#xena's share day

[illarian-rambling]

Not a horror writer specifically, but I do pride myself on some scary monster :)

"Mashal!”

Astra screamed as she watched the monster toss her friend about twenty feet back like he didn’t weight a solid ton. Mashal’s shriek, along with the lights of his eyes, was cut off as he impacted the water. She held her breath, waiting to hear him surface, only, he never did.

For a moment, it was just Astra, the beast, and the devouring dark.

Suddenly, there came a hissing swish from the side and Astra dropped on instinct. She was blind without Mashal to provide light, so all she could do was curl into a ball and hold her breath as she felt the beast trample over her. A yelp escaped her lips as its foot came down on her free-floating hair, ripping out fair chunk.

Lungs burning, Astra kicked off towards the surface. She felt around in her coat as she did, drawing her trusty pocket knife. It wasn’t much of a weapon. Mostly, it found its use as a nail-trimmer and vegetable chopper. Still, this wouldn’t be her first time wielding it in a pinch.

Astra surfaced as silently as she could. The darkness here was like that of the deepest cave—no light for her eyes to adjust to, no matter how long she spent in shadow. She did her best to breathe quietly, no matter how much she wanted to gasp for air.

Somewhere nearby, she could hear the beast sloshing around. Every time it moved, a low groan spilled from its chest-mouth, pained and bassy. Astra knew unquestioningly that it was searching for her.

The witch crouched low in the water as she worked her way closer to the wall. The slimy feel of the stone on her back was comforting, in a way. It meant no attack was coming from behind. She glanced to the left, hoping to see something, anything, but finding nothing.

Where the hell was Mashal? He didn’t need to breathe, it was doubtful he’d gotten caught on anything. Astra stared intently in the direction he’d disappeared, yet the lights of his eyes never resurfaced.

Had he gotten knocked out somehow? If his heart rune had been jostled the right way, she figured it was possible. Or maybe the water was deeper where the beast had tossed him.

Either way, Astra currently had four fire, two shadow, and one ice rune, a bottle of galura toxin that was nowhere near fermented enough to be functional, and a measly dagger to work with. She also couldn’t see the damn thing she was fighting. If she didn’t want to die here, she needed to find Mashal.

Astra began to feel her way through the water, moving as slow as the rolling fog. She could do this. Her battle now wasn’t one of confidence and magic, but one of simple survival. Get Mashal, light up the area, kill the fuck out of the—

The witch froze as her outstretched hand met clammy flesh.

Goosebumps traveled up Astra’s arm in a wave as she took in the repugnant texture. The flesh shifted as well, rippling like maggots were moving beneath. Fingers probed up Astra’s sleeve, inspected her palm. For a second, the beast seemed about to interlace its fingers with hers.

Xena’s Share Day

this one is for my lovely horror writers :) show me something scary. make me shiver and cringe! i wanna be unsettled!

*this is a horror prompt, so there may be difficult subjects included in shared snippets. read at your own discretion.

[girl4music]

Happy 29th anniversary to the pilot episode of XENA.

Original air date: September 4th, 1995.

Directed by Doug Lefler. Written by Robert Tapert.

Lead starring Lucy Lawless as Xena.

and Renee O’Connor as Gabrielle.

I will watch and write meta about other TV shows.

I will watch and write meta about other TV ships.

But nothing I watch or write meta about in this world will ever come close to matching my fan passion and loyalty to the TV show ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’ and the TV ship Xena and Gabrielle. They are my one true love.

What ‘Sins Of The Past’ does once you’ve seen the whole TV show and watch the episode back over is it shows you how intertwined these soulmates already are as the event of them meeting saves their lives and once you are aware of the wheres and whys of this - the show itself completely changes into something more valuable than you initially saw and understood. I recommend people go back and watch it and only view it as a love story from the very beginning because the way it hits you when you do is just mind-blowing.

They set up a beautifully complex and layered WLW love story between Xena and Gabrielle without really realizing that that’s what they were doing because it’s such a very natural and authentic queer storytelling of two strangers that find home in the soul of each other.

"There’s not a word yet, for old friends who’ve just met” is a lyric in a song written by Paul Williams and Kenny Ascher from ‘The Muppets Movie’. Writer and co-executive producer, who wrote many of the most formative episodes of ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’, Steven L. Sears affectionately ascribes that lyric to Xena and Gabrielle because he believes it perfectly describes the incredible soulmate connection that the two main characters share right from the very beginning of the TV show. And I would have to say that I agree with him on that because no matter what alternative Universe, Uber timeline, reincarnated lifetime or afterlife it is, they meet each other and they develop an attraction to and affinity for each other that seemingly goes way beyond basic friendship and romance and they have a dynamic that is so strong, so substantial and so damn profound that the studio gave up on censoring them. It’s a dynamite chemistry that can be felt so viscerally that you can watch the episodes countless times over and still pick up on fresh new things about the way these two characters are with one another and how they balance and complement each other so perfectly that they’re basically the human representation of yin and yang. And you can read my Xena and Gabrielle: Character study thesis to learn what I mean by that.

Their relationship is incredibly well-written in that it’s so carefully and conscientiously slow-burned and evolved from friends into lovers that it will make it impossible not to ship them together. Believe me - even if you’ve seen Xena before, you haven’t seen it like this. You haven’t seen it as a WLW love story from the beginning to the end. But once you do, you will be attached to it in ways that will make you just like me.

That is… Lifelong dedicated to and enamoured with it.

This is a TV show that finished airing in the year 2001 but it’s been my everything since I first discovered it at 5 years old just flicking through the UK channels bored out of my mind or so my parents have told me.

I cannot even begin to imagine of who I’d be without this TV show and TV ship in my life and I know no other will ever come close to it or them for me for the rest of my life. So all day today I am spending my time celebrating not just the TV show’s anniversary of its pilot episode but also Xena and Gabrielle’s anniversary of meeting and becoming the greatest love story ever told in TV art/entertainment history. They’re iconic and legendary in the LGBTQ community for a reason. That reason is that they’re the first and, honestly, still the best WLW/queer representation that can ever be witnessed and engaged with on the TV screen. The factors as to why that’s true are many,… but mainly… it’s because they were allowed to exist and evolve together as the only lead main female characters in such a way that no other WLW ship on TV ever would or could do so again. They may have been severely censored as an explicit romantic and fully maintext confirmed and committed couple on screen but the creators never let that prevent them from providing a depiction of an all-encompassing love that was much like a romance and still went beyond a romance. Xena and Gabrielle’s love went way beyond the boundaries of romance. I’m not ever saying it’s not that. I’m just saying that it’s more than that and that’s exactly what makes it even more romantic than anything else ever created at least in the TV format and paradigm it was.

Since then, the landscape has changed so drastically that TV WLW/queer ships are never given what they got. Which was a 6 seasons, 22-24 episodes-long epic journey of them just being each other’s absolute EVERYTHING. You can see, hear and feel every single moment of that in who Xena and Gabrielle are as both individual main characters and as a main character dynamic because they do not ever neglect any real and raw aspect about them. The only thing you do not ever get to see between them - although it is heavily implied often - is sexual intimacy. That really is not a loss because everything else that should or needs to be there is there way more than it is with any other WLW/queer TV ships in any other TV shows because they’re lead main characters. In fact… they’re the only lead main characters that are credited throughout the entire run of ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’ and, honestly, sometimes I do wish TV ships in other TV shows would censor themselves every now and again so that they would be forced to dig deeper into the nuances and details as much as they did with Xena and Gabrielle.

I know many would disagree with me here but I’m adamant that the censorship helped them more than it hindered them because what you got instead with them was such a powerful representation of true love that didn’t have to rely on sex to represent it. I know that they couldn’t be shown to be sexually intimate because it wasn’t allowed to be sexual. Nowadays it can but I find that sex is used too much now when it shouldn’t be because a real life WLW/queer ship is more than sex and that’s why Xena and Gabrielle is still better representation even in this day and age.

It’s a combination of queer censorship, unbelievably strong chemistry between the leads and the creator/cast/crew’s sincere intention with queer storytelling that gave us the truly EPIC WLW love story that we got with XENA and I wouldn’t have it any other way because, for me, that is everything I could ever want.

So if you love this TV show and TV ship, please join me in celebrating the timelessly magical experience it is by writing meta about what these things mean to you.

XENA: “You know, I’m sending you home in the morning.”

GABRIELLE: “I won’t stay home. I don’t belong there, Xena. I’m not the little girl that my parents wanted me to be. You wouldn’t understand.”

XENA: “It’s not easy proving you’re a different person.

*Gabrielle eyes her curiously, Xena throws a bundle of blankets at her, gestures to the other side of the fire*

You can sleep over there.”

XENA: “You know, where I’m headed, they’ll be trouble.”

GABRIELLE: “I know.”

XENA: “Then why would you want to go into that with me?”

GABRIELLE: “That’s what friends do. They stand by each other when there’s trouble.”

XENA: “All right, friend.”

[cappuccinoandglitter]

2024 Creativity Recap

I was tagged by @do-androids-dream-ao3acc to do this. I think it sounds fun so here goes.

I've been writing for my entire life but 2024 was the year I came back to fanfiction (for context, the last time I wrote fanfiction was before AO3 was even a thing--or I was not aware of it in the early days--and I think it was mostly self-insert Xena or Highlander stuff, so yeah, way back then).

It was Buck and Tommy who brought me back in. I just couldn't resist them. So on AO3 I have 117,674 words about them, spread across 5 fandoms (if you count Lone Star as separate from 9-1-1).

2 series, 7 works.

Practically Everything | Part 1 of Who Wants to Live Forever, because we never truly left the Highlander fandom. There's a lot Buck doesn't know about Tommy, including that he's an immortal born in the 1800s.

Flags | A little one-shot about Buck and Tommy attending their first Pride festival together.

Lightning Strikes Twice | Sequel to Practically Everything, where we learn more about immortals, what the fuck happened between Buck and Lucy in part one, and we meet Andromache of Scythia.

It's not what you think | When Tevan fandom was dealing with the breakup by jumping on the SWAT bus, and all the Rocker fics started popping up, I contributed.

Let's Try Being In Love | My most popularest boy. Born of the idea 'what if Tommy was a dispatcher and he took the home invasion call instead of Abby in the pilot episode?' and it just spiraled from there.

Step Into The Light | Sequel to Let's Try Being In Love, because I really grew to love this Dispatcher Tommy AU and a lot of people seemed to also enjoy it.

Hero Worship | I always thought Connor and Buck had an unrequited or mutual but secret crush. Then I saw the same actor play a firefighter on SWAT and since we've all decided that SWAT and 9-1-1 share a universe, and since the latter has already established identical cousins are a thing that exists, I decided Connor joined the LAFD and started fucking Tommy's cousin Rocker. WIP.

[reysdriver]

Remus Lupin Masterlist

✩ - Fluff ☾ - Angst 𖦹 - Smut

♡ - Xena's Favourites

Series/AU

Dad!Remus

Dealer!Remus

Rockstar!Remus

Headcanons

Remus in December - ✩

Drabbles

Nothing But The Necklace - ✩♡ - Your first Valentine's Day after Hogwarts with Remus

Favourite Jumper - ✩ - Remus can't find his favourite autumn jumper

Somnophilia - 𖦹 - Remus can't help himself when he wakes up after a wet dream next to you

Sunday Roast - ✩ - Remus fixes you a plate at dinner and you get heart eyes

Oneshots

Treehouse - ✩ - Remus shows you his secret hideout, his safe place

Chocolate Cake - ✩♡ - Spending the first night in your new flat eating chocolate cake on the floor

Drunk Walk Home - ✩♡ - Bringing your drunk boyfriend up to his dorm after a party

Piggyback - ✩☾♡ - Remus gets jealous after you spend an afternoon with James, but you sweetly assure him he has nothing to be worried about

Reminiscence - ✩ - You and Remus confess your feelings for each other at James & Lily's wedding, but it's never too late

Book Club - ✩♡ - You and Remus share a love of reading, and one of his books reveals his feelings for you

Hospital Wing - ✩ - You visit Remus in the Hospital Wing after a rough full moon

[jenxwp]

Is There a Doctor in the House? Script

Hey all, it’s been a while but I thought I would have a look at another production script and see what details I could find! So lucky dip off the shelf was… *drumroll* ...Is There a Doctor in the House!

So, this is production #76925 and was probably filmed around March 1996. It first aired in July 1996 and interestingly enough, Altared States was production #76926 meaning it was intended to be the finale. I don’t know about you guys, but I think that would have been a let down compared to ITADITH as the finale. Glad it happened as it did.

The first thing I wanted to point out was that this episode happens over 2 days and 1 night. I don’t know why- I just found that interesting.

So minor detail difference when the first find Ephiny- in the script she is sitting against a tree whereas in the episode, she is lying flat under scrub. The episode also has an extra line that isn’t in the script where Xena acknowledges the wound.

Our first description of Marmax- apparently ‘think General Patton’. I had no idea who this was but google tells me a US army officer from WWI and WWII? Maybe someone with more American military history can fill in any relevance around this?

Also interesting to note- in the episode, after Marmax disperses his troops he sees a Thessalian foot soldier and begins chasing him shouting “Thessalian scum!”. Xena knocks him off his horse with her chakram sharing a nod to the Thessalian. She then draws her sword and wounds him as the teaser fades. This is not quite what is in the script…

I will share a snippet of the first time Xena saves a life in the hospital. There are a few differences in dialogue compared to what was eventually filmed and aired. A few standout points is that in the episode, Gabrielle gets involved in the procedure a lot sooner than was originally scripted. Also, it was scripted a lot more ‘bloody’ with Galen being sprayed with blood. In the episode, Galen does jump back but we don’t see blood everywhere. _90s TV censorship_

We also have a small deleted scene interaction between Democritus, Hippocrates and Galen right after…

Now here is an interesting one! The man’s son that Gabrielle goes to find was originally scripted to be an adult friend. There were also a few extra lines where Gabrielle promises Democritus that she will be careful. This isn’t in the final cut.

This description of Gabrielle’s wounds 😫

Another deleted scene…

Okay I don’t know what to say here… I am glad Xena didn’t hold the baby up by its legs and give its ‘rump a slap’…

Aaand I will just leave this excerpt here…

What script next?

[threepwoodmarley]

All Hail To The Days That Merit More Praise

Merry Christmas @goldenwingediris! I'm your Secret Santa! I really hope you enjoy your fic. It was a lot of fun to write.

Summary: The Midwinter Festival is Belle's favourite time of year and she's determined to share the festive spirit with Rumplestiltskin, whether he likes it or not.

Title from the Loreena McKennitt song 'In Praise of Christmas', which I hope was the basis of your prompt because it's what I've been listening to on repeat while writing and which inspired a lot of this fic!

(Also, there is a line in here that I lifted from Xena: Warrior Princess because it fit so perfectly.)

Read on AO3

~*~

Belle put her hands on her hips as she looked around the great hall in satisfaction. A morning spent collecting holly from the castle grounds and decorating every available window and surface was a morning well spent. It wasn’t quite up to the standards of the grand displays back in Avonlea but she had to make do with what was available and even if it was basic, the green leaves and red berries made a lovely contrast, putting her in a festive mood.

The sound of the large doors opening heralded the arrival of her master and she turned to face them, excited to share her festive spirit with him.

“Good morning, Rumplestiltskin,” Belle called brightly, watching his face as he noticed the new additions to the great hall. She stifled a giggle as he turned in a circle, visibly confused.

“Belle. Why is there a forest in my hall?”

“It’s for the Midwinter Festival!” Belle felt her smile widening in excitement. “This is my favourite time of the year!”

“Really?” Rumplestiltskin looked at her sceptically as he moved towards the table. “Your favourite time of the year is when it’s dark, cold and miserable?”

“Oh, but you see that’s the whole point!” she cried emphatically. “It’s dark and cold outside so we bring light and cheer inside. It’s all about bringing back the light and driving out the darkness.”

“Well, as the embodiment of Darkness I have no desire to be driven out of my own castle, so I think we can dispense with all this.” Rumplestiltskin flicked his hand dismissively and Belle felt her heart sink as all her hard work disappeared. “That’s better.”

“Rumplestiltskin!” Belle cried, “bring those back!”

“Hmm, no. I don’t think I will.”

“You bring those back right now or I’ll..” Belle trailed off as she found herself engulfed in a whirlwind of smoke, only to reappear outside.

“Rumplestiltskin!” Belle practically shrieked, wrapping her arms around herself against the cold. “It’s freezing out here!”

Another cloud of smoke enveloped her and she felt warmth pressing down on her shoulders. When it cleared she looked down to see a heavy cloak fastened around herself.

“Fine,” she called to the empty courtyard. “If that’s how you want to play it!”

Receiving no response, Belle set off to forage for more supplies. She was determined not to allow his moodiness to defeat her festive spirit.

~*~

The next morning, as Belle stood surveying her handiwork, she felt a bit more trepidation at Rumplestiltskin’s potential arrival than she had the previous day. But she was still determined not to give in.

When he walked into the great hall she saw the moment he noticed the return of the decorations, turning to her with a scowl.

“I thought we had enough of this nonsense yesterday.”

“That was just the first day,” Belle explained patiently. “In Avonlea the Midwinter Festival is twelve full days of celebration.”

“Twelve days?” Rumplestiltskin seemed aghast. “What on earth do you do for twelve days? Other than bringing potential infestations inside, that is.”

Belle rolled her eyes as she watched him carefully pull back a holly leaf, inspecting the underside as though he expected to find something hideous there.

“They’re clean. Don’t worry, I checked. And as for what we do, we guide the sun home.”

“Excuse me?” He turned to face her completely, incredulity written across his face.

“Yes, when the days are at their darkest and it seems like the sun might never return, we sing songs and light candles to guide his way.”

“What?” Something strange flickered over Rumplestiltskin’s face but it was gone before Belle could identify the meaning.

“And we throw parties and have feasts to celebrate his return. It’s a time of community and joy.”

“Sounds like a nightmare. One that I believe I made my feelings on quite clear.” Rumplestiltskin raised his hand and Belle lunged forward, grabbing it in both of hers.

“Don’t you dare!”

Rumplestiltskin froze, his eyes widening in shock, just as Belle realised what she had done.

“Sorry!” She pulled her hands back. “It’s just… this means a lot to me. Please.”

A beat passed between them as she held her breath, waiting for his response. For his part, he still seemed stunned by her previous impulsive action.

“Fine,” Rumplestiltskin relented, slowly lowering his hand which was still twitching slightly. “But you know that’s all superstitious nonsense, right? The cycle of the seasons has nothing to do with you singing some silly little songs.”

“I know, but that’s not the point.” Belle wasn’t quite sure why it was so important to her that he understand, but it was.. “It’s about hope. How even when things are at their very darkest, there’s always light on the horizon. Don’t you have any celebrations like that at this time of year?”

“Of course not,” Rumplestiltskin snorted derisively. “Not all of us come from backwater swamps.”

“Well, maybe you could join mine. Festivities are meant to be shared, after all.” Belle deliberately ignored the slight. She knew that he was fully aware of the status of her town. He was just trying to antagonise her.

“I’m not singing.” Rumplestiltskin pointed his finger at her.

“That’s all right.” Belle leaned closer to him and lowered her voice. “To be honest with you, I’m not a very good singer either.”

“Uh, no.” Rumplestiltskin stepped back, raising his hands with his fingers pointed upwards, “I didn’t say that I wasn’t good at it, I said I’m not doing it.”

“So, you can sing?” Now that was intriguing. As was his apparent offence at her assumption.

“Perhaps. Fortunately for me, that’s something you’ll never find out. The Dark One doesn’t sing, dearie.”

Well, that was a small price to pay and Belle fought to hide her grin at her victory.

“Fine,” she acquiesced. “I promise not to ask you to sing if you let me celebrate the Midwinter Festival.”

“Fine.” Rumplestiltskin waved his fingers dismissively. “Keep your silly little greenery. Just don’t let it interfere with your duties.”

He turned and started towards the corner of the hall, suddenly stopping in his tracks.

“What on earth…?”

Ah, he’d noticed the ivy she’d woven through his spinning wheel. Belle bit her lip, hoping she hadn’t gone too far, as she stepped up to his side to explain.

“All work not directly related to the festivities is banned throughout the Midwinter Festival, so traditionally women in Avonlea would weave flowers through their spinning wheels so they couldn’t be used.”

“But it’s not your spinning wheel, is it dearie?”

“No, but it’s tradition.”

“Is it?” He turned to face her, raising his eyebrow. “Or is this whole thing just an elaborate excuse for you to get out of working for two weeks?”

“Well looking after your own house is permitted, so don’t worry. You won’t starve.”

Rumplestiltskin’s mouth dropped open slightly but he didn’t reply, simply turning and walking out of the hall. Belle smiled to herself at the fact that he left the ivy-clad spinning wheel untouched.

~*~

The next day Belle squealed with delight as she opened a drawer in the kitchen to find a set of beautiful red and white candles next to intricately woven metal holders. Gathering them up quickly she hurried to the great hall and set about carefully placing them within the garlands of greenery she’d set up before.

The Dark Castle certainly lived up to its name at the best of times, but it was especially true at this time of year when the sun rose late and set early and was hidden by clouds for much of the rest of the day. The thought of bringing some light into the place with the beautiful candles was a very welcome one.

She’d just finished lighting the last candle when Rumplestiltskin appeared in the doorway.

“I see we’re adding fire hazards now,” he said sardonically. “Wonderful.”

Belle just smiled at him fondly.

“What?” He seemed unnerved by her lack of a response.

“Thank you for the candles.”

Rumplestiltskin frowned. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Right,” Belle decided to humour him. “Maybe it was the castle that gave them to me.”

She winked as she sauntered past him, already thinking about the next festive aspect of Midwinter that she wanted to share with her master.

~*~

That evening Belle rummaged around the kitchen for the supplies she was looking for, and once again the castle provided. Unearthing a nice looking bottle of wine and various spices, Belle cast her mind back to winter evenings in Avonlea, glad that she had often snuck down to watch the mulled wine being made.

First was the matter of serving Rumplestiltskin his dinner, but once that had been taken care of she began the process of mulling the wine, hoping to time it just right that she could bring it up soon after he finished eating.

Soon the kitchen was filled with the delicious spicy sweet scent of mulled wine and Belle inhaled deeply, pleased with the results. Now she just had to find a way to serve it. Back at her father’s castle the mulled wine was the centerpiece of the table, kept warm in a beautiful ceramic pot. So far she hadn’t found anything like that in her kitchen in this castle and was resigning herself to putting it in a plain dish when she opened the last cupboard and gasped in delight at the bowl sitting on the shelf directly at her eye level.

Reaching in carefully, she gently pulled the container out, not fully understanding why but somehow knowing that this was a special piece. The dark wood shone and caught the light as she slowly turned it in her hands, admiring the intricate holly and ivy carvings looping around the sides.

It wasn’t as big as the one from the castle and she couldn’t put it over a heat source, but that didn’t matter. This wine was just for her and Rumpelstiltskin, a far more intimate set up than any she’d experienced back in Avonlea.

Decanting the wine from the pot she’d mulled it in into the bowl was a careful process as she had no desire to spill any on herself. Once that had been accomplished she gathered up the bowl and returned to the great hall where Rumplestiltskin had just finished his dinner.

“Good health, Rumplestiltskin!” Belle called as she set down the bowl. “I have another tradition I’d like to share with you.”

“What…” Rumpelstiltskin looked up, his words trailing off and his mouth dropping open as he caught sight of what she had placed on the table.

“It’s mulled wine!” Belle explained, “one of my favourite drinks at this time of year.”

“Where did you get that?” Rumplestiltskin was still staring at the centre of the table.

“I made it. You had all the spices I needed in your kitchen and plenty of bottles of wine. I didn’t think you’d mind me using one of them for this.”

“No, the bowl.” He stood from his seat and leaned forward to get a better look at it. “Where did you find that?”

“Oh, it was in one of the cupboards. I’m not sure why I’ve never seen it before, it wasn’t exactly hidden.” Belle shrugged, then frowned as she realised what she was missing. “Drat, I forgot the glasses. I’ll be right back.”

“No need.” Rumplestiltskin returned his attention to her and waved his hand. Belle blinked as two wooden cups and a ladle appeared beside the bowl.

“Thank you.” She picked up the first cup and filled it, handing it to him before filling her own.

Taking her first sip she smiled as the warmth of the wine and spices hit her but resisted the temptation to close her eyes, wanting to see Rumplestiltskin’s reaction when he tried it himself.

He sniffed the contents of the cup almost suspiciously before cautiously raising it to his lips. A small sip was immediately followed by a larger one and Belle felt a tension in her heart release. She hadn’t truly realised until that moment just how important his opinion was to her.

When he didn’t offer any response after a few seconds, she couldn’t hold the question in any longer.

“Do you like it?” she asked hopefully.

He tilted his head as though considering his reply.

“It’s not terrible.” His words might have had more bite had they not been immediately followed by another sip.

He was still standing slightly awkwardly and Belle looked around, noticing the sofa set up by the fireplace.

“Shall we sit by the fire?”

“Why?”

“Because it’ll be cosy over there. We can bring the wine with us.”

Still appearing slightly suspicious of her suggestion, Rumplestiltskin nevertheless moved with her to the fireplace, taking a seat on the far end of the sofa. Belle followed, bringing the bowl of wine and placing it on a low table nearby.

Debating with herself for only a second she sat down in the centre of the sofa, causing Rumplestiltskin to look at her oddly before facing away again..

She could feel him sitting rigidly beside her and searched for something to break the silence. A memory from childhood came to her.

“You know some people say you can see your future if you stare into the flames long enough.”

“Hmm, pyromancy,” Rumplestiltskin replied, not looking away from the fire.

Belle huffed a small laugh. “Of course you already know that. Is it a real thing? Can you do it?”

“No.”

“To which?”

“Both.”

“Well that’s a relief. When I was a little girl my friends and I were looking into the flames because we’d heard that if we tried hard enough we’d see the faces of our future husbands.”

“And what did you see?”

“Flames.” Belle laughed and took another sip of her wine. “But all my friends were gushing about the handsome faces they’d seen so I pretended I had too. I think the face I made up sounded very much like Gaston.”

“Ah, so even as a child you wanted to marry him.”

“No,” Belle corrected. “Even as a child I knew I was supposed to marry him. I had very little say in the matter. Fortunately you came along.”

Rumplestiltskin’s head swiveled around to face her so quickly she nearly dropped her cup. “You consider that fortunate?”

“Wasn’t it?” Belle looked him in the eye. “I mean, obviously the circumstances leading up to it weren’t fortunate, but you arriving was. You saved us all. And I’d much rather be here than married to Gaston.”

Rumplestiltskin narrowed his eyes. “You’re serious.”

“Of course I am. If he’d had his way I’m pretty sure I’d be trapped inside a castle with nothing to do but have his babies and listen to tales of his hunting exploits.”

“Instead you’re trapped inside a castle cooking and cleaning for a monster,” Rumplestiltskin scoffed. “I’m not sure you’ve thought this through, dearie.”

“Mm, you’re not a monster.” Belle swayed slightly. The wine was going to her head and combined with the warmth of the fire in front of her and the warmth of his body next to her she was feeling pleasantly tipsy. His shoulder was right there, so inviting, and she gave into the temptation to lean her head against it. “And you’re far better company than he ever was.”

She could feel him tense up as soon as she made contact but he didn’t move away and she took that as implicit permission, shifting her body slightly so she could lean against him more comfortably, the leather of his waistcoat cool under her cheek.

He didn’t reply to her words, but that was all right. She felt content and comfortable just sitting there with him.

Eventually her eyes started closing and when she opened them again she was surprised to see the fire much lower than it had been. Blinking sleepily she raised her head, taking note of the blanket falling from her shoulders as she did so, and her wine cup now sat with his on the small table with the bowl.

“You fell asleep.” Rumplestiltskin’s voice was low, as though he was afraid to break some sort of spell that had fallen on them. She didn’t think he had moved at all, except to presumably use his magic to conjure the blanket and move the cups.

“Oh, sorry.” Belle blushed.

“It’s no matter.” Rumplestiltskin waved his hand but didn’t meet her eyes.

“I suppose I should be going to bed then.” Belle stood, looking down at his face, watching the flickering light of the fire dancing on his golden skin. “Goodnight, Rumplestiltskin.”

Belle leaned down slowly to kiss his cheek. She hadn’t thought it possible for him to tense up even more than he already had been, but somehow he managed it. Pulling back from him, she turned and left the great hall.

Once she had returned to her room, Belle readied for bed in a daze. It had only been a friendly peck on the cheek, yet she couldn’t get the feel of his skin under her lips out of her mind. His scales had been so much warmer and softer than she had expected.

Lying in bed, she slowly lifted her fingers to stroke across her lips. Her mind was racing and all she could think about was how much she wanted to kiss him again.

~*~

The next morning Belle came downstairs and was shocked to find Rumplestiltskin still in the great hall. He was sitting in the same spot by the fire, turning the now empty wooden bowl around in his hands.

“Rumplestiltskin?” Belle called softly, not wanting to startle him. “Have you been here all night?”

“Hmm.” Rumplestiltskin nodded absentmindedly, still seeming distracted by the bowl.

“I… I’m sorry if I shouldn’t have used that.” Belle was now starting to worry that she’d committed some terrible faux pas. “It just seemed so perfect.”

“It’s no matter, I just forgot I had it.” He seemed like he was going to say more, but before he did so his face abruptly changed expression, a mask dropping in front of his eyes, before he stood to face her, vanishing the bowl as he did so. “But never mind that. Now, tell me little maid, what else are you planning to do to my castle? Hmm? I can’t imagine a little slip of a thing like you hauling in a tree by yourself but that would be entertaining to see.” He pointed at her, turning his back as he spoke.

“What?” Belle wrinkled her nose in confusion. “A whole tree? Why would I do that?”

“You…?” Rumplestiltskin turned to face her, surprise evident on his face before the mask fell into place again and he gestured around the hall with his hands. “Well, it’s just that you’ve brought the rest of the forest inside I assumed a tree would be next. Followed by a pond or a mountain perhaps.”

“Now you’re just being silly.” Belle shook her head.

“You’re one to talk. How is that head of yours after last night, anyway? You seemed rather drunk by the end there.”

“I had one glass of wine, I’d hardly call that drunk.”

“But you… “ He looked confused again before shaking it off. “Never mind. Anyway, you didn’t answer me. What other traditions can I expect?”

“Well, the Solstice always falls around the middle of the Midwinter Festival.” Belle cast her mind back to years past. “The Royal Astronomers would calculate the exact date and an announcement would be made that the sun was returning. We would celebrate with a great feast of food and drink. My father would open the castle and invite all the townsfolk to join us.”

Rumplestiltskin snorted. “That is most certainly not going to happen here.”

“That’s all right, it was never my favourite part anyway,” Belle confided. “It was usually fun for an hour or so, but being around so many people was exhausting.”

He looked genuinely relieved, as though he feared Belle might have invited up the whole population of the town behind his back, and Belle had to hide a stifle a laugh at the image it brought to mind. Somehow she couldn’t imagine her antisocial master taking on the jovial host role her father had embodied for years.

Thinking about those grand feasts brought another tradition to the forefront of Belle’s mind. One she hadn’t thought about when setting up her initial decorations but which now jumped out to her as something extremely important. It played on her mind as she headed down to the kitchen to start Rumplestitlskin’s breakfast.

Once she found herself with a free moment she ventured out into the garden on her quest. Just as she’d hoped, she found the object of her search relatively quickly and cut a few pieces.

Returning to the great hall she scoured the place for the perfect location, settling on just above the doors which she knew Rumplestiltskin often walked through. Then it was just a matter of time. Belle picked up a book and sat down to wait.

Her patience was rewarded about an hour later when she heard footsteps approaching. Quickly putting down her book she moved closer to the doorway, pretending to clean something on the pedestal nearby.

The footsteps stopped and Belle risked a glance up, seeing Rumplestiltskin still a few paces away from the door, his eyes narrowing as he looked up.

“What the hell is that?” He pointed a long finger at the sprig she had affixed above the entryway.

“Hmm?” Belle aimed for nonchalance. “It’s mistletoe.”

“I can see that, but why is it in my doorway? I thought I made it clear that we were not having any guests in the castle.”

“We’re not. What does that have to do… wait…” Belle narrowed her own eyes at him as the meaning of his words sunk in. “You know.”

“I know a lot of things. What in particular are you wittering on about now?”

“You know what mistletoe is for.”

“Poisoning your guests with the berries?” Rumplestiltskin shrugged with clearly false casualness. “Not very festive but who knows what passes for tradition in your backwards little town. Perhaps ritual sacrifice is the climax of your Winter Festival.”

“And that’s why you’re avoiding it, is it?” Belle had noticed how he hadn’t moved a step. “You think I’m trying to poison you?”

“Don’t be absurd. I’m not avoiding anything. This is my castle and I go where I want. I certainly don’t have my comings and goings dictated by a plant.”

“Then why don’t you come through the doorway?”

“Why do you want me to?”

“You know you’re being very childish.”

“Fine.” Rumplestiltskin took a few large steps, stopping directly under the mistletoe and staring directly at her like he was calling her bluff. “Now what?”

“Now it’s tradition that when two people meet under the mistletoe they’re supposed to kiss,” Belle explained. She was unsurprised to see no hint of surprise on Rumplestiltskin’s face.

He kept himself still and Belle realised that he was waiting for her to make the first move. He seemed nervous but not reluctant, which gave her confidence that her actions weren’t unwelcome.

Belle met Rumplestitlskin’s eyes as she leaned up. Her first thought was to kiss him on the cheek, the same as before, but she knew that she wanted more than that. Gathering up her courage she turned her head at the last second, catching his lips with hers.

She felt him pause for a second and wondered how her heart would take it if he rejected her. But then his lips moved and he was kissing her back. The feeling of his lips under hers was heavenly and she closed her eyes as a wild thought ran through her head that she never wanted to do anything but this ever again.

But then a strange sensation started tickling her lips and she pulled back in confusion. Opening her eyes she gasped in shock at the sight of Rumplestiltskin’s face rippling oddly.

“What’s happening to you?” Belle cried in alarm.

“What…?” Rumplestiltskin looked down at his hands, which Belle noticed were also shifting and changing, his usual golden scaled skin turning pink before returning to normal.

“Are you all right?” She reached out for him but he pulled back abruptly, his head shooting up as his gaze fixed firmly on her face.

“You!” Rumplestiltskin pointed at her aggressively. “What did you do?”

“I…I don’t know,” Belle stammered, completely confused by everything that had just happened, “I mean… nothing. I just kissed you. I didn’t mean to…”

“‘Oh, I should have known!” He took another step back, shaking his head. “You told me this was your plan from the beginning but I didn’t listen.”

“Plan? What plan?”

“To drive out the Darkness. Well, it won’t work.” He was pacing now, seeming more and more agitated by the second and Belle despaired, wondering how everything had gone so wrong so quickly.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

“You kissed me!” He turned to face her, practically roaring the words as though they were an accusation.

“Yes!” That was true, but she didn’t understand why he was so upset by it.

“And why would you want to kiss the beast? Hmm! Hmm!” He brought his face close to hers, his eyes boring into her own, while his finger pointed at her chest. “Trying to be the hero and defeat the monster?”

“Rumplestiltskin, please! You’re not making any sense.” Belle reached out for his hand but he darted from her reach, skipping a few steps back. “All I did was kiss you!”

“Right,” Rumplestiltskin scoffed. “And you expect me to believe that you didn’t know what would happen. That with all those little books you like to read you don’t know about True Love’s Kiss.”

“I don’t… wait.” Belle stared at him in wonder. “True Love? We’re True Love?”

“No.” Rumplestiltskin looked away.

“But you just said…”

“It’s impossible,” he spat. “No one could ever love me.”

“But I do!” Belle wasn’t sure she’d fully realised it herself before that moment right then, but suddenly she was more certain of the truth of it than of anything she’d ever known before.

“No, you don’t!”

Something in Belle snapped at his words and she stalked forwards, pointing her own finger at this chest. “No! You don’t get to do that! I know you’re upset about… something, but you don’t get to tell me how I feel or call me a liar.”

Her voice broke and frustrated tears sprang to her eyes as all the heightened emotions of the last few minutes hit her. She turned her head away, not wanting him to see.

She braced herself for another argument but there was only silence. A few seconds later she heard soft footsteps behind her and his voice, much lower and softer than it had been when he was accusing her of terrible things before.

“Are you crying?”

“No,” Belle sniffled.

“Well, now you’re definitely lying.”

Huffing a small laugh, she turned to face him. He seemed to have calmed down and she was glad for it. But she was still confused.

“What just happened?”

Rumplestiltskin sighed. “True Love’s Kiss is very powerful magic. It can break any curse. And being the Dark One is a curse.”

“So why don’t you want it broken?” Belle felt more confused than ever. Being the Dark One seemed like a terrible burden to her, why wouldn’t he want to be free of it?

“I… need it. It’s the source of my power.”

“Right,” Belle nodded sadly. “And power is more important to you than love.”

Rumplestiltskin looked conflicted, like he didn’t have an answer for that question. He opened and closed his mouth a few times but made no reply.

Belle gave him a small sad smile and turned, leaving him alone in the doorway. Walking without conscious thought she found herself in her library, her place of solace that Rumplestiltskin had given her.

Books had been a source of comfort to her her entire life. They also held a wealth of knowledge in their pages. Surely somewhere in this room was information about True Love’s Kiss.

~*~

Belle stayed in the library for the rest of the day and most of the night, only returning to her room very late. She hoped that Rumplestiltskin wouldn’t be upset about her not serving his dinner, but had the feeling that he was possibly avoiding her as well.

The next morning when she came down to the great hall she found Rumpelstiltskin already there. He was sitting in his chair, dressed in one of his spikier ensembles. Their eyes met briefly before he looked away and Belle took a deep breath before approaching the table, a book held tightly to her chest.

“Rumplestiltskin… I…” Belle paused, wanting to make sure her words were right.

“It’s fine, dearie. You can go.” He waved his hand dismissively, barely looking at her, and Belle was thrown off her carefully thought out script.

“What?” She frowned, trying to understand his meaning.

“I release you from our deal. You don’t have to stay here any more.” He turned to face her fully and if she hadn’t known him as well as she did she would have missed the sadness behind the sneer on his face. “That is what you came in here to ask, isn’t it?”

“Of course not!” Belle was shocked.

“Well maybe it should have been.” Rumplestiltskin turned away from her again. “Maybe I don’t want you here any more.”

Belle decided to ignore that, not believing it for a second.

“Listen, I was doing some research in the library.” She placed the book she had been carrying down on the table and tapped it with the finger of one hand before continuing. “And I found a tale of a farmer who angered a witch. She cursed him with a poisoned apple. His wife revived him with True Love’s Kiss but then he ate more of the apple and when she tried to bring him back again it didn’t work.”

Rumplestiltskin snorted. “Maybe she stopped loving him when she realised he was an imbecile.”

“Maybe,” Belle laughed, glad for the moment of levity. “But magical scholars theorise that this is proof that True Love’s Kiss only works once on the same curse. If he’d eaten a different apple then she would have been able to bring him back, but she couldn’t because it was the same one.”

Rumplestiltskin eyed her strangely. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Because if this is true, then we can kiss,” she pointed out eagerly. “True Love’s Kiss already worked once, it has no power any more.”

She had hoped he would be excited by this news, but instead he just looked pained.

“I can’t.” He looked down at the table. “You don’t understand. I can’t risk everything I’ve worked for on the strength of a theory from an old book based on a story that may or may not be completely made up. This is too important to me.”

“And I’m not,” Belle surmised sadly, taking a step back.

“Belle.” His arm reached out to grab her hand before she could go too far. “Please believe me when I say you are the best thing to come into my life in a long time.”

“But there’s something else.”

“Yes.”

Belle sighed and moved back towards him, her arm falling from his grip as she leveraged herself up to sit next on the table next to his chair.

“Rumpelstiltskin, I love you. And I want to be with you. I’d like to kiss you if we can, but if we can’t then that’s all right. Just, please, please be honest with me.”

When he didn’t reply, Belle sighed and stood from the table. This time he didn’t stop her from leaving.

~*~

That evening, as she descended the staircase, she wondered what would await her when she entered the great hall. Would Rumplestiltskin still be there? Would he try to make her leave again? Or would he be avoiding her, holed up somewhere in this vast castle where she couldn’t find him? She wasn’t sure which was preferable.

As she reached the doorway she took a deep breath, steeling herself for whatever she found on the other side.

Pushing open the doors, she stopped in her tracks at the sight that greeted her. At the far end of the great hall, stretching all the way up to the ceiling, was an enormous fir tree, draped with red ribbons and gold tinsel. Candles were carefully nestled in the branches and a cascade of light projected around the room from their flickering flames reflecting off the gold.

She didn’t blink as she slowly crossed the hall to stand next to the tree, afraid that it was a mirage that would vanish if she took her eyes off it for a second. Once she was beside it she carefully reached out a hand, touching the delicate threads that made up the gold tinsel. Looking over at the spinning wheel in the corner, she was unsurprised to see the ivy had been unwound from the spokes and placed on a shelf nearby.

“You said work not related to the festivities was banned, so I thought this would be all right.” Rumplestilskin’s voice came from behind her, deeper and softer than she had ever heard it before.

Belle opened her mouth, feeling almost speechless. “This… this is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

Turning to face Rumplestiltskin, she immediately reconsidered that statement. The twinkling light made his skin sparkle in a way that took her breath away. She also noticed that he had changed into a wine red shirt with matching brocade waistcoat that became him very well.

“Happy Solstice, Belle.” He stepped forward to stand by her side. “I may not be a Royal Astronomer, but I can tell you it’s today. Tonight, if you want to be really accurate.”

“Thank you.” She took his arm gratefully and turned so they were both facing the tree. “This is… wonderful. Whatever made you think of decorating a tree like this?”

He swallowed visibly and stared straight ahead, not looking at her as he spoke.

“I lied before. When I said I had no traditions. The Solstice celebrations were the highlight of our year too. We would go out into the woods and chop down a tree, bring it inside and decorate it. Much smaller than this one, of course. Children would make decorations to hang from the branches of their family’s tree. We didn’t have much so they would use whatever they could find in the woods and any scraps they could get their hands on. Every year I would pretend to mess up a bit of my spinning so Bae could use the yarn…”

He trailed off and Belle held her breath, not wanting to break the spell that had fallen over them. She wondered if Rumplestiltskin was even aware of how much he was sharing with her. When he showed no signs of continuing she plucked up the courage to voice her next question.

“Bae? Is that your son?”

“What?” His head turned to face her, his eyes full of a suspicion that Belle was desperate to banish. “How do you know that?”

“I found the clothes upstairs,” she explained, holding tightly to his arm so he couldn’t retreat from her. “What happened to him?”

“I lost him.” The sad resignation in his voice made Belle’s heart break, but then he continued in a much more determined tone. “But not for good. I will find him again. It’s why…”

The pieces started to fall in place for Belle. “That’s why you need your power? To find your son?”

“Yes.”

“Well, that’s understandable.” Belle stared straight into his eyes, wanting to make sure he understood her words. “And we will. We’ll find him.”

“We?” Rumplestiltskin looked surprised.

“Yes, ‘we’.” Belle emphasised. “I promised you forever didn’t I?”

“You did. But I believe I released you from that deal.”

“Well you’re not getting rid of me that easily.” Belle squeezed his arm gently as a thought came to her. “Do you still have them? Bae’s decorations I mean.”

“Every one.” His voice was quiet.

“Maybe we should put them on the tree?” She hoped he wouldn’t be upset by her suggestion. Or take it as a criticism of his own decorations.

Instead he waved his hand and a box appeared on the table next to him. Belle let his arm slip from her hands as he turned towards it. Opening the lid with a reverence Belle couldn’t ever remember seeing from him, Rumpestiltskin reached in and brought out a wonky star made of sticks held together with rough yarn. Stroking a finger over it lovingly, he reached out and carefully placed it on the tree before reaching back into the box and doing the same with a crudely carved piece of bark that Belle was almost certain was supposed to represent a snowflake.

All in all, around two dozen small ornaments of varying degrees of skill emerged from the box and were placed on the tree. When Rumplestitlskin had finished hanging the last one he stepped back to Belle’s side and they admired his handiwork together.

“Beautiful.” Belle said sincerely, wrapping her arm around his back and leaning her head against his shoulder.

“Bae loved the Solstice.” Rumplestiltskin’s quiet voice broke the contented silence that had fallen over them both. “I haven’t… I haven’t celebrated it since he left.”

Belle winced. “I’m sorry if I brought back bad memories.”

“No, no the memories are good. Thank you for reminding me of them.”

“I’m glad.” Belle lifted her head to look at him, then noticed something else sitting on the table behind his shoulder. “You made mulled wine?”

“Ah.” Rumplestiltskin turned and stepped closer to the carved bowl that she had used previously, filling two cups and handing one to her. “It’s Wassail.”

“Wassail?” Belle sniffed the cup in her hand. It smelled similar to mulled wine in some ways, but the underlying scent was different.

“It’s a spiced ale.”

Belle took a sip. It was earthier than she expected, but pleasantly spiced. She wasn’t sure if it would be something she would choose to drink much of though.

“It’s all right if you don’t like it.” Rumpelstiltskin sounded amused. “It can be an acquired taste.”

“It’s nice,” Belle protested. “And the bowl is beautiful. Did you make it?”

“No, it’s… Well, I suppose you could say it’s a family heirloom.”

“Really?”

“I lived with my aunts as a child and at this time of year we would go Wassailing. We would go from door to door, visiting our neighbours, singing songs and sharing spiced ale from our Wassail bowl. This was theirs, passed down to them through the generations.”

“And then it went to you.” Belle smiled. “Did you take Bae Wassailing with it?”

“No.” Rumplestiltskin seemed to deflate a little and Belle instantly regretted the question. “When Bae was old enough to go he went with some neighbours and their children. I… wasn’t welcome.”

“Because you were the Dark One?” Belle surmised.

“No, I was something much worse.” He blinked then shook his head as if to clear the memories. “But I still filled the bowl and when Bae returned he would sing to me and I would drink from it. And then I would give him a small gift to thank him for his song and the ale. And speaking of gifts…!”

Belle laughed as he took her cup, placing it with his on the table before grabbing her hand, pulling her back towards the tree excitedly.

“Here,” Rumplestiltskin reached out for a small parcel she hadn’t seen before and handed it to her. “Happy Solstice, Belle.”

“Oh!” She looked at the box in wonder and despair. “But I don’t have a gift for you.”

“Belle, you are a gift to me,” Rumpelstiltskin said with such sincerity it took her breath away. “You are the Solstice incarnate, my light in the darkness. Now, please, open it.”

Following his instructions Belle untied the ribbon and lifted the lid on the box to reveal a stunningly delicate gold bracelet.

“Oh, Rumple…” she trailed off, swallowing heavily. “It’s beautiful.”

“It’s infused with my magic.” Rumplestiltskin reached into the box, pulling the bracelet out to clasp around her wrist. “I was doing some research of my own and I found a spell that has the power to block True Love’s Kiss. As long as you’re wearing this…”

“Really?” Belle felt the hope swell inside her. “Are you sure you’re willing to risk it?”

“Yes. Just… promise me you’ll stop if I start to change.”

Belle nodded as Rumplestiltskin leaned down and captured her lips with his. This time there was no tickling sensation, just the glorious feeling of his lips against hers. After a few seconds Belle pulled back just enough to scan his face.

“Well?” Rumplestiltskin asked breathlessly.

Belle stared into his wonderfully familiar amber eyes and smiled. “It’s working. Kiss me again.”

Rumplestiltskin returned her smile and leaned down. This time Belle reached up, wrapping her arms around him as she eagerly returned his kiss while the tree twinkled brightly beside them and, somewhere in the distance, the sun began its journey home.

[shivadh]

Per a discussion in comments, here's a bit of a facecast gallery! I had more than I thought, once I sat down to make a list. Left to right, top to bottom:

Michaelis: When I shared some photos of top tier football coach Jose Mourinho ages ago, someone called him the King Emeritus and the idea stuck, although there are other visual influences as well. Mourinho is excellent visual shorthand, anyway.

Jes Deimos: In my head, Jes is based on someone I went to college with, but early on in the books someone linked me to V Spehar, nonbinary journalist and podcast host, and I love their look for Jes. You just have to imagine the ice white hair.

Noah Deimos: I never had an image of Noah as a teen, but the first time I saw stand-up comic Moses Storm, I went "oh, hello adult Noah." (He's super funny, watch his special "Trash White" if you get the chance.)

Gregory: Fellas, is it weird to base a protagonist's look on a statue of Hadrian's lover Antinous from 1800 years ago? He has such good hair, is the thing. This is a photo of a statue of Antinous I took myself at the Art Institute several years ago.

Eddie: Eddie is one of those characters who I find so compelling to write as a personality that I find it hard to visualize him, but I would be infamous if I left Guy Fieri out of the lineup.

Alanna: okay what you have to understand is that she looks like Natalie Portman but like, very specifically the straightened hair, no frills, Plain Jane phase Portman went through in the late 1990s.

Gerald: This is a photo of a University of Chicago polo team member from 1926 and that's so hilariously specific as an image that it makes me laugh. If it wasn't this dude it'd be JFK, though. Again, the hair is doing a lot of the work here.

Monday: it's time to admit that the amount of Xena reruns I watched while writing my master's thesis may have permanently impacted me. Lucy Lawless was all I could think of when describing her.

Simon: I based Simon in the first book heavily on the mannerisms of Colin Fox as Fritz Brenner in the A&E Nero Wolfe miniseries, because he's perfect, I am not taking questions.

There are a number of people I don't have a facecast for -- Georgie probably most notably, but also pretty much all the Galian contingent, Joan, and most of the Ramblers (Ephraim has a touch of James Dean about him but none of the photos of James Dean look quite right). I do have casts for Caleb and Buck but I couldn't cram all the images in so I'll do that one separately in a day or two.

[etaindelaserna]

Can I ask from this ask game : https://www.tumblr.com/toomanyfandomsthings/749729499738996736/send-me-a-ship-and-a-number-and-ill-tell-you?source=share

No. 2, 10, 11, 12, 15 for Dramione, KakaSaku and SukuIta....Thanks 🌻

Dramione

No 2. Draco's love letters are written on the best pergament one can buy with gold. In addition he has made an effort to charm them to smell like freshly mown grass, because he knows how much Hermione adores the smell. His impeccable handwriting and phrasing are meant to turn these letters into literary pieces of grandeur about the nature of love and how obessed he his with Hermione and when she is finally going to marry him BUT in reality they are discussions about charm and potion theories, books they think the other should read and A LOT OF arguing about the practical application of said theories. There is still a lot of flirting and teasing on Draco's part, which never fails to either make Hermione almost explode or smile with the hint of a blush on her face. Hermione takes her responses very seriously and thus they are always too long, which in return causes Draco to point out, that she had made her point already 3 pages earlier. Since Hermione doesn't really get the hint that Draco is indulging her with these discussions, he at one point had started to include book pressed flowers with his letters. He even extended that to her most read books in the library.

No. 10. They are united by their love for adventure and fantasy shows that have either a certain storytelling or entertainment quality to them. They watched Game of Thrones, Vampire Diaries (of course comparing these vampires and werewolves to the real deal), Westworld, The Walking Dead (but only till season 5), Once Upon a Time (they're both intrigued by how mystical magic is portrayed), Stranger Things, Charmed, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, True Blood, Xena, The Witcher and American Gods. They tried to watch Outlander but Draco was annoyed that Hermione seems to get awefully quiet every time Jamie smiled or smirked or was shirtless, so Hermione watched Outlander, Spartacus and Rome on her own. Draco on the other hand was hiding from her Band of Brothers, Homeland, House of Cards and The Pacific.

No. 11. Draco's first impression of Hermione was, that she seems to be just as snotty and aristocratic in the way she carries herself as he was but without the name or reputation to back it up. She thought too highly of herself, her opinions and seemed to think she was better than anyone else. She seemed to only help others if it benefited her. Hermione thought Draco to be just another rich brat, who thinks Daddy's money is going to solve all of his problems instead of working hard.

No. 12. They don't talk about it, athough Draco is dropping hints and he wants to negotiate what they are going to do for their anniversary, but Hermione says, she's too busy and whatnot. In the end Draco kidnaps her. They are visiting Versailles and the Louvre and he schedules an interview with one of Hermiones favourite authors. Hermione feels guilty for not realizing how much this day means to him and allwos him to take her to a fancy restaurant. Afterwards they take a walk along the Seine and they dance and laugh and drink a bottle of wine. She tells him, she loves him and kisses him and in response he asks her if they now can start working on "Project Baby".

No. 15. Sometimes Hermione whised Draco wasn't so high and mighty but then he wouldn't be Draco and she wouldn't be able to tease him about it. Draco sometimes whished Hermione wasn't so god damn selfless all the time, he whished she would take more care of herself instead of sacrificing everything for everyone.

KakaSaku

No. 2. Kakashi's love letters are basically just post-its or random torn-off pieces of paper which Sakura finds EVERYWHERE: on her desk, her drawer, the fridge, among her medical supplies, sailing out of her clothes or stuck to her backpack. They mostly contain one or two sentences, sometimes just a word or a doodle. But the most emportant thing: they always make her smile. Sakura's love letters are at least two pages long and contain detailed reports about a new medical jutsu she has mastered, a new food item she has tried or the complete mystery of why all of her plants keep on dying. In between she slips sentences about what he would have said or done in these situations. One of Kakashi's ninken has been put on mail duty and is to stay with her until Sakura has finished her reply.

No. 10. Sakura would never admit it but she actually enjoys watching rom coms, period drama or soap operas with Kakashi. Not because she wants to use them as ammo to tease him about it but because they are lighthearted entertainment with some analysis or commentary about the hardships of relationships sprinkled in every now and then. They ease her mind and she adores how invested Kakashi is. It's kinda cute. They watched Bridgerton, How I met your Mother, Ugly Betty, My Secret Romance, True Beauty, Downton Abbey, Poldark, Tudors and Outlander. The more teenage-targeted shows like Vampire Diaries, Never Have I Ever, Reign, Riverdale, Smallville and One Tree Hill she keeps to herself. Kakashi doesn't watch anything if it's not with Sakura.

No 11. Kakashi's first impression of Sakura was that she is just another kid who hasn't figured out life yet and who is still too focused on herself and on superficial things that won't matter in the long run. He tries not to judge her too harshly for her perspective because just like all genin, she'll have to grow up faster then she thinks. Sakura had a hard time believing that this man really was an elite shinobi with a widespread reputation that makes him known, respected and even feared by s-class criminals. He seemed too goofy, yet bored to be their teacher and not really interested in teaching, which enraged her.

No. 12. Sakura debated with herself for a long time whether she should bring up the "anniverseries" topic at all with Kakashi. Not because she thought he was indifferent to it. The contrary: she knew him to be a hopeless romantic. So she felt a lot of pressure to deliver something profound. Kakashi noticed within a week what it was that put Sakura under this much stress and decided to plan little things for them before the actual date: they tried the new ice cream flavor in Konoha's one and only gelato shop, he bought a new board game for Saturday nights, they went to take pictures of them with silly little hats and mustaches, they took a dance class together and tried to paint a portray of each other, which caused Sakura to laugh so hard, she almost peed herself. It made Sakura realise that they didn't have to do anything super extraordinary. So when their anniversary came around, they spent the better part of it assembling a new kitchen cupboard. Sakura cooked Kakashi's favourite dish and in the afternoon they went to the book shop and challenged each other to find the funniest romcom title books. They read them out aloud and whoever laughed first, lost. Sakura lost and Kakashi decided to drag her to a karaoke bar. Afterwards they sat down in the park and watched the stars together.

No. 15. There are times when Kakashi wished Sakura had abandoned Sasuke earlier. Not from her life but from her heart. A lot of her training and strength was a result of not wanting to put the burden of dealing with Sasuke on Naruto alone. Some of her heart was broken and it took a long time to fix the damage. Sakura wished Kakashi wouldn’t try to handle everything by himself all the time.

SukuIta

No 2. Yuuji loves to write love letters. He spends hours deciding on the perfect paper and what kind of colours Sukuna likes or doesn't like. When it comes down to the actual writing, Yuuji isn't a man of huge or many words. He likes to ask Sukuna silly questions such as "Would you still love me if I was a worm?" or "Do you want to be my boyfriend? Yes, No, Please don't check both". Yuuji decorates the letters with little hearts or flowers, sometimes slipping in one of the fotos he's taken of Sukuna while eating or napping with a commentary on the back of it. Sukuna would rather die than admitting that he kind of adores Yuuji's innocent, silly displays of attachment. He still thinks they're a waste of time. If he didn't like the brat, the brat would know. But he doesn't want to be an asshole so he either writes Yuuji beautiful poems or paints something in return. But he never answers Yuuji's letters, which bothered Yuuji at first, but then he read the first poem and still tries to recover from that.

No. 10. Yuuji always thought it would be such a headache to persuade Sukuna to watch ANYTHING with him, let alone comedy horror, body horror or horror with some romance or strong friendships sprinkled in it, but no. Sukuna does complain a lot about the nonsensical plotlines or the lack of gore at times but for the most part he was down to watch What We Do In The Shadwos, Ash Vs. Evil Dead, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, The Last of Us and The Walking Dead. Since Sukuna wanted a little bit more suspense and psychological horror he blackmailed Yuuji into watching American Horror Stories, The Hounting of Hill House and Hannibal. Ulterior motive here being to make Yuuji snuggle up to him. Sukuna doesn't bother watching anything without Yuuji but Yuuji tries to hide the fact that he likes to watch Jane The Virgin, Sex Education and Young Royals when he feels down.

No 11. Sukuna's first impression of Yuuji was that he thought him to be weak and overly concerned with the safety of others to the point of it being not entertaining anymore. Just an annoying brat who lets himself be easily manipulated and who would break under the slightest pressure. And yet said brat was able to control him, which angered Sukuna beyond measure. At least his vessel had a great physique if nothing else. Yuuji on the other hand felt indifferent about Sukuna at first. He didn't know who or what he was only that he wasn't about to surrender his body to him.

No 12. Yuuji thinks anniversaries are important because it’s important to make new memories and also to remember the old ones. Sukuna couldn’t care less but let’s the brat do whatever he likes to do for an anniversary. So they end up in the ice cream shop from where they kissed for the first time and eat ice cream until they feel ill. Afterwards Yuuji drags Sukuna into a nearby park to watch the clouds together. Sukuna thinks it’s silly but he is indulging Yuuji and at least he gets to cuddle with him.

No 15. Yuuji wished Sukuna would stop thinking that Yuuji only likes him for his power. This and that he has zero empathy for everybody else. Sukuna wished Yuuji would finally use his power for selfish reasons and unleash his full potential. That’s something he wouldn’t be able to forgive him.

[localgirlbecomesobsessed]

Xena+vagastrom HCs

Work has killed me this week I’m halfway done through a couple of fics but for now have some fun hcs spspsppss; these are just a couple of things~I’m also so tired so hopefully they make sense

Leo’s pupils dilate like a cats(a side effect from his pact) he’s learnt to control it but if he’s super enthralled or excited they’ll come out; he’s done it a couple of times with Sho & xena and it’s unnervingly cute.

Xena and Leo get matching industrial piercings and immediately regretted it when it was time to go to bed when they realised they’d have to switch sides of the bed. Once it’s healed-ish Leo shows them off online~

Xena has a slight French twinge to her accent, it comes out stronger when she’s drunk or angry.

Sho once made Alan and Leo eat Xena’s food as punishment and they had to be sent to the campus infirmary for severe food poisoning…

Xena has a room in the vagastrom dorms, Alan spent ages decorating it and surprised her one day with it. No one knew he was doing it and Xena cried making everyone panic-especially Alan.

The gang went camping and Alan managed to get them lost for three days until Darkwick sent a team out to retrieve them, luckily the events were all live-streamed on Leo’s insta making it easier to find them. (They lived their Blair witch fantasy.)

Club Rat Xena truther, she did go out a lot before the events of Darkwick and although she doesn’t look it is quite extroverted.

Leo, sho and Xena have crossed paths in a club before-though none of them remember it.

If Xena had a childhood friend from Darkwick it would be Alan 10000%.

Sho likes going to Xena for her opinion-especially when it involves the truck-Xena enjoys helping out with the truck and will help clean or serve customers whenever she’s needed.

After the whole cologne debacle with Hyde, Xena felt insanely guilty and tried to do anything and everything to make it up to Sho, who kept telling her it was fine (but eventually got her to help him with the stall at the hotarubi festival.)

Xena got her arm tattoos as soon as she was 18, desperately wanting to cover up the scars on her arm from the accident: she still loves her tattoos and wants to get a matching one for her thigh (though she is not mentally prepared for how painful that tattoo will be )

In the non-curse no Darkwick au(that is completely in my head and idk if I’ll ever properly write it), Xena and Cathrine are actually roommates (after Cathrine is written off her family registry and kicked out.)

Xena wants to take the vagastrom trio to Paris as well as the Paris alps~though depending if she survives or not who knows if she’ll ever be able to do so.

Between her and Leo, she fell first but Leo fell harder.

Xena has a phobia of driving a car/being in one due to her past trauma, has multiple panic attacks and avoids it at all costs. She’s good with Bonnie, public transport and bike-like vehicles but if it’s car shaped she’ll get a flashback to the car crash and will have a breakdown.

Xena has always wanted to grow her hair out but kept it short for judo, she tries to get Yuri and Jiro to make hair growth serum but yuri told her they had more important things to do (Jiro is making her one stat.)

Xena is quite self conscious of the scar on her face but tries to hide the fact as she doesn’t want it used against her-

To add onto that she’s also always wanted to do cosplay and has tried once or twice but hated the way it looked on her due to her scar.

Sho likes it when Xena or Leo plays with his hair/pampers him, he loves when Xena washes his hair or when Leo shares a bath with him.

Leo is a true crime girlie, listens to the podcasts, docs anything and everything-Xena is also a true crime girlie (Sho likes it as background.) Alan will walk past and overhear what they’re listening to like this •_• .

Xena has really good grades; her aunt used to tell her if she wanted to misbehave she had to have good grades at least (her aunt was trying her best.)

(I can’t remember if mc gets ranked in the exam results) but if Xena was she would be in the top ten.

Leo likes the sound of Xena’s voice and secretly records it to listen to when she’s not around.

Xena is an octopus when she’s asleep and will latch on to anyone or Anything she’s in bed with, she’s secretly clingy but doesn’t like showing it.

Xena doesn’t sleep a lot, she likes to wake up early and go to bed late, she’ll get six hours sleep on a good day or 2 hours on a bad, when she gets too exhausted she’ll crash out for a day or so. (A true insomniac, though Leo has been forcing her to take naps with him)

Sho likes taking Xena (and Leo if they’re a throuple) on surprise dates, especially things they may of never done before.

Xena, Sho and Alan always carry painkillers and cooling packs for Leo’s migraines.

Sho, Leo and Alan always carry pain relief gel and painkillers for Xena.

Alan does spray paint art around the dorms and especially in the attic, he shows Xena and sometimes they’ll just quietly chill in the attic, Alan painting and Xena reading.

Leo has a folder full of pictures of Xena in her normal clothes (aka full blown goth attire.)

Xena does have a cane and uses it sometimes if her legs gets really bad, she forces herself to use it less on campus due to comments from the frostheim students/the temptation to hit them with her cane is too much so she can’t trust herself to walk with it. Before Darkwick she would take it with her everywhere just in case she needed it(she has one that folds up.)

Leo has blackmailed targets to get some cash to buy Xena vintage jewellery/clothes. (Which made Xena swoon.)

Xena become more emotive around Leo and gets nervous he wouldn’t like her anymore if he got bored of her reactions, it had the opposite effect and Leo falls even harder with each crack of Xena’s mask.

Xena gets along really well with Taiga (when he remembers her) and sinostra is probably her second favourite house to work with (vagastrom being the first.)

Xena loves when leo gets jealous and Leo loves when Xena gets angry on his behalf. Though, Xena would never go out of her way to make Leo jealous, but Leo would purposefully cause situations where Xena will want to fight for him.

Xena is quite touch starved and without realising it is somehow always touching her partner in some way.

Xena likes doing Leo’s makeup and they’ll film TikTok’s of her trying different styles on him.

That’s all I have to share for now~if you have any questions or want to know anything else just ask and I’ll try my best to answer ;)

[roads-rise-to-meet-me]

Coral Island Farmer Questionnaire: Xena

Found this template from @coral-nerd and decided I could definitely use a moment to infodump about my girl Xena! ^^ Anyone else have this weird tendency to give their cozy game OC's backstories that...Really don't fit the genre? No? Just me? Oops.

How Does Your Farmer Feel About...

Farming In all honesty, farming might be the thing Xena finds most draining about being the newest addition to Coral Island. She didn't expect growing plants to come with so much...Expectation. A rather naive perspective, admittedly; but one that blindsided her nonetheless. And after she was caught off guard in her first year by the sheer competitiveness of the Harvest Festival, it took no time at all for imposter syndrome to start to set in. And it's endlessly frustrating for her! She spent so many of her early years on this farm that she's working now. Surely she should have picked up some kind of rough skillset, right? But for the first year or so farming is the one task that Xena seeks to get over with as quickly as possible each day, and she finds it hard to take pride in something she feels she is always lacking at. But as more people start to acknowledge her hard work, she learns to hold her head up a little higher year after year.

Mining Never expected herself to care for it much, but Scott's endless quest to restore the museum's collection is a cause Xena readily takes up herself. Thus, she finds herself blazing a mighty trail through the mines impressively fast. And with Scott's tendency to stay closer to the surface, his gratitude when Xena chooses to share her hard won bounty with him becomes rather addictive for her. Also, gold bars are worth a fortune? Seriously, why is she still bothering with crops?

Foraging Foraging is great! Especially when it's after dark and the other islanders are either asleep or cramming themselves into the tavern, leaving the trails outside town mostly devoid of anyone except for her. The islanders she does run into after dusk are usually the ones she clicks with better anyway, and the island is bountiful enough that even the most lightweight haul makes her feel like she's accomplishing something.

Catching Brings her right back to her years as a child on the island catching whatever critters she could get her hands on. It's nostalgic, and reminds her of the years before her own questionable decisions led her far from the only place she ever really was able to call home. But to outsiders looking in, she simply seems to find it fun. And as long as the museum's insect collection grows steadily, no one really minds that she seems particularly taken by this hobby.

Fishing Not as active as catching bugs and ocean critters, and she's a little too impatient for it most days. But it's slightly more engaging than watering crops. So when she's truly bored out of her skull with no time to really get wrapped up in anything else, she'll throw out a few casts. Becomes quite a bit more intrigued by it when she reels in her first big catch; a barracuda.

Ranching For someone so hyper aware of the way she acts in every social interaction, ranch animals are an unexpectedly pleasant escape. They don't expect a performance; they just want food and maybe a bit of affection. Both of which she is happy to provide in exchange for a place to vent out those frustrations she can't bring herself to talk about with anyone else.

Combat After residing in the city for so long with a job that had the possibility of landing her in the literal laps of some morally dubious people, holding her own in a scrap is something Xena isn't a stranger to. It feels a little more refined on Coral Island though, especially after she's made a member of the Band of Smiles. Learning to wield a real weapon instead of her keys threaded through her knuckles or a can of pepper spray has a positive effect on her psyche; especially when she's using her newfound skills to slay monsters, as opposed to warding off sleazy strangers seeking to overstep her boundaries.

Diving It feels like an obligation, but not one Xena is necessarily burdened by. When Xena returns to Coral Island after so many years away, she returns with lessons learned and quite a few knocks taken. The island itself looks like it can relate, and the sorry state of it is the first thing that starts chipping away at the walls of apathy Xena has put up over the past few years in order to get through every single day. It isn't farfetched to say that some part of her hopes throwing herself into healing the island might help her start to piece herself back together in the process.

Interacting With The Islanders It's stressful, for a good long while. There's so many familiar faces, and to Xena most all of them haven't changed a day. But she most definitely has, and not in a way she feels she can talk with all these quaint islanders about. So she makes up stories about college and a dead end finance position at Pufferfish that sucked the life and soul out of her, remembering just enough lingo from her former clients to keep her ruse convincing. It gets easier down the line when she finally finds her place in the community again, and the one person she finds it easiest to talk to learns everything there is to know about her. (And he still wakes up next to her the next day and asks if they can make falafel.)

Other...

What is their favorite building material? Stone. Sturdy. Gives her peace of mind that at least her structures will stand up to the test of time, and she can free her mind to worry about every single other responsibility she has instead.

What is their decor style? The most unholy hybrid of beach and disco you've ever seen.

Who's their love interest? Scott. There's a simplicity about him that Xena very quickly finds herself clinging to; even when she's still making herself walk on eggshells around the other islanders. She's not intimidated by him like she is most others, and his enthusiasm for his field is both infectious and a welcome distraction from her own thoughts and insecurities that she wrestles with daily.

What's their favorite thing to grow? Cranberries. As previously mentioned, it takes her much longer to actually enjoy farming. But she loves cranberry juice. And to be able to juice her own berries that she grew from seed does give her a small sense of pride, even in the early years.

What's their favorite animal? Outside of her and Scott's canine sons from their childless newlywed millennial dreams era? Probably quail. Their absurdly small eggs amuse her greatly when she sees them for the first time, and there is something so distinctly harmless and fragile about those itty bitty birds that makes Xena sort of obsess over them.

Bonus! What Do You Associate With Your Farmer In These Categories...

Color Burgundy. Her favorite color to wear when work still consisted of catching clients in high end lounges.

Season Winter. A little icy, like her. Little to no crops to worry about, and with everyone else mostly staying indoors she feels like isn't missing out on too much of Starlet Town's bustling social scene if she chooses to spend all day in the mines or the ocean instead. Though everyone seemed to notice her missing from the Winter Fair that first year when she was working her tail off to afford her wedding dress. Won't make that mistake twice...

Metal Silver. Makes for sturdy tools that can get her through most anything. I mean, isn't gold rather soft? Who's bright idea was it to make a solid gold pick axe anyway...

[presidentdisastraofgallifrey]

My Fanfiction

Gallifrey One-Shots

Dreams of the Future - Romana has nightmares about things that haven’t happened yet

I am President of Gallifrey - Romana's experiences on Etra Prime

Torture of the Daleks - more Etra Prime

Sleep That Never Comes - Romana and Leela sharing their trauma

The Worst Timeline - Romana is traumatized (on the axis)

The Worst Timeline (Is Relative) - Brax is tortured (on the axis)

It's Midnight Somewhere - Romana is disabled (on the axis)

Easy Way Out - Romana dies (on the axis)

What's Left of Me - Leela is lonely (on alt!Gallifrey)

Touch Telepathy - Romana is disabled (psychically)

Not Like Before - Romana adjusts to life back at home post-series 6

Gallifrey Multi-Chapter

Halfway to Anywhere - AU where the Doctor rescues Romana from Etra Prime (5/?? chapters)

Inhuman Nature - AU where Romana fobwatches herself on Earth post-Etra Prime and misses the whole Time War (1/?? chapters)

Brittle - Romana and Narvin are both disabled (on alt!Gallifrey) (2/?? chapters)

After Gallifrey - Romana traps Leela on Earth to save her from the war and she runs into Sarah Jane Smith (there will be sex in this one) (1/?? chapters)

Doctor Who

Doctor Who? - The show but if Romana left Gallifrey on her own and then lived her version of the Doctor’s life (5/39 chapters)

Child of the Daleks - The horrifying life of that girl who got possessed in Remembrance of the Daleks

500-Year Diary - A series that is just various Doctors' diary entries

The Mechanisms

Can You Be Real - pre-tbi Sigyn leads a mission to stop the completion of the train and discovers Loki, broken and incoherent, in need of rescuing (2/?? chapters)

Xena

The Long and Winding Journey - sort of a fix-it that lets them have a family, and sort of just playing with the timeline because I'm autistic like that (2/?? chapters)

Liveblogs

One: The Time Meddler, The Ark, The War Machines

Two: The Curse of the Cybermen, The Enemy of the World

Three (and Liz): The Ambassadors.........of DEATH

Three (and Jo): The Daemons, Day of the Daleks, The Sea Devils, The Mutants, The Green Death

Three (and Sarah Jane): The Time Warrior, Invasion of the Dinosaurs

Four (and Sarah Jane): The Sontaran Experiment, Genesis of the Daleks, Pyramids of Mars, The Deadly Assassin

Four (and Leela): The Invisible Enemy, Image of the Fendahl, The Underworld, The Invasion of Time

Four (and Romana I): The Ribos Operation

Four (and Romana II): Destiny of the Daleks, City of Death, The Horns of Nimon, Full Circle

Five: Four to Doomsday, Black Orchid, Earthshock, Arc of Infinity, Terminus, The Five Doctors, Resurrection of the Daleks

Six: The Twin Dilemma, The Mark of the Rani, The Two Doctors, Trial of a Time Lord 1, Trial of a Time Lord 4

Seven: Time and the Rani, Dragonfire, Battlefield (in progress)

Gallifrey (Series 1): Weapon of Choice, Square One, The Inquiry, A Blind Eye (in progress)

Gallifrey (Series 6): Renaissance, Ascension

Gallifrey (Standalones): Intervention Earth, Enemy Linees

Gallifrey (Echoes Through Eternity): Damned If You Do

Lists

Wild things that happen in Gallifrey: series 1, series 2, series 3, series 4, series 5, series 6, standalones

[imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese]

For context, Eris Morn and the Drifter are characters from the video game Destiny 2. Both are 'risen' which means they were resurrected with no memories of their past by small magic drones called 'ghosts.' Eris lost her ghost in the Hellmouth and is now mortal. The Drifter still has his ghost, but hates it. He's around 900 years old at this point and hasn't been the best person for most of that time. Miri is my own invention: a regular human who was found at a young age and raised by one of the Drifter's previous crews: smugglers and pirates and generally bad people. Miri is a pirate herself now and, despite having adopted several of his mannerisms, loathes the Drifter intensely. In this scene (from Road Trip, an ongoing series I'm writing) he's only recently rediscovered her after she let him believe she was dead for 30 years.

“Would’a been pretty awful wouldn’t it? If you’d gone to clean up after the match and found me? Dead ‘cuz of you?” She flicked some glimmer into the centre of the table.

The Drifter picked up his cards but his hands shook. Miri sipped her drink with a vicious smile.

“But as it turns out, your game’s pretty fun. I enjoyed it. Might go back again sometime, next time I’m around in the tower. You really should up your security, though. Just lettin’ anyone in to play Gambit like that… I could’a put a bullet right between your eyes so easy.”

“Why didn’t you?” he asked her, his voice cautious and gentle, putting his own glimmer into the middle of the table to match hers.

“Thought about it. Would’ve been cathartic. Satisfyin’. Your ghost would just get ya back up again though. An’ where’s the fun in that?”

The Drifter nodded in acknowledgement of her statement.

“I realized long ago shootin’ you wouldn’t hurt ya much,” Miri said. “Everybody already done that and it wouldn’t even stick. Nah, if I wanted to get back at ya, if I wanted to hurt you in a way that’d be memorable, it’d be so much more effective to shoot myself.”

Eris put her tea down on the table, looking from one to the other. The game was forgotten. The Drifter stared at Miri across the table, his mask gone. The hurt, naked and visible on his face.

“Miri,” the Drifter whispered.

“But I know better now. You’ve changed. Got all squishy… vulnerable. If I really, truly wanted to break you, I know how.” Miri leaned forward on her elbows.

The Drifter swallowed, staring at Miri.

“If I wanna destroy you completely, I wouldn’t shoot me or you."  Miri pointed at Eris.  "I’d shoot her.”  Miri grinned, still staring into the Drifter’s eyes.

The Drifter blinked and Eris watched him transform in front of her. All softness left him, all empathy. He did not stiffen.  His body became more relaxed, not less, in a manner with which Eris was now very familiar. It was the way he was just before or during a battle. His face became a stone mask. He looked at Miri with changed eyes. Eyes that had turned ice cold, ready to kill at the slightest provocation.

Miri threw her head back and laughed.

Eris stood. “This discussion has become unhealthy." She took the Drifter’s hand in hers. "We are leaving.”

The Drifter continued to stare at Miri, waiting for her to make any sudden moves.

Miri sat back and put one foot up on the table, still laughing. “What? Did ya think all we needed to do was talk it out… Uncle Drifty?” She gave the name a childlike lilt. “Have a conversation? Solve our problems with words? Make it all ok?” She ran her tongue along her bottom lip as she slid her head from side to side, like a snake.

“Germaine.” Eris pulled his hand.

He remained coiled, watching Miri, ready to strike.

“I got lots more words for ya where that came from. Want more?” Miri grinned and took another sip of her drink.

The Drifter continued to stare. Miri laughed harder.

“Enough!” Eris shouted, slamming her hand down on the table between them. A wave of soulfire emanated from her, blowing cards and glimmer off the table, pushing both Miri and the Drifter back away from each other, sliding their chairs several feet apart.

Eris pulled the Drifter to his feet. “We are leaving. Now.”

Eris began chanting and the edges of a portal began to appear.

Miri smirked in her chair, both feet on the ground now. Her elbows on her knees, her drink still in her hand. She raised it in a mock toast to Eris.

“Oh hey, wanna know what the best part about playin’ Gambit was for me?” Miri asked the Drifter. 

Eris stood in front of him so she was physically between him and Miri.

He looked back at Miri over Eris’ shoulder.

“When I sent a large blocker over to the other team,” Miri said, her eyes glittering with malice. “And you told me you were proud of me.”

The Drifter looked away so quickly it was as though she had slapped him.

Eris pushed him through the portal.

The echoes of Miri’s laughter followed them into the Ascendent plane.

Link to the full piece on Ao3

Xena’s Share Day

hatred’s such a strong word, isn’t it? a strong emotion. share with us a passage with that invokes hatred. what draws such an intense feeling out of your character? what or who do they despise?

[girl4music]

There’s also the interpretation by a lot of people - non-shippers of Xena and Gabrielle specifically - that because Xena is so heart-hardened in her nature that she’s not a romantic or that she’s doesn’t fall easily. And therefore - she doesn’t fall for Gabrielle first.

To some extent - that’s true. But just because she doesn’t fall easily doesn’t mean she doesn’t fall quickly. And just because she keeps her heart locked up doesn’t mean that she isn’t a romantic at heart.

She does. She is. She develops love/romantic feelings very quickly to pretty much every lover or love interest she has in the show. Especially if they’re women. She just doesn’t know how to express herself on those feelings. But she’s always sack of hammers whipped pretty much immediately. So that interpretation of her not falling for Gabrielle first is just inaccurate. She falls fast. But it’s not easy for her to let herself fall given her past and her identity and her notoriety. She doesn’t wear love on her sleeve but love still rules her. Even in her warlord days… her anger and brutality to her intimate partners is just her incapacity and recluctance to express her feelings in a healthy way.

Those love or romantic feelings are always in her. They’re just buried beneath anger, pride and mistrust.

Much of that being the cause and effect of falling fast.

Nope. Sorry, but I don’t agree that Xena’s not a romantic. She is. She just doesn’t acknowledge it. And I certainly don’t agree that she doesn’t fall fast. I think we’re given a lot of evidence that proves she does. Especially when it comes to her dynamic with women over men. She’s a romantic with women the most. But regardless whether it’s a man or a woman - she falls fast and she falls hard. How or if she expresses her love/romantic feelings is a whole other thing entirely.

I mean you’re talking about somebody who will choose to drag you across Grecian planes by your feet on horseback or kiss your hand as you share your trauma. Xena is just a three-dimensional character.

It may be more so the case of you not being familiar or used to seeing 3D female characters in TV art/entertainment that you can’t accept the dichotomy of the deep intense love displayed between Xena and Gabrielle. She’s a complex character. They both are.

[fazedlight]

7&8 for kara and lena please! :D

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

I was going to talk about a couple of small things (eg pulling from comic canon), but in thinking through it, I'm just impressed/in love with how this fandom exists at all.

This is the largest wlw ship on AO3. It's one of the largest wlw ships ever (not sure how many beat it out, aside from Xena). The sheer talent of all the artists and writers who spend time creating stuff for these two is astonishing to me. The amount of love that goes into each work is astonishing to me.

So something I love with the fandom... is that it exists at all ❤️

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

I don't think there's anything I despise (that is really common, anyway). So I will use this instead as an excuse to share an extremely unpopular headcanon that I don't think I've talked much about before 😌

I headcanon both Kara and Lena as bi most of the time. I'm not sure what we'd get if we went around polling the fandom, but the vibe I get is that a lot of people headcanon Kara as bi and Lena as a lesbian.

My probably-unpopular-opinion is that I feel like Kara is much more likely to be a lesbian than Lena. I feel like her relationship with Mon-El could pretty easily be viewed through the lens of comphet - and while her dynamic with James was decent in S1, they never progressed into a relationship, and so it's hard to tell what that would've looked like.

She reminds me a bit of Gabrielle from Xena (who producer Steven Sears has said was dealing with comphet, though he didn't use the term). Like, Kara - for most of her Earth life - is trying to hide, trying to be Normal, trying to pass, and I think that can easily translate into a sexuality thing. The way Kara crushed on cute guys felt qualitatively similar to how Gabrielle crushed on cute guys.

Lena, on the other hand... yeah, she had basically no chemistry with James, but I totally buy/bi her chemistry with Jack and the intensity of their relationship. That felt very real to me, and sometimes on other Earths that's why I have her end up with him in the (like on Earth-X).

I think some of this dynamic has to do with people's thoughts on the actors' sexualities. But that's just a guess. At the end of the day, anywhere on the sapphic spectrum works for either of them, but I think some of my leanings are different from the common ones in the fandom.

Thanks for the ask!! ❤️

character ask game

[thenotebookwizard]

First Fandom

A few years ago, I would have sworn up and down my first real fandom was Star Trek.

It makes sense. After all, I overcame my dyslexia and learned to read so I could read my mother's Star Trek novels. Pocket Books was churning them out back in the day, and i wanted to read them. She'd read me bits of a few of them, and I wanted more.

I loved watching the show - though that was mostly re-runs.

So, sitting on the floor at the foot of Mom & Dad's water bed, trading correctly read sentences for M&Ms, my mother and I battled. Fought. Yelled. Screamed. Cried. I didn't want to (until I did) and she knew I had to. Once we started using a Star Trek novel, I got much better, much faster.

The first book I ever read was The Vulcan Academy Murders by Jean Lorrah, and it's a book I own many copies of for sentimental purposes.

The first thing I remember writing was in elementary school, and it was a Star Trek story. My uncle let me read his old fanzines. I was on Star Trek BBSes. I had a notebook of Star Trek stories and notes and ideas.

Whelp.

A few years ago, the subject of me, fandom, and fanfic came up. My father (rightfully) pointed out my fandom is my mother's fault, because of Star Trek, and that I ship characters is also her fault. (My mother shipped Gabrielle and Xena and would fight you if you argued with her.)

And I nodded along. "Ayep," I said, "Star Trek is where it began. My first fandom and my first fanfic."

Turns out, I was wrong. My first fanfic and my first fandom were Winnie the Pooh. Smol me had thrown a fit at a shopping mall one weekend, and the only thing that made me happy was a stuffed bear.

Something similar to this one, I believe.

Well, my parents got me that silly old bear and he was my constant companion until it was no longer deemed 'appropriate' for a boy to carry around a stuffed animal anymore. (I frankly don't see the issue, but whatever. I'm still kinda salty about it I guess. Huh. Anyway.)

My father, being my father, decided to read me every story of Winnie the Pooh he could find, including a more modern copy of this book:

I watched all the movies. I watched all the animated movies. I have not seen the 2018 Christopher Robin (yet).

And, at some point, smol me ended up at my Dad's office. In those days, everyone had secretaries, because computers hadn't been really adopted yet, and there was a lot of paperwork to do by hand or by typewriter. Now, my father's secretary was an amazing woman who treated my Dad's kids like she liked us (I'd like to think she actually did) and I know she was very patient with us.

I know this, because she apparently typed a Winnie the Pooh story I dictated to her. Eight pages of Pooh and company negotiating with the bees for fair use and sharing of honey (hunny) and making sure the bees were safe from 'the bad guys' through vague but apparently effective means.

He has this story - my very first fanfic - saved in a file cabinet. In the same file folder I brought it home in.

It appears my mother's frustration with me wanting to be a writer were in vain. I started writing before I could read and had stories in my head before I read my first book.

[danielleitloudernow-writes]

DanielleItLouderNow on AO3

Writes WLW fics for fellow nerds with a dash of angst and sarcasm for that little bit of extra spice.

Loves comments and will always answer (even if it takes a year).

Commissions/Requests

Currently closed

Fandoms Master List

Avatar: Legend of Korra

Criminal Minds

Xena Warrior Princess

Captain Marvel

Life is Strange

Mass Effect

hopefully growing to include Warrior Nun

Originals Incoming

Fic Master List

Korrasami

One Shots:

It is midnight, and the time is passing, but I sleep alone

Paralyzed

Measure the Coefficient of Static Friction Between Us

Fuck Was I

Need You To Be Sure

Coffee Shop Soundtrack

An Apple a Day Keeps Anyone Away (If You Throw It Hard Enough)

Every Last One

Multi-Chapter Fics:

The Consequences of Jello (title may change)

Far From Never

Series:

Bet On It, Baby

STEMinism: A Study (beta'd by the amazing ireallyshouldnt_behere, check them out!)

Living On a Spare

Words Unspoken

Missing

You Stupid Girl

Control

Jemily

One Shots:

The Violets in the Mountains Have Broken Rocks

Profiles and Princesses

All Persons, Living and Dead, Are Purely Coincidental

Everything Was Beautiful and Nothing Hurt

Multi-Chapter Fics:

Gonna Use My, My, My Imagination

In the Crooks of Your Body, I Find My Religion

WarriorBard

Caught

The Light

Get Your Hands Off My Apples

You Came and I Was Crazy for You

Fire Races Under My Skin and I Tremble

I Yield Before Gabrielle

Ramvers

Destruction of Government Property

Do You Wanna Touch

Pricefield

All These Cameras and I Still Can't Capture This Moment

Chaos Theory

Shiara

People Are Quick to Assume We Enjoy Being in Hazardous Situations

Avatrice

With Each Breath

Interests

Reading

Writing

Science

Gaming

Cooking

Music

All forms of nerdiness

Skills

Smut

Fluff

Angst

Emotion

Description

Sarcastic One-Liners

Needs Improvement

Organization

Motivation

Moving from Point A to Point C because Point B is a fucking dick

Finishing

Listens To While Writing

Plus more

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Writing Friends

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Get back into writing

Break into a new fandom (or fandoms)

Finish original works

Finish anything

If you stumbled onto me and wanna scream about writing, awesome! If you stumbled on me and wanna scream about nerdiness, fandom, weird shit, and other interests, maybe check out my main Tumblr @danielleitloudernow

Cheers!