#would I reference that movie if it wasn't about Azir learning to be nice?

[talesofmetalandmagic]

Azir the comforter

Azir and Nasus had always had a strong bond.

It didn't start strong, of course. Baby Azir was TERRIFIED of the giant humanoid jackal and alligator towering over him. But since an emperor cannot be afraid there was no parental skirt to hide underneath, and a couple weeks of sweet coaxing and welcoming smiles (as well as Nasus' outright refusal to cane Azir's hands when he flunked his studies, in defiance of imperial orders and praxis) turned fear into curiosity, to fondness, to affection.

As a young prince, the runt of the Emperor's litter, more preoccupied with studies than with battle, Azir was always destined to become closer to the Curator than to Renekton. Nasus always felt bad at having to kick him out when the time to close the libraries for night would come. He brought him dates and tea and bread with honey whenever he spent the afternoons in studies, and held his hand in place of his parents during the funeral of all his siblings.

A prince cannot cry in public... but he can in private, and Nasus' soft hairy chest was the perfect spot to shed his tears. "Don't fret, little bird... it wasn't your fault. You couldn't have done anything. You'll be alright... and whatever your parents may attempt, me and Renekton will always have a place for you"

When Azir was lost into his ascension, Nasus railed at Xerath with a fury previously unknown... so much so even Renekton could hardly recognize his tempered brother.

-What did you do to him? You monster, how could you... he was so good!-

Alright, he's partly biased, but we'll excuse it for loss.

And then Renekton was lost, and so was Azir... and Nasus was alone in a foreign desert, no hand to hold his own after having held so many.

Years pass, then decades, centuries, and then millennia. Azir is lost in oblivion, Renekton is locked in agony, and Nasus has lost taste for life. Sometimes he thinks back of Azir, his sweet little bird, choking his sweetness in imperial artificiality, unable to follow his heart through the loss, the duties, the fears, his biases and an ego he cannot control.

When Azir comes back, Nasus is overjoyed: he swears to himself he'll never, ever lose him again, and no pain or harm shall ever befall his cherished little bird.

So guess what happens when Xerath finds him.

~ ~ ~

One night, during Azir's imperial tour, he finds Nasus late at night, in a creek between the dunes behind the camp, practicing his swings with the halberd while everybody else – even Azir himself, who's relearning how to socialize and have fun – is chilling round the fire with a drink.

-I must train, my lord. My blade shan't ever miss a swing.-

-It's past midnight, Nasus. What you must do is rest. Put that halberd down and come back to the camp at once.-

Nasus winces back, holding onto his halberd. -I insist, my lord. Your welfare comes before my leisure.-

-And I, as your Emperor, insist back. It's a pleasant night...-

-I MUST train, my lord!-

How dares he scream at his Emperor? Azir stumbles back, frightened at the sudden growl... and aghast at Nasus' out of character behavior. He's out of breath, tongue dangling, eyes agape – a mad dog, or one in pain.

-My purpose here... is to protect you. Xerath is after you, the kingdom is in shambles, and you're the last thing remaining between us and ruin.- No more Xerath, Gods... no more Xerath! -You were lost, you... you were cold, and Renekton... and then you were gone, for a year, without knowing... without helping, as he... gods, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.-

-Nasus, dear, we don't have to...- Azir doesn't want to think about that. It's done, he suffered and wept and screamed, but things are going better now. Nasus holds Azir's hands so tight it almost hurts, and tears fall down his snout. Whatever he's been holding, it's been there for so long. Has he been drinking? No, not Nasus.

-I'm so sorry, my lord. I know you told me I shouldn't feel to blame, but... It should have been me. I should have taken your place, I'm stronger... and it's my duty to protect you. It should have been me...-

Stop... stop, shut up. Azir raises his hands, unable to speak. The image of Nasus going through all that is enough to make him tremble. He knows he didn't drink, because he knows his Nasus, but that makes his rage and tears real. How long has he suffered after losing us all? Things Azir never thought about, but which cannot leave his mind now that thinking is all he does.

-I failed Renekton, I failed your father, I failed you. Twice over I've failed: it shan't happen a third time. May I not ever know any joy until you...-

-ENOUGH!-

Orders still come natural to Azir, and the sands quake as he taps his staff onto the ground. Nasus' tear-stricken face rises from his arms, and onto Azir's chest, as he sits by his side and holds him close.

-You didn't deserve that. I didn't deserve that. We're here to make sure it doesn't happen again... but we're here to live. If you want me to heal, let me move on. And do so yourself.-

After all, Azir thinks with jaded sadness, if Xerath didn't kidnap me he wouldn't have to send Renekton away from me. If he didn't send him off, my retinue wouldn't have taken him – and he wouldn't be on his way to coming anew. I loved him too. I love both. I'm... tired of going back to that.

Nasus kneels onto the sand, head in one hand, choking soft sobs in his fingers. -My lord, I know... but I don't know how.-

-We'll be alright, my friend.- Azir takes Nasus to his feathery chest and wraps him into his own shawl. -We will be. Now cry it out.-

-My lord, you're the Emperor,- Nasus giggles through his tears. -You shouldn't be the one caring for me.-

You are immovable. But so am I. -I've done... much less imperial things in my life. Besides, an Emperor should have the last word in such things. Now cry it out. Tomorrow we'll talk about this. In front of... dates and tea and bread with honey.-

Nasus sniffles, chokes a laugh. -I missed you so much, little bird.-