#with the only word i'd know there being kiitos to thank people

[troglepsych]

I'm Finnish and I have never heard anyone call their mom's friends anything else than their first name. I can understand why a lot of people would interpret that as rude but hear me out. Warning, long post

1)why not mr/mrs/ms? The Finnish words for mr and mrs are not really in use. Like at all. I think I've only heard the Finnish word for mister, Herra, used seriously only a few times because depending on the situation our president is referred to as Herra Tasavallan Presidentti, meaning Mr. President of the Republic. Another context is the unserious one. They can be used in a very insulting light, kinda like calling someone a princess, someone who thinks theyre above you in a snotty way. So if someone tried to call me Rouva (mrs) or Neiti (ms) I would be so fucking confused why someone was trying to insult me or being so formal with me. Like I'd personally compare it to being called Lord in english, just unnecessary formal. First names are used in a lot of cases but if you wanna be a bit formal/respectful you would use their full name but honestly that would be too formal for family friends. Like it goes so far that even people with doctorates arent called dr __ here. The only context where it gets added is honestly newspaper articles and other contexts like it where your occupation/education would be mentioned.

2)Why not auntie/uncle? Id never even call my uncles or aunts that haha like I'd compare it to those book passages where siblings talk to each other like "hey sis" or "what's up lil bro" It's just way too awkward. My aunts and uncles are just their first names to me and my nephew just calls me by my first name. The only family members (or honestly any people in my life) that I would call by their "title" are my mom and dad, and some even stop doing that in adulthood. I actually sometimes talk about my parents by their first names depending on who I am speaking with, but idk i still call them mom and dad while talking to them. But back to auntie and uncle: ig it holds a lot of assumption that we are close when we're basically only acquainted so it would be considered kinda rude. (Though I must add: the only occasion where Im willing to be called aunt is at my part time job. Im a cashier and kids often call us kassatäti meaning cashier aunt (or kassasetä, cashier uncle) it's super cute and it always makes my heart melt. Like it's so adorable when a kid wants to buy some candy with their pocket money and beam at you "kiitos kassatäti!" when they run off. Im honestly blanking out on what other professions __ aunt/uncle is used with here but i can say that it's not many. Like for example doctors are just doctors, not doctor aunts etc. Even then __ aunt/uncle is reserved for pretty small kids. Like i dont see kids call me that after they start school so like up to the age of 7. I know this is irrelevant to the question but i just wanted to share this cute thing.)

It's not even about respect or anything. I guess we Finns find titles and stuff unnecessary when the respect we hold to people comes across perfectly fine in the actual things we say. We make sure to thank them, ask them how they are etc and that is enough. Even then my mom's friends arent really that different from other adults in my life so I dont really see the point in them getting a specific title when I barely interact with them.

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