#Logan defence right here I will not be changing my mind

[terrymelody]

Listening to Josh Groban singing you raise me up and had a gut wrenching Thought

Just imagine for the briefest of moments. This mf singing this to his mother

Like SIR!!!! MY HEART!!!

Especially when you remember that Sparrow passed away before fable 3. You know for a fact that Logan was a little mommas boy and probably misses his mother more than anything

[shadowphoenixrider]

Mistakes Made

(Shadow discovers something new about Gambit, and gets a little more than she bargained for! Or 'the fic that came about because I wanted to write Gambit poledancing, then it got a bit serious'. Enjoy!)

So I might have made a mistake.

It started off well enough - I'd finished my Danger Room training with Jean, practicing self-defence and tapping into my powers during a combat situation, and I was heading down to the showers to freshen up. The gym's on the way there, with its door left open as usual, and I glanced in there in pure curiosity, not really thinking.

And promptly saw a lot more of Gambit than I'd ever expected.

Clad only in a pair of tight black shorts, the Cajun mutant was gracefully entwined upside down around a metal pole several feet off the ground, eyes closed as he arched his back, only his hands and right leg keeping him in place. His muscles flexed under his pale skin with the effort, yet his face was a picture of serenity, almost as if he was meditating.

Slowly, with the elegance of a ballet dancer, Gambit brought his other leg up to loop around the pole, twisting his body with it so now his stomach faced the pole. Switching his hold, he stretched out his right leg, pushing up with his right arm to lean back, grasping his foot to form an oval.

I just stared, and had the rest of my brain been working at the time, I would have thanked every deity I knew that he had the place to himself. Logan would have certainly told me to pick my tongue (and jaw) off the floor by now.

Yet at that moment, I couldn't give a fuck. It wasn't a secret that Gambit was a handsome man: long, messy hair he kept tied back, bewitching black and red eyes, a jawline that could probably cut glass, and a tall, lean, yet well muscled body with an ass I swore blind that his leg armour deliberately accentuated. It was both a blessing and a curse that he wore that trenchcoat. I'd tried not to let my thoughts run away with me, either from our first meeting, or as the weeks ticked by.

But it's very hard to do so when he seems so confident, so comfortable in his own skin, a magnetism I couldn't fully resist. That and he didn't seem to mind me looking, or hadn't noticed (whilst I tried to be discrete, I found the latter hard to believe).

Discretion was completely out the window here - I was full on gawping. Watching his muscles move and ripple as he changed positions again, marvelling at the sheer strength he had to remain so still, legs raised high in the air and arms taking more than a little of his weight. I'd watched Gambit during Danger Room simulations, and had definitely been mesmerised by how athletic he was, barely staying still for more than a few moments without flipping, sliding, or using his staff to vault great distances - almost dancing in the thick of the action to a tempo only combat could set.

This, though? It was something else, almost intimate. I was getting front-row seats to the body under all that armour, the same one that moved like the embodiment of the kinetic energy that I'd felt thrumming through him. Where once I'd been witnessing his agility, now I witnessed his strength.

And I was definitely starting to have less that pure thoughts about the deep iliac grooves that dove under his shorts, the cords of powerful muscles that I saw tighten and flex in his thick thighs, and the little sigh of effort as he rolled himself upright.

Twining his leg with the casual ease of a snake coiling around a branch, Gambit lay back once more, one hand gripping the pole below him, his spare arm and leg stretched out into an elegant line. He held this position for several long seconds, when his eyelids fluttered open.

A heartbeat. Then he turned his head towards me.

Whatever spell I'd been under shattered in that moment, and I bolted, my face burning so hot I swore even my ears probably turned red. Of all the times to be caught, that was probably the worst, and I hoped and prayed that the Cajun either didn't see me, or would shrug it off...

---

"The autoclave will have finished by now." Beast said, as I shrugged on the white lab coat. "I'll go fetch the pipette tips if you continue setting up here."

"Sure." I nodded, setting up our equipment with rote, practiced ease, ticking off each stage on the checklist. Titrating samples was boring, mundane labwork, but it was necessary, especially without the automation I was used to in my hospital job. It hadn't technically been long, yet it already felt like another lifetime ago.

I was setting out the test tubes and flasks when I glimpsed movement at the doorway out of the corner of my eye. Movement attached to a pair of red eyes, and a wicked grin. Oh hells.

"Ah, dere you are!" Gambit said, strolling casually in. "Gambit was wonderin' where ya got to."

The Cajun might definitely be less scantily clad than before, but his crop-top and low rise jeans really didn't leave much to the imagination, especially when my eyes were drawn to those exposed abdominals and- I tore my gaze away again, blushing up a storm.

"Y-yeah, unfortunately titrations wait for no-one." I said, hoping in vain if I tried to return to my work and ignore the tall, handsome mutant at my side, my blush would go away.

"Mmm." Gambit hummed, and I felt his eyes rove over me - a feeling that made my lower back shiver, though not unpleasantly. He moved closer, lowering his head so I felt his breath wisp by my ear. "Enjoyed de show earlier?"

Heat flared brightly into my face, an uncomfortable stuttering sensation pulsing through me as my heart missed a beat.

"Y-You saw me?" I squeaked. Gambit chuckled throatily, a tremor thrumming down my spine at the sound so close.

"You think Gambit not keepin' an eye on his surroundings when he's busy?" He grinned. "Especially when dey be as pretty as you..."

I swallowed hard, my thoughts scattering like a flock of birds and my heart starting a fast beat under my chest.

"I-I, well, I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Oh, you can stare at Gambit any time, petite," he said smoothly, his grin becoming a more gentle smile. "He don't mind at all."

This blush was never going to go away at this rate. I managed a wobbly, shy smile up at him.

"I, I'm glad, because, well." I ducked my head, cursing that my words were sticking to my tongue. "I...I could have watched you for hours."

His eyebrow lifted slightly.

"Hours? Liked what ya saw, den?" He purred, sending a flash of heat into my chest and much lower regions of my body.

"Y, Yeah." I nodded. "Definitely." I plucked up my courage and straightened my back, forcing myself to look up into his eyes; time to regain the initiative. "Gotta say, very interesting to find out that pole-dancing is a part of your repertoire, Cajun."

Gambit's eyes flashed with glee, and his playful grin returned.

"Like de cards, Gambit be full of surprises," he said. "Got taught by an old friend back 'fore I came here." His eyes narrowed slightly. "Don't be gettin' any ideas, it weren't for de reasons ya think."

"I wasn't going to presume." I said, holding up my hands. "Not that it's my business to anyway. All I know is it's a beautiful physical art that like ballet takes a shocking amount of strength, that can sometimes be sexy. Although in your case, I suppose you just use it to strength train?"

He nodded.

"Rightly so, petite." He grinned. "An' Gambit sure you agree dat it beats the normal way of trainin', non?"

I giggled.

"It's certainly more interesting to look at than just lifting weights." I replied, folding my arms. "Although I'd definitely find it distracting if I was trying to train alongside you."

"Den Gambit just gonna have to give ya a private showin'." That wicked, mischievous grin was back just when I thought my blush was dying out.

"Thought I already got that earlier." I challenged, raising my chin. "Sure, by accident, but close enough, right?"

"Maybe, but you ain't seen everythin' that Gambit can do..."

He stepped away, looking up at the monkey bars that crisscrossed the ceiling above us. Gambit bounced on his feet a couple of times, before he sprang up to grasp the bar nearly above my head, swinging up to hook his legs onto another. Bracing his legs, Gambit released his hands, letting himself dangle freely in front of me, grinning widely. I tried to ignore the fact his crop-top was riding up his torso, revealing more of that gorgeous chest to me.

"Pretty good, non?" He asked, gesturing widely.

"Yeah alright, show-off." I giggled, stepping up to him. "But this is pretty basic considering what I saw you doing earlier."

"Ah, you wound me, mon amie!" Gambit said, pressing a hand to his chest. "But jus' 'cos it not be as interestin' as what Gambit can do on de pole, don't mean it don't have its uses..."

He leaned his body slightly closer, his obsidian and crimson eyes for once at the same height as mine, breath stirring the top of my hair. He smelt masculine, a sweet, tangy scent I could never truly place but I always found enticing, along with a faint hint of soap.

"Still not really seeing the use, Cajun..." I murmured, unable to stop myself from touching the mass of red-brunette hair hanging from his head like thick curtains, letting it trail over my fingers. Gambit reached up himself, brushing some curls back away from my face, his fingertips ghosting across my cheek.

"If ya come a little closer, Gambit happy to show you." His voice sunk into a deep, sensual rumble that thrilled me, tilting his head back with hooded eyes. Sudden realization dawned, and my heart quickened - all I had to do was lift my chin, and we'd barely be a breath apart. Then I'd only need to raise onto my tiptoes to close the gap.

Time seemed to slow to a crawl even as my heart pounded in my ears. I tilted my head back. Gambit's fingers curled lightly yet tenderly around the back of my head, as if guiding me, thumb brushing the underside of my chin. His lips parted, the scent of spice on his breath.

"Gambit..."

"Shadow..." Came his equally soft answer, both of us utterly entranced. The outside world faded away so it was just him and I. I reached up towards his cheek, my heels beginning to leave the floor-

Someone loudly cleared their throat.

I sprang back as if burned, my face scorched with heat as I realized Beast was standing in the doorway, pipette tips in his massive hands...and looking extremely unamused.

Annoyance flashed across Gambit's face before he turned a charming smile on for the other mutant.

"Salut, Beast!" He said cheerily.

"Whilst your presence is appreciated Gambit, I would like to request that you wear appropriate laboratory safety equipment whilst you are here." Beast replied dryly.

"He's kinda right." I said, smiling weakly. "Your hair's kinda...all over the place." Gambit flashed me a look - 'whose side are you on?'

"Furthermore," Beast continued, hopping up onto the bars himself, "athletic pursuits that are not part of the experimental process are better sought in the gymnasium. And," he gave Gambit a particularly stern look, "I would kindly ask you to refrain from seducing my assistant when she has other matters to attend to."

I glanced away as a renewed wave of embarrassment washed over my face. If Gambit harboured any regret or shame, he certainly didn't show it.

"Didn't realize I was disturbin' anythin' important." The Cajun lied. "Gambit'll get out from under ya feet."

He slithered down onto his hands, carefully lowering his legs so he didn't kick us in the face. He flashed us a smile as he climbed to his feet.

"See ya around, mes amis!" He spoke, winking at me before striding out. I watched him go, sad to see him leaving, yet glad to observe how the denim of his jeans shaped itself tightly around his ass.

The thud of Beast landing next to me reminded me that I was supposed to be doing something, and fresh embarrassment flared inside me as I tried to grasp the threads of memory.

"S-Sorry, Doctor." I stuttered, running through the checklist again. "I-I didn't mean to get distracted."

"That's quite alright, Shadow," he said kindly, smiling. "Gambit can be quite the distraction when he wants to be. Especially when there's something he wants."

I swallowed hard, my mind flashing back to the almost-kiss barely a minute before. It had felt like an hour ago.

"Yeah, it's a wonder anyone gets anything done with him wandering around." The words were out of my mouth before my brain caught up, and I winced. "Wait, no-"

The doctor chuckled, patting my shoulder.

"We've just gotten used to him, Shadow. As will you, in time." He set the box of tips down, effortlessly breaking the striped autoclave seal with one swipe of his clawed finger. I picked up the pipette, the instrument settling perfectly inside my hand. Suddenly, my brain finally caught up with the conversation.

"Hold on, 'something he wants'?" I frowned, looking over to Beast as he typed on the computer next to me. He paused, looking thoughtful for a long moment.

"Shadow, I hope it has not escaped your notice that Gambit is interested in you." He looked sideways at me. "Indeed, the scene I witnessed between the two of you should be evidence enough that he has formed a particular attachment to you."

I blushed - any more of this and it was going to get stuck there.

"Y-yeah. He does seem to like me quite a bit."

Beast turned to face me properly, his brows furrowed.

"Shadow, I would advise caution when dealing with our Cajun friend. Be careful you don't read too deeply into his intentions with you."

"What do you mean by that?" I asked, frowning.

Beast sighed.

"Whilst Gambit is not a man who will lead you on, it is more than likely he is not interested in relationship beyond the carnal nature," he said. "You must set your expectations accordingly."

I felt a sharp, searing sensation in my chest, and tried to ignore it.

"That...That's fine." I nodded, swallowing hard. "I'm ok with that. I, I don't want to make things complicated anyway, especially with what happened with my ex." I smiled weakly, turning the pipette around in my hand. "I always promised him that we would stay friends if we ever broke up...only to find out I had to wipe him completely from my life in order to get over him. I'd hate to have to do it to someone I've become good friends with, and all the shit that would entail."

"Indeed." Beast settled his great hand across my back. "I'm sorry your long relationship with your ex-partner ended in such a way. Perhaps you can find someone who will make you as happy as he did in the future."

"Maybe." I shrugged. "But I'm not really looking for that right now. I just, want to live my own life for a bit now, you know?"

"Completely understandable." Beast nodded. "Although, I must add - even if Gambit is just seeking a casual relationship with you, do not be foolish enough to think that grants you carte blanche to toy with his emotions." For a moment, an anger entered the doctor's eyes, an insight to why his mutant name was so. "Gambit does not open up very often to people, and you have earned far more of his trust than most. Do not abuse it."

"No, of course not." I shook my head. "He seems a really nice man, I wouldn't dream of doing that to him, or anyone." I sighed softly. "If we never become anything more than friends with benefits, that's fine with me."

For some reason though...I didn't exactly feel convinced.

---

Outside the lab, just out of sight, Gambit's face fall.

Yet he wasn't sure why.

[iamapoopmuffin]

What are you working on now? Or at least rotating around in your head now? (Because that counts as writing! 😂)

Ooh okay, I have a bad habit of flitting between projects when I get my inspiration, but I'm working on a few things right now (one of which I think I've been working on all year but in my defence it is intended to be a very long piece-)

Who Wants To Be A Best Man? (Ducktales) - That thing I posted a preview of where Dewey, Della and Webby are putting Donald's potential best men for his wedding through trials and Storkules crashes the trials determined to be the best of the best men for his bestest friend ever, Donald. I've written everything up to the first trial but by thunder I still can't come up with a trial lol.

The Sharkbomb AU (Ducktales) - As it says on the tin. I'm bringing the Sharkbomb AU to life by stealing a life giving McGuffin from Legend of the Three Caballeros and putting it in the puppet and writing the chaotic adventures of Flinty and Son as they adapt to this new part of their lives and then Sharkbomb finds out he was a ventriloquist puppet and has an existential crisis.

Bring Your Daughters To Work Day (Ducktales) - So, precursor, I love that Donald is the 'More kids to adopt don't mind if I do' dad, and I love that he did not hesitate to take May and June, but also half of me also wants Scrooge to raise all his daughters once someone actually tells him they're biologically his daughters and also for Webby to have the sisters she's wanted since Season 1. This led to me writing a thing that's Scrooge realising these are his kids and then the four of them going alone on a father/daughter bonding adventure. I also want to write a bonding piece for Webby and Mrs Beakley.

The Final Solution (Original) - Point note, all superhero stories are posted on a separate blog focusing on the superhero series (it is not updated often as all the co-creators, me included, are usually very busy with other life stuff). Anyway, this is the final part in a whole overarching arc, essentially the end of the main Censor and Ballad arc, which summed up is 'Ballad is a disgraced former hero trying to step back into the limelight but committing criminal acts to do so and is determined to use his biological son's powers to enact the ultimate staged disaster for him to fix as a mighty hero'. This staging involves killing off other heroes so that A, people think there's a serial killer, and B, he's the only hero who can stop the crazed killer known only as The Censor. This is the long long one. It has fights, murder, sexism and transphobia.

The Fear (Original) - Another superhero story, this one focuses on students at Janusz' school for super humans, specifically Ajax. I'll probably make this a little series that introduces every student, giving a little background and leading to them joining the student population. In Ajax's case, he's being hunted by both a cult he stole an eldritch horror from and the government that knows he has fear and insanity inducement powers and is linked to said cult-

Mirror Mirror On The Wall (One Piece) - The Straw Hats arrive on a strange island that traps them with mirror versions of themselves. Mirror Chopper steals organs and Mirror Brook hunts whales. There's a whole host of evil Straw Hats stuff I've discussed with @rosetheshapeshifter to build up on but I can't say too much about specifics here without either spoiling things or making this answer way too long

Alcohol And Idiots Do Not Mix (Kuroko's Basketball) - I'm finishing the second and third chapters of this old shit if it kills me.

Away In A Manger (Teen Titans) - Oh dear god, this. So, fun fact, I discovered while reading comics that Beast Boy can willingly change gender when changing animal which, alongside my at the time interest in Norse mythology and specifically the origins of Sleipnir, led to me joking with some friends and the wife about a cursed M-preg idea, which in turn led to the creation of fankid Fifi Logan, which in turn led to me actually writing this. It all comes down to me dicking about with cursed cursed ideas. And nothing will ever stop me.

Assorted other small side original series stories. Most of them gay.

[sometimes-love-is-enough]

re: your last ask about the time travel shenanigans—holy fuck yes please more of this. like, not only is it funny as hell, which i appreciate, but it's also a. more c!thomas and b. points to just how interestingly both the plot and characters of this series have grown over the years and i am ALL for it

"Janus!" is the first thing Thomas exclaims when he sees the Side Formerly Known Exclusively As Deceit rise up where Logan would usually stand. Which just might be a mistake, if Janus’s expression is anything to go by.

Okay, in Thomas's defence -

This is a really, really weird day, even by his standards. Because, like, Logan's currently standing in front of the stairs, and that's not where Logan's supposed to be, and his shirt and tie are all wrong. And had had been grinning. Openly. He had been openly grinning when Thomas had first woken up and looked in his wardrobe and realized that his favorite t-shirt apparently doesn't exist anymore and all his clothes are a half-size smaller than he's used to but also they still fit and - okay, no, back to Logan. He'd gone downstairs and tripped over a chair that wasn't supposed to be there and called out Logic. And he'd been about to ask him what's going on and why everything feels so off and also why Logan's standing in Virgil's usual spot instead of over to the right of the stairs. But then he'd noticed all the aforementioned Very Weird Clothing Things. And he'd stopped and said, "Uh, Logan?" and Logan's grin had dropped and he'd stared at Thomas for a full ten seconds then whispered, "what the fuck," with great emotion.

And then Patton had shown up with a ridiculous amount of pun-riddled cheerfulness that Thomas had been able to clock as sixty-percent fake within about half a second. And his clothes had been all wrong, too, and after a lot of confused, borderline-incomprehensible yelling at each other, Roman had showed up and added to the chaos.

"I am scared and confused and on the verge of completely losing it!" Thomas had declared at some point, which had been the cue for an ominous music sting somewhere to Thomas's right that made everybody jolt in terrified unison.

"Did somebody say scared and confused and on the verge of completely losing it?"

"Virgil, thank god!" Thomas had practically yelled, and just about thrown himself across the room to get to him - before pausing midway and allowing his brain to process... wrong hoodie. Wrong amount of eyeshadow. "Wait. No, hang on, is this - "

"FUCKING WHO," Virgil shrieked, leaping backwards half a flight of stairs, which had led to another round of confused yelling, with Thomas trying to assure them all that he's fine he hasn't had some sort of strange head injury or whatever, he's just really happy to see Virgil and no of course that's not weird, what do you mean who's Virgil, that's Virgil right over there, Roman please put down that sword things are already out of hand -

And at some point Thomas had got it into his head that the most reasonable course of events was to summon the one person who always seems to know everything that everybody else doesn't, which brings everything up to speed, more or less. Roman had gone, "Thomas, what are you doing," and Thomas, feeling slightly manic at this point, had said, "I'm trying to summon a demon, obviously," because the best way to get hold of a certain someone probably is blatant lying, and boom, instant Janus.

"Jeee-sus Christ on a cookie-shaped canoe, what is he doing here?!"

"Janus!"

So, Janus pops up, he looks literally the same as he always has (except maybe with shorter hair? Wait, they all have shorter hair, including Thomas, wait a second -) with his half-snake-face and his hat and gloves that cosy-looking capelet of his. And although his expression reflects faint bewilderment and that very particular 'wait, what' emotion that results in being pulled abruptly away from something you were busy with, he looks so normal that Thomas thinks for a moment he might be the only sane person left.

But then Janus makes a series of start-and-stop noises of incomprehension, and gestures wildly towards Virgil, who's crouched midway up on the stairs behind Logan, looking like a cornered wild animal, and snaps, "Why for the love of everything that's holy would you tell him my name?"

"You think this is me?" Virgil retorts, hands going up to grab desperately at the bars lining the side of the staircase. "I don't understand anything that's going on! He somehow knows my name! He's - he's being nice to me!"

It suddenly occurs to Thomas that this might just possibly be a time travel sort of thing. It would explain the clothes shift. And the altered layout of his house. And the fact that when he'd checked his phone this morning it had told him it was 2016, and also it hadn't been his phone, it had been the one he'd broken a few years ago in a tragic piano-moving-related accident.

...Okay, yeah, this is absolutely a time travel thing.

"Is somebody going to explain why Thomas ruined all of our heartfelt name reveal moments in one fell swoop?" Roman demands. "I thought we agreed we were going to do them gradually and draw them out as long as possible for dramatic effect!"

"I agreed to none of that," Virgil snaps from his position halfway up the stairs.

"Yes," says Logan, "yes, I think we all would like to know what's going on. Thomas? What's going on?"

"Uh - " Thomas, who has just come to a rather startling realization about time travel and also about how shitty his Sides' taste in costumes were pre-wardrobe change, doesn't really have a prepared answer for this. "I have... I am - I just - "

Thomas struggles for words. Really struggles. And everyone's just standing there, watching him with expressions that range from terror to confusion to suspicion, and they all look so weirdly young in a way that's hard to pin down. It's the clothes. It's probably the clothes, or maybe it's the way they hold themselves. Roman, carelessly confident, without a doubt in the world. Patton, still wearing a fixed dad-grin, politely baffled and looking back and forth. Logan, who hasn't been systematically beaten down and pushed back over the course of many, many years. Virgil, who's basically just a ball of grey-and-black anger and acerbic anger at this point. Janus, who's... Janus. Who's looking at him in a way that Janus has never looked at him before.

And Remus is probably lurking somewhere in the back of his mind, too, doing whatever Remus does, and - would Remus be any different now, four years prior? Thomas hadn't had any significant problems with intrusive thoughts, not back then... or, well, back now. Maybe he's calmer, maybe Thomas could actually talk with him. Try to work something out, try to understand.

But wait, he's still got to give the Sides right here and right now an answer.

Hm.

...Thomas has been through a lot in the past four years. Not, like, fantasy protagonist a lot, but more like a extended psychological journey of self-discovery and mental health crises. Now, he wouldn't trade any of this for the world, because he's learned a hell of a lot about himself in the process - but also? The Sides have put him through a lot of horrifying realization-type things.

Which is why he absolutely one hundred percent deserves to do what he's about to do next.

"I," says Thomas, with an extraordinary amount of confidence and self-assuredness, "am psychic."

And the dead silence holds. Now even Patton is staring at him in disbelief. Janus has graduated into outright horror, his face twisted up into a oh god no I am somehow responsible for letting him delude himself this far expression.

"Thomas!" Roman gasps, almost instantly lighting up with genuine enthusiasm. "Oh, Thomas, I'm so proud, we've been working on this for years. Tell me, does this extend to telekinesis, or just somehow knowing all our names and nothing else?"

"What?" Janus says. "What - no. No, you can't seriously be going along with this - what? That... what? That doesn't even make any sense?" He turns wildly from left to right, and - okay, it's very enjoyable to see him out of his depth, to be perfectly honest. Thomas likes Janus a lot, knows he has his best interests at heart, but the whole courtroom thing had been a major dick move. This is satisfying. "Are any of you getting this? Does anyone here understand what's going on?"

"I'm psychic," Thomas repeats doggedly. "I acquired magical psychic powers and now I know all of your names and tragic backstories. Surprise! I unlocked my full potential and the ninety-percent of my brain power that I wasn't using."

"That's - that's a widely-perpetuated and wildly incorrect myth," Logan says weakly.

"Nope. Turns out it's true, and I was only using ten percent of it, and now that I've gone full big-brain, I know that Patton's repressing all his bad feelings because he doesn't want to bother anyone with them, Virgil acts all scary and menacing because he thinks it's the only way that I'll ever listen to him, and Janus is secretly a huge dork with a heart of gold - uh, yellow, I guess."

"How dare you," Janus breathes, looking horrified.

"Wha - " Patton suddenly looks very pale indeed.

"Also, Roman, you're my hero; Logan, please never stop smiling like that ever again, it's literally my favorite thing in the world and if you ever stop being enthusiastic about teaching me things I will cry - and Virgil, I love you."

Virgil lets out a choked little noise like he's just been punched directly in the stomach.

"I love all of you," Thomas adds, an afterthought. "I never say that enough. Janus, that goes for you as well. You're right, I need to take care of myself more."

"I'm - " Janus is still looking around at everyone in complete disbelief, but now his gaze fixes onto Thomas, his eyes wide. "I'm what?"

Thomas is now on a roll. An extremely cathartic sort of roll. "And Remus -"

Everybody immediately panics. Virgil and Logan's hands both immediately leap up to clasp over their mouths, which seems to be a reflexive reaction on Janus's behalf. Patton lets out a deranged-sounding high pitched giggle that edges into genuine hysteria.

"Brother? What brother? I don't know what a brother is!" Roman says loudly. "I've never had a brother in my life! Thomas, your glorious psychic powers are malfunctioning. Have you tried turning them off and turning them on again?"

" - I'm not going to lie and say I love him, but -" Thomas stops abruptly, and staggers  backwards to catch himself on the couch as a thought strikes him out of literally nowhere. "Son of a bitch -"

"Does being psychic make you swear a lot?" Patton asks weakly. "Because, uh. Not sure I like this side of you, kiddo - "

"Logan," says Thomas. "Logan, what's the date today? This is so, so important, what's the date."

"It's... October," Logan says, very slowly. "October twentieth. 2016?"

"Holy shit," Thomas whispers, and then says it louder, "holy shit. Okay, listen. I was going to sort out all of our collective psychological issues in one impressive emotional speedrun, but I've realized we have something much more important to do." He pauses, and takes in a very deep, shuddering breath. "Guys. We can save Vine. Excuse me. I've just realized I’ve got to make a lot of calls."

[a-vintage-snake]

Don’t Make Me Be The Bad Guy

Pairing(s): Pre-romantic Moceit

Warnings: Dystopian future, implied torture

Characters: Janus Sanders, Patton Sanders, Roman Sanders, Logan Sanders, Remus Sanders, Virgil Sanders

Summary: After seven years of fighting, Patton and his superhero team finally capture the super villain known as Deceit. But when Patton discovers evidence that sheds a new light on their nemesis he starts to wonder... Did he do the right thing?

Word Count: 9411

Author’s Note: For @dramaticsnakes, who’s a wonderful reader and writer. And special thanks to @rainbowbutterfrosting who helped me finish this when I almost wanted to give up. (Also, as always I upload and edit the mistakes out after, so bear with me)

Read on AO3

In the end, it had been Patton who had struck the final blow.

It had been mostly a matter of luck, really. One moment where Patton managed to break through the henchmen’s defences. One moment where he saw that their nemesis’ back was turned to him. One moment where he made a split decision.

One moment. And that moment had made all the difference.

He didn’t quite realize he had thrown one of his famous lightning bolts until it hit square between his enemy’s shoulder blades. He stood there, paralyzed, as Janus Lyre (alias Doctor Deceit) crumbled to the floor. The battle around them grounded to a halt as well, as the henchmen saw their leader unconscious at the feet of their enemies. His teammates froze as well, looking up at Patton in gaping disbelief.

When time finally seemed to start again, everything went by in a blur. The henchmen managed to escape, unfortunately with the super weapon Patton and his team had come to destroy. But it didn’t even seem to matter.

“By Odin’s beard, Padre!” Roman lifts him up in a hug. “You did it!!”

“I… I did?” Patton confusedly asks, still feeling a little dizzy.

“You got him! You actually got him!” Roman puts him back on his feet with a giant grin on his face. “We can finally put him away!” “But the weapon-!”

“Forget the weapon! We’ve got the bastard, Heart!” Virgil grins. “After seven years we finally got him! It’s over!”

“Well, not exactly,” Logan pipes in, although he can’t seem to stop grinning too. “There’s still the matter of rounding up the rest of his organization-”

“Technical details, my friend!” Roman dramatically waves Logan’s objections away. “We got their leader! Not a henchman, not some lackey, their actual leader! How long do you think until their little League of Losers falls apart?”

“Even so,” Logan says. “Better not celebrate until Doctor Deceit is safely behind bars. You three search the building. Who knows, maybe some of his henchmen are still hiding somewhere,” Logan throws a scornful look down at the unconscious Janus at their feet. “I will stay here and stand guard.”

“Ah yes, I was just about to suggest that!” Roman says as he flips his hair proudly. “Great intuition, Nerdy and the Brain!”

“Yes, sounds like a good plan!” Patton quickly squeaks as Logan gains a look that says he’s about a minute away from using his telekinesis to throw Roman across the room. “How about you call in our superiors, Logan? We need to put this villain behind bars!”

“Excellent idea, Heart Shock.” Logan says gratefully, while ignoring Roman’s protesting noises. Roman loved making the calls on jobs well done (which to be fair hadn’t occurred often lately).

“Great!” Patton grabs the hand of the still protesting Roman and pulls him along. “Come on Prince!”

Roman pouts and grumbles, but allows Patton to pull him further into the dark lair. He catches a glimpse of Virgil’s grin before he turns a corner.

“Bet you I can find something cool before you do!” Patton smiles up at Roman. His teammate’s grumpy face instantly brightens.

“Oh, you’re on Padre!”  

Dissolving into giggles Patton and Roman run down the halls. Roman could easily outfly him, yet he chooses to run alongside Patton for now. Giddily Patton runs towards a promising looking door at the end of the hallway.

Throwing it open he however sags in disappointment as the room they found only holds a couple cardboard boxes.

“Bah, nothing of importance,” Roman says as he kicks over the boxes and nothing but rusty spare mechanical parts fall out. “I suppose even villains need a trash cupboard. Come Heart!” Roman levitates from the ground. “Let us find something more dastardly!”

Before Patton can say anything Roman flies out of the room. Judging from the clanging sounds he’s already searching in a room further ahead. Patton casts one last glance around the room before he shrugs and turns to follow.

He pauses.

Uncertainly he turns around again. Something about the room doesn’t feel… Right. He knows it, yet he can’t put his finger on it why exactly. His powers crackle in his veins, sensing the off-ness in the air.

Cautiously Patton walks around the room, circling the walls slowly with one hand trailing amongst the bricks. The sense of wrongness only increases until…

In front of a seemingly bare wall he stops. There it is. He feels an unusual amount of electricity clustering behind the stone, yet the wall shows no outer signs of being anything else than… Well, a wall. Curiously Patton puts both his hands on the bricks and closes his eyes.

The world behind his eyelids lights up in bursts of electricity. His power hums in tune with the wires inside the walls, stringing all over the building and mapping out the lair in his mind’s eye in perfect detail. Patton only takes short notice of it before he calls his powers back and focuses it all on the wall before him. Yes, there it was. His powers outline a door in the wall, carefully hidden behind a buzzing security system.

Well, no match for him! Patton only needs to concentrate for a few seconds to have the electricity revert and change directions. Flexing his fingers and furrowing his brow he wills the electricity to move into the opposite direction, to change their route, until finally he hears a click. Patton opens his eyes. He pulls his hands back as the wall shifts and a door opens, so seamlessly hidden in the brick it was invisible to the bare eye. Patton allows himself a proud grin. Oh, he was on a roll today! Patton steps into the room, his footsteps echoing in the darkness. He searches for a light switch, but he can’t find one nearby. No matter! With a soft snap small lightning bolts dance on his fingers, revealing rich red walls which somehow complimented the flickering lightning in his hands.

The room is mostly bare, apart from a table in the centre of the room. It’s covered with various maps, some showing population size while others showing outlines of cities, roads and shops. There were some pencils and pens in the middle of the table, most sharp and pointed while a few were so dull that they couldn't be used anymore.

Patton noticed only one chair at the table. He only looked at it, remembering the times were Logan lectured him about not touching the crime scene unless absolutely necessary. Still, the chair seemed comfortable, the black leather clearly in great condition.

His eyes drift slightly downwards towards the cabinets under the table. They all looked the same to him, a spruce colour with a silver handle that could be pulled out. He crouches as he tries to pull open the drawer without ruining the possibility of getting fingerprints. What kind of horrors would he find in there? Knowing Janus it was probably something awful, like torture devices, or puppets of them with their eyes crossed out, or… Or…

Not able to take it any longer, Patton pulls open the drawer. He draws back, covering his face with his arms and waiting for poisonous darts or something to strike out and hit him. After a few seconds of nothing happening, Patton carefully peeks over his arms.

Inside the drawer... is just files. No cyanide, no razor-sharp knives, just... files. Patton lowers his arms and opens the one next to it, with more haste than the last one, only to find more files. Huh… That’s… Not what he was expecting? He honestly didn't know what he expected to find. It's not like the files were bad to find, it just didn't give him the rush of putting in the last piece to a puzzle. Capturing Janus almost felt like that. He knew he should have been more proud of himself, but this wasn't even close to the end of it. There still were all of Janus' accomplices and the propaganda he spread throughout several cities to take care of after all. Maybe the files had the names of his accomplices in them?

Forgetting Logan’s warning about contaminating the crime scene Patton grabs one of the files from the drawer and absentmindedly flips it open.

A scream echoes across the halls. Patton jerks up, forgetting the papers in his hand as the sound of struggle trail toward him. He jumps up, stuffs the files in his jacket before he runs back to where they left their enemy tied up.

It appears that backup had arrived, and in that same time their enemy had woken up. Several soldiers struggle with restraining a livid Janus, who trashes in their grip as they try to drag him into an awaiting prison van. They had managed to gag him before he woke, a muzzle strapped to his face to protect the soldiers from the venom of both his words and his fangs. He fights wildly, but in the end he is still one man against too many. As they finally wrestle him to the ground to clap him in handcuffs, he and Patton make eye contact.

Despite that he just knocked the man unconscious, despite that Janus is currently lying on the ground restrained by ten men, Patton instinctively takes a step back from the pure fury in those mismatched eyes.

Janus looks at him like he singlehandedly doomed the world.

One soldier pushes a taser onto his neck. Janus’ eyes roll back in his head as he convulses on the ground, muffled cries coming from behind the muzzle. When the taser withdraws Janus slumps to the ground, unconscious once more. Finally the soldiers can drag him into the prison van.

“Haha, yes!!” Roman yells. “You shall taste justice now, villain!”

Roman laughs, but it is only when the doors of the van close and they drive off that Patton feels like he can breathe again.

--

The press conferences were always Patton’s least favourite part. To stand next to their CEO, listening to a briefing of yet another failed mission while the people in the crowd shook their head in disapproval had always been torture. The longer the years went on the worse the pressure to actually defeat their villain became. To come back to the cameras every time Janus escaped became worse and worse as the years went on. The disappointment of not only the AEP, but of the people… That alone felt worse than any punch he had ever gotten in battle.

Now however Patton felt like he could just burst from all the excitement. He could barely stand still enough for his stylists to brush his hair into a tamer shape. He peeked behind the curtains to the gilded ballroom beyond. The AEP had chosen this specific ballroom to announce the big news on purpose. Just two years ago Janus and his horrid crew had crashed a fundraiser being held here and had stolen all the people’s so graciously donated funds for a new hotel. They hadn’t been able to capture him. It had been an awful night!

To be here again was to show that villain they were not afraid. That they could claim back the spaces he so rudely invaded. Seeing all the people in their beautiful evening gowns and best jewellery now made Patton want to burst out from behind the curtain to yell at them that they were safe!! He wanted to shout it from the rooftops, wanted to yell at the entire world!

You are safe! We rescued you! I defeated the villain, I did, I did-!!

“Here are our heroes of the day!”

Distracted Patton looks back to see their CEO has come backstage. Bentley Ceund is a man in his late fifties, with a bleach blond hair dye job that does not quite hide away his grey roots, as always dressed in a stylishly expensive suit. He was the one who had founded the AEP, or An Endless Peace organization, all those years ago. Yet outside of press conferences they did not see him often. And even when they did, it were often meetings filled with harsh words and bitter disappointment.  

“Have I wasted all my money on THIS?!” Their CEO had bellowed at them the last time they had seen him, when Janus had destroyed several important construction sites. “On FAILURES who can’t even capture ONE MEASLY MAN?!” Angry spit had hit Patton in the face as he struggled to hold back tears when Bentley had moved in close and screamed in their faces. “You’re a fucking EMBARRESEMENT to ME and the company who RAISED YOU FROM BIRTH!! UNGRATEFUL, WORTHLESS WASTES OF TIME!!”

Their TV and leisure time privileges had been taken away from them for quite some time back then.

That screaming man from last time was a far cry from the smiling one that approaches them now however. No, he in fact gives the others a joyful hug and praise. Roman and Logan beam, and even Virgil smiles hesitantly. When he turns to him Patton nervously fidgets for a moment, but Bentley gives him the possibly the grandest smile out of all of them.

“Heart Shock!” Bentley laughs as he draws Patton into a hug. He never uses their real names, even though he knew them by those well before their superhero names. “Well done, my boy!”

“T-Thank you sir!” Patton says excitedly, almost melting into the hug despite the overwhelming smell of body spray. He can’t help it. It wasn’t often he was the one who got most of the praise. That was usually either Logan or Roman. “I couldn’t have done it without the others though-!”

“No need to be so modest,” Bentley draws back from the hug, put keeps his hands on Patton’s shoulder. “I’ve read the report. You are the one shot down that son of a bitch!

“Oh, well,” Patton flusters. “Anyone could have done it-!”

But in the end it was you.” Their CEO chuckles, almost fondly. “Be proud of yourself, son. Thanks to you…” Bentley pats him on the shoulder. “The company is safe again.” “And the innocent civilians, sir!” Patton helpfully says.

“Hmm? Oh yes, those too I suppose.”

Patton frowns lightly, but before he can say anything Bentley’s PA interrupts.

“Mister Ceund? The program is about to begin.”

“Ah, yes! It’s time boys!” Bentley grins towards his superheroes. “Let’s tell the world what we have achieved today!” He gives Patton a pat on his cheek before he turns and walks to the curtains, waiting for the moment to make his grand entrance. Patton frowns, but he doesn’t have the time to think for long. Their CEO walks onto the stage where thunderous applause greets him. Eventually Patton just shrugs and stands with his teammates, dismissing the uncomfortable thoughts.

As the applause slowly grows to a halt, Bentley takes centre stage. “Today is a momentous occasion,” He says into the microphone. “After seven years of making our streets unsafe, the villain known as Doctor Deceit has finally been put behind bars!”

The crowd erupts into applause, filling the gilded ballroom with cheers and cameras flashing. Beside him Virgil flinches from the sudden noise. Patton discretely slips his hand into Virgil’s and squeezes. Virgil gives a grateful squeeze back.

“Today, history has been made. Today this organization has finally achieved that which we have promised you, all those years ago…” Their CEO pauses for a second, before proudly continuing. “An Endless Peace.”

The crowd applauds again, laughing politely at the reference of the company name.

“But of course, we did not do it alone!”

Patton and the others took a deep breath. Right. Time for the show!

“Please welcome your heroes! Here is Prince Charming!”

On that cue Roman flies up from behind the curtains and the crowd erupts into cheers. Roman flies his usual round over the crowd, occasionally sharing a high-five with an audience member and flashing his fans a million-dollar smile. Several men and women giggle and blush behind their hands as he flips his hair and blows kisses to the crowd.

“Show-off…” Virgil silently scoffs beside him.

“Come now, Virge,” Patton whispers back. “You know Roman loves the cameras! Let him have his fun.”

Virgil rolls his eyes and shakes his head, but still a fond smile curls up his lips.

“Next, give it up for Brain Teaser!”

Logan purses his lips and sighs, but makes his entrance from behind the curtains anyway. Virgil and Patton exchange a knowing look. They’d listened to plenty of Logan’s rants about how ‘utterly illogical’ the serious man thought his superhero name was. Unfortunately the public was by now too familiar with the name to even suggest renaming him.

“Let me hear you for Stormcloud!”

Virgil supresses a shudder yet he still reluctantly dematerializes, only to rematerialize on stage in a cloud of shadows. While the crowd only grows in volume Patton winces in sympathy. The EAP knows how much Virgil can’t stand loud sounds, but for the audience he has to bear it with a smile. It was a weakness their enemies had exploited frequently. Janus would often blast high-pitched noises at such a volume Virgil would crumble where he stood, allowing him to escape over and over.  

Well, Patton thinks with a tinge of pride, he won’t harm his friends ever again now.

“And of course, last but certainly not least… The man of the hour! The hero who struck the deciding blow! Put your hands together for HEART SHOCK!”

The curtains are drawn and Patton is momentarily blinded from the hundreds of cameras flashing and deafened by the crowd cheering. Squinting Patton stands in the spotlight, dizzily smiling at the onslaught of praise that is directed his way. He walks forward- Although it feels like stumbling is a better word- to the front of the stage to where the CEO waits for him with a smile. Journalists crowd the stage as they shout questions.

“Heart Shock!! Heart Shock, over here-!”

“Heart Shock, how do you feel-?”

“What was going through your head?”

“How did you take the villain down? We want all the juicy details-!”

“Everyone, everyone! Please!” Bentley laughs. “One question at a time, please!”

Patton yelps as Bentley puts an arm around his shoulders and pulls him into a side hug like he’s a proud father. The cameras around them go nuts as their CEO smiles and poses with Patton.

“How are you feeling, Heart Shock?” One journalist manages to yell over the cacophony of questions.

“W-Well…” Patton stammers into the microphone. “I-I feel quite proud-!”

“A well deserved pride, my boy!” Bentley says jovially as he squeezes his shoulder.

“Yeah… I suppose it is-!” Patton smiles.

“Heart Shock! How do you think the villain will react to his status as prisoner?” One journalist yells, a question that is met with gaudy giggles.

“I guess…” Patton says with hesitant excitement. “He’ll find it…” He snaps his fingers, lightning dancing over his hands as he finger guns at the audience. “Quite shocking?”

To Patton’s bewildered delight the entire audience erupts into laughs. Even Bentley next to him laughs, while he had always disapprovingly glared before when Patton made a pun. Patton can’t stop the grin that spreads on his face even if he had wanted to.

The rest of the evening goes by in a haze. As the press conference part of the evening ends and the superheroes must mingle with the guests, the praise just keeps on coming. Patton gets patted on the back, hugged and complimented. The sheer amount of attention is dizzying. Patton can’t stop smiling throughout all of it. It might just be the best evening in his life.

It isn’t until he’s in bed, still glowing with pride and from all the praise, that Patton remembers the files in his jacket.

His superhero jacket lays thrown into a corner, cast aside earlier as he quickly got into a clean, more sleek version of his hero outfit for the press conference. Giving it a glance from where he sits on his bed he’s almost tempted to leave it until next morning. His handlers had actually given him hot chocolate and two cookies before bed! Two!! That was a treat he didn’t often get! He just wants to enjoy them in peace.

Still… Perhaps he could hand them over tomorrow, announcing all the wicked plans that are undoubtedly in the files that he had also stopped when he captured Janus. Grinning at that mental image Patton gets up from and retreats back into his comfy bed with the files, munching on a cookie as he lazily starts skimming through the papers.

An hour later his hot chocolate has long run cold and the second cookie lies forgotten on its tray. Patton sits straight up in his bed, the files open on his knees and his gaze firmly locked on the wall in front of him. His first cookie feels like lead in his stomach.

It couldn’t be the truth… It couldn’t be, it couldn’t be!!

Abruptly coming back into motion Patton stuffs the files under his mattress and turns off the light to sleep, determined not to even consider or think about what is in them anymore. Yet it takes him until the first rays of dawn to finally fall asleep, and even when he does sleep his dreams are filled with mismatched eyes that look at him with a gaze that burns, burns, burns…

During the days of the week that follows he’s fine. He can smile and take the praise that he’s still showered with daily, with the files only a distant memory.

During the nights, however… Patton can’t seem to shake the image of those eyes. Furious, loathing mismatched eyes, looking at him like he singlehandedly doomed the world. The files underneath his mattress seem to burn a hole in his soft bedding, demanding his attention.

It is only a week later when he awakens from yet another nightmare plagued by those accusing eyes that Patton realizes this can’t go on. He has to know what it all means, or he might go mad with the questions that swarm his mind.

--

The next night Patton foregoes his bed in favour of slipping out of his room into the quiet halls of the facility, the files tucked away in his jacket. Sweat beads down his forehead, the familiar thrum of electricity inside the walls only a faint comfort. Although he only needs to make the barest effort to make the security cameras divert from him, the action still makes his hands shake. As he sneaks into the elevator at the end of the hall he inspects the buttons. You need a special pass to go to the very lowest level. But Patton only needs to send a pulse of electricity into the elevator to make the security system think he’s been granted access. As the doors close Patton swallows. No going back now.

The elevator ride feels both too long and too short. When finally the doors glide open to reveal a long hall Patton fastens his pace. He passes other closed cells, some of which he hears murmurs from behind their closed doors, but he does not slow down until he reaches the door at the very end of the hall. Door 409… Holding the highest level of security prison cell they have.

He glances backwards for a second, before he takes a deep breath and places his hands on the door. He feels the electricity answering as he redirects the flow. It’s hard. Harder than the vault in the lair, harder than tricking the elevator had been. Sweat starts to bead on his forehead, as he carefully has to divert his powers through layer upon layer of security, careful in case he triggers an alarm somewhere.

He isn’t quite sure how much time passes, but at long last the door finally, finally opens. Patton enters, and quickly slides the door closed again. His heart hammers in his throat as he presses his hands to the door and listens for the sound of the alarm going off.

It doesn’t come. He had done it. Exhaling a shaky breath Patton leans his forehead against the metal door, cooling his flushed skin.

“Well, well, well,” A smooth voice drawls behind him. “Look what the cat dragged in…”

Patton’s shoulders tense. He had hoped to never hear that voice again. A part of him is tempted to leave, but the files pressed against his chest still burn. So he gathers all his courage and slowly turns around.

The cell in the middle of the room is a monstrosity of glass and metal, bare apart from a simple bed. The security system surrounding it buzzes with the sheer amount of electricity it needs, making it dizzying even to Patton. It is only a small distraction however from the person all that electricity is holding prison, standing in the middle of that glass cell with his arms crossed at his back. Like he had been expecting him.

“My sincerest apologies for the mess. I wasn’t expecting such important company,” Janus grins. “Should I feel honoured that the famed Heart Shock is visiting little old me in my cell?”

Patton swallows. He had hoped that the villain would have been less frightening now, pulled away from his usual shadows and dragged into the light for once. He wasn’t. If anything the simple white prison grubs he wore instead of his usual black suits and the bright LED lightning only enhances how alien, how otherworldly he really is. The green scales trailing down his sharp face, the fangs glistening in that all too familiar mocking grin, the tall willowy frame that nonetheless packs a surprising amount of strength… The man in front of him is more monster than human. Patton wonders for a second if he ever was human to begin with.

“Oh, look at you,” Janus chuckles softly as the silence between them stretches on. “Like a frightened little mouse in the snake’s den… Whatever will he do now?”

Patton puffs out his chest indignantly. “I’m not afraid of you!” He says, ignoring how Janus raises an eyebrow with an amused smile. “I’m not! You have no power here! You’re our prisoner!”

“Really?” Janus mockingly drawls. “Well, pardon me for not believing you whilst you look like that.”

Patton belatedly realizes what kind of picture he paints. Pressed up against the door, as far away from the glass as he possibly can. Not exactly the fearless superhero everyone expected him to be.

Closing his eyes for a second, Patton takes a deep breath and steps forward. Cautiously he approaches the cell, his footsteps in sync with Janus’ until they both halt at the glass, right in front of each other. Patton stares up at his nemesis, more confident than he feels. Right into the mismatched eyes who have haunted his nightmares for almost a week now. He swallows, clenching his fist to hide that they’re shaking.

“While I’m definitely thrilled to have you here,” Janus smirks down at him. “I’m afraid I’m a very busy man, and don’t have time to have a staring contest with you. To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Patton opens his mouth to ask what the heck he would be busy with, he’s a prisoner, but stops himself. That’s a discussion that would lead him nowhere, and he came here with a purpose.

“I’m here to talk with you.” He says instead.

“Congratulations, you just did,” Janus yawns, a forked tongue lazily flicking out from between sharp fangs. “If that was all, darling-”

“No! I mean-” Patton zips open his jacket and pulls out the files. “I’m here to talk about these.”

Janus’ eyes narrow when he spots the files, the only outward reaction he shows. Yet the temperature between them seems to drop to freezing level.

“I’ve never seen those before in my life.” Janus says airily.

“I found them in your lair!” Patton counters. “In a hidden compartment in the wall!”

“Did you now? How interesting.” Janus lazily inspects his fingernails. Patton frowns as he spots Janus’ left arm is completely wrapped up in white bandages. He can’t recall that they gave him an arm injury. He opens his mouth to ask, but shakes his head. He had to focus on this.

“These are your plans!”

“No they’re not.”

“Oh yeah?” Patton flips open the files. “Then how do you explain your name on top of these papers?”

“Can I help it that ‘Janus’ is such a popular name?”

“These are all written in your handwriting!”

“Preposterous. My handwriting is much neater.”

“All your old plans are in this, and some future ones!” Patton shouts exasperatedly.

“Pure coincidence.”

“Stop,” Patton grits out through clenched teeth. “Stop denying! I know these are yours!”

“If you’re so sure, why ask me at all?” Janus disinterestedly brushes away some invisible dust from his shoulder. “Why haven’t you immediately shown them to your superiors, like the good obedient lackey that you are?”

“Who says that I haven’t?” Patton responds heatedly.

With a growl Janus suddenly throws a fist against the glass, his eyes flashing dangerously. Patton jumps backwards, his throat squeezing shut before a startled scream can escape him.

“Don’t. Lie. To me.” Janus spits. “If you had shown them, you wouldn’t be here chatting with me in the middle of the night. Admit it.”

“I… No.” Patton finally shakes his head, gripping the files tightly between his hands. “No, I didn’t…”

“There we go…” Janus draws his hand back and crosses his arms again behind his back, his easy smile back. “Tsk, tsk, tsk, Heart Shock. Have your masters never told you it’s bad to lie?”

Patton bites his lip. It was true that he’d be in so much trouble if his superiors ever found out that he lied. But surely they would understand him lying to their enemy, wouldn’t they?

“You’re one to talk!” Patton says instead. “You lie all the time!”

“Says who?” Janus drawls with a mocking smile.

“Says me! You lied every time we fought, you just lied multiple times to my face-!”

“No I didn’t.”

“-And you lie in these files!!” Patton shrieks, waving the files in front of the villain’s nose. Janus’ smile falls and his face darkens.

“Oh? Pray tell, Patton.” Janus sneers, and Patton snaps back in shock at hearing his actual name coming from the villain’s mouth.

“H-How did you-?”

“Why exactly would you think I lied in these files?” Janus tilts his head. “If I wrote them, that is.”

“Because... Because-!” Patton flips angrily through the files. “Because these files say you used the money you stole from the hotel fundraiser two years ago to finance black market medication research!”

The hero looks up triumphantly, expecting Janus to laugh and simper about how gullible he is for believing such an obvious decoy. Janus however doesn’t laugh. He shows not even a hint of his mockery as he silently listens. Patton’s triumph falters, and he flips once more through the files to avoid that calm gaze.

“A-And here!” Patton pulls another paper from the file. “In here you claim that you kidnapped the scientist Emile Picani because the AEP made him design weapons, not new mental health robots!”

Still no response. Patton scowls as he holds up another paper. “This says you destroyed a construction site for a new factory because the output would pollute the town’s only water resource!”

“They were also exploiting the builders,” Janus finally interrupts. “Forced them to work under horridly unsafe conditions for barely a quarter of the salary they needed to support their families.”

“Yes!!” Patton throws the files down with frustrated force, making the papers fly everywhere. “You… You… You keep lying in these files, making us appear like the bad guys! Is this what you tell the people? To brainwash them into joining your stupid little gang?”

“Me? Brainwashing? HA!” Janus shakes his head. “That’s a laugh and a half…”

“I’m onto you, Deceit!” Patton proudly puffs out his chest. “I see right through your tricks!”

“Oh, of course you do,” Janus smiles down at him like he’s a child who just badly solved a puzzle game. “Nothing gets past you. Truly, I’m so impressed.”

Patton’s certainty wanes. Villains who just got their plans exposed should look angry, not like they’re secretly laughing at you.

“Well, if you’re done spouting wild accusations, would you mind closing the door behind you?” Janus stretches his arms above him. “I want to get my eight hours of sleep in before I get thrown into the next torture session tomorrow, thank you very much.”

“Torture-? Oh, haha, very funny!”

“Not joking, unfortunately-”

“Why do you do this??” Patton has to resist to stomp his feet in frustration. “Why do you keep on lying?”

Janus lowers his arms, his smile falling away. “I don’t.” He says. The seriousness of his voice throws Patton off, but even so he scoffs.

“Yes, you do!”

“I really don’t. There’s not a single word in those files that isn’t the honest truth.”

“Yeah, right,” Patton crosses his arms. “Tell that to the people outside! Or to my superiors!”

“Oh, by all means, bring them in,” Janus says seriously. “Bring them all in! Your precious masters, all my supposed victims… I think you’ll find that they’ll all agree with my side of the story.”

Patton opens and closes his mouth a few times, uncertainly. The rigid seriousness of the other makes him more nervous than he hopes he lets on. He was so used to the dangerously charming smooth talking Janus that he had no idea what to do with this calm, somber Janus. Oh, why hadn’t he taken Logan with him? He would have known what to say!

“Oh really?” Patton eventually says, sounding more sure of himself than he actually was. “What exactly is ‘your side of the story’? Go ahead, I could use a laugh!”

“You want to know, little mouse?” Janus says, and just like that the dangerous smile was back. “You really want to know?”

Patton swallows, but tilts his chin up defiantly. “Yes.”

“Well, you asked for it…” Janus hums thoughtfully, gathering his thoughts for a second. “My side of the story is about how years ago a small company gained interest. Funded by the richest of the rich of the world this company created unwilling abominations. Children reared only to use as weapons to hold the world hostage. So that those richest of the rich could create a planet where the lowest of the low were forced to work for them. Leeching of the world’s natural resources like parasites, while the rest of us peasants suffer as a result. Of course, that was the system even before these children became their shiny new atom bombs, but now… Now they had safeguard. A safety net that ensured no one would ever dare to rebel against them. Well…” Janus smiles. “Almost no one…” Janus inspects his fingernails casually again. “Of course, to make sure they wouldn’t be bothered by such things as icky morals, they justify their actions by saying it was for the greater good! By saying this system created…” Janus raises an eyebrow at Patton. “An Endless Peace?”

A silence falls between them. Then Patton lets out a disbelieving laugh.

“Really? You think I’m going to believe that? I’m not dumb, you know!”

“Dumb, maybe not,” Janus shrugs. “Naïve, however…”

“I don’t believe you!” Patton says proudly.

“You were born and raised at AEP, weren’t you?” Janus asks. “Told from a young age you were born to be a superhero? To help people? Tell me Patton, have you ever been away from this building for anything else than superhero business? Or talked to anyone who isn’t approved by EAP first? Anyone at all?”

Patton tries to think of an answer, but comes up empty. “The people in this building protect me,” He answers instead. “Protect me from people like you, who would exploit my powers for evil!”

“Trust me honey, you’re not the one who needs protection out there…” Janus mutters.

“I don’t believe you.” Patton repeats, a bit more uncertain this time.

“Fine. Don’t then.” Janus shrugs. “I don’t need you to believe me for it to still be true.”

The absolute confidence in Janus’ voice infuriates Patton, anger bubbling up in his chest.

“EAP is a good company! We actually help people, unlike you!” Patton yells, now actually stomping his foot. “You stand there trying to tell me you’re so noble, when you have NO PROOF for anything you claim!!”

“Proof?” Janus growly lowly. “You want proof? Fine!” Angrily he grabs the edge of his bandages and starts unwrapping his arm. “I’ll give you proof!

Patton inhales a sharp breath as Janus unwraps the last bandages. His arm is completely raw and swollen, oozing with barely healed wounds. His stomach turns at the sight of angry deep black burns strewn over any flesh that got spared.

“They tore the scales off my arm,” His cool façade finally shows cracks as Janus’ voice shakes. “One by one they ripped them off my skin. Even when I finally talked they didn’t stop. They continued on until my arm was bare, and the iron they placed in the fire was white hot. That’s how I got these…” Hovering his fingers over one of the burns he swallows. “Obviously I told them old hiding places, long since abandoned. It will keep them busy for a while, but when they realize I’ve given them old information…” He rubs his jaw absentmindedly. “They said they would take my teeth next. Too bad... I’ve grown quite fond of my fangs.”

“They…” Patton shook his head, unable to tear his eyes away from Janus’ tortured arm. “They wouldn’t do this…”

Janus’ eyes turn cold, his collected mask back on. “Obviously, they did. Or do you think I would do this to myself to gain sympathy points with delusional so called ‘good guys’?”

“B-But-!! We are the good guys!! The people, they love us-!”

“Oh, please,” Janus rolls his eyes. “The only reason the ‘common’ folk sing your praises is because they’re too afraid that their ‘beloved rulers’ send you to destroy their homes next.”

“T-That-! That’s NOT true-!!”

“Do you know what they call your little ‘hero��� group outside of the little circle of rich assholes you protect?” Janus says with a nasty smile. “They call you ‘The Executioners’. Because the minute someone refuses to obey, to fall in line… They send you. To make sure the people know who’s in charge. To destroy any ounce of happiness they scraped up and make an example out of the corpses you and your friends leave behind in their wake!”

“Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!!!” Patton shakes his head, covering his ears in a vain attempt to block out that damned smooth voice.

“Face it, kid. You’re no hero. No… You want to know what you are?” Janus continues on mercilessly. “You’re a tool. A sharpened axe the elite of the world hold over the necks of the common people, so they continue working as proper frightened little drones. Nothing like a good threat to keep their servants from revolting against them.”

“YOU’RE LYING!!” Patton screams as he throws his fists against the glass, the lights above them flickering in sync with his outcry. His powers bursts out of him with a force he hasn’t experienced since he was a kid. Electricity climbs over the glass cell in living lightning, framing the villain like a cursed portrait. But Janus barely blinks as the electricity crackles around him.

“If you are so sure that I’m lying… Why are you still here?” He asks thoughtfully. “Why come here at all if you truly think I lied in these files? Unless…” Janus says slowly, understanding dawning on his face. “Unless you’ve already seen the cracks in their pretty façade. Is that it?”

Just as quick as his power had acted up it retreats. “I… I… I don’t know what you’re talking about…” Patton stammers as he pulls his hands away from the glass, the bright glow of the electricity dying in his fingers. He steps back but Janus follows, like a shark that smells blood in the water.

“Oh, that’s it, isn’t it?” Janus breaths out a disbelieving laugh as he shakes his head. “When did you start to notice the holes in their logic? Started to taste the bitterness in their pretty lies? How long have the doubts been eating at you, Patton?”

“That’s not…” Patton starts weakly, but any other rebuttals wither and die before they can leave his mouth.

“You’ve seen glances of their true faces,” Janus continues. “And you hoped that I would what? Comfort you? Deny everything and let you wallow in your own self-denial? Be the so-called ‘villain’ you think I am so you can continue feeling good about yourself?” Janus chuckles, lowly, the sound wrapping around Patton’s throat like a noose. “Come now darling… Did you really think I was that kind of person?”

It distinctly feels like something inside him breaks. The pretty wall of his superhero persona crumbles and crashes down, leaving Patton with only the ugly truth that wall had kept hidden from him. The pride and praise of the past week now suddenly tastes like bitter ash in his mouth.

He hurt people. He hurt the world. He did he did he did he did he DID-!!

He can’t take any more. Patton’s legs give away beneath him as he crumbles in front of the glass, his chest heaving with sobs. Pulling his hands through his hair he buries his face in his knees, tears dripping down his cheeks. Janus says nothing while Patton’s sobs echo in the room. He only stares down at the shattered hero at his feet with a distant kind of satisfaction.

"What do I do...?" Patton eventually whispers when the tears finally slow. "What can I do to make this right…?"

Janus grins, kneeling down to look the hero straight in the eye.

"You could start," He purrs. "By getting me out of here."

--

Patton walks through the halls he’s walked through a thousand times. His heart hammers a mile a minute in his ears, almost deafening him. Yet it can’t keep him distracted from the person currently running after him, sticking out amongst the grey walls like a sore thumb in his bright white prison grubs. They halt at an intersection, pushing their backs against the wall and holding their breath as soldiers run past in the next hallway.

“I’m going to need your phone.” Janus suddenly whispers, making Patton bite back a yelp.

“I-I don’t have one-!” He stammers. Janus gives him a long-suffering look.

“I’m not surprised, yet somehow still disappointed.” Janus sighs as he impatiently moves past him. Just as Patton wants to ask what he’s planning, Janus darts out of the dark corridor, as quick and ruthless as the snake he is and grabs the last soldier in the platoon that passes them. He gives her no time to alert the others in front of her as Janus covers the soldier’s mouth, drags her back into their corridor and sinks his teeth into her neck.

“What are you doing?!” Patton hisses.

“Making sure we can get out of here!” Janus hisses back as he pulls his teeth from the soldier’s neck. The woman’s eyes are already drooping, despite her effort to raise her voice in alarm. By the time Janus lowers to the ground she has fully lost consciousness.

“You can’t do that!! She’s just doing her job!” Patton furiously whispers as Janus searches her pockets.

“Yeah, well, currently her job would be to shoot me on sight, so excuse me if I would rather not die!” Janus finally victoriously pulls a phone from the soldier’s pocket. Grabbing the soldier’s hand for a second to make her unlock the screen, he then furiously starts texting.

“What are you doing??” Patton repeats, just as frantic.

“Arranging our getaway ride, if all goes well,” Janus says as he finishes the text and hits send. “Now we just need to get out of here and keep hidden until they can come for us!”

“Right… Right!” Patton nods. Oh, why did he do this again?? “I know how we can get out of here! We’ll have to follow-!”

“Patton?”

Patton freezes at that familiar voice. Turning he comes face to face with Virgil, wrapped in his favourite hoodie and sleepily rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hand. How could he have forgotten his teammate’s insomnia? Or his habit to wander around until he got sleepy??

“What are you doing here in the middle of the night?” Virgil yawns. “Do you want a lecture from Logan about proper sleep schedules? Because trust me, they’re not very-”

Virgil freezes as Janus rises to his feet behind Patton. His eyes dart between him and Janus, gasping as he finally spots the unconscious soldier on the ground.

“You…” Virgil’s voice turns dark, the shadows behind him moving on his unspoken command. “I don’t know how the FUCK you got out, but you will step away from my teammate RIGHT NOW and get back to your cell, or you’ll regret it!”

“No thank you,” Janus smirks. “While I thoroughly enjoyed your hospitality, the room service here is positivelyabominable. Not to mention the horrid excuse you call cuisine. I don’t think I’ll return here soon.”

“Oh, we’ll see about that!” Virgil growls, gathering his famous shadows in his hands.

“Virgil, NO!!” Patton screams and steps between the two before Virgil can throw his attack.

“Patton, get out of the way!”

Patton shakes his head. “No! You have to let us pass, Virge!”

“What do you mean-?” Virgil stops, furious disbelief etching across his face. “…It was you… You helped him escape-!”

“I…” Patton swallows and nods. “Yes, yes I did… But Virgil-! It’s not what you think! We’ve been lied to, Virge!”

“Yes, by HIM!!” Virgil points at Janus, who wiggles his fingers in a mocking wave. “You know, the enemy that we’ve tried to capture for literal years??”

“No, not him! The AEP! They’re the ones who lied to us! They’ve been using us, Virge! They used us to… To attack innocent people! We’ve hurt the world instead of saving it! We have to set this right!!”

“What the hell are you talking about-??”

“Virgil, please,” Grabbing Virgil’s hands in his Patton gives his teammate- No, his best friend- a pleading look. “Come with us! Help me take down the organization! They’re the bad guys, Virge! It was never him!” Patton gestures to Janus.

“Oh that’s fine, just talk about me like I’m not here.” Janus mutters.

“We can fix this, Virgil. You and I!” Patton says, fragile hope growing in his voice. “Please, trust me on this! Let’s run away together from this place and actually help!”

Virgil stares at him, the tense silence stretching on in the hallway like a wire slowly growing taut. Virgil’s eyes flicker between him and Janus indecisively. Patton hopes for a brief second that maybe, just maybe-

His stomach drops when Virgil’s gaze remains on Janus, and just like that the wire snaps.

“You…” Virgil snarls. “I don’t know what lies you fed him-”

“Virgil, please no-!!” Patton pleads, but Virgil shoves him aside.

“But I will not let you get away with it!” The shadows behind him move again, answering their master’s call as they gather around him. “I will take you down for this!!”

“Must we?” Janus sighs exaggeratedly before he straightens himself and grins his lengthening fangs bare. “I suppose I have time in my busy schedule to teach you some manners, Stormcloud.”

Virgil growls and aims his hands towards Janus, the shadows behind him brewing and moving in dark colours without hesitation. Patton doesn't think. Later on he wishes he had. He doesn’t remember moving, yet he sees his hand grab onto the back of Virgil's neck. He doesn't want to see the sparks fly out of his hand, making the Virgil’s body go rigid before promptly becoming weak in his grasp. But it doesn’t matter what Patton wants, as Virgil's body hits the floor with a thud quieter than it should've been.

Paralyzed Patton makes eye contact with Janus over Virgil’s unmoving form. The other man stares at him dumbfounded, uncertainty and shock fighting for the same place on his eyes. Patton looks down, trembling.

Oh god what had he done.

For the second time that evening Patton felt his knees give way beneath him as he fell next to his friend.

“Virge…” Patton whispers, pained regret shaking in his voice.

“Patton-!” Janus walks up to him, putting his hands on his shoulders but Patton barely feels it.

“I’m s-so sorry-!!” Patton sobs over his friend’s unconscious body.

“Patton.” Janus says, his voice so calm that Patton’s muddled mind readily clings to it. “We have to get out of here. Now.”

“I-I c-can’t j-just leave him h-here-!!”

“You must. The commotion must have alerted someone. This place might be crawling with guards soon. We have to go.”

Patton looks up in Janus’ eyes, their mismatched colours strangely grounding him and he nods. Janus helps him to his feet, and after one last look towards Virgil, Patton turns and they run.

Much later Patton would look back on this night and barely remember their escape. He leads Janus through the facility on automatic pilot, only managing to avoid capture because of Janus’ vigilance and sharp hearing. In the end Janus has to take out only one additional guard, who had been watching the emergency exit that Patton had lead them too. This soldier went down much easier than the first one. Patton supposed he hadn’t expected anyone to come to the quiet, halfway forgotten exit. But how could Patton forget it? He and Virgil had used this door as kids to escape from training once in a while.

Virgil…

Janus hastily runs through the emergency exit with Patton closely following behind. The cold night air finally shakes Patton's mind awake, away from the phantom feeling of Virgil's neck and how his hand tingles slightly. He almost wishes the tingle hurt.

They run loudly on the pavement, aiming for speed over secrecy. Patton’s breath comes in heavy pants and his lungs prickle, yet he dares not to stop or to look back. When they reach the high fence it takes Patton’s every bit of concentration to stop the electricity singing in the fence, guiding it away from Janus as they climb over it.

The sirens start as they safely land on the other side of the fence.

With the alarms blaring behind them Patton follows Janus to where the concrete leads into worn-in dirt, and where that leads to sticks, leaves, and not many traces of society. Patton's breath hurt in his chest, but knows he can't stop for a moment. He doesn't bother looking behind him either.

After what feels like hours but were more likely minutes, Janus skids to a halt, his breath forming clouds in the cold air as he leans heavily against a tree. Patton leans his hands on his knees, catching his breath. In the distance the alarms continue blaring.

“D-Do…” Patton gulps, exhales. “Do you think we’re safe…?”

Janus looks at him. “I don’t know…” He says, and Patton hates the raw honesty he hears in his voice. He suddenly much prefers the smooth lies his former enemy could spin at a drop of a hat. If they’re caught, he'll suffer Janus' previous fate or worse. Patton doesn't want to think about how it could get worse.

Just as he’s about to sit down, resigned to his new fate, a bright spotlight illuminates their spot in the forest. Patton can’t stop the startled scream as spots dance in his vision at the sudden brightness, the rumbling of an aircraft above them finally overpowering the sound of his wildly beating heart. They had found them already??? Or…

“Ahoy down there!” A nasally voice shouts down over the intercom as a rope is lowered from the aircraft. “Did some clown order a clown car??”

Patton puzzlingly frowns, but besides him Janus grins.

“Hold on, Heart Shock!” Janus grabs the rope with one hand and throws his other arm around Patton’s waist to hoist him up close. “Our ride is here!”

Before Patton can form some kind of protest the rope is hoisted up. A high-pitched shriek tears from his throat as the ground falls away beneath them. Patton never liked flying or heights in general. No matter how many times Roman took him for a flight he never got used to it. So he throws his arms and legs around Janus koala style and buries his face into the other man’s scaled neck. He dares not to peek as they dangle above the ground until he feels hands grab him and Janus. Excited voices ring in his ears as the hands drag them both into the aircraft. As they land on the metal floor with a heavy thud a blush creeps in on Patton’s cheeks when he untangles his arms and legs from Janus’ frame.

“Snake Daddy is in the nest!!” The same nasally voice shrieks over the roaring engines. “HIT THE GAS!! GO GO GO!!!”

The door behind them slams closed, and the aircraft flies off with a speed that throws Patton backwards, making an inelegant roll on the hard metal floor. Janus on the other hand sits up his knees, giving the man that runs up to them an exasperated look.

“Didn’t I tell you to stop calling me that?” Janus sighs. The man gives him a grin that makes his moustache curl up mischievously. Either Patton’s eyes are deceiving him, or the man resembles Roman to an uncanny degree.

“And I told you to get used to your new codename, Double-D!” The man joyfully says. “Deal with it!”

Janus rolls his eyes, but nonetheless grabs the hand stretched out to him. As he’s pulled to his feet Janus throws his arms around the other.

“Remus, you absolute insane wonderful man you,” Janus breathes shakily. “How the fuck did you get here so fast?”

“Are you kidding me??” Remus eagerly returns the embrace. “We’ve been hiding around here for five days now!”

“You what-” Janus reels back, grasping Remus by the shoulders “Why??”

“To rescue you, of course!”

“Oh for fuck’s sake- You promised that if I ever got captured you would continue where I left off! Not risk everything by trying to rescue me!”

“Yeah, well,” Remus shrugs. “You promised me that I would get to watch you use the president’s head as a football some day! And god fucking dammit, you are not getting out of that promise, no matter how hard you try!”

Patton flinches at the gruesome fantasy, but Janus only wetly laughs and draws Remus back into a hug. Over the whole aircraft relieved and excited voices ring, welcoming Janus back.

Amidst the excitement Remus halts as he finally spots Patton, who still sits quietly amongst the excited rebels.

“No fucking way…” Remus breathes. “You actually got us a hostage?”

Patton freezes. As all eyes turn to him, he suddenly remembers again that he’s surrounded by people he previously thought as his enemies. And to them, he still was the enemy.

"Double-D, you should've warned me you would bring a hostage! I would've brought the rougher rope with us!" Remus pulls away from the hug and quickly moves towards a container, which once opened Patton could see was full to the brim with rope of various colours, each appearing thick and rough enough as they were.

Janus dramatically sighed. "He’s not a hostage."

Remus stops rummaging through the container and quirks an eyebrow. "But Heart Attack or whatever is one of those stupid guys! Wait.” Remus squints suspiciously at Janus. “Don't tell me you're breaking up with me and joining his side."

“Not quite,” Janus says as he extends a hand to help Patton to his feet. As he stands Janus lightly places his arm over Patton's shoulders. A shield against the suspicious glares from the rebels around him. "You see, my darlings… He's joining ours."

[turtletimewriting]

TickleTober Day 8: Interrogation

Summary: The dark sides have been planning something big for their big holiday coming up. The light sides can’t handle the anticipation and intervene. 

Note: Tickle fic! Lee Virgil, Remus and Deceit. Ler Logan and Patton. No clue why I excluded Roman but here I am! I’m really happy with this one! 

_._._

“Now. This can be really simple. We just want a few questions answered. That’s understandable. We’ve been very confused due to your changes in behaviour. We would be very grateful if you just simply told us.” Logan tilted his head and kept his body language open. 

“Screw this! Right! You’re all tied up right now. Can't move. Can’t hide. Can’t do anything. Doesn’t matter if you tell us anything. We can keep you all here all day.” Patton harshly clapped his hands. Pacing around the bed while side eyeing the three dark sides tied to the bed. His face strained into a harsh neutral expression. Utterly completely totally unaffected by the three wobbly smiles and tiny giggles from the three typically serious dark sides. 

“We’re not saying anything! Torture us all you want! We’ll never talk!” Remus wailed. But Patton immediately saw an entirely different story. He wouldn’t make any eye contact and his smile refused to dim. 

“Hey! We’re all reasonable here! We just want to know what you lot are all planning? A simple question! We don’t need this... senseless violence.” Logan held his hands up to Patton. 

“No...” Virgil muttered while still trying and failing to hide his face in his arms. He had already seen this routine. 

The light sides had attacked with no warning. All the dark sides were lured into the commons room by the amazing smell of lunch but the next thing they knew, they were tied down onto a plush bed. All of them tied with their arms above their heads and their feet tied to the end of the bed. Each of their feet tied to the neighbour’s. Virgil was sat in the middle with looser restraints than the others but that didn’t stop the fact that his left foot was tied to Remus’ foot and his right with Janus. His most ticklish spot still bound completely at their mercy. 

“We’re not getting answers!” Patton cried out and threw his arms up. Making the most of having his back turned from them so he could smile in excitement. 

“We’re reasonable! I’m sure they’ll tell us if we explain our confusion and worry..”

“No. We grab the weakest. Virgil will be the most... vulnerable to our... techniques but Remus is most likely to spill their secrets without realising. But Jan is definitely the head of operations. Meaning...” Patton slowly turned around. His face carefully set in a peering gaze. 

“We should just grab Remus first!” 

Lurching forward, Patton launched his claw attack at Remus’ armpits first. Not a very ticklish spot but enough to get him laughing. The surprise and the set up for this attack was all too much for his already weak defences. “AAAAAAAAAAAH! AHaAHAHAHAAHAHAHA! HAHA!” Remus stood no chance. 

“You got anything to say now?” Patton growled.

“Now now Patton. Patience is key!” Logan laughed in the middle, almost shaking his head at how ridiculous all these dramatics were. He smoothed his hands over Remus’ armpits like he was trying to stop Patton. But he made sure that his ‘uncertain’ movements tickled in of itself. “He’s just too ticklish to go all out once for.”

“Hahahaaaaa! Hu... hahahaaAAAHaha! Oh come on! Hehehhahaaaaa! Logan! You’re ti- hahhahahaa tick- hahaAAAHAHAA. TICKLING ME!” Remus shook his head already knowing he’s been defeated. 

Janus knew this tactic. He knew it well. Once Remus got talking while being tickled, he couldn’t stop. He’d ramble about anything. But they were one step ahead. They had a plan B for Remus if he was targeted but... now in the moment. Janus was grimacing already knowing that Remus would resort to the plan B instantly, he’s always been weak for tickles.  

“GEHE- GET JANUS! He’s hahhaHAHAHAA head of it all! Hahaha! HA! HA! Get his hhahahaaaaaa his tummy! He’s extraragaahahahaha! Extra ticklish there! PAHAHAATTON! You love tickling him!” 

Welp… there it is. At least he had the decency to give away a less ticklish spot. 

“Oh yeah? So now all of a sudden you want to talk! Selling out your friend? Logan?” Patton tilted his head and Logan immediately took over from him. Skittering his fingers across Remus’ armpits. Making sure to give him light tickles to change from Patton’s brutal digging. Just some light feathery tickles to keep Remus talking. Patton jumped excitedly over Virgil to blow a raspberry against Janus’ ticklish tummy. 

“NOOHOHOHOHOHHHOOOOO! HAHAAH HEHE!” Janus tried to lash out but he only succeeded in jostling Virgil who was looking more and more nervous and getting increasingly giggly. 

“You want to talk? Say anything to Remus,” Patton tried to lure out more information. Before diving in and delivering plenty of more raspberries, obviously. 

“HAHAHAAAAAA! DON’T YOU HAHAHA DAAAARE!” Remus squealed, somehow laughing harder at Logan’s gentle tickles. 

“Hohohaha oaaahhhaha! We’ve hohhhohohho not done AAAOHOHOHHAHAO anything!” Janus finally stammered out. Patton let a peaceful smile finally uncurl. 

He always loved Janus’ laugh. It sounded like an evil villain’s laugh as he revealed his grand plans. Chesty laughs that sounded like they were almost punched from him. Like he hadn’t laughed in years and it sounded fake and theatrical but it was completely real. It went just so nicely with Remus’ frantic squeals, cackles (that was the only way to describe his laugh) and shrieks. 

But that means that there was someone’s laugh missing. 

“We just want to help you out! I don’t want to see you tickle tickle tickle tortured for the rest of the evening. Virgil is most likely to spill what you’ve planned. If you tell me how to tickle him-” Logan soothed.

“NO! Don’t you dare Remus!” Virgil shrieked. 

“If you tell me how to tickle him then this could be over quicker... We can help each other out!”

Remus managed to hold it together for a grand total of ten seconds before he sent a desperate look to Janus before crying out “SIDES! SIDES! HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAAAA! HA! Sides and hahaAAHAHAA spreading out fingers thing...” 

“No! No!” Janus cried and lifted his head up. 

Both Logan and Patton completely broke character at hearing Janus’ shout. He blushed bright red at the sudden attention but continued on.

“No, don’t tickle him! Uh, what about my knees? Patton you l-love ti… tickling my knees! I just can’t stand it... your tickles.”

It was the most suspicious thing ever. Clearly they knew Virgil wouldn’t stand a chance. So if they were true interrogators then surely they would instantly set their targets on Virgil.

But...

Janus never ever asked for tickles. So... well who would they be if they didn’t tickle someone who was asking! 

“AAAAAH! HA! HA! HA! HA!” Janus bellowed out his sharp distinct laugh as Logan and Patton took a knee each. Patton desperately scrambling all over while Logan took carefully planned out squeezes. Remus laughed at him while Virgil was dying from his blush from nearly being tickled. 

“Aw! You want some tickles huh? Lots of tickles all over your cute tickly knees!” 

“Patton...”

“You just knew I can’t resist tickling your knees, cutie! They’re just so so so ticklish! I could tickle them for years!”

“Pat.”

“Since you asked so nicely, saving Virgil and everything, you deserve all the tickles! All of them! Tickles all over your legs for the good cute giggly snake boy!” 

“Patton! Good cop, bad cop...” 

“...Oh yeah! Uhm.... This is what you get! You deserve these tickles for annoying me so much! No more sass young man!” 

Logan smirked as he saw Remus finally catch his breath and Virgil loosened up. He kept his eyes on the knee he was tickling but just as the laugh was getting more strained and the gasps getting harder, he flung himself to Virgil. 

“AH!” Virgil squeaked before remembering to clamp his mouth shut.

“I’m on your side here,” Logan said as he Virgil squirmed underneath him and sent pleading glances to Remus. He wasn’t even tickling him yet. Just sitting there. “You could just tell me now. I’d understand! What are you planning?”

“Hehe...” Virgil just giggled while burrowing away in his arms. 

“Oh tough guy are we?” Patton shouted over Janus’ laughter and skittered his fingers across Virgil’s foot. Only a brief skitter. But Virgil burst into laughter! Oh he was this keyed up already! 

“NOHOHOHOOO! KEHEEP TIHICKLING ME! HOHOHEHAHA!” Janus managed to spit out.

“Wait! I uh I’ve got an itch on my foot! Logan do you mind tickling it for me?” Remus and Janus practically yelled over each other. But it was too late, Virgil had already spoken. But also, Logan already had a plan in motion.

“Hah... no problem Remus...” Logan grinned. He kept his eyes focused on Virgil and then reached out to tickle Remus’ foot, sending him into giggles, and then spidered his other hand on Virgil’s tummy. Virgil squeaked but used all his strength to hide just how much that tickled. 

“Neh! Hehee! No! Focuhuihihihehehe! Focus on me!” Remus shrieked, the giggles slipping out without any problem. Logan didn’t react other than his hand pausing before just tracing a finger along the ball of his foot. A single finger. Scribbling from one side to the other. A tiny tickle so he could now focus on amping up Virgil’s tickling.

“VIHI VIRGIL!” Janus shouted, he could already see the tell tale signs of Virgil giving in. Yes, he wasn’t laughing yet but the blush and frantic squirming spoke a completely different story. 

“Virgil? Please, I just want to understand! Just one detail, that’s all I’m asking for. Then you can be free! Otherwise, I’d have to give you up to Patton. You don’t want that, surely?” 

“Pfthahahaahaaaaaa! Aaaaaaah! Logan!” 

Patton looked up at his name but his determined frown took over. Oh, so Logan was expecting Virgil to break first... Well, the rare competitive side of Patton instantly broke free. 

Janus was bright red now for a different reason. There was only so much he could be tickled before even he had to give in. He wasn’t bothering to hide his face anymore. Just laying back with his head thrown back. He looked like he was relishing in the tickles. “HA! HA! HA!” 

“Huh, Logan’s after the info. I forgot that’s what I’m supposed to be doing.” 

“NOOOOO HOHOHHAAAA!” 

“Seeing you being tortured, makes me want to keep you here forever. Even if you tell me what you’re planning, I’m still going to get your feet. So funny that a snake’s favourite ticklish spot is his legs huh!”

“WE’RE PLANNING A HALLOWEEN PARTY ON THE 30TH!” Janus no longer cared. He huffed desperately before continuing, scared that Patton wouldn’t be satisfied, “We were going to jump scare you all, that’s why it was on the 30th as you would all expect the 31st. I was going dressed as Logan, Remus as Roman and Virgil was going dressed as you. It was Remus’ idea!” 

“Hey!” It was at this point that Janus realised that literally everything had stopped. Remus’ bubbling giggles, Virgil’s snorting huffs, Logan’s baby talk and Patton was sitting completely still. With a huge smile!

“Janus what was that!” Virgil gasped.

They hadn’t created a plan to stop Janus from breaking because he never ever he broke by tickling. Janus was just too strong and could deal with tickles so much better than anyone else. Well, he used to be able to deal with any tickles. They had plans for Virgil and Remus! But no! Janus just had to sit there and be the focus of all the tickles! 

Patton sat there for another silent moment before giving himself a high five and wooping loudly.

“HAH! I knew I could break Janus! No one else could, but I knew I could if I gave it an honest go. Yes! Quick go tell Roman!”  

[turning-the-frigging-frogs-gay]

Underneath The Spotlight- A Sanders Sides Fic

Taglist: @sophiexteresa

Chapter 9- I’ll Be There

(Read Chapter 1 here!)

Read here on ao3!!

A/N: we’re past the halfway point now! Thanks for all your support so far, sorry for the long wait for this chapter <3

Warnings for this chapter: repression, anxiety and stress

Before anyone knew it, it was the interval. Everyone was making the most of the short break they had, and the dressing room was just as frantic as it had been while the performance had still been happening, with everyone preparing costumes and accessories for the second half of the chaos. Remus had somehow managed to smudge all of his makeup again, and a scene was unfolding as Janus attempted to reapply it.

“Remus, you have to stay still or I’ll just smudge it even more.”

“I think it looks better smudged!” he huffed, as he refused to un-crinkle his eyelids.

“Well, I believe the teachers would beg to differ!” Janus almost hissed as he once again leaned over Remus, trying to apply his eyeshadow as the other teen squirmed.

“For the love of all that is holy, stay still!”

“Never!”

“Remus!”

Janus sighed as he finally gave in. “It’s not great, but I think that’s the best we’re going to get.” he said with a small chuckle as Remus blew a raspberry at him, thus ruining his lipstick once again.

Patton was sat quietly, preparing some of his costumes. The second half had some of his favourite routines that he couldn’t wait to perform, and it was smooth sailing for him now... well, mostly. He still had that back-to-back costume change that’d gone so horribly wrong at tech rehearsal. What he had to accomplish seemed impossible. He’d had bad costume changes before, but this time, Patton had officially deemed it “too much”. He liked to think that dancers like him always found a way, and Patton almost believed that maybe he could’ve been ready in time earlier if they hadn’t lost his shoe. However, in the darkness and panic backstage, mistakes like that were very easily made and one tiny slip-up could ruin the whole operation and Patton’s whole next dance. His mind wouldn’t stop racing through what-ifs and the anxiety was eating him alive. He tried to push it down- he knew everyone else was stressed right now, and no one wanted to hear him whining like a baby- costume changes like Patton’s really were nothing uncommon in the world of dance. He’d just have to deal with the anxiety, and when the time came, hope for the b-

“Patton? You’ve been awfully quiet,” Patton almost jumped as he felt his boyfriend’s hand on his shoulder, pulling him out of his trance.

“Hey, Jan,” Patton said quietly.

“Are you alright?” Janus asked gently.

“Yeah, fine,” Patton said, not meeting his eyes.

Janus raised an eyebrow, not buying Patton’s act.

“Wh-why are you looking at me like that? I’m fine, I swear!” he held his hands up in self-defence.

“You really think I can’t smell a lie a mile away?”

“Janus-“

“You know you can tell me anything, right? Patton, please don’t suffer in silence.”

Patton sighed, defeated. “I’m really nervous. My costume change went terribly earlier, I don’t even know if it’s possible... I’ve put my heart and soul into this show and I just really, really want to get it right. And the anxiety is killing me... isn’t that silly?” he looked at Janus sheepishly, who gave him a sympathetic glance.

“No, Patton, that’s not silly at all. After how hard you’ve worked, you just want this to go perfectly. I get it, I really do.” He pulled Patton into his lap once again. “But you are... aware of the nature of your costume change?”

“Aware? It’s been haunting my nightmares for months,” Patton said with a small chuckle.

“Put it this way, if I had to do this, I’d be nervous,” Janus said. “You’ve gotten seriously unlucky... but,” he gave a quick glance to Logan’s spreadsheet (which had proved extremely useful), mentally reminding himself to thank his nerdy friend for making it later, “I’m going to be there for you. I have a short break, and I’m going to be there.”

“Janus, you don’t need to-“

“I’m going to help you. Are these the shoes and hat you need? And is this the jacket?”

Patton nodded nervously.

“Perfect, I’ll bring them, and I’ll be there. I promise. Mark my words, Patton, I will get you on that stage on time.”

Patton knew Janus was making promises he probably wouldn’t be able to keep, but he really appreciated his boyfriend’s efforts to help him feel better. Although he was less nervous now, his anxiety wasn’t gone altogether, but he was left with a glimmer of hope.

“Us dancers always find a way,” he said to Janus, looking up at him with a smile.

“That we do, Patton. That we do...”

“Hey, look, look!” Remus said, pointing to the TV, which had been yet another useful addition to the dressing room. “The second half’s started!”

The others came to look at the screen, and they were right- the stage was once again alight with a performance. Upon noticing this, Roman immediately grabbed a hairspray can and quickly sprayed his hair, before fixing his outfit in front of the mirror.

“I’m on next,” he said, as he checked his laces. “I should probably go.”

“Good luck,” Logan said. “Not that you’ll need it,” he added more quietly.

Roman blew a kiss to Logan on his way out to avoid spoiling his lipstick, earning a few fake gagging noises from Remus and Virgil.

Roman promptly exited the dressing room with everyone else staring after him before continuing to prepare for their own dances in the second half.

Here we go again, Patton thought...

Next chapter

[harrylee94]

Log Entry XXXXXX - Chapter 5

Summary: A new space station, complete with the most high spec and up to date technology there is to offer, has been set up at the edge of the known universe, a new way point for explorers to keep in contact with the rest of the human race. It has been carefully designed by the best scientists and engineers Earth could offer, and now 7 brave souls are being sent out to ensure everything works perfectly.

However, when Logan wakes from cryosleep from the journey, he is informed that several things are now in need of repair, though everything had been in perfect working condition when the station had been reconstructed before he and his crew had arrived. They will have to solve the problems they’ve been left with before the station is up and running, and yet Logan can’t help but feel he’s done this before…

Relationships: Intrulogical (Remus/Logan)

Warnings: Blood, Gore, Parasites, Remus having an overactive imagination, It’s an Among Us crossover so there will be bad stuff afoot.

A/N: The ending was heavily inspired by this post, which I loved so much I had to include it!

For those of you who don’t know, this story is based off of a comic by @fangirltothefullest which I HIGHLY recommend you check them out on the link above! Their art is AMAZING.

Note to everyone before we begin; there will be graphic descriptions of gore, dismemberment, possibly torture, and any other awful things that come with the territory of writing a story in an Among Us universe.

Link to; Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

To read it on AO3 please click here.

Chapter 5: Log Entry #59

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 6:17 AM

Logan was tired. He’d lived the same six hours over fifty times now, give or take an hour or so each time, and not once had he been given a chance to rest. Though his body might have been able to handle the strain this time loop was creating due to its very nature, his mind could not. He had snapped at Remus for the first time today, had pushed him away before Remus pushed past his defences and held him close until he told him what was going on with the briefest of explanations.

Remus had become a Host to one of the parasites no more than five times, the lowest number of all the others barring himself, mostly because Logan had been with him almost all the time save for those four instances when they'd been separated, and yet, despite knowing that time had been reset, making the last run essentially non-existent, Logan still couldn’t bring himself to trust the man he loved most in the world until those arms were around him. He felt disgusted with himself for ever doing so, and the guilt still riddled him for being so frozen when it had happened that first time, but the experience took its toll.

The worst time had been when they had been forced to vent him, sending the feral creature in Remus’s form shooting into space. Logan had watched as he’d drifted slowly away, his body expanding, a small splatter of blood escaping his lips as the oxygen was pulled from his lungs, rupturing them, until he grew still. Waking up after that, despite knowing that the real Remus had been dead long before that moment, Logan had hovered over Remus as he recovered from falling out of his cryotube until, after that initial contact, he clung to his partner and sobbed into his shirt for a long time.

It was a similar situation to the one he was in now actually, sitting in Remus’s lap as the man hummed, swaying back and forth and rubbing at his back. He wanted to sleep here, to just drift off and forget all of this was happening. He needed to recharge, but he couldn't.

“I can tell them that the cryosleep messed you up,” Remus suggested softly, pressing a kiss to his hair. “We can say that you need time to recover and you can stay here and sleep.”

Logan shook his head. “But then everyone will die.”

“Sounds like we do anyway,” Remus said. It was supposed to be comforting, or at least reassuring that taking a break would be okay, but Logan couldn’t help but to flinch. “Okay, not the right thing to say, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re burning yourself out.”

“I can’t stop.”

“You have to.” Remus held his face softly in his hands. “Why don’t you go back to sleep? Rest. Recuperate. Even I know I have to stop every so often or I’ll crash worse than the Hindenburg.”

“I can’t leave you to face this alone,” Logan said, leaning into his hand.

“You’re not. You’ve told me what’s happening and where to find the information I need to prepare.”

“That’s not the same.”

“Well I’m not letting you leave this room.”

Logan scowled at his boyfriend. “They will kill you. They will pull you apart, shred you from within, vent you into space, turn you inside out-”

Remus stopped his words with his lips. Logan hated how he still couldn’t resist this, that he would still kiss him back with desperation when he knew it was a distraction, but he couldn’t resist. These moments were sometimes few and far between, and he clung to them like a man starved of affection.

“I would die for you a million times if I had to,” Remus said against his mouth as he pulled a little away, even as Logan followed him. “I can see how tired you are. Sleep.”

Logan shook his head. “I can’t. I won’t.”

“You have to, or you’ll collapse.”

“Then I’ll collapse.”

“Logan!”

He huffed. “I won’t be able to anyway. My body is well rested.”

“That’s what drugs are for,” Remus said with a roll of his eyes.

Drugs? “You mean sedatives?”

“That’s what I said.”

Even though Remus was giving him one of his many smirks, undoubtedly a little proud of himself, Logan could see the worry etched into the faint lines by his eyes and the edges of his mouth, even in the way his fingers were still holding onto his face a little harder than usual. Remus was scared for him and that was just about enough to convince him.

“Janus is in charge of the mission,” he said after deflating with a sigh. “Patton and Virgil are usually the targets of the parasites, though I haven’t been able to figure out why yet, just that they have been most frequently chosen as the hosts. Orange is usually the first victim, probably because he is the one with the most advanced knowledge of the reactor and the engines. And work with Roman when you can; I know you can be a formidable team when you get past your differences.”

Remus nodded to each point, even if he looked disappointed at not being chosen to be the new leader, and rubbed his thumb over Logan’s cheek. “You’re making the right decision.”

“The only right decision I’ve made since this started was telling you,” Logan said and turned his head to kiss Remus’s palm. “I could never regret you.”

“I love you too, Lo,” Remus said, pressing a kiss to his lips again. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“I know,” Logan replied, unable to keep his sadness from tainting his words. “You always are.”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 6:00 AM

Logan woke with the rising light of the fake dawn. The sting of the needle from the sedative had vanished, and the tingle of the cryosleep still sat in his muscles. He sighed, closing his eyes as he remembered his last conscious moments and smiled to himself when he heard the familiar thump of Remus falling out of the cryotube. The sound was more comforting than he thought could be possible, especially considering Remus was getting hurt every time, but it was a confirmation that Remus was there, that even though all these horrible things were happening, he was still able to have these moments with the love of his life.

He did feel more rested now, even if not recovered completely (though he doubted there would be much that would help him recover from what he was experiencing), and he heaved his still aching body up to look down at the one that was groaning on the floor with a fond smile.

“You’re supposed to wait for your blood flow to return to normal,” he said, voice gravelly as it always was just after waking.

Remus groaned again and looked up with a squint and a blink before he rolled over and grinned up at him. “Hey, beautiful,” he said, his voice sending shivers up Logan’s spine. “Did they make a mistake at the gates of heaven, because I’m pretty sure I’m meant to be roasting with a spit up my butt right now and not looking at a beautiful angel.”

Logan grinned, blushing a little. “Are you sure I’m not some sort of demon here to trick you into Hell?”

“I’d follow you anywhere; heaven or hell” Remus said, and Logan hummed at the sound of awe the man made.

“I know you would,” Logan said, only for his smile to fall a fraction. “I’ve already led you to your death.”

Remus blinked at him again. “Huh?”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 7:06 AM

“How many of those notes have you made?” Remus asked as Logan walked with him towards the storage room, having decided to start his journey there this time.

“Fifty-two,” Logan replied, waiting for the bar to finish loading while absently picking up the empty fuel container to set Orange up for refuelling later. “I have, unfortunately, been unable to make notes in some instances, though I have made up for some of those delays in future loops.”

“And you’ve relived this day…?”

“This will be my fifty-ninth time,” Logan replied, setting his tablet aside so he could fill up the container.

Remus whistled. “And you don’t even know how many times we’d gone through the loop before!”

Before? Oh, he should have thought of that. It was entirely possible that the first time he could recall living through this ‘cursed’ day (if he was using the expression correctly) was not in fact the first time he had lived it. No one else could remember after all, and he had not made any notes the first time, so there would have been no proof left behind.

“It’s getting kinda full there, Logie.”

Logan flinched and quickly turned off the tap before the container could spill. “I… had not considered that.”

“Well it kinda makes sense, doesn’t it?” Remus said, screwing the cap onto the container and pulling Logan’s hand into his. “Do you think anyone else will remember? One of the aliens maybe!”

“Please, don’t even suggest that!”

“Sorry.”

Logan took a deep breath to calm himself and banish the thought of an even more challenging experience, and nodded. “It’s possible.”

Remus hummed and gave his hand a squeeze. “Can I look at the notes?”

“Of course.” He reached for his tablet and handed it over without looking at the screen, prying his fingers away so he could go in search of the next container.

“Um, how many notes did you say you’ve made?” Remus asked, the light of the screen reflecting on the surface of his visor.

“Fifty-two,” Logan replied, finding the container behind a box. “Why?”

“Because there’s fifty-three.”

Logan paused. “... What does the last one say?”

“It doesn’t say anything,” Remus said. “It’s a video, but it says I have to access it in Communications.”

A video? “You must have made it. I was asleep all of… yesterday.”

“Should we watch it?”

“I think we all should.”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 7:18 AM

“I don’t see why you couldn’t have done this earlier,” Orange said as he leaned against the wall, arms folded across his chest. “We’ve only been here for fifteen minutes. I haven’t had the chance to do anything yet.”

“Fifteen minutes is plenty of time to set up a deep space communications network,” Janus chipped in. “It’s not like we’ll need it or anything.”

“I am well aware that I am causing a great frustration to all of you, but I must insist on everyone watching this,” Logan said, still searching the system for the file.

“Haven’t we got more important things to be doing?” Virgil said. “Fixing the Station, maybe?”

“This is important,” Remus said, and Logan smiled. He’d stationed himself next to him, keeping watch on their team to make sure none of them would leave without making them feel trapped.

“Why?” Roman asked, suspicious.

“Because it is.”

His skills in defending this argument needed a little work though. At least now he’d found the file, and he opened it. A video file opened on the main screen as a black box, the play button waiting to be clicked.

“What’s the video about?” Patton asked as Logan stood up from his chair to allow everyone to see.

“I don’t know,” he replied softly and, taking Remus’s hand, pressed play.

For a few seconds the screen remained blank, only a timestamp in the corner counting the seconds giving any real indication of time passing as heavy breathing could be heard.

“Twelve thirty?” Janus said, looking at the numbers. “But the system-”

Whatever the man in yellow was about to say was lost as there was some rustling and the camera was uncovered. It was the Communications room from the perspective of the screen; the lights were off, but the screen was giving off enough light to reveal the mess the room had become. They couldn’t see the floor, but they could see that the door was closed, and there were streaks of what had to be blood across the wall.

And then there was the figure. Remus’s fingers tightened in Logan’s as they watched him haul Janus’s torso from the desk to set him down on the ground, the eyes already milking over. The body left a stain on his green suit, and when he looked back at the camera, it revealed that the visor on his helmet had been broken, a chunk of it missing entirely. He huffed and quickly removed it, tossing it aside.

He looked pale, his eyes holding an edge of mania, and his entire right ear and a section of his hair was missing dripping blood down his chin, which they saw with more clarity when Remus turned his head, his eyes on where the screen must have been. He laughed.

“Oh man, they got me good,” they said with a cracking voice, and Logan noticed a few side-glances towards them, but he was more focused on how the Remus on the screen was trembling ever so slightly. “Shit. I’m not going to have time to start this again, so uh, I’m sorry you had to see... “ He looked down at where he’d just put Janus’s body and swallowed. “They’ll be here any minute. I’ll be torn to shreds for sure.”

This laugh was broken and he sounded so close to snapping. “You told me! Patton and Virgil, you said. I kept an eye on them, but then Orange…” He shook his head. “Fuck. Fuck! Why did I let him leave?”

There was a bang on the door behind him and he spun around, but quickly turned back. “Rambling. Shit. They’ll get through-- I read all your notes. All of them. You’ve been through some fucked up shit, Logie! I mean, I believed you when you told me, but when I read it… This loop is fucked up.”

There was another bang.

“Oh Re~mus!” It was Patton’s voice, still so familiar and joyful, and yet punctuated with another hit to the door. “Come out and play!”

Remus had shut his eyes, leaning against the desk. “I watched them pull Roman’s heart out of his chest,” he said, a tear dripping from his cheek. “Janus is… Well, you saw that. Orange is scattered across one of the Engine rooms and they…  they found you. They took you and they made me watch as they put you in the trash shoot and--” He cut himself off as another bang rattled the door and looked up into the camera, eyes filled with tears.

“You had to do that to me once. I don’t know how you survived. It felt like my soul was being torn out of my chest when I watched you die.” He wiped at his cheeks, wincing as he caught the torn flesh, but otherwise he didn’t seem to care. He looked down again, his face hidden by his hair. “I don’t know if this will even work, but I wanted to leave a note, like you do.” When he looked up again his face was scarily blank.

“Log Entry number fifty-three. The parasites have taken Patton and Virgil as hosts again. It was in the Medbay. They went after Janus first, as he was alone. There’s evidence they played with him before they pulled him in two.”

“Who are you talking to, Remus?” came Virgil’s voice from beyond the door. “We’re the only ones left.”

Remus stalwartly ignored them, eyes fixed on the camera. “Orange and I found the body. He left to fetch the fuel so we could try to burn whatever they are. I heard his screams when I found Virgil, or the thing he’d become, with Roman. My brother had been pinned to the wall by its tentacles, and it ripped his heart out as he begged for mercy.”

Another thud, this one louder than the others before it, and Remus flinched.

“They must have run out of energy or something, because they only captured me and dragged me into Storage. The Thing with Patton’s face had dragged your body off the shuttle. You were still asleep when they stuffed you in the trash shoot. I… I couldn’t tear my eyes away. I must have screamed myself hoarse.”

He looked over his shoulder as the metal of the door groaned with the next hit, then turned quickly back.

“I somehow managed to escape, though not before they did this.” He motioned to his missing ear. “I ran everywhere. I think I must have slipped in Orange’s blood when I found what was left of him in that Engine room, because I left footprints. This is the first room I could find without vents. You mentioned vents a lot.”

The door groaned again and bent a little behind Remus, but he didn’t look this time. He just smiled.

“I wish I could have done more. I wish I could have saved you, but… I know I’ll see you again. I’ll wake up and fall out of the cryotube and I’ll make you pesto pasta for breakfast just to try to make you smile. You’ll tell me about this fucking time loop and I’ll believe you, because I know you. I know you would never lie to me about this. And I will tell you I love you. I’ll tell you that you mean more to me than life itself. I’ll-”

The door behind him tore open, the metal shredding like cardboard, and the figures of Virgil and Patton stepped through. Remus tried desperately to reach something on the desk but he was pulled away by Patton, who had barely moved, before he was given the chance. Remus’s helmet flew at Patton before Janus’s followed, and the wheely chair started to move across the screen as Remus yelled profanities at the creatures.

Virgil and Patton, meanwhile, had begun to unfurl, their tentacles escaping and their bodies splitting into gaping maws.

“Now that wasn’t very nice,” Not-Patton said as he pulled a struggling Remus up into the air by his foot, even as he continued to try and fight. A second, third and fourth tentacle stretched out to hold him still, and still he struggled.

“Fuck you! Fuck both of you! You dickasses both deserve to-” Remus’s shouts became muffled as Not-Virgil covered his mouth and gave the struggling man a considering look.

“You know, you’ve always been so fond of medieval torture,” it said. “Why don’t we try that, what was it? Ah yes, being hung, drawn and quartered.”

“That sounds like fun!” Not-Patton said. “Let’s do it in the cafeteria. The tables are better there.”

Not-Virgil nodded with a double grin and helped drag the screaming Remus from the room.

It took Logan a few seconds to remember how to breathe, staring at the screen as the silence around him threatened to engulf him, but then Remus pulled him closer and gave him the best hug he could while they were still in their suits. Logan clutched back at him, turning away from the screen as Remus continued to stare at it over his shoulder, and his entire body flinched when his own agonised screams came from the speakers.

“So-someone turn it off,” Remus said, shaken but still standing strong somehow.

There was some shuffling and the screams suddenly cut off, making the silence somehow even more unbearable. Remus gave Logan another squeeze.

“That… that can’t be real,” Virgil said after a few more moments, the edges of panic staining his words. “I’m not… Patton and I…”

“Remus?” Roman said, and Logan pulled away from his partner enough so they could both turn towards the rest.

They were all in various states of shock or disbelief; Patton had tears streaming down his cheeks, Virgil was clutching at his body, Janus looked to be trying to figure out if it had been an elaborate joke or not, and Roman looked blank. Orange, however, was the only one to look somewhat angry, which Logan thought was fair considering the circumstances.

“It’s real,” Remus said, his eyes still on the screen as he spoke but they landed on his brother soon after. “Everything I… he said is true.”

“You can’t expect me to believe that,” Orange said with a snort. “It’s very clever though. Did you set it up before we left Earth?”

“He can’t have.” Janus said hesitantly. “The plans for the Station were kept confidential, to be released to the public after we’d already left, and no one else would have helped him gain access.”

Orange frowned. “That… That can’t be right. If it was then…”

“Is everybody okay?” Patton asked beyond the tears.

“Oh yes,” Janus drawled. “I absolutely love watching one of my best friends get dragged away to be tortured and killed. It hasn’t affected me at all. Especially not the part where he had to drag my own lifeless body away from the camera.”

“... Yeah, me too,” Patton said softly, and he leaned into the hand Roman had set on his shoulder. “How is this possible?”

“Remus was talking to Logan in the video,” Roman pointed out.

“I don’t know,” Logan said. “I… I haven’t been able to find an answer. There must be some sort of… rift or something. A black hole near our orbit that’s distorting the flow of time. There is so much we don’t know about them after all, and it’s possible, but I haven’t seen any that would be close enough to cause any real changes to the environment. Perhaps it’s the parasites themselves, but that doesn’t make any sense or they would remember as well, and that hasn’t happened. Not yet at least, and I hope it never does.”

“It won’t,” Remus said, and Logan graced him with a brief smile.

“Believe us or not, this is still a problem,” he continued. “The parasites only take a host after 9:30am, though I cannot tell you the exact time as it changes depending on a variety of variables, but it is always near the Medbay or the Reactor. I suspect they might be found in the vents but I cannot be certain.”

“Oh. Great,” Virgil said, Orange having to step to his side to guide him into the chair, He immediately ducked his head between his knees and Logan could hear him trying to control his breathing. Patton was at his side a moment later to hold his hand and help guide him through his breathing techniques.

“Perhaps we should have a codeword!” Roman suggested with forced charm. “Something to say to each other so we know if anyone’s… you know.”

Logan shook his head. “It wouldn’t work. The parasite essentially becomes us once it’s in our system. The host knows that it’s a host, that it was once human, they just don’t care anymore.”

“And how would you know that?” Janus asked.

“I’ve… been one, once,” Logan replied quietly, looking away as Remus’s hand squeezed him in comfort. It was really a miracle that he hadn't been caught again, and it had been a close call on a few occasions, but somehow that first time had remained the only time.

“What do you propose we do then?” Orange asked.

“We stick together, get through as many tasks as we can to get the Station back to full operation before the creatures emerge, and find a way to get them off the Station.”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 10:35 AM

There had been no sign of the aliens. It had been an hour since they should have appeared, and yet there had been nothing but a growing sense of dread and, in Orange's case, annoyance. It was becoming increasingly clear that the engineer was growing impatient, and that his belief in the credibility of the video was tenuous at best. The further notes on what Logan had been able to assess from his observation of the creatures had not helped either, though the others had been enough to keep him satisfied for a time. However, it seemed that his patience had finally run its course.

"Look, you guys can all huddle together like scared little bunnies," he said, as they waited for Virgil to finish sorting out the medical supplies, "but we have a job to do, and we can't do it if we're doing everything one bit at a time!"

"Kiddo, we're trying to-" Patton started, but Orange huffed and started walking towards the door.

"Spare me," he spat. "I'll be in the engine rooms if anyone needs me, doing my job."

With that he stormed out of the Medbay, heading out of sight around the corner. Logan, who had been taking notes about their situation on his pad on the bed nearest the door, looked after him and didn't even blink when the door shut immediately after. He wouldn't have been able to reach him in time either way. He turned back around and gave Remus a look.

"That… that was you, right, Sherlock?" Roman asked as his brother heaved the mattress he'd been lying on off the bed frame. The lights went out a moment later and Patton squeaked in alarm as the room plunged into a pitch darkness.

"No," Logan replied, glancing up at the fading glow in the bulbs. "No it wasn't." He turned back to his pad and started to hack into the door to open it again.

The mattress hit the floor.

"Shit, where's the vent?" Remus cursed, and Logan could hear him dragging the mattress around.

"Over here." Janus.

"Get away from it," Remus growled, even as he dragged the mattress closer.

"Be careful," Patton said from next to Virgil, the two of whom were the only people visible thanks to the faint light of the isolated test lab.

Remus grunted and, after some sounds of shuffling, the mattress flopped down heavily again, this time with a slight echo.

"Got it," Remus said after a little more shuffling. "How are the doors, Lo?"

Logan tapped a few more keys and had the door ready to open. "I'll open it when you get here. We don't know if they're waiting for us out there."

"You mean Orange might be-?" Roman asked, but couldn't bring himself to finish.

"I believe it is all but certain," Logan confirmed, and he heard someone -- probably Patton or Virgil -- whimper.

There was some more shuffling and Logan turned his screen around to shed some light on the room. From the shadows cast and the sight his suit could offer him, he could just about see Roman coming slowly closer, his arms outstretched so he wouldn't go into anything. Janus, Remus, Patton and Virgil were all clustered as a group, Remus keeping his hand on Janus's shoulder as he glanced back at where the mattress (and therefore the vent) must have been while Virgil seemed to twitch at every sound.

Once everyone had reached him Logan slid off the bed and joined the cluster. "Let's go."

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 10:52 AM

Walking around so close together was not only cumbersome but also a little claustrophobic. Logan could hear every breath, every footstep, feel each unexpected touch and each slide of shoes against his own. Patton and Roman would occasionally whisper the breathing exercises to Virgil to keep him from panicking too much, but otherwise it was a slow walk in near silence.

They had walked through both engine rooms on their journey to Electrical, and while it was dark, there had been no sound of Orange on the entire journey. It was all but certain that he was now a Host. Now, however, they had all stopped to look into the ominous darkness of the room before.

"This doesn't feel like a trap at all," Janus said.

"Do you think Orange might be in there?" Patton asked.

"Either that, or the second parasite is lying in wait," Logan replied, squeezing Remus's hand. "Either way, something has to be in there."

"So someone's either going to end up becoming a big tentacle monster with a mouth that tears their body in two, or they're going to end up as a kebab," Remus said with a nod. "I think I'd prefer kebab myself."

"I would prefer it if neither situation happened," Roman said, Virgil making a noise of agreement.

There were a few seconds where nothing happened, but then Logan sighed and released Remus's hand to step forward; or at least he tried to.

"What are you doing?" he asked, Remus's hold having only grown stronger.

"I'm not letting you go in there alone."

"Who said I was doing that?"

"You did." Remus caught his shoulder and turned in to face him. "You're never silent in group projects."

Logan clenched his jaw. "You know me too well."

"You know me better," Remus said with a slow grin.

Logan huffed in annoyance but turned back to the others. "The fuse box is at the back, next to a vent," he said. "If we stick together and keep an eye on it then we should be able to get through this easily enough."

"And if Orange is in there?" Virgil asked.

Logan shared a look with Remus (as much as he could in the almost complete darkness anyway). "We will have to… take action."

"... Oh," Virgil said, sounding a little queasy.

In a way Logan envied their naivety. He envied their ability to hope for a better solution, their expectations of getting out of this alive, but his own experiences had worn that away. He had always been defined by the truths and facts that had become his life, but now even that was being worn away, and he knew he was becoming more jaded in each loop.

"Let's get this over with," Roman said, bringing Logan out from his thoughts.

The scientist nodded and pulled Remus after him into Electrical. "The fuse  box is just around-"

The door slammed shut, cutting the couple off from everyone else.

“-... the corner.”

Remus stepped closer as a few bangs came from the door. “We’re dead, aren’t we.”

Logan swallowed. “Yes.”

Remus hummed. “These aliens; they take on our memories when they take us for a host?”

“I… yes, that’s right.”

“And we just want to kill everyone in sight.”

“Yes,” Logan replied, trying to block out the noises that were coming from outside the door. He needed all of his senses if he was going to get them both through this, though every calculation he was making was only leading them towards one bloody and awful end. “You’re just… angry, and there’s this hunger, and you crave it. Nothing from before matters. You simply loath humanity.”

Remus hummed again, and they both froze when they saw something moving in the dark. Logan was so focused on it that he barely registered the click-hiss that came from beside him, from Remus, and he only understood that he had removed his helmet when he was shoved back into the wall behind them.

“No!”

He could see it happening, the lights of the Medbay blinding in his memory as Remus threw himself forwards, but this time he would not be frozen. There was shouting coming from the other side of the door as he pushed himself off the wall, chasing Remus into the dark, but when the love of his stopped short and Logan crashed into his back, he knew he was too late.

“Remus,” he breathed, catching him as his knees gave out and holding him close as he choked on his own blood. “Oh God, what did you do?”

Remus grinned. “Saved… you.”

There was no time to argue, and the smile fell quickly to a cough as the parasite ravaged his body, making its home inside him. “Yes. You saved me, Remus,” he said, all but tearing his own helmet from his head. “It’s okay. It’s going to be okay.”

He kissed Remus’s blood spattered lips and carded his fingers through his hair as the door opened, ten seconds too late.

“L-Love… yo-you,” Remus stuttered, only to choke, his body stiffening as the shaking began.

“I love you too,” Logan said, vaguely aware that the others were talking, that someone was moving, and a second later the lights were on again.

There were tears streaming down Remus’s cheeks, and tears running down his own. He could see the patches of red where the parasite was chewing away at Remus’s body, seeping into the fibres of the suit, and Remus struggled with himself until he roared in pain. Logan watched as it clouded his eyes, his gaze only briefly leaving his partner’s when Roman tried to come to their side, but was mercifully held back by Virgil and Patton.

“It’s okay,” he muttered as Remus’s body slowly went limp in his arms. “I love you, Remus. I love you. It’s going to be okay.”

The dark threads he had seen before started to seep from each blood-soaked spot, crawling out to start encompassing Remus’s body, and he choked on a sob, holding Remus closer. All too soon the body was completely encompassed, and the shape in his arms congealed with the pressure he was exerting with his arms. Someone tried to pull him away but he shook them off.

“I’ll distract him,” he said, though the tears threatened to choke him.

“Logan-”

“Go!”

There was only a brief hesitation before they left. He tried not to think of the anguish in Roman’s eyes.

As the mass in his arms solidified back into the shape of his lover, his strands of hair growing back between Logan’s fingers, he looked into those eyes that he had grown to love and saw the brief flash of recognition.

“Logan…” Remus said, the pain gone but the fear he had seen before still hanging onto its last threads, but then even that was snuffed out, and all that was left was a growing hunger. The grin that stretched Remus’s lips grew inhumanly wide as sharp tendrils extended out from him to puncture Logan in every way possible. He gasped as he clung to Remus’s form, vowing to never let this happen again.

“You smell delicious.”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 6:00 AM

Logan woke with wet cheeks. The light of the cyrodeck had never felt so cold.

[deadanddeactivated]

Other Friends

Fandom: Sanders Sides, Gem AU Pairing:   Analogical Characters: Virgil, Patton Notes: Day 5 of the fluffuary event being hosted by @tsshipmonth2020​​ - Analogical.   Summary:  Here they are in the future and things are bright. Even if they aren't perfect. And then things aren't bright.

Prologue Comic AO3

--

One moment Logan is laying on the hill behind their house, staring up at the sky and thinking about how far they’ve come.  He’s lost quite a lot, and gained quite a lot, and a thousand things have happened in between.  

But Logan thinks that, perhaps, it’s finally over.  They are all together, with no one hunting them down.  There will always be a hole in his heart, but Logan thinks he can be content with that.  He can live on.

The next moment they’re flung back as something slams into the earth.  

“Boys, are you alright?”  Patton asks, the human scrambling to his feet and to his sons.  Certain they’ll be fine, Logan turns to the thing that made the carter.  

In the dust cloud, he can just make out a humanoid figure.  A gem?  

“What is that?”  He hears Remus asks from behind.  Logan and Dante meet eyes, both equally confused.  What gem would arrive in such a way?  The dust starts to clear and Logan can only stare.  He’s never seen this form before but the Lapis Lazuli is… almost familiar.  

No, Logan admits to himself as storms gather above, the Lapis Lazuli is familiar.  Only last Logan saw him the calf-length robe was not so old looking, not so patched.  He’s never seen the clothes beneath the coat, turn up to reveal the gem on his chest.  There were no dark shadows under his eyes, and his hair was not so dark.

But how can this be?  The gem before his was shattered long ago.  

Wasn’t he?   

“Well, would you look a that.”  The Lapis mocks, glaring at them.  “The misfits themselves.  Romulus’ brats, defective Logan, and Red Diamond's Pearl.  Oh wait, it’s Dante now isn’t it?  Finally go your very own made up name, isn’t that nice?

“That’s not possible.”  Logan is thinking it but Dante says it, both still frozen to the spot as the purple Lapis Lazuli scowls at them.

“Oh but it is, no thanks to you.”  He spits.  “Like the new style?  Though it was time for a change.  Got a new toy too.”  With a familiar purple light, an unfamiliar weapon appears in the gems hand.  A double ended spear, cracked along the wood and tied with ribbon.

“Woo, wait up!”  Roman calls, rushing in front of them despite the arms that reached to stop him.  “I don’t know if you heard but I’ve established peace throughout the universe!”  

“Uh, we established peace!”  Remus adds, although Patton has to tight a grip on him for the boy to run up.

“Oh I’ve heard.”  The Lapis huffs.  “I’ve had you’re little message to the universe on loop.”  Lightning flashes in the grey clouds above them.  Logan and Dante share another look.  The pearl summons his segmented whip but Logan can’t bring himself to follow suit.   He doesn’t want to believe the Lapis is here for a fight.

The sky flashes again and rain begins to pour.

“I just love that part where Red Diamond spends the rest of his days on this nowhere planet.  With his little groupies and stupid humans.  It really sounds like a blast.  Too bad I never got an invitation to the ball.”   This time the lightning strikes the ground, just to the left of Patton and Remus.  Patton shields his son from the dirt it sends flying but Remus is unbothered, cheering at the display of super-charged electricity.  

Roman takes a step forward and Logan sees the Lapis brace himself.  The dumortierite is barely in time, tackling Roman to the ground and out of the way.  

A one half of the spear has already sliced through the place Roman was.  

“What the hell are you doing?!”  Dante demands.

“Being the bad guy.”  The Lapis spits.  His spear raises, catching Dante’s whip and pulling the pearl forward.  

“You and Remus need to get out of here.”  Logan orders Roman, scrambling to get them both up and towards Patton.  

“What?  No!  I can help!”  Roman argues, trying to free his wrist from Logan’s arm as he pulls his sword from his gem.  

“This gem is far beyond your abilities.”  Logan says, shaking his head.  “He was made to keep up with your father.”

“He knew Dad?”  Remus asks, frowning.  “Lo, who is he?”  Before Logan can answer, can try to explain, there's a rough noise from the battle behind them.  

“What?”  The Lapis mutters, a yellow Pearl resting in the grass beneath him.

“De.” Roman tries once more to pull out of Logan’s hand and run to the poofed gem but Logan doesn’t let him.  

“Heh, they don’t even know who I am?”  Lapis asks.  There’s venom in his eyes, so much that Logan gulps.  How is he meant to explain this?

“We thought you were gone.”  Logan tries, even though he knows that’s not good enough.  “Bubbled or shattered by the Diamonds.”

“Why?”  Lapis snarls.  “Because Red told you so?”  He scoffs, kicking Dante’s pearl out of his way as he stalks forward.  “Not much of a rebel are you?”

“Virgil, please, just stop for a moment.”  Logan says, practically begs.  

“Don’t call me that!”  Lapis shouts.  “Get out of my way or I’ll shatter you.”  The gem threatens, weapon raised.  Logan has no chance against him, he knows.  Even if he did call his bow, Lapis is too fast and too strong.  

“You don’t have to be the bad guy.”  Logan says, tone and feet firm.  “Whatever happened, we can talk about it.  Just please, wait.”

“I am done taking orders.”  The gem claims.  “And I am done waiting.”

“Then at least listen to reason!”  Logan tries as Lapis gets closer and closer.  “They aren’t Red!”

The spear slicks through him like butter, Logan utterly unprepared to block the hit.

--

In a puff of dark blue, the gem is gone.  No one stands between Lapis and what remains of Romulus.  Of Red.

Except, apparently, the older human.  He steps up, a gem weapon in his hand.  

“Stand back!”  He orders, voice shaking.  Lapis scoffs.  Pathetic, this guy is there last line of defence?  He raises his spear but something stops him.

Humans aren’t like gems, he knows that.  Something about this swing feels like it’ll be more permanent. 

And for what?

They aren’t Red.   

In the moment, the name of that monster had made Lapis see rage and rage alone.  Now he saw the boys, standing behind their father, and…

And they weren’t Red.  

Anger spiked through Lapis and the storm got denser, rain falling so heavy he could barely see.  He’d come here for his revenge and now he couldn’t even take it.  Stupid Logan.  Even after so many years, the blue quartz still knows exactly how to get into his head.

He leaves the gems on the ground and the boys unharmed, disappearing with his storm.

--

“Great going Lapis.”  The gem huffs to himself, curled up in what he thinks is a cave.  “You can’t even be the bad guy right.  No wonder he didn’t want you around.”

Despite the self-deprecation, Lapis can’t find it in himself to regret not hurting the boys.  It just didn’t seem fair after what Logan said.  They aren’t Red.

Logan.

Lapis sighs.  That’s a whole other can of worms the gem isn’t sure he wants to unpack.  Had Logan really not known he was alive?  The gem had never been one for lying but, well, it has been 6000 years.  Maybe that has changed.

What will he do when he reforms?  Has he already reformed?  It has been a few earth days.

A knock at the cave entrance startled Lapis out of his thinking.  He jumped up, spear appearing in moments.

The smiling face of the human child meets him, the boy as unbothered by Lapis and his spear as he’d been with the lightning.

“Hi!  I’m Remus!”  He greets.

“How did you find me?!”  Lapis demands.  The boy seems just as unbothered by his tone and glare, shrugging and making himself right at home in the cave.

“I don’t know.”  The boy says.  “I just looked.  Pa didn’t want me to, ‘cause he thinks you’re dangerous.”

“I am dangerous.”  Lapis argues.

“Nah.”  Remus brushes him off.  “You didn’t hurt me last time.”

“I could hurt you now.”  Lapis claims.

“Okay.”  Remus said, finally looking at the spear Lapis had used to poof his friends.  There’s still no fear in his eyes.  “Your spear is really cool.”  He says instead.  “I’ve never seen a gem weapon like that before, it looks like it was broken.”

“It was.”  Lapis huffs.  He isn’t sure how, but he spends the next Earth-hour talking to the human child, answering silly little questions and listening to siller little stories.

“You know,” Remus starts and Lapis fully expects another silly story, “I didn’t meet Logan until I was five.” 

“What do I care about that?”  Lapis mutters, whole form tensing.  

“Pa kept his gem on the bench, in this little blanket.  And sometimes he’d put books or candles there, ‘cause he said Logan liked that stuff.  He used to tell me that Logan got hurt and that he just hadn’t gotten better yet.  I thought that meant he was dead.”  Remus just goes on as if Lapis hadn’t said anything.

“Gems only die when we’re shattered.”  Lapis scoffs.

“I didn’t know that then!  I hadn’t met any gems, except Ro but that was just in dreams.”  Remus argues.  “But I found that aren’t, ‘cause one day we were having breakfast and the gem just started to glow, and then it was a man!  It was so cool.”  Remus grins.

“What is the point of telling me this?”  Lapis huffs.

“Lo got poofed later too, after Roman and I ran away to Earth and the Diamonds sent gems after us.  I was so scared he was going to take five years to come back.  He didn’t, it only took a couple of days, and I was so glad, but I thought it was kind of weird so asked.  Pa says I’m curious like that.  And that I talk a lot.”

“I’ve noticed.”  Lapis mumbles, rolling his eyes and trying not to think too much about what Remus is actually saying.

“Lo doesn’t mind.  He likes answering questions.”  Remus claims.  “And he told me that when he got poofed when I was a baby, he didn’t think he was coming back to anything.  ‘Cause the diamonds were there and dad was already gone.  But when he got poofed the second time, he knew he was coming back to me so he wanted to come back.”

“I don’t get what you’re trying to tell me human.”  Lapis finally snaps.  “Why do I care if Logan got poofed?  I don’t.”

“I think if Logan knew you were out there he’d have come back quicker.”  Remus says.  

“You didn’t even know who I was.”  Lapis points out, sounding a lot more bitter than he meant too.  He didn’t care, he shouldn’t have expected any different.  It didn’t hurt.

“I just didn’t know what you looked like.”  Remus explains.  “But Logan’s talked about you sometimes.  He got this far away look and a sad smile.  Like when Pa talks about dad.”

“Yeah right.”  Lapis rolls his eyes.  He doesn't believe Remus.  He doesn’t.  How could Logan not have known?  He didn’t even come to check!

But then, Lapis stood alone in a garden for thousands of years.  All because he believed what Red said.

“Come back and see.”  Remus says, standing up.  “I bet Logan will reform quicker if you’re there.”

“I literally just attacked you all.”  Lapis mutters.  

“Eh, Uncle De did worse.”  Remus shrugs.  He offers his hand, this small, tiny creature.  How is he meant to help Lapis do anything?

Lapis takes it.

--

Stepping into the house is awkward.  Remus pulls him ahead, practically skipping.  The older human is doing… something Lapis doesn’t recognize in a room with half walls while… while Red’s other child paces. 

They both look as Remus and Lapis step in.

“I found him!”  Remus calls, grinning wide like it’s a good thing.  Lapis can only stand there, looking anywhere else as the human and diamond approach.  Finally, when the older human clears his throat, Lapis forces himself to look over.

“You’re not going to hurt my boys?”  The older human demands, eyes narrowed.

“Uh, no.”  Lapis says, then sighs.  He looks from Remus to… Roman.  “I know they aren’t Red.  They didn’t do anything wrong.”  

“Okay good.”  The older human says, nodding to himself and walking away.

“That’s it?”  Lapis asks, shocked.

“I’m really more of a cooker, not a fighter.”  The human claims, moving back to the room with the half-walls.  

”Pa you’re terrible at cooking!”  Remus teases, laughing.

“Okay, I’m more of a lover than a cooker.”  The human corrects.  As the father and son teased each other, the red gem stepped over to Lapis.  Bracing for the worst, Lapis isn’t prepared for what he gets instead.

“What did Dad do to you?”  He asks.  

“He… left me alone for a really long time.  And I guess he told Logan I was shattered.”  Lapis answers.

“Why?”  An ‘I don't know’ is right on the tip of Lapis’ lips but… but that wouldn’t be honest, would it?  Lapis sighs.

“I don’t think he trusted me.  He probably thought I’d run to the Diamonds that second he started doing something dangerous.”  He answers.  

“Would you?”  The gem asks.

“No.  Obviously not.”  Lapis says quickly.  Sure, he was meant to be the realism to Red’s fantasies but Red wasn’t as childish as the other Diamond’s thought.  And Lapis had wanted him to be happy.

Apparently Red never knew that.

Or maybe he was just crueler than Lapis had ever noticed.  He’s not sure which thought hurts more, but neither is feeling him with much rage anymore.  Just an endless ache.

“Do you hate me because of what he did?”  Roman continues the questions and Lapis sighs again.  He wants to, he really, really wants to but…

“No.”  He admits.  “You didn’t leave me there.  Apparently you didn’t even know about me.”  

“Uncle De wasn’t allowed to tell me things.”  Roman says.  “The others wouldn’t let him.  So you shouldn’t hate him either.”

“You know, you’re a lot like your brother.”  Lapis says, noting the endless questions and quick defence.

“Good.”  Roman grins.  Then, after what seems to be a moment of hesitation, he wraps his arms around Lapis’ middle.  “I’m sorry Dad did that to you.”  He mumbles against Lapis’ chest.  For a moment Lapis is too shocked to react.  Then, carefully, he rests his arms around the diamond.

“It’s okay.”  He says softly.  “It wasn’t your fault.”

“It’s not okay.”  Roman argues.  Lapis is shocked to find some of the ache easing.  Just, just a little.  He hugs the boy a little tighter.

“Thanks.”  He whispers.

--

Logan doesn’t magically reform on Lapis’ arrival.  He and Pea- Dante are still in their gems, resting on blankets with opposite colours.  Apparently Remus finds that amusing.  Lapis tries not to focus on them, tries not to worry about what's going to happen when they reform. 

The older human, Patton, helps.  He pulls Lapis into ‘cooking’ and treats him like an old friend, not like someone that almost killed him a couple of days ago.  It’s certainly odd although Lapis has to admit it’s… nice.  

They’re sitting on the couch playing something called ‘head names’ that night when a blue light finally fills the room.  

“Lo’s back!”  Remus cheers, game instantly forgotten.  Lapis can only gulp, watching the blue light go through several forms before settling on his latest one.  His back is turned to them and he raises his hands, possibly fixing up the knot at his throat.  

“Well… I see we are back in the house.  What happened after I-” He cuts off as he turns to see them all.  “Ah, well that was a quick turn about even for Remus and Roman.”  He says.

“Huh?”  Lapis frowns.  

“We’ll give you two some space.”  Patton says, leading his sons towards the front door.

“But paaaaa.”  Both boys complain but Patton is having none of it, saying they’re going to go to Thomas’ new theatre.

“Um…”  Lapis isn’t sure what to say once they’re alone.  A problem Logan seems to share for only a few moments before the blue garnet clears his throat.

“I’m sorry.”  He says.

“You’re sorry?”  Lapis repeats, frowning.  “I just puffed you.”

“Yes, well…”  Logan trails off for a moment.  “Romulus told me you were gone.  That the other diamonds took you away when he was given the colony, because he needed to act like a real diamond.”  He explains.  “I am assuming that’s not what happened.”

“No.”  Lapis mutters, the bitterness coming back.  “He told me to wait in the garden until he came back.  But he didn’t.  I didn’t even… I didn’t even know he was gone until Roman sent out that universal message.  I thought you’d forgotten about me.”  He mumbles.

“No.”  Logan says firmly, taking a step closer.  “Never.  I thought of you every day.  I was thinking about you right before you arrived, in fact.”

“You were?”  Lapis asks, tilting his head a little.  Logan is standing right before him now, staring at him with determination.

“Yes.”  Logan nods.  “I was thinking how content I was with everything, but how there would always be a hole in my heart without you.”  Lapis can’t help but smile a little at the words, a soft blush rising on his cheeks.

“That’s sappy Logan.”  Lapis says, smiling.

“Yes well, I suppose the humans have rubbed off on me somewhat Vir- Lapis.”  He says, quickly correcting himself.

“I think… I think Virgil’s alright.”  The lapis decides.  He leans in closer, pressing his forehand against Logan’s.

“Virgil.”  Logan breathes, like a weights being lifted off his shoulders.  Like a lovers come back to life.

“I missed you too Logan.”  Virgil says.  “So much.”  Leaning into each other, they’re oblivious to the world around them.  They don’t even notice the yellow glow until Dante speaks up.

“Geez, that was a quick turn around.  Even for you lot.”

[nathanieldelatorre-blog1]

❝ in my defence, i was left unsupervised. ❞

[ MIGUEL BERNARDEAU, 23, CIS MAN, HE/HIM, BISEXUAL ] – welcome to the love island villa, NATHANIEL DELATORRE! they’re a COLLEGE STUDENT from NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK and they’re the SYBARITE. people describe them as IRRESPONSIBLE AND RECKLESS, but once you get to know them they’re OPEN-MINDED AND CHARMING. i’d recognize them by their ( constant habit of biting his lower lip when he’s anxious, inappropriate comments at the worst of times, the softness of his smile when he thinks nobody’s watching ). honestly, i think they’re really here for LOVE. (sam, 24, they/them) 

♡ CHARACTER PARALLELS — Jackie Burkhart ( That 70′s Show ) + Joey Tribbiani ( F.R.I.E.N.D.S. ) + Marissa Cooper ( The O.C. ) + Michael Kelso ( That 70′s Show ) + Logan Huntzberger ( Gilmore Girls ) + Cher Horowitz ( Clueless ) + Peter Quill ( Marvel Comics ) + Rachel Green ( F.R.I.E.N.D.S. ) + Ron Weasley ( Harry Potter ) + Romeo Montague ( Romeo & Juliet )

TW: alcohol, sex, drugs, anxiety.

ok, so! basically, nathaniel grew up in new york city. his mother was a gold digger (and never tried to hide it or felt ashamed of it), and she was married about 5 times before nathaniel moved out to the south for college. he only has two half-siblings on his mother’s side, though, as though his mom didn’t truly get attached to her husbands, she did want to be able to pay enough attention to all her kids. 

nathaniel takes after her a whole lot, and it might be why his father (who’s always insisted in playing a part in nate’s life) is constantly rolling his eyes at him and sighing in disappointment. nate’s parents’ marriage didn’t exactly end happily lmao. nowadays, they can be in the same room as each other, but they DO quite enjoy subtly insulting each other whenever they can. nathaniel doesn’t really care, though. he’s close to his mother, and to his father, of whom he’s the only child, and so as long as they don’t like, kill each other or something, he doesn’t really give a fuck whether or not they like each other. they like him, and that’s good enough for nate.

nate loves luxuries so damn much. his dad comes from a very rich family, and works in the banking industry, and is, um, rich as hell. he’s also somewhat young, having gotten nate’s mother’s pregnant when he was twenty-one years old and she was twenty-three.

nowadays, nate’s dad is married to an international lawyer from france who works at the un, and nate gets along with her really well. his mom’s husband, on the other hand? not so much. he’s always complaining about something, seemingly never happy and quite selfish, and nate just...... doesn’t like his vibe.

coming back to luxuries because i started talking about those and got distracted, yeah!!!! nate’s always gonna want the most expensive thing on the menu, without even seeing the prices. he loves fancy(tm) things, and is just!!!!!! a big fan of being rich. not such a big fan of working to get money though, so i was this close to writing that he participated in the show for the money, but i’m gonna be 100% honest with you: deep down, hidden among all these layers of a partying disaster, he is 100% a hopeless romantic.

loves attention!!!!!!!! loves being the centre of attention!!!!!! loves partying and making scenes (both positive and negative) and attracting attention to him!!!!!!! he loves having people’s eyes on him, and like!!!!!!

DRUGS/SEX/ALCOHOL/ANXIETY TW. sometimes feels somewhat stilted when he’s partying (he does have undiagnosed anxiety) and so he does like drinking and getting high a lot to feel more free to do whatever the hell he wants and feel no restrictions. when he’s drunk/high, he especially loves hooking up, and just!!!!! he loves hooking up when he’s sober too, but drunk and/or high nate hooking up isn’t rare tm.

tennis!!!!!! he’s a tennis player and though he doesn’t know yet if he’ll ever be good enough to be famous and get the attention he wants, he hasn’t given up on it yet. he plays in college, which he still attends as he keeps on changing his major, bc he’s highkey scared of entering the real world (relatable), so!!!!! still in college!!!!! and like????? hiGHKEY competitive!!!!!!! bc he wants to be the best because that means more attention and stuff hehe. (sorry i started saying hehe ironically and now i cant stop ergoieroigerijgerji hehe)

yeah i think that’s what matters most rn!!!!! i’m about to start working on his about page right here, but i wanted to post the intro first <333333

[scrapbookofsketches-blog]

The second part to that Deceit thing

I'm lazy, so again no title. First part it here.

Not really any warnings that I see but I could be wrong.

This is basically about Deceit getting caught by the sides in the Consciousness and him trying to figure out what to do.

~

Deceit was running. It way daylight and Virgil saw him and he's going to go tell the others and they're probably already awake and there going to lock him away and take back the food and then Defence and all the others won't eat today-

Why did he do that! Why did he go into Virgil's room. He should have known that he wasn't going to be the same person he was in the Subconscious. Of course he'd been changed!

Running down the hall past the lights’ rooms. He could hear Roman singing in the shower, Patton humming to himself in his room. He couldn't hear Logan but he’s probably just a quiet person getting dressed. Deceit will slip past all of them and he won’t come back for a long time. Coming up here in the first place was a mistake; seeing Virgil was a mistake; and staying so late into the morning was certainly a mistake. He was really cutting it close and he wasn’t out of danger yet.

As Deceit rounded the corner to the kitchen, he saw the worst thing. His previous rationalizations about Logan getting ready were very very wrong. He froze.

Logan poor down his cooking utensils from cooking breakfast and turned around like he was expecting someone. “Hello, Deceit.” Shit.

Deceit started to back up. He wasn't sure where he was going, but wherever it is, it'll be away from Logan.

“Don't bother running. The others will be coming out soon. I know you had an enlightening conversation with Virgil this morning. Was that enough to sedate your curiosity, or will you be staying a while?”

He was being sarcastic. Logan didn't want him here.

Deceit readjusted his stance, otherwise standing stock still. He was caught. Logan on one end, the rest of them on the other. He had no way to escape from whatever torturous things they wanted to do to him.

Deceit could feel his legs growing weak under him. He was already caught, he might as well make it easier for them. He slowly collapsed into a heap against the wall.

*

Logan's eyebrows shot up as Deceit sunk to the floor. As his form relaxed and his eyes closed, Logan inferred that he fainted. Whether it was in fright or fatigue, he couldn’t quite tell.

He carefully walked over Deceit, mindful of his lack of movement. It could be a fasade and he could jump up and disable him at any moment. When he was about halfway across the kitchen he saw movement out of the corner of his eye.

“L-Logan?” There stood Patton looking from the yellow and black heap on the floor to Logan and back.

Logan realized pretty quickly how bad the situation looked. “Patton, do not be alarmed. Deceit came into the room, I spoke few words to him, and he collapsed. I have my suspicions that he may have fainted from fright, as I did bring up the fact that he was in a compromised position.”

Patton took a few seconds to take in this new information. Then, before Logan could begin to protest, he ran over and fell to his knees by Deceit.

“Patton-!”

“No, he’s scared! We have to help him!” Patton cooed and whispered to the sleeping Deceit. “It's going to be okay, kiddo. I'm gonna help you.”

“Patton, he's unconscious; he can't hear you. Also, he could wake up at any moment and your position in relation to him really isn't ideal-”

Patton completely ignored Logan's protests in favor of inspecting Deceit. “He's got a fever. Get a cool cloth for his head, please.”

“Patton, listen to me. He fainted. It is estimated one to two minutes before any person should wake up after fainting unless the subject is in need of prompt medical assistance by trained professionals. What I'm saying is, Deceit is likely to become aware in two minutes tops and you are worryingly close to said Dark Side.”

“No! You listen to me! There is a side on the floor, unconscious and sick, and you expect me to just get up and see what happens? We can help him! He’s sick and so very skinny. Look.” Patton pushed Deceit's sleeve up carefully to reveal a very thin forearm. “I'm not about to just leave him because he might be scared! He needs food and medicine, probably. We can give him what he needs and you want me to stand back like he's some rabid animal.”

Logan knew two minutes was almost up. Either Deceit was dying (unlikely) or he was about to wake up with Patton very close to him. “Because he's a Dark Side! We can't afford to trust him with any of our well being. He's going to hurt you because he is scared. That's just how it goes in the Subconscious. Fear is scorned but violence is not. So please, to avoid preventable injury, move to where I'm located at the very least.”

Patton knew that what Logan said was right, it often was. But he didn't want to treat Deceit like an out of control animal. “We should at least give him a chance.”

“A chance? To hurt you?! No!” Logan had enough of this. He had tried to explain to Patton why this was an issue, but like always he refused to listen. Confident steps lead Logan closer to Patton, aiming to just pull him back and be done with it.

*

Deceit may have fainted. He thinks it had something to do with the fact that he hadn't slept in a week and tried to run for an extended period of time. Logan showing up gave him a high dose of adrenaline, but it didn’t last because he had no reserves left. He guessed he wasn't our for long because he only heard two of the sides talking. If the whole crew wasn't here, he had time.

Slowly he opened one eye, just enough to see Logan stalking towards him. Panicking, he jumped up and squared his stance. Logan jumped back in surprise.

Patton apparently was there too because he said something to Deceit, not that he heard any of it past the blood rushing in his ears. He was cornered. Logan was further away and he thought it was safe to wager that Patton was the weaker of the two so he grabbed bum roughly by the collar and pinned his hands behind his back.

“Don't come any closer or he'll get hurt.” Deceit forced through gritted teeth. As Logan stood still, wide eyed (but thinking a mile a minute about how to get Patton to safety, Deceit was sure), Deceit took stock of his position. He had one of the sides. They wouldn't risk one of their own so he was theoretically safe until Patton got away. Speaking of, that didn't seem to likely. Patton, for some odd reason, wasn't struggling at all. In fact, he was completely pliant. He was still babbling something to Deceit quietly, like he didn't want anyone else to hear.

“It’s okay. I know you're scared but we can help you. I can help you! If you let go of me, I'll get the others to back off, I promise. They don't want to hurt you. They just want me safe. You let go and you'll be safe.”

Tempting, but no. Deceit had never seen anyone use the “you're safe with me” tactic in the Dark Sides but it wasn't surprising that Patton used it. He had no brawns and select brains, so it was only logical that he'd have his own tempting tactics to keep himself safe.

Suddenly, two groups of footsteps were heard nearing the kitchen. Timing was really not on his side today.

None other than Virgil and Roman rounded the corner to the mess that was the current situation the sides found themselves in. Great. Just who he wanted to see. His ex-friend who had no qualms with using his past against him and the sword wielder.

As Roman gasped in horror and drew his sword to protect his compromised friend, Virgil stepped behind him. Coward.

Staring a samurai sword in the face made Deceit hyper aware of the fact that he had no weapon and no protection besides a human shield who could fight back at a moment's notice if he so desired. He was against a wall and surrounded, so he couldn't run. There was no getting out of this. He felt his eyes stinging. He was going to be thrown in a dungeon or locked away so he couldn't see Thomas anymore. The Subconscious was going to be watched so none of his family will ever be free. All because he was a dumbass and got curious.

“Back, you fiend! Release the innocent or be slayed at the hand of my beautiful blade.”

Yeah. More like let go of Patton AND get slayed. Roman wants Patton out of harm's way so he could get to me easier, Deceit thought. “Not a chance, Prince Shit.”

“Language.” Patton said quietly, as if he knew it wasn't the time, but did it anyway. It was almost funny, his caring about such a childish thing. It would have been hilarious if Deceit didn't feel like his life is on the line.

He’s failed before, spectacularly in fact. What did he do when he failed to convince Thomas to lie? Well, the Light Sides wouldn't do anything to him in front of Thomas, so he was relatively safe. Eventually though, he had to admit defeat and deck out.

In that moment, Deceit had a wonderful, amazing, superb, why-didn’t-I-think-of-that-sooner idea. He could sink out.

“English~” Deceit smirked and he sunk into Thomas’s world with Patton in his grasp.

*

Deceit did not have a plan. He should have come up with a plan, but he did not have one. While he knew he was safe in Thomas's living room, he couldn't stay there forever.

The Consciousness was a big no. The lights roamed their as they pleased. Deceit knew he couldn't go back there for a long time.

Deceit could sink into the Subconscious, but there was no guarantee he was safe there either. Most of the Light Sides couldn't go down there, but he was pretty sure Virgil still could. If Virgil followed Deceit down to the Subconscious, who knows what he would do. Take Deceit away for sure. Probably try to hurt the other Dark Sides, too. Some of the newer additions don't even know that what they represent are bad! Being scorned by the lights could break them.

Deceit decided to let go of Patton when they rose up.Technically, Patton didn't do anything bad. It wasn't his fault Deceit moronically walked into the kitchen with Logan in it. “Sorry.” He mumbled.

When he was let go, Patton spun around slowly and pulled Deceit into a bear hug. At first he was struck with a wave of fear- maybe Patton would try to hurt him, what if he didn't care that he was in Thomas's- but when he recognized Patton's actions as affection he melted into him against his will. Patton squeezed him comfortingly and rubbed his back.

Everything was too much. His glove coming off. Losing is only true friend and potentially having all of his secrets used against him (if Virgil chose to share them with the lights he was really screwed). Fainting from sleep deprivation right in front of Logan. Being threatened with his life, still being chased by people who hated him.

Deceit thought before that he could wait to cry in the comfort of his dim room of the Subconscious. He knew that after his glove came off he was teetering on the edge of a breakdown. He planned to run home, distribute the stolen food, and pity himself alone where no one could hear him.

But Patton hugging him bibassed all of his rational thought. The pansy side must have had some admit-your-feelings-bs that he released because Deceit stood no chance against his hug.

Patton persuaded Deceit's form over to Thomas's sofa where the two sunk down. Deceit's breathing quickened and tears started to stream rapidly down his face.

“Shh.” Patton cooed. “Your safe with me.”

Deceit knew this was a trap. It had to be. But he was too tired and too mentally broken to care. Slowly he slipped into a deep sleep.

*

Thomas just wanted some lemonade. He had been working on editing a script for hours and he wanted a little something to quench his thirst. Never in a million years would he had expected Deceit to be curled up on his couch in the safe grip of Patton.

“Patton? Care to explain why you have Mr. Lier Pants on my couch?”

“Hush!” Patton whispered. “He's sleeping. He was in the Consciousness and fainted for some reason and then he woke up and get scared because the others were surrounding him so he used me like a shield and rose up into your world with me. I don't know what he was gonna do but it probably wasn't going to be the most peaceful so I hugged him so he'd calm down. Turns out he had a lot of feelings so he just kinda broke down and fell asleep. I forget I can have that effect on people.” Patton panted, having relayed all of that information in one breath, and continued. “I'm keeping the sides in the Consciousness for now so that Deceit can rest for a little without being attacked. I think everyone needs a little cool down time.”

Despite himself, Thomas smiled. “Sound like you've got my head all under control then.”

“Always, Kiddo. Always.”

Patton fell asleep a little later next to Deceit. When he woke up he saw a little note on the coffee table that said “thank you” with a cartoon drawing of a snake in the lower right corner. There was no other sign of Deceit.

In fact, the Light Sides wouldn't see him face to face for a very long time.

~

Well, people likes the last part so here you go. Also don't love this but I'm tired okay.

Tag list: General-> @kameraishere @punsterterry

Deceit second part-> @lostonehero @forsakethegodsbeforetheydoyou @idk-i-draw

[in-the-grip-of-depression]

In The Grip Of Depression Chapter 16: Not One Of Us

Chapter 1|Previous Chapter|Next Chapter Trigger Warnings: Mentions of blood, violence, manipulation

Virgil spared a single glance for the others before he slowly approached where Preston was laying on the floor, groaning in pain from where he'd hit the barrier.

"stabbing someone while their eyes are shut? That's a bit of a cheap tactic." Virgil said with the knife in his hand.

Preston was glaring at Virgil as he rubbed the spot where his back had collided with the barrier "I'd call it self defence. Who could blame me for killing something like you?" Preston growled out.

Virgils hand clenched around the knife as he fought the urge to stab Preston. In the end he threw the knife away towards the treeline and replied "You're not going to provoke me into attacking you again, I refuse to stoop to your level."

Prestons eyes flitted towards where the knife had been thrown for a second but as he pushed himself to his feet with a wince they locked onto Virgil.

"you say that but we both know you can't help but want to hurt me, want to kill me. I see the hunger in your eyes, you want to rip me apart limb from limb but you hold back." Preston said with a smirk.

"I'm not going to because I'm not you." Virgil muttered.

Preston chuckled "no, the reason you're not going to is because you're a coward. You're so scared of how everyone will see you or will think of you that you can't make the decision to fully eliminate a threat. What a shameful existence it must be to know you can't even do your job properly."

Virgil was shaking with anger now but he was also feeling lightheaded from the still bleeding knife wound on his back.

"you're talking about how I can't do my job properly but seem to ignore the fact that you've failed at yours." Virgil grit out.

Preston grinned nastily. "Ah but you see, I haven't failed because although this process is slowly destroying me, it's also slowly destroying you and eventually Thomas will start to feel the full affects of having no anxiety again. It's almost as if nothings changed. Both of your bargains have ended the same way in the end, Thomas will be missing his anxiety and will kill the others and himself with his reckless actions."

Virgil let out an angry snarl but somehow managed to keep himself from attacking Preston.

"Why are you so intent on harming Thomas?" a voice suddenly asked from the other side of the barrier.

Virgil jumped slightly having forgotten about the others watching.

Preston smirked at Logan who had been the one to ask the question. "Well Logan baby, if Thomas dies then I get to become more powerful. It's kind of an ideal set up, I get to torture and kill you lot and then right at the end I get rewarded by gaining a huge amount of power." he winked at Logan who shuddered.

Virgil bit back a small groan as he started to feel the full affect of the knife wound on his back. He'd been running on adrenaline and anger but now both had dispersed leaving him feeling like he was going to collapse.

"Surely that can't be right. As a part of Thomas you would die as well." Roman said with a frown.

Preston rolled his eyes at Romans comment but didn't correct him as he had noticed Virgil starting to wilt slightly. It seemed he'd had more of an effect on Virgil with the knife than he thought.

"Wait, Roman repeat what you just said." Logan said, his eyes locked onto Preston.

Roman was confused as he repeated himself but Logan pointed an accusing finger at Preston.

"You're not a part of Thomas, you're a parasite! You disguise yourself as if you're just another part of him but really you're not." Logan shouted.

"I should have known from all the inconsistencies! Your hair is much darker than any of ours and so are your eyes and even your voice has an off tone in it. I never noticed because..." Logan started of shouting but his voice trailed off and tears welled up in his eyes.

Patton engulfed Logan in a hug while he shot a glare at Preston. Knowing why Preston had been using Logan didn't make Patton any less pissed off. In fact it actually made him more pissed off.

Roman opened his mouth to say something but was cut off as Virgils legs gave out and he fell to the floor with a thud.

"Virgil!" shouted Patton and Roman at the same time.

Preston laughed and took a few steps towards the exhausted looking Virgil.

"You know, I'd always wondered why you were spoken about like you were the biggest threat to me and although I understand now what was meant by that, seeing you like this makes the warning seem unnecessary."

Virgil glared up at Preston but didn't reply, not trusting himself to be able to speak without showing how much pain he was in.

"Since when did any of us speak about Virgil like he would be a threat to you?" Roman asked, confused and annoyed.

Preston cackled "Oh that. Well I made a lovely little friend who pointed out several things to help me get to people the first time and when I returned he warned me about little Virgil here but he managed to find a way to bring him to an almost breaking point so it was easier for me to break him. Unfortunately that didn't work out how I hoped but now everything is going well despite the fact I'm in this fucking thing."

Virgil pushed away the pain and exhaustion he was feeling and instead focused on his anxious energy, trying to show that even though he was injured he was still fighting.

Logan had gone pale thinking of how Preston had used him and a few tears ran down his face but he quickly wiped them away, his expression turning furious.

"Your saying someone helped you in your mission to try and kill Thomas?" Patton asked in a shaky voice.

Preston grinned again "yep. They may have been under the impression that I was just working to destroy you lot and they'd end up with more power but they still helped me."

Virgil had managed to draw in all of the energy he could and was taking a deep breath to brace himself.

"oh so you use everyone? It's not just me? That makes me feel a little bit better." Logan said bitterly.

Preston laughed "You were definitely the must fun to use Logan but I wouldn't have been able to be as efficient without my dear friend giving me information and tips."

Virgil stared directly at Preston and called out "Hey depression. Here's a bit of information. Don't underestimate me!" with that said Virgil unleashed his energy so it blasted into Preston as a solid black wall and sent him careening into a tree which he slid down and lay motionless on the floor.

Virgil let out a small laugh and then fell on his side panting for breath.

The others were shocked for a few seconds but immediately turned to Virgil trying to see if he was ok.

"I'm fine, just a bit tired." Virgil said out of habit and when he got three disbelieving glares added "OK maybe I'm suffering slightly from blood loss but I'll be alright."

Patton sat down on the floor in front of the barrier and rested his forehead on it. "blood loss isn't something you can sleep off Virgil, especially considering you're still bleeding." he murmured sadly.

Roman took a seat next to Patton with a grim expression as he noticed the blood still dripping from Virgils back.

Logan remained standing, his eyes shut as he tried to think of a solution. "That's it." he mumbled to himself and his eyes shot open. "Maybe I can push my healing ability through the barrier and heal you."

Virgil snorted "I doubt that will work, this barrier is designed to..."

Logan cut Virgil off "yes, yes, I know,it's designed to keep you guys from getting out but it probably won't try and stop people getting in."

Virgil sighed and shook his head. "It's not going to work. I doubt even if I get right up close to the barrier that you'll manage to do anything."

Logan frowned "You don't know that until we've tried. Lean against the barrier and let me at least try."

Virgil huffed but crawled towards the barrier and leant with his back against it.

Logan crouched down, placed his hands on the barrier and scrunched up his face as he tried to focus his healing ability enough to send it through to Virgils back.

Virgil shut his eyes as he leant against the barrier and tried to think of a way to bring up the issue that had distracted him enough that he got the injury.

A strange tingling started radiating through Virgils back and his eyes shot open in surprise. "I... I think it's actually working." He said in a shocked voice.

Logan didn't respond because he was too busy forcing his ability through the barrier.

As Roman and Patton shared a relieved expression they failed to notice the shadowy figure lurking just out of sight, watching everything intently.

Whoever it was had been watching Virgil and Prestons interaction closely and didn't seem to appreciate what they'd overheard.

Before anyone noticed them the figure slipped away in silence, eyes flashing dangerously as scheme's began forming in their mind.

[gaylotusthatexists]

The Same Four Notes

Chapter Fifteen - Logan

Logan looked around the café frantically. Roman and Virgil was nowhere to be found. They were supposed to be on in fifteen minutes.

He turned around, and went to join Patton sitting next to the window. "Hey, Pat," Logan said, sitting down on the seat opposite to him.

Patton grinned. "Hello... gan."

Logan sighed. "That were terrible, Patton."

"I know."

"Anyway," Logan said, trying to get straight to the point, "where are the other two?"

"Roman went to get Virgil," Patton explained. "They're not back yet."

At that exact moment, the door burst upon, Roman walking straight in, followed by a slightly embarrassed looking Virgil.

"Oh, apparently they are back," Patton corrected himself.

The two made their way over to Logan and Patton, and took a seat at the table with them.

"Where have you two been?" Logan asked. "You should have been here hours ago."

"In my defence," Roman began, "it wasn't my fault that Virgil didn't show up."

"You guys could have done it without me, y'know," Virgil said, quietly.

Patton shook his head. "No! You are an important member of our team, kiddo, we can't do this all without you!"

Virgil sank into his seat. "Sure. Whatever. Well, I'm here now, so."

"What took you two so long?" Logan questioned, trying to get the conversation back on track.

Virgil gestured to his face. Logan looked over, frowning a little. It did look... different, kind of. His eyes seemed brighter. Logan knew that would be ridiculous, a persons eye colour doesn't just 'get brighter', so that had to be some sort of logical explanation...

His makeup. Logan couldn't believe he hadn't noticed before. Now that he saw, it seemed so obvious. His usual black eyeshadow had changed so that it included sparks of red and orange. Logan did admit that it looked good, as well. However, he couldn't help but feel as if it was a waste of time.

"What, so you spent extra time doing whatever that is, making both yourself and Roman late-"

"Actually, Roman did the makeup stuff," Virgil interrupted.

Logan shot a glare at Roman. "You were supposed to just go and get him, not sit down and do his makeup for him."

"That was the only way to get him to come out!" Roman defended, holding up his hands. "Look, it's harder than you think."

"Hard to retrieve a person from their house and walk fifteen minutes down the street?"

"I had to deal with Virgil, there were many things that had to be sorted out before we could come!"

"Virgil is perfectly capable of doing his own makeup and walking down here."

"Logan, you don't know what was going on with him, you can't just-"

"I'm right here, you know," Virgil spoke up. "Don't talk about me like I'm not sitting right next to you. And, uh, Logan? Roman is right." He took a deep breath. "It's my fault, really-"

"No, it's not!" Roman exclaimed, placing a hand on Virgil's arm.

Virgil pulled his arm away, rolling his eyes a little. "Fine. But, yeah, it was me who insisted on doing the makeup before we left. I'm sor-"

"Don't you dare apologize!"

"Don't tell me what to do!"

"Guys!" A silence fell between the them, as the three looked over to the source of the voice. Patton. Of course. Logan had almost forgotten that he was still there. "Stop fighting, please." He looked almost... no. Logan couldn't be seeing that right. "We're on after this song."

Logan's eyes widened. He looked over at the stage, then down at his clipboard. "Patton is correct," he muttered. He then added, louder, "You guys need to get to the back of the stage. I wish you luck."

The three nodded, and Logan was left alone. He had yet to decide whether putting their act last had been a good idea. On the one hand, it was pretty lucky, as if they weren't in that position on the timetable they probably wouldn't have made it, since Roman and Virgil had been late. Although, it did mean they would have to be good. In order to keep the audience engaged, they would have to be amazing right off the bat. Everyone would be tired at this point. They would have stopped paying attention. The boys had to do something to gain that attention back.

The other act came to a close, and a small round of applause rung through the room. The next thing Logan knew, Roman was standing by the microphone, and Virgil and Patton were taking their seats on the stage. A count to four, and they started playing.

Logan immediately became entranced in the music. Roman had a way with his voice. He could somehow just pull a person in, make them forget about everything else, like it was some sort of magic. At this point, Logan wouldn't be surprised if it was. If not for the fact that magic wasn't real, of course. Logan didn't believe in that stuff... did he? Even so, if magic was real, then this would be it. Roman, standing on stage, lost in the lyrics, the lyrics that Logan had written, and just... looking like he felt completely free. Like he could fly. Like he was powerful, like he was in control. It was mesmerising.

The blue-haired boy tried his best to tear his eyes of Roman, instead looking over to Virgil. And, just like that, Logan was lost again. He hadn't noticed it before, but Virgil looked completely different when performing. It was as if he was in his own world, unaware of everything - which, Logan thought, drastically contrasted his usual manner, as Virgil usually seemed to be over-aware, with his eyes darting around everywhere, taking in every detail and watching every tiny action around him. It was almost comforting to see that a person who seemed so on-edge all the time find a place where he could lose himself in what he loved. Where he could relax, with nothing in the back of his mind to worry about. It made Logan think that, maybe, the same could happen for him.

No, that was stupid. Logan shouldn't have been thinking like that. He was perfectly fine with how things were going for him.

Sighing, Logan looked over to Patton. They must have just finished their first song, because Patton was grinning and looking around the room, without strumming on his ukulele. His cheeks had a slightly red hue, and his glasses had fallen down his nose. Logan smiled as he watched Patton push them back up. The next song started, and Logan's smile grew even more as Patton began to strum happily. He looked so carefree, so content with where he was. The stares from the audience didn't throw him off in the slightest - in fact, every tiny moment of eye contact just seemed to draw him further into the music. Logan admired that.

For the next twenty minutes or so, Logan didn't take his eyes off the boys. He didn't even listen to the music that much - just watching them perform, watching them exist in perfect harmony, was enough.

A round of applause echoed through the room. A few people stood. It had... it had gone well? People liked it? That was good. Logan was counting on that.

Although, it seemed as if Logan was the one clapping the loudest.

"Well, I should probably head home," Roman announced. It had been just over an hour since their performance, and most of the audience and the other acts had left. Only a few students from the local university, a few older couples, and the four boys remained.

Patton wrapped his arms around Roman, enclosing him in a hug. "Have a safe journey home," he said.

Logan nodded. "Yes, Roman, do have a safe journey. Do you require anyone to see you home?"

"No," Roman replied, shaking his head. "It's best if I go alone. You have to stay here, Logan, and Pat and I can't be seen in public together. Virgil..."

"I'm gonna hang here for a bit," Virgil said. "Like, a few hours, at least. I... I don't really want to go home just yet."

Roman nodded. "Ok." He smiled. "Well, I'll see you three around." He began to leave.

"Wait, Ro!" Patton shouted. "At least let me walk you to the end of the street. I'm gonna go home now, anyway."

Roman hesitated, but soon shrugged. "I don't see what could go wrong with that," Roman said, smiling. He took Patton's hand, and the two left the café.

That left Virgil sitting on the counter, with Logan standing just behind him. Logan looked up at Virgil, smirking a little.

"Do you really have to sit on the counter?" he inquired.

Virgil's head shot around to face Logan, his body turning a little with him. "The counters far more comfortable than the floor."

"There are chairs, you know," Logan pointed out.

"Yeah, but that just doesn't feel the same."

"Well, yes, I imagine they would be far more comfortable-"

"Nah, counters cool."

Logan sighed. "If I cannot get you to change your mind, then fair enough."

Virgil smiled. "Thank you. I'm gonna stay on the counter."

"Of course you are." Logan looked around the café. "You did well today, by the way."

Virgil immediately blushed. Was it really that easy to make him blush? "Th-thanks."

There was silence between them for a moment. Had it always been this awkward? No. Usually they could talk. Or, well... usually they would be completely alone, or with the other two. Now though, in the café in broad daylight, with actual costumers sitting around... maybe it wasn't so easy for Virgil to speak. Logan could understand that.

That didn't mean he could stand the silence, though. He also couldn't deny that watching them perform had made him... think. Think about things that he usually wouldn't.

He had to tell someone about what had happened with Patton. He needed advice on the situation. Maybe Virgil could help.

"Hey, can I talk to you about something?" Logan asked.

Fear flashed through Virgil's eyes.

Placing a hand on top of Virgil's, Logan gave him a soft smile. "Don't worry, nothing bad. Just... something I need to get off my chest."

Virgil hesitated, but nodded. "Yeah, sure, go ahead dude."

"Patton kissed me," Logan blurted out, without a second thought.

There was another silence. Logan worried that he had maybe gone to far - he shouldn't have said that to Virgil, should he? This wasn't going to go well.

"Okay," Virgil finally said, letting out a breath of air. Logan came to the realisation that Virgil had been holding his breath. God, he was such an idiot. He should have seen that coming. "Does Roman know?"

Logan frowned. "You're taking this extremely well."

"Does. Roman. Know?" Virgil repeated.

"I... don't know."

Virgil hummed in thought. "If it's any consolation, I'm fairly sure that Roman would be fine with it. Or, well, they told me that they both were... willing to let you into their relationship, or something like that. I don't know. Just..." He tapped his hand on his knee. "Did you kiss back?"

Logan shook his head. "No. I didn't think it would be right for me to do so."

"Well, that's... good." He took a deep breath. "You like Patton, though, don't you?"

"No," Logan lied. He cringed at how easily that had come out. He was supposed to be opening up to Virgil at that moment. He had to tell him the truth. "Well, I mean, I certainly used to. When we were younger. Whether I still feel the same now, that's..."

"You do, Logan, you aren't fooling anyone."

Logan sighed. "Yes, you are right. I do like him."

"He likes you, too," Virgil mentioned, sounding almost too casual.

Logan shook his head in disbelief. "No. He's... he's happy with Roman."

Virgil smiled sadly. "You need to talk to him. And Roman. I have a feeling they both have something to say to you."

"No, I can't, Virgil!" Logan exclaimed, causing a few people to look over. He muttered an apology, and lowered his voice for his next words. "I can't risk doing that. It could wreck their relationship. I don't want to be responsible for that."

"Isn't it worse to keep it a secret?" Virgil wondered.

Logan shrugged. "I suppose so. But it's really up to Patton to decide whether or not Roman should know. And it's Patton job to tell him. It was Patton who kissed me."

Virgil sighed. "Ok then."

They didn't speak again until it was time for Virgil to go home. By that point, everyone else had left. Logan sat in the café, completely alone with his thoughts. He wasn't sure if that was a good thing.

[axiomsofice]

21/22 Power Rankings: Atlantic

TAMPA BAY

What more can be said of the back to back champs? Without many questions at any position, the Lightning are an easy choice to put first here. Although, like last season, we might see them finish somewhere after first in their division as they prioritize health into the playoffs, as the look to increase their strong chances at defending their title successfully. Sure, Johnson and Gourde are elsewhere, but Tampa has great depth with many underutilized forwards vying for playing time, not to mention Kucherov returning to regular season play. Up front, Mathieu Joseph, Ross Colton, and Alex Barre-Boulet will be looking to run with the openings before them, and in truth all 3 have already proven effective in their time filling in last season. Meanwhile a pair of veteran depth pieces come into fold as well. Pierre-Edouard Bellemare is the archetypal 4th line centre, and has been the gold standard for years across many teams, IMO truly a joy. Corey Perry will join him and Patrick Maroon on what looks to be a line that will be a handful the longer the season goes.

On the back end not much needs to be said, as the likes of Hedman, McDonagh,Sergachev, Cernak, and Rutta have proven to be a force. Enter Zach Bogosian, who represents an upgrade in the spot once filled by Luke Schenn or Brayden Coburn, and potentially an appearance by Cal Foote. Of course, Vasilevskiy is the top goalie in the world, so there’s not much else one could desire in the crease.

BOSTON

Another longstanding contender who may coast thru the regular season a little, we shouldn’t expect anything less than the usual strong results for the Bruins. Some change in recent years, notably Krejci, Halak, and Miller’s departures, seem to give a different look to the roster, but the show will roll on. Taylor Hall signing at a nice AAV ensures some scoring will be present beyond The Perfection Line, but alongside Debrusk, Smith, Coyle, Haula, and Nick Foligno fills out the Bruins’ middle 6 forwards with a lot of size, speed, and skill. I know Trent Frederic will be a great Bruin because I “hate” (in a good way) him already. The sun is getting lower for Jack Studnicka’s time as a prospect, but some fans are expecting/hoping he’s ready to make a splash this season.

Charlie McAvoy gets comically little recognition as one of the league’s premier defencemen, and fits the Bruins’ historical stereotype perfectly. The good news for him is that the better part of the next decade should see him playing at a Norris Trophy level, so there’s no way that lack of appreciation can continue, right? Forbort will bring a lot of what left with Kevan Miller. Do not underestimate Connor Clifton, and especially Matt Grzelcyk, as the former BU Captain has been a crucial piece for B’s the past 4 seasons. Mike Reilly really came into his own over the past 2 seasons, and his offensive abilities are a welcome fit with the rest of the group. Perhaps we see Urho Vaakanainen force his way into a regular spot this year, but with another year before waiver eligibility it might be another season in the AHL.

Rask might return at some point, but Linus Ullmark will be looking to take off now free from Buffalo. He’s shown good results considering the team in front of him, but Boston’s strong defensive play has made it easier for all of their goalies to perform well, including the young backup Jeremy Swayman.

TORONTO

The Leafs have a lot to prove, and I’m not referencing the playoffs. Their status as a true cup contender has been us getting way ahead of ourselves, although they have the talent to get there at some point. In truth, last season was the first time the Buds paced their division, clinched a playoff spot early, or even posted top 10 goals against numbers. Obviously, last season was short and strange, so proving these things in a full season *is* the next step facing this group. They have a lot more to prove in the regular season than Tampa or Boston, so this group should be focused and ruthless in their pursuit of putting together a dominant and consistent regular season.

Admittedly as a Leafs fan, I have too many thoughts to post here regarding the specifics of the team here, so I’ll stick to some big picture analysis. If this group loses to Boston or Tampa in the first round it the year a waste or a failure? Should the coach, GM, core 4, president, be moved on from automatically? Simply put, no. I understand and appreciate the passion these thoughts come from but it’s important to maintain perspective. This team is good, the players are good, the lineup on paper is good, the prospect pool is good, the depth is intriguing, but not yet great. They have performed like a good team over the past 5 seasons, which isn’t nothing, but not like a great one. I’d argue they’ve done a good job living up to that and that we’ve misdiagnosed them as a team that is already great. Yes I’d love to win a cup or even a round here, but the standard of success and belief this organization has built for itself in the Matthews era should not be unappreciated.

FLORIDA

Like Toronto, the Panthers will be hungry to prove that winning their division last year was no fluke. Personally, I would have voted GM Zito for the Jim Gregory Trophy last season, as he managed to infuse the Panthers’ skilled lineup with some of the toughness Columbus iced during his time there. Even more important is adding such pieces that are in phase with the team’s existing age. Duclair, Bennett, and Verhaeghe are primed to show their performances last season are repeatable, while Sam Reinhardt will look to flourish in a new role on a respectable team. Tippett and Lundell give the Panthers’ lineup a tantalizing potential and could easily form into the league’s best 3rd line, and help the offence as as whole rise to the top group in the league. Perhaps we see Denisenko join them in the Panthers’ ranks at some point this season.

The defence group is really fun, especially if Aaron Ekblad can get back to full health paired alongside Mackenzie Weegar, and resume their elite play. Brandon Montour went from blue-chip to scrap heap in Buffalo, but I like his skillset a lot, especially since it compliments the ruggedness of Forsling, Gudas, and Nutivaara quite well.

The goaltending situation is talented and volatile, perhaps more so than any other team in the NHL. Sure, Bobrovsky is overpaid (contracts have disappeared before) and has struggled during his time in Florida, but stranger things have happened than the idea of him rediscovering his game. Meanwhile backup Spencer Knight has quickly risen to the NHL and has performed exceptionally at every level along the way, and on a rookie deal is underpaid, meaning for the next 3 years Bob’s contract is much more manageable. That being said, a goalie’s path especially is rarely a straight line (see Carter Hart), so it’s not unexpected or too concerning if Knight goes through a rough patch at some point. Of course, it will be on the team in front of them to help put them in a good position for success.

MONTREAL

Wow, what to make of this group. A roller coaster set of years where the Habs dredged through a regular season before a playoff glow-up, thrown in with some key injuries to Price and Weber, a rotation at centre (losing Danault and Kotkaniemi while adding Dvorak), and a full season of the dynamic Cole Caulfield, it’s hard what to make of this group. The strength of the team is along the wings, as Caulfield, Gallagher, Toffoli, Hoffman, Anderson, Drouin, Armia, Byron, and Lekhonen is a strong and deep group with a good blend of skills. Suzuki and Dvorak is a good start down the middle, and both their lines should perform well thanks to their multi-faceted games and strong linemates. Evans is valued by the organization and his responsible play fits what Montreal clearly looks for from their centres, meaning Mathieu Perrault will be well insulted as an offensively oriented bottom 6 centre.

Petry will continue to be the Habs best defenceman, while Edmundson, Chiarot, and Savard will see to it that the Habs have a defensively minded beast of an athlete on each pair. Romanov is ready for a bigger role, and is equal parts feisty and skilled. There are some wildcards as Chris Wideman returns to the NHL, after the 31 year old spent a few seasons out of the league. His offensive skillset might be a great fit. I like Kulak as a 3rd pair option, but there is a chance either Mattias Norlinder or Josh Brook factor into the mix at some point. Seeing how long it took for Romanov to (hopefully) work his way into the lineup, it seems more likely Montreal will take their time on that idea.

Price made me feel good in the playoff run, vindicating my years of support for him despite inconsistent years. He should be ready for the start of the season, and will settle into a strong groove. Allen will need to continue to play a significant amount of games. The Habs are a much stronger playoff team than regular season team, mostly due to how they defend. This is to say, these goalies will continue to have a much harder time in the regular season than they will in the post season. The hope is now that their increased firepower up front helps them clinch a playoff berth in a very competitive Eastern Conference.

OTTAWA

GM Dorion did the right thing in saying the time to compete is now in Ottawa. Although many have questioned some of their recent draft choices, the Senators clearly have a vision of what they want to be. The statement is a commitment not to tank (you might end up with a high pick anyway), to play Logan Brown, Shane Pinto, and Alex Formenton in the NHL instead of prioritizing further seasoning in the minors, to start committing to the group that you want to win with (sign Tkachuk!). Stutzle is the Ferrari, the pure offensive talent, contrasted against a group that is rugged and tenacious. That’s not to say Batherson, Norris, Pinto, White, and Logan Brown don’t have offensive tools, but with Nick Paul, Connor Brown, Austin Watson, and of course Brady Tkachuk in the fold, the forward group seems like they would take pleasure in being a thorn in opponents’ sides down to the last second of the game, no matter the score. We might even see an appearance from Yegor Sokolov, who uh, fits their personality.

Chabot leads the back end, although Artyom Zub was really good in his rookie season. We’ll be hoping to see more from Erik Brannstrom, although it seems like he may not fit what Ottawa is looking for from the blueline. Mete is a good pickup, especially considering the trading of Mike Reilly, which I did not exactly understand (see win now comments). I like Zaitsev, although at this point no one is suggesting he’s a strong top 4 option. Holden and Del Zotto are expensive depth options, perhaps Ottawa can bring out what they see in these players. Lassi Thomson and Jacob Bernard-Docker are good prospects, but should see more time in the minors. The best version of this defence is probably not achieved until Jake Sanderson is a strong contributor, which is a year or two away still.

Murray is interesting, maybe he can find a strong season, but it’s hard to say he’ll be getting a raise next contract. Anton Forsberg has shown signs of a decent backup amidst his bouncing around the league, but I’m a fan of young Filip Gustavsson out of the 3. He was great across 9 NHL games last season, and ideallly would start pushing Murray for the crease starting this season.

DETROIT

The Wings are poised to start peeking out of their long rebuild, as we should start to see the bones of their true team coming to the forefront. It wouldn’t be the worst to end up with a high pick (again, lottery), but I don’t think it’s end their best interest to be intentionally making their team worse at this point. Larkin, Vrana, and to an extent Bertuzzi are legitimate top 6 forwards, and there’s at least some hope (varying degrees) that Zadina, Suter, and Rasmussen can join them. The lineup up front is filled out respectably by Fabbri and Namestnikov while Gagner, Stephens, and Erne will look to cement similar roles. The real fun is in the prospects, particularly Berggren, Raymond, and Veleno have a chance to push for a spot. The most likely to make the team outright this season is Berggren, who was spectacular in the SHL last season. Some older prospects who could finally earn an NHL job are Hirose and Smith, both of whom deserve a shot at such an opportunity.

The much anticipated debut of Moritz Seider is upon us, and the Red Wings have acquired a good partner for him in veteran Nick Leddy. Although he’s not what he was at his peak, his style of play and experience make him an ideal partner to start the defenders career. Dekeyser and Hronek are a decent pair, albeit overmatched for the assignments they will no doubt receive atop the depth chart. Ideally this will help Hronek continue to improve his game. Staal brings a good veteran presence, while Stecher and Oesterle are pretty good depth options. Young Gustav Lindstrom saw 13 games of action last season, and could be a real bright spot if he’s able to play his way into a regular spot. The strengthen the organization is the glut of talented defence prospects en route, Edvinsson, Tuomisto, Johnsson, McIssac (get well!), Wallinder, Buium, Sebrango, Viro, it’s almost hard to keep track, and harder still to envision a future where Detroit’s blueline isn’t very strong. I could be wrong, but it seems intentional (and smart) to start a rebuild with a strong group of D prospects, as forwards develop faster, fall more often in the draft, and are easier to acquire than impactful defenders. It’s be great to end up with Shane Wright, but it’s more likely to add a really skilled forward between 10-20 in the first round than a bonafide defender.

Nedeljkovic isn’t the first Calder worthy goalie to get traded although a 3rd round pick is not as steep as say Tuukka Rask… He won’t have it as easy behind a much worse team this season, but has been playing well long enough that I like his chances of growing into the starter role. Griess is an accomplished tandem-backup, and will be counted on to help Nedeljkovic ease into the top role. Cossa over Wallstedt was bold, but Detroit fans should feel really good about Yzerman getting the player he liked more. The Wings have a bunch of goalies in the system born between 1997-2002, so it will be interesting to see how they all shake out in the coming years as they approach starters age.

BUFFALO

I almost feel bad about putting the Sabres last, and would encourage Leafs and Oilers fans to think about that. I do really like Coach Granato, and think that the team will show signs of a stronger direction this season. This mess with Eichel pushes this rebuild at least another year away, and reminds me of the end of Matt Duchene’s time in Colorado. It’s be hard to end up with a better haul than Girard, Byram, plus plus, but at this point it’s nothing but a negative cloud hanging above all involved. Remember, it wasn’t until Duchene was moved that MacKinnon really took off. Lofty comparison, but a new coach and atmosphere seemed to really help Dahlin, Cozens, Mittlestadt, and Jokiharju rejuvenate their careers. I like Hinostroza as a player, and with Bjork and Caggulia could help fill out the lineup with legitimate NHLers, especially considering Asplund, Ruotsalainen, and Tage Thompson are looking to carve out a role in the NHL. Quinn, Peterka, and Rosen are nice prospects but still at least a year away, so adding to this group in an Eichel deal is really important.

Pulling Dahlin out of his downward spiral is the most important step in this season. There’s really no reason, besides mismanagement, that he shouldn’t be among the league’s best young defenders at this point. Jokiharju is also still quite young, although his upside isn’t what Dahlin’s is, and it would be really encouraging to see positive growth. Colin Miller is one of the only other returning pieces on the backend, but could be serviceable with fellow NHL regulars Will Butcher and Mark Pysyk. Jacob Bryson played well in 38 games in his rookie season and figures to be in the mix once again. Further down the line, Mattias Samuelsson made an appearance in 12 NHL games last season, and will be pushing for a spot. Of course Owen Power is waiting in the wings, and another season with a strong Michigan team and a World Junior appearance, along with perhaps another World Cup appearance would go a long way towards setting the stage for an impactful rookie campaign in 22/23. Although it doesn’t look great now the Sabres’ blueline has interesting pieces in place for the coming years.

Perhaps the most underwhelming aspect of this roster is in net, where Anderson, Dell, and Tokarski are overmatched in their current slotting, as made evidence by all 3 making what is essentially league minimum. Although Luukkonen, Portillo, and Levi are interesting goalie prospects all 3 are years away at this point. It’s hard to imagine this team going anywhere given the current situation in net. No doubt making a significant upgrade here will be crucial whenever this team decides to win.

[anxious-vigil]

Misunderstandings (pt 1/5)

Summary: Virgil needs someone to help him through panic attacks, and Logan seems to be the perfect solution. However when he approaches the other side, assumptions are made and soon he's left alone and confused, trying to track down Logic just to ask him where things went wrong. Romantic identity angst fic with like a paragraph of crack at the very end. I've since realised it's also heavily inspired by Platonic by @randomslasher so you should go read that as well if you haven't already. On Ao3 here - http://archiveofourown.org/works/13503786/chapters/30969534

Trigger warnings: Graphic descriptions of panic attacks, mentions of self harm, discussions of sexual/romantic identity, some aro-phobic language, lots of arguing and self-deprecation

Pairings: Analogical, background Royality  

Chapter 1

Virgil sank to his knees, breathing heavily. Thomas was about to upload a new short, they were all so proud of the work put into it. He hated that he managed to ruin what should be a moment of satisfaction EVERY SINGLE GODDAMN TIME. Sometimes he really hated how he was, he tried so hard to change, be better, for Thomas, but all the roads seemed to lead back here, him shaking on the floor of his room, struggling to suck in air, scratching at his arms for a distraction. Anything to stop his fear leeching across the connection to Thomas. For a second he considered snapping the connection, just until the video was up, but hey, we all saw how well that went last time, right? Oh yeah, absolutely terribly.

Virgil shut his eyes and gasped at the pang of pure terror. Tears streamed down his face as he shook, grasping for something to ground him. Patton floated into his mind, the smell of cookies, a warm hug, overenthusiastic chatter, the noise, it's overwhelming, the arms are constricting, the smell's too sweet, saccharine, he can't mean it, he's like this to everyone, he's just humouring you, when did his hands start to strangle me? No, not Patton it's NOT HELPING, breathe, just breathe, think of something else, but what?

He snapped his eyes open and stared straight into the gaze of Sally. His posters. Roman. He's been nice...ish lately... though he's rarely seen apart from Patton and anytime him and Roman are alone together it tends to end in a fight. Yelling, a shove, a raised hand, a sword, no, shit, NO, Roman wouldn't, he's not like- the blades coming for you, DUCK!

Virgil's breath stopped, his face wet. A thread of panic had shimmied it's way past his defences and down to Thomas. Roman would be furious, no, stop, don't, think of Thomas, you're not the villain anymore, you need to be better for Thomas, do it for him. A ping of insecurity echoed back from Thomas. Fuck. Think. Keep calm. Breathe. Think rationally. Rationally... Logically...? What did Logan say....? Cognitive distortions? That didn't mean anything to Virgil. He wailed quietly, berating himself for his stupidity, what would Logan say if he could see him now?  Idiot. Logan would say you're an idiot, wait, no, too emotional, he'd say that you're acting irrationally, that fans have always liked previous shorts and there's no reason this should be any different. He... he would reassure you and give you that small patient smile and maybe... just maybe, if you were really lucky, he'd open his arms and he'd tell you it was logical to ensure Thomas' well-being through making you feel heard and acknowledged but you'd see the care in his eyes and know it's no chore to him and he might... you might...

A wave of relief and anticipation followed the posting of the short and Virgil's eyes cracked open slowly. He reached back gently and slowly placed his hands over where he swore he could still feel the warmth of Logan's arms. His breathing was steady and the tear tracks were dried on his face. He stumbled over to his desk and found the My NEGATIVE Thinking video, pressing play with shaking fingers. Listening to the soothing voices, following the small but significant leaps of logic, by the end he was almost feeling... calm? He'd stopped shaking anyway. He couldn't remember feeling like this in... a while. It was nice, he thought. Virgil pressed play again, this time focusing on his own expressions, how he fought, wincing at each reminder of how he acted as Anxiety, no wonder Roman used to hate him, but by the end card his pixelated face was smiling softly, even though the cause may have been Logan's slang, not his calming influence. In his past self's defence though, that shit was hilarious.

He'd since purposefully taught Logan some slightly... twisted definitions. Not enough that it was an outright lie, Logan wouldn't forgive him for corrupting facts like that, just perhaps leaving out some of the, uh, subtleties of a word's usage. Roman's reactions were amazing and the best part was that he couldn't even correct Virgil's definitions as they were technically correct.

He pondered his tentative acquaintanceship with Logan. He liked the logical side and his calming presence was often the only thing that got him through group events. He loved hanging out with Pat, especially when he invited Virgil to help bake (Patton wasn't allowed in the kitchen alone after the devastating Incident of 2009) , but sometimes he could get exuberant and overwhelming and wherever Patton was, Roman wasn't far behind, the literal definition of exuberant and overwhelming. (Yes, he's told Logan the fanders were using that definition, and yes the other side has used “that was a bit too Roman” in conversation, and yes, it was AMAZING. Roman sputtered a bit but he wasn't too mad, which was good cos Virgil had been a little worried, ok a lot worried, but not enough to not do it.)

If just a recorded image and a figment of his imagination could keep him calm through a process he'd come to dread, what would a friendship with Logan be like? Virgil resolved to try. He'd be too scared to approach just for his own sake but being more calm would help Thomas as well as himself. Well, that was his excuse, he also just really wanted to see Logan. Still, he'd do anything to keep Thomas safe, play the villain, pull all-nighters crafting carefully designed risk assessments, upset Patton by keeping Thomas inside, argue with Roman even though that sword scared him to death, even leave his room.

As he shuts the door behind him he feels a little of his safety net slip away and flips up his hood to hide behind. “oh, THERE you are Sir-” Roman stops mid-insult and mid-corridor, “uh, friendo. We were beginning to worry.” Virgil turns and hoo boy, yup, Roman's as aggressively cheerful as ever. He seems to almost lighten up the mindscape itself and as a self-proclaimed creature of darkness, Virgil ain't about that. He raises an eyebrow and does his best to bring down the mood. “Sir Friendo? I don't think it's your best by a long shot, young padawan.” “That's not what I- ugh whatever.” Princey's hands flap in an offended manner before settling into a dramatic pose. “What's up with padawan anyway? It's not much better, Bitch Black.” “I'd have thought a Disney fanatic like you would know Star Wars is part of the franchise now and everyone can see that when it comes to clever insults, you are the apprentice and I am the Snark Lord.” Virgil pauses for emphasis. “...padawan.” Roman splutters, staggering as if he's been physically stabbed in the back, “And I was going to be nice! Humph. Well, I suppose, as a prince,” he pulls out a mirror to fix his hair and summons a comb “I can be gracious.” Now he's just checking different angles to make sure his highlight looks bomb from all directions. It does, it's Roman, but Virgil's not gonna be the one to tell him. He waits for a solid minute before realising Princey's not gonna stop gazing into his own eyes anytime soon and clears his throat. “So, uh, the nice thing? Just you know, I'm a busy facet. Got demons to summon, fear to spread, goosebumps to give.” The mirror snaps shut and Roman focuses his intense gaze on what he can see of Virgil's face under the hood. “Fishing for compliments, are we, Virgil-mort?” His smirk softens, posture shifting from confrontational to friendly. “Look, me and Patton,” Patton and I, whispers the Logan in Virgil's mind. “noticed Thomas wasn't really as nervous about posting this time. Sure he had enough anxiety to make sure all the settings were right but he wasn't scared. You really got the balance right.” He lays a soft hand on Virgil's shoulder. “We're proud of you.” The praise settles gently around him like a blanket and he hunches slightly, unused to the warm weight of it.

Roman waits a moment before it becomes clear Virgil's too surprised to react. “I'll let you go spread fear, there's no-one else I'd trust Thomas' safety with.” He grins at the gaping side, pleased to have finally one-upped him, and squeezes past to get to Patton's room. “I... thanks Roman.” Virgil whispers to himself in an empty corridor. He takes a moment to breathe and grins. With the help of his friends, he can do this.

His gaze lands on Logan's door, the smooth, unblemished navy paint standing out at the top of a row of glittery stickers, faded black marred by deep gouges, and intricate illustrations, reminding him why he's standing like a lemon outside his own door. He strides forward and pauses, rehearsing, knock twice, open, say hello, ok go. He knocks once, oh shit, can't do this, uhh crap, time to panic. The door swings open and he looks up at Logan from his slightly hunched posture, his hood falling back and leaving his face exposed. “Ah, Virgil. I wasn't expecting a visit, but, please, come in.” Logan lights up with a warm smile and gestures for him to step over the threshold. Virgil steps forward on autopilot, even as he protests. “Are you sure? If you're busy, I can-” “Virgil.” Logan cuts him off gently but firmly. “If I was busy I would have mentioned it. What is on your mind?” Virgil swallows. He'd planned a friendly outing and he was sure Logan would like it but now he's nervous. Fuck. “Well, uh, I was planning on checking out the memory of that time Thomas went camping and uh, saw the stars,” he chances a glance up and Logan's face has frozen. He speeds up, trying to get his idea out before it's shot down. “You like the stars and uh, I was wondering ifyou'dliketocome. Uh, to the memory... with me.” He clarifies, speaking too much but the silence is awkward and Logan's not looking pleased and oh god, he'd thought this was a GOOD idea. “Cos, um, I don't know much about constellations, and, um...”

“Virgil...” Logan starts. He sighs, walking to look out of the window. “I recognise that I may have given you the wrong idea in the past, I'm not the best with,” He pulls a face. “emotional signals. However, I identify as aromantic and, as such, will not be available for any... dalliances of a less than platonic nature.” Well now Virgil's just confused. He attempts to show Logan acceptance but wonders what this has to do with a star-gazing trip. Unless Logan is trusting him with part of his identity? Maybe they're closer friends than he thought already. “That's, uh, the thing where you don't date people, right? That's, uh, cool, I guess, um...” He trails off, unsure of what Logan wants from him. He just wants to know what the other side thinks of his idea. “So for the star-gazing...?” Logan frowns. “I would not be comfortable going on a romantic outing.” Virgil looks at him with horror. Does he really think Virgil would disrespect his identity like that, just after Logan came out? “No!” Logan starts and looks away from the window for the first time in this conversation. “um, as friends?” He smiles nervously but it fades as Logan shakes his head slowly, returning his gaze outside. “I fear that would not be wise given how it was planned.” Oh. He'd made Logan uncomfortable, hadn't reacted the right way to him opening up, pushed his own agenda when he clearly didn't feel like going out tonight, he was so dumb. “Right.” Virgil murmured, trying to save face through his embarrassment. “Another time?” Logan smiled tightly. “Perhaps.” “Ok. I'll, uh, see you around.” He salutes casually and shuts the door softly behind him. He gets back to his own room and thunks his head against the scarred wood of his door. See you around. They're literally different parts of the same person, who even says that? No wonder Logan doesn't want to be his friend. Too awkward. Too much work. Too much Anxiety. That made him pause, reminded him why he was there in the first place. He couldn't give up this easily, what would Thomas think? He'll show Logan, he's gonna be the best goddamn friend he's ever had.

[notafeeling]

Reassurances

A/N Have a sleepily-typed low-quality fic for day two of the 2k celebrationsssssss (pls love me)

Pairing: LAMP/polyam (Logic/Anxiety/Morality/Prince)

Genre: fluff, not so much hurt/comfort more so reassuring (thus the name)

Warnings: insecurities, negative self-talk, an unedited mess

Word Count: 1580

Summary:

No matter how long they had been dating, some things would never change. Such as Virgil’s stutter, Patton’s laugh, Roman’s superiority complex and Logan’s perfectionism. The others knew those flaws, but the didn’t mind them. If anything, they only loved each other more for it.

It happened whenever Virgil got particularly anxious. His thoughts would all rush out of his mouth at once, words tripping over each other and causing an awful stutter, which, of course, only made things worse.

Thomas was working on a big project, and the deadline was looming over them all. Virgil tried to keep it in, because his boyfriends shouldn’t have to deal with his anxieties when they were already working so hard, but they did tell him to come to them and-

He was yanked out of his haze by Roman insistently snapping his fingers in front of his face.

“Virgil? Is something troubling you?”

Virge saw Roman’s hand resting on the hilt of his sword and his frown, and he wouldn’t have been able to stop it even if he tried. All his doubts funnelled out.

“It- it won’t- we won’t- it’s not- not finished- we won’t- it won’t work! Won’t work- then- then everyone will- they’ll hate u-us- and- and- and- I’m sorry- sorry, sorry, sorry! I tried- trying- it’s going to fail- we’re not going to finish- I don’t-“

Tears of frustration pricked at his eyes. Why did he have to stutter? The words stopping coming entirely, and all that was left was an invisible rope around his lungs, forcing his breath out in short gasps. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Dumb stutter, dumb me, dumb everything! They hate me. They hate me because they’re looking at me and hate my stutter and hate me, hate me, hate-

He was pressed into soft grey and he vaguely recognised Patton’s warm arms around him. Roman was counting up to four, then seven, then eight and Virgil realised he was supposed to breathe along. Logan’s steady hands were rubbing his back as he talked through his worries.

Eventually, Virge relaxed into them and allowed them to calm him down.

And, he thought as he was being squeezed and comforted, maybe the stutter wasn’t as embarrassing as he thought.

-

Sometimes, when Patton was feeling particularly emotional, usually due to an ongoing event in Thomas’ life, he’d guard his laugh. The others despised this time, because even though they rarely said it aloud, they loved Patton’s infectious giggle. It was the happiest sound on earth, and was as light and bubbly as the man himself.

Loving it didn’t change the fact that Patton refused to let a chuckle slip though. They had tried everything – even Logan gave in and cracked a few dad jokes! All they gained was a weak smile for their efforts.

Defeated, Virgil slumped into his hoodie, Roman put away the sword he had been juggling and Logan sighed.

All the while, Patton didn’t say a word. He was too busy thinking, thinking, thinking. As the moral side, any unethical situation affected him on a personal level, regardless of whether it had anything to do with him or not. He didn’t have time for silly games and jokes when people were suffering.

Morality wasn’t going to mess around when he could be out there, helping. He knew that it was impossible, for there was the matter of distance and money, but he still felt guilty. However, he would never admit this to his boyfriends, because…

Because that would be troubling them, wouldn’t it? He couldn’t bear to upset them – so he wouldn’t. And he won’t laugh, because then he wouldn’t be taking anything seriously, and that wasn’t the right thing to do.

If only Roman hadn’t approached him from behind and started attacking – no, tickling – his sides. Patton startled into the air and Roman swept him up, while Logan joined the battle. Virgil was the only one left, anxiously chewing his lip as he watched it unfold.

Patton’s mouth opened in a surprised chuckle and oh, how he loved them all. When Logan stopped running his fingers along Morality’s sides and Roman had stopped spinning them, he reached out for Virge and attacked his stomach.

A tickle fight broke out and, well, maybe enjoying the little things wasn’t wasting time.

-

It wasn’t as if Roman didn’t know that he could be a tad too arrogant sometimes.

In fact, he was all too aware of the fact. When they had started dating, he had toned the act down a little, but it flared up without his consent every now and again.

When he came clean about it to the others, Logan had dubbed it a ‘superiority complex’, which, in his words, was ‘a psychological defence mechanism acting as an attitude of superiority that often conceals a person’s inferiority complex’.

Roman liked having a name to it. He didn’t like that knowing the name didn’t helped him solve any of his problems.

As the prince out of the four, he should be able to tough it out and not resort to such an inelegant way of conduct. He wasn’t smart like Logan, caring like Patton or as diligent as Virgil, so he was left with… With bravery and creativity. Except he wasn’t that.

He couldn’t be, not when he rarely helped with coming up with solutions for problems nor stepped up to any daring task. He was simply a fraud. There was nothing going for him, and he knew that.

So why did Patton, Logan and Virgil love him? Why didn’t they accept that perhaps arrogance was all Roman was good for and move on? They deserved better than a wannabe royal.

Why didn’t they see that?

He found himself voicing this when they were in the middle of a movie. It had slipped out without him really realising it, but Logan paused the movie, Virge was frowning and Patton glanced up from his spot resting against Prince’s chest.

They shouldn’t be concerned. Not after how he had treated them all in the past. They deserved better, though they didn’t think so.

“Roman, do you have something you would like to tell us?” Patton asked, sitting upright now.

The others waited for him to speak. Feeling the biting thoughts pick up in pace as they swirled around his head, Roman forced a beaming smile. “No, everything’s peachy! I’m Prince Roman, in case you’ve forgotten. I was just- just testing you guys. Your reactions really were quite funny, you should have seen-“

The rest of his sentence died in his throat when Logan arched an eyebrow at him. “Ro,” (Ah, a nickname, Logan really must be worried) “do not speak to us like that.”

Roman hung his head and choked out a sorry. Why did he have to do this every single time?

“You know, Princey, you can just tell us when you’re feel down. It’s not like we’d judge you. Especially not me, of all people. I mean, seriously,” Virgil gestured at himself in explanation.

“Exactly! Roman, we love you, no matter what! Flaws and all!” Patton chimed in.

Logan nodded. “If it would provide you with reassurance, I could compose a list of all the times you’ve helped Thomas.”

“I could murder whoever made you feel that way in the first place,” offered Virge.

“And I’ll bring cookies!”

Roman shook his head, smiling a little. He was glad they knew him better than anyone else, especially when his insecurities flared up and he inflated his ego to overcompensate.

-

“Logan, come to bed!” Patton whined for what must have been the fifth time that hour.

The facet only focussed harder on the blurring page in front of him. He had to get this done. It didn’t matter that his head was pounding and he couldn’t see straight – he was on a roll now. And if he didn’t get it all done at once, then he’d never get it done. Besides, if he did it all perfectly now, then he’d be free-

Patton plonked himself in Logan’s arms and clung onto him. “Logan, I’m now a baby koala trying to find my bed! You gotta help me!”

“Patton, koalas don’t have beds.”

His boyfriend pouted at him, but Logan only leaned around him to try and see his working-

“Oi, nerds! You coming to bed or what?” It’s one in the morning and a Prince needs his beauty sleep! Plus, if you keep making so much noise, Virgil will wake up and he won’t ever get back to sleep-“

“What the fuck is happening here?” Virge walked into the room, yawning and rubbing his eyes. “Logan, are you kidding me? You’re not going to get that finished at this rate. Just give in.”

“No,” Logan ground out. “I am not ‘giving in’. This is far too important and far too imperfect for me to just say good enough! It’s not good enough! It’s not nearly good enough, so I’d appreciate it if you all left me alone.”

Patton slammed Logan’s book shut, drawing out an enraged cry from the logical side. “Nope, none of that. We’re all going to bed right now!”

Logan looked at the three of them in turn. Logically, there was an infinitesimal chance that he’d be able to convince the stubborn gits that working until this was done was the right way to go about things, so he… took Virgil’s advice.

He slumped into his chair and let an overjoyed Patton carry him off to their bedroom, followed by Roman giving a sleepy Virge a piggyback.

They got into bed and curled up against each other. He was so at peace like this, he wonder if perhaps he should trade his perfectionism for this ideal scene more often.