#you'd think there would be some sort of option that acknowledges the fact that you don't always go from house to house

[senadimell]

I'm normally a huge fan of USPS, and I still am, but it is very unfriendly to people without stable addresses. You can't forward your mail to a house you don't permanently live in (and have proof of residence in, like your name on a lease). If you want to forward your mail somewhere, your billing address has to either be the place you are sending it to or the place you just came from.

You can't get a P.O. box without proof of residence.

that said, however, I did learn that if you do not have an address, you can have mail sent to Your Name, General Mail, Town/Zipcode and pick it up at the post office.

[cripplecharacters]

hello! feel free to ignore me if this is slightly outside the boundaries of this account, but i'm a tabletop roleplaying game (ttrpg) designer looking for opinions on mechanics for disability in games.

my game specifically covers a lot of themes that, while not about disability, would make me feel remiss to not include some explicit mention of how physically/mentally disabled characters fit into the greater picture of the game. it has a specific focus on telling stories of diverse characters, for one, and on fighting the unfair capitalist systems that harm these marginalized groups.

my issue lies in how, exactly, to both treat this topic respectfully and make the characters not feel out of place or unbalanced. i've considered several options, and was curious to hear from a physically disabled perspective how to proceed (i am mentally ill & neurodivergent, but to my knowledge not physically disabled).

option one: mention that disabled characters of all kinds are encouraged, and talk about roleplaying them or provide resources for how to handle them respectfully, but don't apply any specific rules with hard mechanics or numbers to them. this option is least likely to be inadvertently misconstrued or written poorly on my part, but may make disability feel like a "flavour" side note.

option two: provide examples for some common disabilities on the mechanical effects (such as a low vision character rolling less dice on rolls to notice visual details) without any "counteracting" mechanics. this one gives mechanical weight to disability, so it feels less like an afterthought, but may discourage people from playing disabled characters as they would be more likely to fail than other characters.

option three: the above, but with mechanical incentives for roleplaying in a way that acknowledges the character's disability. a "benefit", but less "giving a blind character echolocation" and more "gain XP for showing your characters disability and any aids they use" (similar mechanics exist for following your character's goals/personality traits). this would make disabled characters be more on par mechanically with other characters, but i fear it may come across as... viewing disabled characters as not worth it without some sort of benefit, i suppose?

apologies for the long rambling message, but i'd love to hear which of these options (or another suggestion) you'd be happiest to see in a game written by someone who isn't physically disabled! this is far from the focus of my game, but it's still an important part of the greater theme that i'd love to be able to get right. thanks! (similarly, if there are any groups not covered in the "underrepresented but common disabilities" post from your FAQ that you'd want to see in a game, i'd also be happy to hear those!)

Hello!

First things first, thank you so much for thinking about this! This isn't something that most TTRGs consider and, as a massive nerd who plays DND, Pathfinder, and other tabletop games, this has always been a big pet peeve of mine since making a disabled character is always unnecessarily hard to do with the game mechanics and rarely works out well.

Most of the time, I have to talk to my GM about how to make it work in their game and, unfortunately, I'm often told they won't allow it because it's "too much trouble".

This is all just to say, I really love the idea here and the fact that you're actually thinking about these things and wanting to do well by them is great!

Now, taking a look at the options:

Option One

One of the unfortunate things that I see a lot is people that are too scared to get something wrong with representation (Or social justice on a broader scale) that they don't try to do it at all. With this current era of cancel culture and people's reactions to what they deem 'offensive', it's understandable to be a bit apprehensive but if you're approaching the subject from a place of respect and you're receptive to learning and improving, most people will appreciate the effort.

While this option does sidestep the main issue you've identified, I do think it sidesteps the attempt at making disability part of your game as well. You can encourage people to make disabled characters all you want but without any real content for them in the game, it won't do much.

If you do go with this option, I'd strongly suggest including some information on the culture of your world and how it relates to disability, both to provide more substance to the content and to give players a bit to go off of when making a disabled character.

Option Two

I like this option much more than the first one, though I do agree that it may discourage people from choosing to play a disabled character.

Within the game mechanics, I think it makes a lot of sense to have these kinds of effects but I would encourage you to include more variety with it. Disability isn't 'one size fits all' and two disabled people can have different needs, strengths, and experiences -- even if they have the exact same disability. Instead, I'd suggest going for a slightly different model that includes more choices.

For example, a character with low vision may:

- Roll lower on perception checks involving vision

or

- Have disadvantage with ranged weapons/attacks

or

- Have lower rolls/less success in dim lighting

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Having more options for how the character's disability affects them allows players to make a choice for how they want to play the character while also encouraging them to think more about how their character's disability might affect them and impact their life.

The examples given are all reflections of how blindness can affect somebody. Blind spots or blurry vision can make it more difficult to notice certain visual changes, severe nearsightedness can make it difficult to aim/focus on things that are far away, night blindness can make it difficult to see in the dark or in dim lighting, etc. That being said, there are dozens of other ways to go about this (Though I'd advise sticking to five options per disability at most to avoid overwhelming people).

Option Three

Personally, I like this one and the second option the most. Although I understand where your concerns are coming from, it feels less like it's implying that disabled characters have to be 'worth it' and more like it's just balancing it out.

Like with the second option, I'd suggest going for more of a choice model here where the player can pick what 'benefit' (For lack of better word) that their character has -- or even to choose no benefit at all.

Many physically disabled people develop our own skills or tools to compensate for where we struggle, whether this is an intentional decision or just something that happens.

For example, my boyfriend is paralyzed from the waist down and uses a wheelchair full time. As a result, he has kick-ass upper body strength from it.

Similarly, many deaf and hard of hearing people are more observant when it comes to visual cues and many blind people are more sensitive to other senses (Though, of course, the whole 'super senses' thing is a myth).

While this isn't true of all disabilities or all disabled people in general, it is something worth considering.

That being said, if you do decide to implement this option, make sure that the benefit makes sense for the disability or is related in some way and isn't just something random being tacked on -- that would make it seem more like a 'disabled characters need to be worthwhile' thing.

As a few extra notes:

If you go with the second or third option, I'd suggest separating the different stat effects into different types of disabilities. You don't need to go too into specifics with it but something like 'low vision/blindness/vision loss', 'deafness/hearing loss', 'limited mobility', and 'chronic illness' would work. While disabilities are more nuanced than this in real life, setting it up this way would keep it pretty simple and allow players to tweak the mechanics slightly for their own characters.

If you go with the first option, I'd probably avoid discussing how to roleplay disabled characters. Because roleplay and character development is much more open than stats and game mechanics are, showing one or two 'proper' ways to play a disabled character is more likely to reinforce stereotypes, dismiss certain experiences that disabled people have, or just come across as more of a 'lecture' than anything. The same goes for including information on what to avoid. I'd stick to providing information about your world and how disabilities are seen in them instead of giving instructions here.

I'd suggest including ways for players to bypass the mechanics of disability if they'd like to, even if their character is disabled. That would allow for a bit more freedom with how they portray their character and would also ensure that they aren't being 'penalized' (For lack of a better term) with their stats for playing a disabled character. As a bit of an example of what I mean: A character in DND could have been a criminal growing up without necessarily taking the Criminal/Spy background.

In general, I think as long as you're approaching this respectfully (Which you are!) and reaching out to physically disabled people for their input (Which you are!), you don't have to worry too much about misrepresenting it.

Cheers,

~ Mod Icarus

[aikoiya]

LoZ: Ganondorf Can Only Lose

I love how some fans will write about how the curse of Demise will just end if Hyrule abolishes the monarchy. Or how it'll end if Ganondorf kills everyone in the royal family.

Like, buddy, you don't seem to get how this works.

First off, Demise's curse has exactly zero to do with the "Royal Family" or the monarchy or even the land of Hyrule itself.

However, it has everything to do with the blood of the first Zelda & the Spirit of the Hero. So, that first option is out.

As for the other: Admittedly, at first glance, you'd assume that killing off the Royal Family of Hyrule would be the easiest means of ending the cycle, but you would be wrong.

Because here's the thing. That's honestly impossible. Like, people seem to forget that family trees aren't linear.

See, unless the Royal Family only ever has 1 child every generation (which we already know they don't based on Zelda 2 if nothing else), then that tree is going to flipping fork!

By TotK, pretty much every Hylian in Hyrule likely has at least a drop of Hylia's blood in them.

In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if this also includes Ganondorf, himself.

Remember, the Gerudo have to seek out mates from other races of human in order to persist into the future. And since the Gerudo live near Hyrule, naturally, they'd be most likely to choose Hylian men to reproduce with, so if that Hylian happens to have even a drop of Hylia's blood in them going back at least 10 generations, then they'd also be included in Demise's curse.

That's, like, 2032 people who would need to have not even remotely been related to the Royal Family in order to be excluded from the curse. And the Gerudo have never really put much, if any, emphasis on their fathers or grandfathers at all. In fact, it's only recently that the fact the Gerudo have fathers has even been acknowledged!

So, if every Hylian does have at least a drop of Hylia's blood, then after a point, so too would every Gerudo living near Hyrule. Which is kind of represented in how Ganondorf's goals are always detrimental to the Gerudo.

Like, yes, I believe that the Hylian Royal Family likely has the most direct blood ties to Hylia, but that's it. They have the most direct blood ties to her & seem to actively train as divine magic users.

And, depending on whether or not Hylia, or rather Sun, is also being reincarnated along with Link & Ganondorf, then it may also be said that every time she's being reborn, it sort of reinforces the Royal Family's ties to Hylia, & through them, the Hylian people as well.

As such, by TotK, in order to truly end the cycle by such a direct & inelegant means would mean that Ganondorf would literally need to exterminate the entirety of the Hylian & Sheikah races, as well as the Gerudo, including himself.

Which, like I said above, may be part of why Ganondorf's attempts at gaining control of Hyrule always end up doing some form of harm to the Gerudo. And, in fact, is likely why Calamity Ganon's attacks were so indiscriminate. Because, when you think about it, what are the Ganons, not the Ganondorfs, but the Ganons, other than Demise's hatred for both Hylia, the Hero, & everything else (but especially the first 2) distilled & unshackled by Ganondorf's humanity? Especially Calamity Ganon. Like, just look at what happens whenever Ganon wins. Hyrule becomes a hell on earth. Which, for a guy who says that he was jealous of Hyrule's prosperity, he certainly does a fine job of ruining everything that made it prosperous to begin with even when it's essentially his already.

So, no. That isn't exactly viable, sweetie.

In fact, literally the only viable method to end the cycle is to cut off the curse's main fuel source: Hatred.

You do that & the curse ends.

In other words, redemption isn't just an option. It's the only option.

LoZ General Masterlist

[goodluckclove]

hey clove! i'm taking an ap visual arts class this year and we need to do a "sustained investigation" aka create a series of works connecting to and exploring a theme. one i'm thinking about a lot is relating queer people and the essence of queerness to divinity and also the occult, as a lash-back at christian nationalism and a celebration of queer joy. some examples of this would be comparing the transmasculine experience to the christian creation narrative and gnc/genderfluid people to figures similar to dionysus. i'm still workshopping the concept, do you have any thoughts on this or experiences you'd be willing to share so i can think of specific pieces and ideas to explore?

also i recently bought a binder and i felt so pretty and masculine but at the same time felt this overwhelming freedom to be feminine. it was really cool and i've decided i'm going to grow my hair out long again. i felt a lot like scott, just having this sort of wild feminine whimsy, and it felt really nice

hope you're doing well!! glad you were able to relax a bit :))))

Dude I'm literally planning a short story about a transmasc man who forms a relationship from childhood with the voice of God. This is crazy. I'll tell you about it later but there's so much potential there and it's such a cool idea. The words virgin birth in terms of the virgin Mary herself being Jesus Christ. An idea of a god that arranged for the circumstances of something that has to grow into an intended outcome even if through struggle. A god that like learns from trans people and finds it interesting because it's different and it's the same and now people are making new genders? You made new ones? Why did it take this long for you to think of new ones? I threw up about five minutes ago because I am the child of severe alcoholics and yet if you allow me two cocktails my body will collapse on itself like a dying star.

Also fun fact you can still be Scott-core without your binder if you want. He's got a chest too. His secret is that if anyone tries to question the validity of a man with breasts he gets really, truly, openly bored and politely waits for them to make their point before changing the topic and not acknowledging what they said at all.

The binder sounds very useful though. I miss my old binder. If that's the thing that makes you feel powerful being masculine and feminine that's fucking radical as hell. Wear a pretty skirt and a cool shirt and put like a fucking scrunchie in your hair. There's so many options and if you're a guy or masc leaning person who takes advantage of them you are just objectively more interesting, case closed. Anyone who is locking themselves out of half the amount of baubles and drapery that exists because of gender or body type is at a strategic disadvantage.

I was going to say that if my man Scott saw you on the street he'd be proud, but I know he would be unable to perceive the potential risks or fears. He's so insufferably Non-judgemental that he could bump directly into you by accident and come out with no other thought than "I am the same height as who I believe to be a child".

Edgar, on the other hand, would absolutely stare at you too closely until they felt weird and looked away, but would think about your style and freedom on and off for days afterwards.

I need to sleep for a few hours you people need to stop being interesting and important to me.

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

What if Harry’s song lyrics aren’t always literal? Pregnancies and babies could be metaphors for other things, like projects or dreams. For instance, I’ve wondered if Kiwi might be about Harry’s relationship with the recording industry.

I think this anon really captures what I find frustrating about fandom discussion about lyrics (not really through any fault of its own - but just because the way it operates within discourse). The fact that 'what is Harry's song lyrics aren't always literal?' is put forward as an idea that might be pondered upon - as opposed to a baseline assumption that you'd need a lot of evidence before you acted as if it wasn't true - is infuriating to me.

I find fan discourse that treats lyrics as literally true and focuses on decoding them - one of the most tedious things about fandom, because of its lack of curiosity. Anyone who has listened to songwriters talk about their process knows that there's all sorts of different ways that songs relate to people lives, or not - and the starting point should always be allowing for these options.

When thinking about what the songwriter might mean a song to be about - or where the song might have come from for them (which can be interesting to speculate about - although they are slightly different) - I think it's important to start not from the lyrics themselves - but what we know about their process.

I think if you're going to speculate about lyrics - the important question to ask first is 'what do we know about how this songwriter writes and how they relate their writing to their life?' Otherwise it's like trying to guess what waterlilies look like after looking at a Monet, because you've seen both an actual Sunflower and the Van Gough picture of a sunflower.

And with Harry we don't have much to go on. He doesn't tell us much about what his lyrics mean to him or where they came from. To me there are two hints - both of which point the same way - and most of which mostly show how little we know.

The first is an interview with Mitch, where he mentions what he learned from Harry as a songwriter:

"It's a bit all over the place," he says. "The songs are all snapshots [of my life] but nothing's in order." The Grammy winner was keen to share his thoughts and emotions in a way that didn't alienate the listener, a trick he picked up from his good friend and frequent collaborator Styles. "Maybe this is something I picked up being a fly on the wall with Harry," Rowland says. "He's always asking, 'How can I make this relatable?' And I often don't know the answer to that, but I tried to make the songs open to interpretation." 

This doesn't tell us anything much about how Harry relates songs to his life - but it suggests that relateability to the audience is more important than specificity in Harry's songs (which is reasonably obvious from the songs themselves) and one solution is leaving the songs open to interpretation.

With two of the Harry's House songs Harry has presented a meaning that was not obvious from the song itself after the song was released - once directly with LomL and once indirectly with MFASR. I think that's very interesting when taken in context with what Mitch said (even if I think it's important to acknowledge that the meaning of MFASR in the video may not have been Harry's intended meaning when he wrote the song). I think that at least some of Harry's songs has a personal meaning that he's obscured. He's taken a feeling or experience, written a song about it, and then made it open to interpretation in a way that means that nobody would guess the original meaning unless they were told (the same is true of Ever Since New York)

That doesn't mean that's the only way Harry writes lyrics - I think it's reasonably clear that he intentionally plays into the fantasies he knows his audience has - although how he accesses that is a really big question. There are moments that casually match his life, but don't tell us much about any other aspect of the song ('I heard Jenny saying "Go get the kids from school"'). And there are a couple of songs that are linked to specific people - Cherry and Carolina.

All that I'm asking is that discussions about what Harry's album means from Harry starts from here - starts from what we do know. Rather than people just deciding that because they're making connections or want things to mean a particular thing - that's what they mean for Harry.

[hollowedwing]

Isekai-ed into Hawk's Life

Hawks x gn!winged!Reader

Warnings: ⚠️ Death!(at very beginning, it is an isekai), mentions of death throughout, some angst(??maybe not yet??), slight cursing

THIS WILL NOT FOLLOW A SPECIFIC TIMELINE IN THE MANGA

(so sorry i just, love, love, the idea of having wings)

(this is all my art, it is on IG, im just too embarrassed for people who know me irl to potentially find this xD Even though none of them have tumblr 👀 if you somehow recognize it...props to you?)

_________________________________

tbh, I can’t decide if I want this to have more than 1 part. 

Word count: ~1,800

_________________________________

You were on your way home from a long evening at your part time job. Before that you had already taken 2 finals that morning too.

You dragged your feet, exhausted, as you headed towards the crosswalk. Stopping at the edge as the traffic light turned green, you decided to pull out your phone and decided to watch a speed paint from your favorite artist who recently released a new video.

It just so happened it was a Hawks speed paint 👀

The light turned red and you slipped your phone into your pocket as your started to make your way across the street

little did you know this would be the last time you'd cross the street

A wild driver came barreling down the road, no regards for civilians or traffic lights, probably drunk or high or just someone out for blood.

You stood there like a deer caught in headlights as your life flashes before your eyes

You can barely comprehend what's happening as you felt pain engulf your body and suddenly you were unconscious

________________________________________

Keigo tiredly stumbled into his large apartment, kicking off his shoes and shrugging his jacket off by the door

He wants nothing more than to just flop down and pass out. The HPSC has been giving him hell lately about god knows what.

He let out a long sigh and headed towards the bathroom to do his nightly routine

As he finishes up, he drags his feet towards his bed and flops down face first into the comfort of his pillow and sheets

Keigo falls asleep almost instantly after getting into a comfortable position, worn out from a long day of work

What he wasn't expecting was a loud "thud!" coming from the main room. He jolts up from his bed, feathers ready to attack.

*******

Reader's pov(?)

*******

You groaned as you hit the floor. Your head was spinning and it feels like a truck just hit you

oh wait...

You suddenly became more alert, looking around in a panic, expecting to either be on the road and injured or in a hospital of sorts. What you didn't expect was a wooden floor inside of a random apartment.

You felt around your body for any signs of injury, but all you found were a set of wings on your back- wings?? Hold up. Why did you feel wings what kind of sick joke was this?

Your thoughts were racing as your breathing picked up. What was happening? Didn't you just get hit by a vehicle? Why are there wings in your back? Where are you even?

Feeling around in your pockets, you found your phone and whipped it out, trying for anything. You turned it on, the harsh light of it illuminating your face, you tried to send a text to your best friend, but alas, it wouldn't go through. Actually nothing on your phone seemed to work. You checked your location settings, for some reason it said Musutafu, Japan.

Wasn't....Wasn't that the location that most of Boku no Hero Academia took place?? This can't be right, this has to be a dream right? There's no way that you could have actually ended up here unless...

Then it hit you.

You read your fair share of isekai series back when you were alive in your realm. Mostly manhwas of characters getting reborn into another person's body, but, never actually reincarnating as yourself into another world.

That was the only thing you could think of. You must have been reincarnated into the Boku no Hero Academia world. Except as yourself.

In all honesty, this is not how you thought you'd go out. You didn't know what to expect after death, but this definitely wasn't it. After all, this was a fictional setting, wasn't it?

Well, not anymore because now you're living in it! Smh.

That would also probably explain the wings on your back. This was you now. You have a bird quirk.

Now, all you have to do, is figure out where the heck you are.

Just as you are about to stand up, feathers zip towards you, pinning you to the ground

You hear footsteps begin to come towards you. You don't know if you should be scared for your life considering you've already died once or ecstatic because, you knew for a fact, this could be none other than Hawks' apartment.

The winged hero finally emerges and stares down at you, crossing his arms over his chest.

He says in a low, gravely voice from sleep, "Who are you, and how did you get into my home?" You stare back up at him and nervously chuckle.

"I'm not sure you'd believe me if I told you." You nervously sigh out.

"Try me." He demands, sounding a little more irritated now. You sigh in defeat and start to explain your situation.

"Do...do you know what an isekai is?" You said sheepishly while turning your gaze away from his. He kind of gave you a confused head tilt and just a vibe that said “No”. You sigh again and explain it to the best of your ability. Hawks becomes more and more interested and confused as you talk, but nods a long slowly. 

“So...you were reborn here, but as yourself? Wait- does that mean you died before!?” He asked, disbelief and fear ran through his eyes. You looked at him in bitter amusement.

“Apparently I did. The last thing I remember of my world was getting hit by some truck or car. The dude clearly did not know how to drive. I had the right of way I was pretty sure at least. I mean, the light was red, usually that means pedestrians can cross the street? And plus he was going wayyy over the speed limit,” you begin to ramble on, the reality of actually dying setting into you. Hawks noticed the panic beginning to set into you and released you from his feathers. He crouched down next to you and grabbed your shoulders gently.

"Hey, hey, hey, look at me, you're ok now, right? You're here, and not dying in the middle of the street still. You're here. In Musutafu," he said trying to calm you back to reality. Well, what was your new reality. Your mind was racing. Trying to put together a coherent thought. 

You look up to him, with a panicked look still in your eyes, thoughts started to come out of your mouth as your brain was trying to catch up with the situation. "I'm... I'm in Boku no Hero Academia and, and you’re Keigo... standing... right in front of me..I have wings. I have wings? Jeezus I have fucking wings. And I’m dead in my own world. I don’t know anyone, well, wait, technically, I do know people, just-Oh gods! I’m so sorry, that name slipped out! I- I, I’m really sorry Hawks." Even in your wild state, you noticed Hawks tense up at the sound of being called Keigo by a total stranger, and were able to get out an apology. That was progress? You were slowly coming back to reality.

Hawks froze up a bit at the sound of hearing his real name mentioned. At first he wasn't sure if he believed your tale of the isekai situation, but after this he might have to reconsider it. He opted to shake off that weird feeling for now and focus on different matters. 

" I-I don't know what I'm supposed to do now? I have nowhere to go or to stay. I'm in a whole different freaking universe! My phone doesn't even hardly work here. And I have a pair of wings on my back!" You puffed them out angrily. Hawks glanced behind you and his eyes widened a little. You in fact, did have a set of bird wings. Kind of owl like wings. Not near as big as Hawks', but definitely big enough to fly you around.

Before Hawks could process the words coming out of his mouth, he was already asking you, "Would you maybe like to stay with me? I can help with your quirk too." He glanced away awkwardly. You looked towards him in disbelief.

"Dude, are you sure? We literally just met like 10 minutes ago? I mean, I'm all for it, I have nowhere else to turn to, but if you really really don't want me here, I will politely step out of your life." You so badly wanted to accept his offer on the spot, but being the considerate, mostly sensible human you were, you gave him the option to back out. Hawks shook his head.

"No, no, it's alright. You can crash here. Uh- I mean- stay here! Sorry!" You giggled at his comment.

"Well thank you very much!"

"It's all good. I have a spare bedroom you can occupy for the time being. I'll give you some clothes to sleep in that'll hopefully fit. Accidentally bought a couple things in the wrong size without looking. " (a/n: just...just assume its your size, or oversized, whatever's comfy idk) He jumped up and headed towards his room to grab you the clothes. You still sat on the floor. Still amazed at everything that was occurring.

Hawks walked back into the room and tossed you the clothes. "Hey uh, you know, you can get up now, sorry for holding you down earlier.."

You blushed and scrambled to stand up, "Oh no! It's ok! I understand. This would definitely warrant that kind of action. Some random stranger crashes into your apartment at like 1am. I completely understand. Honest."

He let out a small laugh and wearily brushed his fingers through his hair. The adrenaline of everything finally wearing off. He could feel the tiredness setting into his aching muscles again. “Ah, well, I’m going to head to bed now. The room is down the hall at the very end that you can stay in. I’ll take you out training tomorrow evening if that’s alright?”

You gave a nod of understanding and followed him down the hallway. “Goodnight Hawks,” you sang as he walked into his bedroom. He gave a hum of acknowledgment and closed his door. 

Making it into what was now your room, you changed out of your clothes so fast, eager to rid yourself of the past hours events. 

Not gonna lie, you could not figure out how to properly get your new wings into the shirt, even with the holes and snaps in the back. Your mind was too exhausted to even process this new skill. So you ended up going to bed without the shirt on and just settled for putting the sweatpants on. 

You figured it’d be good to just pass out asap. You were sure if you tried to recount the recent events, you’d spiral into a panicked mess. 

You shut your eyes tightly, willing yourself to sleep, trying to only think of positive outcomes for the future. But to be honest, you didn’t know enough about anything in this realm to think rationally about anything good. 

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I prooobably didn’t proofread this as much as I should have

[mysticpetals]

Farewell, sunshine

𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: Jake × f!mc (Syianne)

𝙂𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚: angst, a sprinkle of fluff

𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 4.9k (oof)

𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: All Jake ever wanted was to find his sister and protect the person who had helped him more than anyone. Only, he slowly began to realise that bringing Syianne into this had caused more harm than good.

𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: mentions of blood, physical attack, violence, hospitals, medical coma, panic attack.

𝙋𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙩𝙨: Anonymous asked: 5. “Wake up! Please wake up.” MC and Jake finally get to meet for the first time, but everything is heavily dipped in angst. 😂 Also I adore your writing and keep up the good work!

Anonymous asked: Can you give us the most angsty jealous filled over protective short with Jake x MC i want all the ANGST to be seeping out of my screen

@mnrangera asked: Here's a nice angsty scenario for you: MC is in Duskwood continuing their investigation but is caught out in town after dark. They are on the phone with Jake when they are attacked by the Man Without a Face like Jessie was.

𝙉𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙨: I know this has been LOOOOONG overdue and I apologise for the wait. Thank you to all my followers for being patient, especially those who sent the requests in. I hope the long wait is worth it and you enjoy it. Also, please read the warnings before proceeding, I don't want any of you to be triggered by something I wrote. There may be inaccuracies in how I progressed medical conditions and general working of the hospitals so I apologise for that. Please do not repost or translate this fic anywhere else!! I'm literally begging you, please don't ruin my hard work like this. I would love if I could get some sort of feedback, whether it be reblogs or comments or just anon asks. I've tried to improve my writing and I hope it shows a little in this. This is my Christmas and New Year present all wrapped in one! I hope you all have a great 2021 <3

It was a cold, winter evening with the sky painted in a plethora of warm colors and Jake felt like finally things were going his way.

He, along with Syianne, had been working tirelessly for the past few weeks to find out what happened to Hannah. They had faced a lot of challenges along the way, with cryptic diary entries and threats directed towards them and their loved ones, but still, they'd prevailed and spent every ounce of free time, getting more information about Hannah's perpetrator.

They finally had the facts about what happened the day she was kidnapped and only the identity of the criminal was hidden. Syianne had suggested that she should go to Duskwood to try and find the last puzzle piece, to which Jake had been a little apprehensive. She argued that the rest of the group had already been through enough, with getting stalked and receiving threats and insisted that she should be the one to carry out her search in secret.

She never once asked for him to come along because she knew how dangerous it would be for him and she didn't want him to get caught. Jake was instantly warmed by the thought that someone cared so much about him, to think of his well being first.

So that night, as she called him to update him on her findings and plan after she went to Duskwood, he found himself speaking his thoughts impulsively.

"What if I came too?"

There was silence on the other end and Jake thought he might have overstepped or made it weird but she answered before he could stammer an apology.

"I'd like that. But only if you're comfortable and safe."

She told him to ruminate on it for a while and bid him goodnight. Jake thought about whether it was a logical thing to do. If Syianne planned to go undercover, he couldn't very well let her go into the lion's den alone. So he made up his mind and texted Syianne to let her know.

Jake [10:46 pm]

I'll come to Duskwood too.

Is it okay if we don't meet straight away?

I...I don't think I'm ready yet.

Syianne [10:47 pm]

I was lowkey hoping you'd say that ahaha

And of course! Take as much time as you need :)

That night, he slept with a smile on his face, excitement churning in his stomach.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Syianne was looking forward to her trip to Duskwood.

She knew it was a potentially dangerous situation and she was only going there to investigate but knowing that Jake might be there too, sent a spark of thrill through her body. They had been speaking non-stop for the past few weeks and she really liked talking to him. His answers to questions about him or his life were adorably confusing and Syianne realized that she really wanted to get to know him, be his friend or possibly something more, if their flirty banter was anything to go by.

Her bag contained all the essentials she could need, along with a sketchbook and pencils to use in case of boredom. She couldn't leave Matrix with any of her friends as they were either busy or allergic to cats so her only option was to take her along.

She had never booked a flight so fast. Knowing she would have to take a car from the airport to the rest of the way to Duskwood did nothing to damper her excitement. She couldn't wait to meet everyone once they found Hannah, some more so than the others.

The trip was nothing eventful, just a lot of travelling and it made Syianne a little tired but the idea of meeting her friends and finally putting a stop to all this madness, made her keep going. She wouldn't admit it if you asked her but she was looking forward to possibly seeing Jake as well. She knew he might not be comfortable enough to meet her yet and she completely respected that, but the thought still lingered.

She checked in to the only hotel Duskwood had, not meeting the receptionist's - Lilly's - eyes and was eternally grateful that she had only leaked her number and not her photo in that video. It would have been much more difficult to move about Duskwood, if that were the case.

The room they had was pretty basic, but not too bad for a few nights. Matrix prowled around the room, getting herself comfortable in the new environment while Syianne slowly unpacked the few clothes and necessities she brought.

In the corner of her mind, there was the thought that Jake might be staying at this hotel too and that sent a shiver of excitement down her spine. But she was a woman of her word and would wait until Jake was ready and would not try to look for him.

She had a mission here and she wanted to be damn sure that that's what she would be focusing on and save Hannah.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Jake was supposed to be in Duskwood about two nights ago.

He had encountered some issues with removing his tracks from the internet, as well as trying to find a safe way to drive to Duskwood without exposing himself. Working as a hacker did have some benefits and finally he managed to find a guy who made him three fake number plates that he would interchange every once in a while, so his whereabouts couldn't be traced.

He had let Syianne know of the unexpected delay but to his surprise, she was enjoying herself in Duskwood. She had told him that Jessy gave her a virtual tour of the town once and she was excited to explore all those places in person. She talked to him at night, describing the beauty of the small town and Jake felt himself growing wistful, wondering what they could do together if he had been there. But then again, hadn't he said that he wouldn't show himself right now? He was cautious - just as he had been all his life - but something about Syianne just made him want to let his guard down, to just be selfish for once.

He had no time to think further on it because finally, all the preparations and precautionary measures were done and he could drive to Duskwood. He couldn't leave Glitch at home because he had attachment issues and couldn't go without Jake for a long period of time. So he ushered him into his carrier and told him he could claw all the wood he wanted when they reached their destination and Glitch meowed in agreement. He had always been a smart cat, after all.

Changing the number plates every hour was exhausting, especially when he didn't do much manual work but he endured it, if it meant he was one step closer to finding his sister.

When he finally reached Duskwood, he was in awe of how normal it looked, how silent; how someone who didn't know that a girl had been kidnapped would think of this place as the perfect getaway. But he knew better, didn't he? This town held dark secrets, secrets that people weren't willing to acknowledge and he was going to expose them for what they were, no matter what it took.

Signing into the Duskwood hotel was as awkward as he imagined it to be, his half sister having no idea who he was and looking at his dark, baggy clothes suspiciously. He wasn't blaming her, he would have probably done the same if a strange man came out of nowhere to stay in Duskwood of all places. Lilly gave him a tight smile as he picked up his bag and key and made way to his room.

Syianne had texted him earlier that day that she would be checking out the lake in the evening, where Jessy was attacked. Jake was against it from the start but he should have known how stubborn she could be and eventually, he had to agree but only on the condition that she stays on video call with him the whole time. Syianne was evidently bewildered by his request, judging by the way she kept writing and erasing her reply but after a while, she managed to ask if he would be comfortable with that. Jake's heart warmed at her considerate words, never really having anyone who would care about his emotions, he was always surprised when Syianne said something like that. He replied that he would just turn off his camera or point it at the lamp or something but he had to be sure about her safety.

And that's why, he was sitting with his phone in front of him in the evening, camera turned off as he watched her fondly, pointing out the strange birds she saw.

"Ah, I wish you were here! The lake is so pretty this time and the light from sunset is reflecting off the water and it makes an amazing view," she said, voice breathy with the exertion of walking for a while and a tone of awe towards the scene in front of her.

"That's sufficient sightseeing, don't you think?" Her voice suddenly took a serious note and Jake straightened up in his chair. He was afraid but couldn't say anything. He had already agreed to let her go with a condition and he feared if he asked her to not investigate, she would probably end the call and keep looking for clues by herself. At least on the phone, he could look at her surroundings and made sure no one sneaked up on her.

"If you say so," he said half-heartedly, glancing at the surroundings behind her as she narrowed her eyes at his dismissive tone.

The next twenty minutes were spent with Syianne looking around the lake and Jake looking over her shoulder virtually. She had scouted the edge and went a little deeper into the forest, looking for a car, a boat, a mask - anything, really - but the search had proved to be futile so far. Everything was as peaceful as ever, no signs of any disturbance and it made Jake a little antsy. Nothing was ever this perfect.

"Well, since we can't find anything here, I think you should come back. It's getting late," Jake said, looking at the already darkened sky. It was an ominous red color and Jake was getting more and more worried as people left the lakeside.

Syianne frowned but didn't argue and that made him sigh in relief.

"Yeah, you're right. No use trying to find something that isn't there," she said and started walking again.

"Wait, you walked here? Didn't you bring your car?" Jake asked and she shook her head.

"Nope, I wanted to enjoy Duskwood and being in a car wouldn't have helped," she smiled at the camera and Jake let out an almost inaudible sigh. Why couldn't she care about her safety a little more? She was going to give him grey hair before he reached his thirties, that was for sure.

As he began to reply to her, he caught movement from the left side of the screen and instantly grabbed his phone, expanding the background.

There was a silhouette of a hand.

"Syianne, run!" He shouted, as the figure's arm came into view and she looked back in surprise before starting to sprint, the camera shaking from her movements.

Jake scrambled to get his car keys, not bothering with what he was wearing and ran towards the hotel parking, getting into his car and connecting the GPS to his phone, all the while listening to Syianne's panting breaths as she ran away from the man without a face.

Getting her location was no problem for him and he just hoped he would arrive there on time.

"Jake, I'm scared. I'm hiding behind a big building and I think he went on ahead," she whispered, voice shaky and trembling and Jake's hands gripped the steering wheel tightly as he glanced over at his phone to watch her looking around herself in a panic.

Five more minutes and he would reach her location. Jake had never been more thankful that Duskwood was a small town and the hotel wasn't so far away from the lake.

"I'm coming, Syianne. Just a little while more and we'll go back together."

"Okay, I think I'm safe for now," she said. There was a sound of slow careful footsteps as Syianne came out from behind the building.

The abrupt sound of a gasp almost made him lose control of the steering wheel and he increased his speed as he heard what sounded like a scuffle. Syianne had probably dropped her phone because it only showed the dark sky and sounds of her struggling against her attacker.

"No! Let–"

Jake let out a harsh breath, jaw tightening as he heard Syianne's scream. He drove straight for a bit and turned the next corner and saw the man trying once again to restrain her. His eyes saw red and he honked and honked like it was nobody's business, speeding towards them.

The man without a face seemed to have realised that someone was coming to help as he pushed Syianne roughly into the wall and ran away towards the forest. As much as Jake wanted to go after him, Syianne was his first priority and he quickly got out of the car, dashing towards her crumpled form, lying on the ground.

He fumbled with his phone, calling the local police and asking for an ambulance, his body shaking all the while, as he knelt down next to Syianne.

He felt tears welling in her eyes as he looked at her battered form and realised that she was bleeding.

"Syianne?" He spoke in a scared voice.

"Syianne!" He said more forcefully, repeatedly patting her face in hope she'll look at him but her eyes were still glassy and unfocused as if she couldn't comprehend anything.

"I'm...so sorry. I…" her voice trailed off as she struggled to breathe and Jake cried, seeing her in so much pain, when he couldn't do anything except wait for the ambulance to arrive.

After a moment, Syianne's eyes fluttered closed and Jake's panic rose to new heights.

"No, no, no! Wake up! Please wake up!" He shouted and begged but she didn't respond to his calls.

His hand was soaked in her blood from where he was applying pressure on the wound at her side. The blood hadn't stopped flowing and Jake was worried that she was losing too much, too soon.

"What do I do? What do I do?" He muttered to himself, adrenaline coursing through his veins, with only one thought in his head – to save her.

He heard sirens in the distance and was relieved to know that help was coming. He pushed up the fallen hood of his jacket up on his head and looked at Syianne for any signs of consciousness. Her breaths were shallow and eyes still closed.

Soon enough, paramedics rushed to the scene and immediately started tending to Syianne's wounds. Jake felt as if he was just a spectator, not being able to do anything but watch. Someone came up to him and started asking him questions, about how he found her, who he was to her and if he knew anything about the attack. He answered all the questions as carefully as he could, giving a fake name, because he still wasn't sure if the police department was in league with the kidnapper or not.

As soon as he was done with the questioning, a paramedic approached him, letting him know that they were taking Syianne to the hospital and he would have to come there for a bit of paperwork. Jake hesitated and said he'd drive there in his own car and the paramedic nodded in response and left.

He got in his car and put his head in his hands, shaking at the unfortunate turn of events. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. Syianne was just going to check out the lake and then surprise her friends the next day by telling them she'd be here for a few days and enjoy Duskwood together.

Jake was even thinking of meeting her in person and telling her that she had changed his life for the better. But his cowardice, his meticulous nature to not let anyone know who he was or where he was might have cost Syianne her life tonight. Even thinking about it had tears pooling in his eyes and he took a deep breath to bite back the sobs that were threatening to break once again.

He felt guilty, so so guilty and couldn't bring himself to start the car. He was pretty sure that if – no when – Syianne woke up, she would want nothing to do with the man who put her life in danger. With that thought rooted in his mind, he opened his phone and with trembling hands, sent Jessy a text about Syianne's accident. He received a reply almost immediately.

Jessy [8:46 pm]

What?

How did she come here?

You know what? If she's not okay, I'm going to hunt you down and make you pay.

Jake had no trouble believing she was telling the truth. All he wanted to do was help and now everything was falling apart. Taking a deep but shaky breath, he started the car but instead of going to the hospital, he turned towards the hotel.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Jessy had no trouble believing that the hacker was telling the truth. His texts were frantic and he practically begged her to go to the hospital to see Syianne. She had no idea how she got here, but hearing that she got attacked, just like she was, was enough to make her worry and drive to the hospital, after letting Cleo know. She figured that the rest of them deserved to know too.

She rushed to the front desk, breathless and worried, and one of the nurses told Jessy that the doctors were with Syianne and she'd have to wait until they were done to know how she was.

After some time of relentless pacing, Cleo arrived and Jessy filled her in on everything that the hacker told her, which wasn't much, but it gave them a good idea of what had happened. Cleo said that she hadn't told anyone else yet and that they should do so as soon as the doctors had an update on Syianne's condition.

About an hour later, a nurse came upto Jessy and Cleo, asking if they knew Syianne and upon their confirmation, led them to the room she was kept in. They weren't allowed to enter yet as the doctors were still in the room, but Jessy gasped when she saw Syianne's scratched up face, with bandages covering her head.

"Oh my gosh." Cleo breathed and Jessy felt a rush of sorrow as she averted her eyes.

The doctors after completing their examination, told them that Syianne was stabbed in the side but luckily it didn't puncture anything important and they closed up the wound to allow it to heal. What was more concerning, was the fact that she was hit on the back of her head.

"She most likely suffered from a concussion, in which case, it is of the utmost importance that the patient doesn't fall asleep," the doctor said and Jessy and Cleo looked at each other uneasily.

"But Syianne fell asleep…" Jessy began and the doctor gave her an apologetic smile.

"That's right. She was unconscious when she was brought here. The superficial wounds are taken care of, we just don't know when she'll wake up."

Both of them were too stunned to say anything and a call for the doctor from one of the nurses broke them out of their stupor.

"So, she's in a coma?" Cleo asked.

The doctor hesitated before answering.

"Essentially, yes. But we can't know for sure without further observation. If the injury isn't severe she'll wake up soon, we just have to monitor her constantly and look for any changes." He then walked off when his pager went off, most likely to see another patient.

"Don't worry, Jessy. She'll wake up soon," Cleo said, placing a hand on her shoulder, as they looked into Syianne's room, seeing her sleeping peacefully, as if nothing was wrong and she was just taking a nap.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

As soon as she got home from the hospital, Jessy sent out a row of furious texts to the hacker, clouded by her anger and hopelessness. In her head, it was all his fault that Syianne was twittering between life and death. He was the one who asked her to come to Duskwood without letting any of them know, which caused her to be in such a terrible condition.

Everything was crumbling.

They were a tight knit group, always there for each other but when did it turn into a nightmare, Jessy didn't know. Emotion overtook her and she suddenly collapsed against the wall, keeping a hand on her mouth to muffle her sobs, and cried.

She cried for Hannah, who she had no idea whether she was alive or not. She cried for Syianne, who had become such a great friend to her. Most importantly, she cried for her relationship with everyone, that was slowly but surely, withering away.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Jake had been pacing in his hotel room ever since getting back, waiting on a word from Jessy. Glitch watched him with big eyes, as he stubbed his on the bedside and cursed. Sighing in defeat, Jake realised that it won't do any good to worry himself to death, but that didn't mean that his mind didn't drift off to the earlier scene.

Syianne lying on the ground. Blood pooled around her.

He shook his head in frustration, trying to get that image out of his head but to no success. Glitch, sensing that something was wrong, strolled towards him, rubbing and purring against his legs. Jake softened at seeing his efforts to calm him and he picked Glitch up, moving to lay down on the bed. He petted him, smiling at the way the cat burrowed himself further against Jake, curling his tail around his wrist.

After a few peaceful moments of cuddling, Jake's phone lit up with a text, which had him scrambling to grab it from the bedside. Glitch meowed in protest but Jake was too wound up to notice.

Jessy [10:25 pm]

She's in a coma

They don't know when she'll wake up

Jake felt all breath leave him as he read Jessy's text. He didn't know what to think, what to do, what he could do. Jessy didn't give him a chance to respond.

Jessy [10:26 pm]

Don't contact any of us ever again

I don't want to find Hannah this way…which leads to everyone else getting hurt

Please leave Syianne out of this

Saying her mind, Jessy went offline again. Jake took a shaky breath, trying to ground himself. Syianne might never make up.

No, he told himself.

He couldn't think like that. He knew she'd wake up, it might take a little time but she will. Because if she didn't, Jake wouldn't be able to live with himself.

He got another text from Lilly, saying she was sorry that it happened but he couldn't bring himself to write back. His mind was empty, body numb to everything around him and he was cursing himself for being so careless.

If he hadn't been so selfish, if only he didn't put all of this on her, if he had just reached on time, if, if, if.

That's all he thought of, as tears continuously trailed down his cheeks, an arm covering his eyes, the only thing on his mind being Syianne, just as it had been ever since he started talking to her.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

The next day, Jake found himself holding a large flower bouquet and walking to Duskwood hospital's reception. He was trembling, scared out of his mind but he just had to see Syianne. So, he had braved his anxiety and was now standing in front of the receptionist, who looked at the abnormally large bouquet in his hands and raised an eyebrow. He cleared his throat.

"I'm here to see Syianne King, she was admitted here yesterday."

The receptionist's gaze sharpened as she looked him over and he partially hid behind the flowers.

"Only family members are allowed to visit," she spoke slowly and Jake bit his lip in frustration.

"I'm her fiance," he said and before the surprised receptionist could say anything, he continued, "I drove here as soon as I got the call but they wouldn't tell me what happened. Only that Syianne had been in an accident and I needed to get here as soon as I could and I—" he cut himself off, shuffling nervously and wiping away the tears that had managed to escape from his eyes.

The receptionist softened, seeing his genuine sorrow and care for his fiance and warmed her voice.

"Of course, I'm sorry for what happened. She's in room 309, third floor. The elevator is down the hall," she pointed and Jake thanked her profusely before walking ahead.

Him being Syianne's fiance might have been fake but everything he had felt was the truth and he felt overwhelmed now that he was here. Should he see her? Did he even deserve to see her after he put her in danger? Thoughts like this plagued his mind all the way to Syianne's room and they only stopped when he saw '309' written in bold letters on a grey coloured door.

His breath stuttered in his chest. He was second guessing his presence in the hospital, thinking whether he shouldn't have come. He stood in front of the door for about ten minutes, contemplating but when the nurses started giving him suspicious looks, he swallowed thickly and with shaky hands, opened the door.

Nothing could have prepared him for the utter despair and helplessness he felt, as he saw Syianne's motionless form on the bed, breathing as if she was just sleeping and would wake up any minute. But he knew that wasn't the truth.

She was here and it was his fault.

For the longest time, he just sat on a chair beside her bed and just looked at her. His eyes traced every injury, every bruise that was visible and he felt sick, blaming himself for letting it happen. She was still sleeping and suddenly, it just got too much.

There was too much light, too much beeping, the walls were too white, the flowers in his hands digging into his skin and he got up hastily, dropping the bouquet and backed into the furthest corner of the room.

His breath was coming in short bursts, it hurt to breath, to think, to stay upright—!

His legs gave from under him and he slid down, back against the wall, shaking hands coming up to wipe the wetness on his face.

He didn't even realise he had been crying.

His vision was a blur of dark shapes and in a distinct corner of his head that was still sane, he thought of what Syianne would have done had she been awake. He was sure she would kneel down in front of him and take his hands, running her thumbs against the back of his hands to calm him.

'Breathe slowly, Jake. Deep breaths with me, come on,' he heard her in his head and tried to slow down, breathing harshly at first but after a few minutes, his vision cleared and his breathing stabled to an acceptable rate.

His whole body shook with the sheer suddenness of the panic attack and he slowly tried to get up, holding onto the wall as a support as his gaze, once again, landed on the bed and it's occupant.

All at once, his head cleared and he knew what to do.

Snatching a sheet of paper from the notepad lying near her chart, Jake penned his thoughts, all his anguish, and his apologies on it. Not once did his hand shake as he wrote the note and not once did his mind waver from the decision he had made. At last, when he had said everything he wanted to, he put the pen down and glanced at Syianne's peaceful face.

His throat closed up but he swallowed once to make sure he didn't cry. No, Jake had no time for tears. It was his fault that this happened in the first place, so it was his responsibility that he would make it right.

He didn't know when she would wake but whenever it might be, Jake had everything he wanted to say, already written for her.

He bent down towards her and placed the softest of kisses against her forehead, knowing that it would be the only time he would ever get to do it.

She did not open her eyes and Jake stepped back with a miniscule tilt of his lips.

Yes, he would make everything right.

[rosemary-is-in-pesterquest]

ooh! I have thoughts on Eridan!

okay so, to me, Eridan ties into this thing that homestuck has going on with a lot of its more morally grey characters... the question of how responsible young people are for their negative qualities and actions, and where the age threshold for personal responsibility is.

the characters in homestuck all straddle this line between being young enough to consider them victims of the forces that influence them, while also old enough to understand what they're doing and how it affects others... especially because a lot of these kids come off as really smart for their age, and very precocious. we've all been through phases in our lives that make us cringe, not because we're ashamed of something harmless, but because we recognize that we had absorbed something harmful, and took longer than we wish we had to unlearn it. it could be as simple as being kind of a jerk in a misguided attempt to seem cool, or as dramatic as actually hurting someone in an attempt to remedy one's own insecurities by putting down others to seem better by comparison... but how far can you push that before people aren't willing to forgive? before people abandon the notion that better guidance and more appropriate role models could reform someone? and it's especially interesting when you consider how old homestuck's core audience might've been when they first encountered this story, and how it affected their perception of the characters if they saw them as peers, rather than as children from an adult's perspective.

so to talk about Eridan, I wanna frame this in terms of his classpect, because it actually goes a long way towards contextualizing his behavior. Eridan is a prince of hope, meaning that he destroys hope or uses hope to destroy... and this can be seen in practically every conversation he has. if Eridan is contacting someone, it is because he expects something of them. advice, or consolation, or a solution to a problem he's having... it's always something. when he contacts Kanaya, he wants her to auspistize between him and Vriska. when he contacts Feferi, he wants her to give him encouragement, and maybe date him when he asks. and in every case, the way he demands these things by being rude, whiny, or self pitying, makes people reluctant or unwilling to give him what he expects. he destroys what he hopes to obtain.

it goes deeper than that though. Eridan has absorbed this ideology of sea dweller superiority from living on Alternia... and he actually takes it way farther than it even makes sense to. the aristocracy on Alternia use the lower class for all sorts of menial work that they feel entitled not to have to do themselves. they might have the ability to freely cull individual low bloods for any reason, but eradicating all land dwelling trolls would leave a lot of unpleasant yet necessary tasks with no one to do them. I don't think Eridan actually wants to live in a reality where sea dwellers have to pick up the slack of doing things like sanitation work, or construction or something... but another concept that is heavily tied to the hope aspect is delusion. Eridan is exaggerating. he's trying to agree with Alternia's ruthless class structure so hard that it's actually kind of absurd. but Feferi calls him on that... she says she thinks that he self sabotages on purpose. because he knows, at least in some capacity, that the consequences of getting what he "wants" would actually be really uncomfortable to live with.

so not only is Eridan's goal to destroy... it is also a false goal that he constantly undermines. and all of his waffling between grandstanding and self pity destroys his romantic prospects, which are what he actually seems to want the most.

if you look at the way Eridan pursues relationships, he actually makes a lot of logical sense, but not a lot of emotional sense. he's idealized the act of perfectly filling the relationship requirements of each quadrant. he wants Feferi to be his matesprit, which is purely based on the fact that she's high enough on the hemospectrum to be an appropriate match in terms of status. he wants Vriska to be his kismesis, and Kanaya to be their auspistice, and there are hints that Karkat might've been someone he was considering for moiraillegience, though it wasn't emphasized as much. and there you go! his goal is specific, but it's based more on ideals than on the actual needs and feelings of the people involved, and it's totally self centered... he always wants them to cater to his own needs. the reason why he gets as nihilistic as he does on the meteor, is because all of his endeavors to achieve these relationships are falling through. he feels like he has no hope of mending his existing connections, because he still only sees them in terms of people either giving him, or not giving him, what he wants. but the rest of their race is dead. as the last twelve trolls in existence, they only have each other as romantic options. and as Eridan gets more and more desperate, he gets more and more demanding, which is the exact quality that drives everyone away from him to begin with, and it culminates in him having a "if I can't have what I want then nobody can have any of their hopes either" meltdown.

to backtrack a bit, I wanna reconsider questions such as, when is a kid old enough to be held responsible for their own negative qualities? like... when are you comfortable with ceasing to blame environmental factors? when are they just a bad person? is it after they've refused a certain number of chances to make better choices? when do they reach an age, or level of bad behavior, that makes you think they can't be helped to reform from these negative qualities? where does an adult lose their patience for the idea that a kid is just a victim of their upbringing?

obviously Feferi is Eridan's peer, but these are basically the questions she grapples with when she talks to Eridan. it's like growing up next door to a kid whose parents have some aggressively wrong-headed political stances. as you grow, that kid might mirror their parents' way of thinking... and by the time the two of you are in your teens, it's hard to ignore how much of a jerk that kid is becoming. but you've seen them at every step of their development. you know where it comes from. maybe theirs is the dominant political belief in the community, even if your own parents aren't like that. maybe you wonder if you would've agreed with them if you grew up under their circumstances. you've felt the pressure, but you haven't lived in it like they have, and maybe if they just had the chance to grow up under different conditions, they wouldn't be this way. and you are aware that you could be an influence on them... maybe they need you to help them see another perspective. you always got along so well as kids. when did things even change? and that's kind of where I imagine Feferi is at when we're introduced to her and Eridan. it's a crossroads between believing that you might still matter enough to them to change their outlook, and the persistence of their ingrained beliefs. it's tiring to do that kind of work, over a long period of time, to minimal results. when is the appropriate time to give up? in this way, Feferi's own hopes for Eridan fade over time. she says at one point that she was mainly acting as his moirail so he wouldn't try to underfeed her lusus and kill the land dwellers that way. she's not sure how serious he is, and she can't take that risk. deep down, I'm pretty sure Eridan knew he was never actually going to commit a genocide... but his need to grandstand, and legitimate belief in his caste superiority, had convinced Feferi enough that she still felt obligated to manage him as though he was a real threat.

these characters are thirteen years old. they're right at the edge of childhood and adolescence... right at the age where children aren't quite so innocent. they want to assert themselves. they aren't mature, so there's a lot of responsibility that they still shouldn't be trusted with yet, but they've become aware enough to feel like that's demeaning, and to want to be taken seriously. in an effort to make people acknowledge them without looking down on them, they'll try just about anything. they don't have the experience to know what they're doing yet, so it doesn't always work in their favor, and that's frustrating. you can see bits and pieces of this in homestuck's characters. like with the way they try to paint themselves as an authority on something, or shit talk each other in order to emphasize their own strengths. it's a really interesting theme, because homestuck pushes some of these young characters really far in terms of how bad the things they've done can be, or how much their lived experiences have taught them that what they're doing is acceptable. they can be really self aware in some ways, and come off as really childish in others. it's hard to know what you'd do about them in real life... and your answer changes depending on your own age and perspective. it's a really cool gray area to poke around in, and homestuck is excellent at it.

wtf I like Eridan now

[lover-of-skellies]

Door 3

You swallowed back your feelings of uncertainty, carefully approaching the door that had gained your attention. You knocked, then waited for a response, only to receive none. As bad as you felt for invading the riders' privacy like this, your curiosity propelled you forward anyway, and soon enough, you found your hand grasping the knob. Giving a gentle twist and nudging the door open just enough to peek inside, you called out, announcing your presence and asking for permission to come in. Once again though, there was none.

Your shoulders sank a bit in defeat and you furrowed your brows; you'd come all this way, your curiosity and determination to get to know each of the riders driving you. Chewing on your bottom lip, you silently contemplated your options for a moment, deciding against simply walking away. You were going to enter anyway, and you were going to look around. As long as you weren't digging through the dresser or rifling through papers, you'd be forgiven... right?

[You selected: Door 3]

Now entering: Pestilence's room

~~~

Carefully pushing the door open and inviting yourself inside, you paused to flick on the overhead light before nudging the door shut behind yourself again. Glancing around the room, you arched a brow, taking in your new surroundings; the bed, as you'd been expecting, wasn't made. The sheets and blankets were pushed down toward the end of the bed and bunched up, and the small stack of pillows even laid carelessly strewn about.

Approaching the bed, your eyes settled on a small picture frame that occupied the bedside table. Delicately picking the item up, you furrowed your brows and frowned; in the photo was a set of brothers. One was tall and lanky, sporting a brilliant crimson scarf and a bright smile, while the other was short and appeared to be a bit rounder. He was clad in a pair of untied tennis shoes, basketball shorts, and a baggy hoodie, all worn beneath a long, oversized lab coat. A pair of large and thin glasses with circular frames were taped onto his skull and his grin was more lazy, almost making him appear tired.

The top drawer of his bedside table was open the smallest bit, and gripped by curiosity, you set down the picture of the brothers in favor of tugging open the drawer. Neatly folded and tucked inside was a bundle of red fabric, which was nearly identical to the shade of the taller brother's scarf that you'd seen in the photo. Reaching out, you gently traced your fingers over it, taking in how soft it felt. As you pulled your hand away, however, you became aware of the dust that now clung to your skin. Knowing the significance of dust, your eyes widened and you hurriedly pushed the drawer shut, attempting to brush the dust off of your hand.

Feeling satisfied after a moment and taking a few seconds to calm yourself, you let out a deep breath, glancing around the room again. Clothes had been scattered across his floor, and you were unsure if they were supposed to be clean or dirty. Not wanting to touch the potentially dirty clothes, you stepped around them, crossing the room to look at some books that lined a shelf.

The books were sparse and some laid on their sides, but from the looks of it, they were mostly joke books, books on a variety of science stuff, and books filled with puzzles and word games. You didn't take Pestilence as the type who liked reading, so finding a collection of books in his room was a bit of a surprise.

On the floor next to the bookshelf was a chest, and you tilted your head, squatting and leaning closer to get a better look at it. There was a series of locks lining the front, meaning you wouldn't be able to see what it contained. Damnit. The curiosity would eat you alive, and you already knew it.

Standing again, you approached the rider's desk. A small lamp occupied the corner, and a decent amount of papers, pencils, and pens laid scattered across the surface. A ruler and eraser also laid atop the desk, over top the corners of what looked like a blueprint for some sort of device. Your eyebrows became knit in confusion; just what was the device? What was it supposed to do?

On an attached shelf was a thick, heavy looking book. Humming softly, you gingerly lifted it, lying it on the desk and flipping to a random page, finding numerous pictures filling plastic sleeves. The first one to catch your attention was of a skeleton in thick, bulky sunglasses. He wore a large, goofy grin, showing off a single gold tooth while his arm was around the shoulders of a rather... irritated water elemental. On the next page was a photo of a purple clad skeleton with heart shaped eye lights, his arms around another skeleton who was covered in errors and glitches, a scowl fixed on his face. You flipped several pages ahead, stopping as a picture of a pair of humans appeared.

There was a girl with medium length, bright blue hair. Her wide grey eyes were lined with dark makeup and her rather pale face was flushed pink as a boy standing beside her pressed a kiss to her cheek. The boy had a tanned complexion, his face also flushed. A pair of large, square glasses rested on the bridge of his nose, and his eyes were squeezed tightly shut, messy dark hair curling in every direction atop his head. They were cute together, but you weren't sure you knew who they were.

A rat scurried past you and squeaked, and you jumped, your entire body jolting in surprise. Processing that it was only a rat, you let out a deep sigh, trying to calm your racing your. It was just a rat. Nothing to be worried about. It's not like Pest was back already-

From behind you, someone cleared their throat, and you mentally cursed at yourself. Slowly withdrawing your hand from the photo album, you reluctantly turned to face its owner, who stared at you with a raised brow bone and a hand on his hip. He tilted his head, his tone completely even and calm, "So. Is there any particular reason why you're in my room, going through my old pictures?"

You began attempting to explain what was going on, telling the skeleton that you'd come here because you were curious about him and only wanted to learn about him more. That you'd come such a long way and didn't think you could simply leave when you found the room empty.

His gaze was locked on you as he slowly nodded, processing what he'd been told, "So let me get this straight... You let yourself in and started rifling through my stuff, because you wanted to get to know me better?" Fully aware of how bad that sounded, you made a sound of confirmation, practically radiating guilt as you admitted that you should've just gone away and come back some other time. He hummed in agreement, "Yeah, you should've. It's awfully rude of you to go invading people's privacy like this. Makes me almost kinda wanna go to your house and go through everything in your room, just so you can see how uncool it is."

You hung your head in shame, silent for a moment before you all but hurled yourself in his direction, wrapping your arms around him. Pulling him into a tight hug, you began to apologize profusely, and working past his momentary shock, he sighed, awkwardly returning the hug and patting your back, "Hey, hey, dude, cut it out. I don't appreciate the invasion of privacy, but I'm not gonna strike you dead or anything. Just... this is a warning, I guess. All I ask is that you don't do this again."

You agreed not to let yourself into his room again without permission and he pulled away from the hug, reaching up into his other sleeve to dig into a pouch, withdrawing a vial of the antidote to his touch. He offered it to you and you eagerly accepted it, quickly uncapping the vial and gulping down the bittersweet contents. Returning the empty vial, you thanked him, and then turned to begin walking toward the door.

You briefly paused, your hand curling around the knob as you turned to glance at him, saying your goodbyes. Having already removed his sash and belt, he tugged his hoodie off, a bulky, beaded necklace around his neck. In its design, you wondered if the necklace was made by a child. Pestilence made a soft sound of acknowledgement, returning the goodbyes.

Tugging the door open and exiting the room, you gently shut the door behind yourself. You hadn't expected him to show up so suddenly, and when he had, you thought he would've infected you on the spot as punishment of some sort. The fact that he kept his distance and then even gave you an antidote was mildly surprising, and you made a mental note to thank him again later.

[deviant3lover]

OOOOOOOO! You writing for other charaters now? Cuz, here are some bois I'd like to see your take on! Pick and choose who you'd please: Zombieman, Child Emperor, Tatsumkai, Sonic, Flashy Flash, Mumen Rider, King and, (one I'd really like to see) Sweet Mask. Thanks, and happy early birthday!

Thank you~! And lmao, my birthday was like, a month ago now;; I swear my attention span is hella weak- I see a shiny thing and I 

Z I P 

Outta my work and go over to look at it for the next 3 days.

And anon… dear anon…

I will do ALL OF THEM.

MUMEN RIDER:

If I’m being honest? I honestly hated him when he was first introduced.

He cycled as fast as he could to confront the Paradisers, had a moment where he parked his bike, (a bit awkward, but I faintly enjoyed the sight) pulled off a show of confidence that implied that he knew the gravity of the situation and has a way of dealing with it effectively (the common subversive tactic: weak looking character has tremendous strength) and then got DECKED ON with one hit, showing that it was just shallow hot air he couldn’t back up.

And then he got credit for the work that Saitama did. (Albeit unintentionally.)

Not… the greatest first impression. I thought he was an overconfident guy who was playing hero, uncomprehending of the danger that he puts himself in for the sake of living in an idealised fantasy that since he’s the protagonist, since he’s the one with determination and a heart of gold, it’ll all work out. Him cycling towards the Sea King at full throttle, with him apparently not taking the hint from the Paradisers, drove that belief home to me even more.

(Wow, I sound like Garou here. :o…)

And then he launched into his spiel.

How he felt like he wasn’t good enough to take the promotion, how he knows, better than anyone, that he’s weak. That yes, he might not win- might even get killed for his fruitless efforts for it, but what matters is that he tries. Not because he feels like he can pull it off eventually, or that the monsters will submit to how ~brave~ he is, but because it’s just important to try in the face of overwhelming odds, if it means that others have a slightly better chance of surviving because of it. Willing to die just so others won’t, even when you’re dismissed as a weakling both in the present and after death.

And that made me doubt about what I thought of him.

It wasn’t until I saw him trying to convince TTM to leave Garou alone, trying to intervene when Garou attacked him, and getting his face smashed repeatedly into the concrete sidewalk for his efforts by the same man he tried to defend, that I was utterly convinced that Mumen was genuinely heroic.

This may be a little dark, but I have a feeling that Mumen’s sense of justice doesn’t entirely stem from his selfless nature, but also from feelings of worthlessness. That he goes above and beyond to be a hardworking hero because he feels he has no worth if he dares do otherwise. The Christmas extra chapter in the manga sort of sparked this belief for me. If Mumen’s sense of justice was purely selfless, he’d mention other options (e.g. Friends inviting him out, new bistro downtown, setting up a mini Christmas tree and treating himself to a nice present) and maybe consider injecting some time for himself for them, if not on Christmas day, then the day before or after. Instead, he says with a smile, that he’ll be patrolling the streets for danger with no allusion to his personal life. And that lingering suspicion still sticks to me to this day.

CHILD EMPEROR:

First impression? I didn’t think too much of him, because I didn’t have much reason to. Very little screen time in the early manga/anime didn’t get me to form much of an attachment or investment in his character.

But later on? I like him! A kid prodigy, but it’s made clear time and time again that he still has room to improve, and I’ve always been a big fan of personal growth and developing self-reflection/awareness in stories. The fact that he wasn’t a stuck-up brat who thought he knew everything, and (taking into account that he’s literally 10 years old) still had a great deal of growth ahead of him in terms of the technological and the personal…

Yeah. I’m definitely holding out my hope for seeing a side story dedicated to him.

If I had the luck to choose the idea for the plot, I would love to see what sparked his love for technology, his mishaps and successes and so-so’s when it came to developing his skills and his gadgets. I want to be able to see the people around him reacting with awe and confusion over this kid hurriedly drawing up complex diagrams on a chalkboard board for different ideas before they leave his mind, which gadgets he’s put the most work in, the most time on, and is proud of, and finally; if he had a snobby phase and is ashamed of it. Bonus points if he took a break from his work to read up on how to be more like a mature adult so that older people will take him more seriously outside of being an inventor.

SONIC:

I, uh… honestly don’t think too much of him? He never really stuck with me.

Conversely… I do, however, like the few times we get the spotlight shined on him. He’s a badass to watch, and I laughed and cringed when the infamous ‘accidental punch’ scene came up on my screen. Considering the fact that I watched the anime first before the manga, I wasn’t anticipating it at all.

Which makes me glad in this case! The animated scene feels way more impactful and memorable than the manga version. I felt the build up and the rapidly increasing dread rise in me as I saw Saitama’s fist slowly punch Sonic’s unmentionables. Animating the- ahem- impact of his punch done me in and seared that scene into my mind.

Hmm… I feel like Sonic’s a more rebellious version of Flash, whilst also having been influenced by him. The both of them enjoy taking care of themselves in more luxurious ways, with their glossy hair and refusal to be filthy or rough in any way (e.g. Flash taking good care of his hair in the shower, Sonic opting to cook the monster cells and serve them tastefully before eating them) but I feel like Sonic likes rebelling more outwardly towards how he’s been trained and conditioned as a ninja compared to Flash. He just gives off that vibe~

Expanding on that, I feel like he’s more self-reflective and subtle in his thoughts. Flash is sort of absorbed in his own business and narrow range of experiences (not that I’m blaming him: he’s a busy man) while Sonic is more rooted to reality, and is a little more mellowed out to show for it. In the audio CDs, he gains a new understanding of what Saitama is forced to go through and respects him more as a person than just a milestone to beat, and he overcomes his trauma of Saitama ‘punching him’ by accepting what happened and simply keeping the possibility of it happening again in mind; not to torture himself or blame himself for being ‘weak,’ but to acknowledge what he’s fearful of and accepting it, allowing him to move on.

FLASHY FLASH:

I was gunning hard for him to be a cold-blooded woman assassin who wants to look elegant and deadly at the same time. Femme fatale, minus the seduction.

I was a little disappointed when he turned out to be a guy, and more so when he riled up Metal Bat with his insults while telling them to cut it out (counter intuitive, but it wouldn’t have been so bad if I wanted to see that. But I didn’t want to see it so lmao-) so, apart from his cool character design, I was a little turned off in my investment in him.

I was hoping that they kept the name ‘Lightspeed Flash’ instead of Flashy Flash. Yes, I know that they’re pretty much the same in terms of meaning, but the former just sounds more dignified. Considering he’s a man who takes himself seriously in both his work and appearance, I feel like it’s more in character for him to suggest a hero name that sounds more impressive, but still shows that sort of silliness underneath when you look closely.

He gained back some of my respect for him when he directly told Tatsumaki off for stealing his kill and talking down on him. That takes mad guts and I was wondering which of the heroes are willing to risk a serious fight with her to prove that they’re not one to be trifled with.

(Metal Bat was a little different in that regard: at the time, I just saw him as another affectionate parody of the delinquent trope. Nice contrast to the rest of the older, calmer heroes, but a little generic.)

Flashy Flash… yeah. I feel like he’s willfully disconnected himself from the world both emotionally and socially. Not because he’s afraid, but because he thinks it’s useless. He’s already seen the worst of it thanks to his upbringing, so there’s no point in putting in effort to go out and explore just to discover what else is wrong with the world.

I also think that, like Tatsumaki, he feels more than competent on his own and believes doesn’t need any outside help or interference. Hence, anyone who doesn’t meet his personal standards immediately has their opinions and suggestions of him dismissed or not truly considered with respect. He thinks he knows what’s best, even when there’s opinions screaming that he’s not, because he doesn’t respect others that way.

KING:

OOF- Okay, I was actually pretty ambivalent about him.

I thought he was cool when he intimidated the Tongue monster into submission, then thought he was an egotistical, vain hero when confronted by the G4 monster, then thought he was a pitiful, cowardly man forced to flee out of necessity, and then thought he was an endearing puppy when he realized just who Saitama is to him.

And. Hm.

King is… a very genuine man. I like him. Like Mumen Rider, he’s willing to put himself on the line to protect others. What makes me a little conflicted is if he’s more, the same, or less heroic than Mumen.

More: He has absolutely nothing to defend himself with in terms of physical skills or strength. His luck is his only maxed out stat in the hero game he’s obliged to play, and he’d rather be left alone, but he still puts his life on the line to help others, even when he’s scared witless.

Less: He does have his awe inspiring, fear inducing reputation that can neutralise the monster threats more often than not, and is aware of this, using it to his advantage. So maybe he’s a little less courageous since he knows it will work in his favour more often than not.

My take on him…  King strikes me as a good man. In a normal, monsterless world, he won’t be the kind who’ll fearlessly charge into battle against terrorists, or pull off any awe inspiring feats by himself by passing life saving legislations; this man isn’t interested in grand scale heroics and would rather support those who are interested and are good at it.

No, King strikes me as a man who wants to keep to himself and offer his sincere help to those who manages to become good friends with this shy man. He may be quaking in his boots at imminent danger, but he’ll still try to stand up for what’s right when someone else is being taken advantage of, even if he’s not entirely sure of what he’s doing.

AMAI MASK:

(RECENT WEBCOMIC SPOILERS!!)

I never cared much for Amai until now.

I can’t imagine anything more devastating than working yourself down to the bone to protect and give people hope, to cultivate others into what it means to be a true hero, only to realize the people you worked so hard for was just as hideous as you used to be. This man worked so hard, and him protecting the people he cared about wasn’t enough to deter them from reacting with horror and disgust. It wasn’t even five minutes until the first of his ungrateful ‘fans’ tried stoning him.

Thank God Saitama intervened… the look on his face after he was called a cool guy was both ugly cute and heart wrenching. He may have been called dreamy or inspirational by the adoring masses, but being broken down to the very thing that you’ve been ashamed and fearful of your entire life, and still having someone who sees you as someone worthwhile must’ve meant the world to Amai. He’s a monster, yes, but he kept a vice grip on his morals and never let them go, even when his grip on them was weakening with every breath he took.

I also liked the way that ONE written his rise to fame. The build-up and anticipation surrounding how he looked behind the mask, Amai himself being bitter over the vanity of the public, learning to accept it, and gradually became obsessed with embodying the symbol of justice- this time, where everyone can see it. But it wasn’t on his own terms, no; instead of being seen as the ugly but virtuous man before, he has to present himself as a handsome idol, instead of being loved and revered for who he truly is; ugly and all. That it’s not a defect.

And I felt pity for him when I realized that’s what happened.

My opinion and takes (interpretations) of him? He’s interesting, to put it lightly.

If I think more on it, I feel like he’s losing himself to his delusions. It’s ironic: someone focusing on saving the hearts of others, yet all they can see is themselves.

True to the series, Amai reminds me of Genos. Of what Genos would’ve turned out to be if he was kept alone with no one he can truly connect with. No one who can remind him of the sweeter things in life that don’t matter. No one you have a personal, deep connection with to return home to.

Amai strikes me as a man who’s so focused on eliminating evil that he sees it everywhere, no matter how small or large it is, or if it even exists. If someone doesn’t live up to his standards or sees what he sees, he immediately has this sort of insurmountable, unseen distance from them that can’t be easily crossed.

In all honesty, I’m intrigued and worried for him. Part of my indulgent ideas for him is that he’s slowly starting to hallucinate and had started monsterize from the inside for a long, long while, and it’s only by the Association’s dependence on him and his adoring fans that keeps preserving the man that he used to be when he was purely heroic, but hideous. And even then, it’s not enough.

I feel like he’s painted himself in a corner where he feels it’s too late to try and get help for his condition, instead desperately searching for someone who can take his place. He knows how important a symbol is, and if he had the choice, would keep it up as long as he lives, but his passion for it isn’t enough to drive off what he’s becoming.

And he was right.

ZOMBIEMAN:

I may have done Zombieman already, but I also realise that I’ve missed out on some things that I wanted to include~

In contrast to Amai, Zombieman strikes me as the type of guy who’s a sort of ‘Frankenstein’s Monster’ character. Unlike the book character, Zombieman is in a society that accepts, reveres, and adores him for all he does despite his questionable history and to what degree he is ‘human.’ He doesn’t seem to believe that what he is makes up for who he is, and anyone who thinks otherwise will earn his ire; but again, like Frankenstein’s monster, he knows it’s a part of him, and that it’s still a source of discomfort for him. He needs to get that skeleton out of his closet for him to truly enjoy life.

TATSUMAKI:

Honestly, I didn’t notice too much of her character until much, much later in the manga. Prior to that, I admired her ability to take care of the worst threats by herself. Soloist heroes and protagonists were always a soft spot of mine: learning to handle the worst of what life had to throw at you and being good at it, but not necessarily good at taking care of your emotional and mental wellbeing, confiding in others about that, and showing that it’s okay to be vulnerable or lost or flawed, and endeavoring to fix that?

Yesss. Good trope. One of my favorites.

So, what finally caught my attention from her?

Her fight with Psykos.

I was sort of seething with the way Psykos was chilling smugly in her underground lair. Her plan was smart, but the way she was so self-assured and the way she thinks she’s above others; human and monster alike, sipping wine all the while?

That irritated me a lot.

So, to see Tatsumaki rip her from her cozy room and into the fray of the battle, coercing her into spilling intel by twisting her limbs and body each and every way to force it out, and striking fear into her heart with that sadistic, predatory smile of hers?

I loved it. Whoo!

As for takes… I’m not sure if I have any on her to be honest! At least, not one that isn’t already canon. She believes that you shouldn’t rely on others to become strong, or to save you, and has lived up to that idea by herself. She can back up her words and I admire that.

I do feel a little sorry for her, considering what she’s gone through. As much as I agree with her, sometimes she can take it too far.

I was a little irked by her showing little to no concern for shielding her team mates from getting crushed underneath the rubble of a building, with Darkshine stepping in to protect them, but I suppose she had a point; you have to take care of yourself on the battlefield.

Still; her total lack of concern left me a little perturbed.

This was curbed a bit by her refusing to uproot the association until she knew Tareo was safe; I feel like that added more character to her in the manga, as opposed to the webcomic.

In conclusion: All of these characters are good. UoU! Murata and One are great writers, and they made them feel fleshed out and distinct from each other in almost every way possible whilst keeping them believable. And I love them for it. :3

[parachutingkitten]

Season 4 Analysis

STANDARD DISCLAIMER: I am going to be applying the concept of criticism to a TV show you presumably love and adore as much as I do. If you do not want your idea that the show is immaculate to be challenged, I would not advise reading past this point.

Mood for the season: It's a SuPeR fUn HaPpY pLaCe!!!!!

You don’t need to, but if you are interested, and haven’t seen my analysis of past seasons, you can find those here:

Pilot

Season 1

Season 2

Season 3

Hey guys! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Season 4! We are here! I am SO biased with this season. It has problems man. It has ALL the problems! ALL the plot holes! ALL the stupid, stupid stuff, but I LOVE ALL OF IT! okay, let's back up. I'm about to drop some context on you. 

So, when you're a military brat you tend to make friends with whoever you can, and when I lived in Germany I had a friend who was fandom OBSESSED. She, at the time, was super into Homestuck, something I managed to avoid being sucked into, though I do know more about it than I would like. Anyway, this was the point at which I started getting sucked into Ninjago. So, I figured that if I could trust anyone with a strange obsession, it was her. I showed her the last episode of season 3, and she decided she was just going to dive head first into it with me. We watched season 4 together as it came out, we talked about it, had a bunch of inside jokes about it, I wrote some very short fanfiction about it, she made some OCs, one in particular that I remember was Stormy, a ditzy cloud master who wore pink, we shipped him with... one of my OCs, I don't remember. She hadn't watched the first two seasons, so I had to fill her in on a lot, but she was the first person I ever fandomed with, and it was over season 4. So I guess you could say season 3 was the grand beginning of my love for this show, and season 4 was the peak of my fangirl experience (at least for that phase of my life).

Plot

This season is a real mixed bag. Coming off the heels of the first season, nothing makes sense. Suddenly there are more elements, completely discrediting Lloyd's supposed power of four powers. And now it's genetic, which brings up the problem of Jay, who... if either Ed or Edna were masters, they would have slipped by now (but also like, how cool would it be if Edna just busted out with lightning powers) and then Zane who... doesn't have genes. It makes the world bigger, yes, but it also discredits the lore of the last two seasons, and brings up the question "Where the hell were the rest of the EMs when the Great Devour attacked? Or the stone warriors? Or the final battle?!" Anyway, it's a bit jarring and sudden to say the least. It definitely was not planned beforehand. There aren't even any hints in season 3. Like wouldn't it be cool if in season 3 we saw them go to the noodle shop, or Wu was really vague about elemental questions. It would make a lot more sense then. Idk. It opens the universe up to the plotlines of most of the future seasons, but it does sort of discredit the first two. This season is also kinda choppy feeling wise. You go from the mood the past season have had in the first episode to this sort of native tribal feel on the island, and then the factory and then back to Ninjago. It's kinda a mess. Overall it was just an excuse to put these characters in cool situations (which I have done before, I understand). Which I get, and it makes for some cool stuff, but I don't think any of it ends up meshing together super well in the end. When I think of this season I think of the tournament. I forget about the whole snake stuff at the end most of the time. I forget about the while Garmadon conflict. The fact that I forget that's there has to be a bad sign, right?

Characters

Character work this season is really pretty good for the most part! There are a lot of new characters. And they all are very distinct and fun, and even when two people you don't know especially well battle, you're still really invested. All of the Cole and Jay stuff is pretty good this season! Major upgrade from season 3. The whole fight scene is absolutely fantastic. Garmadon is freaking awesome this season. He keeps on trying to kill himself, and it's stupid, and the show sort of acknowledges that it's stupid, cuz Lloyd is just like 'dude, what the heck'. Kai's arch this season is pretty good, exploring his darker side and putting that intense conflict in front of him was good. I can tell you one thing, I like it a heck of a lot better than season 7, but we'll get to that when we get to that. So, yeah. Overall improvement in character! It doesn't dive super deep or anything, but it all works and is all interesting.

Skylor

So... she is one of the reasons I call this season the fanfiction season. We have a whole bunch of other elemental masters we've never heard of, and one of them their power is... all the powers. I can not tell you how much this ticked me off! And she hardly ever uses them! She has pretty much infinite power, and she doesn't think to use it, pretty much ever! There are no restrictions on her! This is what I hate Skylor for. And I do mean hate. BUT aside from that, strictly character wise she is done pretty well. She feels pretty fake and overly sassy at the beginning of the season, but there's a reason for that. It's an act. But it's not like she changed her personality to fool him, she intensified her personality to cover her intentions. Her arch feels pretty natural. That one scene where she does the evil laugh... that was weird. But aside from that, it feels okay. She was raised to think that lying and cheating is the norm, so when someone presents her with another option she begins to change. It makes sense. I love the scene where Kai and her look at each other through the prison bars and (even though their freaking legos) you can feel her realization that she's ashamed of what she's doing now. And after she makes the transition, she's just really chill. Like, I would like to hang out with her. I guess it is kinda sweet that even though she had all of the powers of... ever, at the end she's happy to just run her noodle shop. It's kinda poetic. Anyway, she may be a bit overpowered, and she feels like a bit of a Mary Sue, but overall her personality and interactions are enjoyable enough for me to mostly ignore that. I do agree that she is best used in moderation. She doesn't need to be part of the team. I wish we had a quick cameo each season, but whatever. What we have now in season 9 is nice, but she definitely needs to step back out of the spotlight in future seasons (knock on wood) in order to remain as likable as she's been.

Karlof

Love him. Freaking love him. Honestly, I probably relate to him the most. He's the first loser of the tournament, he avoids trouble, he sticks to what he knows, and he says it like it is. I love his interactions with everyone down in the noodle factory. He's like this perfect blend of optimism and pessimism. His interactions with Cole are beautiful. Their chemistry is really great. One of, I think everyone's favorite masters, and there's a reason why.

Shade

So... typical darkness character. Obviously selfish. But once the climax hits, I actually like him a lot. He kinda serves as an antagonist at first and then flips. It's kinda cool seeing a character with moral boundaries that far out. He's purposely suspicious to take attention away from Skylor, which I get. I think he has a lot of missed potential, but nonetheless, a decent character.

Neuro

I absolutely love his power! I love his manor, I love his voice. He may well be my favorite EM. I don't even know what else to say about this guy. If Karlof is who I am, Neuro is who I'd like to think I am. Calculated, calm, reasonable, and much like Karlof again, not too risky. I like him a lot. Cool guy. I like seeing how far he's willing to go for the ninja, and where certain lines are for him. It's kinda cool to watch. He could use a friend though. I HC he and Paleman hang out. Both quiet. Both reserved. Neuro could probably locate him in a room even if he's not visible. Idk. Anyway, I like him a lot! Great character.

Griffin Turner

Classic speedster. Good enough. Not much to say. He's fun. He's cool. He's what you'd expect. Decent screen time. None of it particularly character developing. For what he is, he's good at it.

Jacob

So, let's ignore the part where they made us think he was dead. He's a lot of fun. Good for them getting a blind character in there. Still confused on what his powers can... do? But I like his spunk. I think we all have a little soft spot for him.

Chamille

One of the only girls and she's pretty much evil. Why do girls have to be evil at one point to be interesting? Idk. Don't really care for her, don't really think much about her. Whatever. She's there. She serves her purpose. Fine. Okay. Moving on.

Paleman

Friggin love him. For the master of light to be invisible is a great move, and pretty creative. His voice is kinda obvious, but very distinct. It's a creative background character to have. I like him a lot. Again, I feel he could use some more love. See above Neuro HC. Like him a lot and... yay.

Bolobo

Kinda missed the "mother nature" pun... could have had at least one more female master... that's okay. He's cool enough. Kinda disappointing though. I mean, vines? Is that it?

Gravis

Gravity is a dang cool power. Idk what else to say. He doesn't get a ton of screen time, so it's hard to praise him too much, but yeah. I really like that. Actually had an FC (she was a villain but you know whateves) with the power, so seeing that be a real element they used is really cool.

Ash

I don't like him. He's very strange. He's just got that one laugh. He seems comically over the top a jerk. I like the way his mouth looks though. Unique and kinda cool. I was looking on his Wiki page, and it said he and Chamille kissed in the background at one point? Is that true? I am way curious now

Tox

Okay. She's nonexistent here, no personality. I guess she's kinda tough. Yeah, this gets confirmed later in season 9, when she speaks. But even there she's pretty nonexistent. Here's my idea. Instead of having all your females being 'tough' why not flip expectation on its head? I think it would be way funny and clever if the master of poison was super friendly, and bubbly, and genuinely a nice person. I'm thinking almost like Jay's (lightning... or I guess adopted) mom, levels of talkative and nice. Wouldn't that be kinda fun? Idk. Whatever. It is what it is.

Kapau and Chope

Best villains ever 10/10. 'Nuff said.

Romance

KAILOR

Okay, I freaking love them! They're not my favorite couple or anything, but they work really, really well… under certain conditions. There are a few bumps I can't ignore. Can we have a protagonist in the show who doesn't send googly eyes at their future love interest the first moment they see her? And remember when they made us think Kai and Skylor were related... yeah... why did we need to do that? That was... kinda uncomfortable. BUT other than that, Skylor is exactly what Kai needed. First, he needed a redhead. Duh. Second, he needed someone who would see right through his Kai shmoltz and be real with him. Third, she had to be fun. And finally, she needed to wear the pants in the relationship. And Skylor fills ALL of those requirements! I like that Kai falls for her right away, and I love that she doesn't think she likes him until... she totally does and it's like 'Oh SNAP!'. I love that weird scene where Chen walks around with Kai like he's already his son in law, that cracks me up! I guess I like them more in theory than in practice. It feels a touch forced, and it needed a bit more time. Point being, the beginnings of the relationship are extremely awkward and strange, but towards the end of the season, it gets good! I just wish we could see more :)

The... love... triangle

Alright, by now, you guys should know how I feel about these things. They suck. They're stupid. I hate them. They're pointless. And this season is... quite possibly the stupidest. So... the whole Garma-Wu-Sako... thing this season is that Wu wrote a letter to Misako a long time ago, and Garmadon stole it, and then... Misako *groan* used it to determine which of them she was going to marry... okay. Yeah, Garmadon, that was a crap thing to do. But you know what, he was evil. Wu should have just signed the thing when he wrote it. But also, Misako... WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' GIRL?! Why... would you let a letter... be the final deciding point? I don't get that. And my main problem is that she basically chose her husband based on his writing ability. The thoughts Wu had in the letter obviously directly express what Garmadon wanted to say. In the end, his feelings for her were still the same. The only thing different is that he didn't write it. He's not good with words the way Wu is. But the show treats it like he lied about his feelings, and didn't even like her. Like he was using her for personal gain or manipulation or something. Idk. The whole thing makes no sense. Now, maybe if he did something to make Wu directly look bad or disingenuous THAT would be understandable. But... idk. I don't get it. Misako sucks. Let's move on.

Villians

Chen

Chen is my favorite villain. Hands down. No competition. Any way you slice it. I friggin love the heck out of this dude. And here's why. First off, he's a very comedic villain that still remains extremely threatening, which is an extremely thin line to walk. I mean, think about it. With all the other villains, they were intimidating, and the henchmen provided the humor. Here, I guess you could say they flipped it cuz Clouse is pretty intimidating, but Chen is still crazy scary on his own. And here's how they do it: He's insane. Straight up, he has lost his mind. Nothing he does makes sense, but that's fine, cuz it probably makes total sense to him. You can laugh at the quirky things he does, but also live in fear knowing that he has trap doors installed EVERYWHERE. Why? Cuz he likes them! Is there a better reason than that when you're crazy! That was my problem with people with Pythor. He is so smart, why didn't he ever think that the devourer might eat him too?! There is no explanation. But with Chen, that doesn't matter! He wants to be a snake! Why? Why not?! No flaws in that thinking, right? This is also why I like Ultra Violet so much. She's the only one to rival his position, but because she's more of a side villain, I don't feel that's enough to dethrone him. With insane villains, you never have any idea what they're playing at, if it's smart, or how to counteract, cuz they're just insane. I mean, seriously,

"Chen, the ninja have figured out our plan, what should we do?"

"COOL! Let's tell EVERYONE our plan!"

And it works! I love his voice. Just the way he says things makes me so happy! He's having so much fun, and I have fun with him! 10/10 villain. Great work.

Clouse

I can't get past the voice. It sounds so over the top evil and... it's kinda annoying for me? He has a decent backstory and such, but whenever he's on screen I always find myself wishing it was Chen. He just sucks the fun out of everything and leaves nothing there, so most of his interactions aren't particularly interesting. I don't know. Never really thought much of him.

Humor

Needless to say everything with Chen works! Everything with the EMs works. Jay's whole Positive Thinking streak is amazing! There's not a lot that falls flat on its face. It's really pretty fantastic.

Favorite joke: too many to count. If I had to pick one...

Chen's: the reds, the purples, the super dark purples!

Drama

This season has some damn good drama. It has my personal most sad moment in all of Ninjago. I'm of course talking about Garmadon's death...  JK! XD I WAS LAUGHING ALL THE WAY THROUGH THAT SEQUENCE! But we’ll get to that later. Okay. But for real, my personal most heartbreaking moment is when we find out Pixal is scrapped (of course it's Pixal related) but seriously, watching this for the first time, it broke my heart hardcore. I audibly gasped. They have these conversations, and she realizes he doesn't remember her, and it hurts her because they were comPATABLE GOSH DANG IT! And then he starts remembering, and she knows she can't go with him, so she lies to him to give him the motivation to make it out, and then the reveal, and Zane's heart breaks, and your heart breaks. This whole scenario reminds me of my own writing, it has all these things I enjoy using. Distinctions between fantasy and reality, characters lying to each other to protect them, and an ending realization of total and complete emptiness. Of course, Pixal is added into his head, and all is fine and dandy. It works for this season but serves her worse in future seasons. Regardless, that moment when Pixal says 'scrapped' is the most depressing thing I've ever seen. All of the Zane drama this season works really well. Zane having an identity crisis is something I didn't think the show would handle. When Zane says he's just a clone if himself I was like 'oh, dang! They went there!'. It's almost like he's comparing himself to Cryptor, and it's some heavy stuff. Everything this season is shrouded in mystery. I love that. For the first half of the season or so, I really like the tournament stuff. But as we get Cole, and especially Jay in the noodle factory, that plotline gets much more interesting. I don't get into the Nya and Lloyd and Garmadon stuff that much. The stuff with Kai is okay. But overall, there's some good stuff.

Climax

Okay, so... I... I mean I like the build up. The thing with all the trucks is really good. Most of it was really pretty good with all the EMs doing stuff the ninja would usually do. But the whole ending thing, with getting mini Pythor involved, and you know. The whole Garmadon death thing. He died an honorable death and all that, but... idk, I can't get past Lloyd's voice. As he reads him off I just couldn't stop giggling! It's so overdramatic, they feel like they need to make Lloyd mad at his dad for whatever reason so he can come back at the last second, and it all feels so forced. And then the ending is super overly cheesy for how serious the show wants to take itself at that moment. Idk. I don't like it. One of my least favorite finales.

Spotlight episode

There are some good ones to choose from this season. Some real good ones. But the one I find myself watching the most is Ninja Roll. This episode doesn't have too high stakes, it doesn't make much sense, it's kind of pointless, but it perfectly encapsulates the reason I watch Ninjago. I don't know exactly why I watch Ninjago. I'm not into the action most of the time. The romance is cute, but not potent enough to warrant watching the show. The humor isn't revolutionary, the characters aren't especially deep. No, the reason I watch Ninjago is cuz it's fun. Ninjago is just a good time. It has just enough of all of those aspects to make for something I love. It makes me smile. With seasons 8, and especially 9, Ninjago has shifted into this darker action based, lore-driven thing, which I thought I would like, and I do, but I think it's lost a bit of that fun factor. In my opinion, Ninjago is it's best when it's self-aware, and doesn't take itself overly seriously. When you don't have to end the season on an ominous dark cliffhanger. I mean really. What is this? Chima? No. I just want to go hang out with the ninja and the gang, whatever it is their doing. This episode takes advantage of every situation a roller derby with the ninja provides. Of course Jay roller skates with his mom. Of course, Kai is incompetent at it. Of course, Chen cheats, of course, it all comes down to Lloyd. Of course, there's freaking buggies that Chen releases! This whole episode makes me smile and laugh and it has a good message. This is what I miss about Ninjago, and that's why it's my spotlight.

Misc

I know everyone always teases Jay about his TV show, but what about Kai and his wrestling career? I just feel like that would come up more often

I completely subscribe to the theory that Pixal was scrapped to fix Zane cuz they beat him up so badly when capturing. I'd kinda like to think Pixal even volunteered herself for it... ONE SHOT IDEA

I have to scratch... my face.

I need a number on the trap door to button ratio on the island

This season has my favorite intro of any season. Mainly cuz the remix is FIRE and I hate the fact that they don't have an extended version that sounds more like the opening itself. 

So all together, the word to sum up season 4 is fun. Definitely not technically the best, or the smartest, or the most well done, but it's my favorite because of nostalgia, my inner child, and because it makes me smile. I love this season.

- Maya (Parachutingkitten)