#why are you portraying this grown adult woman as younger than she is?? could it be because she's disabled and asian? surely not

[glitter-stained]

The thing you need to remember about comics ages and timelines is that yeah it's messy there are retcons at stuff and it will never be clear and perfect. But also, DC has an interest portraying age the way they do. They have an interest in aging Barbara down so she can be Dick's pretty girlfriend with whom he raises a cute dog (and maybe a cute little family next perhaps?). They have an interest in trying to keep Tim young and draw him younger than he looks so they can milk his Robin's popularity for as long as possible. They have an interest in drawing Jason to make him look 40 when Bruce slits his throat, to make him look like a grown man fighting a teenager when fighting Mia even though they're the same age (though i mantain that mia is a little bit older), in having him call Tim kid even though they're the same age, in having him offer Tim a drink and Tim pointing out he's not legal when Jason isn't either. They have an interest in Jason looking older in Jim Aparo's art style in ADITF than he looked in precrisis or in 308. They have an interest in Steph magically looking older in War Games, where she gets tortured and brutally murdered, than the fun colourful round and much more youthful art from her Robin run. There are probably many more examples but bottom line it's not fucking innocent. DC knows how to hire artists that know how to draw children it's really not that hard. Characters who look young, characters who remind you that they are young, create more empathy; which is good when you want the public to continue to root for them, and bad when those characters challenge the status quo or that excess of empathy might create pushback after you decide to have them brutally murdered. DC can't have Batman grievously wounding and causing the death of his underage son, but if he looks as old as Batman? DC can't have Jason making a valid point about vigilantism being unsafe for Mia and relating with her with childhood sexual abuse subtext because it makes the heroes (and especially Batman) look bad, but if it looks like this is a grown ass man harassing a teenage girl, then it's clear who is the villain, it's okay, no problem. DC needs Barbara to be younger so the power dynamic between her and Dick fits their idea of a perfect little nuclear family much better and they can shove Barbara back into the role of Batgirl even though she is very much a girl rather than a woman. DC needs Steph to look older when she's tortured so they can be edgy without people being too horrified at them doing something horrifying, DC needs Jason and Steph to look older on the day they die because young looking= innocent which makes it so much harder to victim-blame. DC needs Mia to look younger than Jason so they can make it look like the good old "good victim/bad victim" dichotomy and even though that's not what the story is actually about, regardless of how much it disrespects Mia's character to do so. DC needs Jason to look ugly because it's harder to empathize with ugly people and it makes it so much clearer who is the bad guy and who is the good one, and it's a much easier dichotomy, so much more comfortable than challenging the whole mythos around which Batman is built. DC needs Barbara to be sexy in their traditional male-gaze way, because this is the audience they're trying to appeal to.

So like, I know that I'm nit-picking when I say "actually according to any and all logic Jason is younger than Tim by a couple of months and than Mia by around three years". Or when I say "they should bring back Dickbabs' old age difference" or even interact with Dickbabs as if they still have that difference and refuse to interact with Tom Taylor's version of the ship. I know comics are incoherent and the timeline is messy; but just because it's messy, just because it's always been, doesn't mean it's innocent. So I'm gonna keep nitpicking, and I'm gonna stay an annoying bitch, because I refuse to allow comics to manipulate me out of my empathy. And because I don't see everything and am very aware of how easy it is to be manipulated even when you're careful, I encourage you to add to this with things you've noticed whether it's in portrayal or in art about character age, appearance, or any other device they might use to manipulate our perception of the characters -and what narrative these resorts serve.

[thiefcats]

Why you aren't, but should be shipping Mihawk and Perona together, an essay.

First of all, Perona and Mihawk are adults. When they met, Perona was 23 and Mihawk was 41. Yes, this is an eighteen year age gap, but I want to start with this because it's the primary reason I see for people not liking the ship. After two-three years living under the same roof, by the time Perona leaves to go find Moria she is 25-26 and he is 43-44 (depending on how long you believe is sailing time between arcs and when their birthdays may fall between the time Zoro was dropped off at Sabaody and the summit at Mariejois took place. 

Let's pretend for a moment Mihawk really is a vampire. This means one of two things, either he died at 41 and is actually centuries old, or he became a vampire sometime in his 20s and is legit 44-45 years old. Either way, Mihawk comes off as extremely old fashioned in the way he talks, the way he dresses. I would say he, like Perona, is a gothic romantic. Romantics tend to put their other passions first in favor of actual romance, keeping this in mind this would indicate that like many handsome dark brooding autistic men before him (the good ol' Darcy type) he has put romance on the wayside because he wants a love that is real. This is not an uncommon romantic trope amongst gothic romantic and vampire lovers and generally stories with immortals. 

Often in fiction and romance novels the centuries old immortal is paired with a mortal (usually completely human) woman between 18-35. This type of romantic man has waited centuries for the right person they could form a lasting bond with and has not had much experience with actual love, if at all. For a few examples: ACATOR series Feyre and Rhys got together when Feyre was 20, and before that she was even younger with her first faerie boyfriend. In All Souls Trilogy Diana is suggested to be in her late 20s/early 30s and Matthew is pretty much old as dirt. In the Twilight Series Bella was 17 when she met Edward, who was 104.  These are a trope for a reason, and when done right it’s a pretty good trope. 

I'm going to include an incredibly unpopular opinion here, but "Goth Fam" is weird and here's why. While amusing in theory, portraying two grown adults and another grown adult as children and one adult is incredibly infantilizing. I won't disagree Zoro and Perona have a very close relationship where Perona especially is seen taking care of and is incredibly protective of him, I don't see where this necessarily makes them sibling coded (the same way I don't think Nami and Zoro are sibling coded). I won't get into that in more detail here about my thoughts on Zoro and Perona, but here's my hot take. 

Both Zoro and Perona are incredibly autistic coded, which makes drawing them drawn as children with Mihawk incredibly cringe. Mihawk did not know Zoro and Perona as anything but adults and does not get a right to claim either of them as his children unless they offer that up first. We never see either one of them directly call Mihawk a father figure. 

A 5’3, petite queen, the way Perona dresses and wears her hair is a fashion statement. I don't think she would like being portrayed as an actual child. Post-time skip she even has a tattoo on her arm the same place Nami’s tattoo is placed on her left arm, permanently branding herself and displaying her loyalty as a Thriller Bark Pirate. Perona does not need another father figure, she has not only Moria, but multiple other male figures in her life from her crew more rightful to the claim of being a parental figure than Mihawk does.

I think some people take the title ghost princess too seriously. Do not get it wrong, Perona is Moria's Ghost Princess and has been a pirate since she was presumably a child. Of course her epitaph is ghost princess. But if you see the way she is treated by Moria, he lets her run the place. There's signs of her everywhere, she shows up to his meeting like lol boring you woke me up for this? He lets her have a pick of whatever servant she wants and I'm pretty sure she has Thriller Bark’s master bedroom. She's like Regina George meets Usagi meets a pastel goth pirate. 

This also brings me to Mihawk calling Perona "musume". I think Mihawk calling her "gosuto musume", just like her epitaph, is taken too literally. In the modern context, this might mean daughter, but we've already established nothing about Mihawk is modern. One Piece itself is supposed to be 1500s if we're going to get super technical. 

Not only is Mihawk incredibly proper, but he's also a piece of shit. This is the same guy that called Zoro a little green froggy when they first met just to get a rise out of him. We only see him calling her this once, and this was presumably days after they met (a week or two tops). Immediately after she's called this, Perona yells at Mihawk not to give her orders. Contextually, this could be taken that he's giving her a backhanded compliment for appearing youthful, a lot like calling someone "auntie" might be taken as offense to the wrong person, which would indicate he's trying to get a rise out of her and it worked 

When they first meet, it does not go too well. Perona was already incredibly lonely to begin with before Zoro was dropped onto the island, she had taken care of his wounds for days on end and spent at least a week playing hide the swords so she had someone to keep her company. Meanwhile Mihawk is mildly irritated his quiet castle has uninvited guests and Perona's demands of him, his blasé attitude towards Zoro going out and trying to get himself killed has Perona deciding that he's heartless and she doesn't want to be alone with him.

Somewhere within two years, this changed. Not only does Perona go back to the island after seeing to it that Zoro didn't get lost trying to find his own damn ship, but when it's time to go we get a glimpse of what kind of life they've lived without Zoro around. If she couldn't stand him, that would have been the perfect time to go. 

Instead, we see that they have high respect for one another enough to take care of each other. To me, this bickering between them about what they did together isn't a conversation between a father and a daughter, it's a lover's quarrel. 

This is your typical “old married couple” banter. She’s saying "you never liked my father and you're ungrateful" and he's saying back that she's the ungrateful one because he's done more than enough for her in return to prove he does care.

I think Perona is trying to start a fight here, to protect her own heart so that she can leave on hostile terms and this bastard reels her right back in with just a few words. 

When Mihawk says this, there's a pause in the music from the silly arguing background, to this soft romantic beat, much like one might see in a romantic anime or drama when the couple are having a moment of intense feelings for one another.

Mihawk actually doesn't say much at all, but Perona knows his meaning immediately that if he didn't care for her in any way, he wouldn't have said anything at all.

Perona's personal style has changed a lot in the last two years. She no longer wears her hair in pigtails and appears in a younger style. If anything, it looks like her personal style is heavily influenced by Mihawk's in romantic black, whites and reds. She hung up her crown (presumably because she was under the impression Miria was very likely dead and he was the reason she was a proper princess). Her hat in particular is very much the female version of his, featuring white roses instead of a big fluffy feather. Red lining and all.

Hats in One Piece are so important, and I personally love the idea of him gifting her a hat to make her feel better about hanging up her crown (or because she was stealing his- one of my favorite headcanons).

[talkingbl]

Two Things Can Be True At Once: Prom, Phuwin, Yui & Mark (aka MSP + Phuwin)

I have a lot of thoughts about each of these scandals and reactions to them that I want to address. We'll go in order.

Prom: What Prom said was absolutely horrendous. I could not believe my ears and eyes and feel like he deserves every bit of criticism being tossed his way. He openly admitted to violating the human rights of CHILDREN, all for a weird cool-guy fantasy he wanted to portray for his damn near grown friends. That is maximum creep behavior and I hope he learns a powerful lesson from all of this. In spite of his apology, violating a child's right to privacy in those moments is way too much for me to feel comfortable with. Plus, the fact that he felt comfortable enough to say it on national TV until he got a little backlash speaks volumes to me.

Yui: Look, I'm not claiming to be in that woman's mind or know why she dismissed the reaction to Prom's disgusting statements--I only know that she has a job to do. For her to all but tell a much younger, more impressionable person that his dangerous words and actions were okay since it'll all blow over anyway was wrong and garbage can behavior. Being the adult in the situation, regardless of what her intent was, the effect is to become a pedo-apologist. She should have never told him his actions were okay, regardless of if she was just trying to talk him off a ledge or whatever. It is NEVER okay to do what Prom said he did--and it's completely fucked up that I even have to say that.

Phuwin: What Phuwin said was completely inappropriate and, unfortunately, a very common incidence even today. As someone who has ADHD, I can totally see why many are hurt by his words. Him using the r-word was indecent and deserved the criticism being lodged against him. And while I personally thought his apology was well-crafted, people have the right not to accept it. For me, I go on peoples' general feel in addition to their actions and words and Phuwin doesn't feel like this big bad monster to me. Again, totally up to other neurodivergents if they want to accept his apology.

Mark: This situation is a bit different than the others IMO, because I don't know the full context behind the most incriminating-sounding statement "it's normal." There is a very strong reason to believe Mark was stating "it's normal [to be stressed about this]" (since the sentence immediately preceding "it's normal" is about Prom being stressed). I want to be clear that I've not heard the full audio myself and every translation seems to attribute different words to Mark (but Yui's message stays consistent). Like, seriously, even Thai people don't even know what was said. For that reason, I am hard-pressed to feel the need to personally cancel Mark (but if you want to, that's your business). I think it would be misguided of me to feel the need to end this person because of something I barely understand myself. But this leads me into my next point when these scandals start piling up...

Folks on the internet do not live in the real world. For chronically-online young people, it takes not even a scintilla of evidence against someone to rip their entire livelihood away from them. Not only that, but these folks will hear a lie or exaggeration and RUN with it. They will hear that Mond, who was on the same Safe House season as Gemini, did Blackface (he did); Prom, who was on the same show as Gemini, spied on kids in the shower (he did); and Gemini colonized Namibia (he didn't) and will believe each allegation as if there's any truth to the last claim simply because Gem is associated with those two in some vague way. I'm not saying Gem is (or will turn out to be) an angel but the way some of these folks will just believe any characterization of things without looking at the evidence for themselves is dangerous.

I want to be clear. Calling Prom out is not dangerous to anyone. If anything, you're protecting more poor children from being spied on. However, running with lies, half-truths, or yet-to-be confirmed speculation is dangerous. I just wish more people would approach things logically instead of going on witch-hunts and calling anyone who exposes that tendency a "sympathizer" or "apologist".

That said, I want clean up the trash in our media (Build, apparently now Prom, etc.), but don't see the point in calling everything trash and taking it to the dump indiscriminately.

[loosescrewslefty]

Can I just say that I'm not only grateful for the fact that Lilith IS Aspec, but for how the crew and Cissy Jones handled that revelation in Lilith's letter?

While we know that the Boiling Isles are free of sexual and gender-identity related discrimination, there is still a unique problem of asexuality in an allo world where you feel like you just don't fit in. Gwendolyn and Lilith's friends and coworkers are all super invested in her supposed romance, and don't understand why she wouldn't take interest in something like that. Them pushing her to put herself out there or accept romantic advances made at her comes from a place of love- they want her to be happy and feel loved and cherished- but it also makes Lilith uncomfortable because the relationships that they're encouraging her to partake in are not what SHE wants for herself, or something she's ever taken an interest in. She knows that they don't mean anything malicious on their actions, but it still puts Lilith in a position where she's confused and upset and feels like she's different than those around her, and that is so relatable to the experience of being asexual. Constantly having to defend yourself and try to convinced worried loved ones that you are happy and fulfilled with your family/friends/career and don't want or need a romantic relationship, and them not understanding of just thinking that you haven't met the right person yet and one day a magical someone will come and light a fire in your soul.

I also really appreciate that Lilith is an ADULT going through this. I remember I started questioning my sexuality when I was in my early twenties, because that was about the time it finally sank in that even though other men and women expressed interest in me romantically or sexually, I just wasn't comfortable with that and didn't want that sort of relationship from anybody. It was pure happenstance that I stumbled upon an art meme talking about asexuality- a term I hadn't heard of before that point- and googled it out of both idle curiosity and a desire to further educate myself. And I nearly cried as I fell down the rabbit hole of that reading because finally, FINALLY I understood why I was different from everyone around me. I had a word for what made me the way I was, and there were others that were like me as well, so I wasn't alone anymore.

For Lilith, I'm willing to bet that her fixation on Eda's curse and fixing her mistake and responsibilities as the head of the Emperor's Coven kept her from thinking too long or too hard about her own sexuality. But now that both issues are off the table and she's more focused on herself and her issues, it's finally at the forefront of her mind and it's bothering her. And I appreciate that. I appreciate that Lilith is a grown woman going through this, who know how the world works and sees how other people's relationships blossom and realizes that that's not something she wants or needs in her life. I appreciate that Lilith is never portrayed as emotionless or less human. She's clearly a loving and affectionate witch, but romantic love just isn't something she has any sort of interest in. For her, familial bonds and platonic relationships are the relationships that matter, and she just isn't interested in becoming romantically entangled with anyone.

As an adult asexual, this is the sort of representation I desperately wish I had gotten when I was younger. It could have helped me figure myself out sooner, and saved me from years of feeling like I was broken and wondering what was wrong with me because I was different from everyone else. But I am so grateful to the Owl House crew for giving this to the children growing up with this show, and potentially saving them from that pain and self-loathing.

I am so, SO grateful for Lilith Clawthorne being a canonical Aspec character in a children's show.

[fantastic-nonsense]

@wahbegan: why do you hate Jason/Babs so much? I mean tbh Three Jokers was the only time i'd ever seen it in any capacity [x]

This required an answer that was longer than the replies would let me give, and forgive me if it comes off as a bit snippy, but basically: it's a ship that is directly an outgrowth of comic creators being misogynistic and shopping Barbara around to every male Batfamily member in her radius because DC refused to allow her the same consideration in her romantic relationships that they gave for the male Bats and refused to allow more than one woman to exist within the Batfam. It's gross and the reason it exists is blatantly sexist.

Jason/Babs is a relationship that is entirely predicated on "giving Jason a love interest" rather than respecting Barbara as an individual character outside of her potential to be paired with whichever Batboy the writers like best that week. It's a situation where she was considered an empty vessel to be paired with whoever was convenient because she was the only major female Bat character allowed to exist during the New 52 era (besides Kate Kane, who's explicitly lesbian and was therefore Not An Option).

The decision to tease them as a potential couple happened during a period of time when DC was quite literally passing Babs around between the male Batfam members. In various pieces of comics and non-comics media over a three year period, she flirted with/dated Dick, Jason Todd, Luke Fox, Jason Bard, Ethan Cobblepot, Tim (in the Arkham games), and Bruce (in Bruce Timm's DCAU-adjacent Killing Joke movie). This is despite Babs usually being DECADES older than Jason and Tim and DC's dramatic de-aging of her during the New 52 being the only reason she was even remotely within an acceptable age range to potentially date Jason in the first place.

Writers largely did not give Babs equal treatment in any of these relationships, even the ones portrayed within her own book (Dick, Luke, Jason Bard, and Ethan). She was either a reward to be handed to whichever Batboy a writer wanted to do a love plot with, a way to create "shared angst and bonding potential" so the writer could focus on a male Bat's trauma, or subject to a carousel of dating subplots that had very little to do with her actual desires or character development. Writers just wanted to pair her with someone, so they grabbed the nearest available Bat-adjacent character whether it made any sense for Babs or not.

Barbara is traditionally over a decade older than Jason (since she's 4-6 years older than Dick depending on the retcon and Jason is 6-ish years younger than Dick); she, as a grown adult and full-time librarian, canonically tutored Jason before his death when he was 15. The fact that she was ever considered a viable love interest for Jason in the first place has its roots in the misogynistic de-aging of Babs in the reboot and the stupid-ass nonsense DC was perpetuating at the time about giving Jason all of Dick's old friends and teammates and love interests to hang around with. It was transposing Dick onto Jason in an attempt to do something interesting narratively with Jason rather than actually caring about Barbara as a character in literally any capacity. It's also not a relationship that makes sense in any way other than "ooooooh we need to give Jason a girlfriend who understands his ~trauma~. Let's pair him up with the other Bat who's been fucked over by the Joker!" Disregarding...you know, the myriad reasons why that's a shitty basis for a romantic relationship.

tl;dr: editorial and writer misogyny via using Babs as a shipping bicycle and reward for whichever male Batboy editorial likes best this week is bad, actually. Therefore, I hate Jason/Babs even conceptually because it does not consider what Barbara might want or need out of a relationship nor is it a relationship that was ever about her; it was strictly about what might be "cool" or "interesting" within the concept of Jason's story and the result of various writers trying to do something with Jason and make him interesting by giving him a potential girlfriend who "understood his trauma." Thankfully, it never truly manifested in any way other than flirting and some insinuations (except in Three Jokers, the original book under discussion), but we will all be better off when even the concept is dead and buried.

[writingwithcolor]

Black, divorced, formerly teen parents, Black lgbt+ with white partners

tiredandtears asked:

Hi, I am currently working on a story about a single black mother who left her son’s father (who is also black) on amicable terms a couple years before the story’s beginning.  The mother is the main parenting figure in the son’s life, but she keeps in contact with the father who lives in the next town or two over and visits often.  They’re friendly with each other and co-parent as best they can.

Something that I am worried about is that when I started outlining the story, I wrote that they had their son a year or so after graduating high school, so they both started working to support their son.  I’m nervous that this might relate to a stereotype that black people have unplanned children as older teens/young adults.  (I’m not sure if that is a common stereotype, but I have heard it voiced in the past.)

Another thing I’m a little nervous about is that as the mother works, she starts to fall for one of her coworkers (a white bisexual woman).  I’m scared that this could play into the somewhat common occurrence that black LGBTQ+ characters only seem to appear when they have a white partner, and I don’t want to add to that if it is indeed an issue.

Teen Black parents

There is indeed a stereotype that young Black people are mothers / parents. There’s a lot more to this, but part of the matter comes from the adultification of Black children, especially girls in this case. There’s also this insistence, within and outside the community, that Black girls are “fast” or “act grown.” This hypersexualizes Black minors. I’ve heard many stories of a young Black girl being somewhere with their baby sibling / cousin / any young child and having strangers assume she is the parent, even when they’re children or teenagers themselves. It’s absolutely happened to me when I was younger, too. 

Based on birth rate statistics from the CDC, there are reportedly more BIPOC teen parents than white ones in the USA. At the same time, teen birth rates have also decreased in recent years (at the time of this post). But it’s not about whether Black teen parents exist, as teen parents exist in all races. More than white does not mean that every young Black girl / person should be assumed to be a teen parent.

Consider that:

There’s nothing wrong with people who may “fit” stereotypes. I’ve talked about this extensively here. They’re people too, even if society places a stigma or judgment of them. 

There is usually nuance to any “stereotype”, such as in discrepancies in access to proper birth control or bc education, underreported data, etc. And on that note

Check your intentions as well as your logic in writing on these topics. Are you the right voice? How far are you exploring the depths of the issue? You’ll need to be well-researched when making commentary on any matter, especially from an outside perspective. 

Depicting Black teen parents may not be well received by Black readers. And it’s well within their rights to be uncomfortable. You could avoid the matter completely by making them fairly young parents, but not teenagers.

Long story short; if you’re going to write Black teen parents, portray these parents respectfully without demonizing their actions. They sound like responsible and good parents, and likely have a support group to help them be that way. If you wanted, you could add in a white friend or two that were also teen parents. Still, some people will not be fans of someone outside of the group writing on this. And question what their intentions are.

~Mod Colette

Black lgbtqia+ with white partner

Well. interracial lbtqia+ couples absolutely exist! But since you’re worried, and I do think it’s lacking in media, it would absolutely help to add in Black lgbtqia+ representation.

~Mod Colette

Queer representation of exclusively Black couples is rare. Why can’t the new love interest also be Black, too?

-Mod Norma

It seems to me that representation in romance, especially for queer romance is either white or with one white love interest. Rarely does it not involve at least one white love interest. It would be refreshing to have her have a Black love interest especially. It would be very welcome.

~Mod Alice

[masterthespianduchovny]

Let’s take age off the table, I know shocker for me, the other thing that bothers me about this development isn’t that it can’t develop into something serious without major sacrifices happening if they stay together.

And that doesn’t it right with me.

Society loves romanticizing that “if it’s true love, a sacrifice doesn’t feel like a sacrifice.”

Girls are especially conditioned with this belief. On average, girls and women give up far more for love and a relationship and a significant amount gross to resent this in some capacity. They have to tell themselves that their relationships and kids made the sacrifice all worth it. And can’t express regret at the road not taken.

It’s why the saying, “you can’t have it all” is mainly directed at women and almost never men. Because, in comparison to women, men tend to have it all. Men are less likely to give up careers or take a step back in the name of love. And, when they do, they typically have more opportunities for them than women.

And the same goes for people of color. Their is rampant racism and hiring discrimination, so Black people have to move more carefully professionally.

Which brings up to the Sam and Rebecca storyline.

Both of them love and are invested in their careers. Their relationship jeopardizes either or one both of their professional goals and desires.

The idea that they can and will get over this because “love” is so dangerous because this relationship had massive red flags and was problematic from the word go and they both knew and know that. It’s not like they dated without personal attachment, and then a professional opportunity presented itself.

No, they voluntarily entered into a relationship that can only end in disaster.

If they stayed together and went public, there is no way in hell Sam could stay on the team.

Which means Sam would be the first one to take a professional hit. Sure he could go to a new team, but we wouldn’t know where that would be, if he would have to be traded/loaned, and if where he went would even be beneficial for him as a player. There is also his rejection taking a hit, because even tho they will pat him on the ass, his professional cred will have taken a massive hit.

And, for real, what owners do you think will be okay with a professional player having that kind of access and intimacy with another owner?

Sam’s professional development would also take a hit. Remember how Sam was struggling with Richmond at first, until Ted problem solved why that was? Remember how his stats was taking a hit? Remember how ted constantly advocated for Sam as a player and utilized him in a way that was appropriate for him and, in turn, his confidence not only returned and flourished under Ted.

And we saw how Jamie reacted when his loan was terminated. We saw the difference of play and what it did for his confidence training under ted v not.

I’m not saying Sam needs ted and can’t succeed without him, however, coaching arent a one size for all. Some coaches work better for some than they do for others. Some players need certain types of coaches and only respond to one specific coach.

Sam’s development is threatened by not only losing a coach, but having to play for a new team, learn a new system, and make bonds with new players. It may not seem like it, but switching teams, esp when don’t want to, is hard on players.

Sam would be voluntarily setting back his career to be with Rebecca, which may harm him in the long run.

With Rebecca, most have noted that she’s been treated like shit in the media and, in this case, it would be rightfully so. We shouldn’t be arguing that just because Rupert’s gets a pass, Rebecca should too. We should be arguing that Rupert needs to be criticized just as much if not more for what he did. Professionally speaking, Rebecca actually deserves far more criticism than Rupert. He just ran a mediocre club, she’s unintentionally undermining it by dating a player, which reeks of massive irresponsibility on her end.

Some have argued that since Sam and Rebecca have great chemistry and this could be something great, maybe Rebecca should sell her club.

Fucking, excuse me?

Regardless of how Rebecca originally felt towards the club, she has grown to love it and has a deep attachment. She even takes genuine pride at her ownership and trying to get them to succeed.

Some are really saying that a woman should sell her club to be with a man she shouldn’t have gotten involved with to begin with? Like, I’m hearing that correctly??? (Yes, this has been said.)

So in a profession where women rarely own clubs and a professional she enjoys, is a because she should give up for love?

And if this relationship doesn’t work out, which it most likely won’t, them making these massive sacrifices won’t be “no big deal, I’m glad I took the risk.”

It would be, “what was I thinking selling my club/fucking over my career?”

Rebecca’s media problem wouldn’t go away with her selling the club, she’d still be dating a footballer and mags would still write about her. This is a fucking juicy story. It would take years before this wouldn’t be in constant rotation. Even if they both went away, this story wouldn’t die and would hang over AFC Richmond like a dark cloud.

Love isn’t going to make Rebecca stop caring about what the media says about her, esp if they’re right in their criticisms this time around. That criticism practically ate her alive. She’s going to feel like the monster she thought she was in season 1.

Especially since this is going to be way worse and more frequent.

And do you imagine that she keeps her relationship with Keeley or Higgins? Do you think she doesn’t become a pariah?

So a woman who already went through a humiliating and public divorce, then gets into a relationship that increases attacks and criticisms on her ten fold, and she sells her club to be with this dude (hypothetically, of course), do y’all think Rebecca doesn’t feel even more isolated and lonely? Do y’all think that Sam’s love is enough to compensate the massive loses she’s taken? That nothing else matters because she has him?

Some want to pretend like it’s no big deal, but either they don’t understand the implications or they think just because it’s fiction it doesn’t matter, but it does. It does matter what they’re saying and what they’re not saying. Because if it’s fiction and doesn’t matter, why complain about how raze is being portrayed as well as gender?

Age can’t be treated as unimportant because it’s a fictional pairing, yet racism and sexism doesn’t. That’s called inconsistency and cognitive dissonance. Either all of these things matter or none of them do and, yes, in this case it is all or nothing.

I’ve explained enough why this age difference matters and to pretend it means nothing because “he’s an adult.” Like man, young adults are truly fucked if older people feel this way. If older people feel their responsibility and obligation for protecting younger people stops at 18.

And, perhaps, this explains why people don’t understand the other complexities and nuances of what this relationship is fucked up. Or why they’re downplaying it.

As someone once said, “all art is political.” This and these discussions are a politic of sorts and so many people are missing the mark, yet are only advocating and having nuances discussions on this topic advocate for a problematic and detrimental relationship.

[harry-hollands]

selcouth // harry holland // 3

chapter 3: before and after the shadows

story summary: Harry was used to living in his brothers’ shadows. Tom was the actor and Sam was the cook and musician. He was used to being second best and genuinely gave up on finding someone who could love him for him. Someone who could believe that Harry wasn’t second best. His mindset changes however, when he meets you. The sunshine to cast away all of his shadows.

chapter summary: an insight into why harry has shadows, and why they seem to consume him at a certain time of the year.

pairing(s): harry holland x reader, past!harry holland x toxic!oc, implied tuwaine barret x broadway!oc, and implied paddy holland x oc

warnings: angsty harry, depressed harry, fluffy, and angsty

word count: 2.2k

A few months into meeting Y/N, Harry had found himself waiting for her after her rehearsals frequently. Sophia and Sicily teased the both of them incessantly, but expressed their happiness for the two of them, despite the common “We’re just friends!” response.

Sam and Paddy were probably the happiest for their friends. Harry’s twin and youngest brother had never seen the curly photographer so content like he was with Y/N. Wherever one was, the other was not far behind. 

Harrison liked Y/N but was still wary of the girl. Of course, if she was friends with his girlfriend, he could only imagine that Y/N was probably a genuine person. However, because of not only his status but his best mate’s, there was still some hesitancy about her. It was understandable, but Sora and Haz had gotten into a small argument about it, Sora feeling that he inadvertently doubted her judgment.

The three that were the most apprehensive about Harry spending a lot of time with Y/N was Tom, Nadia, and Tuwaine. Nadia liked her but feared that she was just using Harry to get clout, while Tom and Tuwaine knew that it had happened before in his last relationship.

When Harry had announced to his family and friends that he was in a relationship, everyone was ecstatic for the younger twin. The woman at the time was not very well known but had been friends with his family for some time. Their relationship had lasted a little over a year, but ended messily, with Harry calling it quits after some information had come to light. 

It was discovered that the woman Harry had been seeing had only been using the poor photographer for fame. Tom, who was single at the time, had been extremely confused when the woman had attempted to make moves on him while they were all out at the bar for the night. 

Tom had dismissed that night as an accidental drunken mistake, but immediately took that thought back as the next morning, Harry’s girlfriend had winked at him while grabbing a cup of tea. The poor actor felt the need to inform his little brother of what had happened, and when he ended up telling him minutes later, Tom was shocked to find that Harry didn’t seem fazed. 

All Harry did was nod sadly and shrug, actions that alarmed the older Brit. When Tom asked what he had meant by the smile and shrug, Harry burst into tears, something he rarely ever did. Tuwaine, who had entered to ask what the two wanted to eat for breakfast, was taken aback by his roommate’s actions.

In all the years that he had known the Hollands, not once had he ever seen Harry genuinely cry. Tuwaine, being the sweet guy that he is, walked over to where Harry was standing by the closet and gave him a tight hug. 

After tight hugs from his brother and best friend, Harry explained to the two that this wasn’t the first time She Who Shall Not Be Named flirted with others. At the very beginning of their relationship, she had made unwanted advances towards Sam but had dismissed it as a joke. Harry admitted again that Harrison had told him that she even tried making advances towards him, knowing full well that he was talking to Sora. 

Sora and Harry’s ex didn’t get along. Sora had thought that She Who Shall Not Be Named was a bitch, and only cared for money and a public image. Harry’s ex thought that Sora was too blunt, a know-it-all, and a dumb foreigner, which is the only remote way to describe the words she had called the American.

Two days after Tom’s confession, Harry had finally worked up the courage to break up with the woman. Long story short, there was a lot of screaming from She Who Shall Not Be Named after Harry had broken the news, and had kindly asked her to leave.

Harry was a mess, but for the first time since he had entered the relationship, he felt free. However, it had practically taken an army to ensure that Harry was genuinely ok. The first few months had been rough, mostly since all he wanted to do was drink beer, eat tub after tub of mint-chocolate-chip ice cream, and blast Little Mix’s song Shout Out to My Ex.

While Harry had healed and grew as a person, Tom and Tuwaine still lingered on the situation. They were the only ones to know that Harry had cried, and both knew that they never wanted to see that sight again. If it were Tom or Tuwaine’s way, the two wouldn’t let Harry date until he was at least fifty-years-old, but also, Harry was his own person, and he was an adult who was capable of making decisions.

Y/N had a clue of what had happened from Sora, but the latter declined to go into detail as one, it wasn’t her information to tell, and two, Sora would get so upset at the whole situation that a coherent sentence could not be formed. 

One particularly bitter February day, before the twins’ birthday, Harry finally worked up the courage to tell Y/N the full details. In the past few weeks, Harry had been distant, which caused a small rift to form between the twitterpated pair. 

Harry realized that he was often unhappy and the only way he knew to cure the shadows surrounding the poor man, was his fix of sunshine. Y/N had grown concerned when Harry didn’t show up after her rehearsals four consecutive days in a row. 

Y/N had asked Sora who was more often than not staying with Harrison, what was going on with Harry, but even she didn’t know what was going on, and she lived with him! Y/N had even worked up the courage to ask Sam, Harrison, and even Tom if Harry was ok, but all three declined to answer.

As soon as Y/N saw Harry waiting outside, there was no hesitation in the massive hug she pulled him into. Sophia was squealing internally watching the whole scene unfold, while Sicily scoffed, partly because she was done with being single, but also because she had seen the poor girl worry over the boy who she, personally, did not think was worthy of being fretted over.

Harry, who was caught by surprise about Y/N’s actions, hesitantly hugged her back. He had honestly been acting like a dick halfway through January, until now, the beginning of February, and here his sunshine was, hugging him like nothing ever happened.

“How have you been, ghost?” Y/N teased with a warm smile.

Harry, again taken aback by her actions, immediately pulled the girl into another hug. “I am so fucking sorry for ghosting you Sunshine. I have a reason why I’ve been acting so distant, but I completely understand if you think it’s just a fucking excuse and that I’m just another fucking div playing with your heart, but I promise you that I’m just a div, and I’m not playing with you.”

Y/N chuckled and gently pulled away from Harry’s chest, but still kept her hands on his waist in a comforting way. Her warm smile was instantly replaced with a frown when she noticed the stream of tears running down Harry’s face.

“Hey, love, what’s going on? What’re you crying for? You’ve done nothing wrong?”

“But I have! I’ve been completely ghosting you for like three weeks, and I’ve barely been visiting you after rehearsals, and when I do-”

“Hey. You’re going through something right now. It’s up to you when you feel comfortable letting me know what’s going on.”

“But I-”

“Harry, I promise you, everything is ok. I’m not mad at you. Never was. I was just extremely worried about you. Although, according to my stage manager, I’ve been portraying Eliza a lot better the past few weeks. So maybe you should worry me more. I’m kidding, don’t actually do that to me again, Sophia, Aiyana, and Sicily were exhausted over my constant worrying.”

Harry laughed and pulled her into another hug. “Ya think we can go be by ourselves for a while? You deserve an explanation on why I’ve been a dick.”

Y/N smiled and nodded, taking Harry’s hand and letting him lead the way to his parked car. Harry helped the girl put her belongings inside the boot, before helping her into the passenger side of the car, and then hopping into the driver’s side.

Sophia smirked at Sicily, holding out her hand expectantly, with Sicily groaning as she pulled out a wadded twenty-pound bill. “Fuck you, Soph.” Sicily groaned again.

Harry found parking in a car garage and the pair made their way through groups of tourists, before arriving at a view of the lit-up London Eye. The two of them stared out in silence before Harry launched into his explanation.

Throughout his story, Y/N’s face progressively morphed into disgust, as she listened to the full story of She Who Shall Not Be Named. Even though the woman was no longer in Harry’s life, Y/N felt a subconscious need to beat her up.

How could someone be so cruel that you use someone for fame? Y/N couldn’t understand, and all she could do was pull Harry into a hug after tears began pricking the corners of his eyes. 

“Thank you for trusting me enough for telling me why you’ve been so distant.”

Harry without any hesitance, hugged the younger woman back, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, and closed his eyes. “Thank you for not immediately getting angry at me for being a dick.”

Y/N giggled and pulled away. “C’mon, we better head back. I don’t need Tom and Sora calling the police on us because we’ve been missing for two hours.”

Harry chuckled before pressing another kiss to her head and pulling her with him back to the car.

As soon as the pair had arrived at the Holland-Osterfield-Barret-Parkes-and now probably Tanaka residence, Sora, and Y/N’s other best friend, Aiyana, immediately pulled the Broadway actress into a bone mushing hug. 

“Where the fucking hell have you been?” Sora practically shrieked in Y/N’s ear.

“Sora is just overreacting, but seriously I was getting worried about you, lolo.” 

Y/N chuckled before glancing at Harry who was getting hit upside the head by all of the boys. “We talked. We’re ok now.”

Sora and Aiyana shared a knowing look before pulling Y/N, and Harry inside the house to warm up. They were glad that the two had made up because even if Tom and Tuwaine didn’t want to admit it, everyone residing in the house knew that they had missed how much brighter their lives were around the girl.

About a week later, which was Valentine’s Day week, everyone was in a bustle to get everything together. Tuwaine was bringing up his courage to ask out Sicily, who finally, wasn’t introduced by Paddy, but by Sora, Paddy was shooting his shot with Aiyana who everyone knew shared the same feelings, and the two were lowkey hooking up. (They were not slick at all. Even Y/N and Harry were slicker about their secret feelings for one another...and that’s saying a ton.) 

Tom, Harrison, and Elysia were both coordinating with Y/N to get tickets to her opening night, which coincidentally was Valentine’s Day (Secretly, Y/N had already gotten tickets for everyone to attend), Sam was working with Y/N on a rendition of “Can’t Help Falling In Love” for Elysia, Nadia was buying any Spider-Man related thing she could find at a reasonable price, while Sora was secretly stashing her favorite Hawaiian snacks, and items sent to her by her family back home in her shared apartment with Y/N and Aiyana.

Harry didn’t have anything extravagant planned. All he was going to do was attend Hamilton, give her a bouquet of sunflowers, and a sun necklace, earring, bracelet, and ring set he got for a good deal off of Pandora. 

Y/N had taken a different route. She knew that the two weren’t ready to date, seeming as they had only met months before, and the two had both agreed that with their next relationships they had to at least have known each other a year. However, that didn’t mean Y/N wasn’t going to do something special for her beloved curly-haired photographer.

At the end of the show, Y/N was planning on singing one of his favorite songs, and afterward, hand him half of a Yin-Yang necklace she was planning on sharing with him and polaroids of the two of them.

On one of her days-off from rehearsals, Y/N, accompanied by Sora, ventured to downtown London. The Broadway actress was looking through shops, searching and scanning for the best quality Yin-Yang necklace she could find, while Sora was doing some window shopping. Y/N was also looking to find a rustic-looking photo album/scrapbook to place her polaroids in. As the best friends entered a quaint little shop selling some photo albums matching the aesthetic Y/N was going for, Sora’s eyes widened as she caught sight of the one person she never wanted to see again, and the person she never wanted Y/N to meet, standing at the register waiting for everything of hers to be wrung up; She Who Must Not Be Named, or Eira Williams, Harry’s ex-girlfriend.

~~~~~~~~

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[thejustmaiden]

I'm not against SessRin as the ship itself, rather I'm against the idea of it being canon. I wouldn't even care if InuYasha was of a more mature genre. Yes, the trope is very popular even in hentai, yaoi and yuri. However, all of these genres are explicitly for adults - the type of audience that are well capable of seperating between fiction and real life, knowing what's wrong and right. Yasahime's still cleary targeted at a younger audience - kids that can still be easily affected by fiction.

Hey, nonnie! I really appreciate the ask. Apologies for the slight delay. 😊

I read what you had to say, and I think you bring up a very valid point that I don't see being discussed enough quite honestly.

Because you're right, Inuyasha is geared towards a younger audience. That explains why it was the very first anime for many of us growing up.

Ironically enough, some of you who like me stayed up late to catch it on TV remember that Inuyasha came out on a network called "Adult Swim" of all things. haha (I gather that had more to do with the occasional foul language than anything else.) Cartoon Network- what Adult Swim is known as during the daytime- shows children's programs and Inuyasha wouldn't have been exactly appropriate on there either.

Now let's take a quick look at the other anime shows I remember that would come out on the line-up along with Inuyasha. Cowboy Bepop and Ghost in the Shell are the first two that come to memory. If you aren't familiar with those, readers, I encourage you to look them up and see how they're described in comparison to Inuyasha. They both tackle some pretty dark and heavy adult themes. Inuyasha, on the other hand, is based off a shonen manga aimed at young teens, boys specifically.

I'm not personally familiar with the yaoi and yuri genres myself, but from what I do know, a lot of their stories center around sexual romance and homoeroticism. Inuyasha may include some romance, but by no means does the author insert explicitly sexual elements into her story. Fans who are mature to handle that kind of content can if they so choose to-- bring on the fan fiction and fan art! But can the series itself be justified in doing so? Well, I hope not since the average Inuyasha viewer is only just a teenager.

You're correct, fiction is capable of influencing and shaping how some kids learn to view and make sense of certain events. I'm going to give you a real life example here. Keep in mind, readers, that this is an extreme case that obviously wouldn't apply to everyone or every situation. The purpose of recounting this tale is to demonstrate that young minds are more vulnerable to the influences around them, be them real or imagined.

Years ago there used to be this internet urban legend called "The Slender Man." In 2014, these two 12-year old girls (so roughly the same age many of us started watching Inuyasha) became obsessed with this fictional character and wanted to prove to everyone he existed. In order to do that, they made up their minds to kill one of their classmates to please him. They ended up stabbing the victim numerous times, but she somehow miraculously survived. The two girls who were found guilty of this crime ended up being admitted into mental health institutions. Please feel free to read up more on this yourself. It sounds creepy, I know, but how the community came together to support the victim and her recovery was a touching ending to such a horrific story.

Like I already mentioned, this was an extreme case that almost resulted in murder. Death, however, isn't the only bad outcome that can occur. Child abuse in all its complex forms is a serious outcome, too. It should go without saying that no child watching Inuyasha should accept the idea of a young girl (like themselves but maybe younger) being pursued later once she's "old enough" by the same male authority figure who was her main protector during their travels. You could tell Rin felt legitimately safe and happy for the first time in a long time while in his company. I also like to wonder if that's because Sesshomaru reminded her of someone she knew before her family was killed. But who really knows? After all, kids are very trusting by nature. Let's be honest, the happy-go-lucky Rin would've followed just about anyone who saved her! It just happened to be Sesshomaru, which of course I'm grateful for. So tell me again, why does this protector-ward dynamic they've got going on need to turn romantic?

Seriously, why are viewers expecting a romance to happen anyway? It's not like we have been given any solid indication to suggest that these two are destined for it. Allow me to explain why I believe that is. Sessrin fans anticipate a romance in their future despite the lack of foreshadowing, because this trope IS popular. (But only in series geared towards adults- like you said, nonnie.) In other words, it's been so engrained in our minds that it's a completely normal direction we should come to expect a relationship between an older man and a young girl/woman to take. So even though it hasn't been hinted at much if at all, it's apparently bound to happen regardless.

A young woman who decides to be with an older man isn't the issue here, BUT there's a fine line and at times the stories we tell will tread that line and test its boundaries. Case in point: shipping Sesshomaru with "Adult Rin" although we've only met and gotten to know her as a young girl up until now. In many instances, adult!Rin supposedly only has to mean she's old enough to bear children. If it was the norm for a girl to have kids at 15 or 16 in Feudal Japan, then that must mean we should not only tolerate it but celebrate it too, right?

Yes, fiction is a creative outlet to explore and push the boundaries from time to time, but we must be careful of what messages we're sending and who the target audience is. Would it really be wise to portray in a positive light a teenage girl getting pregnant with one of the people who helped raised her's babies on a show for teens? That's not my idea of a wholesome family lesson I'd ever want to teach my kids or have them learn elsewhere.

What we're essentially doing is telling the young Inuyasha viewers that it's totally normal to sexualize and romanticize a young girl's future without her say. That it's okay to speak for her and decide that's what her character would want even if we haven't met this adult version of her yet. What about Rin's hopes and dreams? How about we wait to see how she is as a grown-up first before we come to such big conclusions. Wouldn't you say you're jumping the gun a bit, shippers?

Nobody is saying you can't picture it, alright, but to claim it's the only obvious progression- because evidently there must be one for some reason?- of the relationship Rin's formed with Sesshomaru is absolutely absurd. If that's the case, then basically all the other "who's Sesshomaru's baby mama" theories are just as plausible as yours if not more so.

Also, guys, we really ought to stop stating that Sesshomaru will never have the capacity to care for another human being besides Rin like it's a fact. I'm aware that to many the appeal of this ship is that she was the first one to break through that icy exterior of his, so that must translate to a love that transcends and what not. If she wasn't a child he guarded like his own first and foremost, then this ship could have potential. That's not the case though, so moving right along!

Right, so who says his affection towards humans has to stop at Rin? Why can't the mom- if there is a mom- be some new character? That's really not reaching- yes, even for Sesshomaru. Knowing Rin, she's probably the one who introduced them! Plus, it's not like we don't have other canon sources that already show us Sesshomaru coming to the aid of humans. He has saved and protected Kagome on a few occasions that we know of so far, as well as Kohaku. And no, he didn't just protect him because Rin asked him to. Perhaps that was why he did at first, but please give Sesshomaru credit where credit is due. He is not the cold heartless demon we once believed him to be. How else do you think he is capable of activating Tenseiga's powers? Yeah, no, Sesshomaru grew to care for that kid, and Kokahu wouldn't have stuck around him for as long as he did if he didn't believe Sesshomaru didn't have his best interests at heart. Well, in Sesshomaru's own special little way that is. 😆

I got a little sidetracked- my bad! I suppose it's all relevant when you think about it. Alrighty, nonnie, I hope I adressed your ask the way you wanted. Please feel free to drop by again! 🖖

Reminder: Do not plan to engage in discourse on this blog if you are going to be disrespectful. The views I'm expressing aren't "an attack," so there's no need to get defensive and aggressive. I've even had a few Sessrin shippers themselves tell me I make valid points and that I do it in an upright manner. So if you don't believe me, then maybe you'll believe them. Thank you!

[behindheremeraldeyes]

sasusaku month 2018 days 9 + 30- written in the stars/ expectation

title: Mother Knows Best

summary: Modern AU— Sasuke is coming home for a visit after 2 months, and this time, he's bringing his girlfriend with him so he can introduce her to his family. Mikoto is really nervous as she waits for them to arrive, not knowing what to think about a girl who might not be the one she chose for him.

a/n: Okay, this one took me forever because of all my tests and because of all the ideas that kept popping in my head, but… It's finally here. It's a long one and it's also the first time I wrote something with Mikoto as a main character. I'm not sure if I've portrayed her correctly, but… that's what I have for you today. I hope you all enjoy it, and please, tell me what you think!

.

.

.

The table was set, the food was in the oven, and even if she had already made sure everything was ready, Uchiha Mikoto was double-checking all the things she had already checked at least four times during the past five minutes.

She was wearing the proper dress, with the proper shoes and proper stockings that gave out the perfect, welcoming aura; and her makeup was on point for what was supposed to be a festive occasion. The house was clean, both her husband and her eldest son were properly dressed, and yet, her racing heart was telling her there was something really important out of place. And unfortunately, she knew exactly what it was.

On that afternoon, unlike all the others, Mikoto was growing more anxious with every, passing second; and the reason behind that was no other than her youngest son. After long and busy four months, Sasuke was finally coming home for a visit. After so long and after acing his tests in college, his schedule would finally allow him to return home for a couple of days to see his family, and even if she was thrilled to see her son, the Uchiha mother was also incredibly nervous for he had announced that, this time, he would not be coming home alone.

For the first time in his life, Sasuke was bringing his girlfriend home to meet his family, and if anything, Mikoto didn't know how to react to that.

Yes. The time had finally come. A time feared by every mother, when their youngest, baby boy decides to introduce the one girl that will take him away. She was about to meet the one her son chose to share his life with, and the one that would, eventually, be a part of their family. An outsider— a stranger— was about to join them, and there was nothing she could do about it.

Whether she was too tall, too short or even too shy, it was not up to her judge her son's girlfriend.

This time, it was his call. His choice. And no matter what, she would have to respect that.

Sigh. If only he had listened to his mother when he was younger.

If only his girlfriend was—

" Mom." Her eldest spoke, bringing her back from her spiralling thoughts. Her dark eyes turned to him as he approached her on the kitchen, his cell-phone in his hands. " They're almost here. Sasuke said 15 more minutes."

" Aah… Okay, Itachi." Mikoto said, her voice low as she tried to sound as normal and as relaxed as possible. If he didn't know her better, Itachi might have even fallen for that facade.

" Are you okay, mom?"

" O-Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?"

" Well, I ask you the same thing." He smiled, crossing his arms across his chest. " Your favorite son is coming home after so long… I thought you would be more excited about it."

" Don't be silly, Itachi. Of course I'm excited to see your brother." She sighed, placing both of her hands on the kitchen island. " It's just that… I don't know… His girlfriend…"

" Are you really jealous, mom?" He teased, that silly Uchiha smirk growing on his lips. " Are you worried a sinful woman will steal your baby away?"

" Oi! Stop making fun of your mother!" Her dark orbs glared at her son, a pout making its way to her face. " This is ridiculous. Sure, I am a little jealous, but it's not that. It's her, you know… We don't know even know her name, Itachi! What food does she like? Is she allergic to something I've prepared? Where is she even gonna sleep?!"

" It's the 21st century, mom. She will sleep with Sasuke, of course."

" 21st century?! We are a traditional family, Itachi!" She said, earning a giggle from her son." But that's not the real point... " She sighed. " How are we supposed to like her and welcome her into our family? And how is she supposed to do the same? This kind of stuff doesn't happen during one dinner!"

" oh, wait a second… Are you really worried she might not like us? Come on, mom… She's dating Sasuke… Her standards can't be that high."

" Tch. That's not the problem, Itachi…" She sighed defeatedly at his words, knowing very well that the possibility of not being liked by her son's girlfriend didn't even cross her mind. Even if he was really trying to make her feel better, Itachi wasn't really helping at that moment. Though, it wasn't his fault, since she herself wasn't sure how anyone could help her feel better regarding how she felt towards her son's girlfriend. Those were her own, mixed feelings, and better than anyone, she knew how childish and stupid they were.

" Look, it's normal for mothers not to like their son's girlfriend. It's normal to feel like this."

No, it isn't, she thought. Not liking the future daughter-in-law certainly is common, but Mikoto's feelings were a lot stronger than just a biased pre-concept. She already disliked that girl even before meeting her, and the reason behind such irrational feelings was because this girl wasn't her. It was nothing personal and it was not logical either, but knowing he had chosen a girl that knew nothing of him made her heart beat faster in a certain disappointment.

That girl— the one he chose— was a stranger who had shared just a couple of months with him. She couldn't possibly know anything about Sasuke in such a short period of time, and it was ridiculous to think someone as reserved as her son was actually okay with that. There was no history between them. There were no shared memories of their younger days, no pictures of them growing up together and certainly no matching clothes bought by their mothers. It was not possible that a girl without any of those things could ever understand her stoic son.

She could never truly love him, no. Not as much as the pinkette who grew up by his side did.

Even if they were nothing but innocent and naive kids back then, the Uchiha matriarch could tell there was something growing between her son and the girl who lived nearby. Mikoto remembers the day she moved into the neighbourhood, and she also remembers how fast she and her son became friends. They were always playing together, having a great time every day after school, and having the time of their young lives as they pretended to be ninjas saving a small village from the bad guys. They grew up together, and before she knew it, their lives were completely intertwined.

Yes, that adorable, little girl was already a part of their family. She was the daughter Mikoto has always dreamed of having, and she was the only one that could bring a smile to Sasuke's pouty face. She was sweet, delicate, funny and polite, and most importantly, she was in love with her son. Even if her innocent, ten-year-old heart wasn't really aware of that, it was possible to tell she had already found her first love.

Her green eyes would shine brighter, her smile was purer and the blush that covered her cheeks only made Mikoto happier to know how lucky her son was to have a girl like that by his side. Of course, he wasn't aware of her feelings— let alone his—but she could tell it was just a matter of time before something more grew between them.

Just a few more years, she used to think, with a smile on her lips as her dark eyes lingered on them. His mother certainly couldn't wait to see their future together. However, life had other plans for those childhood friends.

It happened right after they finished high school. Both of them had turned into fine, young adults, and even if their feelings for each other were even stronger, there were other things in their lives pushing them apart. He wanted to be a lawyer. She wanted to be a doctor. And less than two months later, both of them left home in order to pursue a new future.

Mikoto was really happy for them, of course. They were chasing their dreams, and if anything, she was proud of them for battling so hard for their current positions. Still, it was sad to see their love being put on hold like that.

It was sad to see them growing apart like that.

And now, more than ever, it was sad to see that one of them had finally moved on and was trying to bury such young, innocent feelings forever by forcing himself to fall in love with a complete stranger.

A defeated sigh escaped her lips, again, and soon her fingers were massaging her temples. As a grown woman and mother of two, young men; Mikoto knew she was being ridiculous. That poor girl didn't deserve to be judged— let alone disliked— like that. She knew that judging a young lady based on nothing but the memory of younger days crossed every limit, and if anything, she was acting like a shallow teenager. The Uchiha mother hated feeling like that and she hated how unfair she was acting towards a girl she didn't even know, but there was nothing she could do about that.

She couldn't control her feelings, and she certainly couldn't control her son's heart.

Unfortunately, if anything, she could only accept his choices.

" Think positive, mom…" Itachi started, again, not giving up on trying to help his mother. " Sasuke's happy with her. She can't be that bad."

" I know that, Itachi… And I really do wanna like her and welcome her to our home, but… but—"

" But she's not Sakura-chan?"

Her eyes widened as she looked at him, clearly impressed by his deduction. Her eldest son has always been very smart, but at that moment, to say she was just surprised would be an understatement. " H-How did you know I was thinking about her?"

" Oh, come on… You used to talk about them ending up together all the time back then. You were so certain that they would eventually start dating and all… You can't seriously not be mad about it. Your Uchiha pride would never let you be okay after being proven wrong."

" It's not about being proven wrong, Itachi. It's just… It's just—"

" It's just that he chose a girl that is not the one you chose." He smirked, crossing his arms over his chest. " Admit it, mom… You're mad because, maybe, you were wrong about them. You're mad because, perhaps, they were never really meant to be together like that. You were wrong, mom… It happens."

Her eyes widened, her heart skipped a beat and shock was written all over her face. If anything, Mikoto was not expecting such words from her son at that moment. She had never even considered them in all these years they had been friends. Could it really be it? Could it really be that those two were just really good friends and nothing more? Could she really be wrong about them?

No. She didn't want to believe that. She has always been so sure they were in love and that her prediction would come true. Mikoto has always loved Sakura as a part of her family and she has never really considered a future where such thing would not be true.

She had never considered a future where Sasuke and Sakura would be just friends.

But perhaps, that was the future that awaited for them. Perhaps, Itachi was right, and perhaps, she's always been wrong.

" Itachi… " Her voice was lower now, sadness and disappointment lingering on her tongue. " Maybe you're right… I was wrong all the time. They were just kids, after all… How could I be so blind?!"

" Oh, come on, mom…" He said, taking a step closer to her and giving her a comforting squeeze on the shoulder. " Don't be so hard on yourself. Maybe they just fell out of love… It happens. I know how much you like Sakura-chan. We all like her very much and she's always going to be a part of this family… It's just that… It's just that, maybe, they were not meant to be."

" You're right…. And this girl… She has nothing to do with my silly fantasy. Oh, poor thing. I was being so unfair…"

" You did nothing wrong, mom." A chuckle escaped his lips as he watched how guilty his mother was feeling. Even if he felt sorry for her, it was still quite funny to see how fast her reactions changed after she let go of that stupid idea she's always nourished regarding Sasuke's love life.

It was a silly, innocent fantasy, for sure.

And at that moment, as soon as the doorbell rang, they all knew it was time for that fantasy to end. One way, or another.

" Tch, how does one not have the keys to his own house." They heard Fugaku muttering from the living room. Apparently, Sasuke had once again forgotten that he still had a house apart from his dorm room in college, and as always, his father couldn't help but feel a certain annoyance since he was the one that was going to have to open the damn door. " One second!"

Listening to her grumpy husband's voice, somehow, made Mikoto feel a bit more at ease. It all felt so familiar and normal that, for the first time that evening, she felt calm and excited to see her son after so long. She heard the door unlocking and she heard Fugaku's voice greeting their boy and his girlfriend. "Wow, look at you!", he said, with a surprised tone that was so unusual to his character. She heard a small, girlish giggle, and soon, her son's voice was heard, sounding like music to her ears.

He was home. Sasuke was finally home. All the rest suddenly didn't matter anymore.

Her heart started to beat faster, and before she knew it, she was already following Itachi to the front door to welcome Sasuke in. Her eldest son got there first, the sound of their hug echoing around the house, and soon, his reaction to the girlfriend also came, in a tone that was a lot more surprised than she would've expected from a person so calm like him.

" Wow! I can't believe it's you!" Itachi said, loudly and with a familiar excitement in his voice. At first, she thought that was weird, but eventually, she settled, deciding it was only Itachi's way of welcoming a nervous girl into their house.

She finally arrived at the center of the commotion, her dark eyes landing on her youngest son immediately. Her heart skipped a beat at the sight, and she couldn't help but notice how much he had grown. He wasn't exactly taller, but she could see the changes in the way his eyes had softened and the way his lips were slightly turning upwards as he looked at the girl who was currently hidden behind Itachi's tall figure.

He had matured, she could see. Her son seemed lighter, healthier… Happier.

And that, she realized, was enough to make her like that girl, whoever she was.

" Damn it, little brother… Mom will—"

" Sasuke…" Mikoto finally spoke, gathering the attention of everyone around her. Her voice was soft and delicate, and it was clear that she was getting emotional with every step she took towards her son. When he looked at her, then, it was as if her heart skipped a beat.

" Hello, mother…" He spoke, his voice set in a tone that was a lot similar to hers. His eyes— as dark as the night itself— held compassion and that same, childish innocence of his younger days. Even if no words had actually been spoken, it was clear that her son was also happy to be home with his family, and in a blink of an eye, Mikoto was wrapping her arms around him so she could finally feel the warmth of his embrace.

It took him a couple of seconds to finally answer to his mother's gesture, but soon, he was bringing her closer and accepting her affection. For he was almost a head taller than her, she settled her forehead against his shoulder, taking in how comfortable it was to have her grown-up baby in her arms after so long. She was smiling against his clothes, and she could almost feel her tears threatening to roll down her cheeks. She was just too happy at that moment, but she figured that crying would ruin the mood.

" Welcome home, Sasuke."

"Aah… I'm home, mom."

" Yes, you are." She said, letting him go so she could take a better look at him. She was smiling, at first, but suddenly, she glared at him. " Took you long enough to return home, Uchiha Sasuke! 4 months away from your family, honestly!"

" Tch, I knew this was coming." Sasuke sighed, scoffing.

" Well… you asked for it, little brother." Itachi said, crossing his arms over his chest. " You've spent 4 months without coming home, and when you finally do, you don't even apologize for that."

" Hn, I'm a busy person, okay?"

" You're never too busy for family, little brother. You should've learned that back when you didn't call for 3 weeks and mom went after you with dad's old badge." His older brother mocked, smirking evilly. More than anyone, Itachi knows how his brother doesn't really care about these little things and how easily he gets annoyed by that.

It's just too funny, Itachi would say, making both of his parents giggle at how annoyed Sasuke would get.

Seeing both of her boys already messing with each other like that made Mikoto happy, but she knew that was not the moment for nostalgia. If anything, welcoming a new member to the family meant they were taking a new step towards the future, and more than ever, with her whole family by her side, she was ready to take that step.

" Well, at least, this time, you've brought someone home with you, right, son?" The Uchiha mother said, capturing the attention of everyone around her, and surprising her elder son for suddenly sounding so excited. " Won't you introduce us to your girlfriend, Sasuke?" She saw the way Itachi smiled at her, and she knew good things were about to come.

The future shall be bright, she thought, as her boys started to move in order to finally expose the quiet, respectful girl.

And when they finally cleared her view, Mikoto realized that her bright future was also painted in that old, familiar pink.

Her dark eyes widened at the sight of the girl in front of her. Short, pink hair and bright, emerald eyes stood in front of her, and for a moment, she couldn't quite believe that scene was actually real. That girl… The one girl she had been talking about the entire morning and the girl she's always adored like a daughter was standing right in front of her, prettier than ever before. There was a soft smile decorating her rosy lips, and Mikoto noticed how she kept playing with the hem of her lime-green cardigan, a sign of nervousness she had certainly not expected from a girl that was already a part of their family.

She had grown a little taller, her body had developed curves in all the right places and her face held that youthful charm of a fine, young woman. A beautiful flower had blossomed out of that adorable bud that used to run around her house, and she just couldn't find the words to express her feelings at that moment. She was happy, she wanted to cry and everything was just too good to be but a dream of her maternal heart.

" Tch, it's not like I actually need to introduce you two… Mom, you do remember Saku—"

" Sakura-chan!" Mikoto said, excitedly, her eyes shimmering as she hugged the pinkette. " I can't believe it's you! I knew it! I knew my son wouldn't be that dumb to let you go!"

" Oi, mom, I—" Sasuke scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

" Just look at you!" She started, finally breaking their hug. " You're so beautiful! Your hair is still short and now you don't have bangs anymore! I missed you so much!"

" Aah, thank you, Mikoto-san." Sakura finally said, blushing a bit and smiling brightly. " I really missed you too! I've been running like crazy recently and I could barely come home to see both you and my mom."

" You kids are just so busy nowadays! But now you're here and you're finally dating my son! Do you remember how we used to talk a lot about you two getting together when you were just a kid!? I can't believe it actually happened right now!"

" Eh!? W-What do you mean by finally?" She blushed harder in an innocent embarrassment, clearly not prepared to have her childhood secret been spilled like that. " It was not like I was always crushing on your son back then— we were just kids, and—"

" Hn, leave her be, Sakura." Sasuke said, smirking. " She's been waiting for this day her entire life."

" He's right." Itachi said, placing a hand on his hip. " She knew this day would come even before either of you left the diapers. This is her moment."

" Stop making fun of me, Itachi! I was right! I told you Sakura-chan was the only girl for him!" Mikoto said, an air of victory enveloping her small form.

" Yeah, you really did, mom." Itachi chuckled. " I guess none of us really did see it coming today."

" Eh? Are you talking about Sakura-chan being the girlfriend?" Fugako started, his voice calm as ever. " I knew it was her. Sasuke told me right after they began dating."

" What!?" Mikoto screamed, not so loudly, as she turned towards her husband. " And why didn't you tell me!?" She turned towards her son, then, glaring at him. " And why didn't you tell me, Uchiha Sasuke! I am your mother!"

" Eh? You didn't tell her, Sasuke-kun? I thought your mother knew about it already" Sakura spoke, calmly, not entirely surprised about her boyfriend's decision.

" Tch, does it really matter now?"

" Of course!" His mother said, her hands on either side of her hips. " I can't believe you've kept her a secret from me!"

" Well, now you know it, mom." The youngest Uchiha said, annoyance in his tone for he knew his mother wouldn't let that pass so easily. " Can we eat just already?"

Even if she wanted some more answers from her son and his reasons for not telling her such thing, Mikoto knew that was not the right time. They were all gathered for a family moment, and she wouldn't ruin it because of something that small. Later, though, he wouldn't escape her. " Hn, this conversation is not over yet, young man… But I guess you're right. Let's go get you something to eat."

" Let me help you, Mikoto-san!" Sakura said, promptly taking a step closer to her mother -in-law. She was smiling purely at the older woman, and anyone could see how happy those two were to be together once more.

" Oh, of course, dear! Come on, it will be easier this way."

As she grabbed the pinkette by the hand, it was easy to tell they were both pretty excited about what was yet to come. Even if their connection had begun through Sasuke all those years ago, it was undeniable that those two had created a bond of their own. They had grown so close that, even if she wasn't her son's girlfriend, Mikoto would still carry Sakura in a very special place inside her heart. They had become great friends. Perhaps, even more than that.

They have always considered each other family.

And now, thanks to her son, it was finally official.

The dinner, then, went on smoothly and the formality Mikoto was expecting from it never really made itself present. They talked about the old times, sharing different perspectives from the same memories and they smiled a lot as they did so. She also asked how it all happened— how they happened, and her eyes certainly didn't miss the soft blush that tinged Sakura's cheeks at the mention of her own love story.

Young love, Mikoto thought, sparing a glance at her own husband. She smiled at her own memories, quickly returning her attention to the pink haired girl that was sitting across from her. As expected, her son didn't seem that interested in helping his girlfriend tell their story, so the pinkette was the one who did all the work. She told his family they met at a library downtown during a rainy day when they were both enjoying a day off from their respective classes. It wasn't too much of a coincidence for a lot of the students from both of their colleges went there, but it was certainly a nice and familiar surprise, according to Sakura.

And so, long story short, they started talking again, going out for coffee and studying together for hours into the night, until one thing led to another and they started dating. It wasn't the kind of story that gets turned into a movie or a book, but it was sweet in its own way considering that their feelings for each other had never disappeared from their hearts. Through the years, Mikoto knew they hadn't completely lost touch, but apparently, a chance encounter was what they needed to turn that friendship into something more.

Even if she knew there were a lot of very important details she was keeping out of the main story, Mikoto figured she shouldn't press on their privacy so soon. Of course, she would have other chances of knowing it all in a nearby future, but on that day, it was all about welcoming them back home. And judging by the expressions around the table, it was easy to tell things were going just fine.

It was impressive to see how well Sakura blended in. Back then, when she was a child, she used to be so shy and scared all the time, but now, she no longer seemed afraid or anxious to be around Fugaku and Itachi. In fact, she seemed quite comfortable interacting with everyone. As she talked about her college life and about her early internship, she captivated everyone around her with that youthful cheerfulness.

They liked her. All of them did, especially Sasuke.

But now, more than ever, Mikoto can see how much that innocent feeling had turned into pure love.

Her son was very subtle, but her eyes didn't miss the way he looked at the pinkette while she was talking. His dark eyes were carrying a tender shimmer to them, and even if he thought no one was noticing, Mikoto could see his fingers lingering near her shoulder as he rested his arm on the back of her chair. Never before had her seen her son that happy before, and even if he would never admit it, he was a love fool for that girl.

Her beloved son was allowing himself to feel after so long. He was in love with a wonderful, young woman and she knew their love would conquer it all.

They would be really happy, for sure. Happy, and certainly, in love.

And so, after what felt like hours, their pleasant evening finally came to an end. The sun had already parted, the coffee had been served, Itachi and Fugaku had taken care of the dishes and eventually, the pinkette announced her leave. Mikoto protested a bit and told her it was still too early, but in the end, there was no way to change her mind.

" Are you sure you don't want to stay a little longer."

" I'm sure, Mikoto-san. I really appreciate your offer, but it's already getting late."

" You can sleep here with Sasuke, dear. You guys can even have our bedroom."

" Eh?!" She blushed hard, moving her hands in front of her face in order to dismiss such dubious offer. " I-I couldn't accept it! It's your room, and Fugaku-san is also here, and—"

" Tch, look at what you're doing, mom." Sasuke started, standing next to his girlfriend and placing a hand on his hip. He shifted his attention to the girl, then, his voice lowering in the process. " You can stay here, if you want, though." He continued, looking at her with those pretty, dark eyes of his. Judging by the way her shoulders shifted, Mikoto could tell Sakura was moved by her son's words, however, the pinkette had already made up her mind.

" Thank you so much for the offer, really… But I really should go." Sakura said, a soft smile on her face as she placed a hand on Sasuke's shoulder. " It was a wonderful evening, the dinner was incredible and believe me, I would love to stay a little longer, but… But you've been away from them for so long and you all have so much to talk about. I don't wanna play the nosy girlfriend here or anything like that."

" Tch, don't be ridiculous."

" You would never be like that, Sakura-chan!" Mikoto started, trying to dismiss that silly idea. " It would really not be a problem."

" I know, I know, but… " Sakura sighed, smiling tenderly at both of them. "This is your time to be together, really. You've been away for 4 months and it wouldn't be right if I stayed. Also, my mom will kill me if I don't go home tonight." She chuckled, not really joking.

" Hn, if you say so…"

Even if it was clear that her son didn't like Sakura's decision, Mikoto, deep inside, appreciated the pinkette's decision to go home. They had all spent an amazing day together and she would love to be with her for a little longer, but if she had to be honest, she also wanted to spend some alone time with Sasuke. They had a lot of things to talk about and there were things that could only be said between a mother and her son.

It was not like it was any kind of secret or anything that could not be said in front of his girlfriend, but at that moment, she wanted to be alone with him— with her son.

And judging by her words, the Uchiha mother could tell the pinkette understood that.

Thank you, Sakura-chan.

" Well, I guess you really have to go, then." Mikoto smiled, as they were all heading out towards the front door. " But you'll come back tomorrow, right?"

" Yes. I'll come back and you can give me that old, yakisoba recipe, deal?"

" Oh, that simple thing…" Mikoto giggled. " I'll give it to you tomorrow, for sure!"

" It's a promise, then!"

" Come here, sweetie." The Uchiha mother said, pulling the girl in for a soft hug. Even if it caught Sakura by surprise, it didn't take long before the girl also hugged her mother-in-law-to-be back. Those two were really great friends, and now, as a family, they would be an even better team. " Thank you, Sakura-chan…"

She didn't understand the meaning behind those words, but deep inside, Sakura knew that was not the time to question that. Instead, then, she simply smiled thankfully, as they silently reached an agreement. " I'll see you tomorrow, then."

" Tomorrow, then."

" Hn, let me take you home, Sakura." Sasuke said, trying to sound like a real gentleman.

" Eh? Are you sure, Sasuke-kun? I can get an Uber if—"

" Tch. Don't be annoying." He scoffed, grabbing his car keys and opening the door. " Let's go."

A smile formed on her rosy lips, and after one, last goodbye, they both left, at last. After closing the door, Mikoto went straight to the window, her eldest son following her steps. Her dark eyes were set on the newest couple, and she couldn't help but smile as she saw the smiles decorating their faces.

" You should not be spying on your own son, mother."

" Knock it off, Itachi. I'm just making sure they get to the car safely."

" Yeah, right…" He smirked, watching as his younger brother leaned in to kiss her lips before opening the door for her. " I think they made it."

"Yes, they did…" She smiled, watching as the lights of the car turned on before they finally left.

" You must be really happy, right, mom? You were right, after all."

" Oh, Itachi… It's not a matter of being right. I'm just happy to see my son happy and in love…"

" Yeah, right…"

" Hn, and now we just wait for the marriage."

" Tch, you're impossible, mom."

[themyskira]

The Life of Captain Marvel - issue #1

So here we are. Issue #1 of The Life of Captain Marvel, the miniseries that was touted as a bold new origin story that would change everything we thought we knew about Carol Danvers.

And it starts strong by exploiting family violence, trauma, mental illness and traumatic brain injury for melodramatic effect, with no intention of dealing with any of these complex themes in any depth or sensitivity.

For all that, infuriatingly little actually happens in this first issue. No exaggeration, the issue actually includes a stretch of nine months wherein Carol essentially does nothing except mope and grow her hair out. The dang plot doesn’t even arrive until the final seven pages.

Content warning: This issue begins with a flashback to Joe Danvers verbally abusing and hitting his kids. I haven’t included any images, but I talk at some length about Margaret Stohl’s abysmal handling of themes of abuse and family violence. Just a heads up.

The story opens on a flashback to an idyllic childhood holiday in Harpswell, Maine. There’s a montage of Carol and her brothers flying kites, wrestling each other, splashing in the water and stuffing their faces with candy, while adult Carol muses that she used to think her family was perfect.

Then the flashback takes a turn. One of Carol’s brothers rips the kite from her hand, tearing it. Their father, Joe, descends on the boys in a rage and begins verbally abusing and physically beating them as Carol looks on, because — surprise! — it’s Traumatic Past Retcon time!

Goodbye Joe Danvers, well-meaning but hard-headed dad who’s never understood his daughter and whose approval always seems to be out of reach. Hello Joe Danvers v. 2.0, scary unpredictable drunk who hit his kids and terrorised his entire family. Aren’t comics fun?

The flashbacks are interspersed with shots of Carol in the present day, where she’s battling supervillains Tanalth and Moonstone. As the flashback progresses, present-day Carol lashes out violently, alarming friends and foes alike.

“That’s why fighting’s easier than remembering. I tell myself that if I’m strong enough… I’ll beat the memories down so hard they’ll never come back.”

What’s strange to me about this page is the way it deliberately draws a parallel between Joe, snarling and raising his fist to strike his powerless young children, and Carol, snarling and raising her fist to strike down a powerful villain. By implication, it places Carol in the role of abuser, indicating an intergenerational cycle of violence.

Which of course is never explored or discussed beyond this, because Stohl doesn’t want to actually talk about the lasting impacts and terrible toll of family violence, she just wants to exploit it for THE DRAMAS.

As Joe whales on his sons, kid!Carol tries to run to their defence, only to be held back by mother Marie, who tells her, “You’ll just make it worse. Now’s not the time.”

We will be told numerous times over the course of this book what an incredible, loving mother Marie Danvers is, and how she’s prepared to sacrifice everything for Carol. Her actions, though? Her actions consistently portray a woman whose number one interest is in not creating more work or emotional angst for herself, even when it means hanging Carol out to dry.

This is not to say that Marie isn’t a victim as well in this scenario: though she never fears for her life or safety (she could pummel Joe into the ground without breaking a sweat), it could well be that constant gaslighting and emotional abuse have left her feeling unable to oppose her husband in anything.

It could well be, but that is nuance that Stohl is not interested in exploring, and all we get throughout this miniseries is Marie making excuses for Joe’s abusive behaviour and prioritising her own comfort over Carol’s emotional wellbeing and safety.

So anyway, flashback!Marie says “Now’s not the time”, and in the present day Carol shrieks “WHEN - IS - THE TIME?!” while damn near beating Moonstone into a pulp.

The other Avengers are disturbed by this.

Iron Man: Hey, Carol? Could you maybe leave a little something on the plate for… you know… bad guy jail? Black Panther: Would you call that rage… disproportionate?

hellooooo unfortunate paternalistic implications. A female superhero has a hysterical outburst on the battlefield, while her almost exclusively male colleagues look on in bewilderment. (‘This is why women can’t be superheroes, they’re too emotional!!!’)

Cap and T’Challa have to physically pull Carol off Moonstone, as Carol begins to hyperventilate.

Adding to our list of things that this series has zero interest in exploring:

What it’s like to experience a panic attack or traumatic flashback

What it’s like to live with an anxiety disorder

What it’s like to live with trauma

The Carol of this story is not a woman living with trauma and mental illness, she is a woman who swoons hysterically whenever the narrative starts drag a bit. Her panic attacks are purely a plot device used to ratchet up the dramatic tension at convenient moments, and it’s some of the most insensitive handling of mental illness I’ve seen in comics for a while.

Next comes the obligatory scene of Carol getting a full medical in Tony’s lab, only for Tony to throw his hands up and declare, ‘welp, there’s nothing physically wrong with you, are you sure there’s not something else going on????’. Because apparently neither Tony — who has personal experience with trauma — nor Steve — who lived through a FUCKING WAR — know PTSD when it’s punching them (well, Tanalth and Moonstone) in the face.

I mean REALLY.

Tony: Look, the breathing thing is probably some kinda nervous tic.

hi, hello, person with an anxiety disorder here, please do not tell somebody having a full-blown panic attack that it’s just a ‘nervous tic’, you absolute insensitive fuckstick.

Carol: [sigh] It’s… Father’s Day. Not my favourite day of the year, you know?

waitwaitwait, so CAROL recognised that she’d triggered and experienced a traumatic flashback, but for some reason decided to play dumb about it until she’d after she’d had a pointless medical examination??

Tony tells Carol she needs to get herself sorted out or else somebody is going to get hurt, so she goes to visit her mother and younger brother Joe Junior at the family’s holiday home in Maine.

Carol flies into town past a sign that reads, “Harpswell Sound / Summer Home of Captain Marvel” Carol: [narration] Oh, brother.

‘Oh, brother’ is right. I guess at least it isn’t as embarrassing as the time Stohl introduced a D-grade Captain Marvel TV series.

“Sugar’s Donuts / Official Donut of Captain Marvel”

hoookay yep that’s a bit much now.

At the donut shop, Carol runs into childhood friend Louis Lee, who’s grown into a Designated Love Interest with an obnoxious phonetically-spelled accent

“Better keep that to yah self, Ms. Danvers. Wouldn’t wantitah get out that yah cheatin’ on us…”

I despise him already.

Carol goes up to the house and hangs out with her mother and brother. Over dinner, Marie and JJ ask her why she’s dropped by so suddenly. Carol evades and JJ blows up at her because apparently he’s been holding in some anger about how he feels she abandoned the family and didn’t even bother to come home when their dad was terminally ill. (Which, hey, here’s another potentially rich thread to explore — PITY IT NEVER COMES UP BETWEEN THEM EVER AGAIN.)

Carol shoots back that he knows full well she was avoiding home because of their abusive father, only to be interrupted by the door slamming as their mother walks out.

…eeeeeexcept apparently that was an art mistake, because the very next page is Carol chasing after her brother, the one who actually stormed out. She finds him at their father’s grave, drinking booze.

He offers his recovering alcoholic sister the bottle, and when she lightly turns it down he gripes that she’d always thought she was better than everybody else and she should feel free to piss off any time now. Then he gets into his car and Carol lets him drive home drunk like the responsible person she is.

“Part of me knew I should go after Joe Jr. I mean, nobody in my family was any good with a bottle.”

WHAT IN THE HELL, CAROL.

But nah, see, she has more important things to do, like scream at her dead father and desecrate his headstone, because that’s sure not going to upset her family further, nope.

Her little tantrum is interrupted by the sound of tyres screeching and a car plunging off a bridge because YOU FUCKING MORON you stood there and watched your brother stagger drunk into his car and made the conscious decision that ‘nah, I’m gonna let this one play out’.

and ohohohohoho how ~poetic~! He crashed right through the ‘Summer Home of Captain Marvel’

god I hate everything in this comic.

JJ is rushed to hospital, where he is diagnosed with a traumatic brain injury, leaving him in a catatonic state.

And of course, Stohl’s Carol makes it all about her-fucking-self.

“In an instant, everything changes. You ruin someone’s life… it ruins yours right back. You’d give everything to have gone after him… and acted like the hero you’re supposed to be.”

Yes, JJ is in a coma with a traumatic brain injury, but let’s talk about how his near-fatal car accident ruined Carol’s life.

Anyway— NINE MONTHS LATER.

No, really.

We just skip over nine months.

Wherein apparently Carol has been doing nothing but poor-me-ing over her brother’s hospital bed.

Like.

She gave up her entire life and career.

Stopped saving the world.

Stopped interacting with everybody.

Just sat by JJ’s hospital bed looking melancholy and growing her hair out so that comic bros would stop complaining that she looked like a lesbian.

Tony tries texting her and she turns off her phone. So he appears beside her in an explosion of pixels.

which-- how?!?

There’s no visible technology at work here, nothing to indicate what’s projecting his image or enabling the two of them to communicate. Tony might as well be speaking to Carol via magic, for all we can tell.

Christ, it’s a superhero comic, it’s not like you have to work that hard to sell it to the reader. Two lines of dialogue: ‘What the actual hell, Tony?’ ‘Well, you wouldn’t return my calls, so I [insert technobabble here].’ That’s all you need. How lazy can you get?

Tony asks her to come back to the Avengers — we miss you, we need you, this isn’t good for you, etc. — and Carol’s like, ‘nah, I’m too busy wallowing in self-pity’.

And yes, like Carol’s PTSD and panic attacks, like the family violence, JJ’s brain injury exists solely here as a plot device. It’s not a disability he lives with or a trauma he survives, it’s a vehicle to bring melodrama to Carol’s story and a weakly-fabricated excuse for Carol to stay with the family and discover what she’s about to discover.

Because now it’s time to bring the still-catatonic JJ back home. And since the downstairs living room is more accessible than his upstairs bedroom, he’ll be taking the couch, where Carol has been crashing.

Yes, even though Carol has her own childhood bedroom in this house — we see it next issue — she has been couch-surfing for nine months.  But now that somebody else has claimed her spot, she’s got to move into… JJ’s bedroom.

So she goes up the room and rather rudely starts going through her catatonic brother’s wardrobe and pulling his clothes out to make room for her own shit. Again, I cannot stress enough that she had her own bedroom in this house. She’s just… weirdly choosing to impose on everybody else.

In the wardrobe, Carol finds a box belonging to her dead father. The box contains a love letter, in Joe’s handwriting, addressed to a woman who is not his wife — along with what is obviously a piece of alien technology.

This is a comic with a goddamn identity crisis. It keeps tossing out plot hooks, only to abandon them pages later in favour of the next shiny idea.

It begins by announcing, ‘This is a story about Carol returning home and confronting her childhood trauma.’ Then it abruptly swerves: ‘wait, scratch that, this is a story about Carol struggling to hold her fractured family together after her brother is hurt in an accident she had the power to prevent’, and then, ‘hold up hold up what we meant to say was, this is a story about Carol discovering a hidden truth about her family and parentage’.

It’s like Stohl doesn’t know editing exists. Because spoiler alert: this story is not about either of those first two things. The first fifteen pages of this issue are a dead fucking weight. They do not need to be there, and in fact a lot of problems could have been solved by cutting them.

Carol decides to spend some time with her family because she’s working through some personal shit, and discovers a letter hinting that her late father was leading a double life. That’s it; that’s the story.

All these convoluted logistics around who gets the couch and who gets the bedroom? Not necessary. Again, Carol has a bedroom in this house. Since she’s not around much, it makes sense that Marie might be using it as a general storage space. So: Carol is staying in her old room and has to shift a few boxes to make space. In the process, her dad’s shoebox gets knocked loose from whatever nook it was stuffed into. THERE. EASY. DONE. PLOT UNLOCKED.

Like, the car accident actually makes it harder to get Carol to that point. The only reason I can see for it being there at all is to force the passage of time so that Carol can grow her hair out and dudebros can stop complaining that she’s unattractive. Because I guess it just never occurred to anybody that they could draw her with long hair to start with?

But ‘oh no, the aliens and the superpowers I can accept, but in the last comic I read Carol had short hair and I AM SORRY BUT there is NO WAY human hair grows that fast, this is BEYOND THE PALE’.

Oh, and can we talk about how Carol’s response to finding OBVIOUS ALIEN TECHNOLOGY is to go, ‘huh, I wonder what this is, let’s see if I can open it by smashing it repeatedly with a hammer’??

Carol: Huh. Let’s see if we can open it. [starts bashing the device wildly] Gah! Why — won’t — you— Marie: [off-panel] Carol! Can you help me with Joe’s tube? Carol: [wandering off as the device activates] Coming, Ma!

And then IMMEDIATELY GETS DISTRACTED AND WANDERS THE FUCK OFF, failing to notice that the OBVIOUS ALIEN DEVICE has suddenly activated and is now beeping ominously????

So while Carol blunders around obliviously, the obvious alien device sends a signal to a galaxy far far away, which in turn activates what is seriously and embarrassingly called a Kree Kleaner. A small spherical vessel orbiting a distant planet lights up and begin speeding towards Earth, while inside some kind of Kree cyborg gestates and grows to maturity at a rapid rate.

Meanwhile Carol sits by the sea with Digital Tony and mopes that “I knew my family wasn’t perfect… but I thought love was”.

you.

you fucking.

Look, I recognise that trauma is complicated and that family shit is even more so.  I know people process and cope with things in different ways and at different speeds. And for Carol to suddenly discover that, on top of all the grief he was causing at home, her father was leading some kind of secret life with another women, must surely feel fucking horrible and bring up a lot of deeply painful memories.

But her reaction doesn’t gel with everything Stohl has told us about Carol’s relationship with her father.

We’ve been told that Joseph Danvers was a physically and verbally abusive alcoholic who terrorised his family to the point where, to this day, Carol struggles with PTSD and anxiety attacks. We’ve been told that Carol thinks of him as a mean, violent drunk who even in death haunts her family. She doesn’t understand why her mother stayed with him or why her brother still defends him, when all he ever did was make all of them feel small and powerless.

The idea that Carol would think all of this and yet still be totally blindsided to learn that Joe and Marie’s marriage was not a true-love-fairytale-romance is utterly, outrageously laughable.

Stohl presents the letter as bombshell that overturns everything Carol thought she knew about her family, indicating that Joe was leading a secret life she never knew about. It’s not. All it is is a confirmation of everything we’re told Carol already thinks about her father: that he was a cruel, self-absorbed bastard who treated his family like crap. You know what is a fucking bombshell?

The fact that Joe Danvers apparently had personal access to OBVIOUS ALIEN TECHNOLOGY.

AND AS FOR THIS LINE.

“And like they say, families were made to be broken.”

literally nobody says this.

I even checked, just to be fair to this comic, on the off-chance that it was in fact a thing.

One of the six search results is somebody on instagram quoting this comic. The other five are all related to the title of a single playlist on 8tracks.

But hey, like they say, Margaret Stohl is a fucking hack.

[rapeculturerealities]

It’s a strange experience, watching a younger, more innocent version of yourself onscreen. It’s stranger still—surreal, even—watching it with your child when she is much closer in age to that version of yourself than you are. My friend was right: my daughter didn’t really seem to register most of the sex stuff, though she did audibly gasp when she thought I had showed my underwear. At one point in the film, the bad-boy character, John Bender, ducks under the table where my character, Claire, is sitting, to hide from a teacher. While there, he takes the opportunity to peek under Claire’s skirt and, though the audience doesn’t see, it is implied that he touches her inappropriately. I was quick to point out to my daughter that the person in the underwear wasn’t really me, though that clarification seemed inconsequential. We kept watching, and, despite my best intentions to give context to the uncomfortable bits, I didn’t elaborate on what might have gone on under the table. She expressed no curiosity in anything sexual, so I decided to follow her lead, and discuss what seemed to resonate with her more. Maybe I just chickened out.

But I kept thinking about that scene. I thought about it again this past fall, after a number of women came forward with sexual-assault accusations against the producer Harvey Weinstein, and the #MeToo movement gathered steam. If attitudes toward female subjugation are systemic, and I believe that they are, it stands to reason that the art we consume and sanction plays some part in reinforcing those same attitudes. I made three movies with John Hughes; when they were released, they made enough of a cultural impact to land me on the cover of Time magazine and to get Hughes hailed as a genius. His critical reputation has only grown since he died, in 2009, at the age of fifty-nine. Hughes’s films play constantly on television and are even taught in schools. There is still so much that I love in them, but lately I have felt the need to examine the role that these movies have played in our cultural life: where they came from, and what they might mean now. When my daughter proposed watching “The Breakfast Club” together, I had hesitated, not knowing how she would react: if she would understand the film or if she would even like it. I worried that she would find aspects of it troubling, but I hadn’t anticipated that it would ultimately be most troubling to me.

I had what could be called a symbiotic relationship with John during the first two of those films. I’ve been called his muse, which I believe I was, for a little while. But, more than that, I felt that he listened to me—though certainly not all the time. Coming out of the National Lampoon school of comedy, there was still a residue of crassness that clung, no matter how much I protested. In the shooting script of “The Breakfast Club,” there was a scene in which an attractive female gym teacher swam naked in the school’s swimming pool as Mr. Vernon, the teacher who is in charge of the students’ detention, spied on her. The scene wasn’t in the first draft I read, and I lobbied John to cut it. He did, and although I’m sure the actress who had been cast in the part still blames me for foiling her break, I think the film is better for it. In “Sixteen Candles,” a character alternately called the Geek and Farmer Ted makes a bet with friends that he can score with my character, Samantha; by way of proof, he says, he will secure her underwear. Later in the film, after Samantha agrees to help the Geek by loaning her underwear to him, she has a heartwarming scene with her father. It originally ended with the father asking, “Sam, what the hell happened to your underpants?” My mom objected. “Why would a father know what happened to his daughter’s underwear?” she asked. John squirmed uncomfortably. He didn’t mean it that way, he said—it was just a joke, a punch line. “But it’s not funny,” my mother said. “It’s creepy.” The line was changed to “Just remember, Sam, you wear the pants in the family.”

My mom also spoke up during the filming of that scene in “The Breakfast Club,” when they hired an adult woman for the shot of Claire’s underwear. They couldn’t even ask me to do it—I don’t think it was permitted by law to ask a minor—but even having another person pretend to be me was embarrassing to me and upsetting to my mother, and she said so. That scene stayed, though. What’s more, as I can see now, Bender sexually harasses Claire throughout the film. When he’s not sexualizing her, he takes out his rage on her with vicious contempt, calling her “pathetic,” mocking her as “Queenie.” It’s rejection that inspires his vitriol. Claire acts dismissively toward him, and, in a pivotal scene near the end, she predicts that at school on Monday morning, even though the group has bonded, things will return, socially, to the status quo. “Just bury your head in the sand and wait for your fuckin’ prom!” Bender yells. He never apologizes for any of it, but, nevertheless, he gets the girl in the end.

If I sound overly critical, it’s only with hindsight. Back then, I was only vaguely aware of how inappropriate much of John’s writing was, given my limited experience and what was considered normal at the time. I was well into my thirties before I stopped considering verbally abusive men more interesting than the nice ones. I’m a little embarrassed to say that it took even longer for me to fully comprehend the scene late in “Sixteen Candles,” when the dreamboat, Jake, essentially trades his drunk girlfriend, Caroline, to the Geek, to satisfy the latter’s sexual urges, in return for Samantha’s underwear. The Geek takes Polaroids with Caroline to have proof of his conquest; when she wakes up in the morning with someone she doesn’t know, he asks her if she “enjoyed it.” (Neither of them seems to remember much.) Caroline shakes her head in wonderment and says, “You know, I have this weird feeling I did.” She had to have a feeling about it, rather than a thought, because thoughts are things we have when we are conscious, and she wasn’t.

Thinking about that scene, I became curious how the actress who played Caroline, Haviland Morris, felt about the character she portrayed. So I sent her an e-mail. We hadn’t seen or spoken to each other since she was twenty-three and I was fifteen. We met for coffee, and after we had filled each other in on all the intervening years, I asked her about it. Haviland, I was surprised to learn, does not have the same issues with the scene as I do. In her mind, Caroline bears some responsibility for what happens, because of how drunk she gets at the party. “I’m not saying that it’s O.K. to then be raped or to have nonconsensual sex,” Haviland clarified. “But . . . that’s not a one-way street. Here’s a girl who gets herself so bombed that she doesn’t even know what’s going on.”

There was a time in my early twenties when I had too much to drink at a party and ended up in a bedroom sitting on the edge of a bed with a producer I didn’t know, lightheaded and woozy. A good friend, who had followed me, popped her head in the door a couple of minutes later and announced, “Time to go now, Molly!” I followed her out, trying not to stumble, and spent the rest of the night violently ill and embarrassed—and the rest of my life grateful that she had been there, watching out for me, when I was temporarily incapable of watching out for myself. I shared the story with Haviland, and she listened politely, nodding.

Haviland, like me, has children, and so I decided to frame the question hypothetically, mother to mother, to see if it changed her point of view. If one of our kids had too much to drink, and something like that happened to one of them, would she say, “It’s on you, because you drank too much”? She shook her head: “No. Absolutely, positively, it stays in your pants until invited by someone who is willing and consensually able to invite you to remove it.” Still, she added, “I’m not going to black-and-white it. It isn’t a one-way street.”

After our coffee, I responded to an e-mail from Haviland to thank her for agreeing to talk to me. Later that night, I received another note. “You know,” she wrote, “the more I think of it this evening, oddly, the less uncomfortable I am with Caroline. Jake was disgusted with her and said he could violate her 17 ways if he wanted to because she was so trashed, but he didn’t. And then, Ted was the one who had to ask if they had had sex, which certainly doesn’t demonstrate responsible behavior from either party, but also doesn’t really spell date rape. On the other hand, she was basically traded for a pair of underwear . . . Ah, John Hughes.”