#yeah tor as much shit as i talk i actually really don't like him

[bitch-butter]

Why do you really hate Matthew Leitch? Is there anything aside from his inability to act or do accents?

I don't think he's cute and i think his vibes are rancid.

more generally I really find his Preoccupation with rehashing everything Band of Brothers a little bit pedestrian and a Lot uncouth esp in the way he charged people for watching those mid-level zoom calls during covid. Like to my memory admittance was fairly pricey and the additions were even more. This isn't even to mention the exorbitant amount he charged for those "tours" he was really into doing for a bit (I'm not going to go into it but I personally found that whole business uh Creepy).

and more Pointedly he's not a good podcaster and i think he wants to steal Conor Ratliff's identity.

[moodcrab]

We need to talk about the Cum Lore of Reman Cyrodiil

First let's address the whole "his Dad fucked a hill" thing.

So yeah the story goes that King Hrol and his men, during a time of division and strife for Cyrodiil, saw a vision of Alessia. Hrol decided to "make union unto a hillock" which is exactly what it sounds like; he had sex with the actual dirt, and it was so good he actually died, his sheildthane died, and everyone else went insane.

Nine months later and the hill had grown into a mountain that would one day be Sancre Tor, and a shepherdess climbed up and found baby Reman with the Amulet of Kings embedded in his forehead (or just wearing it, depending on who you ask). Either way, this is proof that the baby was the legit Dragonborn and the shepherdess was able to walk him straight into the White Gold Tower and sit him on the Ruby Throne uncontested.

Now some might say that this is religious allegory mixed with Reman dynasty propaganda with just a sprinkle of truth; a King of the land making love to the land itself, representing its founding mother, producing the literal perfect righteous ruler of that land;

"I am Cyrodiil come." -Reman Cyrodiil, and he meant it literally.

...when in truth a noble probably sexually exploited a commoner, getting her pregnant, who then murdered him and claimed her son was legitimate. It's a very pessimistic view, and when you consider some of the crazy shit that has 100% definitely happened on Tamriel, it's a little overly skeptical. Like Elsie God-Hater levels of jaded. But however it happened, the Amulet of Kings, and later his Thu'um, proves Reman was the real deal.

I really want to believe the story, not only because it perfectly encapsulates how gross real life ancient mythology is, not only because it's a unique and crazy story where this demi god emperor is literally made of dirt and jizz as a living personification of the country, but because that shepherdess would later become one of Reman's concubines who would bake his cum into bread and feed it back to him, and this shit is so wild as it is without her also being his mother!

Reman, which means "Light of Man" (ray-man) really brings home the Roman flare to the Cyrods with his crazy origins, he's a much cooler and more mysterious figure than that Tiber Septim dickhead, and it would be very hard for the Thalmor to so easily dismiss his divine credentials. Talos is banned? Good riddance, who wants crackers when we have fresh baked bread at home 😋.

I read once that Reman spontaneously ejaculated over the corpses of his slain enemies. I don't know if that's canon or just some Reddit Kirkbride insanity but I read it and now you have. The true Ninth Divine right there.

[vinnival]

main 3 +tricky and mag tor w/ an s/o who is a serious loose cannon. like, not in a funky way, more in a "the world is dying and i'm dying, let's speed this up a little" you don't have to if it makes you feel uncomfy, but ive been going through a bout of sxicidal recklessness and i am really not ok

just wanna say this because I don't think I have: if ANY of you guys are going through a tough time I promise I'll be here whenever you need someone to vent to! I'm always open arms !!! I promise <3

I myself have anxiety and get scared when wanting to talk to someone when I'm feeling alone and frustrated but I assure you I would much rather anyone talk to me to feel better than to suffer in silence. That is all. Enjoy <333

TW for suicidal attempts and thoughts !!

Reconsider

HANK

He noticed you being more... carefree... with your attacks, more open for a chance for someone to strike back

He doesn't like it

But he doesn't approach you about it just yet

It took you literally STANDING IN FRONT OF A TRAIN ABOUT TO HIT YOU- he saved you by tackling you out of the way- for him to realize that you're actually willing to die

It scares him so much

He brings you home in silence

Like usually he's silent but this is like SILENT silent

You couldn't stop shaking

Not from fear, from disappointment

When you two got home, he didn't let go of you until you both got to his room, a nice and quiet place to talk about this

He sat you on his bed and dragged over a chair for him to sit on, so you two can completely face each other

You two stared at each other for a short while before he lifted up his hands to sign;

"So."

You blinked, he continued

"What was that?"

You began to tilt your head downward, avoiding his gaze, before you were stopped by his hand catching underneath your chin to lift your head back up

With you looking at him again, he tilted his head expectantly

You sighed, your voice was quiet with the next few words

"...the world is dying, and I'm dying. Why not speed it up?"

Thanks to the silence in the room, Hank heard you clear as day

You jumped when you heard his gravelly voice respond.

"One second."

"W-what?" He didn't talk much at all, so that startled you.

"One... second." He repeated. Then he brought his hands back up to continue.

"One more second is all that matters to me. If you're ever in a situation like that, just think-" He said the next few words out loud as he signed, "one more second w... wouldn't hurt." he continued with his hands, "Keep thinking it. Don't stop until the urges go away. Fight for your life love, always. I know it's hard to keep going. God, I know that all too well. But, might as well yell "fuck you" right back at this shit show called life, you know?"

By the time he finished, you were tearing up

You couldn't ask for a better boyfriend, ever

I may or may not have gone a little overboard on that one but I feel like Hank is the one to actually understand urges like that and yeah

SANFORD

Says something as soon as he notices you acting different and being more accepting of wounds

He sits you down at the kitchen table next to him and is like, "okay, whats going on?"

Like it or not, he's gonna sit there and listen to you vent about everything weighing you down and how you're struggling with life st this point

He immediately pulls you into a hug when he realizes you're choking up

You two just sit there

"How about this. Stay alive for me, and I promise we'll make it worthwhile, sugarplum. Okay?"

"I can't make any promises," he cuts you off with a huff at that, "but I promise I'll put a bit more thought into being careful."

DEIMOS

He thought it was simply a funny lil joke at first, because he jokes about that stuff too (he suffers his own bit of existentialism, I assume)

But then you actually just let a MAG grab you and almost crush you one time

Luckily you were on a partner mission with Hank and he took care of the MAG before they could crinkle you like soda can

You stared at Hank incredulously but he only shook his head and pointed out of the building, for you to return to the car

He signed, "Deimos saw that on my cam. He's yelling through the intercom to rendezvous with you."

You couldn't ignore the call of your beloved, so you shamefully hurried over to your boyfriend running into the building

"Love, excuse my French but what the goddamn fuck was that?"

You didn't answer him, and he pulled you out of the building

You two talk it over once you're both at the car

"Look, it's fine to joke about it. That's how I deal with that bullshit, but you can't just give in when it tells you to. You know better than that," there was desperation in his voice as it cracked with the next words, "...please dont do that again." His hands were holding your face gently, they were warm, but you can feel his pulse- very quick and stuttery

Doesn't let you have any weapons or sharp objects, and stays at home with you until your urges subside

"Hey you wanna try and find healthy coping mechanisms for your urges?"

deimos my beloved

TRICKY

You thought you could ask him to kill you and he'd oblige

It isn't gonna be that easy lmao he's impulsive but not That impulsive

When you asked him to do it, you two were sitting across from each other, relaxing

After you asked, his head immediately swiveled to look at you incredulously

"CLOWN WONT KILL FRIEND"

You sighed, "Well, it was worth a shot."

He scooted so he could be closer to you

You were kind of uncomfortable by how much he was just staring you down, his own face inching closer and closer to yours until he stopped

He was like 5 inches from your face

"FRIEND WONT DIE. FRIEND KEEP GOING. FRIEND PERSEVERE"

"Tricky, no, you don't get it. I can't find a REASON to."

You watched their brow furrow in concentration

"THINK HAPPY. REMEMBER GOOD. MAYBE THAT HELP"

You were kind of stunned into silence, the insane clown killer of nevada was telling you to recount good times?

"PROMISE, CLOWN PROMISES... GOOD MEMORIES WILL RETURN. WE MAKE NEW GOOD MEMORIES, YES?"

You smiled meekly at his genuine attempts to help, it really meant a lot coming from him

He then inched his face forward a little more, and gently pressed his forehead against yours, purring in content

MAG AGENT TORTURE

He connected the dots after you've attempted to be a human shield for him

Well, for the 10th time

You were too small, whats the point in being a shield?

After you tried once again in a tense battle, he gently swooped you up into his hand and just walked away from the fight LMAIFBAD

You were confused, telling Tor to turn back and that you could both take them on together

He refused

Now it was Your Turn to realize that he must have figured out your overprotective yet suicidal attempts when helping Tor

He brought you into the dining cafe, and sat down on the floor

The cashier asked nervously if Tor wanted the regular, and the MAG nodded but didn't break your stare

He tilted his head and grumbled a bit

You curled up and hugged your knees, grumbling yourself

He blew on you, and you finally looked at him

You groaned and just let it out

Your worries, the stress of being at AAHW, how you have literally no reason to keep going, there's no hope, all of it

He just sat there and nodded when you said something particularly agreeable

When you finished, you ended with, "And, well... the world is dying, why not speed it up?"

Torture immediately shook his head no, quickly pulling you into a very tight- but bearable- hug

The fight that you two ran away from earlier ended, and Tor carried you to one of the AAHW teaching rooms

It had a whiteboard

You realized what he was doing. He wanted to write something...

He picked up a dry-erase marker (with difficulty) and wrote, in big. shaky, swoopy letters:

"Dont stop trying, my love. Always find a reason to keep going, if you can't, push through, you eventually will"

You hugged him again, nodding feebly

[messinwitheddie]

Oh my gosh! Reg has a lil sister!! Who’s Dibs new wife? Is it Mabel? How does Dipper feel if that’s the case?

Soos "Sorry I didn't make it in time to help set up, dude."

Dipper "It's fine. The Shack is all set to go for the big day. Mabel will be glad to see you."

Soos "Can't promise I'm not gonna cry, dude."

Dipper "You know...same."

Soos "I still can't believe you're ok with this. I mean, Dib's our friend and he's a great guy and all, but..."

Dipper "Dib's a spoiled brat, I know."

Soos "Well, that and he treats his women like garbage."

Dipper "I think he's genuinely grown up in that aspect. Mabel is confident he has anyways. She's been through so much shit, man, what with the lawsuit and the mis-- She's happy with him. He seems happy with her, so I'm going to ignore my better judgment and be happy for them. If Dib does end up doing anything to hurt her I'll knock him the fuck out, that's all."

Soos "That's big of you, dude. You're a good brother."

Dipper *sighs* "Yeah ..."

Soos "Have you messed around with any of Ford's equipment yet?"

Dipper "Oh, uh...

....

....no."

Reg "I'm happy Dad and Mabel are a thing now. Mabel is really nice. Dipper and I play D&D online more often now. Dad's actually mellowed out considerably since they started going out. He took it really personally when I told him I wanted to move in with mom. Things have been tense between us ever since. Maybe I'll be able to extend my 15 minute max contact rule next time we're in the same room.

Their wedding was really fun, what parts of it weren't flung into chaos. Zim came, he brought a plus one. They behaved themselves pretty well. The Mystery Shack was the perfect place tor the ceremony.

I actually haven't met Eowyn in person yet, but Mabel and I zoom call. I'm proud to be an older brother finally. I plan on visiting during break. Hopefully dad has returned to earth by then."

Dib "Reg seems ok with it. I mean, his mother and I had split up romantically long before I started to date Mabel. Lorelai and I are on much better terms these days and he's known the Pines family since he was born. I have trouble reading him, but he doesn't seem to have a problem with us.

To be honest...we...don't talk much anymore. Reg went to live with his mother in the von Verminstrasser cryptid reserve when he entered highschool. That's all the way in Baden-Württemberg. We hadn't seen each other in person until the wedding. Reg had just turned 16.

Now he's in college studying biotechnology in Delhi. I went to his high school graduation, but we haven't talked in person since then. He hasn't contacted me since I left earth with Zim... I wish I knew what I did to make him so distant. I'm afraid to ask at this point...

It's been fun, exploring space with Zim and I miss the little gremlin already, but I have a lot to sort out with my family on earth."