#whoops it's like I wrote a whole essay or something haha🤭💜💚

[jslittlebirdie]

First of all, please excuse my message being so late again. Today was once again a busy day for me. And I'm warning you in advance that my babbling is suuuuuper long and everything, pfft.

I'm so happy for you. Fluffy feelings are the absolute best. I hope it stays that way for you, my friend. He loves you so much and he'd do anything and everything to protect you. You're his safe haven. And inspiration for writing too? That's so so amazing, darling. I hope you get to write down all your ideas. Heh, I'm excited and all ears if you ever want to share a little with me. That is if you can. I love how your mind works, darling. He's the bestest muse ever.

Again, reading your gush made me smile so big omg. The love you have for him is so wholesome and wonderful and adorable. It gives me all the fluffy and warm feelingsas well. I could listen to you guys forever. And I mean it. I wish I could give you a longer and more detailed answer, I wish he could give you an answer, but yeah... Maybe he isn't this good at telling you, but he loves the way you care for him so deeply. All the tenderness and kindness you give him. All the gentle and soft touches. The kisses, whisperd declarations of love and shared affection. It makes his heart melt. He finally found someone he can trust, someone who doesn't hurt him, someone who accepts and loves him for him, someone who really cares for him and wants the best for him. Maybe you can't change his past, but you can make sure that his now and future will be better. Together. (Excuse me while I'm making my silly heart ache with love and sadness at the same time. I'm sure you know what I mean.) He is forever grateful that he has you and he will always hold onto you. He's yours just as much as you are his. One of my all time favorite couples. You really are made for each other. Thank you for loving him and for letting him love you. Well, I could gush about you forever.

Oh my, thank you for all your kindness. And yeah, you always remind me of my days omg. I'm so endlessly grateful to you for that and all your love. Pffft I just noticed that Eddie and I will have an anniversary on my birthday in June. Anyway. Thank you for all your patience, I'm glad to hear that you still want to read it when I'm done with it. And yes, I was thinking something similar. I've been thinking about the best way of posting it. I will totally keep that in mind, my dear friend. Yeah, I understand it... You're my friend as well and I love you very much too. It was...something to say the least. We both know... It still breaks my heart to read all this. Please promise to take care of yourself? Your loves won't leave you, ever. They're always there for you to help you and love on you. Trust me. They can't be without you for long. Especially with their chaotic selfs, right? Hehe. And I'm still here for you if I can, I promise. I know it wasn't your intention and you don't have to tell me anything. As long as you're okay I'm happy. I care about you a lot and just wish you all the best. Please don't be too hard on yourself. We're still good, I love you lots. I hope one day everything will work out for the better, my friend.

As for your vent. Please never think you're bothering me or anything, you aren't. Never. I'm here to listen and maybe even help a bit from afar. Talk, vent, or gush away. This offer always stands, my friend. I'm here for you. You're important to me and you're not alone. And I'm so incredibly proud of you for trying, for doing your best and that you keep going despite everything. And I want you to know that you are enough. Please don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You're amazing. You're hardworking, talented, kind and smart. You really are smarter than you think you are. I think I know how you feel. It's a bit similar for me. There's always so much to do, new stuff keeps coming up, but the day only has so many hours. But you are right, one step after the other. One day after the other. A very wonderful girl told me to eat the elephant one bite at a time. You're doing your best and your best is always enough. Stress sucks and so do all the other things. It's not fair of people to say these things and treat you this way. Unexpected things happened and it is human to react this way. Your feelings are valid. Just between the two of us, I probably would've reacted similarly. It would've been better if they explained things to you in a calm voice and comforted you. I'm sorry you had to experience this. And talking to yourself is a good way to ground yourself and it is indeed some kind of coping mechanism. And you're very much allowed to do this in private, darling. It's way better than bottling up all your feelings. Oh, and you're right. I hope it's not inappropriate for me to say that, but they should be more understanding. Forcing you to talk when you don't want to and can't is not okay. Maybe they mean to help you, but it's not helpful at all. You will talk when you're ready. After this whole situation you need some time to decompress. And like I already said, understanding and communication is the key. Well, I'm sorry, sweetheart... Maybe things aren't as bad as you thought they are, but your feelings are still valid. You know, your boys would never do anything like that. They love you and they care about you. Deeply. They understand and they are there for you to help you. You're not a burden or pathetic or whatever. If you need to cry, they will hold you and try to comfort you. If you want to talk, they will listen. If you just need their closeness, they won't go anywhere until they know that you're better. Lots of cuddles and kisses. You don't upset them, darling. What does upset them is when you are sad and stressed. They want to help you and give you their love if you just let them. And of course they would try to cheer you up, because your smile is the prettiest thing they've ever seen. Lots of silly and goofy jokes, I bet both of them are really good at that, pfffft hehe. I really, really hope that your next days will be better. You don't deserve any of that. Please try to be as gentle with yourself as you can. You're absolutely wonderful, inside and out. Here, take all my hugs and strength. I'm rooting for you. And I'm always here for you.

Well, and a bit more happy thing. Thank you very much for your recommendations. I mean it. I'm really interested in everything. This is some random babbling, but I started a playlist for Eddie a while ago. Songs I believe he'd like, songs that make me think of him etc. And I always add new things. I really like Metallica now. And Iron Maiden. Ha! I already added some of the Metallica songs you mentioned, thank you very much. And I will totally listen to all the other ones. Oh my, you're right. The Unforgiven made me think of J too. And Fuel is perfect for him, hehe. Personally, Nothing Else Matters always makes me think of my loves. Secret. I saw a record of the Foo Fighters a few days ago and it totally made me think of you because you mentioned it. I love you lots my friend. It means a lot to me that you share these things with me, I adore your taste in music and I'm always happy to learn new things. And your reminders always give me the fluffiest and bestest feelings, I'm so endlessly grateful for you. To know you and be friends with you.

Wow, this post is giant, but I had to tell you. Well if I could I'd say even more, but we both know. I love you and I'm hugging you right now. I hope you are doing well. I'm thinking of you and I'm here for you whenever you need me. Thank you so much. As always, get you some more cuddles and kisses, and please keep them close. They love you so so much.