#why can‘t I forget you

[dollyonm0lly]

THINKING ABOUTTT

caracalla lusting after getas wife, crying because he can‘t have her and finally going to geta to propose having her marry him aswell

at first geta is against it because you‘re HIS property and sharing with his whiny stupid brother makes him angry but eventually he caves in

„but we can take turns“ caracalla whines and cries until geta gives in, the thought kind of entices him 👀

and you‘re absolutely not pleased, caracalla freaks you out but now you have to obey him aswell

TW: kinda of noncon, crazy Caracalla.

“This is a bad idea" is what you don't say, but it shows in your gaze as your eyes meet Geta's, he being a little further away from the bed where you are sitting, making it a little difficult to see him clearly in the partially dark room, only lit by the ambiance outside of the windows. Your eyes now wander towards the brother closest to you, Caracalla, who is standing in front of you, you try to ignore him, fix your head in the same position and keep it that way, your attention only on his detailed robe so close to you.

“She defies me” - Caracalla says to the wind, there is no immediate response, and you can't detect what the mood of his voice could be, neutral, perhaps? There are moments with Caracalla when you can feel all his emotions, he screams, cries, reacts violently and impulsively, and there are times when it seems like there is nothing... Nothing, you haven't felt anything of what might be coming now, what emotion he will show you next, and that scares you. He scares you. And when you feel a strange hand coming towards your face, unfamiliar, you don't think twice about dodging it, your head slightly hesitating back, running away.

You can feel your face sweating from the tension in the room, and you know you've screwed yourself after running from your Emperor's grasp. You hold still, your hands clenching the fabric of your dress, your knuckles white with the intensity of your grip. - "Stay still for him, dear” - You can hear Geta say in the distance, your heart immediately tightens in your chest in a feeling of betrayal, however, you don't seem to be the only one reacting badly to his words.

“Stop bossing her around, you're too bossy and I'm tired of it, and... And I talked to you about it! You said you'd share control over her, so stop trying to talk for me” - You hear Caracalla complain to his brother, his voice still a bit too steady for the stiff way he said them, you can see in your peripheral vision how he clench his own hands into fists as he speaks, and it doesn't help your nervousness one bit. Geta doesn't offer him an answer.

“Take off your clothes” - The older brother says as he turns his attention back to you, he seems to want to take on a commanding tone, but when you listen a little better to the edges of it, you can hear a slight whimper of a sulking child in the background of his words, as if he is begging you to obey him, and that, that is never a good sign with Caracalla.

You hesitate again, not moving a muscle. You feel numb, lost.

“WHY ARE YOU NOT OBEYING ME? WHY ARE YOU PRETENDING NOT TO LISTEN TO ME? I TOLD YOU TO TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES. WHY ARE YOU STILL IN PLACE? ARE YOU STUPID? STUPID, STUPID, STUPID” - There it is, what you hate the most, the screaming and the crying, the way he freaks out, and you are the target of it now, you feel a burning disgust in your body for your husband, you look for him in the room, and when your eyes meet, Caracalla notices, and misunderstands the situation - “Why... Why are you looking at him?? ARE YOU SEEKING AUTHORIZATION FROM HIM? I AM EMPEROR TOO! DO YOU FORGET? DOES EVERYONE FORGET? IS GETA EMPEROR ALONE? HE IS THE ONE EVERYONE LISTENS TO, EVERYONE PLEASES, EVERYONE RESPECTS…” - The older brother screams and screams in your face, and eventually, you can start to hear the strangled sobs in his voice, he's crying now and curling up in himself, you try not to roll your eyes at the crybaby in front of you, and you even think about talking back to him, when you're interrupted.

“Fuck it, just stand still then, stupid” - You hear him say in a harsh tone, and soon after, you feel his rough hand grab your entire face, throwing you back on the bed until your head hits the mattress. He climbs on top of you, and with so much access and advantage over your body, he begins to forcefully undress you, tearing the delicate nightgown of your body, throwing what are now rags to the bedroom floor, you scream and try to hide yourself with your hands, but it does little good when you see the excitement in the Emperor's eyes above you - “You are so beautiful, so beautiful, so beautiful, I'm so happy, brother! She is perfect” - He repeats, like a kid in a candy store, he examines you all over, forcing the hands that previously protected you from his intrusive gaze against the bed, holding you down, you squirm and try to kick him, but his weight on top of you makes your struggle more difficult.

“Make her feel good, brother, soon she will be less wary of you" - Geta says as he leaves the shadows from which he watched the whole scene, approaching the bed to sit on it, you hate the way his words treat you like an animal, how his eyes seem hungrier watching his brother attack you than when it's just the two of you alone, how his hand still dares to try to caress your face affectionately, resting it on top of your head like he always does. You feel like you could vomit right now. He senses it - “Her breasts are sensitive, why don't you try?" - He suggests, licking his lips in anticipation, watching his brother nod.

Caracalla still seems a little dizzy admiring your body, his own trembles with satisfaction just from seeing you, from feeling you so close, your eyes, your mouth, your skin, your smell, everything about you calls out to him, he can feel his body warmer than normal and his eyes fall as if he had never slept in his life, it feels like a dream. He pants through his mouth, seeming to prepare himself, slowly lowering, as if not to scare you, as if he doesn't scare you just by existing, his eyes never stray from yours, nor yours from his, what you think is rebellion on your part, he takes as affection.

At his first contact with your breasts, you feel a weak moan leave your lips, not yet prepared, seeming to forget that you should contain yourself, that you hate him, he leaves kisses down the center of your chest, slowly leading them to your left breast, kisses all over, and then to the right, kisses all over, he seems strangely affectionate compared to the outburst from seconds ago, he takes his tongue out, showing it off quite a bit to your suspicious eyes, and takes it to one of your nips, circling it, testing the waters, and reciprocating positively when you moan even with your lips closed. He closes his eyes as if enjoying a feast, let his tongue travel over you, and licks soon turn into sucking, it doesn't seem enough for him, he needs more, much more, he needs to have your entire breast in his mouth and suck it as if his life depends on it, release it with an audible 'pop' and then, go to the other one. And that he does.

Minutes seem like hours, you moan and moan, and not only you, you hear Caracalla moan as much, seeming to feel more pleasure in sucking your breasts than you in having them sucked, he pants and growls against them, bites them, and makes it seem as if he is not even stopping to breathe, too busy admiring your body as if to him you were God, he can't hold himself back, he has wanted this for so long, you were everything to him, still are, he can't believe he deprived himself of touching you for so long. You can feel him humping pathetically against one of your legs, his erection still under his red robe, he doesn't even care, he cries with pleasure as if he is already inside you, as if just rubbing himself like a dog against your thigh was a blessing, you can hear the cries and sobs again, the little whimpers, but now he seems to be in heaven on Earth.

“Make my brother happy, moan his name, dear” - You hear Geta whisper in your ear just for you alone to hear, something malicious and perverse in his voice, he seems to be entertaining himself watching, you can't see him well where you're lying, you wish you could, you wish you could see if he's touching himself by the image of his brother defiling you, you wish he'd bend down and capture your lips with his, you wish you could suck him off and bring him the satisfaction his brother is feeling at the moment. But the only thing you get are caresses in your hair, on your forehead, like a puppy that has done well.

“Ca- Caracalla…” - You say in a weak moan, uncertain of your own words, even as he begins to make you wet between your legs. You don't feel like yourself when the words leave your mouth, and maybe you've been out of your own body for a long time, you just hadn't realized it. You feel him writhe and moan in gratitude as he hears his name come out of your mouth, something wet smearing your leg. It doesn't take you long to realize that the sticky stuff is coming from Caracalla's robe, he's cumming inside his own clothes, just by humping himself against you. Next, you feel your chest wet, more tears probably, since you can hear him sniffling below you.

You unconsciously rest a hand on Caracalla's head, closing your own eyes.

[morganakang444]

𝑑𝘰𝑛‘𝘵 ℎ𝑎𝘵𝑒 𝘵ℎ𝑒 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑒𝑟 || 𝑙𝑒𝑒 ℎ𝑒𝑒𝑠𝑒𝑢𝑛𝑔 (𝑝𝘵 2) ౨ৎ

꒰ ꒱ྀི lee heeseung x fem!reader

☆゙ ↳ main masterlist

☆゙ ↳ prev | next

☆゙ ↳ synopsis: you don‘t want me? fine. the two of us can play that game.

the heartthrob of the campus had finally set his eyes on y/n. she was going to be his next victim, to fall for him and assume she can fix him moments before she finds herself ghosted. but y/n knew all too well…too bad she only captures heeseung‘s heart after beating him at his own game. that’s when she learns: don’t hate the player. hate the game.

☆゙ ↳ wc: 3828

☆゙ ↳ genre/warnings: a lil smutty again (y/n touches herself lol), cursing, maybe a bit rushed (?), y/n is still a virgin and heeseung is turning into a simp lwk, drinking, partying, mentions of sex, if i missed anything lmk!!

☆゙ ↳ an: i‘m super nervous to post this because i‘m rlly hoping it lives up to part one!! (i am scared that is my peak if u can‘t tell.) i‘ve had most of this written already so this is why it came so fast. part three will be taking a little while lol also i had to mention the nostalgic jackson wang party!!

in the car, karina basically dragged y/n into the passenger seat, a concerned look on her face. "are you okay?? hee didn’t give me any time to ask what happ—"

y/n waved her hand, signaling karina to stop talking. "i‘m fine. i was just getting harassed by some guy and heeseung helped me out." she placed her hand down, a smirk forming on y/n‘s face. "but your plan worked quicker than i thought it would—heeseung admitted to wanting me. and it was a real, raw, just—genuine thing that came from his mouth." y/n chuckled. "pretty soon i‘ll have to leave him hanging." she smiled, satisfied.

karina‘s mouth was agape in disbelief, blinking at y/n‘s words. "this fast? i knew playing hard to get was the best shot," karina snickered, nudging y/n‘s shoulder before starting up her car.

and as they started driving y/n remembered who karina was with before coming here; yunjin.

"how‘s it going with yunjin?" y/n noticed karina‘s grip on the steering wheel tighten.

"i don’t even know if there is anything going on with yunnie. we‘re together and we fuck and talk or go to sleep a little together before one of us has to leave." she frowns.

"so…a situationship with your ex, hm?" y/n asks sympathetically.

karina only nods. "but i‘ll be over it soon. i‘ll meet another cute girl or maybe a nice, manly guy and i‘ll probably forget all about her."

but y/n knew karina too well—she could never forget about her girlfriend since junior year of high school. she placed her manicured hand on karina’s round shoulder.

"you love her, huh?"

karina gave y/n a saddened smile. "i think you know that answer…"

"let’s go shopping and get your mind off this, hm? we can go home after and order takeout and watch a movie, yeah?"

karina nods, grinning appreciatively at y/n.

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

sitting in their small dorm room, y/n‘s ipad was setup against a pillow on karina‘s bed. with blankets and pillows under them, on them, and all around them, karina and y/n sat against y/n‘s bed, a low, long, tv tray over their laps, snacks and food all over it, the girls picking up and eating whatever like it was a buffet—sushi, cheeseburger sliders, jellies, puddings, fried rice, mac n cheese, sodas, and pizza rolls on plates in front of them as their eyes were glued to '10 things i hate about you' playing on the tiny screen in front of them.

y/n was slurping down a jello cup when karina‘s phone pinged. she licked burger grease off her fingers before she wiped it on her old, oversized pajama shirt and picked up her phone.

"it‘s sunoo…he wants to know if you and i wanna come to jackson wang‘s party tomorrow night." karina says as she reads sunoo‘s message.

y/n thinks. "isn’t jackson the president of the frat he‘s in? is it going to be in the frat house?" she blinks.

karina nods. "yeah, it will be. i know you don’t like parties so we d—"

"let’s go." y/n smiles. "i never go out. and i don’t want you to stay home because of me."

karina raises a surprised brow. "you sure?"

y/n nods, sounding assured of her decision. "yeah. i wanna."

"okay, i‘ll tell sunoo.." karina smirks, happy her best friend was finally expanding her horizons.

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

all through that next day, y/n rushed through her classes, not paying much attention to anything at all—except for the wonders filling her mind about her first real party.

it was ridiculous—y/n felt like a high schooler all over again.

however, that whole day y/n hadn’t bumped into heeseung once. she felt a strange sense of disappointment swell up inside of her…but she didn’t know why. and as she shook that feeling off as her last class of the day ended, she darted home to get ready with karina tonight.

"pink…pink…or…pink! 'kay…" karina sighed, helping y/n choose an outfit for later tonight.

"what‘s wrong with pink, hm?" y/n teased, sitting on the edge of her bed.

"pink isn’t sexy…" karina pulls out a silk, baby pink mini dress with a thin, white trim around the end and around the v-neck cleavage. she narrowed her eyes, analyzing the article of clothing deeply.

"this can make due…" she speaks, fingers running the material of the slit on the dress intently.

"with what?" y/n tilts her head.

"those little white heels you have—the kitten heels that are open toed. anddd…" karina trails off, grabbing y/n‘s little jewelry holder hanging in her closet. "these little pearl earrings, and your thin little pearl necklace." karina holds up a matching set of tiny dangly pearl earrings and a necklace. she lays it out on y/n‘s bed, shoes going underneath on the floor.

"and we‘ll curl the ends of your hair…and keep the makeup light, but add some glitter, hm?" karina came close to y/n, touching all over her hair, fingers running through and eyes scanning over the girl‘s soft locks.

"yes ma‘am." y/n salutes with a playful smirk before standing up. karina gives y/n‘s ass a little smack, earning a small squeal from the girl who was soon laughing.

"now go shower, you stink." karina teased.

y/n playfully scoffed before grabbing her stuff and going to the dorm showers.

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

and even in the shower, y/n could only think of all the fun she was about to have as she stood under the warm water, feeling the warmness cascade down her body.

all the possibilities ran through her head—who would she dance with? would she get black out drunk and make out with someone? what if she slept with someone and lost her v card at a frat party?

y/n sighed, her mind trailing off to what it‘d feel like to finally have sex for the first time. how it‘d feel to have a man hold her close and slide in and out of her tight heat as he moaned her name with each thrust. how a man would leave a trail of hickeys down her neck and breasts as he fingered her, curling his digits inside of her warm, wet pussy, hitting the sweet spot inside of her that made her see stars.

y/n sighed in frustration, leaning her head back against the cold shower tile wall, one of the rare moments of arousal taking over her system, flowing through her veins so sweetly, making her pussy start to drip.

swallowing in defeat, y/n‘s hand traveled down, inching closer and closer to her core, the soft pads of her fingers finding her aching clit, rubbing it in tight little circles, her mouth forming an 'o' shape as her back arched off the tile wall in pleasure. y/n‘s eyes fluttered shut as small sighs left her lips, her fingers moving in a faster rhythm, her mind swarmed with thoughts of being fucked…the feeling of a hand wrapped around her throat as she was pounded into—y/n was never thinking of a specific person, to be honest. in her imagination, the man fucking her didn’t exactly have a face, (but did have a banging bod.) until her hands were moving faster and rougher over her clit, rubbing the swollen nub as she got closer and closer to her peak, her breathy moans echoing off the shower walls…and in her mind there was finally a face. one so unexpected she suddenly pulled back her hand, ripping her orgasm away from herself as her eyes flew open in shock.

why the fuck did lee heeseung‘s face appear in her mind??

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

after her shower, y/n could only stare into her own eyes through the bathroom mirror, a mix of disgust and confusion welling up inside of her.

she combed her wet hair before putting it up in a clawclip, slipping her white towel off her freshly washed and shaved body. she sighed, shuffling her playlist as she applied her skincare to her baby soft face.

all she could think about as she rubbed in her expensive serums and moisturisers was why? why did she have to think about heeseung of all people?

she wasn’t even attracted to him like that—but all y/n could do was brush it off as the fact that it was a mere flashback to the night two weeks ago that left heeseung hanging. she wouldn‘t cave in now. but heeseung was right about one thing.

y/n‘s hands were not doing the job right.

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

"y/n! are you ready?" karina called from right outside their shared dorm room, coming back from the bathroom down the hall.

"yeah…" y/n reluctantly spoke, not too sure if she liked her appearance or not. she was standing in front of her full length mirror propped against her bed, looking at her body from all angles.

karina slowly walked inside, a dramatic gasp leaving her lips as she covered her mouth, staring at y/n.

"you look so hot, y/nnie!!" she squealed, coming up behind her best friend, hugging her from behind and resting her chin on the crook of y/n‘s smooth shoulder.

"you‘re so beautiful." karina smiles affectionately, her tiny purple dress touching y/n‘s. and y/n did look beautiful. her curves were perfectly accentuated by her little pink dress, her soft shoulders on full display thanks to the thin spaghetti straps. her white kitten heels showed off her freshly painted pink toenails, her moisturised skin glowing naturally.

y/n smiled softly, locking eyes with karina. "you really think so?"

karina nods. "the most."

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

it was a short drive to the s.a.e frat house which was already crowded by 11pm. y/n nervously stepped out of karina‘s car, a shaky sigh exiting her glossed lips. taking note of y/n‘s nervousness, karina reached her hand out and took y/n‘s, giving her a reassuring squeeze and a matching smile.

"don’t be scared. this‘ll be fun!" karina pulled y/n inside the huge house, the blaring music growing louder once they stepped closer and closer inside.

upon entry in the dimly lit house, it seemed like everyone from uni was there. the only lighting was shitty leds that could barely illuminate anything, and there were people making out or grinding on each other to the music in every corner of at least four rooms. y/n adverted her gaze, not wanting to feel like she was watching a live action porno about to unfold.

following karina through the crowd, y/n kept her head low, not exactly wanting to draw any attention to herself. this wasn’t really the first party moment she was imagining.

"wanna take a shot?" karina asks, now in the kitchen where the liquor was stored. y/n shakes her head. "one of us has to drive." she laughs dryly, earning a shrug from her best friend. "and that will be you," karina says in a lively manner before downing a shot. she slammed the tiny glass down on the white counter, her face contorting into disgust and eyes squeezing shut.

"fuck, that’s strong…" karina exhales, her matte lips forming an 'o' shape. y/n could smell the alcohol on karina‘s breath, making y/n slightly nauseas.

karina opened her eyes, and looked around. just then, her dark brown eyes landed on a familiar figure with shoulder length red hair and a tiny black dress. karina could tell right away it was the love of her life, huh yunjin.

"there she is, y/n…" karina holds y/n‘s arm, making her look towards yunjin‘s direction, her slender, black polished finger pointed directly to the redhead.

"call her over," spoke y/n encouragingly, trying to calm down the dark haired girl.

"what if she doesn’t want to? what if she doesn’t want to see me in public? what if s—"

y/n rolled her eyes, cutting off karina‘s nervous string of rambles, hollering yunjin‘s name, making her look at the pair. karina shyly hid behind y/n as if the girl were her shield. and as y/n motioned for yunjin to come over, karina lightly smacked y/n‘s bare arm. "what are you doing?" karina whisper yelled, unaware her ex girlfriend was making her way over to them right now.

without a word, y/n dragged karina out from behind her frame. karina stumbled, practically getting shoved into yunjin.

"umm…hi…" karina shyly spoke, adverting eye contact in contrast to her confident ex who stood in front of her.

"oh don’t act like you don’t know me…" yunjin teased, sipping out of her red solo cup as she tucked a strand of karina‘s long, curled hair behind her earring plated ear.

"wanna hang with us? we‘ve both missed you. i know she‘s seen a lot of you lately," y/n started, touching karina‘s shoulder, "but i haven’t." she playfully pouted.

yunjin smirks, softly chuckling.

"yeah, i don’t have anyone else to see." she came closer to karina, a look of enjoyment on her face at making the younger girl nervous.

y/n smiled at karina, knowing her little scheme has worked.

karina grabbed another shot, downing it quickly to subdue her nerves.

"um…wanna dance?" karina asks, her gaze falling on and off of yunjin.

"sure. i‘m always down to dance with you, rina." yunjin grabbed karina‘s hand. "you coming y/n?"

y/n shook her head. "i‘m okay, i‘ll join later—you two should get your time alone."

and with that, yunjin took karina to some other room, leaving y/n alone in the kitchen.

y/n made her rounds, talked to some people from her classes and danced a little with some guy…but she grew bored and craved time with her best friend.

"karina!" y/n called out, walking around the party. moving past people, mumbling 'sorry' and 'excuse me' a few times, her pale eyes darted around, in search for karina or at least yunjin.

but to no avail, y/n grew worried once she reached upstairs and walked in every bedroom, six out of nine containing people having sex—and karina nor yunjin were in none of them.

with an exasperated sigh, y/n pulled out her phone, looking for someone—anyone to call. and her eyes fell on one contact. heeseung.

y/n could call anyone else—annie from history class was here, her friend robin, even joshua would have come to help her. but for some reason, she really wanted to call heeseung…

pressing the contact name, she hit the call option, sighing shakily as she put her phone up to her ear, leaning up against an upstairs wall.

"hello?" y/n heard heeseung‘s voice through the line after a few rings, and faint music in the back. the same music as the party—was he here? probably. everyone else was.

"heeseung? it’s y/n…i need you…" she said with a defeated tone, laced with desperation.

"ahh, finally come to your senses, huh? but i wanna take you out first. i don’t want you to be just a hook u—"

"no, heeseung! not like that!" y/n placed her hand on her head, growing irritated. "i lost karina and yunjin. i‘m upstairs…can you help me out?"

heeseung chuckled. "on my way."

y/n hung up, placing her hands on her face as she crouched against a wall, waiting for her knight and shining armor.

within a few minutes, a hand tapped y/n‘s shoulder, and she looked up to see the person she needed most right now. she flashed a smile of relief, taking heeseung‘s extended hand and pulled herself up.

"thank you, heeseung…" she mumbled, fixing her dress.

heeseung‘s eyes trailed y/n‘s figure up and down…but not with the usual lust in his heart and eyes like he felt with other girls. there was warmth spreading through him like a flower slowly blossoming. something more of affection coursed through his veins. he could only think of her as beautiful—alluring, even instead of sexy. in this moment he would rather have held her in his arms and stroked her hair as she fell asleep instead of fucking her. and that was unusual for him.

"yeah, yeah…come on. i‘ll take you home. you sober?"

y/n nodded. "i was supposed to take the girls home."

heeseung led the girl downstairs and past the crowd, out to his car.

"i‘m glad you chose to call me…" he smiles, opening the passenger door for y/n.

y/n looked down bashfully as she got in, waiting for heeseung to get in the driver‘s seat before replying.

"i guess i figured i could count on you." she replied, putting on her seatbelt.

heeseung looked at y/n affectionately. "that means a lot to hear, you know."

and in that moment of vulnerability, both of them could have seen the truth hidden behind their eyes. the deep meaning sodden with verity. even if neither of them wanted to admit it.

but y/n only looked away. she nodded slowly, biting the inside of her lip to hold back a small smile that was about to form on her lips.

heeseung could only smirk a bit at her shy reaction, not used to her being such a timid little thing.

and with that he drove, both of his hands on the wheel. glancing towards y/n, he saw her delicate hand resting on the console between them, her attention looking out the window towards the night lit sky, and the city around them illuminated by a cascade of lights.

but heeseung was bold. when he looked at y/n, he no longer saw some girl he was chasing. he no longer saw a target to be shot at and claimed. but he didn‘t know why. he didn‘t know what this feeling he held for her exactly was…love? a twisted type of lust?

he carefully brushed his big hand against her own, giving her a chance to pull away if she didn’t want this. when she didn’t, heeseung intertwined his fingers with hers, caressing her knuckle with his thumb.

heeseung didn‘t know why he wanted to hold y/n‘s hand. he could only tell himself this was the next step to getting y/n in his bed. but as heeseung‘s gaze flickered over to the h/c girl beside him, he couldn’t shake the feeling he wanted more than a quick fuck with her. in this moment, he would rather stay like this with her, her tinier hand enveloped in his warm one, her tired frame gazing out the window towards the stars in front of them.

but heeseung could never admit to real feelings for a woman. especially one who left him so humiliated those couple of weeks ago in his dorm room.

the rest of the car ride was of pure silence—the comfortable one, though. the feeling of heeseung‘s calloused thumb contrasting y/n‘s smooth hand set aside her nerves until they got back to her dorm.

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

"you know…i meant what i said over the phone.." heeseung said as the pair approached y/n‘s dorm room, looking down towards his feet before his gaze met y/n‘s.

y/n leaned against her dormitory door, her eyes squinting slightly in confusion. "what did you say..?"

heeseung smirked slightly, leaning his arm against the metal doorframe, towering over y/n. "when i said i wanted to take you out." his smirk turned into a smile of tenderness, letting her feel just how much he meant it.

"oh really?" y/n teased. "i thought you didn’t do dating.." she licked her lips, holding back a satisfied smile.

"nah..i don’t. but there’s something about you that makes me want to." heeseung tucked a strand of hair behind y/n‘s ear. "and i‘d like to figure out why.."

"okay." y/n shrugged. "then take me out. surprise me." she smiled a bit, leaning forward.

heeseung‘s hand traveled up to cup y/n‘s soft, unblemished cheek as he nodded, running the pad of his thumb over her skin.

"whatever you want, my girl.." his words were soft, and his eyes looked around y/n‘s face, his head coming closer to hers. "can..can i.." his words trailed off, but the intention was hung in the air.

y/n didn’t answer, instead she pressed her fingers to the boy‘s lips as he leaned in, biting her lip slightly, her smirk teasing as ever. as much as she was starting to like heeseung, as much as she would love to brush her lips against his in a fiery blaze if passion, she didn‘t. she needed to stay true to herself and her bet with karina. where was the fun in giving in now?

"nuh uh uh…" y/n taunted, tapping his lips with her manicured finger in rhythm with her coos. "i don’t kiss before a first date, heeseung." y/n licked her glossed lips, looking heeseung up and down in satisfaction, knowing she had him right where she wanted him as he let out a frustrated sigh onto her fingers.

"you‘re not slick if you think taking me on a date will help you get into my pants…" y/n tutted, crossing her arms.

heeseung only snickered, leaning slightly back from y/n.

"fine. i‘ll take you out, and i won’t fuck you. how about that? i‘ll show you just how serious i am okay?" heeseung smiled almost cockily, hiding the desperation behind his voice, wanting her to accept his plea.

y/n bit her lip ever so slightly, looking heeseung up and down provokingly. she shrugged. "sure. i‘ll go out with you." she spoke nonchalantly, a small smile of pride forming on her face as heeseung‘s ego deflated, and he let out a small "yes!" whisper, quickly clearing his throat and regaining his composure. "uh, okay, yeah. cool. can’t wait to see you y/n…" heeseung grinned. "how does this saturday sound?" heeseung swallowed, revealing the anticipation building up inside of him.

"sounds perfect," said y/n confidently, nudging heeseung away from her.

"now if you excuse me, i’m sleepy." y/n yawned, grabbing her keys from her mini purse and starting to unlock her door. "goodnight, heeseung…" she smiled sleepily.

"goodnight, pretty girl.." heeseung whispered. "i‘ll call you tomorrow." he planted a chaste kiss to y/n‘s smooth unblemished cheek before sauntering off down the hall.

as y/n entered her dorm and got herself unready as she shuffled her main playlist. she could only sigh every so often, wondering what heeseung’s true intent behind this date was. she couldn’t figure out why it mattered so much to her if she was being played right back—was it her ego being too big, not wanting to be toyed with the same way she was toying him? or was it because she thought she was seeing through some sort of act with his excitement and affection. but the deeper y/n thought about it, she didn’t sense any deception on heeseung‘s end. everything about him was so…genuine in a sense. but y/n has dealt with boys like this in the past, who thought they could hit and quit her—and when she rejected their advances she was met with a blocked number the next morning. however the difference between those boys in high school and lee heeseung is that he doesn’t give up that easy.

and for y/n, the real game was just about to start.

｡𖦹°‧ taglist:

@tsukikourito

@lannadray

@mheretoreadff

@yohanabanana

@cloud-lyy

@heeheelee

@girlwholovekpop

@invsomnixa1

(if ur tags are not working pls lmk ᝰ.ᐟ)

[enemiestolovershoe]

hii!! Do you think you write a kook!reader(but basically a pogue) x jj , where reader and jj are secretly dating but reader wants to meet the rest of the pogues, jj’s not ready so they have a slight argument about that during midsummers and that scene when jj runs away and calls the pogues to go to the bonfire place (don’t remeber what’s its called), he ‘forgets’ to call the reader aswell, making her end up feeling sad and after that finally they talk about their relationship and reader meets the pogues… sorry if this is random.. i just thought about it

Crossed Tides

JJ Maybank x fem!reader

Summary: JJ and Kook!Reader argue when she wants to meet his friends.

Words: 1,5k

Warnings: not proofread, rushed

A/N: I know this is rushed but I just can‘t bring myself to write properly about JJ. I‘m fucking grieving about a fictional character. So if this sucks I‘m so fucking sorry :(

The Midsummers gala was in full swing. Guests glided across the lawn in a sea of pristine whites and blues, sipping drinks and laughing beneath strings of fairy lights. But you stood on the edge of it all, nervously twisting the hem of your dress between your fingers, watching the crowd for one familiar face: JJ.

He’d been distant tonight, showing up late and barely saying two words to you. You’d been secretly dating for months, always meeting at the docks or hidden stretches of beach, anywhere away from the sharp gaze of both the Kooks and the Pogues. But tonight, that distance felt different, like there was something he wasn’t telling you.

You spotted him at the bar, leaning back with his arms crossed, his gaze scanning the crowd as he downed a drink. Taking a deep breath, you walked over, determined to get some answers.

“JJ,” you said, softly but firmly as you placed a hand on his arm. He flinched slightly, then turned to look at you, his usual mischievous smile nowhere to be found.

“Oh, hey.” His voice was clipped, and he looked over your shoulder, as if already searching for a way out.

“Can we talk?” you asked, your voice quiet but unwavering. “Really talk?”

He sighed, setting his glass down and rubbing the back of his neck. “About what?”

“About us,” you replied. “I want to meet your friends, JJ. I want to be part of that part of your life. We’ve been sneaking around for months now, and I feel like… I don’t know, like I’m just some secret you’re embarrassed about.”

JJ’s face fell, but his jaw tightened defensively. “It’s not about being embarrassed.”

“Then what’s it about?” You kept your gaze steady, even though your heart was pounding. “I’m tired of pretending I’m okay with just these hidden moments. I want to meet the people who matter to you. I want to know them, and I want them to know me.”

JJ’s eyes darkened, his frustration evident as he ran a hand through his hair. “It’s just… complicated, alright?”

“How is it complicated, JJ?” you asked, your voice softening. “I know you. I know that you’re not just some Pogue or some label. I don’t care about any of that Kook-Pogue division. I’m here because I care about you.”

He looked down, his fingers fiddling with his bracelet. “They wouldn’t understand.”

“Why not? Because I’m a Kook?” you pressed, hurt creeping into your tone. “JJ, you know that’s just a label to me. I’m not… I’m not one of them. I’m not my family.”

JJ’s gaze softened as he looked at you, his defenses cracking for just a moment. But then, just as quickly, he pulled back again, a hard edge in his voice. “It’s not about you. It’s about them. They’re my family. They’re the only real family I’ve got, and I don’t want anything messing that up.”

Your chest tightened at his words, a mixture of sadness and frustration bubbling up. “So I’d just… mess things up? That’s what you’re saying?”

He opened his mouth to respond but closed it again, clearly struggling to put his feelings into words. Before he could say anything else, someone brushed past you, nearly spilling a drink on your dress, breaking the tension.

JJ took a step back, running a hand through his hair again. “I… I just need some air, alright?”

Before you could respond, he turned and walked off, disappearing into the crowd.

Hours passed, and the night grew quieter. The gala began to wind down, and you found yourself waiting on the steps, watching each group of guests leave, hoping JJ might come back. You checked your phone repeatedly, but there was no word from him.

You tried not to let it hurt. He was probably with his friends now, probably didn’t even think to call you. But deep down, you knew you couldn’t just keep ignoring this. Something had to change.

Meanwhile, JJ had wandered off, his feet taking him almost automatically to the Boneyard. The familiar glow of the bonfire greeted him, and he felt his shoulders relax a little as he spotted John B., Pope, and Kiara laughing together. Here, with them, he didn’t have to think about labels or boundaries; he was just himself, just JJ.

“Yo, JJ!” John B. called, waving him over. “What are you doing here, man? I thought you were busy with all those rich people tonight.”

JJ forced a grin as he joined them. “Yeah, needed a break from all that. Figured you guys were a little more my style.

Pope raised an eyebrow. “Oh, really? That why you’ve been disappearing on us every other night?”

JJ chuckled, trying to play it off. “You know me, man, always got something going on.”

Kiara gave him a knowing look. “Or someone?”

JJ’s grin faltered for a moment, but he quickly recovered, shrugging it off. “Maybe, maybe not.”

But as the night wore on and the fire began to die down, his mind kept drifting back to you. To the hurt in your eyes when he’d brushed you off, the way you’d tried so hard to be understanding. Guilt twisted in his chest, and he knew he couldn’t keep hiding this forever.

He pulled out his phone, thumb hovering over your name in his contacts, but something held him back. What if they didn’t get it? What if his worlds just couldn’t mix?

He ended up putting his phone away without calling you.

The next morning, you decided you couldn’t wait any longer. You went down to the docks, hoping you’d catch him there. The salty air was cool against your skin as you waited, watching the horizon until you finally saw him approach.

JJ looked surprised to see you, hesitating before stepping closer, his hands shoved into his pockets.

“Hey,” he said, his voice low and uncertain.

“Hey,” you replied, studying his face. You could see the shadows under his eyes, the way he looked like he hadn’t slept much. “We need to talk.”

He nodded, glancing down. “I know.”

You took a deep breath. “JJ, I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep being just this… secret. I want more than stolen moments. I want to be part of your life, all of it.”

He swallowed, looking away. “I get it. And… you’re right. You deserve more than that.”

“Then why won’t you let me in?” you asked, voice soft but steady. “What are you so afraid of?”

JJ hesitated, then looked up, his eyes finally meeting yours. “I’m afraid of losing them. They’re everything to me. I don’t want to do anything to mess that up. And… I don’t want to lose you, either.”

You softened, reaching out to take his hand. “JJ, you won’t lose them. And you won’t lose me. You don’t have to choose.”

He held your gaze, his thumb brushing over your knuckles as he seemed to weigh his options. After a long moment, he sighed, a small, resigned smile tugging at his lips.

“Alright,” he said finally. “Let’s go meet the Pogues.”

Later that day, you and JJ headed down to the Cut, where John B., Pope, and Kiara were lounging on the HMS Pogue. As JJ led you over, you couldn’t help but feel a rush of nerves, but his hand was warm in yours, steadying you.

John B. noticed you first, his eyebrows shooting up as he looked between you and JJ. “Whoa, JJ, you brought a guest?”

JJ cleared his throat, squeezing your hand. “Uh… everyone, this is (Y/N).”

Kiara raised an eyebrow, smirking. “So, this is the girl you’ve been sneaking off with.”

You blushed, but her smile was genuine, and she waved you over. “Come on, there’s plenty of room.”

Pope grinned, offering you a seat beside him, and John B. patted the edge of the boat. “Welcome to the crew,” he said, shooting you a wink.

You couldn’t help but smile, feeling the weight on your heart finally lift as you took your place among the Pogues, hand in hand with JJ. And for the first time, you felt like you truly belonged by his side.

[fallingdownhell]

Could I request Al-Haitham, Kaveh, Kaeya and Zhongli getting hugged from behind by their s/o?

Absolutely! This is so adorable!

Characters Included: Alhaitham; Kaveh; Kaeya; Zhongli

Content: gender neutral reader; really only fluff otherwise

Word count: 1,1k words

Please enjoy this dose of fluff<3

Alhaitham

Honestly surprised and jumps a little the first few times you hug him from behind unexpectedly

It‘s not that he doesn‘t like it, he just wasn‘t prepared for this

Gradually gets used to you doing this if you continue to do it and actually grows to really like it

He loves the feeling of your arms wrapped around his waist while you rest your head on his back. You never see it, but he always wears a smile when you do this with him

He can‘t really explain it, but this form of a hug from you gives him a certain feeling of security

Most of the time, you hug him like this when he stands in the kitchen, preparing food for the both of you. You would come up from behind and wrap your arms around his waist

He doesn‘t really show any type of reaction besides pausing what he‘s doing for the fraction of a second before he resumes like nothing has happened, but you know that he enjoys this

You might not see his soft smile, but the way he would rest one of his hands over yours from time to time told you everything you needed to know. It gave you the knowledge that he liked the gesture, so you kept doing it

At this point, it became a routine for the both of you. You would come up to him like this almost daily. It was just normal

So much so, that one time where you didn‘t hug him from behind, simply because you were tired and forgot about it, he thought that something was wrong between the both of you. He sat you down to talk to you and when you found out the reason why he thought that way, it honestly made your heart melt a little

Since that day, you make it a point to remember each and every single day, and he absolutely eats it up

Never stop doing it, he might just murder someone if you don‘t give him his daily dose of backhugs

Kaveh

Absolutely adores it!

He would be all for physical touch as it is, he hugs and touches you every chance he gets and as long as you‘re also okay with that

But if you were to actually return his physical affection? Archons, he‘d worship you on the spot!

first time you come up from behind and hug him, he's surprised and a bit taken aback, but instantly smiles and places his own hands over yours

totally enjoys it!

would often take this opportunity to induldge in silly stuff with you. Wether that be to start dancing around the room like that, or anything else really

would absolutely love it if you made this a regular habit of yours

actually kinda demands it from you, now that he's had a taste of it

WILL pout endlessly if there ever goes a day by where you don't come up and hug him from behind

his absolute favourites are when he's sitting down working on some sketches and you wrap your arms around his neck from behind

something about it just feels so loving and domestic to him, he can't help but lean back into your touch, totally forgetting about his work

yeah, please never stop doing it, he can't live without those hugs anymore

Kaeya

another one who has to get used to this form of affection first

Kaeya is not at all used to relationships, or even showing affection for someone at all

and if your love language just so happens to be physical touch, he has to get used to that even more

I do believe that Kaeya is actually pretty touch starved, so once he gets used to it, he starts to yearn for it

those back hugs quickly become his favourite form of hugs. Sure, he likes to hold you in his arms and pull you close to his chest

but feeling your arms around him, being the one held by you, feeling protected from everything else, has a completely different effect on him

after getting used to it, the first time he really, freely enjoyed and induldged in that feeling, he almost started crying from how overwhelming it suddenly was

you paniced a bit at seeing this, pulling back, asking if you did something wrong to make him cry

but when he simply asked you to keep doing that, you instinctively knew what was going on with him. So, without a word, only a smile on your lips, you put your arms back around him and rested the side of your head against his back, letting him feel you

really comes to enjoy them, but he won't pressure you into them when you're not feeling it for a day or so

but if he has to go longer without it, he starts to grow restless, but denying it if someone were to ask him about it

don't keep those hugs from him for too long, let him induldge from time to time, and he will be the most happy you've ever seen him

Zhongli

absolutely hooked to them from the first time it's happened

he enjoys the physical comfort and closeness as is, in any way he can get it, but hugs are always at the top of the list for him

likes giving them as much as he loves recieving them from the person he adores

not so much a physical person with friends or other people, that privilege is reserved for his partner, only

the first time you wrap your hands around his waist from behind, he holds what he's doing for a second, before he smiles to himself, resuming his actions while one hand rests over your hand, intertwining your fingers together

loves it when you both stay like that for a while, just enjoying each others presence and warmth

after a while of this, he will put down what he was doing, then turning around in your arms and engulfing you into a real hug, pulling you close into him so that he can hold you to him

at moments like this, he wishes he could just hide away from the world with you, so that he would never have to let go of you ever again, but he knows that's not possible

still, the tought is there every time this happens

and it happens a lot!

you come to hug him like that almost daily, mostly when you come home from work and he's already there, waiting for you

he always looks forward to those moments, anticipating to have you all to himself again for a few hours without anything coming in your way...

[skipper1331]

Lost and found // Patri Guijarro

a/n: based off this request. Please enjoy :D

"Shit!" looking though your bag, you frantically searched for your keys. "Shit, shit, shit" You've looked in every opening of your bag but just couldn't find it. Everything important was on your bunch of keys, car keys, keys to your apartment, for the garage, keys for your childhood home, everything. "¿Qué pasa?" your favorite spaniard asked as she walked to you after seeing your stressed out face. She placed her hand on your back, an innocent act to calm you down. "My keys! I don‘t where they are!" Defeated you sat down, arms crossed. Where had you put them? "Why are you so stressed? Here, there they are" Patri wiggled with them in front of your face, grinning.

"Ah! What? How?"

"Maybe you should check your jacket the next time" the midfielder whispered in your ear, answering your question. She pressed her lips against your temple for a quick peck before she walked back to her cubby, Mapi and Alexia sharing a look.

-

"Fucking hell" you grumbled, looking for your phone. You could‘ve sworn you had it a second ago. You searched in the kitchen, your bedroom, the bathroom, everywhere. The only phone you found was Patris which was in the kitchen. As you entered the living room the spaniard sat on the couch, some movie playing in the backround. Your hands rummaged around on the couch, desperately looking for your phone. "What‘re you looking for?"

"My phone" you whined, turning around every cushion while the midfielder started to laugh. "Here," she gave you your phone which she had in her hands the whole time. How did you not notice? "I asked you if I could play my game on your phone and then you gave it to me"

Embarassed, you slapped your hands on your face, hidding behind them. How could you forget that? Patri was obsessed with that one game you had on your phone, she always asked if she could play and you never say no. "Don‘t hide that beautiful face of yours" her hands placed themselves on your hips, pulling you down so you sat on her lap.

The two of you weren‘t together but also not just friends, there had been a few sneaky, stolen kisses yet nothing more. "You can‘t keep losing your stuff, one day you‘ll get lost yourself" she whispered, her thumb drawing circles on your hip.

"I‘m trying" you mumbled as your head fell on her shoulder.

-

"But I had it the whole time" Patri told Pina, Mapi and Alexia in their native language. She found it too amusing how you dramatically looked for your phone yesterday. The three spaniards laughed at the story. "maybe you should help her look again" Pina stated as you rummaged through your bag.

"No! No, no, no" full of worry, you searched for your shin pads, you needed them.

"Wanna bet in 5 seconds Patri finds what she’s looking for?" Mapi challegened her team mates "we know you would win, look" la reina replied, nodding her head in your direction.

"They‘re made for each other, don‘t you think?" the young striker asked. Mapi with a mischief smile on her face looked at Alexia, her patner in crime, before she answered, "Sí"

-

"Not again!" you were angry and annoyed. No, this time it wasn‘t your phone what you‘re looking for nor your keys or any football related stuff, you‘re missing your headphones.

You unpacked every single thing out of your bag - nothing.

You looked in your jacket pockets - nothing. Trouser pocket - nothing. (They wouldn’t have fit in there but you looked there anyways)

Where could they be?!

"Cariño, what‘re looking for this time?" she smiled sympathetically at you. Sometimes she thought you would lose your head if it wasn't attached to your body. "My headphones!"

She took a step towards you, her hands went around your neck, not touching it though, but the headphones that were around it. She pulled them up, placing them on your ears. "There you go" she whispered, her hands now resting at your neck. "Thank you" you gazed in her eyes, the most beautiful you had ever seen.

"They would kiss each other If they weren‘t in the locker room" Mapi stated.

"They‘re clearly in love" Pina chipped in.

"I can only agree" said Alexia.

-

Please pick up, please pick up

"Y/n?" the sleepy voice of Patri rasped through the phone "Patri!"

"Do you know what time it is? It‘s 3am!"

"I‘m sorry, okay? But i- i don‘t know where I am and my phone will die soon" within in seconds the spaniard was wide awake, already out of bed. "What?!"

"I’m lost. Please can you get me?"

"What do you see?"

You told her about your surroundings - she knew where you were. Immediately, she ran to her car. Why the fuck would you be outside at 3 in the morning? Alone! She was furios. She ignored the speed limit, there was hardly anyone on the streets at that time anyway. Her only concern: you. How could you be so stupid and go out at that late at night. It‘s dark and your sense of direction was as good as Mapis signing. Horrible.

You sat on a bench, waiting for Patri, there was barely light, the only one came from the moon. When a car pulled up, you turned around but didn't get up. A few cars had already passed you, none of them the girl you‘re waiting for.

The car stopped abruptly as she drove onto the path which lead to you. An angry Patri stormed out of the car towards you. "Are you crazy?!" the spaniard shouted as she walked to you, "What were you thinking?" The girl was angry, more than angry. You opened your mouth to explain but- "Don‘t! Get in the car" crushed, you looked at her but followed her command, your head hung low, your eyes fixed on the floor. That was until you realized someting "no, please, no" you whispered, your hands went in all your pockets - no keys. "Don‘t you dare to say you‘ve lost your keys" Patri said as she saw how your hands went in every pocket.

"I haven‘t lost them, they‘re at home"

"Dios m��o, Y/n! One time, one time where you don‘t lose your stuff!"

"It‘s not my fault!" Now, you were getting upset. You get that she was mad at you because you woke her up and she had to drive here but there was no need to yell at you for being forgetful - you weren‘t forgetful per se you just lose your stuff and don‘t know where it was. "Who‘s fault is it then? Hm?"

"Mapi‘s!"

"¿Que?"

Now, the spaniard was confused. Why - How could it be Mapis fault? "If she hadn‘t said that stuff, i would be in bed!"

"You lose your stuff quite often huh?" the spanish defender asked as she took a seat beside you. "And Patri always knows where it is" you looked at her confused, what was she talking about? "Kinda like soulmates, don‘t you think?" she slipped her arm over your shoulders "you‘re in love with her, aren‘t you?"

"What?"

"And she‘s in love with you" she was smiling at you but you couldn‘t tell If it was a nice one or the smiles where after that blackmail would come. "It‘s cute, you know, everyone knows you’re made for each other."

"What are you talking about?"

"Gosh! You‘re always on my mind! And today was no difference but that Mapis words haunted me. That I‘m in love with you and that you’re in love with me, that we‘re soulmates because I always lose my stuff and you find it," you couldn’t stop talking, everything bubbled out of you, "I- i couldn‘t sleep so i went for a run or a walk - i don‘t know and then I got lost. I didn‘t know who to call so I called you. Look, I know you’re mad and I know it‘s three in the morning but please stop yelling at me." you were walking up and down, trying to catch your breath.

"Are you? In love with me?" she took a step towards you, stopping you in your track as she placed her arms around your hips. "Gosh Patri! We kissed one- multiple times nothing more. Don‘t be so cocky" you couldn’t describe how you felt, you felt angry and upset and so caught up in your thoughts.

"I am in love with you" she pulled your body against her own before she pressed you against the car. "I‘m in love with you since the first time you lost something" her eyes met yours, yourself still rambling about Mapis words, your own feelings and the key you had forgotten at home. "You hear me?" She pushed herself more in to yourself, her hand up to rest on your cheek - you stopped talking. "I‘m in love with you. And those kisses weren‘t nothing. They were everything," she whispered against your lips, an inch away. You could feel her breath, "i don‘t care If you lose stuff but i care about you" pulling back again, a respectable amount of space between your lips. "Do you know how terrifying it is when you get a call at 3am from the girl you love who‘s telling you that she‘s lost!" her voice got louder before it got more quiet again, "Amor, I was worried not mad at you about waking me up" your mouth agape, not believing what she‘s saying. Your brain couldn‘t process everything, only the one thing that was the most important "you love me?"

"Yeah, of course I do"

You lunge forward, pressing your lips against the spaniards, a kiss so desperately needed. Your hands grabbed her neck, pulling her impossibly closer, her hands around your waist, tightening every now and then. It was euphoric. "I do, too" you whispered against her mouth before pulling her back in.

Lost and found.

————————

[underscorewriting]

Coming back home.

Chris Redfield x reader

Warnings: angst (literally just angst)

Word count: 1538

Weeks. Maybe even months have passed since he last returned home. At first it hurt him to stay away for so long, but now? He was more unsure of how he should even explain why he stayed away for so long, why he couldn‘t have returned home. How his last mission made him have to leave a man, a friend, alone to die. How he had to pretend to kill his friends wife and kidnap his baby just to get him to go there.

How could he ever return to his family after ruining theirs? What gave him the right to have a perfect family at home when Ethan died trying to protect his?

But his family was back at home waiting for him ever since he stepped out of the front door. Leaving his wife with his baby alone. Leaving the responsibility of a loving husband and father behind him. He thought he could return soon after he left but the way things turned out to be made him dread to come back home, to tell her about what he did, what kind of man he had become and how he killed someone, sent someone to their death, for a mission.

So he turned to the only thing he knew, alcohol. He has been sitting in bars for over a month. Drink after drink in his hand. Drinking the pain and worries away the way he did before Piers found him. Only this time he can‘t forget anything, he can‘t forget the pain in Mias voice as she thought Ethan would come with Chris onto the plane, that Ethan would flee. But he went back. Nightmares haunted him ever since. Seeing himself walking back, her, his love screaming his name, sobbing. Then he‘d wake up. Drenched in sweat. He started hating himself each night a little more.

It hurt him to keep his wife in the dark about all of this, to not tell her where he is right now. Her messages got shorter, but the pain and hurt in them grew. He felt her desperation through the screen. He felt as if their connection grew weaker, not his love for her though. It wouldn‘t go away. It couldn‘t. and after everything he did these past years, her feelings didn‘t grow weak either, not even after how he was treating her right now. He didn’t respond to the texts, not one. He could imagine her hurt whenever she saw the little ‚seen‘ on the bottom of her messages. It didn‘t feel great to treat her like this, how could it? She was all he adored. And he knew he wouldn‘t stop adoring her, not for a long time.

But as her messages grew more desperate, so did his need to drink. His need to forget. His need to come home.

He couldn‘t come back. What would she think of him? Think of his actions?

As Chris was in his misery so was his wife. His wife back at home barely had any sleep, she couldn‘t, because what if Chris would come back? Text her back? Tell her that he needs help, that she should contact Leon, Jill or maybe even Claire. She had to be ready. Not one time did she think she could find her husband anywhere near a bar, not after his history of drinking. „I don‘t care what happened, please just come home. Just come home to me.“ Seen. Oh how she wished, he‘d just write the smallest respond.

Each day she cried herself to sleep, each day she only woke up to take care of their child.

„Claire stopped by today, she said I should give up on you.“

„I can‘t give up on you.“

„I don‘t want to.“

Her messages grew sadder.

„Chris, I need you home.“

„I need to know you‘re safe.“

Seen.

Seen.

Seen.

A small sign that he‘s still alive.No, a small sign that he night be still alive.

„Caroline just turned four, she misses her daddy.“

Seen.

Then one night. 6 months had passed since he first left. One night the front door opened. Loud banging was heard from downstairs, scaring her out of the little sleep she could get. She was scared, because at this point the idea of someone breaking in was more realistic than Chris coming home. It was sad, that the first thing that came to her mind was someone breaking and not her husband coming home. The banging continued, it might‘ve even grown louder, but in her state of shock she wouldn‘t be able to tell. Slowly she took one of the pistols Chris hid in their drawer. She couldn‘t handle guns. She never had to. Chris always assured her she wouldn‘t have to use it. But right now she needed it, the thought of someone hurting her, hurting her baby, filled her with fear.

Her feet quietly took her to her daughters room, stoping at the door to check on her. Nothing. A sigh of relief left her as she continued her way. At least her daughter was asleep safe and sound. Walking downstairs she heard quiet curses, causing her heart to drop.

“Chris?”

Her voice was filled with pain, she did not look like the girl, no the woman, he had left behind. In her place was a Wrack, only barely could you recognize the beauty in her. It was his fault. All of this was his fault. He did not just ruin the Winters family, no, he ruined his own. The one he worked so hard on. The one he should’ve protected and came home to.

It all dawned to him. If he would’ve just come home when the mission was done…

And for the first time in months, he allowed himself to feel.

To feel the guilt.

The anger.

The pain.

It all hit him like a truck. Crashing into his open arms, wrapping its fingers around his heart and just started squeezing. Squeezing until his eyes welled up with tears and he cried. He cried for the winters. He cried for his own family and he cried for her. For the woman he ruined. For the mother of his child. His wife. The person that supported him by everything he did, everything he ever planned. Everything he was. And him? He left her, left her alone to rot , knowing she had a hard time without him there, had a hard time in general with even just talking to people. He left her alone and ruined her. How could he do this to her?

To their daughter?

To their family?

A soft hand on his cheek made him flinch, the common touch of a lover scared him. Made him fear that he ruined it, Made him fear that if he’d open his eyes again, she would be gone. Fearing that none of this is real. That she‘s not real.

How did he even end up back at home? He didn‘t know, he didn‘t care.

He could only remember some snippets of how he got here. How the taxi driver looked at him disgusted.Had he looked so bad? He hadn`t shaved since he left home, probably reeked of whiskey. That fucking whiskey.

But nothing mattered, not now. Not the whiskey or how he got here. All that matters is the way her touch felt in his rough skin, how he was barely worth being under her gentle gaze. A sob ripped through him. A repeating mumble of apologies left his lips over and over again, tears just continued to fall, continued to soak her fingers, but she never took her hand away, she wouldn‘t dare. „Shh… it‘s okay, you‘re home. You‘re safe.“ Her whispers felt like prayers that could safe his soul, could make him forget his pain and his troubles… But they could not undo his sins. Could not undo how he killed his friend.

„I did something…“ His sobs broke her heart, the way the words left him made her heart stop for a second. „I couldn‘t safe him.“ His fingers were clawing on her arm, desperately trying to hold her closer, she did notwithstanding it, she kneeled down next to him and let him embrace her, use her for his own comfort. It did not matter to her that she was hurting in this moment or the past months. All that mattered to her was that he was there. it felt like a dream and if it was, she wouldn‘t want to wake up.

His head was nestled in the crock of her neck, the tears wouldn#t stop falling. Both of them weren’t able to tell who they were from. The pain they shared in this exact moment made them feel something, feel alive for the first time. Chris felt sober, his mind was clearer than ever before. And her? She stayed quiet, let him talk, eat him cry as tears fell from her eyes. She wasn#t crying for her broken heart, no, she was crying for the broken little boy in her arms. The boy that clung onto her like she wold disappear if he just let go.

Minutes, maybe even hours passed before both of them realized that Chris was finally home.

[rare-peach]

Snicklefritz is jealous pt 2

HEHE I can't stop

intro here

no warnings except for alcohol and a wee bit of violence (nothing graphic) // gender neutral

************************************************************************

„Snicklefritz!“ You giggled, sitting down across from Balor and Dell at the otherwise empty table. „Oh, and the leader of the Dragonguard!“ You were slightly buzzed, and Dell‘s serious scrunched-up face made you laugh. „What‘s the matter boss?“ You asked her.

„Mr. Balor said he found treasure!“ Dell exclaimed. „But he won‘t tell me anything else! He keeps ignoring me.“ She huffed, crossing her arms. Balor went to protest but you answered first. 

„Oh, is that so? Well, maybe I can drag it out of him.“ Your gaze shifted to Balor, who avoided your eyes, hand over his mouth. Weird. He was usually the flirty one...

Dell gasped. „If you find out, promise you‘ll tell me!“ 

You nodded, looking away from Balor to wink at Dell. „As an honorary Dragonguard member, I will do my best to fulfil my duty.“ 

She clapped gleefully and ran off to find Maple and Luc. You thought it was adorable the way the kids trusted you. As far as you knew, you and Balor were the only two adult slash honorary Dragonguard members. Not even Celine was allowed to join.

You turned to Balor, who was still…was he blushing? 

You felt butterflies in your stomach at the thought. He was usually so smooth, you had never seen him flustered like this. What was going on? 

„Alright then, Snicklefritz. Out with it, where‘s the treasure?“ You tease playfully, the beer in your system making you a bit more bold than usual. 

He managed a weak smile, still slightly pink. „Ignore her, (y/n). That‘s not what I was talking about.“ You raised an eyebrow. „You know how she is.“ He added, looking away. 

Ok, something was definitely up. This was far from your usual banter. 

„Also, stop calling me Snicklefritz. I‘m not like Eiland.“ He muttered but then seemed to instantly regret it, placing his hand back over his mouth. “Sorry-“

„Ok…I‘ll stop.“ You interrupted, unsure how to deal with such a serious Balor. The alcohol in you spoke again. „But only if you tell me about the treasure. Or whatever Dell was talking about.“ You tried teasing again, smiling. 

He rolled his eyes with a laugh. Ok, that‘s more like him. You relax more. 

„Wouldn‘t you like to know?“ Balor can‘t help but return to his default smirk, but inside he‘s still kicking himself. He needed to know what to do, what to say to you to get you to stay here with him and forget all the others. But he couldn‘t possibly tell you that when he had distractedly answered Dell about the „treasure“ he was actually talking about you…

„Yes, very much so. Snicklefritz.“ You beamed at him, leaning forward slightly.

He scoffed. “That’s too bad. There isn’t any.”

“C’monnn, Snicklefritz.” You giggle. “I don’t believe you!”

Balor smiles softly, your laugh melts him every time he hears it. And you were so cute. His eyes linger on your lips before he sharply inhales, composing himself. “Dell just misheard me. Besides, I know you’re loaded anyway, seeing as how I picked up that massive shipment last night.” He says slyly, trying to change the subject.

Your beer glass almost empty, you’re feeling as bold as ever and you’re not having it. You kick him under the table playfully in the shin before replying, “I can tell when you’re lying, Snicklefritz! Tell me what she was talking about, or I’ll-“

“Or what?” He cocks his eyebrow and grins at you, and you notice that he’s also leaning forward on the table.

Before you can reply, a hammered March stumbles over to your table.

“(Y/n)!” March slurs. “Why are you all the way over here? Come join me at the bar!” He grins and puts his hand on your shoulder.

You shift uncomfortably in your seat. March was always so rude, except for when he was drunk, and then he hit on you. Not exactly your type. You glance quickly at Balor, your mouth suddenly dry. He was staring at March, and he was not smiling. You never saw the two of them hang out, but you assumed that they got along just fine. Balor’s look however, which could only be described as a death stare, suggested otherwise. 

You still hadn’t answered March and he was apparently tired of waiting. He plopped down on the chair next to you. “Well, I guess I just have to come to you then.” He seems to just notice Balor sitting across. “Oh hey, Snicklefritz.” 

You froze. You could swear Balor’s eye twitched, but maybe you were imagining it. He was obviously angry though. Did they really not get along or did he hate the Snicklefritz thing that much?

“…March.” Balor said coldly. 

“So anyway, (y/n)!” March throws an arm around you. “I’ve missed you! Haven’t seen you all week!” He slurs sloppily. You ignore him, gaze instead quickly flickering over to Balor. He doesn’t meet your eyes though, he’s just staring at March. If looks could kill.

No fucking way, not this motherfucker. The whole damn town really was enamoured with you, huh? He really couldn’t blame them. Balor cursed himself for not somehow making you his right then and there when you both had first met on the bridge that fateful first day of Spring. He hated himself too, for not know what to do now. What if you liked March? Then what? Balor scrutinised the red-haired blacksmith, anger and jealousy once again coursing through his veins. 

You’re annoyed, and you try to shift away from under March’s arm. The blacksmith, however, only pulls you in you tighter. He was so drunk he couldn’t take a hint. Mortified, you can’t look at Balor. Immediately you go to try to stand up, angry at March for being disrespectful and even more angry that he was doing it in front of the guy that you actually liked. 

Your plan to flee fails however. March grabs your arm, spinning you back towards him. “Hey! Where are you going?” He exclaims. It’s less aggressive than it is just plain oblivious, but you aren’t ok with it. Before you can react, Balor is there.

March drops your arm. Balor leans over March, about a head taller than the blacksmith. He says in the coldest voice you had ever heard: “That’s enough. (Y/n) just tried to get up. They’re clearly not interested.” His fists clench and you can see his jaw twitch. 

March looks at Balor, surprised. “S-since when do you care?” March‘s brow furrows. 

You thought Balor blushed. „March,“ He growled. „Just leave it.“ 

March is not cooperating, though, and is getting upset in his drunken stupor. „C‘mon, man, you leave it.“ He goes to move around Balor towards you again, but he doesn’t make it far. You watch in utter disbelief as Balor knocks March to the ground with one swift hit to the face. 

After that, you‘re in shock, trying to process the scene that had just played out in front of you. 

March groans on the floor. Olric, Valen and Josephine rush over, everyone else just stares. Balor’s face was crimson. „Sorry, Olric…I, I just-“ Balor apologizes.

Josephine cuts in. „Olric, Balor was just standing up for (Y/n). I saw the whole thing. You know how your brother can be when he drinks.“ 

„He‘ll be fine,“ chirps Valen who is already examining the fallen March. 

Olric shrugs, as care-free as ever. „Ah-ha, yeah, let‘s just forget about this, Kay? But maybe don’t hit him so hard next time, big guy!“ Olric‘s a good brother, but obviously used to apologising for his sibling. 

Balor meets your unbreaking gaze, finally.

„Are you ok?“ You nod once but your eyes are still wide. „You don’t look ok. I mean!” He sighed at himself. “I mean, do you maybe want to get some air?“ He asks carefully.

“Yes, please.”

Balor offers you his hand and leads you out of the inn.

[ft-3racha]

hihi i wanna start off by saying omg ur writing *chefs kiss* i love it sm :D and like for a req i wanna say i've had some...horrendously down bad thoughts abt seonghwa lately sooo.... angry spice w seonghwa maybe👁️

(sorry if i disturbed but i hope u have a great day! <3)

why did you even get into a fight? long forgotten. cause all you could see, hear, feel was seonghwa. and he was angry.

„you wanna talk big and act like a brat? then fucking take it like one and live with the consequences“, he hisses before continuing to mercilessly fuck you from behind, his cock hitting that one delicious spot deep inside of you that made you see stars. „hwa“, was all you got out, too out of it to form a sentence. „look at you now. fucked you dumb already?“ his degrading words went straight to your core, your second orgasm of the night approaching fast, and after having been edged for half an hour straight before he even allowed you your first, he would now make sure to overstimulate you until you couldn’t take it anymore. „so fucking tight, can feel you squeezing me even more. is my little slut gonna cum, hm? think you deserve that?“ you nod frantically, strings of pleas leaving your mouth, eyes rolling to the back of your head. „c‘mon, make a mess. give it to me good, but don‘t expect me to stop.“ and with that, you snap as your vision whites out. your orgasm takes over you, waves of pleasure going through your entire body.

he indeed does not stop, instead he picks up his pace even more. it was all too much for you, a little „too much hwa“ escaping you before hot tears start to roll down your face. „fuck, that‘s it. cry for me, does it feel that good to get used like a toy?“ „yes“, is all you cry out before the next orgasm washes over you without a warning. seonghwa couldn‘t care less, too angry and frustrated and horny. he pounds you like there is no tomorrow, chasing his high like a man starved. „can‘t take it anymore“, you brabble, barely able to keep your eyes open, but enjoying it regardless. seonghwa loves pushing you to your limits, and you love it equally as much. „you can and you will“, he replies with a hard slap to one of your already reddened asscheeks,

„you might talk big, but at the end of the day you better not forget who this ass belongs to.“

_____

thank you for your kind words anon…and for this ask!! <3 (remember that my requests are always open until stated otherwise. so feel free to send me your thoughts and i’ll try to bring them to life!!)

[fieldofdaisiies]

read below for a small snippet | read the whole fic on ao3 | masterlist

Even hours after the incident the shock still sits deep. Panic is still like a vice around his heart, making it hard to breathe or focus on anything. His hands are still trembling uncontrollably, her sobs a faint echo in his ears. Eris can barely get down enough air to level his breathing. Having to patch her up while her tears ran uncontrollably opened wounds from his own childhood that have never gotten a chance to fully heal. His heart lies in shards because of his own stupidity.

Her sobbing, he knows, will haunt him for days. It still echoes in his ears and he will never forget that he was the reason why she got hurt. He knows with her fae healing powers, the harm having been done to her skin will fade within hours, but she got hurt because he didn’t pay attention, she ran away and only Mother knows what could have happened to her. He was heedless, focused on his High Lord business rather than on her — that is something will never be able to forgive himself for.

He is shaking uncontrollably, even after minutes in Azriel’s hold and hearing the shadowsinger‘s soothing voice whisper words of comfort in his ear. But he can barely listen to them or make out a single word his mate says. The blood rushing in his ears from the still-there horror drowns out everything else. Whenever he closes his eyes all he sees are the tears running down his daughter’s cheeks, and the blood pooling from her knee.

And then there is fury and hate, burning like a wildfire through his veins. Fury and hate directed at himself because when he found her, he had nothing better to do than shout. She was in pain and he shouted, like the monster his father was.

He is just like him. Just like Beron. Beron always used to shout at him when he got angry, so loud that every little mouse in every little nook and corner of the Forest House could hear him. Beron even shouted at him when he was sobbing, cowering on the ground with his hands thrown over his head. He even shouted when he locked him into the closet, or the dungeons and Eris could barely breathe from crying so hard.

Just like him. Just like him. Just like him. Just like him. The words echo in his mind, and his heartbeat picks up again. He fists Azriel‘s leathers, clawing at them until the shadowsinger pulls away, then crouches down in front of his mate. Eris is still sitting in the arm hair he has been waiting in for hours after the incident. Waiting for his mate’s return, full of shame and agony, to tell him what happened. He expected Azriel to hate him for it. To be angry with him, and not want to speak to him again. Azriel’s reaction surprised him.

"We are only fae, things like these can happen." Azriel strokes his thumb over the back of Eris‘ hand.

"But they shouldn’t happen. I was careless and—"

"You made a mistake. But mistakes are natural. Every parent makes a mistake once in their life. We are not almighty, my love, we can‘t protect her from everything." Azriel lifts their intertwined hands to his lips, kissing Eris‘ knuckles. "I mean it. And additionally, we shouldn’t protect her from everything. She has to learn and find out things on her own, even if they cause her a scratched knee or a broken bone." Azriel tries to search Eris‘ gaze, but the Autumn Court male only shakes his head, a bitter gesture that makes some tears fly away.

continue on ao3

Azris tags: @azrielsbabyg @lady-riel @moonlightazriel @aayo-whatt @brekkershadowsinger @ladyelain @banasheefan56 @a-frog-with-a-laptop @ofduskanddreams @acourtofladydeath @secret-third-thing @born-to-riot @jules-writes-stories @unanswered-stars @christeareads @mistandmemories @bookishbroadwaybish @c-starstuff-man0 @talibunny30 @nestasgoodside @baileybird71 @molcat07 @the-darkestminds @jules-writes-stories @mistandmemories @brunetterebel010 @chunkypossum

for @erisweekofficial💛

[neobora]

how did you got out of the cycle where you know what to do, i 100% intellectually understand everything about the law. but its so difficult to apply and i do know im making myself feel stuck but idk how to completely rid of the feeling of getting discouraged once i fall back to the old state, and trying and trying

you are forgetting who you really are.

right now you are identifying with the outer man, you have to work for your manifestations, youre struggling, youre stuck. but that‘s just the inner man THINKING he is the outer man! build up faith and trust in yourself by realising you are the only one who chooses what gets expressed into the 3d.

To the Inner Man EVERYTHING ALREADY IS TRUE, not to the outer. IT ALREADY IS SO, to the Inner Man. There is no convincing necessary, no 1,000 affirmations, no repeating over and over hoping it works, IF YOU IDENTIFY YOURSELF WITH THE INNER MAN. If you claim to be the One Within, you will find it incredibly easy, I will say natural, to FEEL what you want. Pay attention to what I am saying: When you imagine your "end" is it not ALREADY SO? You did not imagine "How" to get there, you are already there in imagination. Your issue is NOT in imagining the end, your issue lies in who you are identifying yourself with. If you imagine yourself in the end, which is easy, but then you identify yourself with the outer-man, you will breed nothing but frustrations. However, if you first identify yourself with the One Within, and then imagine your end, you will not question if you "are going to get it," you HAVE IT! The Inner Man always has it. He see's the end, he is the one who creates his own fate. The Inner Man is his own destroyer and redeemer. Identify yourself with the inner man. The immortal you. Not this body nor this outer-life. If you want freedom, love, joy, happiness, confidence. If you want to be a King/Queen, treated like a god/goddess, loved beyond your wildest dreams, then identify yourself with the INNER MAN. The Inner Man can have all those desires fulfilled because Imagination is infinite. - Edward Art (Self Identification)

!!!!!!

it‘s really all about your self identification. you can imagine the most beautiful scenes, but if you go back to feeling like nothing manifests, you‘re stuck, manifesting is hard, what do you think will happen? it gets expressed. completely surrender yourself to your REAL SELF, the one within.

If entering into a New State within you is challenging it is because you have not accepted who you are within. You are not a State, but its God. As God within, whose permission are you asking for? To whom do you answer to? If there is only One Being within you, then who can stop you? -Edwart Art (Unconditional Thinking)

completely free yourself in your imagination! here you are god, you are only stuck if you feel that you are so. but the great thing is, you can choose what you identify with and what you feel to be true. NO ONE IS FORCING YOU TO FEEL LIKE YOU CAN‘T MANIFEST EXCEPT YOURSELF.

when you get doubts, take a step back and look at them from the Inner Man‘s perspective: do i really want this to be true? no. then i won‘t identify with it. it can‘t hurt me if i say it can‘t. and then KNOW that because you are the Inner Man, you can choose what you accept as real. accept something great to be real and feel it to be completely true! no one else can do it except you.

so what i am trying to get across is you choose EVERYTHING you identify with. if you say you are god, you have all the power, then STAY IN THAT STATE! don’t give attention to doubts. why would you want to identify with something less than you actually are? it‘s all your choice.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

About you last post, I think a reason why the show took such a weird and concerning direction of Adrien having this therapy role, I don‘t really believe that the writers take Marinette‘s PTSD serious (at least outside of derision). The whole show her „weirdness“ was played off as comedy (TA said so himself in a tweet a while back) and the phone call scene you were describing also had vibes of making Mari look quirky like „haha look she still can‘t be normal about her bf“.

The worst part is that I feel like the writers could actually write good mental health representation but only when the plot demands it. Adrien being visibly depressed in s4? Makes for good drama. Adrien forgetting all his problems after he gets with Mari? Well duh love solves everything. Marinette having a panic attack? Makes the scene where she looses the miraculous more intense. Almost every other instant of her panicking? Hehe funny.

The whole show her "weirdness“ was played off as comedy (TA said so himself in a tweet a while back)

Oh, her weirdness was absolutely supposed to be read as comedic pre-Derision. I never consider those jokes funny, but they were very clearly jokes. In fact, it always weirded me out when people took her actions seriously because those people never applied that logic to the other absurdist humor used in the show.

My go-to example is Party Crasher. If you're up in arms about Marinette being a "stalker", but aren't equally or even more concerned by a bunch of adult men just randomly showing up to hang out with a group of 14-year-olds, then maybe you're holding the teenage girl to an unreasonable standard and ignoring the fact that she's written by a bunch of adult men who clearly think that teenage girls act like fangirls around their real-life crushes.

Marinette is not a real person. She's a character in an absurdist romantic comedy aimed at kids. Her actions have to be judged in that light if you want to make any sort of good-faith analysis.

The problem is Derision and the choice to make all of Marinette's Adrien-based-behavior a PTSD response. Once you go that route, the absurdist humor excuse is dead in the water.

Absurdist humor is all about making things so ridiculous that you can't take them seriously. For example, Marinette having Adrien's schedule for the next week isn't absurd because that schedule exists. She could absolutely get her hands on it! Her having his schedule for the next 3 years? That's absurd. You can't take it seriously because it's impossible for her to have a schedule that goes that far into the future. It would have, at most, a handful of events because you just don't schedule most things that far in advance.

But if you have Marinette do a big, dramatic confession where she shows Adrien the schedule and apologizes for it? Then none of that matters. the absurdist nature of it goes away because you have treated it seriously and absurdist humor is all about not treating the absurd too seriously. Derision was the equivalent of that big dramatic confession. You can no longer use absurdist humor to justify anything Marinette does and, notably, they don't. She's massively toned down post Derision and things are being taken more seriously with her and Adrien actively working on her behavior, which is a problem because this is also true:

I don‘t really believe that the writers take Marinette‘s PTSD serious

They've given her a serious issue, they're taking it seriously enough to have Adrien and Marinette address it, but they're not being serious about how you'd treat PTSD and that is the worst possible way to approach this issue. I'd be happier if they just flat out ignored it or used magic love to heal it with a kiss and never addressed it again.

When writing comedy aimed at kids, there's a thing that I like to call The Seat Belt Principle. If you've ever seen a show where a kid character was about to launch themself off in a rocket, only to fasten their seat belt first, then you've seen this principle in action. It's the idea that, in a kids show, you can have wild things happen so long as it's something that a kid can't emulate. If a kid can emulate it, then you have to take it more seriously. This is why kid characters always fasten their seat belts even if it's pointless because the child audience needs to see seat belts as cool and a thing that you always use.

The Seat Belt Principle applies to more than physically dangerous situations. If you are portraying any serious, real-life issue in a kids show, then you need to handle it differently than something that a kid will never face. To put it another way, Ladybug can have ignorant parents, Marinette cannot. Sabine and Tom not knowing that their daughter is a superhero? Not a problem, superheroes aren't real. Sabine and Tom not knowing that their daughter is experiencing horrific bullying or even straight up ignoring it? Big problem, bullies are very real.

This is where we get to the mental health stuff. A lot of media treats mental health issues as something that can be solved via romance and nothing could be further from the truth. Romantic partners can make the fight easier, but they shouldn't be your whole army if you can help it. The show doesn't seem to get this.

As you pointed out, the show keeps giving the characters metal health issues for drama and then hand waving those issues away via romantic relationships and that's a big yikes for me. You don't have to introduce mental health issues into your romantic comedy, but once you do, you have a responsibility to portray them accurately. They clearly don't want to do that and that's why season five's love square romance is a hard pass for me. There's a world of difference between bad jokes and bad mental health rep. I can overlook one, the other is a personal pet peeve and I've seen the negative consequences in action first hand. I think we all have! Who isn't familiar with the concept of a person being confused that "X is still depressed? But they got that new job/have a new SO/got engaged/etc."

[call-sign-shark]

The Blue Hurricane and the Mustache Man|| Modern! Arthur Shelby x Reader

Summary:  Arthur almost regretted his decision to accommodate you that time he was shaving and you decided to mess with him... MASTERLIST.

general context: He's a former soldier and a drug addict trying to get better. You are an unhinged punk girl living in the streets. You weren't supposed to meet... And now Arthur's fate and yours are forever entangled.

Words: 1.4K

TW: Mention of drug use and craving, PTSD but otherwise it's funny and cute

Notes: This work is related to Pop Goes the Rat, which explains how Arthur and Reader met, as well as the whole context behind this Modern AU. However, you can read the two-part separately.

1 # The Mustache Man

“Hey old dog! Where are the ice cubes?”

You yelled from the kitchen, standing in front of the open fridge as you looked for the ingredients to make a fresh homemade lemonade. The fact remained that no one answered you. No reply. You closed the fridge and walked to the corridor, “Arthur?” You reiterated, louder, but only silence answered your call. Now you were sincerely pissed — why couldn’t he answer? After all, he was shaving in the bathroom at the end of the corridor, not in the garden or something. That was how you decided to burst the bathroom door open with one kick. Arthur jumped at the sudden loud noise, causing his razor to slip and cut his cheeks.

“Aouchhhh.” He hissed through gritted teeth.

“Hey fucker, care to reply?” You attacked him, your tiny fists on your hips, a cherry lollipop between your teeth, and the most angry pout you could make etched on your juvenile face. The soldier turned around and glared at you. He had still a bit of shaving cream from here and there on his face.

“Can‘t leave me alone for ten fookin’ minutes eh?!” 

“Where are the ice cubes?” You asked, teeth bared.

“In the bloody fridge, ye stupid brat! And, God! How many times should I tell ye to put some fookin’ clothes on?!” Arthur grunted, noticing you were only wearing an oversized t-shirt and black panties. Nothing else. 

“Hey. It’s not my fault if the temperatures are intense! Even my freakin’ vagina is sweating!” You exclaimed.

Arthur looked at you with a half-confused and half-desperate look on his face before shaking his head.  Okay, you were definitely bonkers. Straight out of the local mental hospital, he thought. Then, he noticed a second detail that made him frown,  “Wait. Is that me t-shirt?” 

“… Eeeeh. No?” 

“You stole one of me shirts.” He stated, “You live in me house for free and you steal me clothes… I swear I’m within an inch of kicking you rat ass.”  He growled, before focusing back on shaving his beard all the while mumbling and cursing you, “Fookin’ kid who annoys me the hell out… Should have let ye sleep outside,  should have never welcomed ye here I swear you’re such a pain in the ass, running half naked, stealing shits, and sleeping in me bloody bed.��  He stopped rambling when he realized you were still here, staring at him with your eyes squinted and your blue-haired head slightly tilted on the side, “What’s wrong with ye, stinky rat? Wanna fight?!” He barked, a bit more aggressively than he attended. 

“You’re forgetting plenty of hairs. And you're holding it wrong — see? You’ve plenty of small cuts on your ugly-ass face.” You said, your tone quieter than it was one minute ago. 

“Can’t you mind your own business, eh?”  

“Tsss! Lemme do it.” You did not let him have the time to react nor to truly understand your suggestion — and you did not care. What you did though was to grab him by the arm and force him to sit on the toilet lids. 

“What are ye doing?!” 

“Ah! Shut up Arthur! Shut the fuck up and stay still.” You scolded him. At first, he wanted to push you and tell you to go screw yourself, but words choked in his tight throat the moment you sat on his lap and straddled him, the weight of your small body pressing against his. Before he could even realize what was happening, you snatched the razor from him with one hand and grabbed him by the chin with the other. Arthur’s wide-opened eyes finally met yours, “There.” You finally said with a surprisingly soft voice he did not expect to hear from your foul mouth. You started to shave him, not minding the astounded expression on his face.

Surprisingly enough, the way the blade slid on his skin was so smooth he didn’t feel anything. Arthur relaxed a little bit. His brows frowned slightly as he observed you from that close. His steel-blue irises, hardened by the war and one suicide attempt, captured every tiny detail of your broken-doll face: the shape of your eyes, the juicy flesh of your lips as well as the black stains of your slightly runny makeup... Arthur sighed, his blazing breath caressing your skin. At one point, you almost lose your balance, though.

“Hey careful! Yer not a fookin’ Peaky Blinders! Don’t cut me face with blade nor slit me bloody throat!”

"Oopsie?"

"She almost sliced me and she says "hihi oopsie", tsss..."

It was how the soldier came to the conclusion that holding your hips to keep you stable was a good idea.  A weird wave of warmth blossomed in your stomach when his large and strong hands grabbed you firmly, but still, you decided to ignore it.

“Okay, I’m almost done.” You put the razor in the sink and grabbed a towel to clean Arthur’s face. Once everything was done, you pressed an annoying kiss on his cheek —he growled in response— and stood up. Somehow, he was a bit disappointed when your body left his. Still, you took two steps back to admire your masterpiece with the biggest and sharkiest smile plastered on your bratty face, “Hey Arthur. Nice mustache.”  You blurted out.

“What? OH! DON’T TELL ME YE DID THIS!” Arthur almost jumped from the toilet lid to check his face in the mirror. With one panicked hand, he started to pat his cheek while his piercing steel blue eyes looked at the horrible thing you had left under his nose, “WHAT THE FOOK.” 

You burst into a crazy ass laughter, delighted by the way he reacted to his new style. 

“Shave it off! Shave this awful mustache off! Look at me face?!” He turned to you and grabbed you by the shoulder a bit too fiercely, "I look like a fookin' grandpa!"  

“Okay okay, calm down fucker! Imma shave it. You’re so boring!” You complained, rolling your eyes and stomping the floor with your bare feet to show your discontent, "So boooring!" You reiterated. Looking forward to getting rid of the mustache, he sat a second time and let you straddle him but this time, his arms locked around your waist so strongly you could not help but yelp in surprise, “The hell you’re doing?!”

“Ain’t gonna let you go as long as you don’t shave the mustache.” The gravel in his voice was highlighted with genuine military authority, "So hurry the fuck up before I smash yer head against the wall."

“Alright, no need to be so mean.” Resigning yourself, you grabbed the razor for a second time. You were about to shave him when you stopped in the middle of your motion to look him right in the eyes though. With your brows slightly frowned, you brought your face so close to his that the top of your noses bumped together. Arthur, stunned, stopped breathing. He wanted to say something but the thing is he could not — his words didn’t want to leave his throat, petrified by the proximity between you. And, somehow, his soul didn’t want you to back off.

 Silence fell above the bathroom as your little and cold fingers grazed his upper lips. 

Boom. Boom. 

The beating of his heart quickened for each time your skin brushed his, he would feel a surge of electricity running his whole body. Had her perfume always been so sweet? He thought. Arthur gathered all his strength to focus on something else but he could not  — his steel blue irises inevitably fell on your slightly parted lips, between which he could see your tongue playing with the lollipop. A shaky breath escaped from his mouth. Gosh… How bad he wanted to kiss you. To taste the sugar of the candy straight from your flesh. 

“You should keep it.” Your voice snatched him from his thoughts.

“Eh?” Arthur said, blinking several times to get a grip on himself.

“You should really keep the ‘stache.” 

“Go fook yourself baby doll, I ain’t keeping it!” He grunted, showing his teeth like a wounded wolf. Baby doll — it had escaped from his mouth before he could even realize it 

“But it suits you well! I mean, I did it as a joke but it looks really good on you!!”

“You kid me right?” He raised a brow, “No way.” 

“Ohhhh please!! Pretty please Arthur, pleasepleaseplease!” You begged, suddenly bouncing on his lap, “pleaaaase! I'll be super nice and quiet for a whole day if you keep it just a lil' while!”

Another surge. Arthur's jaw clenched, the movements of your body making erotic thoughts dawn in his mind. “STOP THAT, EH.”  He tightened his grip on your hips to keep you from moving, his cheeks burning all of sudden for blood had rushed to his face. The soldier let out an angry sigh and looked at you, sighing. To be true, he had tried to send you off — he had really tried his best, but there was something in your adorable pout and your big shiny smile that got him on his knees, and it frustrated him even more. As annoying as you were,  he couldn’t refuse you anything because he ultimately liked the way your beautiful eyes lightened up when you smiled — or the melody of your bratty laugh, “Alright…”

“So you’re keeping it?! Really??”

“Just for the week-end. Off the 'stache goes after this delay. Got it?" He grunted, one brow raised.

"Got it. I'll obey your orders" You whispered, your fingers losing themselves in his slicked-back hair, " You know why?"

"Hm?"

"Because you're fookin' Peaky Blinders." You teased.

"... Get fucked."

♠️ Any comment, review, reblog, or constructive criticism is welcome. Your reactions really motivate me and keep me alive, so please don't be shy. English is not my first language.

♠️ Tag list: @1nterstellarcha0s

[creepichan]

My dream about Logan, Thomas, Virgil and Orange

Okay so. I had a dream about a new episode and was so raw and cool, i had to write it down somewhere.

Note: in my dream i was so excited that I jumped to parts of the episode, not being able to watch it in one piece. It also had an unimportant sideplot so the “scene” has cuts here and there.

Thomas has some problem and orange starts to take over. Framing orange as „rage“. But Thomas is unaware of this and just gets angrier every day

At one point he sits at a table with virgil and talks with him about smth. Until Thomas breaks out in a lighthearted chuckle and says:

„Oh virgil, thats why from all the sides I hate you the most“ Smiling calmly, as if he didnt just drop the rawest line of the whole series.

And virgil is understandably shocked and doesn‘t know how to respond

Then commercial break. Side plot stuff happens until there is a cut back to the mainplot.

Later same setting but with Logan. Thomas called him because Logic would surely be able to help him.

Thomas wasn‘t understanding himself. Why he was so angry at seemingly nothing. Why he told virgil that he hated him. He was angry and yet panicked.

Logan listened to him rant but felt the orange aura pressing into the foreground. Within Thomas and himself.

At one point Logan knew he had to leave. So he stood up and tried to brush Thomas off.

„Nope sorry thomas, nothing that can be done“

„But can‘t we-„

„I apologize, you‘ll have to figure that one out yourself. I am no help here“

Which he said very fastly, as his main focus was to get out of the situation. Leaving Thomas by himself and his turmoil of feelings.

(Also a little detail, during the whole thing Logan was stressed out too but did a good job at hiding it. He even had his tie untied and hanging over his shoulders. He looked like he didnt get much sleep)

From here on out I was freaking out with excitement, since I felt a plot arc coming I had anticipated for a long time. So i kept rewinding to watch scenes again. And hovering my cursor to different parts of the timeline and seeing little previews. So this is why I only remember the following in little parts of different scenes:

⁃ Logan in the bathroom, having his Jekyll and Hyde moment with Orange.

⁃ Logan trying to calm himself

⁃ Logan puking out something orange

⁃ Logan trying to clean his shirt and making himself presentable again

⁃ Stitching his tie back together again

⁃ Only slowly calming down again and managing to separate himself from the anger

While all of this, Thomas is talking with his therapist and friends. Making him slowly calm down again and returning to his normal self. Which was the reason for orange letting go of Logan again.

Then i woke up. I got too excited xD

The reason I was so hooked on this was because we could see a direct connection between Thomas and his sides. Orange not only influencing the side but Thomas and his behavior as well. And vice versa too!

We saw Thomas as this angry, violent and out-of-character person. Which felt really intense. Also seeing Logan lose control like that was… something.

So yes. Im sorry if this makes little sense. I wrote this right after waking up so i wouldn’t forget.

[sadkidwithocs]

I just called to say I love you

I just called to say how much I care

I just called to say I love you

And I mean it from the bottom of my heart 💕🌸💐🌷🌻

Big Fanart of Faren, my 2019oc and his wrestling friend, Adrian Adonis🌸💐I drew maybe 1 month ago but take long time for writing their stories in English😂😂

Ok I post about Faren’s information already. And this post I’ll mention about one of his wrestling friends, Start with no.1 Adrian Adonis, a good friend/ big brother whose known him since they both was brown hair YoungLion..before go to WWF

*these pics below are low quality, high quality pics are following in Faren’s story end credit*

[Faren’s part]

My lovely brothers, Keith Adonis Franke a.k.a Adrian Adonis. He’s one of Raymond and my close friends since before we go to WWF, but reason why I still close with him because we are all obsessed with “Biker lifestyle”/ very long-winded, never stop talking😎 (different from Raymond whose more polite and taciturn / we love dressing as biker but Adonis’ style is better than me lol he spend so much money for this!

Adonis is older than me 7 years, chubby but good-looking/ nice hairstyle/ sassy man and big-mouth…and seems he doesn’t care about his weight that much. In the past we often go everywhere by our big bike/ ride in the same car, but when we both are in WWF we have different role, Adonis is heel but I’m babyface, have different locker room/ everybody has his own friends whose have the same role& same personalities and similar in age.. now we shouldn’t acting like close friend when go outside.

Adonis is funny person/ tough and good worker for someone…and sometimes he’s sassy man and like to act cocky for someone too, and one of these people are Lanny Poffo, one of my the first friends in WWF and Danny Spivey, one of dumbass Mike’s close friend.

I don’t know it can calls “luckily” or not that I’m one of persons whose don’t have any problem with him.. maybe just because we don’t have match to fight together eventhough we have similar style (or gimmick) that about biker. We never have any problem about comparing who is better or who should be owner of biker gimmick, we have many difference in their own way.

The fact that we have different role, we must act in different personality traits sometimes, and because we’re famous wrestlers to some extent , when we go outside we often see some fangirls excited to us and stop to say hi��

Babyface like me must wave and say hi back to her even though that time I’m in a bad mood/ tired/ hungry or bored😐

But for Adonis when he notices some fangirl say hi,

He just act cold and said “get back in da house! ” . that’s why sometimes I jealous to some heel wrestlers that can be honest with their feelings🫤but at the same time Vince and Pat Patterson doesn’t allow me to have heel role too!

Look at this👇🏻. It’s funny that we both dye our hair to blonde following some “backstage person” ‘s advice (Vince? Pat Patterson? or some bookers? I’m not sure who the hell is owner of these idea)

(Umm🫤idk I can call it’s just “advice” or not !?… I think I should use this word instead, “wanting” 🤔 I mean.. if some wrestlers don’t abide by the plans of boss’ idea , We can‘t know about our fate (wrestling role) in the future. They make you shine but they can ruined you also. Me/ Adonis and Dino Bravo are one of the people who agreed to dye our hair to blonde following their advise inevitably

Adonis must dye his hair bc he has gay gimmick of flower shop. Man.. he gain so much weight! Nobody can stop him! Ok I know that this guy is reckless, my I just can’t believe he can be reckless in this way too! 💀

I must dye my hair bc some backstage guy told me to “being more American”. Everyone knew I was the son of famous Hawaiian wrestlers “Ailani Kamealoha”, I have brown hair like my dad , but someone tried to change my identity, make wrestling fans forget everything whose son I am and where did I come from. Now I have become an American biker from Texas USA not Honolulu..I only talk about the biker lifestyle, dressing fashionably, Do not mention anything related to Hawaii or mention to my father who was a Hawaiian warrior.

Moreover, sometimes I have to act flirty, even though in fact I’m like my dad…clumsy and not good at flirting at all , I am not allowed to say that I have 3 children too🤥(yeah I’m jealous a little bit when my senior, Tito bring his 3sons and wife to WWF show)

Ok, back to Adonis. I want to share one of He has ever buy Pepsi for me during we are fixing a big bike(he often go out and back with some snacks).. but that time I keep that Pepsi can in my bag before bring it to hometown in Texas together and forget it in my house, and I wasn’t go back to my house for a few year after that. And not many months later, Adonis left WWF and goes to AWA and I’ve never saw him again.

Believe or not.. until this day in 2024 I still keep that can in my shelf that full of 80-90s stuffs. Seiji, my son doesn’t know anything often ask me to throw it in garbage because it’s expire food but I stop him😑

ok I accept the truth that I have some “old man habits” whose like to collect little nonsense things not only about biker stuffs. But I can’t help it! 🤷🏻this is the last stuff that my close friend gave it to me.

Stories between me and Adonis are just a short part of my whole career story, he passed away from car accident in 1988. Eventough we’re not close that much after we’re in WWF because we have their own friends/ own roles but I can’t refuse that Adonis is good brother for me and my fond memories include Adrian as one of them. He’s gone too fast, that’s the reason why I feel like…I still have unresolved issues and still not used to accept that he’s gone to somewhere. I still imagine if we both are 60 years old men, have white hair, sit together, drink some beer and share crazy journey of our wrestling career. I love you my brother, tell wrestling friends up there I said hi

[yubellia]

Some thoughts about Lila Rossi/Cerise Bianca/ Iris Verdi (Part 3)

Happy new year! I hope you all had a nice start to the new year 2025.

Since we are officially in 2025 now and season 6 is supposed to start early 2025 (I saw something about February or maybe even late January whoo!), we can now say „tick tack, tick tack. The clock is ticking!“

This is part 3. you find part one and two with my masterlist on my blog.

This thought came to me out of nowhere. It could actually serve as a hint, that Lila/Cerise is not even a kid.

I am talking about her multiple identities. If you think about it logically (and trust me, I know I should not search for logic in a cartoon) it makes no sense to sign up for a new school with a fake name. I mean, those grades in school mean nothing if they don‘t match with your personal ID later.

How is Cerise planning to live? Get a job? I mean I get it. Cerise does not want an ordinary job and life anyway. That much is clear. But how will she manage that unless she fakes her personal ID later too, to match the other documents?

They are trying to show us that Cerise is smart and skilled but it only points to her doing stuff she should not be able to do as a teenager. By the end of season 5 (according to the wiki) Cerise is 15 years old at most. Meaning the characters should be roundabout 15 to 17 years old in season 6. I can only speak for Germany but France is our neighbor so that counts. Here, when you turn 16, you need to get a personal ID. You need a way to proof who you are!

So you see the problem? Also let’s not forget that cerise must have started these fake life’s before she even encountered Marinette or slightly after that. Which brings us back to the question of ‚why would she do that?‘

However, maybe there is a logical explanation for that.

Maybe, her fake identities aren’t even fake identities. At least not completely. What if, she uses her second or third name to introduce herself? Like, officially she is registered as ‚Lila Cerise Rossi-Bianca‘ in school documents but she only introduces herself as ‚Lila Rossi‘? All she has to do is go to the teachers or principal and say „you see, my name is a bit long. Just Lila Rossi would be nice.“ Bam! Problem solved. As long as they aren’t slipping up. Marinette technically also has both last names of her parents after all.

That’s also why I think Mrs. Rossi is the most likely one to be her real mother. I mean she is barely there but she works at an embassy. So I think Cerise would be able to learn some things if she payed attention. Especially about stuff like „what paperwork do I need to build a new identity.“

For the next part, we have to enter the leak territory. Allegedly, Cerise wants to use her wish in order to swap life’s with Marinette.

I saw people online who claim that „it won‘t change anything! Even if she takes Marinettes life, she will still have her personality.“ and to this I have to say „you are wrong!“

Why? Because your character is not finished when you are born. Our character is the result of our experiences, the stuff we learned and our emotions, how people treat us.

We don‘t know anything really about Cerise. Nothing we can be sure of at least. Technically, those 3 mothers could be her mothers. Or something close to that at least. She could have a stepmom. We don‘t know anything about her dad after all.

If she really did not have a good life, than Marinette could end up like her if they swap life’s and start at zero. Cerise is not just a liar, she has clear narcissistic tendencies. And those are nurtured when you don‘t get enough attention as a child. It’s one of the reasons mostly seen with adults at least. There is more to it of course.

In other words, swapping life’s with Marinette could have serious consequences for everyone if Cerise manages to do it.

——————————————————

There is so much we don‘t know about her yet and so much we can theorize about. I honestly can‘t wait for season 6 to start. It’s not much longer.

See you all soon. Maybe to a new theory or whatever I do next.

[batwingsrosa]

Why i will always stand with Severus Snape and why he is my favorite character

We choose our favorite characters- perhaps because they remind us of ourselves- or they embody certain qualities that we admire.

We choose them, because we recognize a part of ourself within them. Because something in their story made us empathize with them.

Obviously there are multiple reasons and they aren‘t the same for everyone.

Severus Snape reminds me of myself.

He grew up being abused and neglected- by his parents and his peers.

Ignored and silenced by other adults who should have stood behind him.

Being let down, by the only person he had a true connection with.

As a child he was beaten, cast aside. As a teenager he was bullied relentlessly.

This abuse shaped him.

Without the influence of a loved one, he was destined to choose the wrong path.

As a direct result Severus grew up to become a bitter and resentful adult.

Trauma doesn‘t just leave you. Once it has left its mark, you can‘t ever erase it. No matter how much you want to.

I was neglected as a child. Cast aside and abused as a teenager.

People bullied me without mercy.

When i grew up,i was bitter and resentful. I was mean and easily angered. I was broken.

I was were he was.

My past shaped me.

But i made the decision to move on. I left the old places and people behind and vowed to never come back.

Turning away from all that was what helped me start healing.

I couldn‘t even imagine what i would have become if i had stayed.

Many years have passed since then, but the traumas and the pain inflicted on me, will stay with me forever. They are what made me who i am today. I can‘t forget them and i can‘t make any of it undone.

And neither could he.

But he couldn‘t leave any of it behind. He kept his childhood house at Spinners end.

Where his father beat him and neglected him.

Where he was never loved.

He had to stay at Hogwarts- the place, where he thought he would be safe- but never was. Because from the moment he put his foot on that train, James Potter was after him.

Who made his life living hell afterwards. Because i quote: „He exists.“

He stayed where he was hurt. He stayed with people who had hurt him.

He kept himself imprisoned in a cage of guilt over Lily Potters death and he did not allow himself to heal.

Why do i like him? Why is he my favorite?

Because he is a part of me. He is someone i was before. And at the same time is someone that i could have been, had i not moved on.

I understand him and i can feel his pain.

Almost every inch of it.

When i was at my lowest. He was there for me.

And that is, why i will be there for him. Why i will be loyal to him and stand by him.

Always