves her hand feeling him grow in his sweatpants. She moves off of his thumb to pull his sweats and boxers down to reveal his dick. Before he can say anything, shes fast like lightning, sucking his tip greedily then deepthroats him causing his knees to weaken and a string of 'holy fucks' to leave his mouth, catching him off guard. She giggles and moans sending vibrations around his shaft.

5 minutes go by and Sharon walks back in. She hears moans so she tries to be silent. She gets around the island and sees Cevyn on her knees with her eyes rolled back as Bucky fucks her throat. Cevyn looks over to see her standing with her jaw dropped. She sends her a menacing wink, smirking with her mouth full, cum dribbling down the side of her mouth.

She pulls away from Bucky swallowing every drop. She pulls up his sweats, using his thumb to swipe up his sweet sticky leftovers just to suck it off, and stands up to fix her clothes, but Bucky stops her picking her up to sit her on the island, and latches on to her nipple, making her laugh. She rubs her hands through his hair still eyeing up Sharon.

Cevyn: Enjoying the show?

Bucky turns his head, not so concerned about the situation at hand. Hes had a thing for Cev for a long time. But he made the mistake of dating Sharon to take his mind off of her. He smiles at her, picks up Cevyn wrapping her legs around his waist, walking out of the kitchen.

Cevyn: Paybacks a bitch, aint it?

Bucky: We're done Sharon.

Cevyn laughs. Bucky gets in the elevator.

Cevyn: where we going?

Bucky: To our floor. Where im gonna fuck you SENSELESS and make you cum so hard while we count down. Is that alright with you mama?

She smirks.

Cevyn: Yes, daddy.

End of flashback

As Nat and Yelena clapped and cheered, Clint sat puzzled.

Clint: didnt you ruin a relationship?

The girls laugh.

Cevyn: More like rescued Bucky because that shit show was doomed from the beginning. He's mine now, and I don't plan on letting him go anywhere.

Buck sneaks up behind. He gently pulls her head back, planting multiple kisses on her lips putting a smile on her face.

Cevyn: Hi baby.

Bucky: Hi mama. Happy anniversary.

Cevyn: happy anniversary. Oh, speaking of...

She gets up, rounding the couch.

Cevyn: I know what I wanna do now.

Bucky: Whats that?

She whispers in his ear.

Cevyn: Mind-blowing, life-altering, earth-shattering sex.

Without a second thought, he taps her thighs, signaling her to jump up.

Bucky: SOLD!!!

He runs them out of the room.

C/Y/N: BYE GUYS!

C/B: BYE!

Cevyn: IF YOU HEAR SCREAMING, ITS NOT ME!!!!

FIN.

[dykevanny]

OKAY WOO

so basically yeah vanessas plural. like she doesnt Know but she is. she just thinks shes super forgetful (amnesia from when her headmate fronts) and her days are pretty routine so shes not alarmed when she cant pick out what exactly she did and just thinks today was extra boring.

VANESSAS HEADMATE okay i dont have a name for them yet but theyre more naive than and younger than vanessa. definitely closer to gregorys age, maybe a little older? havent decided lol. and theyre a little bunny with brown markings (<-yeah they based the initial mask off their own appearance. arent they adorable im love them..) and theyre the one who glitchtrap latched onto since he could take advantage of that disconnect between the two, and he manipulated them (they were really lonely since they couldnt really have friends of their own and couldnt talk to vanessa. its kinda like a one-way mirror for them - they can see in and hear vanessa, but she cant see out of the front to where they are, and if shes not fronting, she just doesnt remember anything.)

glitchtrap cant front (he doesnt have anywhere near that level of control) so he uses the headmate and guides them and talks to/manipulates them. cause they can front just fine!

i havent decided if he lets them remember killing or keeps the memories from them, but glitchtraps removal DOES snap them out of the brainwashing/manipulation sorta, and they feel really lost afterwards, and if they didnt remember before, then glitchtrap left them with the memories as a kinda fuck you to them. either way, super traumatized after the fact.

theres also kinda two paths i take with them towards the end, one is far more “supernatural” (but still sort of believable with fnaf) and the other definitely sticks to the realm of normalcy lol. the normal-er one has the headmate stay in post-3 star, and it basically involves freddy and gregory trying to figure out just why vanessa acts odd some days and then never remembers it (the headmate isnt so great at pretending to be vanessa. superficially its fine, coworkers and strangers didnt question it, but gregory and freddy? nah. they catch on quick). things are uncertain for a while but ultimately theyre all okay!! everyone gets along!!

the more supernatural one is specifically for my au that i have, its cassie-centric, and in this one, instead of leaving behind the headmate, he basically drags them down with him and they get trapped in the ar world, ironically keeping it safely out of glitchtraps reach cause that mf got absolutely obliterated while they basically got set onto the ground gently with a blanket and pillow.

i do intend to draw them eventually so if ur interested i could tag u! /gen

anyways, this is SO messy lol. i hope it makes Any Sense At All i love plural vanessa

ohhhhhh i really like this concept,,,,, the headmate being around Greg’s age esp… glitchtrap loves to manipulate children huh. (Looks at ggy) i like them staying around w 3star…. That’s fun:) also them being the bunnay -> the design for the mask is a really fun touch

[greydiminishing]

8/13/24

I wanna start journaling in the mornings. I think it'll be really helpful for me. I wanted to journal yesterday but i didnt get to it.

*Firstly, I'm feeling a lot better than I was a month or two ago. I checked my grades and I somehow actually passed all my classes. I'll make a post just on that though.

Yesterday was a nice day. I woke up to loud construction sounds and when I looked out my window, I saw half a tree hanging in the air! It was a tree removal service or something, probably because we had a crazy wind storm the other day and the tree must've gotten unstable. But I got to watch the workers chainsaw massive chunks of this tall tree, then secure it to the lifter with rope and watch it get lifted and "float" to the ground, where they chainsawed off the branches and then pushed it through the chipper. Pretty cool, 10/10 start to the morning even if it woke me up.

Then I made hot cocoa and buttered toast and I had an apple that was maybe the sugariest apple I've ever had. It was almost too sweet. Organic cosmic crisp only $2.99 for 3lbs at aldi! I'll have to bring a bag or 2 when I go back to school.

I didn't get much on my todo list done yesterday. I don't know how or why, when I felt so good and motivated in the morning. I think maybe I was enjoying my leisurely morning so much didn't want it to end. I did do my laundry though.

I've been having a lot of good days/good mornings because I've been taking my adderall. I've been taking it pretty consistently for 2-3 weeks now and the difference is night and day. I feel human. I feel functional. (Escaping the pit of despair I was in when I thought I failed all my classes definitely helped too).

Every time this happens, when I stop taking my adderall because I feel like I don't need it when I'm not in school or doing any work, I end up feeling like shit. And then I start taking it again and the world regains color. When will I learn.

~~~

I'm going to the mall with my friend today. We're gonna see a movie and eat some tacos. I'm excited and nervous. I shouldn't be nervous, but I am. I think it's because it's a 1-on-1 hangout, which I'm usually not good with, but I already know I'm fine with 1-on-1s with this friend.

I'm also a bit nervous because I'm taking the highway to get there. But I literally took the highway two days ago, for the first time EVER (by myself), and for the longest duration that I've ever driven (35 mins lol). So why am I nervous to take the highway a second time for a fraction of the duration?? Idk.

Also, that same day, I drove my other friend's dad home. I've never said more than "hello, how are you" to this man, and now we're in a car for a half hour while I'm driving on the highway for the second time in my life. And I did so good!! (Minus one stop sign I drove past when we got by their house :P) We had some conversation, and I changed lanes smoothly, and it was all good. I was so normal!!

This seems like something I would usually freak out about; driving and awkward social interactions, my two greatest fears (and thats not exaggeration, thinking about getting in an accident, and remembering my awkward social interactions are the two main things that keep me up at night. They cause me intense distress. They are also the two main causes of the weird twitch/tic things i get when i think about something bad). But I was actually so chill about it. If I can do that, I can do anything.

[raikkxz]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨ 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐋 𝐍 𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 (dr3) 𝐱𝐨 ୧˚

★ requested﹕yes/no — summary﹕ in which the writer, scar, doesnt know what to summarise this 😓 — warnings﹕established relatioinship, unnamed ex mentions, pet names, really short bc that's how i write my fics, probably not proof read well, lmk if there's anything i missed💗 — pairing﹕dr3 x f!reader — w/c﹕600+ ★ start a/n﹕hii angels!! late valentines post!! like i said in my last post, ill probably be using songs to base my fics off of, so here we are. i skipped some of the parts of the lyrics bc it wouldnt make sense/didnt fit, so sorry if youre listening to the song and reading this and it doesnt make sense 😓 hope you enjoy!! [italics are past moments/memories] ౨ৎ 𝑫𝑻 (tag list) ;; none yet but open :) based off of the song . . .

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notes, comments, reblogs, feedback and follows are greatly appriciated!

!!PLEASE DO NOT REPOST ON OTHER WEBISTES/APPS OR COPY MY ORIGINAL WORK!!

Could you tell where my head was at when you found me?

Me and you went to hell and back just to find peace

You heard a soft groan as you rubbed your eyes, wrapping yourself in the soft fabric of your bedsheets.

Eyelids heavy, your lips curl up into a smile.

Man, I thought I had everything, I was lonely

Now you're my everything, I was lonely

"Honey, would you do the honour of being my valentines?"

That sentence from the week prior replayed in your head over and over again. It was your first valentines together as boyfriend and girlfriend. You smiled to yourself as you remembered the time Daniel asked you on a date.

I mixed a lot of love with a lot of drugs, then I found you

She liked petty crimes, she had green eyes like Mountain Dew

And where she go, I'll never know

Her friends bounced too

"Oh please, don't waste your time on stupid men like him," Daniel put his arm around your waist. "I can do way better than that, buttercup. Especially for the fact, it's Valentines. His loss for leaving you. But my win for having you here with me." Daniel winks, his confidence never wavered and grin never leaving his face.

I guess it's their loss 'cause they'll never know what we'll amount to

Would you be my light, be my yellow?

"Morning, baby." You head a gruff yet muffled voice under the blanket, snapping you out of your thoughts. You giggle softly, lifting the covers from your boyfriend's face.

"Morning, love." You grin, leaning in and peppering his chin with kisses.

Your boyfriend chuckles, pulling you in. One thing about your boyfriend, for sure, is that he was never afraid to show his love and affection for you. "C'mere, honey, I'm cold." Daniel wraps his arms around you, kissing your shoulder.

You laughed softly. "Happy one year and valentines, Danny." You sigh happily, kissing the bridge of your boyfriend's nose.

"Happy one year and valentines to you too, honey bee." Daniel kisses your cheek. "I'm taking you out today."

You smile, "Oh? You didn't tell me we had plans. I would've woke up earlier."

Daniel grinned, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "I'm taking you out at night. It's a secret, love. But I promise you'll love it."

You chuckled, shaking your head. "Alright, Danny, you win this time. I'm all yours for the day."

P.Y.T walking down portobello

Put a smile on this face at the end of the day

MDMA helped us fly away

With that, you both got ready for your special Valentine's Day date night, stepping out into the cool evening air. Daniel offered you his arm, which you gladly accepted. You walked hand in hand, your heart fluttering with anticipation for the night ahead.

The city was alive with the buzz of Valentine's Day, lights twinkling overhead, and the faint scent of flowers lingering in the air. Daniel led you through the bustling streets with confidence, his presence reassuring and comforting.

Finally, you arrived at a quaint little restaurant tucked away in a charming alley. The ambiance was romantic, with soft candlelight and gentle music playing in the background. You shared intimate conversations over delicious food, savoring each moment together.

As the night drew to a close, Daniel whispered sweet nothings in your ear, expressing his love and gratitude for having you in his life. And as you looked into his eyes, you knew that you had found your peace, your happiness, your everything in him.

Who'da known, who'da known you would save my life?

Who'da known, who'da known you would fly my kite?

Could you tell, could you tell?

Could you tell?

☆ end a/n﹕school is sickening fr

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notes, comments, reblogs, feedback and follows are greatly appriciated!

!!PLEASE DO NOT REPOST ON OTHER WEBISTES/APPS OR COPY MY ORIGINAL WORK!!

[angryborzois]

YOOOO

it has been a long time since I’ve hopped in the ask box but unfortunately it will be the last time for a bit since I’m prepping for my exams. Luckily it ends on the 9th of March so I will probably make my presence known by then. In the meantime, I’ve learnt how to queue properly and now have a bunch a stuff that can be posted in the wild so let’s enjoy that

Enough of that, today is Valentine’s Day and while my aroace ass won’t be doing anything, I hope you are receiving the highest quality chocolate there is and fun times with your friends.

Thanks to your posts about Alice in Borderland I actually watched the show and it is REALLY GOOD. My favourite is Ann and Arisu though Kuina, Chishiya and Usagi are quite close. Im almost finished with 2 episodes left so when I come back I’ll probably chat more about it.

guess what. Finally named my oc after the many jokes. Their name is Tadaomi and I’ve been really invested his story as a consequence of the jjk brainrot I’m going through. Made a whole doc for them and everything. Maybe I’ll send it to you when It’s done ( do you have the tumblr dms open maybe I’ll drop it there).

thats’s pretty much everything i got here so I must depart. Here is a collection of all the cat photos I have rn. Hope you get plenty of water and sleep and see you on the 9th💫

AKAVABSHD YO HI

GOOD LUCK ON UR EXAMS U GOT THISS and ill be eagerly waiting till march 9

(also u gotta teach me how to queue things properly becuase last time I tried it didn't work...yes im a dumbfuck)

anyways thank youu, i prob wont be like receiving things because im not popular lol but like you said ill have fun with my friends as best i can <3

OMGOMG YOU ACTUALLY WATCHED ALICE IN BORDERLAND (not me being giddy and grinning nonstop at this) and in case it wasn't obvious enough kuina and chishiya are my top favs (kuina is such a girlboss i love her sm)

I DIDNT THINK YOU WOULD WATCH IT SO IM LIKE SUPER HAPPY AA

I've been dreaming about Borderland too much lately lol (im just too lazy to post them); sadly I haven't seen Kuina there but I have briefly seen Chishiya (honestly it's just Arisu and his og trio that I've interacted with). I gotta rewatch season one though because I actually don't remember anything from it and I get so confused when I see mentions of Season 1 because my brain goes "woah when did that happen".

But I only really remembered and started posting about AIB because of that one anon from Jojo's posts who talked about who Nijiro was (i gotta thank them cause they really got me into that chishiya brainrot and helped me get out of that damn geto brainrot)

actually ok maybe i lied because A SMALL PART OF ME STILL LOVES THAT DAMN MF GETO ARGHDGFHD I HATE HIM. (Speaking of that I never finished that animation of Gojo's Past Arc I was working on...)

ANYWAYS.

YES i'd love to see your oc's entire lore i have my tumblr dms open so 🤲🤲🤲 dont be shy drop the link 👀

Aww ok I'll be waiting until March 9 and in the meantime I'll be brainrotting endlessly for Geto ahem I mean Chishiya because Chishiya is just better. Make sure you get plenty of water and rest too bro (I'll make sure to get water but I prob wont be getting enough sleep lmao)

ANYWAYS SEE U SOONN 👋

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you mrs. used to be a party goer lefty eyebag 😅

Well, make sure you don't pull it out or you'll get twice as much gray hair! Besides, if you look good now with your hair color, you'll probably look good when you get more gray.

I was just teasing about you not spoiling anything 😅 I like that you gave us readers a chance to explore the possibilities of what could've happened to Yelena. Same with the Natasha and R portions where you just skipped over the months, leaving it to our imagination and making it sort of free for all to think how they want to.

I kind of feel bad when I do that though, cause it was your story to tell and then me imagining different scenarios for the characters makes me feel like I'm cheating on the author's thought process... does that make sense? Lol

My favorite part with the whole fic is finding out R's past. It gave insight on how they became what they are now. And I like that in stories, cause if that wasn't in the story, I'd keep wondering the whys. I also enjoyed the detail when R was showing Natasha how to get rid of the body.

So with your husband, did you guys stay together for a bit before getting married?

Hey now, I could have asked for more songs but then you'd be writing all night and might have to make 2 to 3 days to post the response...like your stories..hahaha just kidding 🤣 but 600 songs is not that much to be honest.. how many genres of music do you like?

Wild old times huh 😏sounds like a crazy fun summer. But you never got into the pool at all? And you didn't mingle with any pretty girls back then? Cause you know, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas anyways lol

Hm, I'd have to do a rain check on my list. Summer for me was always about bbq on the grill and working lol

Okay next, top 3 songs that was your favorite from your childhood.

-CuriousGeorge

Hello hello old head who cant stay up late righty eyebag!😅

Sorry i fell asleep last night..(the irony after i call u old head who cant stay up late 😅🤣)

How r u today? Whats ur plan for today? I woke up with worse allergy than yesterday..i cant wait to get rid of that tree, i swear.. 😅🤣 i got headache all day yesterday n today i feel shitty.

Haha yeah i hv been pulling those greay hairs n it keeps grow back n i found more. Some of them even look like a silver-ish color of grey so i looks a little shinny when the light hits it.😅😅

Aw thank youuu.. i hope so too but burgundy red n grey r total different color though, so it could have a total oposite look.😁

Yeah sometimes i like to do that, leaving some space or part for people to imagine the possibilities (not pasta-bilities though 🤣)

Yeah i got what u meant with feeling bad about imagining other different possibilites that u have in mind.

Ohhh so u told me the good dark possibility that happen to yelena last night, so it means u hv cheated on my thought's process about the story??🤨 how could u!! I cant believe u do that! *soap opera dramatic scene* 🤣🤣🤣 just kidding just kidding.

Haha true, u can ask for more songs but u only asked 3 but u know what? Im gonna rebel a bit n i will give u another more of the songs that reminds me of summer (on the next answer because i need time to find it.😅)

Also it's not fair, u didnt tell me 3 songs that remind u of summer.. so give me the answer! 😅😆

I like any genres my ears found it good n enjoyable.. except the heavy metal or underground or other type of screaming rock type of genre. It drives me crazy. What about u? Have i asked u what kind of music u like?

Yep it was a pretty fun summer in Vegas. N nope, i didnt go in to the pool besides i think it's gross, i wasnt wearing swimsuit or bikini (dear god, no. 😅). I was wearing short tank top n a thin oversized shirt to kinda cover my body a bit, flipflop n a baseball cap 😅 n i was happy enough to stay at the bar have my drinks n enjoy the view of women 🤭 (in respectful way of course)

I didnt mingle with the pretty women because i was with my friends but i remember a few women smiled at me. But i'm pretty oblivious n i dont know how to flirt or if i flirt. one of my friends, he sometimes noticed n one time he said "how come everytime we r at the club, girls hit on u?"

I was like "what? They did? I dont know" 😅🤣

Well, i made out with a girl in the corner of the club there once.. but not too long because my friends were looking for me n kept calling me. 😅 what happened in Vegas, stayed in Vegas. Lol

3 songs that reminds me of my childhood, like when i was a kid? Or teenagers? Or how young? Haha. I didnt really remember my childhood to be honest. U gotta be more specific on this.😆😅

Next question?

Cheerio! (Not the cereal one)

[worminstuff]

Maybe all of their reactions to one of their student's having an anxiety attack possibly because they're falling behind on work and panicking or their class gets too loud. I was wondering as well if i could be Cloud Anon? (If you do name Anons that is)

|| I don’t think I can do all of them because that was genuinely take so long, (the short blurb one was almost 4K words) so I’m gonna do a few, I hope that’s okay. And I do do name anons but it’s been a really long time since anons sent anons like that, but I do! I don’t remember all of the ones there are but, ill try to make a post or something ||

Mr.Blade, Mr.wastaken, and Mr.Jacbobs helping student!reader with panic attacks!

Warnings: panic attacks, anxiety

Word count: I dunno

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Mr.Wastaken

Mr.Wastaken sits in his class for about an hour after school ends so if anyone needs extra help they can come sit with him and he’ll do homework with them. Even when it’s not math work too.

Today he was sitting with y/n, one of his students in his third period class.

The cringe worthy noise of Mr.Wastakens chair sliding towards the desk y/n was at made them close their eyes.

“I know ,I’m sorry, should’ve just picked it up and moved it.” He offered them a smile, expecting the sweet smile that y/n usually would return but they didn’t smile.

Dream paused. That’s strange. He thought, but he didn’t bring it up.

“So we’re working on some quiz corrections right?” He asked, they nodded, “easy peasy, no big deal. Which ones gave you trouble?”

Y/n explained their trouble with certain ones, their voice quiet and shaky. Y/n hadn’t looked him in the eyes yet, which he noticed. Their eyes were trained on the paper.

Dream started to explain one of the problems they pointed out, drawing a little explaination beside it. He quickly stopped when he heard a small sniffle.

He looked back up at y/n seeing they paced a arm over their eyes. His brows furrowed, he quickly became worried.

“Hey, hey,” he placed a gentle hand on their shoulder, “what’s going on?” He figured it probably wasn’t just the math on the desk in front of them.

Y/n sniffled again before replying, “I just- there’s so much work due and I can’t bring myself to do it cause there’s so- so much and and” their voice was shaky as y/n pulled their arm from their face. Under their eyes were wet, stained from the smooshed tears.

“Oh kiddo..I get that. How about I exempt this grade, actually I’ll just put it at a 100 since we’re moving on to a new unit, and we work on something else maybe?” He offered another smile, this one more comforting. “And we can go steal some snacks from Mr.Dudes room too.”

Y/n nodded, “thank you.” Their voice was still soft but less sad. Dreams heart melted.

“Dont sweat it kiddo, and if it gets like this again, please let me know. I don’t mind hanging out with you after school so we can do this whenever you need. I’ve got your back, kid.”

Dream hated seeing his kiddos upset, he would always do anything for them.

^^^^^^

Mr.Blade

There was a new student in Mr.Blades class. they were new to the whole school too but Mr.Minecraft put Mr.Blade as their home room teacher.

The reason Mr.Minecraft did so, unknowing to Mr.Blade was because this student was super anxious being new, and he thought techno would deal with this well.

Mr.Blade didnt usually have a home room class, it was usually his free period. So this ment y/n and him were alone each morning.

This freaked y/n out because obviously she didn’t know him, and he came off as very...scary.

Mr.Blade didnt realize they found him scary until about a week in to them being in his class.

He noticed multiple things. y/n never looked him in the eyes, they never asked for anything, and they were always jittery. This particular morning, it seemed ten times worse.

“Are you okay there?” he tried to soften his tone, he really didn’t want them to be afraid of him.

Y/n only nodded, but their eyes screwed tight for a moment before looking back to their computer. They’d been staring at it for a while now, silently shaking and ringing their hands.

Mr.Blade was well aware of the wordless lie so he stood from his desk and made his way over. He squatted down and placed his arms on the edge of their desk, resting his head on them.

He waited a moment, thinking they’d close the computer. They didn’t.

slowly, he placed his hand on it and slowly closed it. He waited a bit longer, letting y/n calm down a tad by themself before he said anything.

“What’s going on, kid?” he tried to look into y/n’s eyes but they were closed. “Can you look at me? I’m not angry, i’m not gonna yell or anything.”

Y/n opened their eyes slowly but surely, and Technos hesrt just about shattered.

He didn’t often get soft over his students but the pools of tears in y/ns eyes made even his cold heart ache.

He waited a moment, giving them a moment to breathe and see he wasn’t a threat or anything.

“Stressed.” Y/n said, voice barely above a whisper.

“Yeah? How come? What’s stressing you out?”

Y/n explained how much they didn’t like being new and having to be caught up in classes was really stressing them out.

Mr.Blade quickly understood, and sympathized.

He helped y/n make a little planner, and even drew little drawings on it to make it more fun. Once they had a planner, both made a plan together so the work load didn’t seem so much.

Afterwords he even called some of y/ns teachers to see if they could accommodate in any way. He even offered to teach the materials to them in their free period, as long as y/n didn’t have to turn them in as assignments or anything.

They agreed of course.

^^^^^^^

Mr.Jacobs

Mr. Jacobs classes were often hectic. That was sorta his nature and the students just followed in his footsteps.

Usually it wasn’t a problem because karl was able to keep it from getting too out of hand, but today everyone seemed a bit to energized to want to listen.

They were working on a map project so they were working and talking with friends and just being sort of wild.

Karl noticed quickly, one of his students y/n, was getting a bit overwhelmed by it.

“Hey, hi, hey, what’s going on?” He stood so his back was facing most of the class, and y/n was in front of him.

Y/n was shaky, and looked visibly nervous.

“S’ just a bit loud.” Y/n said, offering a small smile. y/n was internally screaming. Thought they were good at hiding it, they were moments from snapping and curling into a ball hoping for some quiet so the feeling of impending doom would end.

Karl nodded, he read her like a book and instantly understood.

“Can i give you a hug, kiddo?” He asked, his head tilted in parental like worry. Y/n nodded and he leaned down to give her a quick hug before standing back up to go back to the front of the class.

He gave her two thumbs up. Then whistled loudly, getting everyone’s attention.

“Quiet game! Whoever wins gets forty five dollars. That’s right. Forty buckeroos. “

The class was instantly silent. Y/n’s shoulders relaxed, and she shot karl a thankful smile. He ruturned one similar.

[kirencer]

Pomegranate Honey | Chapter Three

ranunculus asiaticus

Word count: 2.6k

Relationship: Sugar daddy! Spencer Reid x GN!AFAB! Reader

Warnings: Mentions of choking (Cat and a sexual fantasy as well), kissing, mild grinding, they make out like horny teens for like 3 seconds and then another 4, Mention/Mild depiction of a scar (not too detailed), A lip bit of self deprecation from Spencer’s end, Sexual humor. [LMK if you feel I have ever missed anything. It’s been quite a while since i first read these chapters] THIS SERIES IS ENTIRELY NSFW, 18+ ONLY PLEASE

A/N: Hi hi!! welcome back to kiram posting everyday till all of the chapters are posted!! this is 3 of 14, and we’re slowly building up speed my loves!! <3

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[series masterlist]

[previous chapter] [next chapter]

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Spencer sat in his car and picked up the phone. He was only a consultant on cases during his sabbaticals, so he had no need to physically be on cases.

“Hello, Emily,” he said into the phone, already just a bit annoyed more so at himself, than at the person calling him. Spencer had just pinned Y/N to the door. Then, while doing so, he thought about moving his hand from their cheek to loosely wrap around their throat. He wasn’t getting better. Sure, he didn’t want his actions to cause bodily harm and he would never do something like that without consent, but he told his therapist that he didn’t want to hurt anyone.

He’d admitted to choking Cat and how much he’d hated himself for it. He hadn’t however admitted that he wanted to choke someone in bed. Spencer had spent a lot of time researching things like that for his job; some of them had made him feel weirder than others.

Later, Spencer realized that the weirdness he felt was because he was attracted to the ideas and words. Some of the things he researched would pop up porn, he would watch and enjoy it. Things would lead to other things and he would find himself learning how to safely tie up partners as well as how to safely choke others. Just research, was what he would tell himself. Then again, that was what he told himself this time too.

The conversation was quick and he gave his insights. Afterwards, he went home and collapsed onto his bed.

There he stared at the ceiling; he wasn’t looking, though. Again his mind was thinking about Y/N. The kiss had pressed his body close to theirs and so his mind was focusing on that. Remembering how their legs felt around his thigh - oh no.

He was only just now realizing that he’d done that. On a first date. Y/N didn’t seem like they had minded though.

He glanced at his phone and picked it up. Awaiting him was a message.

Y/N: i had fun today

Y/N: i didnt treat you like i would a sugar daddy tho. my bad

Spencer smiled, forgetting his woes and already typing a reply. okay

S.R: I didn’t think so. How did you treat me, then?

Y/N: the way that i might treat someone on any other date

S.R: Is that something you would be interested in, another ‘‘normal’ date?

Spencer set his phone down as he changed his clothes; he didn’t bother with a shower, it was already too late. It buzzed on his nightstand with a notification.

Y/N: hm... is being a sugar daddy something you would be interested in?

He knew the answer but paused anyway, to take a deep breath and think rationally.

Spencer had the funds. He’d already admitted to himself that he wanted to lavish Y/N with gifts and things, so why was he so nervous to admit the truth? If he did say yes, what would it mean?

Would the two of them… be together? Or would they just go on dates and kiss with just the Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby label? Would they even kiss? Did Y/N only let him kiss them because they wanted it to be a more normal date?

Questions raced through his mind, but he couldn't find an answer to them. The only way he could get answers would be through his phone. With another deep breath to calm his nerves, Spencer answered.

S.R: Yes. More than you might think, actually.

Y/N: good :)

Y/N: we’ll talk about this more tmrw. sweet dreams, spencer

The air he'd unconsciously had been holding was released in a relieved huff. He smiled down at his phone.

S.R: Sweet dreams, Y/N

ណ

He often found himself enjoying teaching more than someone might think. Sure, Spencer enjoyed the field and hands-on saving lives, but in a way he was almost passing on the torch and burden he had held for so long. Essentially, the people he taught would more-or less be the next strong profilers or agents. Spencer was making a difference, even during his mandatory relaxation periods.

That didn’t mean that he wouldn’t still itch for more than helping over the phone, of course. Luckily, Spencer had heard that their cases were not too bad and for the most part found himself letting teaching become important to him. Helping his students with questions, watching all of their eyes light up at all the information - yes, it was often morbid or about sadism, but the point stood.

Currently, Spencer was more than excited to wrap up his presentation and assign readings. Y/N’s message still rang throughout his brain as he rushed to grab his files to shove them into his bag. During that time, a few students wandered into his office to ask him questions. Of course, he wouldn’t be rude, he politely answered their questions before excusing himself.

As fast as he could, Spencer made his way to the cafe down the street from the university he taught at. He caught the open door and made his way in. His eyes scanned the room before falling onto Y/N. They sat in the corner with their back to the wall, sipped on a coffee and moved the stylus in the hand onto the screen in their lap. If Spencer could see better, he’d have known what they were drawing. Yet, as Spencer walked up, Y/N closed the case to the iPad.

“Hello.”

Y/N grinned back at him and waved for Spencer to sit down across from them.

“Hi. Sorry I didn't get you a coffee, I don’t know your preferences or if it would be cold or hot by the time you got here.”

“It’s fine!” Spencer assured with a soft smile and tight brows. “I’ll go grab myself a coffee, maybe we can walk in the park across the street, after?”

Y/n nodded. “I can stand with you, I was just sitting to wait, anyway.”

Y/N slid their iPad into a backpack and started walking ahead of Spencer. He followed, then stopped in front of the counter, lightly drumming his fingers on the edge. The barista walked up and Spencer quickly gave her his coffee order.

“How’s your day going?” Y/N inquired. Spencer half shrugged, not noticing how the barista twirled her hair around a finger while tapping his order into the register.

“Everyone has been very observant and have written down their notes, for the most part. I also had a good night's sleep, so it’s all good…” Spencer trailed off, not wanting to say too much.

Y/N hummed and Spencer quickly pulled out his wallet to swipe his credit card through the machine; he’d forgotten to grab paper money that morning. The barista tried to command his attention, but Spencer was too focused on Y/N.

“You miss your job, huh?”

Spencer nodded and quickly grabbed his to-go cup off of the counter, smiling a quick thank you at the barista, who only scoffed and went to take other orders. When they made it to the park, Spencer smiled at the fact that Y/N had to actively think about how fast they were walking to keep in pace with him. It was funny because he was already slowing down for them; his legs were much longer than theirs, after all.

“I like my time away, I do, but I also sometimes want to see them. They are my family.”

Spencer sighed and sat down at a park bench, taking a moment to watch the subtle changes in Y/N’s expression. Any profiling that came from it was unintentional. He was merely admiring them, really. Yes, he noticed that they were slightly concerned for him, but he was really paying attention to the sparkle in their eyes that commanded him to spill everything. It wasn’t a glint of mischief; it was a star. Bright, beautiful and pulling him like a planet was pulled to the star at the center of it’s solar system. A delicate balance that he was more than happy to comply with.

“Hm. I think you need something to take your mind off of work. FBI and teaching.”

Without his acknowledgement, Spencer’s hand reached out to clasp Y/N’s. “What did you have in mind?”

Y/n smiled and used his hand to pull him up. “Cmon, follow me.”

He did, despite his mind screaming at him that he was a FBI agent and knew better to follow someone into the woods. The park relented to trees and soon Spencer and Y/N were in the middle of nowhere, luckily Spencer memorized the directions they walked just in case.

“Are you trying to take me somewhere and kill me?” Spencer asked with a slight smirk. Y/N punched his arm lightly.

“You wish!” Y/N chuckled. “We’re almost there, I promise.”

Four minutes later, the trees disappeared and they were left in a clearing. A stream cut a line through the space near the opposite edge. Y/N breathed a sigh of relief and jogged into the middle to spin.

“Do you hear that?” they joyfully expressed.

“No,” he whispered, just loud enough for Y/N to hear. Spencer walked into the clearing, his fingers skimmed the longer patches of weeds and the occasional bunch of flowers. Y/N sat down in a flattened part of the grass, where it seemed that they had sat there many times. Spencer stood awkwardly. “Am I supposed to hear something?”

“No,” they echoed with a grin while patting for Spencer to sit down next to him. With a deep breath he sat down, his mind fully aware of the dirt now clinging to his pants.

“It’s the silence,” Y/N declared at last. Their voice was a murmur and Spencer watched as they looked towards the sky with admiration. He had never wanted to kiss someone so badly.

Y/N’s eyes moved from the clouds to glance at Spencer and his heart stopped. When it restarted he was already pressing a deep kiss to Y/N’s lips. His hand was moving to wrap around Y/N and bring them closer. He burned red hot and only cooled by touching them.

Spencer pulled them onto his lap and moved his hands to their hips. Y/N moaned into the kiss and Spencer broke away to then dive back again. One of his hands slipped under their shirt to press against their bare skin. His palm touched something that felt almost like scar tissue, so he moved his hand to a different place, not wanting to make Y/N uncomfortable.

Y/N hummed against his lips and pulled away, “I think that’s the best kiss I’ve ever had.”

Spencer clicked his tongue and couldn’t stop the self deprecating joke that flitted through his lips, “I feel bad for the people you’ve kissed.”

Y/N rolled their eyes and moved so that they were sitting fully on his lap. Spencer was so grateful that just kissing didn’t make him hard anymore like it did years ago, that would have been embarrassing. “Seriously. You’re a really good kisser.”

He smiled a sincere ‘thank you’ and looked towards the sky before sipping on his now cold coffee. They sat like that for twenty minutes. In that time, not once did Spencer think about anything other than Y/N’s hand in his and his lips on their lips.

Y/N suddenly jumped up and told Spencer to, again, follow them. Spencer found himself standing right by the stream; its bubbling water was a few inches from his feet. It wasn’t deep and from what Spencer could see there weren’t any animals in it. No crawdaddy's - crawfish - or the normal small fish. Hopefully that meant no leeches, especially since Y/N was now walking into the water and urging him to follow.

Spencer rolled his eyes, took off his first shoe, balancing quickly to take off his sock and winced as his toes connected with the mud.

Y/N, being impatient, pulled him by hand into the water. Oddly enough, Spencer didn’t mind it too much. The water was cool, but not too cold and relaxed him. Yes, he was still hesitant to walk to where the water reached his mid calf, but did it anyway. Spencer realized that if Y/N asked, he’d follow them into lava with only mild worry.

“Hey, Spencer?” Y/N asked, he was already looking at them.

“Yes?”

“Give me your other hand, okay?” Spencer nodded and handed it to them. The light in their eye changed for a second to glint at him before he found himself falling into the water. He made an exacerbated sound before pulling Y/N down on top of him.

“That wasn’t very nice!” he called out as Y/N laughed. “Now we’re all wet!”

Spencer glared at Y/N without any heat. Y/N rolled their eyes, “You’re having fun though right?”

Spencer acknowledged as an idea rolled into his head. With a smirk, he flipped them. Y/N gasped as the water hit their back.

“Hey, hey! That’s cold!” Y/N didn’t seem to be too mad at it, though. In fact, they seemed to enjoy that Spencer was hovering above them. Their pupils were blown wide, swallowing the sparkle into the depths. Spencer slowly leaned forward to press a kiss against their lips. His forearms were covered with water from the fall and supporting Y/N so that they didn’t fall fully into the water, but he didn’t care.

Spencer groaned into the kiss as Y/N experimentally tugged on his hair. His clothes were soaked, sopping, even, they didn’t bother him, though. What bothered him was the noise that slipped between Y/N’s teeth as they ground their hips up into Spencer’s. Y/N pulled him away by his hair and Spencer had to fight back a whine.

With a sigh Y/N moved from under him and to the spot they set their bags. They picked theirs up and said, “We should walk back to the park so that I can get home. It’s my night to cook.”

Spencer moved to his feet too and followed them into the dry land. “You have a roommate?”

“I have three roomates. It’s like New Girl in that loft.”

“Is that a movie?”

“Oh sweet little Spencer, I know what our next date is: Netflix… maybe, if you want, there can be some ‘chilling.’” Y/N pointedly looked away from him.

“I do not know what that last part means. Watching something sounds nice, though. I don’t have Netflix, though, so it’d be at your place.”

“Obviously. I have a popcorn maker, anyway.”

Spencer rolled his eyes and stepped into the park. He realized that they were about to part and smiled sweetly. “I’ll text you.”

“You better!” Y/N responded, moving closer and raising their hand to guide Spencer down to kiss them. Spencer pulled away after a few moments to place two quick pecks on their lips. “I’ll see you, Spencer.”

“Yeah,” he mumbled and walked away backwards, dripping water from his hair into the pavement and earning a loud laugh from Y/N as he almost tripped over his feet.

Y/N and Spencer had yet to talk about anything: if they were a couple, etc. Nevertheless, it was fine, Spencer was currently okay with kissing without a label. He didn't know how long he would be okay with that, though.

Tomorrow, he told himself, I will ask them the dreaded question tomorrow.

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[mogai-sunflowers]

Can i rant/whatever the not angry but sad version of a rant is? Feel free to delete or post it, i dont mind either way.

Ive been really really working on my ocs for skyrim and their families/partners/kids and thier jobs and stories all day today and sparsely over the past 4 months. Just today i finally started to get their appearances down and i was super excited to show my gf. She however just kind of.... Played it off and said shes tired and won't remember the names even if i re-explained the main story( which would of only tooken like 5 maybe 10 minutes at most, i have an ocs backstory for a different fandom that litterally took 2 hours to explain. 5-10 mins for 3 ocs is nothing in comparison to my usual detail and nuance.) I know she worked her usual 7 hours today and im thankful she dose to help keep us afloat because thats very important and some skyrim ocs story isnt important but.... Idk.... Hearing her basically turn down a small hyperfixation rant just to turn away from me and play games on her phone without even so much as a " sorry".... That just really really really hurt..... Like a lot more than i can voice. ( i cant help but wonder if this is some kind of revenge cause i worked on an encanto animation yesterday and didnt give her as much attention as usual...)

I know she dosent hate me and she has every right to be tired and put her spoons first but idk... She's never completely dismissed my interests like this and i feel like ive been stabbed in the chest.... Showing my art and my stories is something really personal, exciting and inspiring for me and she knows that. I really love watching people get fascinated in my work and the detail so for her, one of the last(if not, thee last) people i really rely on for that confidence boost to just.... Dismiss me... It really really hurts. I waited all day to show her it and she just dose not seem to care.

Im sorry to throw this at you, i know its kinda insignificant in the grand scheme of things but i just needed to let it out to someone cause my only other friends might tell her about how this hurt me and then it'll just be this whole thing I'd rathur just... Not.

Its nothing to break up over but it still hurt. Im gonna go cry for alittle bit... Thank you for reading this. I know skyrim isnt one of your interests( that and itll be awhile before i feel like sharing my stuff again because of this.)but it helps me alittle to reach out. Rejection sensitivity be damned. Ill be ok so dont worry or anything. Thank you.

- one of your muturals lol but the front is foggy so ehsnsmsm idk who to sign off as

okay gosh i totally get how you feel!!! not to make this about me but i do relate, many times my parents have completely dismissed my hyperfixations and it's made me feel so insecure for having said hyperfixations. they're really important and rsd really sucks when it comes to not having your hyperfixations listened to or cared about.

so like, yeah. your gf had worked a lot that day. but clearly, she had the energy to turn around and play video games, so even if she didn't have social energy right then and there, it still would've been better if she'd simply told you that she wasn't up for socializing at the moment but that she did care and want to listen. and if she just didn't care, then that's on her. yes, she's not wrong for putting her spoons first but that doesn't mean you're wrong for being hurt by how she reacted.

i hope you feel better soon! and i know it can be hard to talk about your hyperfixations after getting dismissed, but you can 100% always talk to me about them, i'd love to hear and i think it's so cool that you enjoy making your skyrim ocs! hope you feel better soon anon!

[weeb-writor]

Do you still love me?

Hello lovelies! Today I am back with a angst piece but a happy ending don't fret too much! I was really thinking about making it end horribly or leaving it up to the readers imagination but I decided nahh i couldn't do that to my heart. So here Bakugou and his s/o who fell out of love??(or did they??) when then have a large family in the mix. I have also decided im kind of obsessed with domestic pieces lol, they are like more than half of all my posts. Anywho, reader is neutral hope you guys enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bakugou Katsuki x Reader

You and Bakugou call its quits not thinking of what it would do to your 5 kids who are stuck in the middle

Words:  3606

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“Are we going to dad’s today?” Hiroyuki asked softly.

“Yeah, your going to spend the weekend with him, all of you.” You smiled at him.

“Can I bring Tokki?” He said looking at the ground already knowing your answer.

“We went over this last time baby, Daddy can't have pets at his new place and Tokki is a cat, he likes staying at home.” You said with a sigh. It really sucks that it came down to this, spend a week with you then a weekend with dad, then rinse repeat. Sometimes you even wondered if it was better. That’s what you and Bakugou told each other, I mean what else can you do when you fall out of love? You approached your car where all of your other children were waiting. You and Hiroyuki sat down and signaled the diver to go.

“We going to daddy’s right?” Kohana said as she bounced around in her seat. You booped her nose and nodded at her.

“Yay, daddy’s home!” Yoko said, clapping.

“Don't get excited Yoko, Dad’s probably busy. Were probably gonna be with Grandpa and Grandma.” Hiroyuki said playing with your fingers.

“You're so dramatic Yuki! Of course dad is busy! He is a Hero but he always makes time for us.” Your oldest said little explosion going off around her.

“Kaori.” You warned her with a stern voice. The little sparks calmed and she went back to quietly gazing out the window. 

“Your dad is a hero and therefore busy but I know he is very excited to see you all and will spend all the time he has with you.” You smiled at them. They all smiled back before going back into relative silence. When you and Bakugou decided to have a big family you were ecstatic and so was he. This, however, wasn't what you imagined. A tiny rift right threw your family and it was growing bigger everyday. When you told the kids about the spilt they didnt say much and the youngest ones didnt even really understand but as they lived through it, they changed. They formed their own opinions about who’s fault it is and why it happened. And now they were splitting up, there was Kaori the eldest who didn't care too much, Yoko, and Kohana. At the opposite end was Hiroyuki, just him. Your fragile little boy who was so sure it was his dad’s fault. Saiyuri was too young to choose a side but all the change wasn't really helping the 11th month old baby.

“We have arrived.” The diver announced. You thanked him while getting everyone out of the seats and exiting the car. Bakugou lived in an apartment now at the tippy top of course. It was a long and loud elevator ride as your kids were antsy to see their dad. When it opened Bakugou was standing there waiting for them and was immediately met with an armful of girls.

“Daddy! I missed you so much!” Kohana said almost in tears.

“Misses Daddy.” Yoko echoed her sister.

“Yeah, I missed all you brats too, you better have been on your best behavior! You have to keep up the Bakugou reputation.” He teased them

“Of course we have! I'm still number one in my quirk development classes. Yuki has the best grades in all of his grade. Kohana is reading at a 3rd grade level already and Yoko and Saiyuri are everyone's favorite at the Daycare!” Kaori said with vigor.

“Yeah, your all Bakugou’s for sure.” He chuckled at them. He turned to talk to Hiroyuki but he was gone. You heard a door shut, he was probably already in his room.

“I've got homework to do dad and them we should do something all together!” Kaori said kissing his check before taking off. Her sisters followed her as usual.

“How long do you think he’ll be like that?” Bakugou asked you with a sigh.

“Honestly I don't know, it's not like I tell him awful things about you. Maybe it would have been better if we did cause then he would have one thing to be angry about, one event, It would be easier than him just being angry at you.” You said placing Saiyuri onto the ground to walk around.

“They’re so mature and smart I forget they’re so young. Hell we don't understand why it happened, you can't just pinpoint a time where you fell outta love, it’s gradual. So how can we expect them too.” Bakugou said, sounding in pain.

“Yeah, sucks they had to witness it. I’ve got to go meet up with someone but just… He thinks you’re going to call your parents and abandon them to do Hero work. I know you can't put off everything but I think he just wants to know that for once he can come first to you.” You said as you kissed Saiyoui’s forehead. You were about to enter the elevator when a weight crashed into you. You didn't have to look down too far to see Hiroyuki hugging you.

“Take care of Tokki, please.”

“Yes and you make sure you and your sisters behave for your dad.” He sighed but nodded at you. You gave him one last hair ruffle before leaving. You couldn't help but think this wasn't ever gonna get any easier. You sighed before heading to the next destination, a café to meet with a few of your friends.

“Y/N!” You heard a voice call to you as soon as you opened the door. You identified the voice as Mina.

“Mina! Long time no see!” You said giving her a hug.

“Y/n, dear come sit down.” Momo said smiling at you, you sat down with the group.

“How are you doing.” Mina asked you cautiously

“I’m surprisingly doing awful, I see Bakugou too much to truly get over him. The kids are still adjusting to us being apart and Hiroyuki has been really upset and distant. I thought breaking up would fix a lot but it just made everything worse.” You sighed out.

“Well of course it did!!!” Urakara whisper yelled.

“You and Bakugou called it quits way too soon! I've never seen someone handle Bakugou the way you do. I’ve never seen anyone love him like you. Hell Bakugou loves you so much it’s ridiculous! Do you remember when he was gonna put his hero work on hold because of Kaori! I’m sorry y/n but I’m not buying this fell out of love thing.” Deku rushed out.

“Mm I’d have to agree. If there is anything I’ve learned from being friends with Bakugou it’s that he never half ass anything and if he put time into it he’s gonna see it through till the end so, logically it doesn’t make sense.” Todoroki said quietly.

“Yeah so what’s your side of the story?” Mina asked carefully.

“I… loved him, you know and when we had kids it only intensified but now it’s different. Bakugou is a great dad don’t get me wrong but he’s absent and that was fine when it was just me, Kaori, Hiroyuki, and Kohana but now there is Yoko and Saiyuri. It’s hard when they all have different school times and different needs cause of their ages. It’s hard because I had to put part of my life on hold, I went to UA too and I was supposed to be one of the greatest support people out there, every agency would want me. But it was Bakugou’s dream first so I sacrificed it all in a heartbeat. Over the years he just got more busy and I got more left behind. I’m tired of waiting up till 3am to make sure he’s alright knowing I have to be up at 7 to get the kids ready for school. I… love him and I don’t want to argue with him and I could feel myself growing angry at him, feel myself growing resentful. So I brought it up under the disguise of “do you still love me” and he said No… so that was that and we were done the next week.” You said not meeting their eyes. They just looked at you with wide eyes.

“Y/n I’m sorry, I didn’t know you felt like this.” Momo said softly.

“It’s fine, he is the love of my life and our kids are my everything so I would do it all again, just for them.” You smiled with a few tears cascading down your face.

“You haven’t tried to talk to him about this, you still love him, you guys can fix this.” Deku said almost mumbling.

“But he doesn’t love me and so there is nothing to talk about. Now come on let’s talk about something else. You can hear sob stories like mine anytime.” You waved them off. They were hesitant but the conversation did pick up about their lives and your time at UA, at least the happy parts. The rest of your two days without your kids were a blur. You just remember waking up with your phone going off a Monday.

“Hello is this Bakugou Y/n?” A women’s said. The title hurt just a bit.

“Yes it is.” You responded drowsily.

“I am very sorry you have to receive a call like this but your son Bakugou Hiroyuki has been rushed to the hospital, his sister did refuse to leave his side so she is there as well.” You were silent before hanging up and immediately calling Bakugou.

“What’s up?” He rushed out. He sounded panicked so he must have gotten a call too.

“I need you to pick up Yoko and Saiyuri.” You said rushing to put in on your clothes.

“What? But yuki is in the hospital, we’ve got to be there.” He said 

“Yes but they are done with daycare in.” You paused to look at the clock on your way out the door. “A hour. If we don’t get them now we’ll have to leave him to get them.” You said finally in your car.

“Yeah and he would rather be with you than me…” he trailed off.

“I didn’t say that.” You rushed out

“You didn’t need to, I'll get them and be there as soon as I can.” He said hanging up. You sighed and continued your drive to the hospital. When you got there you rushed to the room where you looked in and saw your son unconscious and Kaori laying next to him.

“So he is going to be okay, we do want him to remain here for another day or two.” The doctor said to you, smiling.

“Okay but what’s wrong with him.” 

“Well he hasn’t been eating or drinking or sleeping enough, especially for a boy experiencing his growth spurt. Pair that with how much he has been using his quirk in class and you have a pretty bad situation.” She said as if it was nothing to worry about.

“Uhhh okay so we just need to make sure he is eating and drinking right?” You said pacing a little.

“Yeah and I would figure out what made him stop. Your daughter was very adamant about it not being abuse just that there was something going on at home and he is trying to deal with it.” The doctor said as you froze thinking you did this to him.

“Just a divorce…” you trailed off.

“Yeah that will do it but I don’t need to know about it. It's your business just make sure to talk to him so you don’t end up back here.” She said before leaving, you let out a few tears before heading into the room. Noticing you, Kaori got up and was hugging you tighter than she ever had.

“Did you know he wasn’t taking care of himself?” You asked, stroking her hair. She shook her head no.

“I didn’t either, I didn’t know it was hitting him so hard… you know you can ask me about anything, tell me anything… me and your dad will always be in your corner.” You said lifting her chin so you gazed into her eyes.

“But you're both not in our corner anymore. You guys are in to different corners and it’s hard to keep up with two different houses and two different.. well everything’s.” She said looking away from you.

“I never meant to you guys to feel like this, I just…” You trailed off but before you could finish Hiroyuki tossed and turned in his bed.

“Yuki sweetie, can you hear me?” You said as you rushed to his side.

“Mmm.” He said, he’s eyes still shut in pain.

“Oh baby, i'm so sorry I didn't notice you were in pain. It’s never gonna happen again, okay? Do you need something?” You said stroking his hair, he hummed before falling back to sleep. You sighed and kissed his forehead.

“So whats up with him?” Bakugou rushed into the room with the girls in his arms.

“He hasn’t been eating, or drinking, or sleeping. So when he used his quirk it drained his body and he’s here for 1 or 2 more days.” You said eyes never leaving his.

“That's impossible, he was just with me… he… didn't eat very much.” He trailed off. You hummed at him understanding how he was felling as you missed the signs too.

“Hey, girls I texted Grandma and Grandpa and they said they miss you so much. So while we take care of Yuki how about you guys go see them, yeah? Mr. Yuri is waiting to take you.” You smiled at them. You see a fire rise in Kaori but it goes out quick as Bakugou ruffles her hair.

“Okay then, be good for them and don't cause too much trouble. Mr. Yuri will pick up Kohana, Kaori please explain what's happening to her. And don't worry, we’ll see you real soon.” You said waving the girls out of the room. When they were out of sight you and Bakugou visually deflated. 

“Katsuki, how does this keep happening?” You asked him

“What?”

“How do things keep getting worse, first the break up, then the kids being mad at each other, Yuki’s anger at you, and now this.” You cried out.

“The break up was bad to you?” He asked voice cracking.

“Why wouldn't it be, Katsuki I know you don't love me anymore but I…” You trailed off

“Would you just spit it out dumbass! This is why we didn't work out because you never say shit. You just bottle it up and never lean on me or depend on me the way I do to you. You used to say “we're a team” all the time but in the last 2 years you haven't said it once. It was you who fell out of love with me so don't pretend like it was so hard for you.” He yelled at you.

“This is why we don't talk Katsuki, all you wanna do is yell and project all the feelings you bottle up from working so goddamn much. Of course it was hard on me and you would know why if you could drop your ego and talk to me like you can tolerate being around me or love me!” You yelled back at him but before the argument could turn into a big screaming match your sons voice rang out.

“Would you two just stop it…” He said weakly.

“Yuki, im sorry we shouldn't have been yelling even if you were asleep.” Bakugou said caressing his check. At the touch Hiroyuki let out the tears he’s been holding in.

“Its us isn't it?” He paused to look at you. “Me and my sisters… You had Kaori and me pretty young and you didn't really get to be young. You had all of us before you really got to live together just the two of you.. And Uncle Izuku and Auntie Urakara's relationship is doing fine even though they started to date around the same time as you, difference is they just started having kids like 4 years ago… Im 12 and Kaori is 13. So its us isnt?…” He said curling into himself.

“Kid, I'm not gonna lie to you, having you and Kaori at the ages we did was a nightmare. We were barely out of school, we lived with my parents for a while cause we didn't have jobs or a place of our own and even we did get one it was a shitty hole in the wall place but even at the young age of 19 we pulled our shit together and made it work so when you came a year later we were a lot more prepared. Yes we did miss out on a lot of things people our age did but we had you and Kaori and that was so much better than party’s and hangovers. Then we decided to have Kohana, Yoko, and Saiyuri and you all make us so happy. You all have nothing, not a damn thing to do with what's going on between me and y/n. If we ever made you feel like you did we didn't mean to. We love you so much and I am so sorry if we ever made it seem like it was your fault.” Bakugou said, eyes boring into Hiroyuki’s. Hiroyuki looked at you and you nodded to show you agreed with Bakugou.

“Don't ever forget how much we love you, okay? Now you should eat, we’ll get you anything you want.” You said wiping your tears with a smile.

“If it's not too much trouble, I want you and dad’s spicy pork curry and you guys should take some to the girls.” He said drowsily.

“But in order to make that we both would have to leave since it's a meal we make together… we couldn't leave you here alone.” You said mostly to yourself before any could say anything else a new voice was heard entering the room.

“You guys go talk and make him some food, ill stay with him. I didn't watch you guys terribly flirt and kiss everywhere just for it to end over some miscommunications.” Aizawa said as he took the seat next to Hiroyuki. Aizawa had remained close with a lot of students from 1A, becoming like a second dad but he had been extra close with you and Bakugou. When Kaori came into the equation he was like a nanny to her and it only increased when Hiroyuki was born, the two having a really strong bond so neither you or Bakugou was shocked he showed up.

“Okay, then old man. Watch my kid.” Bakugou said, grabbing your hand and pulling you away. You almost forgot what his calloused hand felt like. He drug you to his car and the car ride was mostly silent. The talking began when you began to cook in the house you used to share.

“Do you love me?” You asked as you cut pork

“Yes, I love you. I never stopped, I am in love with you y/n. Today I love you more than yesterday but less than tomorrow.” He said slicing onions.

“Then why did you say that, say that you didn't love me.”

“Because I could see it, you don't look at me the same. We don't talk the way we used to. I don't want to string you along and make you hate being with me, because I love you more than life itself. And I was scared that one day you would wake up and you wouldn't need me and realize how easy it would be to leave me. That it would be my fault we ended because I was so focused on me I didn't see your pain. Scared that I would wake up and gaze into your eyes and find no love or joy in them. So I decided to let you go… I was thinking we just needed a break but you suggested a divorce and I agreed because I would do anything to make sure you keep that beautiful smile of yours. Even if you weren't smiling at me anymore… do you..” He said calmly, growing more emotional with each word.

“Yea, I never ever stopped. I was just tired, I am tired. But I want nothing more than for us to work… we can get through this, can't we?” You asked cautiously.

“Of course we can, we are Bakugous, we can do whatever the hell we want. And it will be different this time, we’ll talk about things and communicate better, I swear. I aint seeing a shrink though.” He said flicking water at you to make his last point more effective.

“Yes we are.” You giggled at him.

“No we aren't, you shitty dumbass. We don't need help, I can talk about my feelings without some dumb wanna be life coach.” He yelled as he began to wash the rice.

“Well we don't have to but I guess that means Zuku and Urakara have a better relationship than us since they go to counseling…” you trailed off with a shrug.

“Oh fuck you!” He roared at you, you giggled knowing he would now go. This was the most normal you felt in months, the happiest for sure. Just maybe things would be okay, and who were you kidding you could never fall out of love with the spiky haired explosion boy no matter what he did. It was toxic in a way but you could unpack that in the therapy sessions you were gonna force him to attend.

[rein-ette]

Are you still working on your Commonwealth study? Do you have any thoughts on Arthur's relationships with his colonies apart from Canzuk + US?

Not properly, unfortunately with exams and then work I haven’t had mental/emotional capacity to do real research (and probably won’t for a while 😔). But I have continued to think about and develop certain relationships, and I think I also have old hcs I’ve never shared, so I’ll put those down!

Born into the Empire

Australia

@oumaheroes has already done such great hcs on him idk what I can add, but basically he was a little bit of a rowdy child, always breaking windows and shattering fancy pots, never able to sit still. I think rainbow once mentioned that Ken (short for Kenneth, my name for Aus) was a lot like England as a child in his curiosity and energy, and I wholeheartedly agree. But I think Arthur’s intensity was more inwardly directed, pushing him to pursue and master new talents and learn whatever he could, while Australia is a little more carefree in his love for the outdoors, exploring, jumping around and off things, little wild animals. Unfortunately for him, he was born in a period of the empire when Arthur was very serious about his kids education, and therefore often praised those who studied hard and learned fast, which really just wasn’t Australia’s cup of tea. Australia took this kinda hard and thought he was the “dumb” one in the family that Arthur was always scolding, but in reality Arthur knew and appreciated that Australias interests lay elsewhere — he was just a frustrated, tired, parent who really wanted to give his kids the best while also holding his empire together, two goals that were never going to fit well in the end and would completely exhaust him.

As Australia’s grown older he’s realized a bit of this (not entirely, though) and also that 1) he really did break a lot expensive things and cause general mayhem 2) scolding us Arthur’s way of showing he cares, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have payed attention to him at all 3) despite being a penal colony, he was still one of Arthur’s more “legitimate” children (being white and a boy) and was therefore still incredibly privileged — never having to question, for example, why it was that Arthur was his dad, if it should be this way, or if he had a seat at the family table at all (more on this later).

New Zealand

Zee, from birth, was a clear favourite. Obedient, calm, quietly intelligent, he would also later develop a blistering sense of humour which combined with his appearance made it overwhelmingly clear who’s child he was. If Ken questioned his place in the family because of his poor academic record and others did because of their appearance/race/other complications, Kaelan never had such problems; his siblings called him the “prince.” Zee, however, also had a charm that, like Matthew, endeared him to his siblings and mostly protected him from jealousy, though he certainly still had issues with being called a try hard, daddy’s boy, bossy, arrogant. Certainly as a child Zee was a little prideful and, under that unperturbed demeanour, willful, but he grew out of it by the 20th century and became one of those most trusted by Arthur, second only to Matthew. He’s also always been inseparable from his brother Australia despite their differences, and today they both have one of the healthiest and most amicable relationships with Arthur of any nation, let alone former colonies (family road trips, every summer).

Bermuda

I absolute fell in love with this girl after reading about here, once, in this fic by @shachaai, and after that my mind just ran away with me. For me, her human name given to her by Arthur just has to be Ariel — for the little mermaid reference, yes, symbolizing her connection to the sea and stunning good looks, but also because:

1. Ariel is a biblical name, meaning lion of God. This makes sense to me, because Bermuda began as a Portuguese trade post, so Arthur definitely consulted our resident bad catholic Port before naming her.

2. Ariel used to be boys name. This also makes sense, because I hc Bermuda was and still is a tomboy. Bitch is fierce, takes no prisoners, and has zero filter. Her letters to Arthur, which all the colonies sent so Arthur could keep an eye on things, were full of shit like “I swear to god if the Spanish don’t get out of my waters I might eat one of them,” and “father, I asked you for destroyers two months ago, and yet you sent them to Hong Kong — could you explain this most unusual occurrence, surely it’s not that you forgot”, and “thank you for the harpoon on my birthday, I caught a small shark a couple days ago and have sent you some of its teeth for your collection.” Arthur tolerates this attitude because he’s weak when it comes to girls; he absolutely spoils his daughters (and flushes like a 16 year old when a woman so much as bats her eyelashes at him). Yes, p*ssywhipped Arthur is a hill I will die on.

3. It also suits her because? Ariel? Shakespeare? The Tempest? Bermuda Triangle? Shipwrecks? Daughter-like figure of powerful and vengeful sorcerer? Yeah. And this girl is a fire spirit — she is so lively, snarky, clever. As she’s grown older she’s mellowed out a little, but still: a no shit taken, no fucks given type of gal.

4. Speaking of growing up, she’s also become quite the beauty. Shacha, if I’m remembering correctly, described her as dark skinned, wavy-haired, and green eyed and that image has been burned onto the back of my eyelids ever since. Those Iberian genetics really be pulling through for her, that’s for sure. Engport love child if I’ve ever seen one. Definitely one of the prettiest in her family.

Singapore

I’ve already mentioned this to needcake, but I’m not too big a fan of canon Singapore, so this is my oc version. Singapore is fascinating to me because it had only a very small local population before it became a colony (The original settlement had actually been destroyed by the Portuguese about two centuries before the British started building a port there.) So nation-tans like Singapore and Bermuda really are Arthur’s children in the most direct sense of the word. And yet, Singapore is mostly ethnically Chinese, with Malays being the second largest group. Growing up Asian in a white, Victorian era family surely cannot have been easy and more than once Singapore probably wondered if there hadn’t been some mistake. To make up for the constant fear that he wasn’t “really” British, Singapore studied ferociously and had a truly terrifying work ethic. I’m not sure if this is common knowledge outside Asian circles, so I’ll mention that this hc comes from the fact Singapore is well known for having truly exceptional students and some of the most prestigious schools. Singaporeans score highly in literally everything and they have an advantage with good English learning environments, a highly desirable trait in Asia, but these results come from brutally long hours — and its really saying something that they’re known for working hard, considering the studying ethic of students in Korea, Japan, and China aint nothing to sneeze at, either. To me this actually fits really well with Singapore’s upbringing in Arthur’s household, because Arthur himself prizes intelligence and hard work above all else, being a workaholic himself.

As for their relationship, it was probably the best when Singapore was young and peaked in the 1930s with the massive naval base the British built at Singapore, at the time the largest dry dock in the world. Singapore was a well-behaved child, not necessarily introverted but not rowdy either, and all the way into his teenage years he truly admired Arthur and was proud to be a part of the British Empire, despite his lingering unease and insecurities. The British defeat in World War II, however, was a massive turning point. He had worked his ass off to be a good son, a good brother, to contribute to the only family and system he had ever known, and he had thought by the 30s he was finally on his way to becoming a fine adult. And suddenly, the British surrender brings his entire world crashing down. He had followed the rules faithfully thinking it was his destiny, but suddenly it was clear that all rules were made up. Of course, his insecurities exploded. If the empire was a ruse, what the hell was he? A part of the illusion? He couldn’t have a truly Asian identity, because many of the old East Asian nations shunned him for his Western upbringing, and he could not entirely understand their values either. So he was a kid who kinda had to figure out late and very very suddenly who the fuck he was and wanted to be.

And, well, he’s done pretty well for himself, hasn’t he. After having a total crisis and questioning everything, I think Singapore slowly started to realize that just because the British Empire as a political entity didn’t last forever, that didn’t mean that his entire childhood and identity weren’t real. The love he gave to his siblings and the love he got back, the hard work he put in, his bond with Arthur and the safe, happy childhood he had — those memories and feelings didnt have to be diminished by what came after. Essentially, he learned the lesson all nations have to learn, which is that one needs to be able to discern between duties as a nation and feelings as a human being, and to some extent keep them separate to protect both.

Whoooooo ok I’ll stop there because this turned into a dissertation, sorry. Let me know if there are any specifics u want me to elaborate on or anything I missed, but I’ll leave this here for today :)

[andromedasstarship]

in the stars - chapter 4

photo credit - @ssa-emilyhotchner​

pairing - aaron hotchner x reader 

warnings - canon typical criminal minds, stalking, angst. pretty tame chapter 

summary - “I’m on a date.” You responded flatly. The other end of the line went silent.

a/n - hi besties. so this chapter is p short compared to the last one, i had like  7k something chapter 4 and it just didnt feel right, BUT that means chapter 5 is basically done i just need to edit it soooooooooooo hopefully wont take a long time lol! enjoy, heart yall forever 

masterlist // series masterlist // read it on ao3 

chapter 3 / chapter 5 

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The rest of the team was left in various levels of shock. Everyone was struggling to process the bomb of information that had just been revealed. With hindsight, it was easy to connect the strange levels of tension and intimacy that radiated between you and Hotch. What was more difficult to swallow, was the new understanding that Hotch had been keeping this secret for nearly five years. Random ‘trips’ that Hotch would take out of state or the subtle sprinkles of wealth showing up in the form of gifts suddenly made sense. 

This was completely uncharted territory for the entire team. Given Hotch’s history, it wasn’t too difficult to understand how protective he may be of any relationships post-Haley; but the magnitude of your relationship- both in terms of your status as well as length-, and the withholding of information even on the case was a different form of betrayal that couldn’t be kicked under the rug. 

Hotch had always been one of the fiercest advocates for unity, truth and an equal playing field when it came to information concerning a case,- Morgan was still feeling second hand embarrassment for Jordan- for him to be the one to hold back such influential info was difficult to fully wrap their heads around. Anger, of course, was felt and there would certainly be time for that anger- not even getting started on the amount of questions everyone was bound to have-, but as the team was silently processing, they all reached similar conclusions. Hotch was displaying a softness and side of him they hadn’t seen in a very long time and they wouldn’t let their valid frustrations get in the way of solving this case. 

Morgan was the first to speak, pulling his phone out of his pocket. “I need to text Garcia about this.” He said, shaking the phone a bit. Everyone managed to laugh at that, all certain that Garcia would have the most interesting reaction to the news.  

“You know…, the other day when she was giving me a tour of her house, I pointed out a bottle of Dalmore 25 she had on the wall. She got really weird about it and I thought she was trying to play modest, but this, this makes a lot more sense.” JJ remarked lightheartedly. 

“So now we know Hotch has some game then, huh?” Morgan quipped, a large grin on his face. When everyone just stared blankly back at him, even more confused than they already were he continued. “Do you all not remember when he ‘magically’ got a bottle of Dalmore 45, those start at twelve grand” 

Reid was about to open his mouth and add to the conversation, but just as the words were leaving his mouth Hotch stormed back into the conference room. One hand was tightly balled in a fist while the other was gripping his phone. 

“She’s not answering her phone. Three times, it went straight to voicemail.” 

“She isn’t on set today, when she left this morning she told me she had work related errands to run.” Emily recounted, racking her brain for any more info about your whereabouts. 

Hotch strode over to an open laptop at the edge of the table, quickly hitting a series of buttons until a very flustered Garcia appeared on screen; her mouth dropping open when she saw Hotch. 

“Questions later Garcia,” Hotch opened, already anticipating that someone Derek would have informed her of the latest news, “I need you to track Y/N. I want her current and last location.” 

“Yes sir! I uh, I will do that right now for you.” Garcia responded, clearly doing her best to hold back the hoard of questions and comments she had. The sound of her vigorously typing filled the room. “Alright sir, so the bad news is that it looks like her phone is currently turned off, but! The last place it pinged at was outside of Chateau Marmont about three hours ago. Which for those of you who don’t know this place is notorious for being the A-lister hideaway-” 

“Garcia, do a wide search for her name and location for today’s date. Check to see if there’s been any media sightings on her whereabouts.” Hotch ordered. He hadn’t forgotten how uneasy it had made him once he found out how easy it was to locate you. Paparazzi were a different form of ruthless and he’d never realized how difficult it actually was for people in the spotlight until he met you. 

“Let me see…, yes sir you are right! I’m getting a bunch of hits of her entering the-” Garcia’s sentence falling off with an ‘oh’. 

“Garcia, what’d you find?” 

A headline popped up on the screen. 

“Emma Co-Stars Pictured Together Out At Lunch: Has The Love Moved Past The Screen?” 

Underneath, multiple photos of you quickly loaded. There you were, cheerily standing next to your co-star, looking up at him with a big grin on your face. The photos showed the two of you in different positions as you made your way inside. A few of him as he opened the car door for you. One of you with your arm wrapped loosely around his while you walked up the door. One of you ducking under his arm as you entered the restaurant. 

The tension in the room was palpable as everyone did their own mini attempt at profiling the photo. It was difficult, you’d clearly proven to be a great actress and they knew you were capable of manipulating your outward emotions. It was even more difficult considering it was just a handful of mediocre quality photos. 

Hotch was tightly gripping the edge of the table, forcing himself to keep a level head. He knew it was unreasonable to get angry over the idea of you with another man, but it didn’t help the pang in his heart as he recognized the genuine signs of happiness you were emitting. 

“JJ,” Hotch said, voice dangerously calm, “call the restaurant and have them discreetly tell Y/N that ‘Andi’ is calling her.” Discretion was the highest priority for him, the envelope being even further confirmation that the unsub was closely trailing you. The last thing he wanted to do was either trigger a violent reaction or cause him to go underground.

Back when the two of you had been together, out of an abundance of caution, you used to refer to Aaron as ‘Andi’ in public. You hated not being able to thank him in speeches or mention him in any capacity, so this had been your best way around it. 

“Yes sir.” JJ responded, quickly moving out of the room to make the phone call. 

“Garcia, do you have any leads on the kid that dropped off the envelope?” Hotch asked. 

“No sir. The car he left in was reported stolen a few days ago with no leads as to where it went. Camera feeds loose the car about three blocks away and his face was too obstructed to get any hits that way.” 

“Alright, once JJ comes back with confirmation Y/N’s gotten the message, I’m going to pick her up. I want the rest of you to work with Garcia and categorize these photos. Cross reference whatever you can to get a timeline.” Hotch ordered, the rest of the team not being to be told twice. 

-----

“Where the hell are you?” Aaron demanded. 

Even through the phone, you could tell he was absolutely seething. It was bad, by the time you had picked up the phone you’d amassed a total of twenty texts and nearly ten missed calls from Aaron; not even mentioning the individual missed calls you had from each member of the team. It was bad, but in your defense it had been less than an hour from the first missed call to your current response. 

What could you say? You were big on not being on your phone when you were spending time with friends. 

“What do you mean, where the hell am I,” you answered, rolling your eyes as you leaned up against one of the private bathroom countertops. “How did you describe it before Agent? I’m very in ‘demand’.”

You could hear him groan through the phone and wondered if he was running his hands over his face; something he used to always do when you were being difficult; he absolutely was. 

“Y/N-” 

“I’m on a date.” You responded flatly. The other end of the line went silent. As you were debating whether or not you should add the part about it being a publicity date, Aaron’s voice came through. 

“End it. I’m picking you up. The drive there from the station shouldn’t be more than 30 minutes.” Aaron said, his voice dangerously even. 

“I’m perfectly capable of getting back to the station on my own Agent. I don’t need you stirring up an absolute scene-”

“Y/N,” he started, voice commanding in a way that told you he was serious, “a package was delivered to the station today. Filled with hundreds of photos of you over the years,” he paused again and you could hear him take a deep breath before continuing, “there’s photos of us in there. The unsub knows.” 

You went silent, mouth opening over and over, unable to find anything to say. You had always envisioned a world where you and Aaron were some sort of ‘public’ knowledge, but never like this, obviously never like this. 

“Y/N, I need to come get you,” Hotch said, his voice much softer now, “I can’t-, I need to see that you’re safe.” 

“I’ll make something up,” You said quickly, before adding, “there’s a private valet area, I’ll send you the instructions to get past the gates and I’ll let the security know you’re coming to pick me up.” 

“I’ll be there in ten minutes, don’t draw any attention to yourself.” And with that he hung up, leaving you stunned in the bathroom. You gripped the edges of the counter, staring at yourself in the mirror. You wished you could stay in the bathroom for hours, desperately needing some time to privately process what Aaron had told you. 

That wasn’t in the cards for you though, so you quickly did some pointless attempts at ‘straightening’ your appearance- more for your benefit than anything else- before you turned the lock and left back for your table 

You slipped back into your seat across from your friend and co-star Johnny. 

“Your friend alright?” Johnny asked. 

“Yeah, yeah,” you said with a small smile, “she’s fine. But my Agent called me when I was in there, she apparently managed to set up some last minute FBI consult to help me prep for an audition I have coming up. According to her, she ‘pulled a lot of strings for this’.” You said, rolling your eyes. The lie sliding out of your mouth with ease. “Whoever this FBI dude is, is supposed to come pick me up right about,” you looked down at your phone, “now apparently. So I guess our little date has to end early.” You said, giving him an exaggerated sad pout. 

Johnny rolled his eyes at that, giving you a small laugh. The two of you were both equally uninterested, romantically, in each other. But you did get along quite well, so being ‘forced’ into hanging out with each other outside of filming wasn’t bad; you’d probably hang out outside of filming anyway 

“No worries, we still on for running lines later tonight?” He asked. 

You thought for a moment, before nodding. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world. Now, help me flag down the waiter, I want to get one last drink in before I go.” 

-----

About twenty minutes later you found yourself waiting out in the private courtyard of the restaurant. You were doing your best to calm your nerves, this being the first opportunity you had to try and process what Aaron had told you. You should’ve seen it coming, if the stalker was so obsessed with you, he must’ve noticed Aaron in your life at some point. But you had been so careful. 

Then the other obvious thing hit you. His team knew. You were wondering how the team had taken the news when you saw the black SUV come into view. Aaron quickly stopped the car in front of you and before you could move to open the passenger door yourself, he was out of his seat in a flash, coming over to where you were standing. 

For a moment you were both silent. You felt tiny under his unrelenting gaze, his eyes scanning your entire being as he ensured himself you were okay. 

Without thinking, you launched yourself at him, wrapping your arms tightly around his waist, ensnaring his arms tight to his side. As soon you realized what you did, you were internally kicking yourself, moving to loosen your arms nearly as fast as you had put them there.

“Aaron I-” 

Before you could finish your attempted apology, Aaron had pulled his arms from under yours and repositioned them around you, pulling you tightly against him. Your head naturally fit perfectly under his and you took in a deep breath, letting his scent surround you. It was cliche, but you both were thinking about how perfectly your bodies melded against each other.  

You felt his hand rest gently on the back of your head, gently stroking down your hair in a steady rhythm. “I got you.” He whispered, so quiet you nearly didn’t hear it. 

You pulled your head back so you could look up at him. “I’m scared.” You said, admitting it aloud for the first time.  

Aaron was staring hard down at you, his face soft. “I know,” he started, moving a piece of hair away from your face, “I’m not going to let anyone hurt you, okay?” 

You nodded at that, missing his warmth when he started to pull away from you. He kept a protective hand on your lower back, guiding you towards the passenger seat. He opened the door and helped you in, gently shutting the door behind you. As soon as your door was shut he wasted no time in getting in the driver's seat, starting the car up again. With a quick check to make sure your seatbelt clicked was in, Aaron peeled out of the parking lot. 

A few floors above the courtyard, in one of the private hotel rooms, a curtain was angrily thrown shut. 

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taglist - @mac99martin @iwaizumiee @kylorendrip @hqtchner @lieswithoutfairytales @ssahoodrathotchner @midsummernightdream @weasleylovers @evans-dejong @itsmytimetoodream @yoshigguk @28cnn @cuddlyklaus @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @yallgotkik @sunflowersandotherthings @averyhotchner @kimmy-k-k @uwu-sebastianstan

a/n- if youve asked to be on the taglist and dont see urself, please send another message! im really bad about putting people on my tag document lol, even if ive like responded in tumblr!!

no permission is given to copy or republish my writing on any other platform or account. if you see this story outside of my blog or my ao3 it is stolen work. i do not own nor claim to own criminal minds or any of the character involved in it.

[wizkiddx]

worst case scenario part 3

umm so, never ever intended it to be this long but here we are. again this is v dark so please please read the warning!! also [and obvs] this is very medically inaccurate and just a work of my head aha

[part 1] [part 2]

warning: mentions of death / hospital / mentions of childhood abandonment too- please don't read if this could affect you <3

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His heart was thundering in his chest, so much so it drowned out all other sounds making all the doctors words fade into the background. Conciously, he really was trying to listen to what the doctor was saying; consciously he knew she was trying to prepare him to see Y/n; consciously he knew she knew he wasn’t okay. But really? It didn’t matter, and as they drew closer to his fiancé Tom felt an urgent sense of relief purely know she was there. She was there and she wasn’t dead…yet. 

Only two people were allowed to go up, just because the nature of the ward - everything was meticulously controlled, including the comings and goings of visitors. If you’ve never been in an ICU it’s a pretty hard environment to describe. Really, it’s just another hospital ward, with capacity of about 20 beds. Each bed has much more equipment surrounding that the average and a nurse is stationed per patient, monitoring every possible variable that the machienes are measuring, so any trend (either positive or negative) can be identified at the earliest point. Though in everyones head, it seems as though ICU is a common place ending up for some unfortunate sod when something bad happens, it’s actually really rare for someone to be so ill and dependant on medicine to maintain normal body functioning. Only the most severe trauma, infection of the most dangerous microorganism, surgery of such high stakes normally make an appearance on the ward. And ,on average, between 8-20% patients that are admitted to an ICU never make it out. 

And those grim figures were unignorable to anyone. As soon as you walk through the doors, the atmosphere is intense and ineffable. It’s not spoken, but is so incredibly morbid it makes anyone shiver. 

Dom felt this, squeezing his sons shoulder as he followed Tom and the doctor, just a pace or so behind them. Having offered to go with Tom, whilst Harrison took Nikki to see the baby, Dom was now feeling just as clueless as his son did. Except he was actually listening to what the doctor was trying to warn them about and it scared him. The three, made it to the door and with a swipe of her ID card the doctor admitted the Holland men in. Gratefully, none of the staff took any notice of who was walking in, they were much too busy for that - Dom was incredibly relieved, had someone recognised Tom when he was in this state, god knows what would’ve happened.

The doctors pace was with purpose, perhaps so that the two couldn’t spend too long ogling the other patients in the beds - who all looked almost unhuman with the amount of tubes and wires coming out and into them. But then, she slowed up, halting infront of a bay about 5 or 6 down the ward. Spinning on her heel and with a subtle nod to momentarily release the nurse from her post at Y/n’s bedside, to give them a bit of privacy, she looked at the two men. 

“You can touch her, just be gentle with the wires.”

Shellshocked and terrified, Tom was frozen those 2 metres away from the bed barely able to see her face over all the equipment. Yet undoubtedly, it was his finance’s delicate visage lying on the white pillow, with a thick white mouthpiece and tube covering her mouth and stuffed into her nose. Not able to move, both Dom and Dr Goodwell sensitively waited - it was an adjustment to say the least, seeing someone you knew so well look so different. With quiet tears starting to roll down his eyes, Tom eventually started to inch toward the bedside, taking his time to try and absorb everything of this frankly ridiculous situation. He couldn’t get over how, even considering it all, above her nose it just looked like Y/n. Like she was asleep in their bed, eyes closed as if she had once again  fallen asleep infront of a random Netflix movie Tom had bugged her enough to watch in bed. And it was, ever so slightly comforting. That was still her, that was still the love of his life lying there. And she was still alive - which given the last few hours, was enough. 

Reaching the bedside, Tom naturally reached out and stroked the top of her head delicately, pulling into place a few rogue strands that seemed to have a mind of their own - she had always hated when her hair got frizzy. The picture had Tom’s mind casting back to their first holiday, a serene if quick few days in Fiji-  though Y/n didnt know this , that holiday had been one of the most important times in their relationship for Tom. Until then, given the nature of his job, the couple had only ever managed brief periods together. They spent time together as and when they could in between Tom’s busy schedule but it was never as long as they’d like. Somehow though, he’d managed to squeeze a few days away to surprise Y/n with the trip. 

It was everything he’d ever hoped it would be and more. In fact it was then Tom was oh so sure he would be spending the rest of his life with her. This thought crossed his mind on the last morning, when he had for once woken up before Y/n - her head mere cms away from his on the pillow. Just like now, her hair had been all over the place and her sparkling green eyes locked shut. Contrastingly though, in Fiji the sight had made him smile softly; now it just made him cry again. 

“Would you like a minute alone Mr Holland? We will just wait outside?” Not even turning round to properly respond to the doctor, Tom just nodded violently, not taking his eyes off his fiancé - waiting till he heard his Dad and the doctor leave the bay; then the curtains be completely drawn to a close, before he shakily cleared his throat to whisper.

“Hey darling… you um-you’ve scared me shitless today… and… and I’m supposed to be the dramatic one in the relationship.” Chuckling wetly, Tom clasped his other hand in Y/n’s - still mindful of the IV port coming out of the top of her wrist. Not that he was expecting any sort of response, yet the lack of her squeezing his hand back still had his heart sink. “Look I…I love you so bloody much and I really need you to get better okay? You’ve never listened to me before but I really am begging you to now, I just.” Swallowing thickly, he shut his eyes momentarily and delicately rested his forehead on hers - his touch feather light. Just needing to feel her. “I just really need you and I really love you., okay?” 

Unsurprisingly he didn’t get a response. The rhetorical question hung in the air alone, safe the mechanical whir of the ventilator and various chimes of the machines and monitor, till his Dad came in. Grasping and squeezing his shoulder lightly, Dom provided the stimulus for his son to unfold from over the bed, standing upright, as both men just took in the sight of Y/n lying there for a minute or two. 

“I need her Dad. I-I-“

“I know Tom.” Speaking so quietly it was barely audible, Dom’s eventual agreement at what Tom was saying was in a way a relief. Haz and his mum had both either been saying or implying that they would be okay no matter what - which came from a good place but was so infuriating. Because god forbid, if this situation got worse Tom knew it wouldn’t be okay. Nothing would ever be okay again. So his Dad’s simple acknowledgment meant a lot, causing Tom to turn round and embrace his slightly shorter father. 

Dr Goodwell silently watched the exchange for a short while and once the men eventually pulled away she stepped forward to give some more information. She went through what all the biggest and scary looking tubes and wires were doing for Y/n, before explaining the next steps. 

“Now as I said before we are sedating her at the moment, while we wait and see if she gets any complications from the surgery that are better treated while she is asleep. By this afternoon we will have a clearer idea and by that point we may choose to withdraw that sedation. It’s important that you are aware though that she might not wakeup immediately. Sometimes some people that have suffered similarly to your fiancé will be unconscious for a while in what I’d presume you’ve heard of as a ‘coma’. Now it’s not as dramatic as you see on TV shows, it’s just Ms Y/l/n’s brain giving her body a chance to recover. It’s often a longer process, which I know is something you don’t want to hear, but I have to be honest.” The doctor was stern but in a softer and from-a-caring-place. “These patients are suggested to possibly recover quicker if they have a steady support network behind them, which it seems like she does. That means that you need to look after yourself so you can help her sir, especially in what could be a long process. It’s not going to be helpful for Yn if you’re killing yourself trying to be here all the time… It seems like Y/n already has quite a big group of you here for her, so please remember you’ve got all of her care team here and everyone else to help you too….Does that make sense sir?”

“Tom” His Dad, in a gentle but firm warning tone, urged Tom to speak and to listen. Properly listen. 

“Yeh… I-yeh It’s just all a lot right now.”

“Of course… and we promise that if anything changes with her condition, you will be phoned straight away. You are welcome to stay as long as you want - the only rules are two at a time, no flowers, sign in and out and then sanitise your hands pretty excessively. If you need anything, Ms Y/l/n’s nurse will be your first port of call.”

“Thanks for everything” Dom nodded in a gracious manner, which the doctor seemed to massively appreciate - apparently, for the job they do not receiving a hell of a lot of thanks. 

“I’ll pop back in a little bit.”

And for a couple of hours everything everything felt like a bit of an anticlimax, nothing happened, not a lot changed. Just Tom and Dom sat next to Y/n’s bed in silence; Harrison and Nikki downstairs with the baby, till Dom got a phone call from Nikki asking them to meet at the neonatal unit  - which was limited by visitor numbers unlike the ICU. Thinking it’d be simple, the elder man gained Tom’s attention with a call of his name, explaining they should go down to meet up. 

“I’m not going down there.”

“Son, I know you’re worried by Y/n isnt going anywhere right now. The doctors said they’d call you if anything happens.”

“It’s not-“ Tom stopped himself, biting his tongue and looking away from his Dad. “I just don’t want to go down there.” Slowly, Dom was more and more realising Tom’s thought process and honestly… it scared him. In the hopes this was just a big misunderstanding he offered a different option - hoping Tom would equally refuse that. Dom suggested going down to the cafe instead, which most unfortunately Tom agreed to. It wasn’t leaving Y/n that was the issue, it was being near the baby. 

Tom’s daughter. Unnamed and apparently abondoned by both parents. 

Anyhow, Dom resigned to playing into Tom’s choice, perhaps Nikki and Harrison would be able to swing him round, to see sense. It still took Tom getting the nurse to triple check they had his correct number on record , just in case, before Dom could tear him away from the bed. Fortunately the pair found a quiet and secluded corner table, where Tom was still yet to be recognised, while Nikki and Haz found them too. 

What followed was Tom answering all his mum and Harrison’s questions about Y/n’s condition, in a blunt and emotionless manner - without Tom returning fire by asking any questions at all about his beautiful little baby girl. Eventually Nikki braved it, someone had to bring it up. 

“Well it sounds like littles going to change for a while… maybe you should head home for a bit? You’ve been up half the night and you look shattered love. You don’t have to go back to yours… you could stay in your old room for a bit?” Tom being by himself at the moment sounded like the most incredibly stupid idea ever, Nikki was offering it as a choice - when in reality there was only one option.

“Maybe later this evening I will? Just don’t want to leave her alone yet.”

“It’s already 7 love, you’ve not eaten all day, you got to look after yourself too.” Harrison and Dom sat awkwardly while Nikki tried to delicately encourage Tom into what was the only sensible plan, watching him nurse the small hot choclate in both his palms. Time really had lost all meaning at this point, for him it felt both years since he’d first arrived with Y/n and at the same time barely 10 minutes ago. It felt weird. 

“We can take shifts? If-if you want someone with her I mean… I don’t mind staying for a bit longer if it means you head back to your parents.” Harrison really truly didnt mind, in fact he sort of wanted to. He wanted to see Y/n’s face definitely alive, wanted to feel reassured by the monitors. Shockingly, Tom slowly nodded his head, surprising everyone with his lack of argument. None of them could work out whether it was a good thing him not putting up much arguement ; either he was heeding everyones advice of taking care of himself - or he had just given up. Harrison, as much as he didn’t want to, was favouring the latter. 

“Okay” Nikki declared optimistically “So maybe you and Harrison go up so you can say good night to Y/n, then we can all go and pick up the baby?” She opened the plan to the floor, allowing for input but got nothing - except maybe Tom’s jaw unconsciously tensing uncomfortable at the latter part of her statement. Dom noticed. 

Not one noticed but knew what it meant. His son blamed his granddaughter. His son, right now in that moment, hated the unnamed and totally helpless baby girl. 

part 4?