#wow got long this time huh

[slavhew]

28/01/2024

stars don't twinkle moon doesn't shine

big thanks to @nahrgles for finishing this for me after i hit a wall with colors bg and effects- chromatic aberration blew my fkn mind

pre edit transparent version under cut because i spent too much time cleaning it loll

[snezus-christ-risen]

Insult to Injury

Agatha/Rio - 4.1k words - Illness (Agatha)

Debuting what I hope is the first of many AAA fanfics. I had so much fun writing these two and I’ll probably do a second part to this story. I hope you all enjoy this as much as I’ve enjoyed reading all of the fantastic work ya’ll have been putting out! It’s a little messy and there are some NSFW elements. Minors DNI.

~~~

There was something off about the air on that otherwise fresh spring day. It was driving Rio to madness, not knowing what it was or why it was affecting her so strongly. All she knew was that some primal heat drove her forward through the woods, the smell growing stronger with every step she took towards the cottage that stood just beyond the edge of the forest. After spending days apart from her lover, excitement fluttered in her chest at the thought of what state she might find her in upon their reunion. Nevertheless, Rio chose to remain on the scenic route, choosing anticipation over the instant gratification that came with ripping open the fabric of reality and using it as a shortcut.

After a few more steps the scent of sickness snapped into focus, honeyed and intoxicating like an aged brandy. Absent was the heady tang of bloodshed (boo) or the cloying rot of old age; it was something altogether unique and pleasant, drawing her towards the dwelling the same way instinct compelled a bee to the flower fields. Rio took a moment, upon reaching the front door, to shake her body like a dog, hoping to dispel some of the giddiness that had built up during her walk.

Take it easy, she told herself. She will be delicate.

Occasionally Rio needed to remind herself that even at her healthiest, and regardless of her powers, Agatha was still flesh and bone. Just thinking about the delicate nature of her mortal lover was getting her all worked up again, which was the opposite of what she was trying to accomplish. Taking a deep breath, Rio let it out slowly and knocked on the door. She surmised, from the lack of response, that the occupant within was unconscious. Certainly not dead; she would have known if that were the case. Directing a breeze to push the door open, she stepped inside.

There was a bit of a chill in the air, and Rio soon saw why; one of the windows was half-opened, its tattered curtains rippling in the breeze. Though it was technically spring, they had just had a snowfall last week, and the day outside was brisk. Buzzing with anticipation (and a little annoyance at the window situation), Rio crept across the threshold with the quiet energy of an owl readying its talons for a mouse.

She could see a figure sprawled across the bed. Rio closed the space between the doorway and the bedside in just a few strides, eager to investigate the scene. Agatha lay there in a tangle of damp sheets and disheveled hair, breathing noisily through parted lips. Her nose was tinged red and glistening around the nostrils, the skin chapped from rough and repetitive contact. Her skin, flushed pink with fever, peeked through the bindings of her bedding, inviting Rio to touch. But she wouldn’t… not yet…

Grinning devilishly, Rio produced a bushel of baby’s breath in her upturned palm. Her smile faded when she remembered that Agatha was allergic; she didn’t want to kill the woman, at least not before she could have some fun with her. She waved the little white flowers out through the open window before conjuring up an unassuming yarrow. Giving her newest creation an once-over, she identified the perfect leaf… there… and plucked it. It looked tickly enough to get the job done without triggering an allergic reaction. Agatha would already be miserable about taking ill, without the added burden of having to contend with her allergies. Rio didn’t see the point of adding insult to injury.

Twirling the leaf between her thumb and forefinger, she tested it along a naked stretch of thigh. Her leg hairs rose in response to the stimulation, a reminder that, as much as Rio craved her death, there was so much she enjoyed about the complex simplicity of her living flesh - its heat, its softness, the way it reacted when she touched it like this. She continued dragging the leaf along Agatha’s leg, scaling over a twisted hump of blanket before sliding down the exposed curve of her hip. After working her way up inch by inch, over sections of bedsheets and skin, Rio finally settled the frond against Agatha’s throat like a knife.

It was here that she finally stirred, her hand moving just enough to call Rio’s attention to the lace handkerchief she was clutching like a security blanket. Her eyes lit up at this delightful observation as she lifted the leaf from her skin, holding completely still until Agatha settled again with a sigh. Then Rio sat down on the edge of the bed, moving slowly to avoid disturbing her. Disturbing her was still on the agenda, of course, but for that she had something more fun in mind. Leaning in with the concentration of an artist putting the finishing touches on her work, Rio swept the tip of the leaf up the length of Agatha’s nose and back down again. As soon as she got to the reddened rims of her nostrils they twitched, the feather-light touch tickling just enough to make Agatha scrunch her nose. She made a weak attempt to swat away the source of her irritation, brow furrowing as she turned her face into her pillow.

Rio was considering her next course of action when Agatha lifted her head slightly, eyes still closed, lips parted and quivering, and eyebrows raised expectantly. Mesmerized, she watched as Agatha panted softly before plunging her face back into the pillow. The bed rocked gently as she muffled two sneezes - “ih’TSHh!-h’TSHhh’uh” - followed by a long, congested moan.

It was Rio’s laughter, more than the sneezing, that boosted Agatha past the threshold of semi-consciousness. She was still working on opening her eyes all the way, but had the wherewithal to bring her handkerchief up to cover her nose when she turned to look up at Rio. The latter flashed her a cunning grin as she actively fought against the urge to straddle her.

“Bless you,” she purred, tapping her forehead with the tip of the leaf. “What do you have brewing in here?”

She would have stroked it down the length of her nose again if Agatha didn’t grab it immediately, her reflexes surprisingly sharp for someone still waking up in a fever haze. They both held onto it for a moment before Rio released it, hands and eyebrows raised in mock surrender. Agatha immediately tossed it aside, but it didn’t go far, landing on the edge of the bed next to Rio, who brushed it onto the floor. After a brief and unsuccessful struggle to sit up, Agatha settled for propping herself against her pillows, where she proceeded to stare at Rio in a state of mild delirium.

“I think I have a fever,” she said, unexpectedly forthcoming.

Rio opened her mouth in a silent gasp, feigning surprise. Leaning forward, she cupped one hand against Agatha’s cheek, using the other to gently pry her hand away from her nose. With the handkerchief out of the way, she could inspect it to her satisfaction. How much abuse had it taken before she arrived? It seemed to be running relentlessly, the skin around her nostrils painfully raw from all the wiping. Agatha was always so rough with her nose, like she was punishing it for daring to act according to its nature. More than happy to provide the tender loving care it was missing, Rio gave it a kiss before using the pad of her thumb to gently swipe the mess from her upper lip. Agatha shivered as she squinted up at her in silent indignation, too lethargic to object to her fussing.

“My love,” Rio cooed, unable to mask her delight. “You’ve caught a chill.”

“Don’t sound so excited,” Agatha deadpanned, wincing as her voice grated against her throat.

“I can’t help it,” she said, smirking when Agatha jerked to the side to cough before burying her nose in her handkerchief. “Just look at you, you’re pathetic. It’s beautiful.”

Agatha stopped blowing her nose to glare at her. She started to say something but quickly changed course, the catch in her breath and her crumpling expression announcing a more pressing need. It was terrible timing, having just been called pathetic; her ego didn’t want her to back down without a fight, but Agatha knew she didn’t stand a chance against this tickle. Waving her handkerchief like a flag of surrender, she brought it back to her face just in time to smother an itchy-sounding “hiih‘ISHHhyoo!”

Rio watched hungrily as her chest rose and fell, attending to every little snag and pitch change in her breath. Agatha had the tendency to sneeze in pairs, but sometimes the second one needed a little more time to come to fruition, which drove both of them crazy in different ways. When she finally managed to draw a solid breath she held it, nostrils flickering expectantly, before releasing it in an aggravated huff. Rio hummed with sympathy, knowing how much she hated losing a sneeze once it got started. Agatha finished blowing her nose, the crackling rush of loosened congestion quickly giving way to airy, unproductive blows. When she tried to breathe through her nose again, Rio could hear the air squeaking as it struggled through inflamed passageways. Rising from the bed, she padded over to the kitchen, stopping to make a show of closing the open window along the way.

“Where are you going?” came Agatha’s voice, meek and plaintive, from behind her.

“Not far,” she said, infuriatingly vague.

Agatha sank back against her pillows, too tired to pry any further, and watched with drowsy indifference as Rio staged a hostile takeover of her kitchen. Filling the kettle with water, Rio placed it on the trivet before surveying the items on the shelves. She trailed her nails along a row of jars as she contemplated her selection, and every now and then she would make a comment and laugh to herself. When she found what she needed she sat down at the table to prepare her ingredients. Periodically she found her gaze wandering over to check on Agatha, who was drifting in and out of sleep.

As soon as the kettle began whistling Rio removed it from the stove, pouring the water over the satchel of fresh herbs and letting it steep. Agatha was snoring steadily now, which helped Rio to feel a little less guilty about waking her up earlier. She got so distracted watching her that she almost forgot about the concoction cooling on the counter. Rio knew it would be bitter, so she added a generous amount of honey to help with the taste. She took a sip before recoiling with a full-bodied shudder; it was definitely sweet enough, but it was also a whole bunch of other things that Agatha was going to hate.

Rio was finishing up in the kitchen when Agatha woke up again, looking confused as she wiped her mouth, then her nose with the back of her hand. She had managed to glean enough energy from her short nap to sit upright, but that was as far as her body would allow her to go. Her sinuses adjusted quickly to the change in altitude, congestion softening and shifting and - “h’heh!” - tickling. Grabbing a clean handkerchief from the nightstand, Agatha tried to nip it in the bud with a series of forceful blows. While it left her feeling woozy, it also managed to scratch at the deep, quivering itch in the center of her face, reducing it to a mild annoyance. Just in time for her other mild annoyance to return.

“What do you have there?” she asked as Rio strolled over, sucking honey off her fingers one by one.

“Poison.” She gave her most menacing grin, short of showing her true face. “To put you out of your misery.”

She handed the cup to Agatha with a wink, her smile softening as she rejoined her on the bed. Agatha stared into the murky amber contents of her cup before glancing back up at Rio, expression unsure. Snorting out a laugh, Rio gave her a nod of encouragement.

“Drink,” she insisted. “It shouldn’t kill you, but it might help you feel better. I make no guarantees either way.”

Agatha hesitated before bringing the cup to her lips, testing the temperature of the liquid. Finding it suitable, she took a sip, closing her eyes tightly and screwing up her face as she swallowed. Not only was her throat raw, but the drink had a pungent, peppery aftertaste that made her sinuses prickle. Shaking her head, she tried to return the cup, but Rio resisted, folding her arms and leaving Agatha with no choice but to hold it.

“I know, it’s awful,” Rio sympathized, misreading the situation. “But I think it might help with the-”

“Would you just t-take it, please…”

As soon as Agatha spoke, Rio realized her mistake. Her voice only ever sounded that breathy and desperate for two reasons, and Rio was almost certain she could rule out one of them. Moving quickly, she took the cup from Agatha, who managed a wobbly look of gratitude before steepling her hands over her nose. Her shoulders scrunched up with the first palm-drenching release and Rio shivered, finding herself, as she often did, envious of her lover’s hands.

“hih’tCHSHh!-u… h’hiih!” The tickle teased her for a bit, making her breath flutter indecisively, before culminating in a spraying conclusion. “hihh’YSHHhhieu!”

With how messy those sneezes had been, Agatha was in no hurry to lower her hands. She kept them locked in place, attempting to rein in the persistent flow of congestion with slow, careful sniffles as she cast about for a handkerchief. Spotting the lacy white square crumbled up between the bedsheets, she reached for it, keeping one hand cupped protectively over her nose. Rio beat her to it, seizing the handkerchief with a victorious cackle.

“What’s the matter?” she asked, dangling it in front of Agatha, just out of reach. “Bit of a mess on your hands?”

Rio knew she was poking the bruises of an already wounded ego, but it didn’t stop her from looking aggrieved when Agatha leaned forward to yank the handkerchief from her hand. Clutching at her nose through the fabric, Agatha pressed her other hand against her lover’s inner thigh. Rio gasped at the unexpected pressure, then froze as she dragged it down her leg, wiping off the fluids that coated her hand.

“Consolation prize,” Agatha said, giving Rio a knowing look. “I don’t want you feeling left out.”

Then she started blowing her nose, loudly, using so much force that she had to secure the handkerchief in place with both hands. It was a classic Agatha move, an obnoxious attempt to secure the last word, but for once, Rio was speechless. Not only was she flustered, but there were so many distractions vying for her attention, scents and sounds and sensations swirling around her like leaves in an autumn breeze. Agatha was right - she was jealous, longing to switch places with the cloth that covered her mouth and nose. Rio closed her eyes, held her breath, and stroked her own leg, probing at the slightly damp spots in the fabric as she tried (and failed) to ground herself.

When she opened her eyes again, it was because Agatha sniffled and it sounded so close. There she was, taking her cup back from Rio with the dexterity of a natural thief, her careful efforts to avoid detection thwarted by her own reflexes. When she caught Rio watching her she smiled coyly, lifting the cup in a mock toast instead of pitching its contents to the floor as she had originally planned. Then she placed it amongst the clutter on the bedside table, where it would most likely sit, forgotten, for a while.

Before Rio could voice her disapproval Agatha was intercepting her lips, slamming against her body like a wall of pure heat. She needed a moment to process this pleasant surprise, but once she found her bearings Rio kissed back, threading her fingers through dark tresses and using them to tug Agatha closer. Hands that had known nothing but restraint since she first arrived were free to wander the fevered landscape of her body. It was a bit distracting how much skinnier Agatha felt since the last time they touched like this. How long had she been unwell for? Had she been eating enough — or at all? Questions she wished she had asked when she first arrived kept popping into her head, making it difficult to focus on the task at hand.

Whatever surge of energy compelled Agatha into her arms seemed to dissolve as quickly as it came. Unfortunately, being sick didn’t make her any less stubborn. She refused to listen to what her body was trying to tell her, choosing instead to push through the discomfort. Even with the blankets and their combined body heat Agatha couldn’t stop shivering, and she kept whirling away to cough, catch her breath, or swipe impatiently at her nose. Rio always welcomed her lips back with enthusiasm, but she was starting to question her ability to handle what this was building towards. Things between them had the tendency to burn out of control pretty quickly, and even if they were capable of practicing restraint, neither of them wanted to. As much as she wanted to keep going, Rio decided it was time to call a moratorium on their activities after the next interruption.

It happened sooner than she hoped, but not as soon as she expected. Agatha gradually disengaged from the kiss, turning away not with a flourish like all the other times but with slow, hazy uncertainty. One of her hands migrated up Rio’s body, reemerging from her clothing to hover near her nose. Rio removed her other hand from the side of her face and held it as if it were a small, injured animal, rubbing her thumb against her palm as she watched and waited. The handkerchiefs were lost to the bed sheets again, but Rio couldn’t tear her focus away long enough to look for one, and Agatha didn’t even bother trying. She was starting to resent her growing reliance on them, and while her hand was hardly a suitable alternative, she was a few degrees Fahrenheit past the point of caring.

The first sneeze tore out of her - “ET’SHhhiew!” - with unexpected force, carrying with it the weight of her building frustration. It left her hand soaked and her head reeling, and in pursuit of something solid to hold onto she reached instinctively for Rio. Agatha turned into her shoulder with a jagged inhale, releasing a shamelessly desperate “ihy’EESHhew!” that sent shivers through her body.

“Salud,” Rio said, somehow sounding both impressed and apologetic as Agatha slumped back against the headboard in a daze. She didn’t get sick in the same way mortals did, so while she found the process captivating (and arousing), it was hard not to experience something akin to survivor’s guilt in situations like this. “You know, sweetheart, we don’t have to keep going.”

Agatha didn’t respond, nor did she tend to her nose right away, choosing instead to let it trickle down to her lips while she waited for the dizziness to pass. Finally managing to make herself useful, Rio fished a clean handkerchief out of the sea of miscellaneous items on the nightstand. She used it to pat gingerly at the mess on her upper lip, cleaning up what she could before Agatha took over control of the cloth. As always, her touch was a lot rougher, impatient even, and she gave her nose a hasty blow before tossing the handkerchief aside. Despite her obvious misery, or perhaps because of it, she was determined to pick up from where they left off. When she leaned back in for a kiss Rio stopped her, pressing her hand to her chest with a gentle look. Agatha sat back, looking confused and a little hurt; it was rare for Rio to rebuff her advances.

“What do you say we take a break and get you into some warm clothing, hm?” Rio suggested, softly stroking the hair that spilled over her shoulders. “Maybe have a bath, or something to eat?”

Though Agatha chose not to answer, the increasingly complex mosaic of emotions on her face said plenty. Rio realized, too late, that she failed to explain the reasoning for her rejection. She didn’t want Agatha getting the wrong idea and thinking she was disgusted by her symptoms. It wasn’t that Rio kept her interests a secret; even if she hadn’t stated them explicitly and repeatedly, she would have thought the way she clung to Agatha during allergy season or whenever she got sick spoke volumes. While it wasn’t her intention, her dedication to transparency only seemed to make Agatha feel more self-conscious. She valued her power and control, so to willingly surrender both in order to make a mess of herself in front of her girlfriend was something she was still getting used to. Hoping to prove just how unbothered she was, Rio leaned in to give her a kiss, but it landed on her cheek as Agatha turned her head, redirecting a tearful glare meant for Rio towards the nightstand.

“Sweetheart,” Rio sighed. “Please don’t be like that. You know how much I want this - want you, but my love… you’re aren’t well. I don’t want to hurt you while you’re all–”

“Pathetic?” Agatha spat, still refusing to look at her.

“… sick,” she finished, frowning. “Agatha, you are burning up with fever, and I don’t think this isn’t helping.”

“Oh, please.” The other witch waved dismissively before folding her arms across her chest. “You know I run hot.”

“Not this hot,” Rio said, but Agatha was making it clear through her increasingly defensive body language that she was finished with this conversation. Rio sighed, anticipating more resistance as she returned to the topic of dinner. “Sick or not, you still need to eat. Do you have an appetite for anything besides me?”

She hoped the joke would lighten the tension, but if the hard set of her jaw was any indication, Agatha was not amused. An uncomfortable mixture of emotions was simmering just below the surface, but instead of taking time to process them she defaulted to anger, her comfort zone. She turned to glower at Rio, who could tell from the look in her eyes that she was about to say something hurtful.

“Did you come here to fuck me or take care of me?” she asked, her venomous tone undercut by the tremor in her voice. “Because you’re doing a terrible job of both.”

Rio felt her heart sink, but tried her best not to show it. Given how miserable Agatha was feeling, she was trying to be understanding, but her patience was starting to wane. Her gaze flickered over to the drink she had made, cold and abandoned on the nightstand, as she considered her next move. She could retaliate verbally, but she was afraid of what might come out of her mouth if she opened it. She could just fucking leave, if that was how the ungrateful witch felt - but she knew it wasn’t, not really. Besides, Rio didn’t want to leave. What she wanted was to stay and take care of her ill (and ill-tempered) girlfriend, but she decided that first she would go for a walk. Whatever was happening between them right now felt heavy and menacing and charged, like the air before a thunderstorm, and Rio feared what might happen if they stayed in the same space together for much longer.

It all dissipated in a dizzying rush the moment she stood up and started walking towards the door. She barely made it three steps before Agatha was scrambling to disentangle herself from her blankets.

“Wait!” she squeaked, stumbling out of bed to trail Rio in a misty-eyed panic. “I didn’t mean it, my love. Please, don’t go.”

It was the genuine desperation in her voice that made Rio turn around, just in time to catch Agatha as her legs gave out. Rio held her in a secure embrace, supporting her full weight until she stopped shaking. Then she half-carried her back to the bed, peppering Agatha with soft kisses and words of reassurance as she helped her lie back down. As soon as Rio crawled into bed beside her Agatha burrowed into her chest, her tears seeping through her clothing as they started flowing in earnest. Every now and then she would whimper something, but with her voice failing and her congestion worsening by the second, Rio could only guess at what she was saying and respond accordingly.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Rio said, holding Agatha close. “I’m not going anywhere.”

[sluckythewizard]

[PUT INTO PLACE, TIED DOWN AND ARRANGED, AND IS NEVER THE SAME, AGAIN.]<-listen to my favorite songs. VAMPIRES ARE WONDERFUL ARENT THEY. THE FLESH IS SO MUCH MORE DURABLE. SO MUCH STRETCHIER THAN HUMANS. THE STRESS DOESNT KILL A VAMPIRE THE SAME WAY IT DOES A HUMAN. YOU CAN TAKE THEM APART THREAD BY THREAD AND LEAVE THEM WIDE AWAKE WITHOUT WORRY OF THE BRAINMATTER SPOILING UNDER VINEGARY AGONY.

[thecurtainswereblue]

oops my hand slipped

[deus-ex-mona]

my five surviving braincells when something remotely good happens:

[fatdogboys]

Fat Geppy thoughts...Imagine him being assigned to a more crowded, but still dangerous area-He patrols the streets, makes sure the citizens get home safely, solves disputes and fights off bandits. At the end of the day he goes back to the silvermane guard outpost, stuffs himself full after eating nothing for almost an entire day, and passes out-Sure it was a big meal, but he spent all that energy on his job!

Then-Even as he remains stoic and polite, the local citizens cant help but admire him. They talk to him and genuinely worry about his wellbeing, if he's not cold or hungry!An old lady knits him a scarf(even though Gepard is used to the cold,it still feels nice),and make sure he gets properly fed. A freshly baked cake here, a pastry there, a whole roast or a bowl of rice...Gepard is far too polite to refuse anyone, and the citizens have no idea how much he ate, so they just keep putting more and more food in his hands as he goes from alley to alley, door to door...

He still eats his meals after he comes back, routine too ingrained into his mind even as he has to undo his belt and rub at his straining belly, going to sleep stifflimg burps and slipping into a food coma-Which, seems to improve his sleeping schedulez actually. And the people are all far too kind to ignore, or to turn down their gifts. So as much as his stomach seems to hurt now, Gepard decides to endure it, for everyone's sake(And maybe because he secretely likes it but shh)

Eventually, his stomach capacity grows, and his appetite does, too. Instead of going to sleep painfully full, he handles it quite well-Instead of undoing his belt, he ends up buying a new one when the old one feels too tight even on an empty stomach. He stares at himself in the mirror, grasping at his soft stomach and impressive butt with a beet red face. And the more time passes, the more the people in the area adore him.

Gepard clutches at his stomach, round and taut from the food, but still drooping and soft and jutting out. His armor had to be resized two times by now, and it doesn't seem like he's stopping anytime soon. He walks the streets, knowing that even though he runs significantly slower now, he can take on whole hordes of bandits with his bulkiness. He is fat and nurtured and cared for, the appreciation of each citizen showing on his widened hips and heavy step.

The wider the wall, the more people it can protect. And Gepard was going to get wide.

[ha-youwish]

i know twewy really isnt the greatest when it comes to subtlety but man neo really just goes “The Next Scene Will Contain Character Development” huh

[surrealismhorror]

@ed you in the replies on my post then realized that was the worst possible way in the world to communicate with another person. Anyway did you say pathologic TLT AU 👀??

HEHE YES a lot of it is very loose thoughts but I think these series connect so well thematically that it's very fun for me to think about so far what I have is;

Second house: Necro: Aglaya, Cav: Block, not super solid on the placement of these two but the military format fits and I think the idea of a necromancer and cav who don't get along but are Super dedicated to their duty and are both top of their field would be an interesting dynamic

Third house: Stamatin twins, Peter as the necro and Andrey as the cav, these two are so Tridentarii coded it's ABSURD, I think the way they each view the polyhedron would be interesting to transfer towards necromancy, Peter is capable of insanely powerful necromancy but it takes a 'miracle' to achieve it, I also think the parallels between Naberius and Farkhad could be interesting as well so I'd like to throw him in there somewhere, maybe he met Bab's fate earlier on as a botched lytorhood attempt or perhaps Andrey wanted him out so he could be cavalier prime dunno. Not sure if they would become a lyctor or not, I feel like they'd both be all for the process but given how doomed all their projects are I feel like it just wouldn't end up working out, or at least not in the way they want it to

Fourth house: Capella, Khan, and Notkin are all kind of currently rotating positions for this one, I think Capella and Khan's idea that they need to start on this predestined path and be great leaders already despite being literally children and how this indirectly pushes Notkin into that as well is very 4th house like

Fifth House: I think I'm putting Necro Artemy and Cav Rubin here, I think Isidor was the necromancer prime with Rubin as his cav but when he died that got shifted to Artemy, I think his nature as a humble makes Rubin well suited for a cavalier but I think he'd have the same internal conflicts he does normally about Artemy being suddenly given Isidor's role, and Artemy having his same personal journey about his role. I do think Artemy becomes a lyctor though and the more I'm thinking about it is probably one of the better adjusted ones in this au?

Sixth House: Necro Daniil and Cav Eva, you KNOW Daniil would go crazy not only for necromancy in general but the concept of lyctorhood, complete and total mastery over death? Sounds great to him sure hope there aren't any tragic drawbacks! Ultimately I think Daniil isn't capable of becoming a lyctor without a push and I think Eva ends up sacrificing herself for that because she thinks it's their destiny so Daniil ends up getting what he originally wanted but with a lot of guilt attached. On a goofy silly note I think Eva's not actually that good of a cavalier she was just the only one Daniil could get along with

Seventh House: Necromancer Grace is here :) sorry despite this literally being my favorite house that's all I've got dfgdfgkh

Eighth House: Not sure for this one either honestly, leaning towards the Saburovs for their themes of judgement and religious control, regardless I think Katerina in this au is maybe not full on pretending to be a lyctor but definitely still has the issue of trying to seem more powerful than she is

Ninth House: Necromancer Clara and her Cavalier, her twin sister also named Clara isn't that crazy? Nobody's seen the 9th house twins in the same place at the same time and Clara does become a lyctor later on so was she always a lyctor? who's to say. I think in this au the locked tomb contains something more in line with The Powers That Be or perhaps even further The Ones That Executed The Whole Thing but I'm not sure beyond tying it in to Clara's meta awareness, plus she would Thrive in the 9th house's faux Catholicism environment, I know she goes hard with the skull paint

Other Misc Things:

Mark Immortell as John, what if god was a theather kid would that be fucked up or what

Simon was a lyctor and the Kains are definitely doing some fucked up shit to try and reachieve that

I'd like the blood of eden to be in this au somehow and I'd like the fellow traveler to be in this au somehow, that's as far as I've gotten with both those thoughts

I think Lara and Aspity both have a lot of good potential roles in this au I'm just not sure where to put them exactly

any sort of plot stuff is VERY vague rn, canaan house setup at the start I like thinking about and I'd like to tie the sand pest in Somehow

Maybe the polyhedron can host a soul for literal real this time

Anyways this is all extremely messy I just love the way these two series potentially blend together it's very fun for me dkgjdfjg

[astrxealis]

me rn having the biggest hots for leon kennedy and astarion sorry LMFAOOO <3

[theonelcl]

Getting stopped by people mid-sentence to say you're using too big of words is wild. People really be out here interupting you for saying "whereas".

Yeah sorry I forgot to mention I actually have a degree in talk good, sorry if you can't handle that bub.

[martyrbat]

[ID: tags by @clarkcvnt that read, “#prev you gotta watch the batman (2022) #minus the hairlessness robert pattinson as bruce is your type #well assuming that i accurately assessed that (one of) your types are pathetic emo looking guys who need to get plowed #he's lacking in the body hair department but otherwise !!!” END ID]

RICHIE YOU CANNOT CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS.....

[yay-depression]

it is so silly when ppl are like “transitioning as an adult should be restricted/illegal because it’s not medically necessary and the results are permanent!” bc like… we do so many things in modern medicine that aren’t strictly necessary & have permanent outcomes and yet… we do them.

my mom went in for a voluntary corrective knee surgery to remove part of her knee. my dad didn’t need to have his stomach removed, he chose to do that. there’s a content creator called footlessjo who chose to have a below the knee amputation. people everywhere ask their doctors for gastric sleeve surgeries, or corrective eye surgery. not to mention almost of these surgeries have a higher regret rate than transitioning.

if we only did medical procedures or treatments when people were dying the quality of life for everyone would go down. if we trust other adults to make permanent decisions regarding things like whether they should keep an organ or a limb, then there’s no reason not to trust trans people who want to medically transition.

[mieczyhale]

one of the guys that runs a reaction channel i've been watching for ages just announced that they're ending the channel next year bc he got a job offer and he's getting married and he's thinking about his family and his future and like...

my son in christ you are 21

i literally want to fucking die

[scienceismygirlfriend]

Reading asks:

2. Flops! Or 9. Compels me tho

2. flops! i consider this one a flop because i really wanted to like it BUT. i did not enjoy Things In Jars. it had a great premise, and i love a ghost sidekick as much as the next guy, but it just did not come together for me. and the most frustrating this is that the things i didn't enjoy about it don't seem to be the things that bothered anyone else who didn't like the book so i didn't even get the cathartic release of reading the two star reviews of the book!!

9. compels me tho: this is maybe a goofy answer but i read the first dinotopia children's novel (Windchaser) while on a road trip and it's pretty simple and predictable but DINOSAURS THOUGH. i don't know why i never read this as a child (i devoured A Land Apart from Time) but i know i would have been soooo annoying about it if i had. it's cute!

[livwritesstuff]

i went on a deep dive of the Steve & Hopper ao3 tag yesterday and and it got me thinking about what would happen if Chief of Police Hopper ran into Steve and Eddie while he was on patrol after pseudo-adopting Steve, and it’s been long enough that Hopper is sort of a safe-person for Steve so Steve goes into full-fledged bitch mode when Hopper tries to pull cop stuff on them, and Eddie (who knew about none of this because Steve is a chronic under-sharer) is so totally baffled.

He’d spent years watching Steve sweet-talk his way out of trouble. Even before they started hooking up it used to drive Eddie goddamn insane, because if (when) Eddie pulled any of this shit Steve gets away with, he’d be totally screwed, but all Steve has to do is flash a sheepish grin and run a hand through his hair once or twice and say, all baleful, “I really didn’t mean any trouble,” and he’s home free.

It has its perks though, or so he's learned during his last few months of hanging around with Steve, so when Steve and Eddie’s make-out session is interrupted by the tell-tale red and blue lights of a cop car pulling up behind where Steve parked the Beemer a few hundred yards down a maintenance road, Eddie’s not all that worried. In fact, he’s got a pretty good amount of faith in Steve’s ability to spin up some story to keep them out of any real trouble, and as Chief Hopper ambles over to them, Eddie prepares himself for a whole show of, “Yes Chief, sorry Chief, it won’t happen again Chief.”

So imagine Eddie's complete and utter surprise when Hopper barks, “Hey, morons! What the hell do you think you’re doing?” and Steve only rolls his eyes and says, “What’s it to you?”

Eddie feels his jaw drop.

“Steve,” he mutters through gritted teeth. He tries to elbow Steve into shutting the hell up, but he misses because Steve has already taken several steps forward to meet Hopper, his face turned up in a kind of defiance Eddie doesn’t think he’s ever seen on him before.

“What’s it to me?” Hopper repeats, glowering at Steve, “It’s midnight. I’m on patrol. You’ve got one of the most recognizable cars in this entire damn town parked in a restricted-access zone with this idiot–” Hopper gestures at Eddie (Eddie didn’t think the pointing or the idiot were necessary, but clearly, clearly, he’s missing something here), “–who’s been dragged into my station more times than I could count.”

“The town line, Hop, is over there,” Steve says, pointing at an indiscriminate spot over Hop’s shoulder that may or may not be part of the Hawkins town line, “We’re not even in Hawkins anymore. You’re totally out of your jurisdiction.”

“You wanna know something about jurisdiction, smart-ass?” Hopper asks, “If my report says shit happened in my jurisdiction, it happened in my jurisdiction.”

“Wow,” Steve deadpans, “Way to not sound totally corrupt. Nice work, Chief.”

Hopper’s jaw twitches for a second, and he’s clearly debating if he wants to keep arguing with Steve who, to Steve’s credit, looks like he’s got debate in him for days. Ultimately though, Hopper decides against it and stalks back over to his squad car.

“If you’re not home by one there’s gonna be hell to pay. You hear me, Harrington?” Hopper yells, “One AM. Hell to pay.”

“Oh, sure,” Steve rolls his eyes, “Totally hear you. One AM. Loud and clear or whatever.”

Steve flips the cruiser both birds as it peels away, which Hopper only flashes his high beams at a couple times before he’s gone, kicking up a bunch of dirt and mulch and leaves in his wake, and Steve is wearing an exasperated expression as he turns to face Eddie again.

“God, he’s so annoying. Let’s just go to my house.”

Eddie gapes at him.

“What the fuck was that?”

“Huh?”

“What the fuck was that?” Eddie repeated, gesturing wildly towards where Hopper’s car had just been.

“Wha– you mean with Hop?”

“Uh, yeah?!?”

Steve just brushed him off, “Whatever, just ignore him. He’s basically my dad.”

“What?”

EDIT: read the expanded fic on AO3 :)

[quimichi]

⌗﹒THEIR VOICE LINES ABOUT YOU ౨ৎ˚₊‧ GN!

Aether

❝Since the beginning of Mondstadt they've been with me. They actually turned out to be my second guide! Which makes Paimon even more of an emergency food❞

❝Whaa-Paimon will pretend Paimon didn't hear that!❞

❝No really, I'm glad I found them...or rather they found me. It really wasn't much of a surprise when I-oh-I'm already talking too much again.❞

❝Traveler can go shy when he talks about his lover, hehe. STOP PULLING ME AWAY-H-HEY-!❞

Albedo

❝Oh? I see, you already heard about Y/n. Well, its not a big of a surprise, they're well known here in Mondstadt. Don't worry, if you ever encounter them, dont be shy to talk to them. They have actually been a great help for my researches and experiments. ❞

Al-Haitham

❝ Y/N? Yes, what about them? Yes, we're in a relationship, and? No, I'm not mad, why? I'm asking to much questions? Could ask you that, you seem awfully interested in my partner. Passive aggressive? Pff, now you're just pretending things. ❞

Ayato

❝ You'd like to know more about Y/n? What makes you think I have answers? Oh? I see, Ayaka has told you about it, well...Me and Y/n have been in a relationship for quite a while now. They're a very good support, doesn't matter what path i take or decisions I make, they always have my back. Without them I wouldn't be half the man I am right now. Satisfied with this answer? ❞

Baizhu

❝ The person that always helps out here is not some assistant. Don't worry, I'm sure they're not insulted. Who else are they then? Oh, my lover. Whats with that surprised look on your face? Didn't think I'd be taken? To be frank...I'm quite surprised too that I got this lucky.❞

Bennett

❝ Y/n? My lucky charm? They're awesome! A loyal member in Benny's adventure team...the only one though...They go on every adventure with me! Saved my life multiple times! Bring me good furtune! And are my partner! Wow, I really lucked out for real this time.❞

Capitano

❝ I'd like to keep my private life as private as possible...but for you I make an exception, just this once. Yes, Y/n is my life partner, my lover if you'd like to put it that way. I hold them very dear and would protect them with my life if i have to. So, if I ever sense any bad intentions coming from you, I will crush you with everything I've got.❞

Childe

❝ They spend last winter with me and my family. So, to show them around and make them feel more comfortable in Snezhnaya we had a little snowball fight. Y/n got hit a dozen times in the face by Teucer. They lost, obviously. But the best part was, when we went home, the slipped right before the door and fell ass first to the ground...but instead of being upset or annoyed...they laughed. I knew they we're the one right then and there.❞

Chongyun

❝ Oh you know Y/n? Well, I do too. You knew? Xingqiu huh?...Can't seem to keep quite sometimes...Yes, I am dating them. Saying this feels foreign...I still can't believe they chose me of all people. But I'm not too insecure about it, after all, they chose me of all people.❞

Cyno

❝ Y/n is one of the few people who actually laugh at my jokes. I don’t know if its out of pity or if i truly make them laugh, but either way i don't care. As long as i see a smile on their face I'm at ease. Huh? What do you mean i sound lovesick?❞

Dainsleif

❝ There are things that I'd rather keep private and save, including my relationship with Y/n. So I have to apo-...no, i trust you but-...You're right. Y/n and I have been in a relationship for quite a long time now. They mean a lot to me, thats why I want to keep any information about them as private as I can.❞

Diluc

❝ Yes, I am in a relationship with Y/n. I guess the topic makes his rounds, huh? We announced our relationship just yesterday, but have been serious for a long time now. I am...not a public as you know. And i didn't wanted any unwanted or negative attention on both of us but i know i can trust you. Right?❞

Dottore

❝ Did i ever had a lover? What an inappropriate question of you~ Of course i had lovers, but none could compare to my favorite. Have you heard of Y/n? Oh yes, they are quite popular aren't they~? Well, they're mine, all mine. So it would be better for you if you keep your hands off them. ❞

Freminet

❝ Are they my friend? Uhm...no...they're a bit more than that. Uhm, yeah they're my partner. We've been together for a while now...Am i happy? Of course i am...I'm just a bit embarrassed thats all. No one has really asked me about our relationship yet except for Lyney, Lynette and father.❞

Gorou

❝ You want to know about Y/n? Sure, what do you wanna know? Yes, they're my partner, in fact, we live together! They're a really caring, they make breakfast every morning, tend any injuries i have and sometimes even run me a bath...that was too intimate.❞

Heizou

❝ Y/n? What do you know about them? Nothing yet but you wanna know more? Why? Interested? Why am I asking all these questions? I'm a detective, and you're interested in my lover-oops-now i ran my mouth.❞

Itto

❝ You mean the oni one for me?! The true love of my life!? THEY'RE AWESOME. I'm so incredibly lucky to have them. AND they're so incredibly lucky to have the awesome one and oni Arataki Itto as their boyfriend!❞

Kazuha

❝ They are currently waiting for my arrival...i cannot wait to have them in my arms again. I miss them every day...What's that book? Oh, it's just for all the poems i write for them while being away. One poem for each day. Once I'm back, i read them to them.❞

Kaeya

❝ Oh you mean my little snowflake? Yes, i know them quite well, i can assure you that one. Wasn't always like that though, took is a while to actually get closer. But i won't complain either way, I'm happy that we finally found each other...damn, look at all the sappy things I'm saying, they've done this to me.❞

Kaveh

❝ I'm still planning our house, i just cannot make it perfect! Ugh, it's really getting on my nerves. I NEED this perfect for them, I need to make this the house of their dreams. But it's taking way to long. Since when am i planning? About 3 years. And since when are we dating? Also about 3 years...oh...❞

Kinich

❝ When they first traveled to Natlan they didn't met me immediately. I've only got to know them through Mualani and Kachina. They once expressed their hatred towards saurian hunters, went off yapping for a good hour too. You should've seen the look on their face once i told them i was one of them. They're still embarrassed to this day, even more after i explained what i really do. One of the many memories that truly make me happy.❞

Lyney

❝ They're aware that true magic doesn't exist. That all my shows are just an act. That somewhere is a trick hidden, so simple its ridiculous. And yet, they're still amazed, still getting big eyed when I'm on stage preforming. Even after countless shows that are the same, they're clapping along like it was the first....I couldn't not have asked for a better support and love in my life then them.❞

Mika

❝ I still don't know how i managed to confess, maybe it's because i can't really remember it anyway. It's a memory I'd like to forget entirely, mostly because i was so embarrassed afterwards. But I never want to forget what they said afterwards. Everytime i hear those 4 words from them I get butterflies.❞

Neuvillette

❝ Y/n and I are in a serious relationship since 5 years and 4 months. We have been living together since 3 years and 1 month. I do consider our relationship deep and intimate. I trust them deeply and never once did I think about it otherwise. I truly believe that our relationship will hold on for eternity. Is this enough information or should I tell you more?❞

Pantalone

❝ Ah, my spoiled little brat? Joking, joking...well, only half. I do spoil them quite a lot, but i wouldn't consider them a brat...most of the time. Just last week I bought them this new coat, winter in Snezhnaya are the hardest in all Teyvat. Oh, and new gloves, a scarf an-no, why would i brag with my money, it's not like i have enough to buy at least million of coats.❞

Pierro

❝ The only thing you need to know is that they are with me and well taken care off. Should you not remember the fact that any hate or violence towards them is strictly forbidden, i will gladly remind you. ❞

Razor

❝ Y/n helped Razor a lot. Razor appreciates it, the help. Razor also loves Y/n. That's what Y/n always tells Razor every day. So Razor tells Y/n every day too.❞

Scaramouche

❝ Who? My lover? Them? No, I would never. No, I'm not keeping anything private?! Neither am I ashamed of anything...quite the opposite, huh? No, said nothing. Screw off now, i need to be somewhere. Where? None of your damn business...So what if its a date?!❞

Thoma

❝ Mhm, you're quite right, Y/n and I arw together. Lucked out, huh? I'm currently teaching them how to cook some dishes, been going well...for the most part. No, they have a hand for it but both of us always seem to lose any focus once we're 30 minutes into it.❞

Tighnari

❝ You should've heard their begging, "Oh Tighnari please, i can keep my own garden!" Yeah, keeping it, but not take care of it. Because who takes care of it? Correct, me. It's easy work, so it's not too troublesome. But what is troublesome is how they don't take care of it. *sigh* maybe i am a bit to harsh on them, they are a bit stressed lately anyway. They deserve to take a rest and calm down from everything. So i gladly take care of the garden, for as long as they need me to.❞

Venti

❝ Our first meeting was quite the embarrassing one, almost feel quite shy telling it....Ok! Ok! I'll tell you!....I fell into their lap...No, i wasn't drunk! Someone else was, pushed me by accident and i stumbled backwards right onto their lap in angels share. And to top it off i took their plate and drink with me. Lucky for me, they weren't mad at all. Still...it's so embarrassing!❞

Wriothesley

❝ Took them quite a while to adjust to Meropide. Understandable though, it's a change from the surface. But once they grew comfortable, it's almost like they don't want to leave. They quickly befriended almost everyone, especially Sigewinne. They grew quite popular here in the matter of just a few weeks. Good for me i got them first before anyone else could.❞

Xiao

❝ Hm? Oh, them? Yes, we're close. Why do you ask? Just curious? Ugh, don't look at me like that. What do you wanna hear? How much i love them? You can wait till the day Teyvat will shatter entirely, I won't say it to you, only to them.❞

Xingqiu

❝ Our love story is picture perfect. A written love story by the finest ink. Full of clichés. We reached for the same book, and our hands touched. Then and there, i was mesmerized...until they snatched the book first.❞

Zhongli

❝ Our love story has been holding on since 3717 years, and it will hold on for many years more. What makes me so sure it will? We love each other like it was the very first day. Never once did we lie to one another, were apart from each other or lost our trust. I do have a contract anyway if anything should happen.❞