#zach: smASH the fourth wall

[number-one-micoverse-fan]

“Beware the Fury of a Patient Man”

Quote by John Dryden

Dom’s on a mission. And he’s not going to stop until he sees it through to the end. Even if it costs him. Warnings: blood, graphic descriptions of violence, injuries, angst, gun violence, acts of violence against children

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Dom wrestled the gun away from his assailant and slammed the butt of it into the man’s head. Then he did it again. And again. And by the fourth time there was blood splattering hot and fresh across his hand and the man wasn’t moving.

It took a minute to catch his breath again, casting a wide-eyed gaze around him to make sure no one had come running to investigate the noise. But the yard remained dark and undisturbed, and Dom climbed to his feet, legs shaking, clutching the gun in his hand tight enough to make his fingers ache with the grip. He was already tired, his body sore and drained from tracking the van all the way out to the run down house outside of town.

But he wasn’t going to leave without doing what had to be done.

Breathing shallow to muffle the noise, Dom crept around the back of the house, his steps as light as he could make them on the dry grass. There were only a few lights on inside, filtered through grimy windows and barely lighting the night. None of the windows were open and Dom didn’t dare try them, expecting them to creak or at least make too much noise for him to safely enter. There was a sliding back door, however, and Dom pressed himself against the side of the house, squinting through the dirty glass to try and see what was inside. An empty dining area, cluttered with garbage and broken chairs, and what looked like a kitchen, cleaner but only just.

Dom bit his lip as he hooked his fingers into the door handle and carefully applied pressure. It stuck, at first, and then gave way with a low hiss and a dull creak. Dom froze, ears straining to listen for footsteps. When nothing happened, he eased the door open further, squirming through it, trying to suck in his stomach, his back scraping against the threshold. He thought about leaving the door open, making an easy escape route, but if someone noticed then it could spell trouble if they suspected an intruder was in the house.

There was muffled laughter from somewhere above him, the sound of floorboards shifting under foot, tangled with the dull buzz of a television or radio.

Good, they were distracted.

Dom didn’t know how many there were, but he hoped they were all in the room upstairs.

He moved quietly through the house, sticking close to the walls and trying to move only when there was an influx of noise. It felt like it was taking him hours to make his way towards the sounds, even longer on the stairs, and more than anything he wanted to charge down the hall and kick the door in like an action hero. But he kept his slow and steady pace, heart pounding in his chest, mouth dry, palms sweaty where he gripped the gun.

The sound of the television was louder, coming from a cracked open door at the end of the hall, blue light flickering across old floorboards.

Very carefully, Dom nudged the door open further, blinking in the brighter light of the room. His gaze swept over the room, searching. There was a television on an old shelf against the opposite wall, backlighting the three adults sitting on the couch, laughing and chattering to one another. Dom eased forward, trying to see into the shadowy corners, and the floor creaked under him.

He froze.

“Ey, Jamis, you get them beers already?” One of the men on the couch turned to look over the back of it towards the door. He frowned when he didn’t see his friend, but Dom, his mouth opening to call out.

Dom pulled the trigger.

Blood exploded out of the man’s skull and he went flying off the couch to crash to the floor.

The other two were on their feet in an instant, one of them throwing himself forward in front of the couch and the other diving over the armrest to roll away. Dom followed the one who’d jumped the arm rest with his gun, firing off a few more rounds, splinters from the wooden floor erupting where he missed.

A movement in the corner of his eye made him turn and he saw the first man scrambling to his feet. Dom aimed the gun to fire but his hand froze, finger brushing the trigger without pulling it.

Because as the man rose to his feet, he had someone else with him.

Cody.

The boy was wrapped painfully tight in duct tape, a piece pressed over his mouth, bucking against the hold of the man whose arm was around his neck. There were tears streaking down Cody’s face, his eyes wide and terrified, rolling wildly until they locked on Dom. Then he made a desperate sound behind the tape and Dom could only hear his son’s voice desperately calling for help.

It made white hot rage over power the cold fear in his heart.

But before he could move, the second man dived at him, knocking them both to the floor where they scuffled. The man sat on his chest, pinning him to the floor, and grabbed Dom’s wrist that held the gun, slamming Dom’s hand into the floor over and over, trying to get him to drop it. Dom snarled at him, using his free hand to try and claw at the man’s face. The man twisted away from him, taking a second to punch him in the face a few times until Dom’s head was spinning. He felt his grip on the gun weaken and a growl escaped him. His head darted forward and he sunk his teeth into his attacker’s arm as hard as he could.

The man screamed, trying to wrench away and beat him off. Dom took the opportunity to throw them both to the side, rolling over so he was the one on top, and tried to point the gun at the man’s head. The man struggled, shoving at Dom’s face and clawing at his throat, trying to strangle him.

“DROP THE GUN OR I KILL THE KID!”

Dom froze, head snapping around to stare up at the first man.

He was still holding Cody pressed against his chest, an arm around his neck. In the other hand he held a gun pressed against Cody’s temple.

The man under Dom shoved him off and wrenched the gun away, kicking Dom in face as he got to his feet. Dom felt his nose crunch and coughed as blood splashed down his face, eyes watering with pain.

“Shiiitt,” The second man hissed, checking the gun, “This guy killed Zach! And probably Jamis too, I think this is his gun.”

“Just kill him,” The first man lowered his own gun, but kept his grip on Cody who was still struggling and thrashing, “We’re gonna have to burn this place down anyhow, it’s been compromised. We can—OW! WHAT THE FUCK!”

“Hey! How the hell did he do that!?” The second man abandoned Dom and ran around to the front of the couch to see what was going on.

Dom took the opportunity to scramble to his feet, breathing heavily through his mouth. The first man had dropped Cody, who was now squirming backwards across the floor as best he could, and was more preoccupied by the second captive. Milo had sunk his teeth into the man’s ankle and wasn’t letting go, even when the man started kicking and punching at him. What was astounding was that Milo had clearly been gagged with duct tape too, remnants of it still clinging to his face. There was blood on his face too, but it was hard to tell if that was from Milo or from the man he was biting. The second man was pulling at Milo’s legs, trying to pry him off, but that only had the first man screaming at him to cut it out and pry the little shit’s mouth open.

Dom wasn’t going to let them lay another hand on those kids.

He launched himself over the back of the couch with a roar, shoving the second man down hard enough that he smashed his head into the shelf and lay on the floor groaning. Before the first man could level his gun, Dom snatched the one from the second man’s limp hand and fired. The bullet punched the first man in the stomach, making him stagger back. While he was recovering, Dom shot the second man in the head and scrambled to his feet to charge the first man, the last enemy standing.

But his opponent was quicker.

There was the crack of a gunshot and Dom felt something hot and sharp bloom in his side. Another one ripped into his shoulder and his arm dropped limply to his side. Dom ignored it. There were more important things to take care of.

He screamed at his son’s kidnapper, firing his own gun again and clipping the man’s leg. He dropped to one knee and Dom bowled into him, sending the two of them sprawling. Both of their guns flew from their hands. The man yelled and squirmed, punching at Dom, but Dom barely felt the blows, his one remaining hand clawing at the man’s face through watering eyes, blood, and wailing fists. Teeth scraped his knuckles and then his fingers found a fistful of the man’s hair. Dom clenched it, pulled the man’s head up, and slammed it back into the floor as hard as he could. His opponent shouted and his hands paused their wild punching, one of them remaining to claw stupidly Dom’s shirt.

Dom could only see red, his heartbeat thudding in his ears. He lifted the man’s head again and, again, slammed it into the floor. And again. And again.

Distant pain wrenched in his stomach but he shoved it to the back of his mind. His only focus was on getting rid of the monster that had hurt these children.

He slammed the man’s head down again. And again. Again, again, again. Even when the body under him stopped moving, he kept mindlessly smashing the broken skull into the floor, blood soaking his hands and staining his jeans, his breathing labored and wheezing.

It was only a sniffling whimper that snapped him out of it.

“Cody…” He croaked, looking around.

The boy was curled on the floor, eyes squeezed shut, shivering and crying. Dom staggered to his feet, wincing and putting a hand to his front, only to have his fingers bump against the handle of a knife. Ah. He’d been stabbed.

Gritting his teeth, Dom pulled the knife from his stomach, choking down the pained noise that wanted to leave him as blood rapidly stained his already ruined shirt. Couldn’t let Cody know how hurt he was.

Breathing heavily, Dom dropped to his knees next to his son and put a hand on his shoulder. Cody started and pulled away, eyes snapping wide open.

“Sh, sh, Cody, it’s okay, it’s me,” Dom murmured. His touch had left a red hand print on his son’s shoulder. He tried not to think about it, “I—I’m going to cut the duct tape. It will probably hurt, I’m sorry.”

He slid the knife carefully into a gap and began to saw at the tape, first cutting loose Cody’s arms, then his legs. Peeling the tape off did make Cody whimper and fresh tears sprout in his eyes, but he took it like a champ. Dom was extra careful with the piece of his mouth and as soon as Cody was free, he threw himself into Dom’s arm, sobbing into his chest. Dom winced at the pressure on his wounds but wrapped his good arm around his son reassuringly,

“I’m s-sorry I didn’t come sooner. It’s okay now. You’re safe. I promise, you’re safe. Will you h-help me with Milo?”

Cody sniffed and nodded, clutching at Dom as the man shuffled across the floor to kneel next to Milo. The kid was a lot more battered than Cody, blood oozing from a split in his forehead where he’d been kicked, matting his hair, one of his eyes already swelling shut. It looked like he’d ripped through the duct tape on his face with the edge of something sharp because it had cut into his cheek, leaving it to bleed freely down his chin and into his mouth.

“A nail,” Milo explained with a feral grin while Cody picked the remains of the tape off of his friend’s face and Dom cut him loose, “It was sticking out of the floor a little and I used it to rip off the tape!”

“It’s probably infected,” Cody said in a shaky voice but he was smiling as he helped Milo to his feet. Dom smiled tiredly at the pair, leaning heavily on the wall as he stood up, one hand pressed over the hole in his stomach. There was a slice in his side, hot blood still leaking down his pant leg, and his shoulder ached something fierce, but it was worth it. The kids were safe.

“Let’s get outside,” He said weakly, making sure to keep a smile on his face when they looked at him. He followed them out of the room, down the stairs, and out the front door where he sagged onto the steps with a sigh. The van was parked in the drive and he’d thought to take it and drive them home but he was too worn out now; probably wouldn’t have been able to stay awake for the journey. He reached a shaky, blood soaked hand into his pocket and tugged out his phone,

“C-Cody…need you to call…call…” His vision blurred and he heard his son shouting his name and then Dom fell into darkness and knew nothing at all.

———

He woke up in in a white room with tubes and wires attached to him and a dull pain throbbing distantly through his numb body. Sleep tugged at him, urging him to go back to sleep again, but Dom struggled against it as his bleary gaze roamed around the room.

Miranda was slumped in a chair behind him, asleep, circles under her eyes and her hair in the messiest ponytail Dom had ever seen. She looked beautiful. Like an angel in the white room.

He shifted slightly to call to her when he felt something warm and heavy pressed against him. He looked down slowly and felt instant relief and comfort and warmth fill him.

Cody was tucked against his side, cleaned up and with a few bandages, but looking none the worse for wear. His hands were fisted into Dom’s blanket, head against Dom’s chest, having squirmed carefully under Dom’s arm. His glasses were crooked; he’d probably fallen asleep with them on.

Dom smiled, very faintly, tiredly, and let himself relax. His eyes closed.

They were safe.

Everything would be okay.

[siremasterlawrence]

The King Of The World Finale.

Zach walks out of his house at the same time as I am and he spots me as he waves his hand my way.I walk over shaking his hand in a firm way as I look into his eyes an he stops. He is completely frozen in time as I take him to the side of his home. I kiss him as he can’t be responsive except for the growth of his cock.

I press my body onto his as I am make out with him and he falls more under my spell. His body is so weak as it falls back into the house. His body leans on the wall as I smell his breath an kiss him one last time. “You love me you always have Zach you just have finally admit it to me.” He says to me.

“You will spend your life serving me an taking care of me for all for eternity.” I tell him as he wakes up from trance smiling at me with a lot of excitement. He pushes me to the wall kissing me as his cock is tightened. “Master, I am so in love with you deep in and out of my soul my love. Now come here.” He says to me.

“What the fucking hell are you to doing in our back yard?” I hear us brother scream from a few feet away but I ignore him. Zach takes him by his hand as he smashes him into the wall. He holds him as he looks at me an grabs him by his arm pits. He makes him face me as I smile at him and he leans in again.

I kiss his brother who spits out of disgust an I burst into laughter as I feel a warm buzz inside. I look at him as he tries to fight me but he looks back at me. “Now Tom you will do as I say because I am your only Master. You need me to love, own, control and transform you all the time.” I command him as he is looking up at me lovingly.

He pushes Zach away as he grabs my hand an is pulling me into hot bear hug. His hug was so hot as well as tight as I smell his breath full of alcohol. I smack his butt so hard as he jumps in excitement it felts so good to maintain control.I kiss him tenderly as he leads both of us back inside and I hate him a little less.

We walk back inside to find Henry him the third brother sitting on the chair in the living room. He looks at us as we walk in drinking with a glass in one hand. A hefty bottle of vodka in the other as he pours some more for us. “I hate you the most but that will change soon enough. You Henry are my slave, lover and property never forget.” I tell him.

“I will never forget.” He repeats in robotic tone as he looks up to me rising to his feet. “Please you cant don’t walk away from me Master Lawrence.” He says to me as he backs me into the wall an he falls onto on me. His breath is hot when he holds me down as he descends into a kiss.

“I love you my King and only you more than you will ever know.” He says to me. He kisses me again it feels so hot this time as he kisses me more. I lay on the bed as he is climbing onto me and lands all over my body. He wraps his arms around me as he fall into a hot kiss action.

“You love us all but you want our brother Chris don’t you Master? We need you to love us to so we shall get him for you forever our love.” They say as they rush into

a fourth room around the corner a few minutes later I see them. They are actually carrying Chris so hot in a drunking slumber. I kiss him as he stirs awake.

They drop him on the chair they are holding down as I bend a bit down to face him. “Chris don’t even try to worry your Master is here for all eternity. I am the one who you love and desire complete in all ways. I am the only one that can make you tick because I am your everything.” I continue on as I am the only one matters.

He kisses me as he shoves into his lap an wraps his arms around me very tightly. He looks in my eyes as he wants a sign of my love he is happy to receive it. I am all that is what makes him tick and all that matters to him. “Master, will you marry me please?” He ask me as he won’t let me go until I answer.

The end.

[tearlessrain]

all right time for Scorpion King: Book of Souls Liveblog Part 2

we last left bootleg xena and zach mcgowan’s abs in ancient egyptian jello narnia with a mostly naked lady who is also a book and her wildly unnecessary comic relief rock golem friend and there might even have been hints of a plot. I have a feeling it’s only downhill from here.

we’re back to the people who gallop around menacingly on horses and their completely normal bird that keeps getting screentime for some reason. their specific objectives remain unclear, as they have been for the entire movie.

oh hey they found the mad max tribe, maybe there actually was a point to the interlude earlier

shut up mediocre henchman 5 I still hate you

hm, nope, still no point to this. they just rode away again. menacingly.

please someone make the cockney rock golem stop talking

she has been trying to seduce matthias since she first came on screen and despite the fact that they’ve known each other for five minutes I have a sinking feeling that it’s going to work before this movie is over

ookay the rock golem is afraid of fire, that makes sense.

WHAT IS SO IMPORTANT ABOUT THIS BIRD IT’S A NORMAL GODDAMN BIRD IT HASN’T DONE ANYTHING

oh thank god they’re leaving the rock golem behind in jello narnia

living the dream, book lady

yep here we go with the romantic subplot nobody asked for between two people who met like three hours ago at most

is he the only man she’s ever seen because like. talk about setting the bar high

here come the menacing riders, riding menacingly

NOBODY LIKES YOU, MEDIOCRE HENCHMAN 5

oh yes I think xena’s finally gonna kill this fucker

and now we can just watch zach mcgowan kill people which is really what 90% of the movie’s content should have been in the first place

HE KILLED MEDIOCRE HENCHMAN 5 WE ARE FREE.

oh fuck the rock golem is back and they’re bringing him to a market

this movie’s plot is so vague as to be on the verge of doing a full 180 into “dadaist masterpiece”

now I’m not saying I expected better from the direct to DVD fifth sequel of a spinoff of a reboot of The Mummy but it needs to be said just once: why is the scorpion king a white guy

okay there we go back to killing people don’t worry about things like plot and why they all have vaguely british accents

ah he has learned from the last time he beat up a bunch of ninjas, no getting shot this time

[Black Sails theme playing on a single kazoo in the distance]

at least the boat’s too small for them to get any time alone together and progress the unneeded romance

oh hey it’s glowy eye dude who we haven’t seen since the prologue despite his being the main antagonist. I like that dude. mostly for his rad aesthetic.

ooooh glowy eye dude killed bootleg xena’s brother who we’ve literally never seen or heard of before book lady explained it

and apparently she’s the last remaining heir so we’ve got the queen of nubia, the king of... scorpions, I guess, a human book, and a golem all on a boat. I feel like I’ve literally been in this D&D party.

there’s that bird again seriously why, there had better be payoff for this. maybe the bird is secretly anubis or something. which would be weird, since anubis is the one with the jackal head, but I can’t think of another reason to keep drawing this much attention to it.

there had also better be a damn good payoff to the golem being afraid of fire because it’s getting really annoying

OH MY GOD A GIANT ROCK

they very clearly didn’t give zach mcgowan any direction regarding what accent he’s supposed to have because he’s just trying them all out

imagine if he’d just smashed the head clean off that stone sphynx and it turned out there was nothing in there

book lady has taken over for prologue narrator I guess

what is with this anubis, this is like a deviantart anubis. this is just “abs for days: the movie”

okay evil xena, “men are simple” isn’t really a fair thing to say considering you shot him with a poison dart. falling over after someone shoots you with a poison dart isn’t really a gendered thing. and like she didn’t try to seduce him first or anything she just walked in, shot him, and said that as if it was somehow relevant.

oh it’s the mad max tribe yet again. maybe THIS time they’ll have a purpose.

nope they’re just here to comment as the plot coincidentally passes them on the way to somewhere else. okay.

okay so maybe the blacksmithing and hunting and badass fighting and full on nudity haven’t been enough to distract you from how bad the writing is. don’t worry fam we’ve got you.

it’s like they’ve got a checklist or something

at least the ugly and useless leather armor thing is gone though

okay know what as an aside, shoutout to this random ass bird that gets almost as much screentime as the actual protagonist yet has done nothing except completely normal bird things for the entire movie

“before I kill him let’s see how he fights” well you just signed your own death sentence. see even your wife who can see the fourth wall knows this is a mistake.

glow eye dude is entirely too good of an actor for the lines he was given, this is like watching jeremy irons in eragon

wow I mean you could just kill book lady, setting her on fire seems excessive.

uh I was joking before but he appparently actually is the literal king of scorpions. and getting stung by them is I guess what activates his powers. being the scorpion king SUCKS.

wow it didn’t half work though, he just samsoned right out of those chains. good thing it wasn’t a bamboo and string cage, or he would have been trapped for good.

hell yeah finally a showdown between glow eye dude and zach mcgowan. this is why I’m here.

wait, the mad max tribe is back. maybe THIS time they’ll do something relevant!

yeah there they go. finally. killed psychic wife

random bird approves.

and now it’s just everybody fighting everybody so in other words the movie is looking up

evil xena vs good xena FIGHT

I can’t believe the fucking golem was the one who finally destroyed the sword.

so now the mcguffan is just freaking gone and matthias and evil guy are just punching the shit out of each other for the hell of it and I’m not even mad

I mean I guess one of them still has to be defeated but still

he just fuckin Simba’d that guy right into the fire

like can we please take a moment to appreciate that this is the exact fight choreography and aesthetic from the lion king

to the point that there was a literal lion roar sound as the guy died??? I’m not even kidding what the hell

“and we helped!” - the mad max tribe

oh the sword wasn’t destroyed. but at least the rock golem is gone so that’s something.

“remember who you aaaaaare” - the mad max tribe

ooooh he must choose between destroying the evil sword and the life of book lady, his true love who he met yesterday

I mean don’t get me wrong I’m sad to see her go she was one of the least annoying characters, but still you could have cut out the mad max tribe and developed her more so this would have more impact

aaaand THERE’s the obligatory tragic kiss

honestly though know what I can’t begrudge her this, it’s not like I wouldn’t do the same thing if I were a human book living alone in a tomb and some absurdly attractive dude just showed up one day and was like “climb on my horse so we can gallop sexily across a beach.” that’s completely reasonable.

matthias... I don’t feel so good...

(I’m sorry I had to)

that looks like it should be the cover of a drug store romance novel. maybe after the cowboy fad dies the next one will be “white guys who are kings of ancient egypt for absolutely no discernable reason”

NARRATOR! I missed you my dude.

he never forgot his destiny again. still no mention of exactly what his destiny is or even what exactly he’s king of aside from about two dozen literal scorpions

but seriously “getting stung by scorpions” is the absolute worst superpower ever. no wonder he abandoned his destiny to be a blacksmith, I would too.

there he goes

well that was pretty much exactly what I expected it to be but somehow even more so. gratuitous fanservice and absolutely no substance or meaningful plot, 10/10 would not watch again but had a great time watching it once. roughly on par with Eragon but this time ancient egypt flavored.

that bird never ended up doing anything, by the way. 10/10 completely useless but extremely photogenic bird.

[animegirl266]

Moving On|| Jonah Marais|| Why Don’t We Imagine

 A requested imagine by @heartattackfandom

Your P.O.V.

“Ha! Fourth win in a row Y/N. What does losing feel like, cuz I sure as hell wouldn’t know.” Jack teases me as the words KNOCK OUT appear on the TV. We had been playing 1 v. 1 for the last half hour and for some reason I couldn’t keep my head in the game. I throw the controller to Corbyn who had called the next match a few minutes ago, “All your’s, bud.”

“Your streak is about to end, bro. Prepare yourself.” Corbyn smirks at Jack, taking my place on the couch as I crawl over to Jonah who had been sitting a few feet away, watching the match. I make myself comfortable in his lap, resting my head against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. 

He plants a kiss on the top of my head, “You okay?” Jonah asks, rubbing my arm gently. 

“She’s probably just bummed out because I beat her so many times.” Jack suggests smugly. I whip my head around, glaring at him. His eyes are glued to the screen and doesn’t notice as I snag a pillow from the the couch. I throw it as hard as I possibly can at his face, causing him to drop the xbox controller. Before Jack has time to recover, Corbyn delivers a deadly blow, winning the match. 

“WHOOO!” Corbyn throws his arms up in excitement. Jack gives me a death stare and I return the favor by sticking my tongue out at him, and nestle back into Jonah’s arms. He laughs, making his shoulders shake and my head bobs up and down against him.

Jonah and I sit together at the kitchen island scrolling through Instagram. “You ain’t gotta make your mind up. You ain’t gotta make your mind up right now. Right now, no rush, no pressure.” He starts singing and I instantly join in, that being my favorite song by Justin Bieber. We are half way through the second verse when I mess up on the lyrics. Jonah instantly looks up at me. “You sure you’re okay? You know that song forwards and backwards.” He raises an eyebrow at me. 

I nod and smile, “Sorry. I guess I just have a lot on my mind right now.” 

“Oooh, you thinking about that love song you’re writing for Jonah?” Zach teases, making kissy faces. 

“Shut up!” I laugh. 

Zach was only half right. I was thinking about the song I’m writing, but it’s not about Jonah. All the boys assume that because I’m writing a song it has to be about Jonah, well it’s really not. 

Before I met Jonah, or any of the boys,I was in a relationship that ended pretty badly. We were together for a whole year,though I had known him for what seemed like forever. I thought he was my soulmate - someone I couldn’t live without. I was dead wrong.

I sit on Jonah’s bed, looming over my notebook where I’m writing my song. 

You took me for everything I was worth and left me to fend for myself.

I let you take and did’t expect anything in return.

You soar into the sky while I’m stuck on the ground. 

I made the same mistake twice, never again. 

The rest of the song gets even more bitter. Even though the lyrics came from my own heart, a place I thought was full of love, all I see is hate in my writing. I crumple up the paper and leave it on the bed to go shower. 

After my shower, I put my hair up in a bun and head back to Jonah’s room where I find all five of the boys huddled around his bed. “What’s going on in here?” I ask with furrowed brows. All five boys’ heads snap in my direction, a mixture or sadness and worry on their faces. 

As I get closer, I notice my crinkled lyrics in Zach’s hand. “I certainly hope this isn’t about Jonah...” He says awkwardly, dropping the paper on the bed and shuffles out, followed by Corbyn and Jack. As Daniel passes, he places a hand on my shoulder, and leaves, closing the door behind him.

A swirl of emotions rushes through me. I feel rage. I feel like curling up in a ball and crying. I feel betrayed. I feel like smashing my fist into a wall. Memories rise in my mind and my heart beats wildly in my chest.

I don’t even realize I’m shaking until Jonah steadies my hands with his. He pulls me into his chest, wrapping his arms around me tight, and before I know it I’m bawling. I don’t know where the tears come from, but they don’t stop. 

We stay up all night talking. I tell him every little thing that’s been bothering me. I tell him about my ex. I tell Jonah how much I need him -  how much I love him. 

He takes my face in his hands, looking me right in the eyes. “We’re gonna get through this -  together. All you need is a push in the right direction to move on... and I think I can give you that push.” He smiles and kisses me tenderly. When I break the kiss, I rest my forehead against his. “I love you, Y/N.” He whispers.

My ex, the last two years disappear from my head, and all that’s left is me, Jonah, and our future. I think that maybe... just maybe, I might have moved on already.

[mixtapekings]

Listen Review of Run The Jewels’ ‘RTJ4’ Album by djbooth.net

“…a shotgun blast to the face.”

Run The Jewels thrives on the spirit of rebellion. The duo, consisting of Atlanta rapper Killer Mike and New York rapper/producer El-P, has grown from indie one-off to one of the most impressive second winds in rap history. Their music finds the middle ground between cartoonish purist rap thrills and anarchic grit. At their very best, Mike and El-P will have you ready to burn everything in sight.

While RTJ’s music has always maintained an anti-establishment bent, the aggression on their 2016 album Run the Jewels 3, in particular, was channeled through the prism of revolt. In the wake of the deaths of Trayvon Martin and Michael Brown and the election of the 45th President of the United States, RTJ’s lawless spirit made them, however unintentionally, uniquely suited to address a world coming apart at the seams.

In the face of Armageddon, RTJ’s message hit differently. Four years later, with another wave of protests taking place in response to Black death looming large over the world, Run the Jewels are offering their fourth album, aptly titled RTJ4. 

The public needs music directly speaking to the times. Mike and El’s timing is perfect; the stakes have never been higher. Let’s see if the Jewel Runners are up to the challenge.

In usual 1-Listen fashion, the rules are the same: no rewinds, pauses, or skips—a straight shot through followed by my gut reactions. Let’s ride.

1. “Yankee & The Brave (ep. 4)”

Killer Mike opening with DaBaby speed. Man, these drums are THUMPING. “I’mma terrorize the actors playing like they want some drama.” No holds barred. Mike and El-P play rap hot potato like no other. El is floating. “I’m ready to mob on all these charlatans.” The beat sounds like a John Carpenter score stripped for parts and hooked to some boomers. “I can’t let the pig take me, I got too much pride / I meant it when I said it, never take me alive.” This exact energy is what I was hoping for. Revolt music right off rip. No brakes, all nitrous. “Yankee & The Brave” is how you open an album.

2. “Ooh LA LA” feat. Greg Nice & DJ Premier

Did El-P source his drums from fucking mortars? These boys are monstrous. El’s beats are big enough to walk through. I don’t like this hook. Greg Nice’s voice is grating. “When we usher in chaos, remember we did it smiling.” They may be smiling, but Mike and El sound pissed. “Ooh LA LA” isn’t playful music; it’s angry. This song doesn’t leave me shaking the way “Yankee & The Brave” did, but it’s still a nice jolt of catharsis. Premier scratches are always a plus. I’m glad he’s still so revered by rappers across generations.

3. “Out of Sight” feat. 2 Chainz

El-P made a beat out of jumping vocal cuts that would sound at home on a post-apocalyptic workout tape. He never fails to impress. I love hearing references to Public Enemy’s “My Uzi Weighs A Ton.” Mike and El are trading off lines. “I’m only doing what I want by hocking loogies at the swine.” I see why they wanted to push this project up two days. Forget “F*ck The Police,” this is FUCK THE FUCKING COPS. Mike caught a CRAZY flow and held onto it forever. The energy is stabbing me in the chest. If you’ve ever downed a bag of Pop Rocks with nails inside, then, and only then, will you understand the power of “Out Of Sight.” Here comes 2 Chainz. One mention of growing up in poverty, but the rest of his verse is just soulless flexing. It’s not 2 Chainz’ fault, but I’m not tryna hear his verse right now.

4. “Holy Calamafuck”

A reggae sample to start things off. And everything just devolved into a 404 error. The beat is actively falling apart. A line about jacking Supreme jackets and calling out hypebeasts. Are those record scratches or Windows 95 program glitches? I can’t keep my head straight. A line about drones and time elves. “Every other goddamn year I’m brand new / It’s been 20-plus years, you think that’s a clue?” TALK YOUR SHIT, EL. Since the Def Jux days. Mike and El stood the test of time, gotta respect it. These two were born to rap together. “PTSD, streets did the damage.” Mike is pouring his heart out. If the streets run red with blood, “Holy Calamafuck” will be the soundtrack.

5. “Goonies vs. E.T.”

These drums and synths were sourced from space. Mike and El are rapping for their lives. “Goonies vs. E.T.” is pure fucking chaos. How did they keep their heads together recording over this beat? E.T.’s healing touch couldn’t help them. The hook’s not doing much for me—it feels like dead space—but the beat is breathing. Man, this shit is manic. I’m on a sugar high. “The revolution is televised and digitized.” All facts. Mike has one of the most potent rap voices. I can’t see his face, but I know there’s fire in his eyes. “This is people with an attitude in Beverly Hills.” Making people uncomfortable is progress.

6. “Walking In The Snow”

A nice crunchy guitar riff to incite more chaos. The beat just cracked open, and now it sounds like a fucking Tesla coil. I feel more compelled to type the word “fuck” than I ever have during a review. “All oppression’s borne of lies.” El has been talking that talk all across this shit. El sounds like a preacher. “Just got done walking in the snow / Goddamn that muhfucka cold.” Who’s rapping on the hook? OH SHIT, IT’S GANGSTA BOO. Nice surprise. OG needs more love. “Every day on the evening news, they feed you fear for free.” Mike is laying everything out. “I can’t breathe.” That line really hurt. “The most you get is a Twitter rant and called a tragedy.” He’s just talking at this point. Brutal. I know he was fighting back the tears rapping this one. The beat is mutating like crazy. I can’t keep up—breathless rap music at its finest. I love love LOVE this song, holy shit.

7. “Ju$t” feat. Zach De La Rocha & Pharrell Williams

It’s the famous four-count! Pharrell must’ve had a hand in production along with El-P. Pharrell’s voice doesn’t fit into the cracks of this hook; it’s distracting. “Look at all these slave masters posing on your dollar.” Mike is doing call-and-response with himself. He’s talking about corporations co-opting marijuana and pedophiles in high places. “Confuscious say you’d better thug out.” That got me. El has a thing for turning voices into drum patterns. These beats are fun but they will also turn around and rip your throat out if you try them. Here comes Mr. Rage himself, Zach De La Rocha. His voice cuts through everything. I love how analog his voice sounds. He sounds fired up. I’ll take another Rage Against the Machine album, please. Without Pharrell, “Ju$t” would be close to perfect.

8. “Never Look Back”

A little techno bounce to start “Never Look Back.” All I can see in my head is Tron light cycles burning digitized vapors. Was that a Pop Smoke bar? His death still hurts. Mike and El managing to rap about current events and not sound lame is amazing. No other rapper their age could pull off a TikTok bar. Mike is rapping about his mother. Did she pass? Man, that’s heavy. So that’s why it’s called “Never Look Back.” “All that matter is gratitude. Gratitude is everything.” Who’s speaking right now? Can’t make it out. El is talking about how he never saw class or race as a child. Mike follows with, “Never look back, you’ll only be bitter / If you get bitter, you’ll never get better.” They’re confronting demons. RTJ4 feels as immediate and punchy as Mike and El’s respective solo work. Ending with a ticking timer, always coming through with the relief.

9. “The Ground Below”

Is this nu-metal I’m hearing? These guitars and smashing drums are super silly, even by RTJ standards. They rapping, though. “Screaming fuck the world and you can drink what’s coming from my urethra.” El always knows how to rap familiar shit differently. “Not saying it’s a conspiracy but you’re all against me.” Funny. A weird melange of sounds and images, and I’m not sure what to make of it. The raps are crazy, and the beat is kinda growing on me. Easy to believe them saying, “The money never meant much” when they’ve been giving out their albums for free since 2013.

10. “Pulling The Pin” feat. Josh Homme & Mavis Staples

Okay, last two tracks. If you’re gonna name a track “Pulling The Pin,” there’d better be an explosion. Ominous marching and some warbled vocals. “These old foxes got a lot of plots to outfox us.” El hit that Aesop Rock flow real quick. Those chorus vocals are ghostly. Josh Homme is a name I haven’t heard in a long time. Shout out Queens of The Stone Age. “Every cage built needs an occupant.” Is that Mavis Staples? It is! Her vocals are so rich. Staples finding space in this interstellar mayhem is wild. Mavis is my favorite feature so far. There’s much less frivolous shit-talking this time, especially from Mike. “Kicking and screaming while watching the demons collecting the gold and the diamond residuals.” Career-best rapping from Mike. More Mavis, thank God. “There’s a grenade in my heart.”

11. “A Few Words for The Firing Squad (Radiation)”

RTJ4 has been a ride. Ending with the firing squad can’t be a good sign. El starts with a short tribute to his wife. Touching. Mike back to rapping about asking his mom to cling to life. His kids, his wife, and his craft have made him a better man. These are death-bed confessions set to music. Mike and El must be rapping blindfolded, standing in front of the wall and the firing squad. Heartbreaking. “Last word to the firing squad was ‘Fuck you, too.’” Kicking and screaming. It sounds like we’re going out with a big instrumental explosion—saxophone, brass, and reverbed synths and choirs. This is BIG.

Where do Mike and El find the energy to keep expanding their sound like this?

Oh, we’re not done yet.

A narrator is laying down the story of two rebels forced together by the odds. They’re still running with this Yankee & The Brave angle. It’s playing like an end credits song. So… The whole thing’s been a TV show? I’ll admit, this takes away some from the immediacy of Mike and El’s message.

Final (First Listen) Thoughts On Run the Jewels’ RTJ4:

Run the Jewels dropping their fourth album in the middle of a global pandemic and a nationwide uprising is perfect.

The duo crafted a potent mix of braggadocio and political and personal reflection set to beats made for video game boss battles. Both Mike and El deliver career-best work behind the mic, and El-P’s production has only grown more expansive.

Golden-era boom-bap (“Out of Sight,” “Holy Calamafuck”), and murky synth-scapes (“Never Look Back”) are flayed and split open to create digitized warzones. They’re as frantic and restless as the rappers pushing them to their limits.

From beginning to end, RTJ4 is a shotgun blast to the face; an album to turn up to 11 while the precincts burn. Pent-up emotions shoot through every bar, every beat, and every second of breathing room. The anti-police sentiment couldn’t be more timely.

The only time the momentum drags on RTJ4 is when other voices cram into the frame. Several features are either inappropriate (2 Chainz on “Out of Sight”) or distracting (Pharrell on “Ju$t”).

Unintentionally, the running motif of the Yankee & The Brave TV show stifles some of the immediacy from Mike and El’s best verses to date. Maybe the TV show angle will age better in a world where the president didn’t just declare war on his fellow citizens.

Minor missteps aside, Mike and EL understand the stakes at hand. RTJ4 mixes the punchy and the profoundly personal with cartoonish zeal, EPMD by way of Adult Swim’s Superjail! 

Politically and musically, Run the Jewels are done asking for favors. RTJ4 is five-finger discount rap at its finest.

from Listen Review of Run The Jewels’ ‘RTJ4’ Album by djbooth.net

[amerimemedia]

By Corey Floyd I know currently that most of you are probably watching some Disney+ and that’s perfectly fine, but hear me out for just a second, I was on Netflix, the other day and stumbled upon an interesting little nugget of a show. What do you get when you cross Lord of the flies, mad Max fury Road, and Anna John Hughes's movie? You get a show called Daybreak! It’s a funny, quiet, action-packed and smart meta dark comedy. This is one of those shows that prove that despite losing a lot of Disney related content on their platform they still have quite a diverse arsenal.  The cast is quite an interesting group of people you’ve seen once or twice, and they added a legend… for the sauce. The main character is Josh Wheeler, a young smart Canadian thrown into a Californian wasteland. He is played by Colin Ford who has been working steadily over the last 10 years mostly on the show “Under the Dome.” Then we have Austin Crute who is doing really well for himself. He first appeared on the scene as Justin Bieber in the hip hop/ Twin Peaks phenomenon known as Atlanta. He also delivered comedy gold in the criminally underrated movie “Booksmart.” In “Daybreak” he is Wesley Fists who has to juggle a lot of internal issues on top of avoiding a zombie-like death. Then you have the Legend Matthew Broderick. The golden boy of screen and stage plays the kindhearted cannibal principal.  Ferris Bueller has literally left the building.  The show is very creative in its tone even while giving you character narration that breaks the fourth wall. It doesn’t smash the fourth wall like Deadpool, it’s softer… think Zach Morris from saved by the bell. The overall story of the season is about Josh trying to save his “true love” Samaria in a post-apocalyptic setting that divides the town into different groups. The separation is literally based on their social status prior to the bomb going off and of course, the largest group is the jocks. They go full Fury Road and it’s hilarious and scary. There are a few other sets that have their own work and their own creed something that hopefully you’ll check out as soon as possible.  The writing staff is a lot of fresh faces and I believe that for some, this may be their big break. If they have a head writer, I’m sure it’s Aron Eli Coleite. He was a writer on “Heroes” and “Crossing Jordan.” The writing staff has a real good knack for world-building as well as dark humor.  I know there might be some post-apocalyptic fatigue going on. The Walking Dead is still a thing plus some of my fellow gamers are playing Death Stranding. But, I have to say this is a surprisingly good show and you need to go check it out. That’s why I’m doing my best not to get into spoiler territory.  But there’s one thing I do wanna say take everything the narrators say with a huge spoonful of salt. You won’t be disappointed.  Hey, family new podcast is up on youtube!

http://www.amerimewire.com/2019/12/daybreak-on-netflix.html

[slapshotreelmedia]

2017 Review: Film and TV

It’s that time of year when awards season is in full swing and we take a look back at the films and television shows which shaped the year, along with those in the film industry who moulded them into modern masterpieces. With the Golden Globes and Academy Awards fast approaching, here are some of the film and television highlights from 2017 and a summary of a fantastic year for both the small and silver screens.

TOP 10 FILMS OF 2017

1. DUNKIRK

Director: Christopher Nolan

Starring: Fionn Whitehead, Mark Rylance, Kenneth Branagh and Tom Hardy Taking top spot is the masterpiece that is Christopher Nolan’s ‘Dunkirk’. The master of paralell storylines is at his cinematic best with a stunningly shot and beautifully executed piece of cinema which combines the harrowing realism of one of history’s most important stories with the humanistic heroics of those who fought on the land, in the air and at sea. Bold, beautful and one of the great modern war movies of our time

Defining Moment: The spectacular aerial dogfights.

2. THE GREATEST SHOWMAN

Director: Michael Gracey

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Zac Efron, Zendaya, Michelle Williams, Keala Settle and Rebecca Ferguson

Roll up, roll up for a cinematic experience that is colourful, uplifting and a joyous celebration of all that is unique and special. Hugh Jackman’s trademark charisma and song and dance skills drive this spectacular movie musical with brilliant support from Zac Efron, Zendaya, Michelle Williams and a talented ensemble cast. Toe-tappingly special and a great show indeed!

Defining Moment: Jackman and Efron play master and apprentice in a slick bar room duet.

3. LOGAN

Director: James Mangold

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Dafne Keen and Boyd Holbrook Jackman dons the claws one final time for what is potentially the most brutal and brilliant ‘superhero’ film put to celluloid. Old Man Logan is channelled as Hugh rips and shreds his way through the bitterness of Logan’s ageing body and Wolverine persona. This character driven piece is a fitting send off for a brilliant franchise and a tribute to Jackman’s commitment to the role over 17 years!

Defining Moment: X23 is born.

4. PADDINGTON 2

Director: Paul King

Starring: Ben Whishaw, Hugh Bonneville, Sally Hawkins, Julie Walters, Hugh Grant, Brendan Gleeson and Peter Capaldi

Sweet, charming and endearing only begin to describe the charm of this absolute gem about the adventures and misadventures of the little bear from darkest Peru. Everything a good family film should be with some of the cream of British acting and a spirit that will warm the hearts of young, old and even bears.

Defining Moment: Paddington’s daring train chase with the assistance of the Brown’s.

5. THOR: RAGNAROK

Director: Taika Waititi

Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Tom Hiddleston, Cate Blanchett, Idris Elba and Jeff Goldblum

We all knew this was going to be good but oh boy, what arrived was unexpected and slick! Director Taika Watiti breathed an amazing sense of colour, fun and scintilating humour to the franchise, with Chris Hemsworth and Tom Hiddleston at their heroic best as Thor and Loki. Wildly colourful and a dazzling spectacle!

Defining Moment: The final bridge battle.

6. GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOLUME 2

Director: James Gunn

Starring: Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana, Dave Bautista, Bradley Cooper and Vin Diesel

Riding the giddy success of the first instalment, the second Guardians of the Galaxy is just as good, if not better than the original with the colourful characters (and the cute as ever Groot) combining with the intergalactic setting and rollicking soundtrack to create yet another smash hit!

Defining Moment: Groot’s boogie time opening sequence.

7. KINGSMAN: THE GOLDEN CIRCLE

Director: Matthew Vaughn

Starring: Taron Egerton, Mark Strong, Colin Firth, Channing Tatum and Julianne Moore

The surprise hit of 2014 gets a worthy sequel with even more ultra violence, chaos and quintesential British charm than the original. Introducing even more colourful, crazy and often sadistic characters to the insanity, The Golden Circle grabs you, shakes you around and doesn’t let go!

Defining Moment: Mountaintop cable cars come tumbling down.

8. BEAUTY AND THE BEAST

Director: Bill Condon

Starring: Emma Watson, Dan Stevens, Luke Evans, Josh Gad, Ewan McGregor, Ian McKellan, Kevin Kline and Emma Thompson

With the animated original regarded as one of the best animated films of all time, this live action adaptation had a lot to live up to. With an all star cast, Bill Condon at the helm and brand new original songs to compliment the classics from the original, this was something truly special. It beautifully captured the magical essence of the story whilst bringing it to a new generation in a dazzling manner.

Defining Moment: The magical first dance. Just like the original if not better!

9. THE MAN WHO INVENTED CHRISTMAS

Director: Bharat Nalluri

Starring: Dan Stevens, Christopher Plummer, Johnathan Pryce, Miriam Margoyles and Morfydd Clark

Flying largely under the radar, this exquisite looking film cleverly combines the magical story of ‘A Christmas Carol’ with the tale of its creation as Dan Stevens’ Charles Dickens faces hardships and even the spirits of his own characters on the road to creating a masterpiece. Truly warms the heart and chock full of Christmas cheer.

Defining Moment: Dickens faces his childhood demons at the workhouse and a classic is born.

10. MURDER ON THE ORIENT EXPRESS

Director: Kenneth Branagh

Starring: Kenneth Branagh, Johnny Depp, Judi Dench, Michelle Pfeiffer, Daisy Ridley, Josh Gad, Penelope Cruz and Willem Dafoe

The latest Christie adaptation puts Kenneth Branagh at the helm and sees him donning the famous moustache of Hercule Poirot. Largely disregarded by critics, this is a handsome looking film with a talented cast and plenty of twists and turns, complimented by an atmospheric soundtrack. Top notch filmmaking.

Defining Moment: Poirot creates a line up and solves the final puzzle.

Honourable Mentions:

- Baby Driver (Director: Edgar Wright)

- Manchester By The Sea (Director: Kenneth Lonergan)

- Lion (Director: Garth Davis)

- War for the Planet of the Apes (Director: Matt Reeves)

- Going in Style (Director: Zach Braff)

- The Accountant (Director: Gavin O’Connor)

- Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales (Directors: Joachim Ronning and Espen Sandberg)

TOP 10 TELEVISION SHOWS OF 2017

1. GAME OF THRONES (HBO)

Creators: David Benioff and D.BWeiss

Starring: Lena Headey, Kit Harington, Peter Dinklage, Emilia Clarke, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Sophie Turner and Maisie Williams

The HBO juggernaut continued with it’s hotly anticipated seventh season and it didn’t disappoint. With the effects and characters developing and the plotlines becoming even more thrillling (if that was even possible), this was television at it’s very best and a testament to why the small screen is beginning to rival the big screen in terms of quality and content. The Army of the Dead are here, as is Winter and I for one can’t wait to see what Season 8 brings!

Defining Moment: Dragons meet the Wall! 2. STRANGER THINGS (Netflix)

Creators: Matt and Ross Duffer

Starring: Winona Ryder, David Harbour, Finn Wolfhard, Millie Bobby Brown, Gaten Materazzo, Caleb McLaughlin and Noah Schnapp

One of the most unique and gripping shows of the last couple of years returned for Season 2 and threw viewers right back into the retro eighties feel of Hawkins, Indiana. A return to the upside down was also on the cards as this gem blended eighties style with science fiction thrills in a seamless manner. The predominantly youthful cast were brilliant as always as were the excellent adult cast members. Thrilling, terrifying and one of the best of the year!

Defining Moment: Steve and Billy face off in a brutal showdown. 3. DOCTOR WHO (BBC)

Creator: Sydney Newman

Starring: Peter Capaldi, Pearl Mackie, Matt Lucas, Michelle Gomez and David Bradley

With sonic sunglasses and guitar in tow, Peter Capaldi’s twelth doctor returned to battle supernatural and extra terrestrial forces one more time in his farewell season. Bringing a frenetic ‘rockstar’ quality to the famous character, Capaldi’s take on the timelord will be missed but has paved the way for a bit of history with Jodie Whittaker set to take the reigns as the series’ first female doctor. Geronimo, Allons-y and bring it on!

Defining Moment: Doctor, I let you go. An emotional regeneration. 4. SHERLOCK (BBC)

Creators: Mark Gatiss and Steven Moffat

Starring: Benedict Cumberbatch, Martin Freeman, Amanda Abbington, Mark Gatiss and Una Stubbs

After what seemed like an eternal wait, the game was afoot once again as Sherlock and Watson returned for their fourth outing. The three episodes were some of the strongest of the series thus far with episode three ‘The Final Problem’ proving to be a psychological thrill ride that was impossible to turn away from. Here’s hoping for a return by the dynamic duo, but if this season did prove to be the end, what a way to go out!

Defining Moment: The incredible final psychological game! 5. A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS (Netflix)

Creator: Daniel Handler aka Lemony Snicket

Starring: Neil Patrick Harris, Patrick Warburton, Malina Weissman, Louis Hynes, K. Todd Freeman and Presley Smith

After 2004’s ill fated Jim Carrey driven film adaptation, Netflix and Neil Patrick Harris took the reigns for this dark take on Lemony’s Snicket’s dreary series. What they produce is creative, quirky and very clever with Patrick Harris encapsulating the slimy nature of the multi-persona Count Olaf perfectly. With a second and third season alread ordered, this is set to continue to be a fantastic adaptation that will delight young and old.

Defining Moment: Neil Patrick Harris’ colourful and outrageous transformations

6. THE CROWN (Sony/Netflix)

Creator: Peter Morgan

Starring: Claire Foy, Matt Smith and Victoria Hamilton

With the first season an award winning success, Claire Foy and Matt Smith reprise their roles of Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip as the ‘semi-fictionlised’ history of the monarchy is explored throughout the 1950’s. The relationship between Elizabeth and Phillip are delved into as is the connection between the Monarchy and the people as key moments from 20th Century history act as narrative drivers in this perfectly pitched drama.

Defining Moment: Scandal rocks the royals 7. FULLER HOUSE (Netflix)

Creator: Jeff Franklin

Starring: Candace Cameron Bure, Jodie Sweetin, Andrea Barber, Juan Pablo di Pace, Scott Weinger, John Brotherton and Adam Hagenbuch

It is the era of nostalgia with plenty of reboots and re-imagining in the world of film and television. In the 1980’s, viewers fell in love with the Tanner family in ‘Full House’. Now, a third season of the series which re-visits the charm of that same full house has been released. With more hijinks from DJ’s two boys as well as an adventure into Kimmy’s childhood home, this season is fun, colourful and brings back all the charm of the original with more to boot.

Defining Moment: The final musical moment 8. THE GRAND TOUR (Amazon)

Starring: Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May

Bringing back the sheanigans and larrakin charm which brought about 22 hugely successful seasons of Top Gear, hosts Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May crash and bash their way across the globe, finding every possible brand of car, lorrie, helicopter and every other mode of transport inbetween. Highly entertaining, supremely funny and not just for car enthusiasts.

Defining Moment: Clarkson, Hammond and May attempt Operation Desert Stumble 9. BROOKLYN NINE NINE (NBC/Fox)

Creators: Daniel J. Goor and Michael Schur

Starring: Andy Samberg, Melissa Fumero, Terry Crewes, Stephanie Beatriz, Joe Lo Truglio, Chelsea Peretti and Andre Braugher

The Nine Nine is back! Jake Peralta and the loveable gang from the ninety ninth precinct are back to their old tricks. With Peralta and Captain Holt starting the season in witness protection and the fourth instalment in the ever entertaining Halloween heist, Brooklyn Nine Nine hits the funny bone with every joke and is getting better and better!

Defining Moment: Halloween heist IV 10. JACK WHITEHALL: TRAVELS WITH MY FATHER (Netflix)

Starring: Jack Whitehall and Michael Whitehall

Flying under the radar, this little known Netflix series is not to be missed. Awkward British comedian Jack Whitehall (of Bad Education and Fresh Meat fame) decides to take a delayed ‘Gap Year’ and spend several weeks in Asia. The catch, he decides to take his stuffy father Michael along for the ride. What results is a hilarious mis-match of holiday shenanigans with Jack leaping into new experiences and Michael taking the educated upper class approach to holidaying. Great Bristish comedy!

Defining Moment: Jack and Michael come face to face with Steven Seagal

Honourable Mentions:

- The Worst Witch (Creator: Jill Murphy)

- The Ranch (Creators: Jim Patterson and Don Reo)

- Riverdale (Creator: Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa) - Shooter (Creator: John Hlavin) - 13 Reasons Why (Creator: Brian Yorkey) - Wet Hot American Summer: 10 Years Later (Creators: Michael Showalter and David Wain) - All Round To Mrs Brown’s (Creator: Brendan O’Carroll) - A Christmas Story Live (Directors: Scott Ellis and Alex Rudzinski) - Will and Grace. (Creators: David Kohan and Max Mutchnick)

2017 FILM AND TELEVISION MVP’S

NETFLIX

The streaming juggernaut takes Television’s top crown for 2017. With digital content paving the way for the future of television, Netflix is certainly making the most of their popularity with over 50 million subscribers in the US and an estimated 7.6 million in Australia. With the subscription service now developing their own original content and the success of titles such as ‘Stranger Things’, ‘The Crown’, ‘Fuller House’ and ‘Riverdale’ there is no evidence of the service slowing down and 2018 is set to be even bigger!

HUGH JACKMAN

Australia’s favourite song and dance man and all round nice guy Hugh Jackman was a busy man in 2017, fronting two of the year’s biggest films in ‘Logan’ and ‘The Greatest Showman’. Both were major box office and critical successes. ‘Logan’ marked Jackman’s ninth outing as the clawed superhero and 17 years of playing the role whereas ‘The Greatest Showman’ saw him return to his musical roots, playing the inventor of the modern circus ‘PT Barnum’. The latter also allowed him to appear in the world’s first ever live movie commercial which aired during NBC’s broadcast of ‘A Christmas Story Live’.

EMMA WATSON

Starring in the year’s biggest box office success ‘Beauty and the Beast’ as well as alongside Tom Hanks in the more limited released ‘The Circle’, Emma Watson is certainly developing a wide and varied filmography. Not only is she gracing the silver screen with both her acting and singing abilities, she has proven a powerful figure in social and political arenas with her ‘He For She’ campaign assisting in the advancement and empowerment of women as well as acting as a UN Women Global Goodwill Ambassador. Not only a talented young actress but a remarkable young woman.

CHRISTOPHER NOLAN

The master of cerebral, non linear storytelling took on possibly his most ambitious task yet, telling a  story based on true events and one of history’s most important chapters. The experiences of WWII soldiers at Dunkirk ended up being the perfect fit for Christopher Nolan. His trademark hands-on approach allowed both the actors and audiences to get up close and personal with the experiences of soldiers and support personnel from the land, sea and air. Only Nolan could then add a storytelling element of three paralell experiences being told simultanously across three separate timelines. It was a filmmaking masterclass and one which should gain some much needed attention for the director come awards season.

KENNETH BRANAGH

One of Britain’s most esteemed film and theatre actor’s Kenneth Branagh was a name that appeared on billboards and fim screens many times throughout 2017. A powerful performance as Commander Bolton in Christopher Nolan’s ‘Dunkirk’ was followed up by a directorial and acting turn as the world’s most famous detective with the world’s coolest moustache Hercule Poirot in ‘Murder on the Orient Express’. Branagh’s directing and acting style are executed with style and without fuss and are always very entertaining to watch. He is set to reprise his role as Poirot in the next instalment ‘Death on the Nile’ which is currently in development.

DAN STEVENS

One of 2017’s breakout stars was Dan Stevens. Best known for his role as Matthew Crawley in Downton Abbey, Stevens appeared opposite Emma Watson as the Beast in ‘Beauty and the Beast’, donning a motion capture suit and releasing a stunning singing voice for the role. This was accompanied by a largely ‘under the radar’ role as Charles Dickens in the beutifully crafted ‘The Man Who Invented Christmas’. Stevens has also been busy on the small screen and will continue his work on the series ‘Legion’ into 2018. He is one to watch for sure.

TAIKA WAITITI

Hailing from New Zealand, director Taika Waititi captured attention with sleeper hits ‘What We Do In The Shadows’ (2014) and ‘Hunt for the Wilderpeople’ (2016). His quirky, dry humour style may not have seemed the right fit for a Marvel juggernaut, however he was inserted as director for 2017’s ‘Thor: Ragnarok’. What a stroke of genius it proved to be with one of Marvel’s best films to date. Waitit brought style, colour and his well timed, quirky humour to the film which was the best fun to hit the cinema this year.

DAISY RIDLEY

Appearing on billboards worldwide is now part of everyday life for Daisy Ridley who this year starred in both the highly anticipated ‘Star Wars: The Last Jedi’ and ‘Murder on the Orient Express’. She brought her acting strengths to both films and her character of Rey in Star Wars is now one of the modern franchise’s most popular. With appearances in ‘Ophelia’, ‘Peter Rabbit’ and ‘Star Wars Episode IX’ on the horizon, Ridley is hot property at the moment and is set to continue to wow audiences in 2018 and beyond

BENJ PASEK AND JUSTIN PAUL

Being thrust into the spotlight at last year’s Academy Awards for their lyric work on 2016 smash ‘La La Land’, musical dream team Benj Pasek and Justin Paul this year branched out on their own and produced some of the year’s best music. After the success of their Tony winning Broadway show ‘Dear Evan Hansen’, they returned to the world of film and television, penning original songs for the NBC Live Musical ‘A Christmas Story’ along with ‘The Greatest Showman’ for which they have been Golden Globe nominated. A young musical duo with plenty of talent and a bright future!

ONES TO WATCH IN 2018

Black Panther, The Shape of Water, Ready Player One, Avengers: Infinity War, Deadpool 2, Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, Ocean’s 8, Solo: A Star Wars Story, The Incredibles 2, Ant Man and the Wasp, Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again, X-Men: Dark Phoenix, The Nutcracker and the Four Realms, Holmes and Watson, Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald, Aquaman, Mary Poppins Returns and Bohemian Rhapsody