#you remember i'm still waiting when they will kiss during this song too??

[kurinhimenezu]

Waiting - Adam - HH

!!SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS!!

Author's note: Well as much spoilers as the Hazbin Leaks would give us, but just to be safe! I'm going to put the 'keep reading' before the spoilers.

This was inspired by the song Would You Fall In Love with Me Again? by Jorge Rivera-Herrans and Anna Lea Casey (The Ithaca Saga of Epic the Musical) and I started bawling listening to the whole saga.

I suggest listening to the song before or even during reading this cause it can give you the feeling you get when seeing your favourite show for the first time

SO! I hope ya'll cry too, I love the taste of angst 👌

CW: Angst with comfort, Major character death, hazbin hotel leaks

I am not the man you fell in love with I am not the man you once adored I am not your kind and gentle husband And I am not the love you knew before

Time moves differently in Heaven.

When Lute came to you in the middle of the night with a tourniquet and a missing arm, you knew that Hell won. She held you as you both cried on the ground over Adam’s halo, dull and missing its light.

You remember screaming into the ground as if hell’s princess has killed you herself. Your heart shattering at your husband’s demise.

It rained heavily for the first time in eons, as if the Father himself weeps for his first created son.

Would you fall in love with me again If you knew all I've done? The things I can't undo I am not the man you knew I know that you've been waiting, waiting

Days have blurred together, the Seraphims and cherubs taking care of you in your tender state. The halo of your husband minimized into a bracelet so you may always have a piece of him on you. You were so angry, so lonely, so confused on why he left you.

Your grief knows no bounds, the smile that you once have has not reached your eyes in a while. Always hiding away as Heaven didn’t seem so much of a paradise to you anymore.

Abel, the one you treated as a son, grown as he is, escorted you to your seat in Adam’s counsel box, before leaving you alone to move to his seat, awaiting an emergency meeting.

You did not want to come as the last time you did, you knew of your husband’s secrets, bringing forth a big fight.

What kinds of things did you do?

The guilt of pretending to sleep when he left for the last time almost ate you alive.

You could still feel the soft kiss on your cheek and a whisper of love before he took flight.

"I love you...my sun"

You wish you could’ve said it back.

You remembered the fight vividly, how he yelled and begged you to understand that all of this was to protect you. If his own flesh and blood was killed by a demon spawn, he would never forgive himself if the fallen snake could rise and take you too.

You wished you could’ve heard him out, to understand but the image of those souls screaming and begging for their lives as his army took them down was too terrifying to ignore.

When the speaker of God came from above, you gasped when you finally noticed the serpent in chains in the middle of the court.

It told of its sins in the mortal world, bringing its guilt to the grave. Tears of shame cleansing him of his sins begging the court for forgiveness.

You felt the light wash over you as you grip the edge of the boxseat, listening to the serpent, Sir Pentious, be forgiven by the speaker closest to God.

Adam was…wrong? Both sides were scared. It was only Heaven that attacked first? All in the name of an assumption. You’ve heard of the Queen of Demons and her song of deceit , the first woman. You don’t become the first man’s wife without hearing about the last two.

You saw Lute point to you, crazed that these disgusting sinners should be forgiven. You paid her no mind, only seeing the Sir Pentious.

Lute was taken away, kicking and screaming, for counseling. You almost felt sorry for her. Adam helped her break away from being another blank face in the army. Bringing individuality to his girls to the point they developed their own likes and dislikes, dreams and personality.

His death caused righteous anger with no way to quell the flames.

You prayed Abel can tame the wildfires.

Left a trail of red on every island As I traded friends like objects I could use Hurt more lives than I can count on my hands But all of that was to bring me back to you

The Sir Pentious was under constant watch, he cannot be left alone always having two cherubs on his shoulders for supervision.

You visited him in his workshop, accompanied by Emily the younger Seraphim who trusted the serpent at first sight.

“You were redeemed…”

“Yesss...?”

“Forgive my husband for…hurting you and your friends”

Tears rolled down your cheeks as Sir Pentious wrapped you in his slender arms, saying that he would’ve done the same thing if it meant protecting the ones he loved.

You felt your heart mending itself slowly as you cried the darkness away in his arms, slowly letting hope back inside.

Would you fall in love with me again If you knew all I've done? The things I can't undo I am not the man you knew I know that you've been waiting, waiting

His clawed hands gently strung his guitar, his voice softly echoing as he sang his ballad into the red night. Heart heavy with lament as he finally truly accepted his fate.

The eye of heaven was beautiful in the dark red sky. Golden heaven-borne eyes constantly following the rings spin in its orbit day after day. How long has it been? Will heaven ever forgive him?

Will you ever forgive him…

I will fall in love with you over and over again I don't care how, where, or when No matter how long it's been, you're mine Don't tell me you're not the same person You're always my husband and I've been waiting, waiting

Would he ever know that you were singing the same song as him?  

In the same balcony the first time you sang a duet together?

You have worked with Emily for the redemption of souls. If Sir Pentious can do it, only the truly repentant can so as well.

Adam’s army has trouble accepting Abel as their new leader but some as came forward to continue Adam’s legacy.

Waiting, waiting Waiting, waiting Waiting, oh For you

As you stared into the stars you wondered when your Adam will come back.

Some may have whispered behind your back that it is only the grief talking but you know your bull-headed husband.

He will come back and you’ll be here waiting for him.

You turned around quick, the twang of a guitar hitting the floor upon seeing who would open the balcony doors.

Is it you? Have my prayers been answered? Is it really you standing there or am I dreaming once more? You look different, your eyes look tired Your frame is lighter, your smile torn Is it really you, my love?

“My light, my sun…”

*sniffles*

[mrsfitzgerald]

you see it too, right? 😆

for video big thanks to my dear 💗 eloisebrandtner

[supernovafics]

𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

"i'll be there for you" universe masterlist

pairing: bestfriend!roommate!steve harrington x fem!reader

word count: 2.7k words

warnings: explicit language, alcohol consumption, jealous!reader, a bit of angst, fluff

summary: in which you don’t expect to feel so bothered seeing steve talk to another girl, but you do 

author's note: this was unfinished for months and i finally felt inspired to actually finish it thank god. i'm trying to slowly get back into writing stuff for this series so enjoy this for now<333

general note: everything in this universe/series can be read as standalone oneshots but to understand the full “lore” it would prob be best to read the other stuff too<333

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Summer 1986

When you first heard about the party, you didn’t think too much about it because your Friday night plans were already settled. A simple movie night in your living room with Steve featuring some of the new arrivals that had just gotten to Family Video. However, you still nodded and said a quick, “Maybe I’ll check it out” to your college friend when she told you about her party and you got the address from her too out of niceness. 

It wasn’t until you half-mentioned the party to Robin as you picked through the new arrivals cart during the final hour of her and Steve’s shift that going actually became a possibility. 

“Wait, what? A party at a lake house sounds perfect. We have to go.”

Steve was quick to look up from the computer and shake his head at her words. “No way. We already have plans for the night, Robs.”

The eye roll he received in response was immediate. “You two can waste away on the couch any night you want. Tonight we should go to a party.”

You considered her words and nodded after a second. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“Thank you,” She smiled at you before looking back at Steve. “And you need to remember that I’m only gonna be here for a few more weeks, so we need to do as much stupid shit as we can while I am still here.”

You playfully rolled your eyes at her words. “Okay, you can’t keep using the college card like it’s an ‘I only have two weeks left to live’ card.”

“I second that,” Steve agreed. “Also, you keep making it seem like you’re going thousands of miles away. You’re only gonna be an hour away from here.”

“Yeah, well, still, things are changing,” She told you both. “And I wanna have fun before I leave.”

Fun ended up being an understatement. 

Barely an hour into the party she was drunk due to one too many cupfuls of whatever punch concoction had been thrown together and put in a big bowl in the kitchen. You and Steve shared one cup of the weirdly sweet drink and then decided to simply settle into the role of babysitting Robin. 

You both were currently lingering by a wall and watching as Robin danced with all of the other people crowded in the living room; you vaguely recognized the ABBA song playing. You made a mental note to tell her no if she came running over to you and Steve and proposed the idea of getting another drink. 

“This is your fault, you know,” Steve told you, leaning into your ear to be heard over the music. “If you didn’t mention the party to her earlier, you and I would be on the couch watching a movie and eating takeout from Third Street.” 

You gave him a sad look coupled with a pouty lip and he immediately felt bad, taking your look to heart. He quickly leaned in to apologetically kiss you. 

“Sorry,” He mumbled against your lips. 

You were smiling as he pulled away. “You’re too easy.”

He immediately rolled his eyes at you and playfully poked your side, which made you laugh. “And you’re very evil.”

“Sorry, I had to,” You said and initiated the quick kiss that time around. “Anyway, yes, I know this is my fault and I’d kill to have Third Street right now, but look how happy she is.” You gestured in the direction of where Robin was in the packed living room, dancing with all of the other people who you were convinced were at least half-drunk, but you now couldn’t see her. “Wait, shit, where did she go?��� 

Steve looked around for a second too and then let out a sigh when he also couldn’t spot her. Maybe you two weren’t the best babysitters after all. 

“Okay, I’ll check upstairs and you look around down here,” You said to him. “Oh, and maybe grab some water too. She’ll probably need it sooner rather than later.” 

Steve gave you a quick nod. “Okay.” 

You checked every room upstairs and instead of finding Robin you accidentally interrupted one too many couples making out. After quickly peeking into the last room and mumbling out another “Oops, sorry,” you headed back down the stairs, hoping Steve had better luck than you. You noticed him in the kitchen, two water bottles in hand, and talking to someone who wasn’t Robin but you immediately recognized. 

Vanessa. A girl who was in one of your classes last semester and had gone on a handful of dates with Steve at the end of last year. 

It was hard to decipher what they were talking about right then, but Steve had a small smile on his face and so did she. 

You couldn’t recognize why— or maybe you just refused to admit it right then— but you felt the sudden urge to insert yourself into the conversation; sidle up next to Steve, grab his hand and wrap his arm around you, kiss his cheek or simply plant one on his mouth. Essentially mark your territory for everyone, especially Vanessa, to see. But, you were way too sober to actually consider doing any of that, so you instead looked away from him and went back to searching for Robin.

You found her moments later, sitting on the chair swing on the front porch of the house. 

“Hey, Robs, what are you doing out here?” You asked softly as you sat down next to her, trying not to move the swing too much but that proved to be a lot harder than you thought.

Robin didn’t seem to mind, though. Her eyes were closed as she shrugged at your question. “Just wanted some fresh air.”

“Makes sense,” You nodded. “How are you feeling?”

“Good,” Her eyes stayed shut as she answered you. “Sleepy, but at the same time I kinda wanna get another drink and dance some more.” 

“I’ll allow the dancing, but I need to be a good babysitter right now and say no more drinking.” 

She gave you a quick nod. “The logical side of me knows you’re right.” 

Things got quiet for a second and in that moment of quiet you thought about Steve and Vanessa in the kitchen. It seemed as if all your brain wanted to do right then was play that moment on repeat. You could inwardly admit that the conversation had looked completely innocent and probably quite literally meant nothing, but for some reason, it still bothered you.

“A part of me wishes I got drunk with you,” You said to Robin with a sigh and leaned back into the chair. 

She smiled at that and looked at you. “You definitely still can.” 

Before you could answer, you heard the front door open and subsequently close, and then Steve’s voice filled the brief quiet. “Good. You found her.” 

He handed one of the water bottles he was holding over to you. “I grabbed one for you too.” 

He the. placed the other bottle in Robin’s lap and she gave him a small smile. “Thanks, dingus.”  

If the circumstances were different and your thoughts weren’t confused and scattered, you would’ve shifted over a bit and made room for Steve on the small chair swing, and a random conversation would’ve played out for the next few minutes before you or he suggested leaving. But things weren’t different, so you didn’t.

Steve didn’t think too much of it, though. Instead, he simply asked, “Should we head out?”

You nodded, finally meeting his eyes. “Yeah.” 

He looked at Robin. “We’re taking you to our place, right?”

“Yes, please,” She answered, smiling. “You guys are great babysitters.”

She shut her eyes again and Steve looked at you, giving you a smile and you were quick to force one back. It was then that you could tell that he knew something was up with you because of the look he gave you in response to your forced smile, but he didn’t get to ask you what was going on because Robin was abruptly standing up and asking which way the car was. 

It wasn’t until you all were finally in Steve’s car and driving away from the party— Robin fell asleep in the backseat almost immediately— that he finally asked.

“What’s wrong?” 

You let the question linger in the air for a bit— keeping your eyes focused out the window and letting your fingers mindlessly fiddle with the zipper of your jacket— before you answered him. 

“I don’t know…” You mumbled with a shrug and then you sighed and shook your head. “Actually, I do know, but it’s dumb. It’s stupid.” 

His right hand moved off of the steering wheel and found one of yours. “You can tell me.”

You knew he was right, but that didn’t make being a thousand percent honest feel any easier in this moment. 

“Vanessa was at the party,” You ultimately said, figuring that would be the easiest way to start the conversation.

Steve nodded. “Yeah, we talked for a second.”

“Yeah, I saw,” You said and wanted to end the conversation there, but you knew that you couldn’t. “It kinda annoyed me a bit.” 

“What do you mean?” Steve asked, taking a quick look at you.

“I don’t know…” You sighed again. “Just seeing you guys talking was a little annoying, I guess.”

Things got quiet for a second, and that managed to make you get even more inside your head. Maybe Steve thought you were insane or he was even mad at you for feeling this way. This was entirely unchartered territory between you two, so you weren’t entirely sure what his reaction would be. 

“Oh,” Steve said as if he was realizing something and then smiled a bit. “You were jealous.” 

You immediately rolled your eyes. “Don’t say it like that.”

“Like what?”

You used your free hand to gesture to his face. “With that smile on your face.”

“I think it’s cute that you were jealous,” He told you, pulling your intertwined hands up to his lips so that he could kiss the back of yours.

You shook your head. “No, it’s not.”

“It really is,” Steve said and you decided not to protest him that time around, looking out the window again. 

“I love you, by the way,” He continued. “Just in case you forgot.” 

That managed to finally get a smile out of you.  

“I did forget, actually. Thank you for the reminder,” You joked and then turned to look at him. “I love you too.” 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Guiding a half-awake Robin from the car to your and Steve’s apartment was a feat in itself, but it somehow worked out. You two helped Robin into your bed instead of letting her take the couch and then you set a glass of water and ibuprofen on the nightstand because you had a feeling she’d need it in the morning. 

You changed into your pajamas in Steve’s room, which simply consisted of a t-shirt that you had long ago stolen from Steve and a pair of shorts, and then both you and him settled into his bed. 

He had fallen asleep pretty quickly and you thought, or more so hoped, that you would find sleep easily too, but instead, you tossed and turned in bed because you couldn’t seem to shut off your mind. You weren’t entirely sure why you were still feeling a little sulky and weird about everything— Steve didn’t care and he wasn’t upset with you for feeling jealous— but there was something still nagging at the back of your head about the whole thing.

“I know what you’re thinking right now,” You heard Steve sleepily mumble after what felt like an hour of you trying but failing to force yourself to sleep but it was probably only twenty minutes. His arm circled around your waist and he pulled you back against him. “And you should stop it.” 

The fact that he could easily read your mind wasn’t surprising and it was probably the only thing that made you feel a little bit okay and made you want to at least attempt to verbalize the thoughts that had been running through your head. 

“I just hate being like this. It feels so— I don’t know…” You were then squeezing your eyes shut and pressing your face into the pillow as you admitted, “When I saw you and her talking I really wanted to just go up and kiss you in front of her, so that she knew that we’re together and you’re mine.”

“Mm, you should’ve done that,” He mumbled into your neck. “That would’ve been really hot.”  

You finally turned on your side to face him. “Shut up. I don’t know why I just admitted that, honestly. I told you this was stupid.” 

“Don't feel embarrassed about it,” He said, somehow managing to sum it all up perfectly; you were feeling embarrassed. “This happens to me all the time.” 

You laughed a little. “You don’t have to lie to try and make me feel better about how dumb I'm being.”

“I’m serious,” He told you. “Remember last Thursday when you came to Family Video during the last hour of mine and Robin’s shift?”

When you gave him a quick nod in response, he continued. “I was so annoyed watching you talk to that one guy.”

At first, you weren’t sure what guy he was talking about, but then it hit you. It had been the all too familiar situation where someone thought that you also worked at the store because you were the only one standing behind the counter since both Robin and Steve were stocking shelves. But even after you told this guy that you actually didn’t work there, he kept the conversation going and you laughed and smiled along for a bit to be nice before making up some excuse and retreating to the break room for the rest of Steve and Robin’s shift. 

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “You didn’t seem annoyed at all, and we didn’t even talk about it.”

“Yeah, because for like two minutes I felt jealous, but then I remembered that I’m the one you’re with and nothing could change that— especially not some random blonde guy— so…” Steve trailed off with a shrug and smile.  

As if flicking a light switch, his words changed everything for you. Once again, he was right; there was nothing that could change what you two had. 

“And just so you know,” He continued, voice soft and quiet. “I always feel embarrassed and stupid about it after it happens too.”

You were smiling as you kissed him then, closing the small bit of distance between you two and finding his lips in the darkness that consumed his room. 

“I can’t believe you’re turning out to be the rational one out of the two of us,” You joked when you pulled back from the kiss and proceeded to bury your face into his neck and completely entangle your body with his. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” He whispered back and pressed the softest kiss to your shoulder before he started to pull away from you. You immediately pouted at him in protest but he continued, pulling the blanket off of both of you and getting out of bed. “It’s only midnight. Let’s do what we were actually supposed to do tonight.”

Hearing him say that made you follow suit and get out of bed too, a small smile tugging at your lips. “Movies and Third Street?”

Steve was nodding as he walked over to you, arms slipping around your waist and pulling you close to him. “Yup.”

“That’s a great idea,” You whispered, looking up at him. “But, no funny business on the couch, though. The walls are way too thin and we’ll never hear the end of it from Robin if she hears anything.”

“Okay,” Steve said, and then proceeded to kiss your forehead and then both of your cheeks and then your neck; all of which made you softly laugh. “Sorry, just needed to get those out of the way first.”

You gave him an understanding nod that you hoped looked as serious as you wanted it to be, but there was a wide smile on your face as you spoke. “Okay, yeah, makes sense.”

He gave you one final kiss, that time against your lips, and then he was pulling away from you and heading toward his shut door. Your arms circled around him from behind as you followed him out into the living room. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

let me know ur thoughts<333

(requests are open for stuff you wanna see in the universe/series!🫶🏾)

[good-griief]

losing game pt. 1

HEYYYY i'm actually back with a lil smutty angsty ellie fic bc i needed to write for this woman... anyway here's part one its only a lil angsty i just wanted an excuse to write rly gay smut so enjoy and p2 tmrw!!

as most of yall know any reader i write (as a poc writer) has no race, i just wanted to use a picture of taylor momsen bc i love tpr and that's definitely the vibe of the music in this fic

part two part three

read me click me

──────────✿───────────

Being in the rock scene was your dream. You started with small gigs, then small venues and festivals, and now you had a band to go along with your music. Your career was kicking off and it felt like heaven; every performance, every song, all the adrenaline made for some of the best nights of your life. 

When you picked your band, you hand-selected each member, and to say you picked your guitarist for any reason other than how pretty she was would be a lie. Yes, she was amazing, but you also couldn’t speak when she walked in for her interview. She just smiled, laughing at the way you stared at her before your manager started talking for you. He often did, she came to realize. 

She still accepted the moment you offered her the position, but she made it clear that she didn’t like your manager. She accepted for you; to be with you.

And she slowly became your favorite part of performing. You had this way of connecting with each other — of course, you were close with all of your band members, but she was different. You’d spend time together one-on-one, smoking a joint and talking about nothing until one of you had to force yourself to go. You’d get coffee together, have dinners, and even spend the night at each other’s apartments. Whenever someone asked about you two, you said you were best friends. Even when she was waiting for you at the end of the carpet, and you both laughed at your answer like it was some kind of inside joke. 

Even when you were onstage, on your knees, singing your most sensual song to her as she melted to your level, smirking as her hips thrust against the electric guitar. Sometimes, she even sang with you. You’d hold her face, or thread your fingers through her hair as you held eye contact or rested your forehead against hers with shut eyes, and if there was a break in the song you’d kiss her hard — a stage kiss that the crowd would erupt in cheers over. But they happened offstage, too… after a shared joint or during a party. Nothing more.

She’d let you place your fingers on the strings of her guitar to find the chords as you stood behind her, her head leaning back on your shoulder in a way that showed the muscles on her neck as she breathed in heavy, hot breaths. She let you wrap your hand around her throat, groaning in your ear as fans caught pictures of you dragging your tongue over her sweat-ridden jaw or biting her shoulder as she grinned. 

There was one night you let her take over the mic as you danced along. She played her guitar, singing and watching you until you sang with her. Your hands drifted down her thighs as you kneeled behind her, the crowd screaming as you lifted her shirt and came around to kiss the line of hair below her belly button. She smirked, stopping her playing and fisting your hair to pull your head back as you laughed. 

Nights when you’d take off your shirt, tossing it into the audience and pouring your water on yourself before she came to lick it up, tongue dragging over top of your breasts as you sang breathlessly. There were times she had to wrap her arm around your back to keep you standing when she did that, the action so intimate, so arousing, that it was hard to remember why you were on stage and not in your dressing room, alone with her. Some nights she’d take her shirt off and give it to you if she didn’t want anyone else to see you, smiling at you with her shirt on before you came over to kiss her cheek. 

There were moments with other band members, but none of them were like her. They didn’t make you feel the same — none of them were her. 

So, when the end of her contract came up and she talked to you about leaving to pursue other things, you were devastated. You didn’t think she’d leave, but after a talk with your manager, her decision was set. 

“I think you should,” you told her anyway. “Whatever makes you happy, Els, seriously. I’ll support whatever you do.” She smiled, taking your hand to kiss. On the inside of her fingers, and yours, you could see the matching tattoos you got months ago, threading your fingers together so they match up. 

You dedicated your last show with her to her. It was a surprise, and she cried when you said it in the beginning, but she just turned away to shake it off quickly. At least, she did until you started crying during a song you wrote for her — it was another surprise from you and the rest of the band, but the minute she saw you crying she couldn’t keep it together. She came over to hug you, kissing the top of your head as she let you hide your face in her chest. The crowd awed, but Ellie took the mic to say you’d be back. She set it down and lifted your head to make you look at her. “I love you, pretty girl,” she said, away from the microphone so no one heard her, but they could sound it out if they wanted to. “Please don’t cry.” She wiped beneath your eyes, ignoring the camera flashes and screams from the crowd. “I hate that I can’t do anything about it right now.”

You smiled. “I’m gonna miss you so much.” 

She laughed at you. “It’s not like I’m going anywhere.” She nodded to the microphone. “Finish my song, I wanna hear the rest.”

“You’re an idiot,” you said, now standing at the mic and making the audience laugh. 

You were such an idiot. 

She never told you what other things she wanted to pursue, but you should’ve known. 

Of-fucking-course she was pursuing her own music. Of-fucking-course she was starting her own band. With yours. Of-fucking-course all of their contracts ending over the course of a few months would amount to this. Of-fucking-course each last show you dedicated to them meant nothing. 

You couldn’t even be mad. It was smart. But you were beyond hurt. 

And she still dedicated her first show to you. She texted you herself, asking you to come. 

When would you learn your lesson?

“I just want to thank you guys for coming,” she said to an audience of mostly your fans. “You might know me — us — from a backup band, but we got a little tired of being backup, didn’t we?” The band laughed. “So, uh, my name’s Ellie if you don’t know… probably don’t,” she laughed as if you’d never thanked or introduced your band before. “And I just want to dedicate this show to the previous artist I worked with. I wouldn’t be here without her, so she means… a lot,” she said it so fucking snarky, “to me, and… I have a few songs for her… if you all wanna guess which ones they are.”

And her first song was the biggest Fuck You song you’d ever heard. 

Still, she texted you after the show. 

She didn’t ask you to come to another show, and maybe that was because you announced a break from music, or because she was getting so much attention that she didn’t care. You saw her at award shows sometimes, and she would cheer when you won. Of course, you’d cheer for her too, but it never went beyond that. Almost like it was an unspoken rule that you weren’t on speaking terms. 

But the minute you came back to the scene, almost a year later, she texted you for the first time since her first show. 

You didn’t reply at first. You hadn’t kept up with her at all during your break, your manager telling you to stay away from any of her and her band's promotions and interviews. He had you block all of them and their numbers, but you couldn’t bring yourself to block Ellie’s. And you were glad you didn’t. Usually, you didn’t have your phone on you until late at night, your manager having your assistant handle your messages and social media, but you were about to fall asleep when she texted. As if she remembered your schedule. 

And it prompted you to look her up. Then her and you, and you could see countless videos. 

every time ellie has mentioned “her” compilation was what you decided to click on. It was made by an account that was clearly a big fan of hers, so you readied yourself for any hate that’d be thrown your way. 

The first clip was an interview, asking her why she split from your team. “You know, I really loved her and her team,” she said, “still really love her. It’s just hard being reminded, constantly, that you're a stepping stone and your time is running low, you know? We might’ve held her back if we stayed, and she was moving on to better things,” it sounded like she was quoting someone else. “—I mean, she always wanted us to shine, and I’m so grateful for her. I really miss being on stage with her, but I don’t miss anything else besides her and I think that says a lot.” 

Another was on her way into a hotel, a reporter asking if you congratulated her on an award. You could remember seeing her at the show before your manager called you over just as she was walking your way. She laughed, “haven’t talked to her in months.” 

Another of a sit-down interview with the whole band, your name being brought up and Ellie snapping at them, “You know I really wish people would stop asking me about her.” She got choked up as the others answered, nose reddening when the question finally circled back to her. “We’re not friends, we don’t talk, she doesn’t want anything to do with us, so...” She shrugged, pissed off. 

The next was another interview. It seemed she was just having to get used to being asked about you. “I’ve tried to reach out,” she said, “maybe she changed her number.” 

Another. “She was my best friend, I miss her a lot. I hope she’s doing okay.” 

And another, asking about her songs. “Yeah, I wrote a lot about her — No, I don’t regret it. I feel like it reflects a moment in time, you know? It was a really nice moment — I mean, I still have our matching tattoos,” she laughed, showing the tattoos on the insides of her fingers. 

Another, after a show. She was always emotional after shows, and it made it harder to watch as she wiped her eyes when the interviewer asked what your relationship really was. “I don’t fucking know,” was her answer before she walked away. 

Some of them were sweet, memories you shared that made you laugh. Others made you sick with guilt, like when she mentioned your lack of response or you blocking the band. Some just made you sad. And you felt like an idiot for doing this, but after reading the comments, some defending you for not running your socials or phone, or angry with you for the same reason, you played a compilation of the two of you together from the same account. 

Then you called Ellie. 

It rang once before sending you to voicemail and you just hung up. You kept your attention on the video to distract yourself from how much that stung. 

But she called right back. 

You stared at the phone for a moment, seeing the contact poster of the two of you at her last show with you lighting up your screen and feeling your words get caught in your throat as your eyes stung. You grabbed the phone, answering quickly. “Ellie?” It was silent, “Ellie, I just wanted to say, I had no idea… I understand if you never want to talk to me again, but I—“ You cleared your throat, trying not to sound like you were about to cry. “I’m really sorry.”

“I thought — I didn’t think you were going to — It feels so good to hear your voice,” was what she settled on after stammering through a few sentences. “You have no idea how much I’ve, just, wanted to talk to you��”

You bit down on your lip as you listened to her. She didn’t sound angry, but she clearly had so much to say to you. Her voice was filled with feeling as she went on, trying to get everything out as if she thought you’d hang up the phone at any minute. You just listened, shutting your eyes and bringing your hand over your face as hot tears spilled down your cheeks. You couldn’t bring yourself to understand why you were so emotional, maybe it was the fact that you misunderstood her so easily, or that your manager had ruined your relationship with her, or maybe it was even that you were just getting to hear her talk after so long, but she paused the moment she heard you trying to calm your breathing. 

“Please don’t cry.” She already knew. “I hate it when you cry and I can’t do anything about it.”

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled. “Keep talking. What were you saying?” You looked at your computer, auto-playing something else of the two of you. It was clips of you on stage and during interviews, heads on each other's shoulders, hugging, kissing each other’s cheeks, singing together. You pursed your lips, tears coming quicker as you slammed your laptop closed. “Ellie,” you cut her off, biting at your lip as you looked at the empty spot on your bed she used to take some nights, “what are you doing right now?” 

“I’m on my way,” she said quietly, and you could hear her shuffling on the other line. She was probably getting ready to go to sleep, and wake up to no response just like every other time she messaged you. And you would have woken up with no idea she even texted you. “Do you want me to stay on the phone?”

“If you’re already headed to sleep—“

“I’m coming over,” she said. “I’m already in the car, I’ll be there in ten, okay?”

“Okay…” Now you felt bad for making her leave her house, looking outside at the snowfall and sniffling as you tried to wipe your eyes. “I’ll see you soon.” You hung up the phone and groaned at yourself, shoving your head in your pillow. 

You opened your laptop, typing in the song names people speculated she wrote for you and queuing them all. Not one was the one you heard during her first show, and it made you feel even worse by the time the doorbell rang. You moved off of your bed, wiping your eyes and going to the door to buzz her up to your apartment. 

You waited by the door, balls of your feet kicking at the floor as you crossed your arms and waited for her to knock. It was the same rhythm she used to knock in, and where it usually made you smile, it made you cry more. God, you missed her, and you didn’t even realize how much until now. You took too long to open the door and you heard the lock click. She still had her set of keys, and that made you feel worse, too. She’d probably texted you about returning them, and you never got to see it. Nothing was making you feel better as she opened the door, and seeing her face just made it worse. 

“God,” she muttered, immediately bringing her arms around your waist. She tucked her head into your shoulder, shutting her eyes as your arms went around her shoulders. Her hands held you like you’d disappear the minute she let go, thumbs running soothingly back and forth over your shirt. “I missed you so much,” she said. “They all wanted me to get over it, but I knew there was no way — I knew we had something more than just — fuck, I know you better than they do. I know I do.” Her lips brushed your skin with every word. “I missed you so fucking much,” she repeated, hugging you tighter. 

Just her touch made your tears slow to a stop, relaxing into her hold and hugging her so tight, but she didn’t care. She was happy to be back in your arms. Your hand drifted to her hair, cradling her head to your shoulder. You could remember the nights you spent playing with her hair until you fell asleep and the thought made you run your fingers through it. She sighed, pulling her head back but refusing to let you go. 

There was a silence as you moved her hair out of her face, tucking the strands behind her ear. Slowly, your hand cupped her cold, flushed cheek. She leaned into your touch, eyes falling to your lips as your thumb stroked her cheek. 

“Ellie,” you muttered and she hummed, turning her head to kiss the inside of your palm. “I missed you, too,” was all you chose to say despite the wanting in the way you said her name. Her hand took yours as she kissed the inside of your wrist. “So much…” Her kisses trailed up your arm, with more of a meaning behind them than any of the kisses you’d given each other before. 

You moved your hand back to her face, turning her head toward you. She met your eyes, hers shining in the low light. They fell to your lips again and she leaned in, kissing your cheek. She kissed away every tear stain, still wet and warm. She moved closer and closer to your mouth, but never kissed you, kissing away the stains on your other cheek instead. 

Then you turned your head, catching her lips for a brief moment before she pulled back. There was a moment of hesitation, neither of you able to speak before she pressed her lips to yours. They were still cold from being out in the snow, but they warmed as you kissed her back, pressing your body impossibly closer to hers as she sighed into your mouth. She couldn’t tell you how long she had wanted this, but she knew it was long enough that her waiting for you was pathetic.

[7seas-of-ryy]

Come Back To Me

Author’s Note: Italics are flashbacks! Grumpy x Sunshine! No shenanigans in this one! I'm sorry!

Summary: You had always been the positive one in the IC but one mission can change everything. Set during the war with Hybern!

Pairing: Azriel x Reader

Warnings: talks of torture, let me know if I need to add any others :)

"Hey, I brought you something to eat." Azriel barely whispered as he entered your room.

You looked his way but said nothing, then turned your head back to what you were looking at. The view of the city from your room was always gorgeous, but now it was just something to for you to stare at while you struggled to get through the days.

Disappointment flooded the shadowsinger when you made no move to grab the food.

It had been months of this. Months of him trying to get you back to how you used to be. It seemed you made no improvement but he still tried.

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"Azzzzzz" You called out in a sing-song voice.

"What now?" He grumbled out.

He was trying to do work, frustrated he couldn't find a solution for Rhysand. And being holed up in the library was not helping his mood.

"You have to try this! I picked it up at the bakery and it is delicious!" You told him with pure excitement, not letting his attitude alter your mood.

You never let anyone get in the way of your mood. Happiness seemed to be easy for you. Glass half full was definitely how you viewed life. Azriel envied that.

Without waiting for a reply from the male, you held up the pastry to his mouth.

"I can feed myself." He spoke and gave you a look.

Instead of replying, you put the pastry in his face again. He rolled his eyes yet took a bite of the treat.

It was the most delicious thing he had ever tasted. His eyes immediately shut and groaned. That was what you loved, seeing these small moments where he wasn’t worried about saving everyone.

You could see the frustration fade from his face, replaced by awe of how amazing the baked good was.

"You can have the rest! I'll get out of your hair so you can get back to work. Oh! I almost forgot, I also got you this coffee, let me know if you need any help!" You told him as you made your way to the exit.

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The spymaster felt useless. It seemed there was nothing he could do for you... until an idea came to him.

He got to the bakery as fast as possible and bought the same pastry that you had bought him all those years ago. He grabbed himself a coffee and made his way back to you.

After knocking on your door to let you know he was coming in, he walked over to you.

"Guess what I got you!" He said with a smile, "Its one of those pastries that you love so much!"

He held it in front of you and you didn't even look his way.

Suddenly his apetite was gone. He didn't think it was possible for his heart to hurt anymore than it currently did. He kissed the top of your head and let you be.

Without another thought, he went to find Rhys.

"Help her. I don't care what you have to do, help her right now." Az pleaded.

"You know I can't do that. She hasn't asked me to and I don't do that without consent." Rhys told him.

"This is all your fault! You should have stopped her! Forbid her from using herself as a distraction! She is a shell of herself because of you!" Az was now shouting, letting his emotions take over.

"Do you think I don't know that? Do you think I wanted to leave her there?" Rhys shouted right back.

He was hurting from all of this too, everyone in the IC was. They had saved you and yet it seemed everyone was mourning the person you once were.

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He could hear you giggling before he saw you. As he entered his room, he saw you standing with your hands behind your back and a giant grin on your face.

Az eyed you suspiciously and crossed his arms over his chest.

"What're you doing in my room?" He questioned and his voice was rougher than he wanted it to be.

"Do you remember your leathers that ripped during the last mission we were on?" You asked the male.

He nodded his head in response, waiting for you to continue.

"I fixed them!" You said, revealing the repaired leathers that had been behind your back.

"I sewed them up and reinforced the seam!" You told him with such excitement.

His eyes softened slightly and he wanted to reach out and hug you but he couldn't let himself. He wouldn't let himself get too close to you, couldn't handle the pain of another loved one getting hurt.

"Thank you," He spoke bluntly then cleared his throat, "What were you laughing at?"

"A few of your shadows and I were just thinking about how you ripped them. I can't believe your leg slipped and you did the splits!" You let out another giggle.

He tried to fight it but a small smile made it's way to his face at your joy.

"Well, thank you again." He spoke quickly before you noticed his grin.

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He looked down at his clothes as he sat next to you in your room, there were small holes and rips all over them.

Normally you repaired them without him asking. He told you that you didn't have to but you assured him you wanted to. Now, he refused to let anyone else fix his clothes.

"Mor refuses to be seen with me in public." Azriel told you with a small laugh.

"She says I look homeless with all these rips in my clothes. But I don't care, I don't trust anyone else to sew my shirts besides you." He spoke again with a smile.

You still stayed completely still, staring at the city below. You felt hollow. It didn't matter that you were still alive, you were dead as far as you were concerned. There was no way to continue life after everything that had happened.

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It was supposed to be simple, meet with Eris, gather information on Hybern and return to the Night Court. The four of you weren't expecting a trap.

As you entered the old building to meet Eris, you could sense something was off. Your suspicions were confirmed when one wrong step set off a trap. Arrows, ash wood arrows shot out from all directions. Luckily you weren't hit by any. Two hit Rhys, one in his shoulder and one in his wing. One hit Feyre in her leg. And four...four hit Azriel; two in his wings, one in his side and one in his leg.

You ran to Az to help him, seeing he had the worst wounds.

"Hey hey, you're ok. I'm going to get you home and we can heal you up, ok?" You told him, giving him a smile that didn't reach your eyes. You forced your tears away, not willing to let him think you were worried.

He loved that smile. He was dying and yet all he could think about was how much your smile meant to him.

As you were trying to break the arrows so you could pull them out of him, you noticed his face pale. And then you heard it, Hybern's soldiers.

The trap must have alerted them and they would be here any minute.

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Rhys had told Az that you drank a few sips of water and ate a tiny bit. As soon as he got the news, he was running to your room. You hadn't responded to anyone at all yet but he seemed to be filled with a new hope.

So, he sat here talking to you and couldn't keep a smile off his face.

"I heard you got some food down, I'm proud of you." He gently offered his words.

He stayed with you for the rest of the day, talking to you about any and everything. He had never spoken so much in his life.

Months passed after that with no more improvements in your condition, it seemed you would never get better. He knew he fell in love with you no matter how hard he tried to stop it, so he fought like hell to hold onto whatever hope he had.

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You dragged Az with all your strength over to Rhys and Feyre. She seemed to be doing ok despite the arrow still sticking out of her thigh. She had pulled the arrows out of Rhys but he was still very hurt.

"Are you ok to winnow?" You asked Rhys.

"I think so, but I won't be able to carry all three of you." He spoke through pained breaths.

"You don't need to. Just get Feyre and Az out of here." You commanded your High Lord.

You knew that if they stayed, you would all be dead. Rhys couldn't carry all of you in his condition, you just hoped he would listen to what you told him to do.

"What? No, how will you get out?" Azriel whispered from the ground.

"I have a plan." You told him.

"You three can't fight, you will die if you stay here. Winnow them out and get Az to a healer." You told Rhys through your mind.

He seemed to be going back and forth in his head, trying to figure out a different way. He gave you a weary look.

"There's no other way. I'll be ok, you have to go now. They're almost here." You added.

The soldiers came running in, ready to attack. You ran right at them, fighting them so they couldn’t get to the other three. You could hear Az screaming to stay as Rhys grabbed him and winnowed out.

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He had been drunk for three days straight at this point. He welcomed the numbness after all the agony he has felt. Once it was night time, he made his way to your room and sat down outside of your door to sleep, just like he did every night in case you needed him.

In the morning, Feyre passed by your door. Az was still asleep and smelled of booze.

She quietly snuck past him and went into your room.

"Hey, I'm not sure what to say or do to help you. But I wanted to let you know how hard Azriel is trying. I mean...you know that but I just want you to realize how much he loves you. How much we all love you. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about what happened, I wish it had been me instead... but you need to know that Azriel is drowning. He is drowning without you. I have never seen him like this and I think we might lose him for good. If you don't have the strength to fight for yourself, please… fight for him." Feyre pleaded with you.

You didn't respond but what she said stuck with you. You had tried everything but it didn't matter, you couldn't find the strength to help yourself. Maybe it would be easier to find strength for the one you love.

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"We just got word. Y/N is alive and we have her location." Rhys spoke quickly.

Azriel shot up from his spot, getting his weapons ready instantly.

As soon as everyone was set, they left to rescue you. After a couple hours, they found you. You were bloody and bruised all over, chained up. Tears welled up in Azriel's eyes but he focused on saving you. He flew you home and you showed Rhys everything.

Rhys saw how you were tortured, starved, and beat every day. He saw how they questioned you about the Night Court and you never gave up anything. You were held captive for three months…he wasn’t sure how you survived.

After they saved you and found out everything you went through, Azriel helped you bathe. You never talked, just nodded or shook your head and you never looked up. He was so grateful you were safe and back with them but he sure did miss your smile.

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It was a beautiful morning, you sat watching the orange and pink sky as the city woke up. There was a knock at the door and Az walked in. He didn’t speak as he set a tray of breakfast foods and coffee down. You didn’t even look over at him but not because you were still checked out. No, this time it was because you couldn’t pull your eyes from the beauty of the sunrise.

You aren’t exactly sure why but you felt something crack inside of you, this was the first time since you were taken that you felt something positive. It was the first time you wanted to live to see these pink and orange hues again.

When Azriel looked over at you he realized there were tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Are you ok?! What’s wrong!?” He panicked, checking everywhere for threats.

“It’s beautiful.” You choked out in between sobs, pointing at the sunrise.

He let out a breath he had been holding in and visibly relaxed. He sat next to you and pulled you close. You leaned into him and he put his arm around you. Neither of you talked, just enjoyed watching the sky come to life in front of you.

He looked down at you after some time had passed and saw the faintest smile on your face. It was barely there but he saw it and that was all that mattered.

“It’s breathtaking.” Azriel stated.

You shook your head in agreement, but what you didn’t know was that he wasn’t talking about the view, he was talking about you.

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“Please please please!” You begged Azriel.

“You woke me up at 4am to watch the sunrise?!” He mumbled with a look of irritation on his face.

“You have to see it! I promise it’ll be worth it!” You continued to beg.

“Fine but I’m not going to be happy about it.” He grunted as he got out of bed, following you to the balcony.

You pulled him down next to you, the pure excitement and adoration you had for something as simple as a sunrise made the spymaster’s heart clench.

The both of you sat and watched the sunrise and you laid your head on his shoulder.

“Isn’t it so beautiful?” You asked him without taking your eyes from the sky.

“It really is.” He responded without taking his eyes from you.

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[slutforfictionalwomen]

Supposed to be a thrill

Kinktober day 1

Rhea Ripley x Fem Reader

Main kinks: Bondage, bloodkink, knife kink.

Word count: 1,6K

Summary: Rhea takes Reader Halloween shopping. What Reader doesn't know is that Rhea has entirely planned out a surprise for when they get home.

Warnings: Slight manipulation, smut, knife play, blood play, bondage, cunnilingus, strap on use, pet names. (Please tell me if I missed anything)

POV Reader

Excitedly, I get into Rhea's black truck as she told me to. I check my pulse while waiting for Rhea to finish up, it's high. This is something I've been looking forward to for so long, getting Halloween decorations with my dark, older girlfriend who is the love of my life.

"You seem tense, baby," Rhea notices as she hops onto the driver's seat. As always, I squirm at the nickname and don't bother to hide the blush on my face.

"Just excited. This is my first full Halloween with my favourite person." I cannot hold back the wide smile on my face. Luckily, this woman of my dreams knows how deeply I feel things. With all the before, I've had to keep in the emotions I felt. With Rhea, I can feel when I feel and stare blank when I don't have any emotions to show on my face at all.

I hear the engine of the car start. Rhea nods, with one of those smiles that seem to make time stop. "I'm glad to hear that, darling. Just don't get your heart too worked up, I know how overwhelming things can be for you." We drive away from our house, to Rhea's favourite shop for Halloween stuff. That's what she said, at least.

About fifteen minutes later, we walk into a theme shop that has almost entirely been transformed into a Halloween shop. "I love this so much," I say wide eyed.

"Well, go ahead and take a look." That's how we get started, looking for anything fitting our spooky aesthetic. At some point, Rhea leaves my side for a few minutes, saying she's getting a particular object that she knows they sell here, but it's a surprise.

When we get home, we each put down a paper bag full of stuff. It's around eight pm, we ate food at a place on the way home. I still don't know what Rhea bought as a surprise, she told me to go to the car when she paid. "Can I now know what you got?"

Rhea looks me up and down as I'm sitting on the table. "No princess, that's for later. Go take a shower first." She takes a step forward, pressing a loving kiss on my head. I agree to taking a shower, but I'm still curious.

After a hot everything-shower during which I sung my heart out to my favourite songs, I have completely forgotten about the surprise. I get into some comfy clothes in our bedroom. I'm putting on a hoodie when I hear the light switching off and our LED light being plugged in. "Well baby, I see you've put on some clothes, but it's time to take them off for me again."

I didn't hear Rhea coming in, but now she's speaking in her dominant voice, which immediately makes me react. I pull the hoodie back over my head. As soon as it's on the floor, Rhea's behind me tying a blindfold over my eyes. "Rhea, what is this?" Before I know, I'm being thrown onto the bed.

"Time for your suprise," she says with a ring in her voice, feigning innocence. "Do you remember the rules?"

Of course I do. Speak only when spoken to, use mistress to adres her, safeword when needed. "Yes, mistress."

"Such a good little girl." Her hands are on my body, ripping off my shirt and underwear. "Are you gonna be a nice girl for me? Are you gonna make me proud?"

Before I can answer, she collapses her lips into mine. She's so rough but loving at the same time. I reach my hands up to pull her closer, but she is faster and pushes my wrists above my head with one hand. Abruptly, she pulls away. I reach for her, but I can't feel her anywhere.

"Oh baby, I'm just getting some stuff to start the fun." I hear her voice quite far away, on the other side of the room. Though a few seconds later, a rope is being wrapped around my arm. I feel her lips close to my ear. "I'm going to spread you out nicely so I can see your entire bare body, even that pretty pussy of yours. Or should I say mine? We all know who that pussy belongs to, and every other part of your body."

"I'm yours mistress," I say, falling into subspace. Both my ankles and wrists are being tied to each corner of the bed, spreading me out like she said she was going to do. When she's done, she climbs up my body to kiss me.

"Yes princess, you're mine." She kisses down my body, stopping right above my desperate heat. I groan in frustration. "Shh baby. You're so wet for me, so needy. But I have one more little surprise for you." She gives my pussy a quick kiss, but immediately shifts on the bed.

A few seconds later, something sharp is pressed onto my inner thigh. It doesn't hurt, but I flinch at the feeling. "Easy baby, it's just a pretty little play knife. Actually, it's not, but it's our play knife now, only for you. I wish you could see how pretty the design is, but that would spoil the fun, wouldn't it?"

I moan when she presses it down a bit harder. It doesn't slice the skin, but it hurts a bit more now. I can feel it is sharp, but I kind of like that. "Are you going to let me use this on you? Are you gonna be my good girl?" Rhea's dominant voice is low and sultry, she takes away the knife from my thigh.

"Yes, mistress." As soon as the words leave my mouth, hers is on my pussy. I feel metal pressing against my throat, which makes me yelp and try to stay as still as possible. Her tongue flattens and laps my clit with passion, if it wasn't for the knife against my throat I would be bucking my hips up into her face.

"Hmm do you want me to make you come? You're doing so well, darling." Her words make me whine loudly. Her knife leaves my throat again, but also her lips leave my body.

"Mistresssss," I pout. I feel her fingers on my nipples, teasing my body.

"You didn't think I was just gonna let you come, did you?" She chuckles. "Dumb baby. You have to earn that, and I know just the right way." She yanks on one of the ropes when I shift my body and presses the tip of the knife into the skin of my left thigh. "Can I mark you? Just two letters, just my initials. I'll then let you come, I promise."

I'm a bit afraid of it, but I do really want to come. I know it's manipulative, but I also know that she cares about me. She'll make sure nothing bad happens to the wound. "Okay, mistress," I answer with a small voice.

"Oh princess, I love you so much." She leans down to kiss me, making me taste myself. When she pulls away, her knife is back on my thigh. I yelp when I feel the first slice.

"Rhea!" The second slice comes fast after my slip out. I know I have to call her by her title, but I couldn't help it. I try not to act up, but I cannot help the tears rolling down my cheeks. The second 'R' is now being carved into my inner thigh.

"That's a good baby!" Immediately after the praise, her tongue meets my thigh, lapping up the droplets of blood. I hear how she hums, I know she's a menace, but I kind of love that about her. Within mere seconds, her tongue is back on my bundle of nerves.

Her lips wrap around my clit, sucking on it. That's when my legs start to tremble uncontrollably. The knifeplay has worked me up more than I knew, and I'm not far away from the edge.

When I think I can't hold it anymore, I know I have to ask whether I can if I don't want to be punished. "Please mistress, can I come?"

For a few seconds, I don't get an answer, and then I finally hear her voice. "Come for me, baby." It is all that it takes for my orgasm to rip through me. I whine out and yank on my ropes, but of course they won't budge.

I feel how my legs are being freed, but not for long. "You didn't think it was over yet, did you?" Rhea chuckles as she ties the ropes of my ankels up to where my wrists are tied, so I'm tied in her famous 'Pretzel pin'.

For a few seconds I don't feel her contact, but then her fingers are on my sensitive clit. All of a sudden, a strap is being pushed inside of me. "Mistress!" I scream as she immediately starts a pounding pace.

It feels really good, but again, tears start to roll down my cheeks. I feel how she wipes them away with the hand that isn't on my hip, and then uses that same hand to circle my clit with her fingers.

Her hips meet my thigh with every hard, fast, deep thrust. It almost hurts, but it feels so good. I know I'm making an awful lot of noise, but I can't bother to even try keeping it down.

When I start to yank on my ropes again, Rhea already knows what's going on. She knows how overstimulated I am, and how badly I want to finish.

"Come for me like the filthy slut you are."

[thejakeslayla]

╰─▸❝ when niki comes home tired ❞

pairing enhypen x gn! reader ୨୧ genre fluff ୨୧ warnings none

  you sat in your bedroom, scrolling through social media, as a soft melody of ‘bloosom’ played. you always liked playing enhypen’s songs when niki was away, but today he came back, and you couldn’t be happier.   as his voice played from the speakers, you closed your eyes, enjoying the way he sounded, how softly he sang. the song being japanese made everything better, as it brought more comfort. you felt this weird but somehow familiar feeling in your chest—warmth exploding in your body now.   you missed your boyfriend so much that you couldn’t help the tears spilling out of your eyes. it was then that your phone suddenly rang, stopping the music.   "hello?" you spoke into it, and yet again, warmth appeared when you heard his voice.   “i'll be home in five. i miss you.”   you smiled even though he wasn’t able to see it.   “i'm waiting, be safe.”   "of course i love you. see you soon.”   and just like that, the door to your shared bedroom opened after ten minutes. you jumped out of bed and ran towards niki, tightly hugging him. his low chuckle filled the room as niki also wrapped his hands around your body. the hug was long, just as time stopped.   “i missed you so much.” you muffled into his chest, finally looking up. the tears appeared again; he looked so tired and exhausted; it just hurt you to see him like that. his whole face was almost empty; only a soft, but still weak smile brightened the rest of his face. huge eye bags, his gaze also tired, but somehow still filled with love for you.   “i missed you too; you have no idea. with each concert, each live, interaction with engene, or just travelling, i thought of you 24/7. “   you hugged him again, and even though he was tired, he easily picked you up, moving towards the bed. as he rested you there, his body almost instantly fell on yours.   you giggled, but yet again, niki cuddled like that only when he was really tired. he placed himself between your legs, his head resting on your stomach.   "you were listening to our songs?" he asked, finally noticing the song playing in the background. your fingers unconsciously travelled to his head, now slowly caressing his hair and sometimes gently scratching his scalp.   “mhm, i almost cried during bloosom; it’s such a beautiful song.”   "reminds me of you.” he whispered, the tone of his voice becoming sleepy.   you were confused, but then you remembered some parts of the song that you understood. niki thought you spoke some japanese, and it was enough. you smiled, wanting to kiss his forehead in response, but he was too far away. instead, you grabbed the blanket and covered his body.   "sleep riki. you worked hard; get some well-deserved sleep.” you whispered.   soon after niki really fell asleep, you watched his relaxed face and his breath becoming more consistent and slow. you didn’t know, but after a month of being on tour, he finally felt safe and comfortable. he was finally home. you were his home.

requests: open © 2023 — all rights reserved to user thejakeslayla, please do not steal, plagiarise or translate any of my work !

[hrts4hanniehae]

Take a Chance with Me || fourteen

*mostly written parts

remember to comment and reblog

it was quite obvious that yn and seungcheol would be invited to numerous interviews. and of course, they went to most of them.

"so who liked who first?"

"we first met when we were trainees because yn's younger brother and childhood friend were friends with our maknae, Dino. yn was a trainee under a different company and... was his name Jae? I'm sorry but my memory of him is very fuzzy. I believe Jae was a trainee with us until he dropped out due to health issues."

"so we knew each other from the start of our trainee days and I debuted the same year as them, so we were quite close, I would say. But I think I fell first."

"no, i definitely did."

the interviewer sat up in her seat. "really? why is that so?"

seungcheol grasped yn's hand. "it was in 2014 when we were meeting up together with the other 95 liners in Seventeen. yn was wearing this winter coat that made her so pretty. I fell instantly. you can ask jeonghan, he'd be more than happy to embarrass me."

this was news to yn, who couldn't help but smile. "so you did fall first."

"so when did you fall for him, yn-sshi."

"when i first saw him perform during one of his dance practices. his presence was so strong and i don't know... he was so attractive."

seungcheol flushed red.

yn was at svt's dorm, celebrating her rekindled relationship with seungcheol.

"finally you both are together again. after 3 long years."

"thanks to hoshi actually. he sped the process up by a lot."

"noona, we should do a weverse live right now."

"yea, we should."

their weverse live hit record-high views. the app almost crashed. everyone was so curious to see domestic, drunk yncheol.

"hi guys. yn is super drunk and is having a mini concert with hoshi." - mingyu

"they've sung "just do it" 15 times. someone please stop them." - scoups

"wait they're singing yn's album songs now." - joshua

"oh my god i don't want to hear a drunk version of Oceans and Engines..." - jun

"stop hoshi before he ruins Take a Chance with Me" - minghao

"no wait i want to hear this." - jeonghan

"now hoshi is crying..." - wonwoo

"jihoon-ahhhhhhhhh" - hoshi

"no hoshi..." - woozi

"why is yn still singing... now she's crying... scoups!" - seungkwan

"on it." - scoups

"i'm so sorry for this me-"

"HORANGHAE." - hoshi

"..." - svt

"mianhae" - minghao

"everything okay, yn?"

"yea. i finally feel like... i'm home."

he pulled her in for a kiss. "i'm glad you feel this way. maybe now you'll continue writing those good love songs about me?"

she laughed. "we'll see, cheol. but thank you for... taking a chance with me."

now he laughed. "was that supposed to be a joke?"

"no, i meant it. I love you."

"i love you too."

-fin-

a/n THANK YOU FOR FOLLOWING "TAKE A CHANCE WITH ME" AHHHH!!! my first ever smau and kinda long fic. omfg thank you for all the love on this. i'm so so grateful. stay tuned for chpt fifteen, the epilogue. i have something special planned. special thank you to those who always commented/reblogged my posts. yall have a special place in my heart!!!!

note to my taglist: please reblog and comment abt the chpt so i know that you're actually reading my stuff.

summary: 3 years after your breakup with seungcheol, you release an album to cope with your still-broken heart. you didn't expose his name but quickly, your fans and fans of svt begin to connect the dots to the past you wish you could relive. little did you know, the man you loved so desperately would begin to chase you back with the same desperation you so very much desired

inspired by: take a chance with me

pairing: idol!choi seungcheol × fem!idol!reader

genre: past relationship, fluff, angst, best friend!booseoksoon, smau, miscommunication, pining, 2nd chance

warnings: implied self harm/depression, hate comments, updates irregular but will finish because i cried when i thought abt this idea

started: 13.12.23

taglist: fill out the form in my pinned post to be added to the taglist (specify this smau in the pw section)

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tags! @fairyofhour @megseungmin @sun-daddy-yoriichi @woozixo @euphoric-univers @christinewithluv @haowonbins @ocyeanicc @asyre @cynthiaaax13 @superhoshisvt @bangantokchy @chimmy-bts @angelarin @daisawa @writingbarnes @jeonghansshitester

@belladaises @wonwootakemyheart @wonwooz1 @luchiet @atinybitlonely @kookssecret @caratsland @peachescreamandcrumble @thepoopdokyeomtouched @isabellah29 @leah-rose03 @coupskook

[f1letters]

bejeweled | ln4

"and I miss you, but I miss sparkling"

summary: after a triple-header where they couldn't see each other, things got even stranger when her boyfriend seemed totally uninterested in spending time with her. so, she took matters into her own hands

warning: a little bit of angst, but fluff ending, mentions of a long-distance relationship, Lando being an uninterested boyfriend, reader feeling ignored and worthless, reader being petty, mentions of alcohol, swearing, reader trying to make Lando jealous, mentions of McLaren's bad 2022 season and Danny leaving the team (crying 😭), not proofread

pairing: lando norris x reader

word count: 2.7k

note: everything in bold are song references and in italic are thoughts, which includes memories from the past.

masterlist

Baby love, I think I've been a little too kind

Didn't notice you walkin' all over my peace of mind

In the shoes I gave you as a present

Puttin' someone first only works when you're in their top five

And by the way, I'm goin' out tonight

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.'

Y/N couldn't keep count of the number of times she had heard this phrase being said during the past two years. 

She prayed that people were right. That distance would make their relationship stronger, their time together more special, their appreciation for each other bigger.

She hoped her heart would mend every time he came back home but in all honesty, she just felt... lonely.

From: babe

only a few more days and the torture is over, can't wait to kiss you again gorgeous, miss you 🧡

Y/N read Lando's text over and over again, daydreaming about their reunion after so long apart, as the driver had three races in a row at Spa, Zandvoort and Monza.

It didn't matter how many times Lando called or texted. How many times he expressed how much he missed her. How many times he said how excited he was to see her again.

In the end, it was exhausting spending her days simply waiting for him to be there.

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I could still say, "I don't remember"

Suddenly, the jingling of keys on the other side of the door caught her attention. Y/N turned towards the entrance where she saw the image of her boyfriend appear through the darkness of the night that filled the apartment.

Quickly getting back on her feet, the girl rushed to him, hugging the boy desperate to return to her arms. His body relaxed as soon as it made contact with hers and Lando let him pull her as close to him as possible.

"Fuck," Lando whispered against his girlfriend's forehead, whose tears of relief now streamed freely down her cheeks. "I can't believe I'm finally back home."

"God, I swear it was the worst weeks ever." The girl confessed, although it was common to be apart for a long time since her work did not allow her to follow him most of the time. "I've missed you so much, Lan. So much."

Grabbing her gently by the sides of her neck, the driver looked straight into her bright, tired eyes. "Me too, baby. But now we have two weeks to ourselves."

For a moment everything fell into place. But it was only a matter of time before it all came crashing down again.

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

After spending the night lying next to the boy she loved, Y/N couldn't control all the excitement she felt inside her chest.

Very early in the morning, the young woman got out of bed, leaving the sleeping man behind, and headed to the kitchen where she went all out to celebrate his first morning back in Monaco.

With the utmost care and love, she cooked just about everything: scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, pancakes, you name it. And as soon as everything was ready, Y/N returned to the room and jumped on top of the British man, now awake on his phone.

"Good morning, sunshine!" The girl said, as she hugged his hips and laid her head on his stomach. "I made the best breakfast ever just for you, baby. So you better be hungry." 

Her laughter was quickly interrupted by the boy's surprising coolness towards her. "Good morning, but I think I'll pass. I still feel super tired from the flight, so I'm going to stay in bed a little longer." Lando set his phone back on the bedside table and, running a hand over the top of her head as an act of apology, continued. "I hope you don't mind, love. It's just for today."

It's just for today, he said.

The next day, still under the wave of happiness, Y/N tried her luck again and decided to approach her boyfriend again to make plans, now that he was already feeling more energetic and recharged.

Lando spent the morning jumping around the house, so when Y/N saw him walk back into the room, she dropped to her knees in her seat, turned around and leaned on the back of the couch.

"Lan, what if we went out to dinner at that Thai place we went to last month?" She asked, her head turning slightly as she remembered their meal. "I swear I'm still thinking about that Pad Thai."

Lando continued his way to the kitchen, opening the fridge to get some water. "Hmm, maybe another time. Don't feel like going out."

And with only a few words, he disappeared again into another room of the house.

On day 3, the girl was caught off guard when she saw her boyfriend with a backpack on his back and his hand on the doorknob.

"Hey, where are you going?" She questioned, curious.

"Just going to the gym with Carlos." He replied, eyes on the phone in his other hand.

"I thought you were tired." She blurted out. At that moment, the persistent girl decided to be direct and confront him. "Is there something wrong? You've been so distant lately."

She had barely seen him even though the two of them shared the same house. It was getting embarrassing how much she tried to engage in conversation with him, only to get rejected every single time.

The driver just spat out a string of words, including 'busy with business' and 'training', but nothing soothed the uneasiness she felt in the pit of her stomach.

Baby boy, I think I've been too good of a girl

Did all the extra credit, then got graded on a curve

I think it's time to teach some lessons

I made you my world, have you heard?

I can reclaim the land

And I miss you

But I miss sparklin'

It just didn't make any sense.

What happened to the 'week to ourselves? To all the 'I miss you' and 'I can't wait to see you' he said?

It got to the point where she was even starting to question every time he told her he loved her.

A week passed, and in a last attempt, Y/N walked up to her boyfriend and placed her hands on his shoulders, placing a small kiss on his cheek.

"How about we watch a movie, cuddled a bit on the couch…?" She suggested, whispering close to his ear.

Lando placed a hand over one of his girlfriend's hands, looking back to meet her gaze. "Sorry babe, but I'm going to stream with the guys now. Maybe later."

Maybe another time. Maybe later.

She had been a little too kind and she was done playing nice.

It was time to teach him some lessons.

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I could still say, "I don't remember"

Y/N entered her room and confidently walked to her closet. She knew exactly the garment she was looking for and as soon as she laid eyes on her shiny bejeweled dress, she picked it up.

Leaving the clothes she wore behind on the floor, she changed into the stunning dress and sat in front of her mirror, curling her hair and doing her makeup.

Her eyes ended up dark and smoky, perfectly adorning the determined and vengeful look on her face.

Grabbing her small Prada bag, Y/N walked to the room where Lando was already streaming, catching the driver's attention.

"Hey, I'm already live." He warned her, as he turned to see his girlfriend. Laying his eyes on his girlfriend all dressed up, a nervous shiver ran down his spine. "Where are you going looking all polished up?"

"Don't wait for me for dinner," She answered coldly, even though she knew the people in the comments were going to have a field day with this. "And by the way, I'm going out tonight."

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

As soon as she walked into the room, she made the whole place stop with the shimmer of her dress under the spotlight.

If Lando wasn't going to give her the love and attention she deserved, she sure as hell was going to give it to herself.

Y/N was finally done with letting her worth be determined by a man, even if he was supposed to be the love of her life.

Sapphire tears on my face

Sadness became my whole sky

But some guy said my aura's moonstone

Just 'cause he was high

Walking towards the bar, the young woman couldn't help noticing the eyes that fell on the fascinating and beautiful image that she was.

At that moment, although she missed him and the good times of their relationship, she was reminded of how much she missed sparkling.

Y/N ordered two tequila shots and drank them without missing a second. She now felt prepared to start the night, leaving her problems behind.

Dancing as she made her way to the middle of the floor, the girl began to sway her hips to the music, between the hot bodies glued together in the room.

Tonight was all about her.

And we're dancin' all night

And you can try to change my mind

But you might have to wait in line

What's a girl gonna do?

A diamond's gotta shine

Back home, Lando couldn't shake the feeling of apprehension and anxiety that gripped him.

As much as he tried to keep his good spirits and attention on his friends, his followers and the game, his mind was elsewhere: her.

His eyes roamed the chat as he interacted with some of his fans until one of them made his heart stop beating for a second.

teamlandofewtrell: have you guys seen Y/N photos clubbing? I smell trouble in paradise lol

The man cleared his throat, trying to maintain his posture. "Guys, I have to go now, but I'll see you very soon!"

Without further explanation, Lando grabbed his coat and the keys to his McLaren and headed towards her.

And as soon as he entered the club, he immediately found her.

The furious boy walked over to her, grabbed her arm and pulled her to a more sheltered corner, only to find her surprised and upset eyes.

"What the fuck were you thinking?!" He shouted over the music, unconcerned by prying ears. "First you make me look like an idiot on stream, then I find out you're alone in a club doing who knows what. Are you all right in the head, Y/N?!"

"You're worried now, are you?" The girl laughed sarcastically. "That's fucking rich."

"You have to be fucking kidding me. It has to be." Lando ran his restless hands through his hair nervously. "All because I didn't want to see a movie with you today? That's it?"

"Today, of course. The problem is from today." She continued her ironic tone. "You know what, Lando? It's about time you realized that just because I made you my world doesn't mean I can't claim the land."

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I could still say, "I don't remember"

Lando was shocked by her confrontational words, as it was a side she rarely showed.

"Stop this nonsense, Y/N." Lando snapped, gripping her arm with some force. "Let's go home now, and tomorrow we'll talk when you come to your senses."

Out of nowhere, a man approached the couple. "Hey, is everything okay here? Do you need some help, babe?" He asked her.

Y/N recognized him as the vocalist of the band that was performing when she first arrived at the scene.

"It's okay, thanks." She replied, freeing her arm from her boyfriend's hold and letting her burning eyes lay on Lando's face. "This man was about to leave."

"If you need to come with me, feel free to join, gorgeous." The singer said, looking her up and down. "Do you have a man? 'Cause if you don't, I sure could be yours for tonight."

Even though she was uninterested in the man's suggestive proposition, she couldn't pass up an opportunity to entice the driver. "I don't remember."

"She has a fucking man, now get the fuck off." Lando spoke out aggressively, having no patience left for her foolishness.

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

"You have the nerve to show up here playing the role of the victim when all you did this whole week was ignore me," Y/N yelled, losing her mind. "Day after day, I made a fool of myself and tried to approach you, to make plans with you, to do the things I know you like to see if you would change your shitty attitude but nothing."

"From the second you arrived, the only thing I got from you was a cold shoulder and indifference. And honestly, I'm fed up, fed up with your behaviour when all I did was wait for you, all alone and miserable, while you fulfilled your dreams."

Lando remained glued to the ground, unable to move as he tried to assimilate all the angry words she spat in his direction.

"So if you have anything else to say to try and ruin my night, you might have to wait in line because I don't have the time to do so right now."

And we're dancin' all night

And you can try to change my mind

But you might have to wait in line

What's a girl gonna do? What's a girl gonna do?

I polish up nice

Eyes to the floor in embarrassment, the driver gently grabbed her hand. "You're right, I'm so sorry, love."

"What?" She blurted out, not believing the sudden change in him.

"You're right, I've been an absolute prick to you lately," The boy looked into her eyes, his gaze filled with regret and sorrow. "Those last three weeks weren't just bad because I was away from you. It was bad news after bad news and I just ended up taking it out on you unfairly."

"Lan, you know you can talk to me about anything." She softened and stroked his hand. "What's wrong?"

"Everything, honestly." He sighed, saddened. "The car is shit most of the time, I can't seem to get out of 7th place ever, Danny is leaving the team next season and, as if it couldn't get any worse, I spent all weekend getting asked about it like I had some power over the matter."

Y/N knew her partner was feeling especially down over losing yet again another teammate he really cared about, so Lando's anguish came as no surprise.

"I'm sorry, Y/N, really." Lando apologized again. "You didn't deserve all of this."

"Baby, I'm here for you. Always. Through thick and thin." Y/N brought her lips to his, letting her hands grip his curly hair as she leaned into his kiss. "Let's have some fun, dance a little, and make up for lost time, what do you think?"

"Lead the way, gorgeous." Lando kissed her again before she led him to the centre of the floor.

Gathered in their bubble of love again, Y/N, who once shone like a jewel, now shone like a true diamond with the light of her life reflecting on her side.

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

taglist: @dan3avocado @starxqt @roseinnej @spiidergirlsworld @ccloaned @hotpigeon22 @dr3lover @lovelytsunoda @primadonnasdream @luxebeautystyle @wallfloweriism @ilivefortheleague @gwynethhberdara @satellitelh @adavenus @audreyscodes @wifeoflucyboynton @th6ccnsp6cyy @classifiedsblog @flyingmushroomss @motylekrozi @claramllera @gabrielamaex @handsupforamiracle @pierre-gasssllyy @lorenaloveslewis

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(taglist continues in the comments)

thank you to everyone that asked to be tagged! please let me know if you want to be added to the next stories! 💌

[strrvnge]

This is a fic request, imagine dr strange x reader, he’s her dads best friend and they both have. A huge crush on each other for a very long time, he finally confesses in an agnsty way when she’s all I thought you cared about me, and it's a slow burn. THANK YOU I have been dreaming about this for nights 😭

I can't explain how much I love thisss!!! Also I'm sorry for taking so long to write this the last past months were kinda weird so... I hope you like this.

This is a bit different from your request, Stephen and reader are already secret dating

(note this request was my excuse to rewatch all too well, also Stephen's kinda an asshole in this)

So this is our table Stephen must be here any moment. Should we have a drink as we wait?"

Your father had been one of the best professors Columbia had ever seen, teaching there for over 20 years with numerous successful doctors being taught by him, one of them being Stephen Strange too.

In fact Stephen was one of your father’s all time favourite students and for a person as handful as your father that meant a lot. Since you were a teenager you could remember your father speaking of Stephen's accomplishments in family dinners, how great, how bright, how much potential he had. He was like the son he never had.

So even after he graduated due to his admiration for your father and your father's pride for him their relationship turned into a very strong friendship. And then you met him.

Of course both of you knew it was wrong. The age difference was one very obvious problem, the fact he went out for beers every friday with the father too but neither of you could deny the tension between you two.

So it started from shy smiles and lingering looks during dinners, to innocent touches in the little of your back and flirty remarks that to an outsider were just two friends teasing each other (the outsider being your father).

It was just flirting. What harm could it be? you thought

It was all innocent and fun until… it wasn't. The hand from the little of your back moved down to your waist, sometimes even turned into a soft squeeze. Nothing uncomfortable, yet nothing that was enough. You soon found yourself looking over your next illicit affair, dressing up in every dress and colour you knew complimented you, your heart ready to explode as you did so. You soon wanted more.

The problem was that you got it. Everything you asked for.

"Oh here he is" You quickly looked at the entrance of the restaurant and there he was. You couldn't help the little smile on your face. It had only been two days since you last saw him but you had already missed him. Always looking great and handsome and then she came in, took his hand and together approached your table.

"Happy birthday you old man!" Stephen hugged him "Sorry for being late. This is Dr Cristine Palmer"

"It's great to meet you,sir. Stephen has told me so much about you. I've read a lot of your work too. Big fan"

You knew she would come too. Your father said she was Stephen's date, Stephen said she was just a colleague. He needed a date for your father's birthday and "Christine is a very good friend that was available for the night. Nothing more" he had said and had kissed your forehead and you believed him.

"So Dr. Palmer, are you working a long time with Stephen?"

You could still feel his hand around you from your last get away weekend. His kisses down your neck, the hot sun in your face as you sat near the lake, the song you danced to in the kitchen could still be heard in the back of your head and if you focused hard enough you could still feel the overwhelming feeling you swore was love.

And despite that, she was sitting opposite of you. Bright like a rey of sunlight, successful, pretty, your father must already love her but most importantly so did Stephen. No matter how many times he denied it to you you couldn't shake off the feeling.

And there he was, sitting beside her, not ashamed or hiding his face. It made you wonder if that would ever be the case with you? If he would ever be as proud and happy to have you by his side,in restaurants and during walks, in family dinners and even in those dull charity events. Introduce you as something more than his friend’s daughter, as something more than a kid he had to drag along.

But then again perhaps things were better the way they were. A close and private relationship is always best even if they meant your friends and family don't even knowing, right?

Some boring conversations and introductions later the food had come and you sat quietly in your seat having lost all your appetite. No one had asked you a question in 45 minutes.

"So what are you studying?"

You looked at Christine quite confused as the whole table went silent waiting for your answer not having heard your voice for long time. You bit the inside of your cheek as Stephen took a sip of his drink and wrapped his hand around her shoulder looking at you too to speak.

As if he didnt know

And then he gave you a small smile

"I'm studying for a PhD in English Literature"

"Oh that's interesting"

"I had hundrwny different children become doctors but i couldn't get mine to do it’’ your father said with a bitter laugh yet loud enough for the whole table to hear his disappointment and you sighed.

"Technically you'll become a doctor too. Just the different kind one" Stephen smiled and Christine nodded sensing the tension.

She looked so pretty and relaxed it made you wonder if she knew what Stephen was doing last weekend, or perhaps for the past six months.

Actually he had developed quite a routine with you that sometimes had you asking yourself how no one had noticed your affair. Calling him every morning before your morning classes, sometimes even having lunch together, meeting you every friday night for your usual secret rendezvous on the other side of the city. You slept at his place, you ate at his place… it was only a couple weeks ago he was looking around apartments with you in New York, searching for somewhere nearby his place. It was only last weekend you ditched your friends for a little taste of him, a getaway weekend he planned just for the thrill of it. You had turned 25 in his arms for god’s sake.

.

"Well that was fun" Christine said to Stephen as you walked out of the restaurant.

Soon the dinner was over and while you tried hard not to overthink how comfortable another woman was with your boyfriend you were in a terrible mood.

"Yes it was" you looked over them and you almost wanted to throw up. You looked as she placed her hand on his shoulder, you looked as she kissed his cheek.

"Are you gonna head home, would you want me to call you a cab?" Your mother asked

"It's alright, I can walk her home" Stephen said and you looked up to him puzzled. "A friend of Christine is gonna pick her up so.."

"Thanks Stephen. Well goodnight" your father said and you started walking to your place.

"Your father was kinda harsh on you today" he finally spoke

"Isn't he always?" You murmured under your breath, your eyes pinned on each of your steps not daring to meet up with his eyes.

"Someone's moody"he said playfully trying to lighten up the mood.

You snapped yourself out of your thoughts and turned to look at him for the first time.

Noticing the sadness on your face he halted, wrapping his hand around your waist to turn you around before quickly realising what he did and let you go. Biting your tongue to hold back the tears you looked at him, the look of betrayal and sadness all over your face.

"What's wrong baby?"

Your stomach felt like a knot, tying your insides so tightly you wanted to cry. You knew you probably just played around and it wasn't anything serious for you to be jealous but honestly you didn't know why it hurted so much watching him with another woman. You just couldn't take it.

"You can tell me" He talked sweetly and the concern in his voice almost made you smile. Sure he kissed her but it was you he walked home, your place he spent the nights to, it was you he cared about. And perhaps it didn't have to be official to make it real, perhaps being a secret made it even more special. Right?

Smiling you stepped closer, shortening the distance between you, before pulling him from the collar and kissed him deeply.,

In the end it didn't matter how many women he took out to dinners if he came back to you at night. He was yours.

"Y/N" he laughed uneasily, taking a step back, breaking the kiss.

"What?"You smiled, still a bit fuzzy from the kiss. He looked at you trying to find the right words before finally saying

"I think it might rain. We should walk a little bit faster," he said and started walking as if nothing had happened. Confused, you looked as he walked away, not understanding what had just happened.

"Y/N?" He called your name, noticing you had stood behind.

"I just kissed you and you talk about rain?" You said and he just stared at you waiting for you to quit it and start walking with him.

Instead you stood at your place stubbornly not moving an inch till he answered you. Taking a deep breath he took a few steps closer to you.

"Not in the street, there are people watching" he whispered as if he was talking about something bad.

"Well people we don't know"you said, firmly staying at your place, puzzled by his unusual behaviour.

Biting his inner lip, as he always did when stressed, he looked around quietly, not daring to look at you.

"say something"

"Come on dont do this"

"Do what? You are the one who doesn't want to kiss me"

"What do you want me to say?" He said angrily "I don't want people to see me making out with a kid Y/N. I have a career"

"A kid?"you laughed, looking at him with wide eyes, not believing what you had just heard. "A kid?" You repeated shocked "Was that what I am for you?" You asked, a sudden feeling of anger and betrayal creeping over you.

"Come on dont act like this. Let's go home" he sighed trying hard to avoid picking up a fight with you.

"No!" You exclaimed, taking a step back.

No you weren't going anywhere. How could he say such a thing? After you've been through together you were everything but a kid. "Why don't you want to kiss me? You kissed her"

"Christine is different" he said and then instantly regretted his words.

"Yes she is. Because she's supposed to be a friend whereas I-"

"You what?" He snapped, slowly getting tired of your act "What are you?" You stared at him in shock, your eyes welling up.

"Fuck" he muttered running his hand through his hair. He took a deep breath before sweetly taking your face into his hands.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" he apologised, kissing your head but you flinched away. "Of course I want to kiss you. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry"

"How could you say that?" You asked with a bitter laugh.

"I'm sorry" he said again but it wasn't enough. You hated how that made you feel. You weren't crazy, he didn't want to kiss you and you had to know why.

"I'm not a kid Stephen" you said now more serious, taking a step back to look at him.

"I know"

"Then why wont you kiss me?"

"Fuck Y/N why you have to do this!" He exclaimed and but you just stared at him.

"You kissed her" you murmured

"Don't get me wrong you're sweet and beautiful but none of this was serious and you know it" he said, his voice now low and gentle as if he was trying to explain something to a child. And perhaps he was, because you stared at him wide eyed trying to grasp each of his words, yet everything he said sounded so foreign in your ears.

"No I don't. We never talked about it, for me to know"

"We didn't talk about it because there wasn't anything to talk about." He explained, still not understanding why you were acting like that, his ignorance making you even more angry. "We both know it was -"

"What?! A one time thing?" You cut him off, defensively crossing your arms over your chest "Well don't get me wrong but it was more than one time Stephen"

You couldn't believe he thought of you as a child.

"This was never serious and you know it. Actually it's not just not serious it's wrong too" he finally said and you could swear your heart skipped a beat.

You took a couple steps back, looking anywhere but him, trying to hold back your tears.

"Perhaps if you were older" he said trying to soothe you but you just stayed silent.

"Do you like her?" You broke the silence and even in a city as alive as New York your words couldn't be more loud.

You didn't want him to answer that, too afraid of the answer. Yet you knew, somewhat hoped he would say just the thing you didn't want to hear.

"Y/N" his inability to look you in the eyes was enough of an answer.

"Do you like her, Stephen? Is that why you say this?"

"What no! Stop looking outside for the problem-"

"Oh you can say it. Say I'm the problem but don't deny that you love her"

"Love her?! Are you listening to yourself? We've just fucked a couple time, thats it" he said defensevily

"No Stephen no it's not just fucking. It's messages in the middle of the night, calls, parties, she is involved in every aspect of your life. And the worst thing isn't that you allow it, it's that you like it" you said now starting to get angry

"She's my friend and coworker"

"She's everywhere. Everywhere in your life and I'm nowhere"

"This is exactly why this can't work. You're so immature and needy"

"Why am I wrong? Where am I in your life? Who knows about me except for you? What the hell" you exclaimed looking at the other side.

"What the hell" you repeated now talking more to yourself.

You couldn't believe it after everything you've been through, everything you've done for him, all the lying to everyone you knew, the secrets you kept for him. How he let you all those months love and care for him, when he made you feel so special and sacred. What a fool you were.

"This is embarrassing" he said and you turned around and glared at him.

"You're so cruel Stephen. So cruel" you spat "I don't want to see you ever again"

[karereiko]

Morimu week 2024

Day 3 - OP3

I was thinking what to draw for op3 day, I love so many scenes it's hard to choose and I didn't draw those before morimu week started, wanted to do more but I'm at end of my battery. So here is Op3 add-lib, first I was thinking of Louis knife one but it deserves few panels that aren't drawn in hurry. I remember when I first saw kiss addlib, I knew op3 1st switch live, so during DVD version watching I waited for kaze fukus scene and all... and hell, William sings his "I fell in love" song but I was crying from laughter, because of this addlib. Op3 is still fun/happy part, Jack the ripper arc is so great, they made even Yard part so dynamic and exciting too, and of course Durham date, it's so sweet, happy sherliam in love is the air I need to breath. I listen to so many op3 songs, most favs there Milverton entry is great, he is pure evil and dangerous, you feel he's going to be a problem to our heroes, corrupted parts of Yard were nicely done too. The ending song is so love song of William and Sherlock: so many emotions in their voices, lyric and with whole reaching out...

I'm so tired, probably will take break tomorrow and do op4 and op5 stuff one day later....

[hobaworld7]

MYG - Insecurities (TW) (M)

Pairing : reader x idol/yoongi

tw: mention of eat!ng dis0rder, body dysmorphia, weight and insecurities about reader's body, like b!g or feeling not enough. there is also a lot of fluff.

PLEASE : don't read if you are underage or are struggling with ed because this could be triggering*

I feel like i'm in the right place to write about that, i've been medically diagnosed with anor3x!@ and went to many therapies for my ed. so please be comfortable to get help if you struggle or you can always talk to me, my dm are open!

a/n: I wanted to write this one since a while, so here i am a 10pm when i have to wake up at 5am tomorrow, but hope you'll enjoy and please comment some request!

disclaimer : BTS or Suga doesn't belong to me. The scenario does. Remember that it's only an imagine. I also took some of his quote about body positivity because it fits with the story. I'll put them in italic, so you know that they are not mine.

LISTEN TO THIS SONG IF YOU NEED A REMINDER OF HOW BEAUTIFUL YOU ARE!

________

You've been struggling a lot lately. One year ago you were diagnosed with an eating disorder. You've went to therapy and since have been follow by a psychologist and your doctor. It was doing well, you've improved a lot but you were still feeling fragile. A little thing could be triggering enough to put you in some bad habits again. Summer was coming and even if your psy kept telling you to love your body that it does so much for you, just the thought of wearing and seeing yourself in short or crop top in front of people make you sick.

Here you were, in front of your full size mirror. You've tried at least 6 outfits. Nothing was okay. Your thighs were a little too big and you didn't like the way your arms fit in all of your tops. At this point, your bedroom was a mess and you were at the breaking point. You got out of your clothes, put on one of your boyfriend's hoodie and decided to call him.

-Y/N, is everything all right? I'm waiting for you at the studio.

-Yoongi, nothing looks good on me. I feel fat and ugly. I don't have anything to wear. I tried 6 outfits. I just can't get out of the house today, sorry my love...

-Babe, put anything that feel comfortable and come to the studio please. Take that long sleeve of mine that you love seeing me in. Wear it. You would look beautiful, as always, in it.

-Yoonie, I really don't feel like going out...

-Please jagiya, I'll wait for you now.

He hung up before you could say anything. He knows it was the only way to make you go out of your apartment. You went to his wardrobe, grab the long sleeve he was talking about and some legging too. You put your favorite white adidas shoes and some sunglasses before heading out. You were feeling shitty but you know you had to go see your boyfriend to feel better. He had a whole pm planned for both of you. You took the bus to his studio.

_ _ _

-Babe I'm here!

You knock slowly on the door and open it after hearing him telling you to come in. It was a little studio with all his instruments, some screens and a couch so he could rest during the busy days. You always love coming here when he was working on his album.

You hear him talking over the phone so you decided to get cozy and find your favorite spot on the couch under a blanket. You were scrolling on TikTok when Yoongi decide to come lay on you like a big bay, his head resting against your chest.

-Hello beautiful baby girl. What do you wanna eat?

-I don't feel like eating...

You wrap your arms around your belly. It was a bad day.

-I know, but you still have to take a bit or two. Now please, tell me what you wanna eat?

-I don't know, some ramen would be good?

-Perfect babe, i'll order something.

He kisses your forehead and go order food. You were a little hungry actually. But the eating disorder was like controlling your thoughts and after that body-hate morning, you didn't feel like you could eat. Like you were punishing yourself.

But Yoongi was amazing and understood how you were feeling. That's why he was forcing you to eat and get out of your apartment. He wanted you near him so he could watch over you because it was a bad day.

____

After you ate and he did all the work he had to do for the day, you both went home. You were feeling a little bit better. Once you arrive at your place, Yoongi went to the dressing to get changes and you went in the kitchen so you could grab something to drink.

-Babe! Y/N! Come here please.

You hears Yoongi scream from the dressing room. You let your coffee on the counter and went to the walk-in. When you open the door, you saw that he cleaned all your mess of the morning and took off the sheet that was covering the mirror. It was a full length one and he put on the sheet a week or two ago when you told him you felt ugly this day.

-Come here baby.

He reaches out for your hand. You take his hand and he slowly drag you near him. He put his hands on your shoulder and turn you around so you are facing the mirror.

-Baby, please not today..

You put your hands around your body.

-Please, let me do something okay?

You mumble as an answer. You knew he was stubborn so if you let him do what he wanted to do, it would be easier then try to leave right now.

-You are so beautiful baby.

He puts his hand on your hip and slowly pull up your hoodie.

-Raise your arm baby.

You slowly do as he said and he then slowly undress you. You were now only in your bras and legging. You rapidly put your arms around your body and turn to face him.

-Please babe, can I leave now?

Yoongi put his hands on your cheek and lift up your face toward him.

-Trust me with that okay baby? You are so beautiful and I love you so much. I just want you to know. I wanna tell you over and over again how perfect you are. Now turn around and look at yourself in the mirror, please.

You turn around slowly and he put his index under your chin and lift up your face so you can see your reflection. He cover your neck of kisses and put his hands back on your hips.

-Look at that beautiful body. He's so precious.

He take off his shirt and trow it away. Then his hands are on your hip and his lips on yours. As he kisses you, he undress you of your legging.

-I don't want you to loose weight. Just imagine, one gram of your beautifulness leaving your body. I wouldn't be able to live.

He goes sit on the couch that decorate the corner of the room. He take your hands and once he's comfortably sit, pull it so you can sit on him, facing the mirror. He start kissing your neck and shoulder. His hands touching every parts of your exposed skin. His mouth was devouring your skin. Your eyes close, just taking all this sweetness and pleasure in.

-Open your eyes baby. Look how beautiful you are.

You start feeling his lips, sucking and gently bitting your skin. Probably leaving marks all over your body like he loves to do. You didn't really mind, honestly. Yoongi loved it so much, seeing his passages on you so it kinda turned you on.

-You are so pretty baby. Look at your body. Reacting so much under my touch.

Both of his hands were touching your body and you were shaking under his touch.

-Y/N, I love you so much. You are so amazing. You are so beautiful. Please never think you aren't enough or not pretty enough. You're a piece of art.

___

If you want to read more, here is the link of my masterlist : https://www.tumblr.com/kimtaehyung-taetae-writing/710423978560421888/masterlist?source=sharethank you army!

[le-velo-pour-dru]

How was the concert?? Tell me everything!

OH MY GOSH OKAY OKAY OKAY SO. IT WAS AMAZING :D ❤️

So before the concert started and everyone was waiting in line, I got to meet the AMAZING @mayathexpsychic and @acaesic in-person!! :D 💖 It was amazing, they're both such sweet and cool individuals, and I had so much fun chatting and hanging out with them before the show. It definitely made the wait a lot easier and a lot more fun!! ^^ 💖

When we finally got into the venue, after some waiting, we got to see the opening act, Sego!! I didn't really know what to expect, cause I hadn't heard of them, but oh my gosh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They were AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🤩❤️ They were so good!! 😁❤️ I'm definitely gonna have to look into their music, I enjoyed their set a lot ^^ 🫶

After that. oh my god. The wait for Dallon to come out was EXCRUCIATINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG IT FELT LIKE IT TOOK FOREVER XD I never knew what to expect when one of the songs that was playing faded out, or when someone walked onto the stage only to be one of the people helping to set up. IT WAS LIKE TORTURE, I NEVER KNEW WHEN HE WOULD COME OUT AND IT FELT LIKE SUCH A LONG TIME X'D 💔

BUT WHEN HE FINALLY CAME OUT. OMG. HE COMMANDED THAT STAGE. THE SHEER POWER AND CONFIDENCE HE EXUDED WAS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING AS HE CONTROLLED OUR CHEERS WITH HIS HANDS. Also. HE LOOKED SO AMAZING???????????????????? HIS HAIR WAS SO PRETTYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY AND HE LOOKED AMAZING IN THAT SUIT. NOT TO MENTION THAT. HE IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PERSON I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE 🫢💘 LIKE. HE IS STUNNINGLY PRETTY. HE'S SO GORGEOUS FHXGVKFHXCGJHCXJCGFXJHCGGJXCCJVJCJCJCVC ☺️💘 AND WHEN HE TOOK OFF HIS SUIT JACKET AND STARTED ROLLING UP THE SLEEVES OF HIS SHIRT OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY 🤭💞 The moment that he first walked onstage to the first few songs are kind of a blur to me, cause I was. ABSOLUTELY LOSING MY MIND XD I WAS GOING ABSOLUTELY FERAL CAUSE THE REAL DALLON JAMES WEEKES WAS RIGHT. THERE. OH MY GOD XD ❤️ So yeah I don't really remember them cause I was losing my MIND over him during them 🤭💖

As for how the concert worked, things have kinda changed!! For one, Dallon did a lot less bass playing and a lot more moving around the stage as he sang. Mad IQs used to be special cause he ditched the bass and was just a lead singer for a while, but he did that for maybe half the songs of the concert!! And I'm not complaining at all, Dallon is very fun to watch as he moves around onstage, he has a lot of fun with it and is just very full of energy and charisma!! It's a welcome change in my opinion :) 💖 As for the backing musicians, things have changed too!! Anthony is still his touring guitarist, but there's a new musician too who. I wasn't sure if he was playing guitar or bass or both, but his name was Isaac Paul. There's also a new drummer too, whose name is Ronnie Strauss! Dallon didn't really talk about Ryan during the concert, which I think was a tasteful decision on his part, BUT. HE DID MENTION HIM ONCE 🤭 As he was introducing the musicians, he said, "Turns out you can afford more people when you aren't being stolen from." WHICH WAS SO ICONIC. OMG. IF YOU'RE GONNA BRING HIM UP, WHAT A WAY TO DO IT X3 ❤️ IT WAS SO FUNNY HFXJGCHXFXCGJXFCJGJGXGJCVXVJJGXGJCGJCVJCGJC 🤭

And can I just say, I love Dallon's charisma onstage!! He would talk in between songs, and every time, he was just so charming and personable, it was a lot of fun!! :) ❤️ He's so good at connecting with the crowd, I loved hearing everything he had to say ^^ ❤️ A couple of highlights include:

He asked us if we all had good Christmases, and when we cheered, he said, "Well, that's neat!" in the GOOFUEST voice. It was so silly X3 ❤️

Before Kiss Goodnight, he talked about having fallen in love with Breezy years ago and still being in love with her to this day, and he shared that they did, in fact, kiss goodnight that night. It was really sweet 😊💖

He said that that night, we were all his date, and he was our date (if we're into that sort of thing), which. MADE ME BLUSH AND GIGGLE AND KICK MY FEET A LITTLE HEHEHEHE ☺️🩷 I WISH I COULD BE HIS DATE XFHGJJFXJGCXVJJCVVCJJCVCBJ 🤭💖

Before Choke, he gave a whole heartfelt speech about how much it meant to him that people came to see the show, and how amazing it is that the one thing unifying a room full of strangers is the music that they enjoy, and he finished it with, "Now, if you don't mind, choke yourself to sleep". IT WAS SO FUNNY FHXGJCHJCGXFJGJCXCJGJCCGJBC, HE'S SO AWESOME 🤭❤️

Anyway, moving onto something else: I don't tend to sing along with the songs during a concert, I prefer to just listen to how they're being performed. So while I didn't sing along with most of the songs, I had a lot of fun participating during the parts where he wanted the crowd to sing, like Social Climb and A Letter!! But the absolute peak crowd participation moment HAD to be Visitation of the Ghost!! 🤩💖 From where I was standing, it was pretty hard to see him during the crowd walk... BUT STILL!! I CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT TO EXPERIENCE A CROWD WALK LIVE OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG 🤭💖 That song overall is just. absolutely amazing to see live, it was a incredible experience and one of the best parts of the night!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🤩❤️

AND. OK. I REFUSE TO SAY MUCH ABOUT DOWNSIDE, BUT. I LOVED IT SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH 😁💖 I couldn't really understand what he was saying, but the vibes of the song were sooooooooooooooooo fun and I can't wait to finally hear it on the album!! 😄🩷 Speaking of which, he said a different Gloom Division song will be coming out in two weeks, and I can't wait to find out which one it is!! Maybe it'll be Kiss and Tell, he used that phrase during the concert, so. maybe that was a hint :o ❤️ That's just a guess though, idk what to expect X3

Anyway. It was an absolutely incredible experience!! :3 💖 Dallon is an absolutely phenomenal performer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😄🫶❤️ He's an incredible musician, he has a beautiful voice, and he has so much amazing energy and charisma up on that stage 😁🩷 It was incredible seeing one of my favorite musicians perform live right in front of me, I had so much fun, and I'm so grateful I got the opportunity to go see him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🤩💖 I had such an amazing time and I can't wait to see him again in April!! ^^ ❤️🫶

[this-daydream-is-dangerous-13]

Mega Question…? Analysis:

« I remember » - OOTW reference

« Good girl, sad boy/Big city, wrong choices » - « white t shirt, good girl faith, James Dean look » (Style reference)

« We had one thing going on/I swear that it was something » - « we were something don’t you think so » (the 1 reference)

« ‘Cause I don’t remember who I was before you/Painted all my nights/A color I’ve searched for since » - « we were in screaming color//you showed me colors I can’t see with anyone else » (ootw + illicit affair reference)

« But one thing after another/Lost in situations, circumstances/Miscommunications » - « and I, lost you » (maroon reference)

<< this is her giving the thoughts on their past relationship>>

« Have to say/By the way/I just may like some explanations » - this is her now in the present asking for context

« Can I ask you a question?/Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room/And every single one of your friends was/Making fun of you/But 15 seconds later they were clapping too?/Then what did you do? » - « if one thing had been different, would everything be different today/rosé flowing with you chosen family/throwing pennies in the pool » (the 1 reference that signifies her trifes with the relationship that get referenced by specific occasions with others in presence »

« Did you leave her house in the middle of the night?/Did you wish you'd put up more of a fight/When she said it was too much? » - « you pick me up no headlight » (style reference) « it’s 2 am in your car/ headlights pass the window » (iwyw reference) + a metaphoric reference to if he showed up at her door like in betty

« Do you wish you could still touch ...her?/It's just a question » - this is her being snarky and asking if he still yearns for her after (probably) listening to keep driving and little freak and all of harry’s house

« Half-moon eyes, bad surprise/Did you realize, out of time/She was on your mind/With some meathead guy/That you saw that night/But you were on something/It was one drink after another » - reference to the BBMAs night in 2015 a la woman + exile

« Caught in politics and gender-roles/And you're not sure and I don't know/Got swept away in the gray » - this means how both of them got silent with each other because of things like 2016 elections, expectations from society, new relationships blah blah

« I just may like to have a conversation/Can I ask you a question? » - once again a tie in to her present state

“Include repeat of chorus”

« Does it feel like everything's just like second-best after that/Meteor strike?/And what's that, that I heard, that you're still with her/That's nice, I'm sure that's what's suitable/And right/But tonight… » - this is in reference to knowing he’s with Olivia and seeing them be together for longer than haylor (at least publically) makes her insecure in a sense that she thought she’d be his only ONE; « I hope she makes a beautiful fool, who takes my spot next to you » (happiness reference); « I’m sure that you got a wife out there » (rwylm reference)

“Another repeat of chorus”

Interestingly, the song is 3:30 long, which could be a reference to her being close to 33 when she released it….

Also, she sang it on May 20, the anniversary of Harry’s House, and dubbed it as being during a happy moment.

Anon - I have been sitting on this for ages, waiting until we got closer to the song’s anniversary to post. Thank you for your patience AND this analysis!

I have a couple things to add and a view or two that diverges but otherwise: spot on!

I think “sad boy” because he was wildly misunderstood. He had this image as a charming, British lothario and it was untrue and stifling. As we have seen over time, he is a kind, generous, loyal person who feels things deeply and is happiest even with/part of a family.

That “friends making fun of you/15 seconds later they were clapping too” line? Made me call into question Champagne Problems with the “no crowd of friends applauded” line. Ooof.

The politics and gender roles arguments? I think some had to do with her being called a sl*t and the “Madonna/whore” way she was being presented in the media (the dating too much and break up song narrative) , while he was lauded for being linked to a bunch of different women. Which—I don’t think he wanted to do, if I’m honest. He’d rather have been with her. But yeah - I don’t think 18-20 year old H fully understood the misogyny she was facing.

That bridge. Ooooof. The whole song is ambiguous enough that she could say “I wrote it about the past” but also make people wonder if it’s that’s true. She built in plausible deniability, but it’s flimsy. And she made sure we could tell its subject. I am going to go into this in another post…

But this is amazing. TYSM

[mp3minded]

Ozzy: My Analysis.

This was a long time coming, because from the very first time I played his route (which also happened to be the first I completed the season to the end with), I knew Ozzy was a fundamentally interesting character that I'd want to dedicate a whole essay for, because it's one way I like to show my affection for these characters 🥺

(Problem was, I felt like I wouldn't of been able to do him justice before, but after my final research run, I don't think that's a road block for me anymore.)

One thing about his route is, no matter how you approach it, there'll always be a level of pain to it. I think the only exception to this is if you tell him, in paraphrase, "I'm interested too, but I'm not ready to commit yet," when he confesses to MC after the Doghouse Challenge, because that option allows MC the best of both worlds.. those two worlds I've experienced first-hand, I'll detail below.

If you tell him "I feel the same way," that day, it'll be held in the back of his mind that, at-least some point in time, he was your #1 choice (even if you end up choosing someone else in the end)

The pain waiting for MC on this path is, of course, how directly affected she is by everything that happened after her shock fake-dumping. (I even liveblogged my reaction to a lot of it, when I consciously paid attention to everything happening outside of Ozzy and MC's bond, within my #my exp tag, early March.)

Him patching things up with Grace, which she revealed to MC during Casa Amor

What he did during Casa, in reaction to seeing MC again in the postcards, (which didn't paint her in a positive light), which was a skinny-dip threeway kiss (which he IMMEDIATELY regretted)

Not breaking things off with Grace as soon as he should've after Casa (in my opinion), which I think should've been that first morning when all the OGs woke up together in the villa again, at the latest

And, on the topic of the Casa drama.. one moment I really like is, even if MC chooses to "play dumb," when piecing together what likely happened.. Ozzy couldn't keep her in the dark for too long even when he first considered it, which to me is so cute 🥺💗

@operationnope brought up some very good points when I asked her opinion on the situation. Being reminded of a very core part of Ozzy's character amidst the hurt was just what I needed 🥴 even if he fumbles along the way, he still wants to do right by all of the involved parties, and that includes Grace.

And, that leads me to what my final research run was all about.. seeing what his route is like when you friendzone him instead, before Casa. And, holy hell. I thought it would've been easy enough, but that came with its own unique set of challenges.

@ariendiel I remember at one point just thinking, "this is probably the closest to the Noah route experience I'll ever feel," and I know y'all Noah stans had it even tougher because there was no way to even couple up with Noah at all, outside of the disaster recoupling 😭 y'all don't get enough credit for REAL 🥺💙

It was a very isolating path, where even Ozzy flips back and forth between acknowledging MC's interest in him after all, with her actions, to "I'm friendzoned" mode. Everyone else, including Grace, just brushes off everything MC does, with the clear exception of the final recoupling.

And that all applies even after I told Grace that it could become a thing still, him and MC together 💀

On the one hand, yes I can sympathize with Ozzy's position in this scenario. But also it's like, Ozzy.. read the room! 😭🥺

Or, alternatively...

...from what I can tell from this difference of his dialog after the final recoupling.. he was reading the room, and was just trying to play it very cool with MC.

So, what is the overarching theme with Ozzy no matter how you approach his route? *checks the melted inked note on my arm* ..something about not knowing how to handle being in love for the first time, with the very real possibility of (total) rejection.

And, this song sums up his route to a T 🥺 and y'know what, maybe I did feel myself fall for him all over again as I was listening to it, on this last run 😭

[darthgloris]

SNAP (Alicia Sierra x fem!reader)

A/N: I got this really cute idea for an Alicia Sierra fic and I just can't get it out of my head so I have to start writing it or I won't be at peace-

Song: SNAP - Rosa Linn (the three dots will be in red when you should start the song)

Warnings: childbirth, violence, heartbreak, fluff, SPOILERS

Summary: During the Bank of Spain heist, Y/N a.k.a. Varsòvia sees her ex-girlfriend Alicia Sierra again and the heartbreak comes back to her.

Pairing(s): Alicia Sierra x reader, Palermo x reader (platonic)

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I got into the heist game for the second time with the idea that it was going to be clean: get in, get the gold, get out, saving Rio in the process. No casualties, no personal feelings, no strings attached.

Boy, was I wrong.

I was good friends with Palermo, he was fun and easy to talk to. We didn't have much in common until one subject came up: gay woes. It was quick to figure out each other's sexualities, I could see the way he'd look at Berlín and he noticed how I'd make eyes at Rio or Nairobi every once in a while. The real emotional connection came when we shared our most painful moments.

...

"Palermo", I called his name and sat next to him, my legs dangling over the brick wall he was sitting on. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, Varsòvia, I'm fine." He replied, hoping that I would drop it, but I could see the hurt behind his eyes.

"No, you're not fine, cariño. I can hear you at night, screaming and crying and drinking yourself numb. That's not 'fine'." I argued, although trying not to force him.

"Okay, señora Holmes, I'm not fine." He replied mockingly.

"Tell me what's going on." I rested my hand on his and gave him a comforting smile.

He let out a sad sigh and waited a few moments before speaking. "Before Berlín left for the first heist, he confronted me about my feelings for him. He said that he loved me too, that we were 99% soulmates, but he refused to get together. I asked him what was 1% against 99, and he still told me no. I pushed him a bit to try it and we kissed. Then he pushed me against the wall and kissed me again, but when he pulled away he broke my heart, put his hat on and left. I was leaning on the wall, crying, and I just couldn’t take it. I couldn’t take the pain. I cried all my tears out, screamed, drank, and fell asleep. It was a vicious cycle that continued for months, that still goes on."

I gave him a side hug and he rested his head on my shoulder. "I'm so sorry, honey. I really am."

"Thanks. You know, you're a really good listener," he pointed out.

"Well, I don’t talk much, so," I replied.

"And what about you? What was your worst heartbreak?" He asked.

I bit my lip as I remembered the most painful breakup of my life. How I'd cry myself to sleep, hoping she'd come back to me. I wondered how she was now, what kind of life she was leading; I desperately wanted to know if she was happy, if she got what she was looking for that she didn't find in me, if she got what she deserved.

"Alicia Sierra. She was everything I wasn't: loud, confident, dominating. On the outside, she seemed like a real son of a bitch, but when we were alone she'd turn into the sweetest thing."

"Was she pretty?"

"Oh, she was the eight wonder of the world," I smiled softly. "Long red hair, pale skin, freckles, beautiful smile, green eyes... you'd look in those eyes and fall under her spell. She was the doe that was more cunning than the fox itself."

"What happened?"

"June 22nd, 2015. She broke up with me, she didn't even give an explanation. You have no idea of how much I loved her, Palermo. She was the most important thing in my life, I treated her as if she was made of glass, I gave her my beating heart on a platter and she just... threw it away. I stopped eating and drinking for days, I couldn’t sleep, it was as if time was passing by and I was still blocked in that moment." I swallowed the lump in my throat and I felt Palermo's hand rubbing circles on my back.

...

When I found out that the leading inspector was Alicia, I was so shocked I could barely even speak. After all those years of longing for the doe-eyed beauty, I found myself having to be on her opposite side, shooting her men, deceiving her boss, playing against her. And pregnant, no less.

I had looked through the window that day, where she gazed up at me with her twinkling eyes and tantalising soft smile which never failed to weaken my knees. I had found it in myself to smile back, tearing up slightly. I turned away from the window so that she wouldn't see.

God, how I missed her. And she looked so beautiful, all dolled up. She really was the eighth wonder of the world, the fucking Princess Diana of the 2020's. How stupid I was for letting her go, for letting her leave with no explanation. If only I had known, I would have hugged her and never let her go; I would have kissed her until my lungs were on the brink of giving out.

They say that you never stop loving someone, no matter how bad they hurt you. That the strong feelings you have for a person are destined to fade over time, but never to pass entirely.

I thought I had gotten over Alicia years ago, that she didn't matter to me anymore, that I had moved on. The truth was that my feelings for her had faded, but not disappeared, as our "encounter" had demonstrated. When I closed my eyes I could still picture her arms around my waist as we watched a movie cuddled up on the couch. Alicia had hurt me, she had ripped my heart out with no explanation, and that was unforgivable, but now it didn’t matter: she was right under my nose once again. Overworked, pregnant and widowed.

I didn’t just want her back, I needed her back, and I needed her now.

...

Banco de España - current day

"I told you I'd kill you."

The single shot boomed through the room and Nairobi dropped to the ground with a bullet wound on her forehead.

"NAIROBI!" I yelled and ran over to her. My vision clouded with tears and I clutched her to me while she bled out. I sobbed and sobbed, hurting my throat, but that was the last of my concerns.

Nairobi was gone, and so were the last bits of hope I still had.

"Nairobi..." I whined. "I'm sorry, sweetness... I-I promised... I promised you I'd keep you safe, I'd keep you alive and I failed you..."

Palermo had to pry me off her to take her away. I tried to get out of his strong grip but failed, until I stopped fighting and let him hug me. He squeezed me tightly to his chest and started crying as well.

"I'm going to kill Gandìa... I'm going to find the bastard and fucking gut him... that's a promise I intend to keep..." I said, the tremble in my voice betraying my words. Palermo held me tighter and stroked my head in an attempt to comfort me.

"I know, cariño, I know, shh... I'm here, I'm here..." He shushed soothingly.

"Gandìa, hijo de la gran puta!"

...

The moonlight passed through the hole the sniper bullet created when Nairobi was shot.

I checked my watch: it read 4:00 a.m. As I looked through the window I tried to picture Alicia standing there, smiling up at me just like she used to when we were together; those were a few of the best years of my life. I remembered how I used to comfort her after she had a nightmare, when I wrapped my arms around her waist and combed through her fringe with my fingers to calm her as she nuzzled into my neck.

Months after the breakup, I'd tell my friends and family about it and they'd just reply with "just let her go", or "she wasn't good enough for you", or even "move on, just snap your fingers". I knew that all I needed was time, but they couldn't understand that, they couldn't understand that Alicia was the love of my life, that she was probably the only person that I could say that about.

I tried what they told me: I snapped my fingers once, twice; nothing. She was still in my heart, and there was nothing I could do about it. Three, four times: I thought I didn’t need her anymore, but she wasn't going to stop meaning something to me any sooner.

I bit my lip as I looked at the police tent and thought about the pain I went through. Countless of hours in the rain, as if freezing myself to the bone would have changed anything. I didn’t want that to happen again, but maybe it didn't have to: if I could just figure out why she left me I could work on it.

And right then and there, a single idea occupied my mind.

A crazy one.

I found a rope in the room and used it to slowly and silently drop myself out of the bank. I started taking long, fast steps towards the tent, when the reality switch turned: I was a robber and Alicia was the inspector, there was no point in her being happy to see me again if she was forced to arrest me immediately.

So I turned away from the Bank and walked in the direction that would take me to the stormwater tank.

...

A few days later

My rain boots splashed through the water on the floor of the stormwater tank as I took quick steps towards the door, excited to see the Professor again. I opened the door slowly and stepped inside. Behind the entrance, a gun cocked. "Jaque mate, hijo de puta," I heard and my breathing quickened. Who the hell was that?

My instincts immediately responded: I pulled my gun out of my pocket, cocked it and stormed into the room, pointing it at the woman's head. She immediately spun on her heels, her long red hair fluttering in the process, and pointed her own weapon at me.

When I recognised her face, my hands stopped functioning and my gun fell to the ground; my knees felt like they were about to crumple and my body started trembling.

Alicia. Alicia Sierra.

She was back, she was in front of me right now.

"A-Alicia..?" I breathed out, swallowing the lump in my throat. "Joder, realmente eres tú..."

"Si, realmente soy yo, Y/N," She smiled softly.

It took every ounce of energy in me to not jump into her arms, because of the baby and of the time we've been apart; I wasn't sure how she was going to take a hug from me right now.

"How, um-" I cleared my throat. "How's the baby?"

"It's okay. I just... hope it gets to meet you soon." She said. I felt my heart swell at the words, and for some miracle, my legs still didn't give out. The dominant and confident energy she emitted made me almost trip over my own feet while I tried to walk to the bathroom, my breath shaking.

I knew she was going to be focused on interrogating the Professor so I closed the door and let out long, unsteady breaths, crying silently. I didn't want her to see me cry, not just yet. I didn’t know how much time had passed, but I didn’t care. I was tired enough to fall asleep on the floor.

...

I woke up and my ears were met with pained moans and screams.

Alicia.

I immediately perked up and rushed out of the bathroom, the door slamming against the wall, startling everyone in the room. Benjamin, the Professor and Marseille were all tied up, but I was able to brush past that.

The love of my life was about to give birth, and she was about to do it alone.

I couldn’t let that happen.

"Alicia!" I said and ran over to her. "Ali, what the hell are you doing?"

"I-" She screamed in pain. "I have to give birth to this kid..."

"Hey, hey, hey, it's okay, breathe with me," I knelt down next to her and she looked me in the eyes as she tried to follow my breathing pattern. She was extremely sweaty and her hair was stuck to her forehead, but to me, she still looked divine. I found the courage to dry her face with my sleeve, and her gaze was still fixated on me, only her eyes softened at my gesture.

"Let me help you," I offered gently.

"No, I can do this," she argued.

"What if there are complications? What will you do then?"

"Screw complications, Y/N, I'm fine."

"Damn it, Sierra, why are you so stubborn?! Just let me help you!"

She sighed in defeat. "You're not letting this go, are you?"

"Well, you know me," I slightly tilted my head and smiled at her. She smiled back at me, chuckling softly. That certainly classified as a victory.

I walked her through the process: I hated to see her in pain, so I did my best to make this easy on her. It surprised me how comfortable she was at my touch, I thought she was going to be distrusting, like she was when we first met. That was the second victory.

She started pushing and the screams were getting worse; I felt like crying, wishing that there was anything I could do to ease her pain, to make her feel better. Unfortunately, there wasn't, so I needed to stay strong and comfort her instead.

"Shit, the baby's breech," I cursed.

"I'm guessing that med school pulled through." She said, straining. It astounded me how in the middle of one one of the most painful moments of a woman's life, she'd still act confident and plaster that annoyingly charming smirk on her face.

"You two know each other?" Professor asked.

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock," I replied sarcastically.

He rolled his eyes, but his curiosity didn't back down. "How do you know each other?"

I sighed, "Well, if you must know, she's my ex-girlfriend." I replied, trying to focus on pulling out the baby safely.

"Varsòvia, why didn’t you tell me?"

"It wasn’t important."

"How is it not important? You have a direct emotional connection with the leading inspector of the heist, of course it's important!"

"I'm a little busy here, can I ignore you some other time?"

I pulled the baby out and carefully wrapped her in a towel, her cries mixing with Alicia's heavy breaths. I gently put the baby in her arms and leaned my head on hers, sighing out of relief.

Alicia nuzzled into me and looked up at me, smiling. "Thank you."

I smiled back and ran my fingers through her red hair. "Don't mention it."

...

A lot of messed up shit later

The Professor, Alicia and I managed to escape the police's martial law. For now.

The apartment was empty, except for the delightful company of a ginger cat, who happened to be the friendliest I had ever met. Right now, it was cuddled up on the couch with Alicia, a sight that made me smile softly. The Professor went on the hunt for mobiles, anything with a signal, while I checked on little Victoria once again.

When the little girl caught sight of me, she gurgled. I smiled sweetly at her. "Hey, Victoria. Maybe when you'll be big you won't remember all of this chaos, and amen to that. You wouldn't want to remember if you had any idea of what's going. Trust me, your mommy is crazy enough to tell you all about this once you'll be old enough," I chuckled. "She might be crazy enough to tell you about me. I was your mommy's girlfriend, you know? And I loved her, very much, just like you do. I still love her. I guess this is a shitty timing, isn't it? In the middle of the fucking heist, where she was supposed to turn us in ages ago, I'm in love with her as if on the moment I laid eyes on her. That might just be because I'm not strong enough to let things go, I find good things in my life and desperately cling onto them until I make them sick and they leave me for good. Because that's what happened, honey. Sometimes heartbreak is just too much and you're so bent down under it you become stupid enough to get completely away from society and grieve on your own, you know?" A few tears silently flowed down my cheeks and I sniffled. "Of course you don't know. Look at me, I'm so screwed up that I'm unloading my emotional baggage on a day-old baby," I cried softly, burying my face in my hands. "Oh, thank God you don't understand a single word of what I'm saying because this would be the best thing to blackmail me for."

"You were never good with kids," her voice spoke behind me and I froze in place. I couldn’t find the courage to face her, so I took deep breaths until I spun on my heels slowly.

"Well, I'm shit with people in general," I countered, making her chuckle again. "How much of that did you hear?"

"About all of it."

"Joder," I sighed and hid my face in my hands out of embarrassment, blushing furiously.

Alicia stepped closer to me and gently pulled my hands away from my face, drying my falling tears while smiling softly.

"Hey, it's okay, it's okay. You didn't make anybody sick, honey. It wasn’t your problem, it was mine. I was young and stupid and scared of what could happen next and I treated you like trash in the process. Don't blame yourself for the shit I did, okay?"

I nodded in response and shakily breathed out. "I-I'm sorry... you weren't supposed to hear any of that and I'm sorry-"

"Sweetness, do you remember what I used to tell you about the apologising?"

"Sorry..."

She rolled her eyes, but her smile betrayed her action.

"You're sorry for what? For loving me? There's nothing wrong with that, and it's not in your control."

"It's okay if you have feelings for me. It's normal, and it's beautiful of you. I think you're an attractive woman as well, and I like you, and you like me. There's nothing wrong with that, the heart wants what it wants." That was what she said to me when I first told her I liked her. I remember I had little to no experience with same-sex relationships and until then had been faced with either rejection or lack of empathy or both, all of this affection and understanding had made me feel appreciated.

"I know, I just-" She cut me off with a loving, passionate kiss.

"Honey, shush," she chuckled. "I love you, too."

My eyes filled with tears again and I kissed her once more, caressing her face sweetly.

...

After the end of the heist

The walk from the helicopter to the gang was the most heartfelt moment ever.

For some miracle, we got out alive, thank God the Professor always had a backup plan. Unfortunately, not all of us made it. Oslo, Moskù, Berlín, sweet Nairobi and Tokyo were all left behind in the two heists. I would never forgive myself for what happened to them, for not saving them, none of us ever would. But what was important was that we made it, although not together as we thought, to the end of the heist.

The first person I hugged was Palermo: I leapt into his arms and wrapped my legs around his waist while he supported me with his hands. The love I felt for Palermo was completely platonic, given both our sexualities, but he was one of the most important people to me in the gang. He was my best friend, my safe haven, my protector, my genius.

"We did it, Palermo," I sniffled.

He wiped the falling tears from my face. "We did it, sweetheart."

After him, I embraced the happy couple, Sergio and Raquel. I congratulated the two for their engagement, earning a sweet "thank you" from both. "And thank you, Sergio, for this." I said sincerely, smiling and pecking his cheek. He smiled back and I hugged Raquel, who silently cried in my arms, sad to say goodbye.

Then came Rio. I hugged the kid so hard, I was surprised he wasn't out of air. I cried in his shoulder and he squeezed me with the same force. "I'm so sorry I couldn't save Tokyo," I said from the bottom of my heart. "Don't blame yourself, Varsòvia. It wasn’t your fault." I held his face in my hands and kissed his cheek as he cried harder and buried his own face in my shoulder.

I gave a brief hug to everyone else, wiping their tears and rubbing their backs. I was going to miss the gang, the group of people that opened a new chapter in my life, the best friends I'd ever had.

A car pulled up outside; the door opened and a flash of red came out. My eyes immediately lit up: Alicia was here with us. I rushed towards her and tackled her in a hug, to which she chuckled and hugged back with the same strength. She pressed out foreheads together and I let out a sigh of content, happy to finally be in her arms again.

She said her goodbyes to Sergio and Raquel, giving an embrace to the former and a handshake to the latter. He handed her her new identity with a smile, "There's one for Victoria as well." She thanked him and approached the car. I looked at her like a sad puppy, not knowing what to do. Should I go after her or stay with the gang?

I looked at Palermo for advice: he just nodded his head towards Alicia. "Go on," he encouraged, smiling. I gazed back at Alicia, admiring her green doe eyes and tantalising smile and rushed back to Palermo, giving him one last squeeze.

"Don't hesitate, honey," he advised. "You two are clearly meant to be."

"Thank you," I cried. "I'm going to miss you so much."

"Me too, Varsòvia, me too. Now go on, don't keep your lady waiting."

I smiled at him and caught Alicia's wrist before she could open the door to the car. She looked at me in surprise and I slammed my lips on hers, cupping her cheek as I brought her closer to me. The gang whooped and cheered as we kissed and she pulled me to the car. While she talked to the Professor, Palermo caught my gaze and gave me a knowing wink, making me blush slightly and grin at him again.

I waved goodbye to the gang as Alicia started driving off.

"So, where are we off to?" I asked her.

She rested her hand on mine, smiling at me. "Wherever we want, honey."

There was a moment of silence between us, a completely comfortable pause. It was one of the things I loved about being with her: the silence between us was never uncomfortable.

"You look beautiful." I blurted out, regretting it at first.

She chuckled, "Thanks. You used to say that a lot when we were together."

"Because it's true. And I will continue to say it forever."

"Forever? That's how long you're willing to stay with me?" She teased.

"With you and Victoria? I'd spend all my time with you two, no questions asked."

She smiled, moved, and surprised at how I turned her tease around into a sweet moment.

"I love you so much, Y/N."

"I love you, too."