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#and hope it will go away :'))) but also now im scared of exercising bc what if im doing it wrong and damage my body?!? 😭
bunnihearted ¡ 3 months
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🍰🥛
#i've been so good not complaining about this... so im gonna do it now :3#early this week during my walk... a point in my shoulder / collarbone / neck started hurting so bad#it was at that level where your saliva production increases and you start feelings slightly nauseous#idk if it was bc it was so painful OR if the pain is at a point that puts pressure on certain nerves#and during the week i've felt it on and off but at a much lowe intensity#but this morning i woke up at 6am and couldnt fall asleep bc it hurt too much 🥴#i've googled sm but i just cant figure out at all what it could be... this doesnt fit any description#it isnt focused in my shoulder joint bc i can move my arm in all directions and degrees and it doesnt make it worse#anyway i read and read but i cant figure out at all what it is and that annoys me bc now idk what to do T-T#it could maybeeeee be that im so fkn tense and always have muscle tension in my neck throat and shoulders#it is possible that it now hit a specific pressure point and now i have a pinched nerve type of situation where my muscles are tensed up#or it is bc i could have done certain exercises wrong at the gym#im always so anxious and cautious abt exercising wrong but i still cant ever be sure if i do it correctly :(((#i might have used one of the machines for shoulders/biceps/back incorrectly#like maybe the seat has been too high or low :/// and now i've strained smth???#it made me so sad tho bc when i was at the gym this week i skipped all upperbody exercises bc im too scared 😔#i want it to pass bc like it actually hurts in such a weird and uncomfortable way like it makes me wanna puke and it comes in waves#but nothing makes it better like not heat not painkillers not stretches ... so im just not doing too much#and hope it will go away :'))) but also now im scared of exercising bc what if im doing it wrong and damage my body?!? 😭#i hate my body bc i have so many random unexplainable pains and it is so annoying >.<#ok now i've complained so i feel better ^-^
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quillyfied ¡ 1 year
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Things I’m noticing on this rewatch, which I’m hoping to take slow and ponder on but we will see how it goes, PART SIX (obviously major Good Omens season 2 spoilers throughout, specifically for S2E6)
- thunder is happening outside where I am right now, so let’s buckle in!!
- Still such a good silhouette for Miranda Richardson.
- BATTERY OPERATED CANDLES
- “Will you answer a simple question?” “If I hear one, of course.” THIS EXCHANGE. SO GOOD.
- “It all looks so simple in Jane Austen.” Because other people’s love lives always seem more simple, angel. Especially fictional ones.
- JANE AUSTEN THE BANK ROBBER
- okay. Did Crowley just know that about Muriel? He doesn’t even know their name, how can he tell what rank Angel they are? More sensing and how Crowley is uncannily good at it??
- BEES. BEEEEES. REMEMBER THIS.
- “I had brothers” PREACH
- IM DONE WITH BEING SCARED
- SHES BRAVER THAN ANYONE I KNOW
- MAGGIE AND NINA ARE EVERYTHING
- MAGGIE NO TOO MUCH BRAVERY
- I fully missed the implications of that the first time around btw. Bc I’m dumb I suppose.
- Activating the portal and using it as a meat grinder for bottlenecked demons is such an elegantly simple solution.
- “You’ll be hurt” HA OMG
- The headstones in the opening credits don’t change inscriptions, btw. Though I still can’t make out Adam’s
- The guitar in the intro music does though!!
- I think it might be two completely different bridges meeting up after the first one parts? I can’t quite tell.
- This episode’s theater is just called Every Day, with a picture of Aziraphale’s halo on the screen.
- THEY LITERALLY PASS MICHAEL AND URIEL. BEES.
- “It’s a bit lonely. That’s why I was so pleased to go to Earth.” That feels awfully significant. File it away next to demons not especially wanting to fight angels.
- Crowley having…grills, I think? Like Sandalphon. Oof.
- Finally did a bit of digging on Neil Gaiman’s views of angel hierarchy. Still don’t know that I entirely buy Angel Crowley was an Archangel, but higher up? Deffo buy it.
- Bottom of the barrel. Deffo they’re that stupid.
- So. Still a nuclear exchange, eh, folks?
- Nah is the funniest possible response.
- So Aziraphale doesn’t know the details of Gabriel, the Supreme Archangel, not being above getting demoted…hang on. Bit early to be trying to put that piece together. Just going to stew nervously I’m not even Gabriel being safe in going against “God’s” plan
- Nina and Maggie standing up to demons using fire extinguishers and encyclopedias. I love them.
- Wondering if it was Aziraphale’s nerves that caused these measures to be taken, or…Yknow. The nerves of the person who ran into the burning bookshop himself.
- Crowley having holes in his memory is true but also it’s so much funnier that he just. Doesn’t have a good memory for people. Not funny but also yes funny.
- EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANGEL. Yknow I can see why some people think it’s a bad thing that phrases like that were likely lifted from the fandom directly and tossed in, but I love it, shut up.
- Refused to exercise his celestial authority. Sometimes an angel just has to say “guys, enough.” HMM. HMMMMMMMM. HOW VERY INTERESTING.
- INSTITUTIONAL PROBLEM.
- The way Gabriel looks so BORED.
- The way Metatron looks furious. Disgusted, even.
- The fact that a memory wipe can be performed remotely: dangerous. Important.
- The fact that angels can be tracked entirely while in heaven: dangerous. Important.
- The fact that it seems to hurt Aziraphale to remove his halo: DANGEROUS. IMPORTANT.
- the way the bookshop rumbles and shakes when the halo lands tho
- ERIC NO
- Poor Eric.
- Shax being knocked out but not discorporated…interesting.
- Oh sure the mass transporter works just FINE for Heaven XD I love this train wreck of an awkward elevator ride.
- Interesting how Furfur is the one to come along with Dagon (who, I still can’t stress enough: FABULOUS this season)
- Electricity again not being used by an angel, but by a demon. All lightning is demonic this season. Hmm.
- Crowley maybe it isn’t wise to admit the two of you doing a miracle together is what caused the giant plume
- The moment I could NOT believe we were actually getting Ineffable Bureaucracy but was SO HAPPY ABOUT IT ACTUALLY
- Important too that Crowley shares pertinent details but not the actual scope of how he knows what he knows and what it all might mean before Metatron steps in. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
- Okay but was the entering of the eye necessary. Argh.
- I do like how they made the recasting a joke XD
- I’m sorry but the way the vibes of their meetings is so pitch-perfect for how the fandom was interpreting them for years makes me so proud of us all
- I just wish there was MORE
- You can’t always get what you live for. Every day it’s a getting closer
- Still wondering how in the heck that statue exists
- Gabriel being incapable of ordering drinks XD
- “You people. Amazing.” So important to Gabriel and Beelzebub’s love story that they explicitly fell in love with EACH OTHER, not earth, not humans, but also that even while on earth, Gabriel still has things he likes and appreciation for the atmosphere it can have. Earth is cool. Time they all admitted it.
- “No one’s ever given me anything before.” Anyone else suddenly emotional about the idea of Aziraphale introducing things like kindness and respect to Heaven? No? Just me? I know it’s not just me, “Aziraphale is a bee in the hive about to shake things up more than anticipated” truthers
- Aziraphale looking pretty terrified at Gabriel being back and Jim being gone. I know. Me too.
- But. But!! The way they’re openly affectionate now when it seems like they weren’t there yet in the past! The way Gabriel hugs himself when thanking them! AUGH!
- FOUND SOMETHING THAT MATTERED MORE TO ME THAN CHOOSING SIDES. THE SHOULDER TOUCH. I CRY.
- Michael. Michael they’ve been there the whole time. Calm down.
- I really do want to know if Crowley just casually brought Mr. Brown back from the dead, or just healed him from terrible maiming, or just wiped his memory bc he’s actually fine. THESE ARE IMPORTANT DETAILS DAMMIT.
- “Unless you’d like some help?” THEYRE SPEAKING. THEYRE COMMUNICATING. INSTEAD OF JUST ASSUMING WHAT THE OTHER NEEDS/WANTS.
- Aziraphale the angelic kindergarten teacher.
- “But we’d be the ones doing it.” They’re just saying all the quiet parts out loud, huh?
- Crowley offering Alphi Centauri ;A;
- The fact that THEY GET THE BANISHMENT OPTION when Crowley and Aziraphale DID NOT. Granted, they diverted six thousand plus years of planning, not just collaborating ambiguously to sappy unknown ends. Because AC LOVE EARTH. And GB DO NOT.
- The fact that they turn on the lights when they leave bc an angel and a demon doing miracles together is POWERFUL
- Aziraphale’s entire expression ;A; so tender. So loving.
- That was a weirdly erotic fist bump, Furfur and Shax
- “Do people ever ask for death? So predictable.” There’s that angelic arrogance, Metatron.
- And the Book of Life extreme sanctions again. Which makes me VERY nervous for s3, probably more nervous than anything else. That’s a very big Chekhov’s Gun to be laying on the table half-forgotten.
- Okay the fact that Saraquael picks it up before any of the others, too. As implied by her hands going folded and expression going nervous.
- “Have we done anything wrong?”
- “That remains to be seen.”
- HMM. OKAY.
- Take the coffee or take the death, Aziraphale. DAMN.
- The way Metatron neatly separates and snips Aziraphale and Crowley apart. The ominous organ music. The dressing-down of the Archangels but backhanded compliments to Muriel (the dim one I’LL KILL YOU). A master manipulator at work and he’s only just getting started.
- Crowley trying to get rid of Muriel feels weirdly protective, in hindsight.
- Crowley putting the bookshop back together ;A; the cello version of the theme waltz. <3333
- Aziraphale really should have been here for this conversation. I WEEP.
- Noooo not the soft romantic music again, it hurts. Also just realized that Nina and Maggie are still wearing their ball outfits.
- THIS CONVERSATION IS ALREADY A TRAIN WRECK. CROWLEY ASKING AZIRAPHALE IF CROWLEY CAN GO FIRST. AZIRAPHALE TALKING OVER CROWLEY.
- The thunder outside is getting massive as Metatron butters up Aziraphale. The ominous real world foreshadowing.
- The fact that keeping Crowley a demon isn’t even on the table. Going right for Aziraphale’s issues.
- THE CLOCK IS MAKING A FROWNY FACE
- Some other time I want to see Metatron’s assessment of Aziraphale next to Crowley’s assessment of Aziraphale bc I want to study the ways this hurts me.
- The EMOTIONS. DAVID AND MICHAEL PLS IM DYING.
- The manifold layers of mutual misinterpretation. I am BEGGING for a season 3 so I can see them untangle this.
- “I don’t think you understand what I’m offering you” just like you thought he was exaggerating the danger you were in just last episode, angel?
- No nightingales HOW DARE
- I fully believe Crowley is kissing Aziraphale goodbye here, tbh. Not showing him what he’s missing. Just saying bye. Maybe hoping on an off chance it will work but knowing it won’t. One spectacular kiss that I kind of love we don’t get every sloppy detail of. Makes it intimate even as it’s heartbreaking.
- The one thing he wanted to take with him won’t come. I CRY.
- Crowley is too smart for this but I’ve seen art of Crowley as the next grand Duke of hell and that would be a DELICIOUS setup, actually, and one I believe he could give into if he felt low enough. But. Crowley has always known better. He’s always wanted out, wanted better. If it was just him alone in the bookshop, maybe, but with Muriel there…idk. I feel like that’s not gonna happen, that Crowley is going to side with humanity. But I also didn’t think Aziraphale would ever go back to heaven so what do I know??
- The Second Coming. Phew. The event supposed to kick off after Armageddon, I think? Gonna be big.
- And here we have…the closing credits. The ones I was too overwhelmed to cry over the first time and maybe too entranced in my note taking to fully feel it here now but the sad piano and cello are certainly having an impact.
- Aziraphale not having all the details for what was happening to Gabriel makes me wonder how far he thinks he can push making a difference. Because the Supreme Archangel of Heaven was deposed for not doing what the rest of the archangels and the Metatron wanted. They can erase beings from existence. They can wipe memories remotely. They can track his every move. He’s walking into a trap.
- But. BUT.
- Crowley won’t let Aziraphale face this alone. Crowley and Aziraphale have swapped faces before. Crowley and Aziraphale have been on the wrong sides of the screen all season. Aziraphale’s determined face is very close to Crowley-As-Aziraphale. This season has been about lies and misdirection and sleight of hand. I like the theory that the kiss was another swap, that there was a time freeze where they came up with a plan, but. Also.
- I just. REALLY like the power of The Final Fifteen as-is, too. Because it’s been building all season, a head of steam that blows at a very critical moment in time. It’s the hard work of realizing their problems and issues and triggers haven’t been worked on at all, and if they’re ever going to be happy, they need to do the work. It’s not hand-waving their development off screen and actually putting us the audience in the front row of that development. Which is tasty as all heck too.
Okay. Second time didn’t hurt as much, knowing it was coming and pointing out all the clues that foreshadowed it. Next watch through I do without the buffer of constant pausing to record my thoughts and theories. I’m sure it’ll be fine.
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hesnotavillain ¡ 4 months
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is there still anyone here?
it's trully been ages and tbh i almost didn't remembered the right email or password. i was creating an account on substack, since apparently that's a thing now (or has been forever and i'm only now finding about bc people are sharing theirs on my timeline) bc i was feeling like writing to no one really, just to put some feelings into words and then i remembered this "place" exists.
so funny (and cringe, obviously) getting to see how i spent years and years and lived through so much mental illness and so many fictional obsessions. this is like a museum of a lifetime, im not kidding.
writing this is also making me see how fucking bad my english actually is nowadays (if it was ever better)
let's see. im 23. got in college last year. quit my antidepressants the year before - which was also the year the guy i was seeing (because surprise surprise, you're bi!) and didn't have much expectations on became my boyfriend and potential future husband. i love him very much and we laugh a lot together. ngl i do miss women sometimes tho. just that specific sapphic atmosphere you know? dont really see myself away from it for the rest of my life. i mean, that just sounds like a very long time.
oh! i started the gym very recently. cant say that it changed my life yet, but honestly im hoping on that. it doesnt really have to change my life, but if it gets me some dopamine to go through my days with a nice ass as a bonus, i'll be happy. eating is not really the problem, cooking is. im too fucking lazy and this is actually the biggest fucking rock on my shoes. is that even a saying outside brazil? anyway.
i want to say i miss being a teenager, like maybe being 16-19 but man how can i say this when i was so fucking miserable mentally for way before that. im way better now, but sometimes i miss it and i know that really the only thing i miss is not having a real thought about anything that concerns real life because i was too drowned on gay content and too engaged with my internet friends. lmao. that sure was the life huh.
i dont think this writing exercise is working, but i also dont know what there is to 'work' really. i feel like there's a zillion subjects travelling aroung my mind all the time and i wanna deal with each but never know where to start so i guess that explains the messines.
im kinda excited to turn 30 (in a I'm Totally Romanticizing Turning 30 From Now On Because I Believe I'll Be At My Finest Era slightly delusional way). (if global warming even let us get there without massively destructing my mediocre reality). im also scared of the day i'll lose my loved ones. i feel like for the first time in my life im starting to understand that there's just so much life to live. so much life. how can every single possible thing, even the good ones, result on anxiety tho.
im already tired of this (writing) and dont know how to finish but for now i guess the substancial thing i can't forget is that i made it to right here and i'm the one who can get me to right there. so. just keep rolling my dudes.
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one-abuse-survivor ¡ 1 year
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tw verbal abuse & possible neglect mention
i think my dad was verbally abusive to me and both of my parents were like, kinda neglectful towards me in some ways. and honestly, its not happening so much anymore, mostly bc i stopped talking to both of my parents for the most part and i go to therapy as well so my dad is scared to talk to me (bc he's uncomfortable that i go to therapy) and my mom talks to me but only a little (bc she thinks its her fault i 'have to' go to therapy).
but even though the neglect and verbal abuse isn't going on so much anymore, i still have to live with them (bc im severely disabled) and it just still hurts. like i don't know how to STOP the hurting. especially now that i can actually think 'yeah that was probably abusive yeah that was probably neglect' it HURTS, it fucking tears me up inside. like how could you do that, why would you do that. and technically, my mom didn't abuse me, i think she neglected me some, but i also think some of that was out of her control. but i also dont think i can forgive her for standing by while my dad was verbally abusing me-like she would be right there, mostly just ignoring it bc while she thought it was rude, she didn't think he was wrong and she didn't want to argue with him, so she would just let him tear me down. and neither of them apologized or anything, they just mostly dont talk to me anymore.
i just. it hurts. i don't know how to make it stop hurting and i hate it. i hate that i have to deal with this when its not even my FAULT, like i didn't ask for them to do this to me. they didn't apologize, they don't even really think they were wrong but im the only one going to therapy and the only one considered broken and im supposed to forgive and forget but i just hurt all the time and no one gives af. im sorry for ranting, i just so tired. i wondered if you have any advice for working on NOT hurting so much, on healing after being hurt by your parents even if they aren't apologizing or anything?
I'm Jax btw.
Hey, Jax!
I'm glad to hear you're going to therapy. This situation sounds really complicated and really unfair to you. You're right, none of this is your fault, and it sucks that you're the one who has to deal with all of this hurt now when they were the ones who hurt you. I'm glad you could express some of that hurt here, at least.
I'm not sure I have any useful advice, because I've been privileged enough to be able to unpack my trauma away from my abuser. I'm not sure I would've been able to work through my pain while still sharing a roof with her.
What I can say is that, while I think it's a good idea to look for ways to help you process your hurt so it becomes less painful, I really hope you know that you shouldn't be expected to "forgive and forget" and just be fine. You're still actively living with the people who abused and neglected you, and they continue to deny it ever happened. They haven't apologised for hurting you and they're not trying to be better. So, please, don't beat yourself up for continuing to show and feel signs of trauma. It's okay to not be able to fully heal—and it would be really unfair to expect you to, given your circumstances.
All that being said, I can list some exercises that have helped me personally process and overcome some of my hurt, in case they might be helpful:
Writing down a list of all the separate emotions I feel when I'm feeling hurt (anger, sadness, fear, hatred, disgust...) and then writing down in a paragraph what each separate emotion is saying in my head, in order to give it a voice and the space to exist. (After doing this a couple of times, my therapist suggested adding one last voice called "self-care" and writing down what such a voice would say if it was present in my head, and it helped).
Assigning each of my emotions a colour and painting abstract colour blobs, pouring out all the different emotions (and the ways they intertwine) on the paper.
Writing fictional stories that explore trauma and recovery in-depth.
Reclaiming the "abuse survivor" label and talking openly about my trauma (with people's consent, without trauma-dumping).
My new therapist is also going to guide me through an exercise on processing anger on our next session, so I might share my experience with that eventually, if I find it useful. Maybe it can help others! Especially if you already have a therapist you can suggest this exercise to.
Does anyone have any other advice for Jax?
Take care ❤️
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shotorozu ¡ 4 years
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hellolololo!ÂĄ! so i recently saw this video where their
s/o goes on to omegle and the other person from omegle like goes “hi ur cute” or “u have snap?” and then their boyfriend just enters the frame,, can u do that to todobakudeku separately :3
if u dont understand u can check this out 😭 https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSJdEqc7V/ tyy ❤️❤️
“ur kinda cute” on omegle
(tiktok prank)
character(s) : todoroki shouto, bakugou katsuki, midoriya izuku (bnha)
part two — part three
legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns used, quirk not mentioned
headcanon type : fluff, crack — ‘x reader’
note(s) : i love these types of requests 🤩 so i plan on making 3 parts with this (oh and don’t worry, i’ll finish the other tiktok prank series i have going on at the moment)
also, there’s no proofread on this so if there’s any typos or mistakes, sorry! i’ll be editing them in the morning
┈ ✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁ ┈
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todoroki shouto
okay so, the entire tiktok idea was planned— but the part where shouto came in surely wasn’t staged
so, being a curious young person— you wanted to make a tiktok, where you went on omegle just to speak to people for fun
and inside of your head, you’re kinda thinking that “this is dumb, omg im going to get flashed on there.” also while you were setting up your laptop
but you just used the appropriate tags and !! you were set off for an adventure
you set your phone aside, and you filmed most of the experience— cutting out the not so interesting encounters out of your tiktok
and then came on a dude, who had a,, unique reaction. he didn’t seem all that fishy— until he asked you for your snap (your social medias, essentially)
“you’re kinda cute, y’know. how did i not see you before?”
you shake your head, “oh no no! i appreciate your compliment, but i’m very much taken!” your mind immediately flashing back to the image of your icyhot boyfriend
“nahh you’re lying! i don’t see any dude back there”
oh,, and that was because shouto was out getting snacks 🧎 “no really dude, i appreciate it! i’m very much taken and being disloyal is out of the question!”
this dude just kept insisting and insisting, and due to the struggle— you weren’t able to hear the door knob jiggle
it seemed to be that his advances came to an end, and your lover made an entrance— a mop of red and white peaked out from the door frame
and the dude literally got scared and ended the conversation 💀 because you really weren’t lying!
you also figured that it was time to end your omegle shenanigans, and finish the tiktok— because your boyfriend was already there “hi love, who were you talking to?”
you closed your laptop, and offered him a smile “i was on omegle for a tiktok! i’m glad you’re back.” you discard your phone, wrapping your arms around his torso (and also making sure you don’t delete the draft)
shouto doesn’t say a lot, but he immediately accepts your touch, setting the groceries aside.
he doesn’t question the fact that you were on omegle because well,, he had to get used to your shenanigans on tiktok SOMEHOW
a few hours later, you posted the tiktok— and almost immediately, the tiktok gains a lot of attention
“i love how your boyfriend drove the last dude away 💀💀” “man the last dude didn’t take the hint 🗿” “your boyfriend indirectly protected you! we need more guys like him.”
you snicker at the comments, which ultimately gathered shouto’s attention “what’s up, love?”
you show him the tiktok, “the tiktok did well.” he’ll comment calmly, but shouto’s lowkey MAD ?? that a dude had the audacity. but he’s just glad that you’re happy just maybe,, don’t go on omegle anymore 💀
“love— next time, let me in on your tiktoks.” he says, running a thumb along your cheek lightly. because he was actually quite entertained, putting everything aside
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bakugou katsuki
as if bakugou katsuki would let you go on OMEGLE, a place that’s known for having the sketchiest people to ever exist— but make it virtual
but being with you made him realize that well,, if you want to do something, you’ll go through lengths just to do it.
even the great bakugou katsuki can’t really stop you. whatever makes you happy— but oh, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t highly discourage it
which lead you to go on omegle for a tiktok in the other room, while bakugou exercised in the very next room.
when you told him that you wanted to film a tiktok, bakugou only shrugged— “don’t do overly dumb shit.” was what he only told you and he left the door open too
you then set up your phone and laptop, applied the appropriate tags— and went off to make your tiktok
you only filmed the interesting encounters, and the people you met on there were very diverse in personality and just,, in general.
after the 4th encounter, then came a rather interesting dude. he didn’t seem all that ordinary but he wasn’t spectacular. he was just nice
and the conversation was rather normal— until he started asking for your socials “putting everything aside, do you have social media? you’re really cute.”
you reject immediately, “oh no, i appreciate your words but— i already have a boyfriend.”
you just have to hope that he noticed bakugou walking back and forth with equipment, but with his next words— that doesn’t seem to be the case
“i didn’t see anyone back there, a simple no would’ve been sufficient instead.” uh oh
“no really, i—” and before things escalated, katsuki’s head peaked through the door frame, freshly out of the shower “are you almost done, idiot?”
the dude literally looked behind you, and thought “oh shit, their boyfriend is bakugou fucking katsuki.” because bakugou is famous for,, multiple different reasons
the dude’s camera shakes in terror, “oh uhm,, it was nice meeting you!” not long before he dips from of the conversation, never to be seen again.
closing your laptop— you end the tiktok while bursting into laughter, and this action just confused katsuki ever further. he heard you speaking to someone, and when he looked, the person was nowhere to be seen
“what are you laughing at??”
“nothing katsuki, i was laughing at the tiktok i just made.”
then— you figured that it would be best to tell katsuki now that you were on omegle (long story short, he wasn’t pleased)
he scolded you that you shouldn’t be on omegle, but let’s be honest, he couldn’t stay mad at you— so he just cuddles the frustration away
when you upload the tiktok the following hours, it blows up pretty quickly—with comments like “LOL IS THAT BAKUGOU KATSUKI??” “he had guts until he saw bakugou katsuki 💀” “tbh i’d be scared too”
and when you report the news the katsuki, he smirks— “as he should be.”
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midoriya izuku
at this point, izuku is very much used to your shenanigans on tiktok. he’s very supportive of whatever you do all in all
but, about omegle,,, yeah,, as much as he trusts you— he does not trust omegle. he’s aware that it’s a shady place, and he doesn’t advise that you do go on that website bc he cares
so when you brought up the tiktok idea, he proposed that he’d be there, right beside you just to monitor if anyone’s being weird :)
and that’s great! because you also wanted to ask if he wanted to be a reoccuring guest in your tiktok— and of course, what kind of boyfriend would he be if he opposed?
he helps you set up your laptop and phone— all of that sort of stuff, and then you guys were off to make an interesting tiktok
oh, but izuku did apply the appropriate tags because he didn’t want you to see odd things he was secretly nervous but,, you were very ethusiastic, so he was too.
the first several people were interesting in their own way— especially with their reactions to your boyfriend appearing on screen
usually, they’d back off with, and comment on how cute your boyfriend is— wishing the both of you well before calmly leaving to meet new people,
that was how it was, until you met this person in particular.
he sounded very,, egotistical— i wouldn’t say that because you’ve just met the dude, but he acted like everyone wanted him or it sounded like that
then he says, “you definitely have a phone number, right? you’re cute, just my type.” wkdksmd this is awkward since izuku’s right beside you, but he’s just outside of the frame
then, izuku pops out of the frame— in all his cute ass glory, he gives a small wave to the not so pleased stranger
“please, that’s your boyfriend?” he scoffs, “with those arms, he looks like he could be your little brother! now let me ask again—”
it’s really weird?? because have you seen izuku’s gainz?? and this dude’s audacity is extraordinary.
but little did this guy know, he’s looking at midoriya izuku— and,, you’ve seen his performance in the sports festival.
the dude takes another glance at your boyfriend, who’s sitting there right beside you— and he realizes who he was talking to
“oh shit, you’re—” and before the both of you could realize it, he nopes out of the conversation.
after that encounter, you burst into a fit of laughter— the look on izuku’s face being priceless. “you should’ve seen your reaction!”
“haha, i guess he knew who i was,” he says bashfully, cheeks warming up. because it registered in his mind that people actually knew who he was. “can you,, upload the tiktok later? i want to hug you— i mean! if that’s fine.”
of course it’s fine! you oblige, and give him all the hugs he could ever need
after cuddling with izuku, you do upload the tiktok— and an hour later, your tiktok notifications blow up
the tiktok all in all gathered 1M views, 780K likes, and over 1,500 comments— most of them saying stuff like
“your boyfriend’s reaction was so cute?? i know he looked like he was going to punch him through the screen but 👀” “last dude was just not it.” “LMAO HE REALLY TRIED IT” “is your boyfriend IZUKU MIDORIYA??”
when you excitingly showed him the tiktok’s results, he was certainly pleased— because most of the comments were positive, and also because the tiktok’s results made you happy
“i’m glad that it did well!” he’ll sigh in relief, pressing a kiss against your temple, let’s just not go on there ever again
┈ ✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁ ┈
likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!
i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby
do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission
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moonchildstyles ¡ 2 years
Note
hellooo miss lindsee! hope you have a great day/night! i would love to ask you some questions about your „writing journey“
when exactly did you start to write and how did you develope as a writer or get better at it? or were you always this good and talented 🤓?
i want to write a book at one point in my life or even do this for a living but i‘m a little scared honestly cause i haven’t ever written a whole book just poems or little „insights“ and ideas. so your advice would be quite beneficial and would mean the absolute world to me!!
ummmm so for me I started writing on here in like 2014/2015 w a couple of breaks here and there and then things got more consistent for me in early 2019 but in general.....before fic I did not like writing at all like it was always my least favorite thing to do in school and I just always considered myself more of a reader than a writer like the reason I started writing in the first place was because I just....I wanted to evoke that same feeling I got in my chest when reading my favorite fics but like....alter it so its EXACTLY what I liked and what I wanted and other ppl seem to like it too which is fun!!! thats kind of how I "started" but I like....I honestly don't think ive Developed as a writer until this last year. and trust me if u ever see my old stuff.....not saying im Perfect now but back then....I was even farther away from perfect than I am now HUSFHSUHFUS I think the things that have helped me become a better writer completely align w how much I read other things and how much I allow myself to indulge stupid ideas that I have GHSIFHSUHFS reading other ppls work and books and other just Concepts help like broaden your view of what you can also achieve in my opinion like ur not stealing ideas or anything like that but youre taking in a new vocabulary and new world someone crafted so you can see if you can push ur own limits and see how you can find something similar to that in ur own style! and like allowing urself to write those ideas that ur not sure you even Love or if you ever want anyone to read isn't a waste of time bc its like still expanding ur like thought process on writing and exploring different dynamics or character and it can grow into something yu love or it was just a good exercise to see where you feel like you fall in terms of writing and style and genre.
and like ofc just loving what you write and having faith in it is always the biggest thing like if you love it that energy will be reflected back to you when it hits the right light. writing is hard and going at ur own pace and taking those breaks and taking a moment to find your Style is so huge! good luck on all the things bestie I always feel like I get jumbley on these kinds of questions so I hope it helped!
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heyitsyn ¡ 4 years
Text
HALLOKNEE
Manager!Seijoh
a/n: a halloween special with our boys and the mess it is
summary: lets just say,, things get weird during halloween
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okay so first of
halloween isnt a favorite holiday of most of the boys
like they all ltr are towers and skyscrapers but these kids are absolutely terrified of it all
but you just really like the holiday bc of yanno, candy, scary stuff, and omg costumes!
so you were basically very hyped and excited about it and you were excitedly humming to yourself as the date grew closer
the boys were confused as to why you were actually happy and in a good mood but they didnt complain bc they love seeing you happy
the flowery aura makes them heart eyes
HEART GOES DOKIDOKI
oikawa ran over and he stood behind you as you were distractedly humming to your clipboard
‘watcha doing, y/n-chan?’
he whispered to your ear
normally, you would shriek or flinch but you didnt and instead, turned and flashed him a grin
‘checking our schedule! i have a surprise for you all and i want to make sure theres nothing happening to stop it from happening!’
the boys grimaced and held a hand to their heart at your joy and they didnt even question what was going on or why you were so excited
all they know is you were happy
lmao oikawa got the hardest shot to it
he was front seat and his eyes widened and he froze
then he pulled you to his chest and nuzzled his face into your neck
‘aawwww~~!!!! youre so cute y/n-chan!!’
these idiots are so whipped and simp for you so hard that they completely forgot everything
your happiness continued for another week and my god that was probably the best week of their life bc you were just fluttering and giggling and skfjdslkjfdlflfkjs
to be fair though, you mentioned halloween being close and you were looking forward to a family night of watching scary movies in tv and duh these boys were already arguing with each other on who would protect you
‘I WANNA SIT NEXT TO  Y/N-CHAN!’
‘WHY?! SO YOU CAN HAVE AN EXCUSE TO HOLD HER?! YOURE A PERVERT SHITTYKAWA!’
‘AS IF YOURE NOT ANY BETTER IWAIZUMI!’
‘HANAMAKI STAY OUT OF THIS!’
ltr its just a big warcry between the third years while the second and first years already were getting head pats from you for being brave boys and were comfy right next to you
‘my boys are so cute~’
ITS A LOVE SHOT! NAAA NANANANANANANAANANAAAAAA
by then, the surprise was getting closer and you were already jumping in your toes
the night before, you texted the group chat to meet you at the school by 8 pm tomorrow
they all sent replies saying okay with no questions
‘okay love you y/n-chan! <3′
‘got it! good night!’
‘sweet dreams darling!’
at around 7:30, you were standing by the school bus since coach mizoguchi omg bless his heart was going to drive you all
the boys were all dressed in warm clothing and my gosh they all looked like models what the heck
we’re just going to ignore and forget that hideous infamous oikawa outfit
but you didnt focus on that and instead waved at them happily
‘you guys!’
oikawa jumped joyfully at your voice before naruto running over to you and scooping you in his arms
‘y/n-chan!’
he shouted and you didnt mind being twirled around since you were giggling and laughing
after iwa punched his head, oikawa had to let you down and they continued bickering so you took this chance to go over to the others by the side
‘are you all excited?’
you asked and they smiled softly
kunimi ruffled your hair and you grabbed his hand
‘it’s really sweet you planned something for us, y/n’
watari reached over to pat your head and you wholeheartedly accepted the affection
‘oi, just tell us’
kyotani grumbled but you cutely smiled and held a peace sign
‘nooo~~!’
you checked your watch and you jumped
‘oh my! we need to hurry on the bus now!’
you herded everyone to sit in their seats and oikawa raised an eyebrow at the driver
‘oh? why is-’
‘your dear manager wanted to have a bonding exercise for the team. how could we refuse? oh, coach irihata said to make sure you know how to breathe and calm down’
the last sentence made question marks appear on everyone’s heads but you waved it off
‘oh come on, mizoguchi-san! dont ruin the surprise!’
you whined from your seat and the elder caught your eye at the rearview
‘just making sure to warn them, especially oikawa’
‘me?’
but he went unanswered 
the team gave up trying to ask you bc you would just mischieviously smile and shake your head cutely
‘nope~! not tellingggg~!’
but oh my they were answered
mizoguchi dropped everyone off in front of a building where there was also other people at
owo the people just simply stared bc omg like 12 boys? thats freaking great and i have finally lived and can die peacefully now
the team blinked as they got off the shuttle bus and they were so confused that you waved mizoguchi off to make sure the boys wouldn’t run back to the bus if they figure it out
ofc our ever smart baby kunimi was the first to figure it out and his mouth opened
‘why,,, do you hate us, y/n-chan?’
slowly the light bulbs turned on in everyone’s heads and they all had the same shocked look
DKFLSJDKFJLDKFLJ LIKE IN OHSHC WHEN THEY FIGURED OUT HARUHI’S A GIRL OMG I MISS THAT SHOW
‘nope! im going home!’
kindaichi started to walk but you hurriedly grabbed his arm
‘nooo yuu-kun!!! noo!! please stay!! i worked so hard!!!’
you looked up with your puppy dog eyes and kindaichi scrunched his face up
no no no fight it kindaichi
but ofc hes weak to you so he sighed and went back with the group
‘oi, are you insane or what?’
kyotani, despite his tough facade, wasnt exactly the greatest with any jumpscares in movies so having a jumpscare in real life wouldn’t exaclty be,,,, not violent
but you trust he can handle it and leave the place without a charge for assault
it was clear the others were already regretting it and you got sad bc you did work hard on getting a reservation since this haunted house was the most haunted in this part of japan
your figure in front of them made them tear their eyes away from the scary windows which they swore had someone staring at them
‘come on, you guys! we’ll have fun! i promise! its not that scary!’
you assured but they still didnt look convinced
‘you know, i just,,, i wanted everyone to,, bond and,,, have fun,,,,,, and because halloween is my favorite holiday,, i thought i could share it with you all. but im sorry that i was selfish and,,,, did it even though you guys dont like it’
not at y/n being totally manipulative and using their affections and attraction to her to help her case
your downcast expression and sad eyes snapped them out of it and they just sucked it up and they all shared a look that practically meant
‘suck it up, and make sure y/n is having fun. forget about us, its her time right now’
this led to you guys standing in front of the door guy and he cracked up at the sight of this cute little girl bouncing in her shoes with a group of guys who looked pale and nauseous
‘reservation name?’
‘seijoh!’
you exclaimed and he looked in the list before nodding
‘okay. so first, the rope is what guides you all. make sure, whatever you do, never lose grip on it bc you might get lost. keep in mind, this is an actual abandoned hospital and is known to actually be haunted so unless you want to go ghost-hunting and meet unknown people or spirits, dont stray off’
that warning should’ve scared you like the boys but you just agreed with a bright grin
‘yep!’
the doorguy chuckled before reaching into the box beside him
ngl oikawa was already so scared that he flinched, not knowing what was inside of it
‘a flashlight to help you guide yourselves’
you held it tight and yahaba was already holding on to your jacket sleeve
‘also, phones in the bin, please’
‘hah?!’
iwaizumi started but you placed a hand on his chest
‘its to make sure no one films anything and ruins the surprise’
you assured and he stopped but continued glaring
everyone hesitantly placed their phones into the bin where they saw it being locked into a locker and the key was given to you
‘you can get it back when you exit so dont worry’
you nodded and the team rolled their eyes but nodded anyways
brats
‘all set? okay! go on in! happy hunting!’
omg you were slightly regretting it already
kyotani refused to not be away from you so he was holding your hand while yahaba remained clutching you
the third years wanted to appear all tough so they took the lead but oikawa was screeching and screaming at the littlest things which caused makki to scream and mattsun to also scream and then iwa and everyone else
it was like a screaming train
you even heard kyo gasp multiple times and you tightened your grip on his hand to assure him he was okay and you were right there
everything was going smoothly excused the screaming and everyone was actually having a little bit of fun since it was funny watching everyone scream at the littlest things
‘NOOO!!!!!!’
‘WAAAAHHHH!!!!!!’
the many rooms had the actors and dear god they should be emmy winning by how they just stared at you all and still sent shivers down your spines
then the unthinkable happened
the flashlight that iwaizumi was holding started to flicker and eventually died, leaving you all stranded in the pitch-dark
there wasnt even any light above you so everything was just black
everyone stopped, your breathing being paused and no one made a sound
‘RAAAA!’
someone from beside you shouted in your ear and you screamed so loudly and in instinct, everyone bolted forward with no direction on where to go
kunimi and kindaichi were holding each others hands and ran also dragging along watari since he was holding kunimi’s sleeve and also yahaba and you and kyo
‘IWA-CHAN!!!’
oikawa instinctively shouted and they all held on to each other
mattsun expected to catch ahold of watari’s hoodie since he was behind him but there was nothing but air
‘uh, you guys?’
he wished and prayed and hoped your voice would answer back but there was silence
‘oi! l/n y/n!’
he shouted and makki trembled in fear
‘iwaizumi? oikawa?’
‘h-huh!’
iwaizumi grunted and my goodness was this really happening
everything was going too smoothly that something bad happening shouldve been seen from the get-go!
the 4 third years were thankfully with each other since they were already huddled up at the front but their kouhais were nowhere near them
‘iwa-chan! what do we do!’
oikawa cried and iwaizumi hit him to keep him quiet
‘shut up shittykawa!’
‘oi! stop fighting and think about this!’
mattsun quieted them down into shaking forms
‘the team is gone. theyre somewhere in this hospital and there’s a chance theyve strayed off the path’
makki shakily breathed
‘so what should we do?’
iwaizumi bit his lip to think of a plan
‘should we just go around and shout and scream for them?’
oikawa suggested but makki turned it down
‘no. that would ruin it for everyone else. we’re not the only ones in here’
oikawa blanched
‘i dont care about the other people! who knows what happened to y/n! i give no fck about strangers when she could be lost somewhere in this big ass hospital!’
they were stumped with no solutions so they just agreed to iwa’s suggestion
‘lets just hurry and get this over with and meet the people outside and get their help’
‘or! we can ask the staff in here, the actors, to help us! this is an accident’
‘you stupid or dumb? you think they would help us? its an us problem, not theirs, so theyre not going to abandon their post and look for them’
ltr maybe its the panic thats making them all crazy but they just settledon hurrying up and finishing the maze so they could get help
but the moment they turned to what seems to be a corner, they already managed to get themselves lost
iwaizumi felt around for the familiar texture of the rope which is supposed to be at his right but in the end, his hand reached nothing
‘fck!’
he shouted and scared the other 3
‘WHAT?!’
makki yelled
‘the rope. the rope’s not here anymore’
silence
then oikawa sobbed
‘oh my god im going to die’
he whimpered and makki sniffled
‘i wanna go home’
mattsun and iwa were the only at least stable ones and they finally resigned to defeat and grabbed their friends and walked to nowhere
on to your side!!
you and the others finally stopped running but the beating of your hearts still pumped at a fast speed
‘are we safe now?!’
kindaichi shouted and there was a chorus of confusion amongst the others
‘iwa-san?’
you checked and usually he would grunt but there was just silence
it was quiet and the familiar voice of oikawa was nowhere in sight
‘i dont know about you guys but my oikawa sensors just shut off’
yahaba pointed out and you gasped
‘where are they?’
kyotani refused to let go so you felt around with your left hand for the rope
to your relief, it was still there but the feeling of the missing boys outweighed it and made your anxiety levels spike up
‘should we call them? lets call them’
yahaba started but kyotani bonked his head
‘baka. they took our phones earlier’
the reminder of the confiscated form of communication meant that there was no other way you could contact the others
panic bubbled over kindaichi watari and yahaba while you kunimi and kyotani were busy thinking of something
‘i think theyve strayed off. if they didn’t, they wouldve heard us from up there’
kunimi mumbled
‘but where else could they have gone to?’
you asked and kyotani huffed beside you
‘we cant see anything. hell, i cant even see you. obviously theres probably a hallway they ran down to without even knowing they went there’
‘so youre saying theyre lost? without any way to contact us? what do we do?’
you whimpered, finally realizing and the idea of the others being gone settling in
‘this is all my fault. i shouldnt have dragged you here. i made a mistake-’
‘hey, dont freak out. im right here’
even though you couldnt see him, kenta maneuvered his way to cup your face and you felt his forehead press against yours and his nose nuzzling your cheek
the smell of cherry blossoms and vanilla with the slightest hint of sandalwood
kyotani’s scent comforted you and you were able to calm down 
‘we’ll figure this out. its okay, you got me’
he whispered and you nodded 
‘youre right here. we’ll be okay, okay?’
you giggled a little bit at the repitition of the word but smiled when he pulled you close to his chest
ugh i mightve already written a kyo route but that doesnt stop me from putting in kyo moments :”)
the other 4 were figuring out a plan that was eerily similar to the 3rd years
‘lets just finish this and ask the staff for help later’
they all agreed to kunimi’s idea and hurriedly gripped the rope to start going back to the path
you were in between kindaichi and kyotani with the former in front and the latter behind you
‘im right here. you got this’
kyotani would occasionally whisper and you were so grateful to have someone to be there
then the lights flickered and your eyes caught sight of something down the hallway to your left and you noticed a shadow 
a shadow of a tall figure that was kinda familiar
‘y/n-chan~’
you flinched and the voice of your blocker filled your ears
‘mattsun-san?’
you were too focused on the voice to hear the others questions of what was happening
‘over here, y/n-chan~’
there it was again
‘mattsun-san!’
you shouted and bolted to the hallway where you were sure the voice was at and you were ignoring the shouts of the others and kyotani hurriedly ran after you
‘mattsun-san!’
you shouted again and you ended up at the hallway, with the lights still flickering but there was no one
kyotani panted as he caught up to you before snatching your hand
‘oi! dont run off like that!’
it seems the others were too scared to let go of the rope that they were fine if kyotani went after you bc he was strong so he could protect you both if needed
right?
kyotani is a bark bark woof woof boy not a priest
you felt his warm hand grip your again as if to signal that you werent running off alone again
‘i heard him i swea-’
‘to your left, y/n-chan~’
ok ngl im getting chills writing this
the flickering lights allowed you to see the shadow again and yep there it was
it was at the end of the hallway to your left and once you turned and saw it, it ran to the right
‘mattsun-san! wait!’
as you were going to run, kyotani refused to let you go
he placed strong hands to your shoulders and you looked up at him, your eyes manic
‘listen to me, y/n. youre hearing things’
he firmly said
‘i dont hear matsukawa or anyone’
you started breathing heavily, the air seemingly getting colder and thinner
‘you dont understand! he was right there! his shadow-!’
‘let her play a game, boy!’
matsukawa’s voice this time took a harsh tone and even kyotani jumped, holding you to his chest protectively
‘oi! matsukawa! its not funny anymore!’
your eyes looked over kyo’s shoulder and you saw the shadow again from behind him
‘please trust me, kyo! hm?’
you begged and he sighed
‘im holding on to you. im not letting you go again’
this wouldve been romantic if you werent in an actual paranormal story
you chased after the ghost and it would occasionally whisper in your ear to keep your attention until you ran into a pitch-black hallway
‘what do we do now, y/n?’
kyo whispered and you trembled
‘mattsun-san!’
you weakly cried, knowing there was a strong possibility he wouldnt answer back
but a loud screech from the far right brought hope into you
‘Y/N-CHAN!’
is that-
‘oikawa-san?!’
you shrieked and there was a trample of footsteps running over to you and naturally, kyotani pulled you behind him
then a hand made you shriek 
‘relax. its just me, y/n-chan’
mattsun’s voice sounded clearer this time since he was right beside you and you hugged him
‘come on. everyone hold hands so that no one will get lost. we’ll take about this later’
iwa commanded and as the true leader of the gang, everyone followed his lead
there was a red sign with the most amazing word on top of it
‘EXIT’
it looked like a door that was only meant for staff but at this point, you all were desperate to just leave
as you reached the handle, the voice came back
‘aw~ leaving so soon?’
you turned around, halting mattsun and kyotani as they held your hands and felt you stop
‘show yourself. i know you’re not mattsun-san so stop using his voice’
you demanded and you turned, feeling a chilly air rush behind you
‘boo~’
it whispered to your ear and you eyes widened at the sight from further down the hallway
you could make out a mass of a body and at the top, there was bright red eyes and white teeth smiling menacingly
‘oh my god’
you whispered and the boys saw exactly what you were seeing
‘what is that’
oikawa whimpered
its mouth obviously moved as it spoke
‘are you leaving me, y/n-chan? so cruel~’
its voice was sickly sweet and sounded like a teenage boy’s but was so mean and hate-filled
you started sobbing and oikawa turned the door to run but it stayed put and didnt budge
‘you were so fun to play with~ are your friends fun too~?’
it looked like it was coming closer with a hand outstretched and you started shivering and your voice ripped into a scream
‘stop! go away!’
iwa mustered all his strength and ran against the metal door but it opened on its own, leaving the boy to land on the grass from outside
you were pulled by the others before it could touch you and you were already hysterically crying before the first and second years ran over and engulfed you to a hug
you were being hushed by the them and you tightly held on to someone’s arms
‘sshhh its okay, we’re right here’
you reduced to hiccups before looking around
‘w-where’s the other people?’
you asked, taking notice of the empty field
‘are we at the back?’
the boys shared a confused look
‘huh? what are you talking about, y/n?’
you looked at yahaba like he was crazy
‘the other people! the other people wanting to go in! and the doorguy! the haunted event! the haunted house!’
their eyes flickered everywhere to try and make sense of what you were saying but in the end resulted to just pure confusion and fear
‘y/n, we’re not at some event’
iwa started and your eyes widened
‘w-what?’
makki shakingly placed a hand on your shoulder
‘y/n, you dragged us here to go ghost-hunting. and there’s no doorguy’
your eyes flickered down as your mind tried to wrap itself with what was going on
‘what do you mean? i took you here for a haunted attraction! the doorguy took our phones and locked them in a locker, remember?’
you wildly waved your arms around but they still didnt understand
‘and the flashlight! and the rope! w-we had to hold on to the rope! the rope made sure we didnt stray off the path! bu-but the flashlight! the flashlight died!’
kunimi noticed the beginning of a panic attack so he pulled you close to him and made sure you could feel his heartbeat
‘listen to me, y/n. you took us here because we all lost a bet with you and this was what you wanted since its halloween and we trespassed to go here and there was no doorguy who took our phones because all our phones died the moment we got here and we saw a rope hanging from the ceiling and we had no flashlight in the first place’
he whispered to your ear and you pushed away from him, curling your arms around yourself
‘no! what bet?! i took you here for bonding time for our volleyball team! you were getting busy for inter high so i figured this could help you have fun!’
now that took the cake
‘what volleyball team?’
your eyes finally settled on your ‘captain’
‘what do you mean, ‘what volleyball team’, oikawa-san?’
totally disregarding the fact that you just called him by his last name instead of his first, he focused on what you were talking about
‘if you wanted to bond with the volleyball team, then you brought the wrong sport team over then’
oikawa scoffed, feeling rage bubbling inside him at the familiar players of the volleyball team
‘you shouldve brought over nagisa and rin and them, then, y/n’
makki bitterly mumbled and you were just so exhausted and tired and confused
‘WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT’
you bursted and started crying which ofc prompted the others to calm down and focus on you
‘y/n, love, we’re the swimming team, not the little ball playing game’
mattsun reminded and you shook your head, disbelief and utter fear present in your face
‘then-then! oikawa-san! give me your right knee!’
you ran over and he questioningly raised his leg
‘uhh,, what are you doing, y/n?’
kunimi asked but you waved him off, determination in your eyes
‘this should prove hes a volleyball player’
then you punched it really hard which resulted with a sickening pop
oikawa screamed
a/n: idk if the concept is clear enough but uwu send in a guess and ill answer if you got it right
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krreader ¡ 4 years
Note
I've had mild symptoms. A tempeture, and cough really. I was in quarantine for 2 weeks and then I had to do another test. I was so glad though since I couldn't go anywhere, I got a lot of my online classes done!!!
I just wanted to post all of these, because you all helped me more than I can say. I was so scared and confused at first, but hearing all your stories made me feel so much better. If any of you is testing positive in the future, save this post and read through it, all these lovely people are a massive help!!!!!!
anonymous asked: my best friend tested positive but they didn’t call her same as you and she payed a little more for a better test and it came out negative. Could be a false positive!
@nendere asked: tips from my friend who's a front line nurse now. You need a lot of hot liquid and nutritious food. But not coffee, that's dehydrating. Keep yourself warm. After 7-15 days your symptoms can disappear if you're taking it lightly. If you have a cough, don't lie down, lay on your side or sit. relax your muscles. stay in a good ventilated room. if you throat starts to hurt, eat a teaspoon of honey. You should not leave the house for a month,for a month you still have the virus and can infect others.
anonymous asked:  I’m sorry to hear you got Covid! When it happened to my dad, he actually got really sick. The doctor had him and my whole family quarantine for 14 days and then retest. We all tested too, but luckily were negative, but still had to quarantine. When he finally got a negative test, we were all good to unquarantine. Depending how sick you are tho, take longer if you need it/are able to! Bc my dad really needed longer to recoup than the 14 days and he had side effects for a while.
anonymous asked:  Girl dont worry and dont stress yourself my aunt and cousin had it but now they dont anymore drink a lote of water vitamin C and zinc trust everyday do that try to stay a little active like if u live alone do some cleaning to keep u moving if u live in an area thats a little empty just wear ur mask and go for a walk far away from people dont just stay in bed when my aunt had it she said she didnt feel anything she just couldnt smell or taste anything at all like she’ll eat a spoonfull of mustard and not feel a thing. But trust vitaminC zinc water are the key and dont stress aver it its gonna pass i promise we love you Hey im the anon who talked about the vitamin c and zinc also if you have some lemons try to make a lemon juice its also really good
anonymous asked:  Omg I hope you’re doing ok and will continue to do so. My mom got COVID a few months back, she had to do 14 days of quarantine or until she had two negative tests in a row. But that’s in Denmark, I’m not sure how Germany handles things😥
anonymous asked: Omg, I hope you get better :( As long as I know you have to stay at home at least for 2 weeks, but idk how true this info is, I live in 3rd world lmao Take care bby 💕
@softyoongistuff asked:  Hi! First of all I hope you get well really soon. I have had people in my family who got thise virus. While the virus is deadly, it nothing that young blood can't fight. I am sure you'll get well soon. As for the stay at home thing, quarantine yourself for at least 14 days. Drink lots of immunity booster tea, which includes a pinch of tea, ginger, lemon, and black pepper. Drink this at least 3 times a day, you can add a bit of sugar to it. While its not medically approved? its really affecting in boosting the immunity, as proven according to ayurveda. Take steams. Eat healthy. Do a bit of exercise and deep breathing. Practice some yoga, like pranayam. Record your temperature too. Hope this helps.✊🏼
anonymous asked:  Hey Michelle! I’m sorry that you got covid but I’ve been there too (actually, this is my first week after recovering) I’d recommend for you to take paracetamol if you got fever for more than 1 day! Stay at home, rest and be careful with back pains, that can mean something is not right on your lungs! Also, try to take showers only at daytime and to not drink anything cold. What I learnef from this is that those little things can affect and get it worst! Be careful and please, keep us updated! It’s gonna be fine :)💖💖
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spidercrimes ¡ 5 years
Note
if it's not too much to write, how about All even numbers for the OC asks for either character of your choice! or both if you're feelin wild whatever works : ]
wheezes this took so long but im finally done holy shit
2. Do they have any titles? How did they get them?
Echo doesn’t have any official titles, and isn’t really planning on getting any, unless Champion of Sune counts?
4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents?
Echo has a very good relationship with her moms! To their knowledge, things were a bit tense after leaving Ivydome, but plenty of letters and visiting when they could helped with smoothing over their relationship. A good memory would be when her moms taught Echo how to bake! They can really only bake cupcakes and cookies but theyre like. Hella good ones. They dont really have any bad memories with/of their parents, since like. They will forcibly forget or repress anything that upsets them, as long as it only affected them. If the memory is something bad that affected others it will linger for however long Echo deems necessary(read: an extremely long time)
6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?
They were there and graduated fantasy high school what more do you want from them jkdxxjndk.  They started working at the local sweets shop after school, so no higher level of education here! They like history a bit, but that’s about it tbh!
8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals?
Yes! Echo had a pet cat back at Ivydome with her moms, and before the campaign she didn’t really have the money to keep another, so they settled for feeding and playing with the stray cats in Summervale.
10. Do they like children? Do children like them? Do they have or want any children? What would they be like as a parent? Or as a godparent/babysitter/ect?
Hmmm, Echo doesn’t mind children?? but there’s only so long they can be around them before she gets overwhelmed. Children like them well enough since Echo is always up for playing songs or messing around with cantrips. Echo would be the fun parent/godparent/babysitter, but. Please dont make them look after children they dont want any.
12. What is their favourite food?
Give my child spicy noodles or give him death
14. Do they have any specific memories of food/a restaurant/meal?
Their first cake made without supervision was. A disaster to put it lightly since someone was feeling ambitious.(it turned out like rubber and after that he was too flustered n frustrated to focus so everything else turned out badly too) So they dont bother with that anymore! Cake mistakes who i dont know her sdkjjkdbs. So half the time they pass by anything with some type of airy sponge cake they cringe lololol
16. Do they collect anything? What do they do with it? Where do they keep it?
She had a rock and shiny things collection back at Summervale! They’re mostly for decoration, although some with certain textures are used for stimming. Some rocks are kept on shelves, but most are stored in cool jars to save space
18. What’s their favourite genre of: books, music, tv shows, films, video games and anything else
Echo is a sucker for romance novels and fun, upbeat music! Idk if video games, films, or video games exist in-universe, but if they did, they’d like dramas and baking shows, rpgs, and more character focused games like nitw
20. Do they like musicals? Music in general? What do they do when they’re favourite song comes?
They love music, and they’d like musicals too! They will grab their lute and play along if their favorite song came on, and if nobody was around then maybe they’d sing too. Maybe. 
22. What are their favourite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back?
tbh their go-to insult is calling someone a prick or a bastard, and it’s usually for whenever someone’s done something particularly scummy. Or if someone is just. The Absolute Worst. It’s a leftover habit from when they used to live in Ivydome, but Echo usually sticks to talking shit when the target is. Very far away/not in the area.
24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress?
They try and get around six hours, to varying success, and to their knowledge they dont snore! Echo loves soft things and would prefer to sleep on a soft mattress with So Many blankets and pillows and maybe a cuddle buddy
26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions?
Fun fact echo does a tounge blep when she’s happy!! They tend to do lil happy claps and bounce up and down in place when they’re really excited, but when it’s a more calm-type of happy he purrs loudly and smiles a lot more than usual! 
28. What is their biggest fear? What in general scares them? How do they act when they’re scared?
He’s claustrophobic and is terrified of being alone again or having to leave people behind even when the situation calls for it. So like. He aint copin too well after the last session! They get very flustered and panicked and freeze when theyre scared
30. Do they exercise? Regularly? Or only when forced? What do they act like pre-work out and post-work out?
Does going on champion quests and running from his problems count as exercise or???
32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like?
Crop tops with long sleeves, shorts, and boots make up most of their wardrobe and they love it. Theyd go to like the fantasy equivalent of marshalls i think? Somewhere with good deals and a lot of options. Overlarge shirts, tank top crop tops, and more shorts make up their pjs. They dont really wear makeup, mostly bc they touch their face a lot and it feels weird the whole time, but they wouldnt be opposed to wear a lil bit every now and then! Their hair is floofy and a bit of a controlled mess since they cut it themselves
34. What is their body type? How tall are they? Do they like their body?
Echo is 5’9”/ 175.26 cm! Theyre on the average side i think? Like theyre not super skinny but not fat either so just. Avergae. And yeah, Echo likes their body, theyre so bright! And their horns are so cute and having a tail is very handy and claw maintenance can be a bit of a pain but like. Aesthetic am i right folks
36. What are they good at? What hobbies do they like? Can they sing?
Hes good at playing the lute and generally being very cute and giving out good vibes, and he likes baking and playing music! They can sing, but really only do that when theyre playing their lute ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
38. What do they admire in others? What talents do they wish they had?
Echo admires passion and creativity the most, and dont let anyone from the party know but he wishes he could be just. A bit smarter and know what to say + ask. Theyd also really like to be able to make a decent genoise sponge too like theyre not picky
40. Do they like energy drinks? Coffee? Sugary food? Or can they naturally stay awake and alert?
Theyre a tea drinker all the way, and arent the biggest fan of sweet things. He used to use more tart or mellow flavors when baking. They def arent alert after being tired for a while, and will space out a bit
42. What are their goals? What would they sacrifice anything for? What is their secret ambition?
No secret ambitions here, Echo is an open book(unless they roll high on deception dvdjxb)! Becoming Sune’s champion, making a decent sponge cake, and protecting his friends with his life/in any way they can are all their current goals. Echo doesn’t care too much if they get hurt, so physical well-being and maybe mental are things they wouldn't mind sacrificing, but as a whole they don’t really want to think about what they’d have to give up. He’ll burn that bridge when he gets to it. 
44. What is their favourite season? Type of weather? Are they good in the cold or the heat? What weather do they complain in the most?
If its cold, wet, or humid echo is not a happy camper lol. They prefer summer and the beginning of fall the most, and sunny days with lots of puffy white clouds are the best! They think its fun watching the clouds shadows on the ground. They’re better in hot weather than cold, since clothes for that type of weather are easier to dress for and they dont have to account for their tail or horns as much
46. Do they make a good first impression? Does their first impression reflect them accurately? How do they introduce themselves?
God i hope they make a good first impression im dying over here xjkxdk but honestly it depends! They try to make a good first impression and i think they usually do? But if theyve just finished with a job w the gang or theyre just. So tired they wont really introduce themselves at all.  Its pretty accurate of how they are, and their go-to greeting is “I’m Echo Barquiel, a pleasure to meet you dearie~” 
48. Do they enjoy any parties? If so what kind? Do they organise the party or just turn up? How do they act? What if they didn’t want to go but were dragged along by a friend?
In theory they’d like parties but being around so many people with that much noise for an unknown amount of time would not be. Ideal so smaller get-togethers with friends would be the most enjoyable! Echo doesnt really have the uh, space to host anything so theyd just turn up to other’s parties. Theyd be in a constant state of switching between ‘holy shit im so gay’ and ‘oh my god theres so many people/internal screaming’. If they were dragged to a party, theyd mingle for a leelte bit before stepping out
50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?
A bedroll, waterskin, food supplies, rope, knives, a lute, matches, money- yknow regular survival stuff!
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01010010-posts ¡ 5 years
Note
I have no idea if your requests are open but I just came up with a headcannon for the a/b/o au (or I think its a headcannon I'm sure someone else probably has come up with it) I know in some peoples aus omegas can purr, but I had the thought what if some omegas could also growl? And I what I was wondering was how do you think the alpha boys would react to their omega growling and how alpha reader would react to omega boys growling? (Sorry if this is long winded and doesnt make sense)
they are open just for things i find interesting! and headcanons are now mainly done on asks sorry but the request list is about ten pages on docs so :( the asks i’ve posted in the past days are all old bc im not always able to answer them right away! and i still have some!ahh don’t worry don’t be sorry!!! everything’s understandable and it’s a really cute thought too!! i don’t think anyone mentioned purring tho! it’s such a tender detail jdldkjljmhh let’s see, growling is something to assert dominance but uhh guess it can be done when scared or angry or aroused? of course since there’s no set situation i’ll uhh do some vagueposting?alpha!connor would be p surprised, his cute little omega growling? wow!!! he’s so proud of them,,,, he feels like a mom that has witnessed the first steps of his child. you’re baby. he’s the kind of stupid that would do tiny ‘growl’ sessions for his omega to exercise (if it’s not really a thing omegas do? idk really) where he growls along with you, since he’s supposedly more ‘experienced’. every neighbour is weirded out by the noises coming from your apartment.alpha!RK900 is honestly sold. like, he thought his omega couldn’t be more /perfect/ than this and YET. they can growl. what the fuck he finds it fucking cute he has to hold back from hugging you every single time you do it. and if you’re doing something & having a hard time with it and you start to silently growl out in frustration? he could faint bc you’re too lovely. he’s addicted. use it against him when he’s being too dumb.alpha!60 is delighted. no he doesn’t mean to laugh at you but his soft omega growling? that’s something he would never expect and it makes you more precious!! he compares you to a chick who’s trying to roar (gap moe?). which might only make you growl more,,,, surprise him by tackling his laughing ass to the mattress.omega!connor is a medium growler. no high pitched sounds or things like that. he actually doesn’t sound any different from when he’s talking. taking into account that he was built for blending in mhh i don’t think he’d be able to growl. but i guess deviancy can also mean this? ahahahah. but he’d be embarassed about being able to. so he’d def hide it until he’s ‘really feeling good’ and a growl would escape. of course he’d pretend it didnt happen but you both know you heard it. just approach the argument in a calm way and let him understand that you’re in no way judging him and he can feel at ease. he’ll relax and growl when he needs to in no time.omega!RK900 is the dumbest bitch alive no questions asked. he growls. he knows how to. a very loud and low one too. he does it bc altough he’s an omega he’s tall, broad and strong. and nobody’s going to protect his alpha better than him. no he doesn’t care about you being proud you’re his as he is yours which means you both protect each other. but he’s a robot so he protects you a little more. his fav actions are, in order: sighing, growling, purring with you while you cuddle him. jk that’s actually first. jk that’s actually at the same spot of sighing, he just sighs a lot. 60′s fault probably. and yours too sometimes >:)omega!60 is the second dumbest bitch alive and the first most emotional bitch ever. apart from that. his growl is very similar to connor’s. just a little more high pitched tho. he altered the original sound to make it more unique. copyrights reasons. he doesn’t mind the whole ‘omega aren’t supposed to growl’ fuck he deviated bc he could be his own person so uhh??? do you think he gives a fuck???? wrong think again you should know him by the time. he growls when he feels to without even putting much reason behind it. hope you like it. hope you like his whining bc he does that a lot too!!! needy babby who’s afraid of love
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starrysence ¡ 6 years
Note
chanting: SPAL BERT SPAL BERT SPAL BERT
what is???? spoon berry???? AKSJDJS IM KIDDING I LOVE SPALBERT HERE WE GO
warnings: mention of abuse + implied depression
×××
●ok so they both?? like? struggle w/ expressing their emotions verbally (spot a little more than albert), like in face-to-face conversation ▪modern era they wouldnt have a problem texting each other "ily" or "i love u" etc but they wont be able to say it out loud for a little while▪no problem showing physical affection tho●hoo boi are these boys physical▪what they lack in being verbal they make up for in kisses/hugs/hand holding/other stuff like that u know▪albert usually initiates physical contact bc he's so touch-starved▪when theyre both new to their relationship he does little things like hold spot's hand and trace shapes on the back of it ▪also draping his arm around spot's shoulders and running his fingers through his hair▪spot will never admit it but it drives him crazy●theyre both Very Athletic▪they just seem like the athletic type▪gonna be real i dont know SHIT about 99% of the sports on this planet so dont expect too much detail▪al loves track n dance and spot loves football▪actually al can run rlly fast it's kind of frightening▪extremely well defined muscles from dance▪def into ballet, modern, tap, jazz▪spot can hardly dance▪he knows ballroom dance bc of a class medda made him take and Thats It▪but hes really good at football▪works out. on the daily.▪al works out almost every day but some days he can barely bring himself to get out of bed and spot gets that▪al isnt one of those people who feels better after exercising bc he can barely get himself to do jt▪but he'll read a good book and listen to some nice music and thats his happy place▪sometimes he'll actually just pick spot up out of nowhere and nyoom y'know●a couple months into their relationship is when al tells spot hes adopted ▪spot is surprised bc al couldve told him earlier???? since he knows spot is adopted too▪but albert explains that he was scared bc telling someone hes adopted makes him feel like he has to tell them abt the shit his biological parents did to him
▪so spot tells him that he isnt being forced to talk about it if it makes him feel uncomfortable, and starts Panicking when albert starts crying▪hes all "did i say something wrong???" and albert shakes his head and just tells him that it means a lot that he said that▪now he is significantly ess Panicked▪and albert just like. pulls him into a hug and hes always down for that●neither of them like the snow very much●they stay inside wrapped in every blanket they can find in the house sipping hot chocolate with marshmallows in it and candy canes on the cup●spot is Ready to watch christmas movies on november 1st but al is in post-halloween denial and depression for at least the first 10 days of november▪it makes for a lot of arguments▪"i want to watch white christmas!!!!!!"▪"you can but i REFUSE"▪"can we look for a christmas tree-"▪"nOt YeT"▪spot would Actually Fight Al if he didnt love him so much●albert owns So Many sweaters▪spot does too but he loves to steal albert's▪"am i ever gonna get that back"▪"no probably not"▪"ok cool"●al is the first one to use a pet name▪spot gets really red and cant speak for like 3 minutes the first time albert calls him "babe"▪al is getting a LAUGH outta this hes never seen spot like this before▪"babe youre so cute when you blush oh my god"▪"sH ut up dasilva"▪"whatever you say babe"●spot is the first one to say "i love you"▪he gets really scared bc for a minute there albert is really quiet and just sitting there staring at his hands ▪but then he kisses spot so softly on the lips and spot's just like "o h" in the back of his mind▪and they both pull away after a few minutes and al is smiling really wide and he kisses spot's neck and whispers "i love you, too, spot"●al can bake▪spot Can Not▪spot's amazing at cooking tho▪but hes bitter bc so is albert▪it'll be al's turn to cook dinner one night and spot is eating a cookie from a batch albert baked earlier and hes just like "fuck you"▪"what?"
▪spot gestures to al with the half eaten cookie in his hand and speaks through a mouthful, "you can do both. it’s uNFAIR"▪al dies laughing ●uhhhh hh albert plays guitar and is way better at songwriting than he likes to admit ▪actually spot doesnt even know al writes song until he sees his songbook lying around and decides to look through it a lil▪he loves hearing al play with or without singing▪never hesitates to tell al how freakiNg good he sounds and albert blushes and smiles every time and replies "thanks" rlly softly▪it makes spot's heart melt. every damn time. and he cant help but just kiss his boy▪one time after al finishes playing a song he looks at spot and smiles and hes like "that one was about you"▪spot near CRIES▪ofc. kisses. he loves his bf so much▪eventually he has to be like "put the guitar away albert" so they can go further
●ngl albert proposes at 3am without entirely meaning to
▪like he has a ring n stuff but he was planning to propose on a cute date or something
▪but y'know they cant sleep so theyre in bed talking 
▪"you know what, spot?"
▪"what?"
▪"we should totally get married one day. like. it would be so cool. sean and albert conlon-dasilva"
▪"did you just. actually fucking propose to me at," he turns to check the clock and then turns back to face albert, "3:16 in the fucking morning"
▪albert turns around to grab the ring box out of his nightstand and turns back to face spot before opening it
▪".......yes"
▪what a disaster
▪spot loves him
×××
here u go juls!!!!!! this got really long ajshdsjs so i hope u like it
-sanj 💕
tag list:
@but-let-us-seize-the-day​
@one-candy-cane-please​
@suddenly-im-respecsable​
@intoomanyfandomstopickaname​
@be-more-chill-evan-hansen​
@aw-jus-let-em-try
@bencookisagod​
@well-the-kids-do-too​
@auspicioustarantula​
@spot-conlon-king-of-brooklyn​
@have-we-got-news-for-you​
@not-a-scab​
@newsiesgarbage​
@pineappapizza
@andthewoildwillknow​
@concrete--donuts​
@stopthe-presses​
@thomasbeingthomas
@i-love-loki-and-sherlock
@maxvanna
[if you want to be added to my tag list, please shoot me an ask or a message letting me know! i’ll be happy to add you.]
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themeed ¡ 4 years
Text
Daily Log 2.6
DW: 181.2
Calories: 864
Exercise: walking
Food: 2 tsp PB, RC, most of an egg, large frosty from a cute girl who gave it to me for free 👀 (most of the days cals at 580), a can of tuna, 13 g lowcal mayo
Notes: im. happy that i got a frosty from a cute girl but also not happy bc it was super high cal i kinda wish id given her my number or something her hair was gorgeous and she was cute??? ugh. but im not in any state to date rn i need Therapy. also. complicated relationship with sexuality and romance from being pan and poly and not really drawing those clear delineations for the inner circle and needing to be friends first bc trust issues and also needing to feel safe enough to like. stim with someone before intimacy if i plan to stick around and being ND and being uncomfy doing one night stands bc panorama and also No Pregnancy Please and self confidence issues and small enough community to run into people again esp the queer folk like me. holy SHIT what is my identity?????? NOT TO MENTION THE GENDER THING. GODS. AM I A BOY??? OR A GIRL??? I KNOW IM EITHER BOTH OR NEITHER BUT IT CHANGES AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO DEFINE THIS. ugh. i think im probably genderfluid nonbinary??? but gods its so hard. especially with shifting personas that may or may not be osdd but im in denial and dont want to expose myself to the people around me until i feel stable and safe in my identity. HOW MANY THINGS. GODS. i hope im just making it up but i also dont bc life is lonely and the guys bein able to take over while i recover from panik and direct and give opinions is nice. but fuck. no. thats not. normal.
Anyway I also unlocked a childhood memory today. Mom had done a thing and I was on the verge of crying or just finished I don't remember but I remember threatening/saying I was gonna call CPS or tell my teachers. Bc it was. really shitty and I Did Not Want To Live With Her At All And This Cemented That. and. she told me that the kids in the system had it way worse. that they were beaten and starved. and that if i did that. theyd take away my brother too, and i didnt want to do that to him did i?
And. I can appreciate that she was scared and being. as honest as she could. But that was a blatant fear tactic and emotional manipulation when I needed an acknowledgement that driving your child to tears regularly is not normal or okay. This was. Before I hit ten?? Well before puberty at least. Before the depression set in. But it bookmarked a growing sense of fear associated with her, and the seeds of the resentment and betrayal that marked the coming years. I'm sad and upset and angry that she did that. That she took it as a threat. That I DIDN'T tell someone. That she thought she was protecting herself and us but. The way she went about it. Proved that her priorities were not my health and wellbeing mentally or emotionally. Just physically. She needs to go to therapy. And so do I, but like. I'm. Very Upset. Gods. This is supposed to be a food diary but now it's an emotional one too. Whatever works.
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marvelandimagine ¡ 7 years
Text
New Beginnings (part two)
SO I am stupid rusty but I’m gonna take a swing at this bc I was bored at work and started reading my old fics and was like dang I kind of really like this one??
so basically plz take pity on me it’s been awhile LEAVE FEEDBACK AND I’LL LOVE U FOREVER this was gonna be a two part but it’s gonna be three oooOoooo the suspense
also tagging some lovelies from like a year ago who liked part one IM BACK YALL hope u lovelies see this and read lmk if it’s not trash<3 @nuvoleincielo @bengaligrl @wintersoldier9 @heatherpotter @deanskitten
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You glance down and beam at your stomach, eyes glistening with emotion. 
“You are quite possibly the best thing to ever enter my life.”
“Y/N, you are literally carrying our firstborn child right now.”
The table echoes with laughter as you grin at Bucky next to you, tousling his hair before shoveling a massive forkful of maple-glazed sweet potatoes into your mouth, the bowl balanced perfectly on your protruding belly.
You swallow and rub your stomach happily
“True, but they haven’t officially arrived yet! And besides,” you reply, shifting the tureen off you and replacing it with four buttered Hawaiian rolls nestled in a cloth napkin,
“What kind of mother would deny her baby the wonders of Thanksgiving? And Doc said I should be getting vitamin A in, so it’s a win-win.”
“Good listening,” Bruce says with a smile before moving to return to his plate casting a bemused look around the table at he catches Tony wolfing down a stolen scoop of stuffing.”
“All’s fair in love and Turkey Day, Banner.” 
While the science bros begin to banter, you tear off a piece of the sweet roll and pop it in your mouth, savoring the flavor that permeates your senses much more deeply thanks to the physical upheaval that is pregnancy. Despite all the tough parts about it, though, you have enjoyed what you’ve referred to as your “culinary Spidey senses.”
You pat your tummy, smiling as you feel a gentle shift beneath your fingers. Your fingers are soon joined by another, larger pair that interlaces with yours with ease, and you turn your smile toward your husband.
“What’s up?”
Bucky’s returned  smile comes and goes in a flash before adopting the look of concern that you’ve grown to love/hate these past nine months, causing you to take a deep inhale. After his previous trepidation and insecurity, you were thrilled that he had become so dedicated to impending parenthood -- reading books constantly, getting excited over baby clothes and toys and helping with the shower registry, designing and building the nursery with help from Stark -- but he was almost too involved at times, hovering over you like a mother hawk. It was sweet at first, but you had to put your foot down when he said he’d wait for you outside the bathroom. 
“I”M PREGNANT, NOT DISABLED, BUCK!” you had yelled down the hall in frustration. And while he backed off slightly, he still couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that something would go wrong, that he wouldn’t be able to be who you needed -- and who your child needed.
So, even with hormonal outbursts, you had been the mostly calm one in the pregnancy, consistently reassuring Bucky that you were ok and that he was being an absolutely wonderful source of support. So your own fears got pushed inward, knowing that while you had always dreamed of having your own baby, it was still a new dream for your husband -- and he was worried he would let both of you down.
But now, as you were due in mere weeks, those anxieties were bubbling to the surface.
Bucky lowers his voice in an effort to obscure his words under the din of chattering Avengers.
“You want to go lie down upstairs doon? I know you said you were feeling tired earlier and you need to stay rest-”
“You think I don’t know that?” you snap and Bucky looks taken aback at your tone, but his wounded look just angers you further, months of frustration pulsing in your veins. “Am I not allowed to sit and have 30 damn minutes of not worrying about vitamins or exercises or breathing or, you know, that I’m freaking out about probably needing a C-section and that any tiny choice I’ve made in the past nine months will have impacted our baby in ways we might not understand or know about for years?”
You realize that the voices around you have stopped, and it only makes the stinging in your eyes burn more, obscuring your vision until Bucky’s blue eyes are just blurs of color and your voice cracks from the strain.
“You don’t think every waking moment that I’ve had has been about wondering if I’m not doing enough, if I’m doing this right? But I can’t take one more second of being told what to do until I am there on that table. Especially from you -- and I’ve let you because I know it makes you feel better, but fuck, did you ever stop to think how I needed to feel better? That just because I had wanted this for a really long time doesn’t mean I’m not scared?”
The silence around the table sinks into you like stone while embarrassment and guilt flood your face. You stand up, pushing in your chair and wiping your eyes with the back of your hand.
Bucky comes back into focus and seeing the hurt on his face, hurt that you just gave because you couldn’t just suck it up for a few more weeks, pushed you over.
“I’m sorry,” you whisper, backing away from the table, roughly pushing in your chair and breaking into a half jog to the hall.
“Y/N, wait.”
Bucky’s gravelly tone wavers and it pushes you faster, even more as you hear his hurried steps behind you. With one hand on your stomach and the other reaching out for the key code, you fly into your room, scooping up a blanket from the floor and enveloping it around you, shutting out everything but your muffled sobs and the sudden kicks inside your own skin, this tiny pulse of life deepening your cries as you think about who you created with, and the look on his face when you, essentially, voiced what you knew he’d take as what he feared the most: that he wasn’t able to be there for you.
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whifferdills ¡ 7 years
Text
“World Enough and time” quicktakes:
fuck dudes what if the Xmas special is a “Caves of Androzani” thing where the Dr is basically dying the whole time. that'd explain the dramatic 'noooooo', bc this Dr Who i feel isn't a 10 Dr sort of, fuck you i need THIS ME to live, but in the context of 'i can't do the regeneration tango rn i have work to do' it makes sense
god i love generational ships. this ep doesn't quite nail it but i love that SF trope
MISSY. who is Doctor Who, with her plucky assistants/expendables. i am in love. "Think of the age gap" fuckin
"Nardole, do something non-irritating," says Dr Who, eating snacks. all my Twelvedole headcanons are basically canon now
"Time Lords are friends, everything else is cradle-snatching." you could do a meta on the Time Lord take on intimacy using that line alone.
Friends above all else. And the Dr and Missy are very, very old friends
"You're probably handsome, aren't you. Well congratulations on your relative symmetry." I love Missy ok
"And if I'm in the shower, just bring me some beans on toast. That's....that's roughly human flirting, right?" MISSY.
her accent ramping up on "this ridiculous exercise" right i just really love Missy
Dr Who's real name is Dr Who. the meta nods, i'm livin. "I'm cutting to the chase baby, I'm streamlining, I'm saving us ac-tu-al minutes." *dab* M I S S Y
"Are you eating?" yes, yes they are. luv this hungry boy
Nardole was Blue, once. what the fuck is Nardole
"Is this the emotion you call...spanking" holy shit Missy please i cant
i love how the Dr's speech is just cut off, it reminds me of - i think it's an Indiana Jones? where the one dude is like *dramatic sword flourishing* and the other dude just straight-up shoots him
like i know it'll end up ok but BILL NO. this moment doesn't quite feel earned - like maybe if more of the writers had really used her? but it kind of just feels shitty and cheap. horrifying, but it woulda landed better if she'd been more present beforehand. see also: how "Heaven Sent" woulda worked better if Clara hadn't been fridged or off away wherever i really wish we'd had more 12&Bill moments. i love what we get here, just that shoulda happened all season
nice kitchen. looks like an Aalto-Shaam and a salamander, plus fryer and misc. decent set-up for a college cafeteria.
"What's so special about her?" "I don't know." "Yes you do." "Are you having an emotion?" See THIS is what i want this Team TARDIS to be and i'm so mad we're only getting it now
Twelvedole is canon tho look @ these 2 obnoxious boys
and fuck that scene w/ 12 and Bill just chatting about crushes i wish we'd had more of that
i feel like 12 has eaten more on camera than any other dr who, i am here for this hungry boy who drops chips on their lap
"she was my man-crush - I think she was a man back then" all the gender-misc sexuality-misc stuff yes YEs like sure it's clumsy but it's CANON
"but you still call yourselves Time...Lords." "Yeah shut up." seriously why did we not get more of 12 and Bill hanging out
the PACT to see ALL OF THE STARS anyway Best Enemies is real
i love Bill admitting that she's scared, and doing the thing anyway. Bill in a nutshell right there
oh GOD the body-horror of the Cybermen and the VOICES uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhghghgwaghfgejf nope
"Wait for me" oh way to use hope to fuck someone up again. why, why dude
on first watch i did not at all suspect that this dude is the Master in disguise, i’m a dum-dum
so this hurts more on re-watch
and after input from smarter people - the disguise the Master uses is sort of...like it edges into a hinky area. dunno if it's anti-semetic as such (im not an expert, just it feels fucky on second viewing) but it does flirt with those tropes a lot and w h y would you go there
ffffffuck the converted people just screaming out best they can that they're in pain, and then being silenced. this is for me probs the most directly horrifying thing DW has done since, idk, "Midnight"? been a while, anyway. fuck, dudes
so i know it's the Master now but i do really love the relationship Bill has with Master-In-Disguise. it's a trick, a trap, but it also feels almost...genuine. they have a dynamic, Bill believes in it and i'd be almost be willing to believe the Master does too, despite themselves
Nurse Ratched continues to terrify audiences. the self-assured evil-nurse trope, like. is it cheap? yes. is it fucking me up? also yes. (my favorite aunt is a nurse, i’ve had a lot of - like not good experiences, but experiences where the nurses saved the day best they could; i love nurses but ALSO this trope ok ok ok aw geez)
the body-horror in this episode continues to be OFF THE CHARTS like this is as if someone asked me 'what deeply upsets you' and then they made an episode about it holy fuck
why's Dr Who fucking around for so long if they already know the bottom is much faster and Bill's down there for years like fuck off, be succinct, cough it up. 12 is every waiter i've ever dealt with as expo like - just FUCKING SAY WHAT YOU NEED don't dick around
i do really love Bill here. that mix of needing to leave and wanting to stay, or vice versa
V E N U S I A N  A K I D O. they've got hidden talents and hidden arms
the graphics in this episode are nice that black hole is nice somebody put some work in there
speaking of the assets - Murray Gold nearly on a Phillip Glass tip here. that sort of dissonant orchestral thing. you could rescore this with the soundtrack to Koyaanisqatsi, easily
god that Cyberman voice is...so upsetting. again, always. fuck that shit. this does have a big Spare Parts vibe, with the dying world trying to save itself and the semi-volunteers. it's not quite as emotionally crushing as Spare Parts but it does angle towards that whole...yknow
"aw, sorry mate, guess what I'm about to do" like even knowing what he is, what this situation is, this is such a pure Bill moment and i love it
DONT U DARE DO ANYTHING TO BILL I SWER
but fuck dudes this is ultra horrifying this is so bad and i like it bc i'm confident it'll end up ok but god oh god oh no Bill i wish that hadn’t happened
Missy/Master sure is a thing. i'm really hoping Missy is stronger than that now, better than that now
fuck my emotions are all over the place
A  M O N D A S I A N  C Y B E R M A N
that Master reveal was straight out of Classic Who
"You've met the ex" / "I waited for you" oh shit oh no
NEXT TIME: my soul dies, everything is bad, aw fuck
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swearronchanel ¡ 8 years
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6.08, my last commentary™ R I P to me
I wanted to post this right away but my phone died and I broke my charger so I had to handle that but now I’m finally able to. I’m literally dead, I STILL can not process how amazing it was. So I’ll just get on with it post my earlier thoughts  
ÂĄÂĄTODAY IS THE DAY AHH!! IM FREAKING LATE KILL ME
BUT HOW ARE WE ALREADY HERE? IM NOT READY FOR THIS SERIES TO END BUT I NEED TO SEE SHELGAH *SAFELY* GIVE BIRTH TO A HEALTHY BABY. ANYWAY IM LITERALLY GOING TO DIE AFTER THIS EPISODE SO ENJOY THE FINAL THOUGHTS OF MY LIFE, LETS GET IT ..
MY HEART IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE ITS BEATING SO FAST
TBH I MIGHT SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST
SCREW THESE CREDITS BUT I NEED THEM BC IM NOT READY OMG
IM SCREAMING
aw baby! & hey val
Does this mean Delia had No letters from pats this whole time??
MY BBY SHELAGH OMG HER BELLY
SHE CANT REACH HER SHOE OMG SO PRECIOUS THOUGH
Sister MJ I love u 😭😂
Family planning clinic!
YES VAL! they’re women not criminals !!
YES TRIXIE THANKS BBY FOR SPEAKING UP
aww poor Barbara
“..There are tales of missionaries served for luncheon in those climes” LMAO OMG SISTER MJ THATS NOT WHAT SHE NEEDS TO HEAR RIGHT NOW
It’s so sweet that Babs really wants her dad, I feel. My grandfather officiated my parents’ and brother’s wedding, I hope he does mine. If someone wants to marry me one day ofc lol 😂😭
SHELAGH IS ACTUALLY YELLING .. WHY DO I LOVE IT?
All the shit she’s been through/delt with and pregnancy sets her off huh..
BUT TRIXE AND SHEALGH INTERACTING YESS NOT THE WAY I WANTED BUT ILL TAKE IT FOR NOW
AWW MY BBY CRYING SOMEONE HUG HER 😭😭💕💕
MY BBY TRIXIE IS SMIRKING AT MY OTHER BBY LOL STOP 😭😭💔
“Hot and bothered” 😭😂 Violet having hot flashes. That’s not funny but i giggled I’m sorry immature of me
I can’t imagine being around when the pill was just coming out(or antibiotics even) like that must have been so wild ? you really would think they were magic *remember Vanessa Redgrave saying that in series 2?*
my mom is a nurse at a gyn/fertility office and she informed me of so much at a young age lol maybe that’s why I’m so curious idk?
lol I remember being like 13 and my friends didn’t know there was more than just the pill when it came to birth control and I really felt I was an expert😂 but *a judge’s voice* irrelevance moving on.
Needing your husbands permisson for a bank account? *sucks teeth* Vete ya!
Aw my bby shelagh 💔💔😭
“And I’ll warrant you’ve never felt more scared” I AM! AND THIS ISNT EVEN MY FICTIONAL PREGNANCY
“Oh lass“😭 PHYLLIS COMFORTING HER OMG I AM CRYING ALREADY, I NEVER KNEW I WANTED THIS
"Phyllis you’ve been a real friend” IM NOT OKAY OMG, THEY’VE COME SO FAR I CRY
OMG SHELAGH BEING SO CUTE WTF OMGGG 💖
PROTECT MY BBY & HER BABY AT ALL COSTS 💕💕
THE NONNATUNs CHEERING SO PURE 😭
“What if something goes wrong?” stop tempting fate Patrick !!
“I’ve made up my mind” MY BBY I CANT DEAL .. once upon a time she couldn’t speak up and was so timid 😭 my bby has grown
Her lipstick is a nice color, wait what’s this lady’s name?
The nurses all together makes me so happy omg why is this so adorable, even Phyllis is there !! SO PURE💕
Lol poor Fred tries his best !
Damn secondment to st Cuthberts, I guess Trixie couldn’t even be considered for to be Shelagh’s midwife
SHELAGH IN THE CARDIGAN >>
OF COURSE SHE CHOSE SISTER JULIENNE WE WOULDN’T HAVE ACCEPTED IT ANY OTHER WAY
“‘MY DEAR” BRB DROWNING IN TEARS
but omg was Phyllis disappointed 😭 no don’t be hurt that’s her basically her mother! (sister j and Phyllis would’ve been a good tag team though)
this montage just reminds me brb #irresponsibleme
Future Hereward’s take a note from the Turners, find out about each other sooner rather than later
LOL TOM’S AWKWARD FACE BC BABS IS GETTING CONTRACEPTION
it’s Wilma! her name is Wilma, noted.
Lol what does she sell? Is the company like Avon ? 😂I’m confused but also screaming too much internally
poor Babs is so nervous and feeling awkward 😂
Her face while on the bed😂 I feel
LMAO BABS TAKING OUT THE DIAPHRAGM & DROPPING IT HA
BUT WAIT THAT WAS THE TURNERS BATHROOM WTF ??
Patrick putting on or tying Shelagh’s shoes my fucking heart is melting
She doesn’t want him there .. for now?
“..We’re a team” 😭😭💕💕 marriage goals
“The minute I look at you I’ll give you everything you ask for” BRB I AM INDEED GOING TO SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST
I CAN NOT DEAL
Phyllis exercising 😭😂
“I have chosen one of my friends” OMG MY HEART
PHYLLIS BE MY BRIDESMAID !??
why does she only have one though? is it more like a maid of honor?
HERES COME MORE TEARS
THE SPANISH AYE DIOS MI CORAZON
Aw good for Wilma being happy with her job! Does everyone call the sofa the settee?
There’s that babycham! Still was never sure if it was alcoholic or nah? sparkling cider maybe?
OMG I HAVE A BOTTLE IN MY BAG THAT I BROUGHT FROM FLORIDA
new drinking came, shots every time the show makes you cry lol jk i’d be on the floor 20 mins in 
that sports car aye
My bby looking good 😍😍
she knows what it’s like to be hurt Christopher😭
You’re not supposed to take 3 at a time Wilma, I’ve been scolded enough
Okay so Babs just fell asleep and that’s all?? Preview made it seem more dramatic
Now is Val going to listen and not touch anything? lol probably
Violet always rocking blue eyeshadow haha
Is that a silicone faja?? that looks hella uncomfortable
TRIXIE’S FACE OF DISGUST HAHA
OMG THE FAM HELPING OUT WITH FUNDS MY HEART
I WANT TO BE APART OF THE NONNATUS FAMILY!
PHYLLIS AND BABS DRESS SHOPPING I LOVE THIS
“.. she’ll have me to reckon with”  TE QUERIO MUCHO PHYLLIS
I NEED A PHYLLIS IN MY LIFE
SHE HAS A FAV DRESS OMG I LOVE HER
HER FACE OMG I NEED THAT SCREENSHOTTED
SHELAGH MY BBY😭😭
Their new bedroom is so 60s I love it
She still didn’t read the pamphlet !! I love her omg, such pure intentions
OMG SISTER J REMINISCING, AH FINALLY SOME ACKNOWLEDGEMENT THAT SHE WAS A NUN, I AM SOBBING BYEE IM DYING. MY HEART RATE IS SLOWING DOWN
POOR DEELS AW OMG she doesn’t deserve this, she barely has screen time don’t hurt her 
Shealgh’s got another nightgown! 1962/2017 is apparently the year of nighties #thebrinylonforthewinthough
I love pink waffers 😭😂
SHIT WHAT’S WRONG WITH WILMA IM SCARED, IS IT A HEART ATTACK?? BLOOD CLOT??
poor vi!! aww she misses reggie too!
AW FRED HUG HER
and he’s fanning her omg so pure
SHEALGH’S GOING IN TO LABOR ?? AHHHHH OMGG IM NOT READY
but also she has a housecoat how cute
SISTER J SAID “HIS SPINE” OMG HOW DOES SHE KNOW ALREADY
“I knew it” bless u bby😭😭 she is a GEM. WHY IS SHE SO LOVABLE?
omg Wilma don’t die, Trixie can u save her 😭
shit not looking good, maybe this was the death they meant
shelagh throwing up yikes
“She’s smiling and waving” yea we know that smiling and waving😂😂 but omg doesn’t this remind anyone of when you’ve been partying too hard but you’re trying to convince your friends that you’re not ready to tap out yet😂😭
if not nevermind I’ll feel trashy lmaoo
PASS THAT GAS AND AIR SISTER J
AW BBY YOU ARE BRAVE!!!!!!!
IM CRYING BUT RUNNING OUT OF TEARS
HOW TF DOES LAURA LOOK GORGEOUS ALL SWEATY AND IN TEARS WHILE PRETENDING TO BE IN LABOR?? & i’m still a creature?
Poor Patrick! He must be going as crazy as I am!
I DONT HAVE ASTHMA BUT I NEED AN INHALER BC I CANT BREATHE IM SO ANXIOUS OMG
IM NOT A SMOKER BUT I FEEL LIKE I NEED A CIGG BC IM ABOUT TO LOSE IT
Trixie is doing Wilma’s makeup omg I can’t take this 😭💔💔
“I can’t believe I used to dream of this” OMG SHELAGH & SISTER J
“Every woman alive is the sum of all she ever did, and felt, and was.” ..“and how do you know that?” ..“ i wasn’t aware that I did until just now”
ÂĄÂĄÂĄIM A W R E C K!!! l o v e that
SHE IS SINGING DORIS DAY’s SECRET LOVE AND I AM F*CKING DEAD GOODBYE
PATRICK SINGING ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DOOR SOMEONE SEND H E L P IM DYING I BET IT’S “THEIR SONG” & YOU ARE ALL CORDIALLY INVITED TO MY FUNERAL IMMEDIATELY AFTER THIS EPISODE  
I’M NOT GONNA MAKE IT
“We can’t just be like any other couple.. because we’re us”
MY HEART WTF I SWEAR IT IS ABOUT TO BURST BUT IT’S NOT BEATING
IM DEAD INSIDE AND MY BODY WILL FOLLOW WHEN THIS IS OVER
Get in there Patrick!
“The children are here” .. to say goodnight omg no😢
OMG PATRICK HOLDING HER I AM FUCKING SCREAMING
“YOU CLEVER GIRL” OMGG WHO CALLED IT
I CANT SEE WHATS HAPPENING TOO MANY TEARS IN MY EYES
IT’S A BOY I KNEW IT WELL I HAD A FEELING !
BABYTURNERLAND 2.0!!!! QUE LINDO DIOS TE BENDIGA 💖👼🏼
WHAT IS HIS NAME???
THIS IS THE BEST EPISODE OF MY LIFE WOW I CANT PROCESS IT ALL
“May the lord bless you and keep you” OMGGG, JESUS HEIDI WTF ARE YOU DOING TO ME ??!! I’ve never been so invested in a show or fictional characters’ lives like this 😭😭
I NEVER THOUGHT WE’D SEE THIS DAY AND IM HAVING SO MANY FEELS, I BARELY HAVE ANY THOUGHTS I AM S h o o k, I AM NOTHING IN THIS WORLD. JUST USELESS TRASH FOR CTM
WELL, ALMOST 19 YEARS OF LIVING WAS GOOD ENOUGH RIGHT?
HONESTLY JUST PUT ME IN THE GARBAGE BC I HAVE NOTHING OF SUBSTANCE TO SAY IM JUST GUSHING AND DYING
BUT SERIOUSLY LAURA MAIN IS I N C R E D I B L E AND DESERVES EVERY AWARD SO PLEASE GET IT TOGETHER @ THE EMMYS, THE SAGS, THE GOLDEN GLOBES & ALL OTHER AWARDS OF ALL PRESTIGE!!  STOP PLAYING GAMES & GIVE LAURA + CTM THE RECOGNITION IT DESERVES  !! & no excuses it happened for downton!
NO WILMA IS DEAD NO
The pill is so great and useful and miraculous in a way but I’m glad they showed some of its issues but DID THEY REALLY HAVE TO KILL THE FIRST WOMEN THEY GAVE IT TO? I’m still here tho, I’m rolling
NO TOM DONT SAY THaT WTF? TRIXIE IS OVER U AND U ARE OVER HER don’t ruin the moment
why did I think bab’s dad was the rev Applebee Thornton 😭😂😂😂?? where’s Jane lol
My bby trixie serving looks as always 😍😍
Aw his daughter is cute
CHRISTOPHER LOOKS GOOD TOO UGH😍
What are knickerbocker glories?
lol Boots! lowkey want to go there to satisfy my 15 year old self who liked to watch British youtubers affordable makeup videos (tbh I still do when I’m bored)
REGGIE! OMG HE CALLED VI MUM I DIE
OH YEA THE WEDDING OMG LOL I DONT FORGOT FOR A SEC
IM STILL SCREAMING, MY FREAKING BBY JUST HAD A MIRACLE BABY !!!!! I LEGIT RAN OUT OF TEARS WHAT DO I DO
LOOK HOW FAR WE HAVE COME MY GOD
THE GIRLS SINGING “HAPPY WEDDING DAY” TO BABS OMG THAT WAS GREAT, I NEED FRIENDS LIKE THAT
I NEED TO WATCH THIS AGAIN AND IT DIDNT FINISH YET
LMAO TOM AND FRED HUNGOVER, relatable AF😂😭
SO IS TOM’S SURPRISE IS MONEY? Or is he going to buy her something!?
Barbara’s cape reminds me of Phoebe’s from FRIENDS
The stain glass !! love it
PHYLLIS LOOKS SO ADORABLE OMG HER BOUCLE SUIT AW
WHY A HEADBAND ON YOUR WEDDING DAY BABs? BUT good for them lol 😭 I don’t care enough at the moment  but let them be happy they’re so great for each other !
HE GOT A FUCKING CAROUSEL OMG
damn. Nice one Tom. I’m a little jealous, someone needs to love me like that.😭
“At times, the present seems most perfect when it seeds lie in the past. And others, life is rendered flawless when we look towards future, glimpsing from within one golden moment all the joys the days to come might hold” 💕😢😭
THE TURNERS, NOW A FAMILY OF 5 OMGGGGGGG 😭😭
THE NUNS SO PURE ❣️ lol obviously
“We can not stand still because the world keeps turning. Every year must give way to the next and it’s stories must be folded, tucked away like children’s clothes outgrown, cherished and never quite forgotten”
VANNESSA ALWAYS SAYS THE RIGHT THINGS UGH
Aw Angela with Tim!
My BBY SHELAGH IN HER BLUE OUTFIT WITH UNNAMED BABY TURNER ID CRY IF I COULD
“1962 was a year of great change at Nonnatus House, but there’s always change, everywhere, there are always new faces, new tears to shed, new joys to invest in , yet the circle of love is not broken, it expands.” YOU GOT THAT RIGHT🙏🏼👏🏼🙌🏻😭😭😢😢💖💖
I NEED THE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL LIKE TOMORROW PLEASE
lol Val screaming it’s snowing 😭 same
PATSY!!!
SHE AND DELIA KISSED OMG
GOOD FOR THEM 😭
ALSO GOOD FOR ME bc I was tired of the same complaints that BBC broke them apart and Patsy was “sent away” nah man Emerald was busy!
“Love bares all things, love believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things and love never ends”
THIS WAS INCREDIBLE WOW IM A MESS
IF I DIDNT KNOW THEY WERE COMMISSONED FOR 3 MORE SERIES I’D THINK THIS WAS THE END??
BUT UGH NOW WE MUST WAIT
ANYWAY I SEE THE LIGHT FOLKS
IDK IF THIS IS HELL OR HEAVEN BUT I AM DEAD, I SEE THE EARTH BEHIND ME
TBH ITS PROB HELL
Someone throw me in the damn ground already!!
In loving memory of Gabby Nuñez (1998-2017) taken far too soon because of the emotional toll brought by call the midwife, she didn’t choose to get so emotionally invested it just happened. She is grateful for her time on earth, you may leave comments, flowers or send money. Thank you for putting up with her nonsense and foolishness *now someone give my eulogy & someone else may come up and sing a hymn to conclude*
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i-read-good-books ¡ 8 years
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Expomise Chapter 6!
I updated Expomise!
Summary: 
“It’s really good to see you, Victor. Love the hair.”
His friend flushes, “Y-yes, I thought so, too.”
For a moment, they just kind of stand there, in silence, not really knowing what to say. Yuuri wants to tell him to come in again, wants to ask how Chris and Georgi are doing, wants to reach out and touch him, like he always does.
Except… he doesn’t.
Link to ao3: here
Chapter under the cut:
“I am a strong, independent wizard who needs no man,” Yuuri whispers to himself, clutching his scarf close to his chest. “This is fine.”
“Yuuri?” Luke’s voice reaches him just as he’s finishing lacing up his skates, as cheerful as always. “We’re waiting for you here!”
“...Coming,” he calls back weakly, straightening himself up and turning to glance backwards. The Coaches who have hours in the mornings are on the ice, carefully guiding beginners and lecturing some more experienced skaters, all of which look half-asleep still, clinging to the barriers and groaning every few minutes of exhausting exercise.
Luke, of course, is also there; because the universe just hates Yuuri that much that it didn’t have enough making him anxious and terrified of squirrels. He’s at the short door that opens up to the ice, beaming at him, wearing his colourful pink beanie and the tightest leggings Yuuri’s ever seen (and he’s a ballet dancer). “Slide in, big boy.”
Yuuri flushes as he’s making his way towards him, wincing at the sound the blade make against the ground, even if it’s protected against them, “Please don’t call me that, Luke.”
“Aw,” the teenager pouts, in a way  so unnecessarily dramatic that it reminds Yuuri of Phichit. “But aren’t you such a big, strong boy?”
“I’m thi- almost fourteen,” he splutters, not meeting his eyes. “And I’ve got class now, you know.”
“You were so much nicer to me at the beginning,” Luke smiles, gently moving so that they’re skating together towards where the  Coaches are. Yuuri only has morning classes like these on weekends, since he mostly uses the rink alone with Celestino during the afternoons, to practice his magic, and he’s changed his rink from last year, so he’s still a bit unfamiliar with the rest of the adults there. That means nothing when it comes to Luke, though, he practically lives here.
Yuuri met Luke last year, at the open ice rink during Christmas, and Luke told him he had talent.
“He was scared of you at the beginning,” Yuuko pipes in, happily coming to a stop in front of them. She’s the reason Yuuri changed rinks this year, to one further away from his home, which he has to Floo to. It’s close to Minako’s, though, so he makes the trip count.
“He couldn’t be,” Luke gasps, “I’m so undeniably pleasant.”
He smiles at Yuuri as he says so, taking a moment to rub his shoulders in a friendly way, the same kind of ‘big brother’ affection he loves showering Yuuri in, and his blue eyes shine.
For a moment, Yuuri can’t breathe properly.
“Come on, Yuuri,” Yuuko grabs his hand, “We have to practice together! That’s why we’re rinkmates. You can try holding me up.”
“Yuuko, that’s dangerous - “
“Gotta go, bye!”
Honestly? She’s just saved him from completely humiliating himself by trying to speak to Luke normally. It’s basically impossible.
…
Yuuri is um, he’s pretty sure he kinda, um… he kinda likes Luke.
It’s not a big deal! And it’s not like Yuuri is like, totally lusting after him or falling in love with him, either. Luke is just really handsome, and nice, and smiles a lot, and holds his hand when he trips on ice, and says his skating is good, and -
Well. Luke is um. He’s a cool guy, okay? Anyone would have a small crush on him, he’s got that special charm that makes people flock to him like birds. Mari teases him about it all the time, to his absolute horror. Whenever she comes pick him up at the ice rink she makes a show out of calling out Luke’s name, asking how Yuuri’s done, and smiling blindingly the whole way through, ecstatic.
“I hate you so much,” Yuuri groans as they exit the place, burying his face in his hands. “Why can’t you let me be?”
“Oh, was I bothering you two?” Mari presses the back of her palm against her forehead, mock-ashamed. “I never meant to interrupt your romantic encounters. But you can’t blame me, the last time you had a crush was on that one girl who lives across the street.”
“He’s like, your age,” Yuuri whines, pushing her so that she moves quickly. He’s almost certain Luke can’t hear them, but it’s better to make sure. Just in case. “And I don’t like him!”
His sister hums noncommittally, “Yes, of course. Whatever helps you sleep at night, Yuuri.” She smirks, “Or whatever helps you at night, even if you don’t actually sleep.”
“Oh my god - I can’t believe - I am going to murder you -” His cheeks are flaming red. Did she just imply…?
Mari holds her hands up, “You’re almost fourteen, little bro, I wasn’t born yesterday.”
Yuuri glares at her, hoping his blush isn’t as noticeable as he thinks, “Well, you tease like a two-year-old, so it’s an easy mistake.”
“Oi!” she punches him in the arm lightly, cackling when he yelps. “No badmouthing your sister because you get hot over an older guy!”
“Please kill me,” Yuuri begs to no one in particular.
Of course, Phichit’s reaction to the “news” (Yuuri awkwardly mumbling, “I think I have a crush on a guy at my ice rink.” during one of their nightly Skype calls, feeling like his heart’s about to burst out of his chest) is much different, and almost endearingly Phichit-like.
First, he tells Yuuri that under no circumstances is he to try to date the guy, as if.
“He is much older than you, Yuuri!” he waggles his finger threateningly on his laptop’s screen. “And a guy who hasn’t already asked you out on a date after seeing you in your ice skating glory doesn’t deserve you, anyway. Besides,” he seems especially insistent in this part, “I think you already have some very, very dateable people around you. You don’t need this boy.”
“I’m not going to date him,” Yuuri whispers harshly, checking around to make sure his parents haven’t woken up. No sound from their bedroom. “I was just telling you because it’s been driving me mad. Now that I’ve actually told someone, I can forget him!”
“Oh, no,” Phichit smiles, “You ain’t forgetting Luke Matthews anytime soon, buddy, but well. He’s your type, isn’t he? Gorgeous blond hair, endless blue eyes, smooth pale skin, and that smile, dear lord.”
Yuuri’s eyes widen, “Phichit, how do you know what he looks like?”
“How do you think?” he raises an eyebrow. “I just followed him on Instagram, obviously.”
“Phichit, unfollow him right now or I swear I will cut off your wifi.”
His friend winks, “We’re not in Hogwarts, my dear Yuuri.” He laughs at Yuuri’s dismayed expression of realization, and settles back in his chair, his smile widening. Phichit’s gotten a haircut recently, a nice one that makes his eyes stand out more. “How’s the summer coming along otherwise, cute boy notwithstanding?”
Yuuri bites his lower lip in thought, running his fingers through his hair, “Um. I’m getting more and more into skating, actually. I might be able to do a proper competition jump soon, other than waddling through my Salchow. Yuri’s been hinting at wanting to try my mom’s katsudon, so I’m probably gonna invite him over sometime soon.” He thinks about it, “Might invite Victor, too, while I’m at it.”
“Oh yeah, you do that.” Phichit nods, and then he lets out a small laugh, “Don’t tell him about Luke, though.”
“I wasn’t going to,” Yuuri rolls his eyes, “I’m not that stupid, you know, I’d already figured he might be jealous.”
His friend stares at him, mouth hanging open, “You had? Um, w-when?”
“Like, the first day?” Yuuri sighs. “Victor’s really nitpicky about anyone teaching me figure skating, he gets all petty every time Yuuko helps me with anything. Do you think I’d tell him about an older guy with more experience giving me lessons?”
For some reason, Phichit looks almost like he’s about to laugh again, his eyes twinkling, but he just says, giggling, “Yes, I’m pretty sure Victor would object to an experienced guy giving you private lessons, Yuuri.”
He crosses his arms over his chest, huffing at his friend, “Honestly, you treat me like I’m so dumb. Obviously I’d realized Victor is a protective teacher.”
“Very protective teacher,” Phichit agrees, smirking suspiciously.
…
yuuri katsucky (because you SUCK)
i dont know what u wanted me to do. like. do u want to like. poison the food or smth. i dont care tbh. im going to ur house anyway bc im invincible. so fuck u who cares tbh
nikiforov says hes going too but meh.  whatever
Yuri always writes such nice things.
Knowing that both Yuri and Victor are coming means that Yuuri spends the day before their arrival cleaning every corner of the house, meticulously making sure his parents don’t leave anything...incriminating (like the one teen Witches’ Fave Hottie: Victor Nikiforov! poster he bought because he was curious) around, and peering over their shoulders as they cook and wrinkling his nose if they put their feet on the table.
“Seriously, you’d think you were the adult,” his mother mutters, ruffling his hair while he works on his summer homework. His parents make him see a tutor to keep him updated on muggle school work, in case he doesn’t want to work in the wizarding world. Mom still thinks that the fact that they don’t study biology at Hogwarts is a crime against humanity.
He’s still fretting, fixing his clothes, the moment he hears the doorbell ring.
The first thing that Yuuri thinks when he opens the door, smiling, calling out to his parents, “They’re here!”, and sees the two Slytherins waiting outside for him is that, no matter how much he sometimes feels like Celestino is working him to death, it’s nothing compared to Feltsman.
It’s less noticeable in Yuri, who’s grumbling, wearing respectable clothes for once (although his earrings are tiger claws, of course), because the boy still looks almost eerily like a fairy, lean and skinny in a way that suggests elegant rather than ‘awkward’. But it’s undeniable the second he glances at Victor.
Victor babbled about ‘starting to really train’ for Junior Worlds after he came clean to Yuuri regarding it, delighting him with schedules upon schedules of what he had to do this summer to get up to bar in order to compete internationally. He even confessed that he may not write as many letters, with all the stuff he had to do, apologizing profusely. So Yuuri was expecting him to gain a little muscle and all but, um. They haven’t seen each other in almost two months, and the change is just a little bit striking.
His hair’s longer, almost reaching down to his back now, but he’s got it on the side, tied up in a stylish ponytail. Apart from that, all the differences are the fact that Yuuri’s pretty sure Victor’s grown at least ten centimeters since he last saw him, which finally cements his position as ‘the short friend’, something he’s been able to avoid with Phichit, thankfully. He also just seems more filled out; his shoulders are a bit further apart, his face is slightly skinnier, and he stands with more confidence, balancing his weight like he’s making an entrance.
“Hey, Yuuri,” Victor says, smiling.
He reminds Yuuri, just slightly, of Luke.
“Your voice is deeper,” he blurts out automatically, even though it’s not that big of a change, after taking in the rest. He flushes, embarrassed, and doesn’t meet his eyes, “Oh, sorry, uh, come in, you two, we’re expecting you!”
Yuri rolls his eyes, “Always collected, Huffle.”
Yuuri pokes his nose as he goes by, laughing at his infuriated yelp, “It’s good to see you, Yuri.”
“Don’t steal any paintings,” Victor tells him cheerfully, which makes him glower so bad that Yuuri’s kind of impressed he doesn’t back down. He turns to look at Yuuri again, “How have you been?” Victor bites his lip and fidgets with his hands, glancing at him from between his eyelashes, “I’m really sorry I haven’t been able to write much recently, Yakov’s been running me down.”
“Um,” Yuuri swallows. Were his eyelashes really that long before? “Oh, um, it’s fine. You already told me about it, you know.” He smiles back at him,“It’s really good to see you, Victor. Love the hair.”
His friend flushes, “Y-yes, I thought so, too.”
For a moment, they just kind of stand there, in silence, not really knowing what to say. Yuuri wants to tell him to come in again, wants to ask how Chris and Georgi are doing, wants  to  reach out and touch him, like he always does.
Except… he doesn’t.
“Yuuri?” his mom’s voice, coming from the kitchen, interrupts his train of thought. He startles, turning back. “Don’t leave your friend at the door, it’s rude.”
“Sorry, mom,” he mumbles, chastised. “Oh, so, you have to take your shoes off, see…”
…
Yuri and Victor meeting his parents goes extraordinarily well. Yuuri was slightly worried that Victor would say something accidentally offensive (one can never be sure with purebloods. Phichit, in his search for knowledge, innocently asked Yuuri when they were 11 if muggles took showers, too.), or that Yuri would burn the house down or something (one can never be sure with Yuri Plisetsky), but they come out of it mostly unscathed.
“So, Victor,” his mom sets down her fork and looks at his friend, smiling. “Yuuri has been telling us about you since forever. It would be truly nice to see you figure skate.”
Victor preens, leaning back in his chair before answering, turning on the ‘pureblood charm’. It’s a term that Leo and Yuuri made up after spending so much of their time around old, rich purebloods: however ridiculously awkward they may seem around their friends, regardless of their gross quirks and hand gestures, they turn into something like wizarding debutantes in the presence of any respectable adult, channeling thousands of gala nights into perfect table manners, unbelievable skilled public speaking and just the right amount of compliments.
Yuuri thinks it’s kind of silly, but undeniably useful for some situations. Leo calls it “Phichit trying not to seem Phichit”. Yuri has another name for it: “pretentious pampering”.
“Well, Mrs. Katsuki,” Victor closes his eyes briefly, beaming at her, “I’m sure that Yuuri has exaggerated my abilities. You see, he’s a very biased friend, although I do appreciate it.”
His mom smiles, “Oh, you’re so well-spoken, what a treasure.”
Yuri, who’s said a total of 10 words during the duration of the meal and is currently shoving katsudon into his mouth as quickly as possible, snorts.
After lunch, when they’re helping clean up the kitchen, Yuuri moves next to Victor, murmuring, “You don’t have to do that, you know.”
His friend cocks his head at him, furrowing his brow in confusion, “Do what?”
“Go all ‘look at me, I’m respectable’ on my parents,” Yuuri shrugs. “They don’t care, really. Phichit never goes pureblood mode on them. And, um,” he flushes, scratching the back of his neck, “They’re going to like you anyway, with all the stuff I’ve told them about you. I’m pretty sure my parents are convinced that you and Phichit save me from hordes of bullies every minute I’m in school.”
“I would,” Victor says immediately, as if on reflex, and then freezes, “I mean, we would.” He licks his lips, glancing downwards, “I didn’t mean to um, go ‘pureblood mode’, or whatever.”
“I’m used to it,” he smiles. He steps a little bit closer, mindful that no one hears them, just enough that their feet are almost touching in the narrow kitchen. It’s a little harder to breathe. “But you can be yourself with me, okay?”
Victor’s eyes flutter shut, before he whispers, quiet, “You’re an evil, evil guy, Yuuri Katsuki.”
…
Victor has to leave early (something about the amount of hours he has to sleep while on ‘Yakov’s training regime from hell’), but Yuri’s allowed to stay a little longer. Mari pats him for a while and challenges him to a selfie match of death (the theme is ‘who can balance more things on their nose while taking a selfie at the same time’, and it ends with them breaking five ceramic bowls and Yuri’s shoe on Mari’s face), and after a while both Yuri and Yuuri go upstairs, letting the adults watch a film. Something about a stone, a three-headed dog and a giant chess game. Honestly, Warners Bros are running out of ideas.
“Katsuki,” Yuri begins, flopping down on his bed and narrowing his eyes at him. “If you even think trying to make me play a board game, I’ll murder you.”
From where he’s kneeling down next to his bookshelf, Yuuri quickly lets go of the Monopoly box, “O-of course I wouldn’t do that, haha.”
Yuri huffs, stretching out on the bed like a cat and sighing, “I should have just gone home. You’re a mess, like always.”
“Well;” Yuuri swallows, moving to sit on his desk chair. “What do you want to do, then?”
“Sleep. Wake up and find out moderate maiming is legal and encouraged. Maybe eat pizza.”
“You just had like, three katsudon bowls!”
Yuuri hisses, “I don’t need you and your judging in my life.”
He holds his hands up, admitting defeat, “Okay, okay.” Yuuri giggles, “You’re cute when you’re excited about things, you know.”
The younger boy glares at him, showing his teeth, “I am not cute.”
“Oh yeah?” Yuuri teases, dragging his chair so it’s closer to the bed. “What about when you spent three hours telling me about the cat shelter that had opened up next to your house?”
Yuri’s ears go bright red, “I was not excited, you degenerate, I was merely moderately pleased that the human race has finally accepted cats as superior beings and are providing for their needs cost-free.”
“Or when you made me rewatch Otabek Altin’s catching the snitch ten times in the match against Portugal? With added commentary? And flaschards?”
The Slytherin throws a pillow at him, “It was twenty centimeters away, Katsuki. Learn to appreciate gods on Earth.”
Yuuri just laughs.
…
Hey Victor,
Thanks so much for sending me a book like you mentioned when you came over last week. I just thought that the book we talked about was one on magical creatures (remember? I mentioned I was struggling with the utter hell that is learning that so many stuff I thought didn’t exist is actually real?) and not your copy of Bridget Jones’s Diary.
Still loved it, though.
Yuuri
…
YUURI
OH MY GOD I’M SORRY
IT’S MY SUMMER READ OKAY THE MUGGLE STUDIES TEACHER MADE US READ ONE OF THESE LITTLE SHITS IT’S NOT LIKE I WAS READING IT BECAUSE I LIKED IT OR ANYTHING OKAY
SENDING YOU THE RIGHT BOOK WITH THIS LETTER
FML
VICTOR
…
“Hey,” Luke’s voice so close to him makes him look up, startled. The older skater is standing next to him, smiling cheerfully. He adjusts his beanie before patting him on the shoulder, “So, you’re leaving, are you, big boy?”
Yuuri flushes, not meeting his eyes. It’s his last figure skating lesson before he goes to Hogwarts for the school year, and he won’t be coming back until the summer. “Yeah, boarding school.”
“Ah, boarding school,” Luke muses. He bites his lower lip, glancing around them for a few seconds. He seems nervous. “Um, before you left, I wanted to ask you something.”
Yuuri nods, itching to get on the ice and start practicing, “Sure.”
Luke blurts out, “I was kind of hoping I could get your sister’s number.”
Yuuri freezes.
Oh.
Oh.
So that’s why he was so friendly, he realizes, with an almost disturbing calmness. Luke’s waiting for an answer, cheeks red, scratching the back of his neck. He looks just as embarrassed as Yuuri feels by this conversation, although for very different reasons. Luke probably didn’t even guess that Yuuri sorta has a crush on him. He swallows, “You like my sister?”
“...yeah,” Luke mumbles, staring at his feet. “I know it’s super weird, to go around asking her little brother, but I didn’t realize you wouldn’t be coming anymore, and I hadn’t gotten up the courage to ask her, so I was just hoping - I’m sorry, this is terrible.”
Despite himself, Yuuri lets out a short giggle, “Yeah, a little.” He takes a deep breath, ignoring the slight pang in his chest. “But I’ll give you her number anyway.”
Luke beams at him, throwing an arm around his shoulders and rubbing their cheeks together in excitement, “That’s my boy!”
It still makes Yuuri feel slightly lightheaded, having him so close, touching. And yet, there’s many things Yuuri can deal with, but crushing on a guy who would like to date his sister is not one of them. He’s ordering Phichit to unfollow him on all social media and erasing him from his memory.
“Yep,” he mutters. “That’s me.”
He reconsiders. Phichit would probably get angry on Yuuri’s behalf, even if it was more of a hero-worship crush than anything else, and make a big deal out of it. He’ll tell Victor, instead, he decides. Just omit the part where he’s a skater and everything will be fine.
…
“Mom,” Victor says, in a very quiet, very controlled voice. She looks up from the book she’s reading, blinking. Her son is holding a letter, one of those that come with puppies stickers on the front and Yuuri Katsuki’s signature on the bottom. “Have you ever wanted to murder someone?”
fin
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