#who am i to defy internet superstition

[phemonoi]

Ranting about the issue between spirituality vs science

Currently I've been having this sudden need for scientific approval. I was the other day researching on youtube, and stopped to watch an interview with this swiss theoretical physicist who claims having solved the problems with the unified field quantum theories. I was very excited while watching his interview, specially because his research is closely linked to spiritual basis. However, while looking for more information on google about him, I found he's apparently a fraud (in opinion of classical theorists). As with any prominent scientific discovery that defies traditional/orthodox standards, atheists and “rationalists” come to diminish any evidence, or inclusion of spirituality, in any scientific circle. I began researching more, because I know that some of the most important scientists in modern history happened to be spiritual people, or at least give these philosophies the benefit of the doubt. I don't know why, but it is drastically conflicting for me to not find a middle ground between these thoughts.

I am certain about my beliefs. I know I've been going through a mental awakening, and perhaps this sudden need for intellectual approval is part of that, or the necessity to have an intellectual background in order for me to understand this. Yesterday I couldn't shake off the over-intellectualization of this matters, I kept on asking and researching, and the more I read the more I stumbled upon scientists and scholars that are not just incredibly closed minded reductionists, but they're also dogmatic and extremely biased.

I have no science —I'm a poet. I feel. I value the abstraction of thoughts and the realm of dreams more than anything else, I've noticed. The moment I was starting to get tempted into the ideas of radical questioning and uncertainty, I felt myself going back into sadness. I can't risk my light like that. I'm young and confused, but I won't risk my beliefs and my experiences and dreams because an arrogant jerk is insulting me while throwing at me his memorization of Newton's laws and other unbreakable facts. As I said, mainstream science becomes incredibly dogmatic and that goes against the Godsʼ value for freedom of thought, philosophy and open mindedness, I remembered. “Judge and discern. Be skeptic. Question everythig, little one. But do not condemn, ever. Remain open”. By the way, I asked Apollo for help on this. If I ever get into the study of the physical plane I will need to have both Apollo and Athena by my side in order to not break myself. I'm sensitive, people.

These things tend to not conflict any other spiritual person I know. And I want to become like them —unshakable, stoic. I suppose that I'm just too curious. It's very dangerous to dive into the ocean of the internet with the intention of cultivating oneself. That was a really bad idea. I know this is obvious, but I had come to rely too much on online sources. I won't anymore. I will study these things myself.

Another thing I noticed is that mainstream critics of religion and spirituality tend not just to be western biased and european white males, but they also talk about every other religious school as if it was the same as Christianism and its branches. It's common to hear them quote Ancient Greece and state that these people believed in their myths as facts, and now they're obsolete to us. This assumption alone is enough to discard any religion scholar that thinks that way. It's greatly diminishing. It's ridiculizing. Not just for Ancient Greece but for any other culture that didn't fit into a Christian dogma. To not distinguish between the mythos of a religion, the actual cult of that religion, and it's independent philosophical doctrine is a big mistake. Specially when it comes to polytheistic religions, because the ortopraxis would greatly depend on the deity that was being worshipped. And with this basis, they go on assuming that modern spirituality is just as stupid and obsolete as the ancient stories. You see them label phenomena and different schools as “paranormal” or “supernatural” without stopping to study the actual implications of those labels. You see them quoting the ancient philosophers wrongly, only the words that serve them, with fallacies, and disregarding the spiritual and religious inspiration behind these philosopher's discoveries and schools of thought. They make fun of witchcraft and magick by demeaning the instruments we use, our rituals, our theory, our understanding of energy. While I do agree we need to reform our lexis for us to have a clearer differentiation between the physical, exclusively scientific, definition of energy and the energy we refer to, and perhaps develop a more ordered theory, the need of rational reductionists to completely discard and discriminate other ideas under the label of “superstition” is an abuse.

Modern scientific research is dominated by toxic political propaganda. You can't even look for information up in Wikipedia and other online mainstream enciclopedias without your beliefs being labeled as absurd and childish, discriminating minorities and idolizing european/american scholars.

And I'm fucking done, people, because anyone that isn't a self-proclaimed atheist is automatically thrown under the bus and ignored. I once had this discussion with a chemestry teacher, about Einstein and stuff, and while he was pointing at his beliefs on quantum mechanics, I also quoted him on pantheism and spirituality and my teacher automatically went “what Einstein thought about God isn't important”. I've also gotten into arguments with other professors that claim “science has succeeded over philosophy” like, man, there's no such thing! science is philosophy!

But whatever, I think I'm just too much of a libra mercury with a third house virgo.