#yes kana has felt the same things that nino did that same cocktail of jealousy and bitterness and hate and she has accepted it!
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kana and ruby are both characters who have been abandoned, whether it was unintentional or intentional, so kana deciding to take this heartbreaking step all to help ruby by appearing to abandon her knowing the devastation she is about to wreak because she's experienced it herself but doing it anyway because kana arima has never been more important than other peoples dreams and goals has always been the one to be sacrifice she does it again because she will be fine she always has been shes always been alone (right?)
(maybe a part of her is finally happy to say it all to let it all out but she buries that part because its shameful, isnt it? why should she take catharsis when shes caused her friend pain?)
and ruby who has been left behind being suddenly blindsided by this betrayal from kana, the one whos always supported her, on top of every other betrayal she has experienced left doubting every relationship she has wondering why why why why do people keep leaving?
#incoherent ramble because i love these two and this chapter is driving me up the walls#and kana isnt nino! shes a wonderful parallel of hers because even though#shes saying the same words but the intention behind them is completely different#yes kana has felt the same things that nino did that same cocktail of jealousy and bitterness and hate and she has accepted it!#and all that falls away in face of the sheer love and genuine care and admiration kana has for ruby as a friend and idol#(that nino did not have for ai because she didnt allow herself to)#to the point she was willing to play the role of all the those who hurt her out of care (and also sacrifice) for ruby because she recognise#how much this role meant to ruby and because kana has always always done the most she could to help those she loved#even at detriment to herself#kana arima!!!!#arima kana#hoshino ruby#oshi no ko#when they are both characters whove been left behind and the other chooses to do so to help and a twisted sense of sacrifice!!! fuck!!!#kana arima#ruby hoshino#oshi no ko manga spoilers#oshi no ko 133#its an hour to midnight here i need to sleep#the horrible guilt kana must feel and the devastation ruby is experiencing rn
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