#whine whine whine I'm being complainy

[skyward-floored]

I don't wanna pack a lunch for tomorrow my head hurrrrrrts

[softlyfiercely]

i recognize that I'm being a bit hypocritcal by writing a negative/complainy post about how we all have to get better at being less negative/complainy but like

we as a queer, neurodivergent, terminally online general population have got to get better at having conversations. like jesus christ if you are a plus one at a small gathering, you need to read the fucking room and maybe not first thing bring up your parent's addictions? or your health issues and "access needs"? or comment on how someone else's hair dye is fading (fucking rude?)

can you find literally anything to talk about besides cringey anecdotes about your toxic family dynamics? can we hear about something besides how unpleasant your roommate is? come the fuck ON, people!

"oh but i'm tired of masking" "oh but i only want friends who can be present to the real me" "oh but i have Bad At Small Talk disease"

GET OVER YOURSELVES! Learn to have a human conversation! This is not a goddamned therapy session! Knowing that you have a challenge or a weakness in one area is supposed to give you the information to work on, or work around that, not just shrug and demand that everyone put up with your bullshit because you're god's specialest creature!

every online community i try to join is the same way! it's just a bunch of people whining! the vent channel is always the most active by far! every forum for people who share my interests is just a bunch of moaning about The State Of Things. does anyone know how to HAVE FUN anymore? can we talk about things without bumming each other out?

if someone mentions going out to eat, you do not need to start listing local places with ongoing labor disputes! if someone wants to talk about a TV show, you do not need to wince and inform them that the producer "got me-too-ed." for the love of god! is this fun for you? are you having fun? is this really what you want to do all the time forever?

and maybe the solution is for me to hang out with more "normie" people, but they...don't really Like or Get me either. somehow i've managed to become too normie for the weirdos and too weird for the normies, which is a really lonely place to be and frankly rather unnecessary - can no one just vibe out appropriately anymore?

[dgaftilwedie]

✮ updated intro!! ✮

hai!!!! my name's kira (pronounced kai-ruh, this is very important). im 18, my pronouns are they/it, n this is my bloggington :3 WOOOOOO

✮ interests!! ✮

my "unholy trinity" (aka my favorite things ever teehee) is jojo's bizarre adventure (especially vento aureo), saw, and the band ghost!! that being said i am also very very VERRYYYYY annoying about mark hoffman!!!

i'm also super into smiling friends, black christmas (1974) and slashers in general (do NOT ask me about billy lenz, i will not shut up), cod wwii, danganronpa, creepypasta, bioshock, meteos, criminal minds, breaking bad, five nights at freddy's, postal, metalocalypse, resident evil, the binding of isaac, mouthwashing, and the scott pilgrim series :3

my asks are always open so please feel free to talk to me abt any of my interests!!!!!!

writing is literally my favorite thing to do, and i do post some of it on here. my ao3 is @//kittieglitter if you'd like to read some of the stuff i have posted on there!! it's also linked at the bottom of this post hehe if there's something you'd like me to write, feel free to request it on here!! im usually super down to write anything ;3

✮ important stuff ✮

don't talk to me if your gross i don't associate with yucky people 💕

im not an nsfw account but i DO post nsfw things every now and then. i also swear a lot and occasionally use slurs i can reclaim, so if any of this is an issue, please interact at your own discretion!!

if you wanna be friends, that's totally cool!! im a little bit awkward sometimes but just come into my dms/asks n start yapping :3

✮ tags n my other socials ✮

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/user/ptxm3fe436z4tvccg86syyy02

quotev: https://www.quotev.com/iswalloworbeez

ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittieglitter

letterboxd: https://boxd.it/7KQgr

my personal tag is #kira moments, my tag for asks is #askies :33, i answer a lot of those like 100 question post things so my tag for that is #kira's answering questions. again. i'm also a certified complainer so all of my complainy posts are #kira's whining :P uhm... if you wanna hear about my characters, they're all tagged under #ocs!!! and i think that's it for my like, important tags :3 this will be added to as necessary

[ahiddenpath]

Life Update

Life chat beneath the cut. I feel like this one is a bit on the whiney complainy side, but it is where I am now, so I'm keeping it for posterity, lol! But don't read if you're not down for some whine and cheese xD

So I took the last week off from work. I was frustrated, because I didn't go anywhere- it was a staycation. We opted for that mostly because I was going to lose my gd mind if I didn't get some time off. I get 3 weeks off per year, plus a week closure around Christmas "made of" federal holidays that we do not get, so I try to optimize my time off. But... I didn't have the brain space to do anything, and also, as I tried to plan things... Holy damn, everything is so much more expensive than it was even like three years ago.

But now I'm further frustrated because I spent the vast majority of the week just doing damned chores and household projects. Like, I told myself I would stop doing any chores yesterday, but I still spent until 2 PM exercising and doing "a few quick things." The same thing happened today. I'm kind of in, like, a horrible sort of awe of how long shit takes, man. For example, it took my husband and I about 2 hr to take down a broken ceiling fan that was 30 years old and not very user friendly and replace it with a new one. It took me an hour with a hair drier and a scraper to remove like 2.5 cm of hot glue from a doll's head (holding her removable eyes in place) so I could send her out to be painted. And I spent 40-90 min outside for like 8-12 days weeding and doing some basic yard work to prep for a mulch delivery.

I'm trying to be more fit recently. I am, ah. A very unfit human. I think I somehow have not mentioned this in the 12 years of this blog, but... I've had a million surgeries on my hip and spent roughly age 6 months to 2 yrs in a body cast, then until roughly age 4 in physical therapy to learn to move around. I'm clumsy and can just, like, fall over unprompted, I assume because of all that. I don't have the full range of movement in my lower body, so doing physical things can be... Really daunting. I always put exercise and mobility training off.

And of course, it's starting to bite my ass, lmao. I recently learned that humans begin losing muscle mass in their 30s, meaning that weight training is essential. I also learned that using a machine to exercise (like an elliptical) is only good for cardiovascular health. The machine takes on a lot of the... strain?? Work?? Of moving, meaning you aren't working your body in the same way as when you just... Walk. It's meant to help you work out longer, so you can develop your cardiovascular system. (Incidentally, this is why walking and hiking are great exercise).

That's why I took on a lot of the gardening/yard work. I did clear out all of the weeds! And the way my soreness decreased over the days means that I did something good for my body.

But, like. The amount of time caring for your body takes is absolutely gobsmackingly unreal. Holy shit god damn! I've always struggled to keep the balls of work, mental health, creativity, physical health, and social health in the air, not touching on chores and stuff. The physical ball is the one I always put down first.

But I only get this one body, and the American healthcare system is a nightmare. So... Yeah, the priorities need to shift here. My foot has been hurting for a few weeks, now, and it happened last year after Japan, too. It's time to actually go to the doctor for that.

I am sensing more and more that I need to give less to work, too. That's difficult for someone like me to do, because I always feel a deep need to do my best with everything. But... Working this hard just isn't sustainable, and it isn't as if I'm rewarded over someone in the same position who does less.

I haven't had much of an opportunity to rest or do anything creative this week, despite being off. And I'm just as distressed by the fact that um... Just being gone at work from 8:20 AM-5:50 PM every day makes it impossible to do the tasks that built up over the last 3-4 years of being in this home. You know, sometimes people tell me, "But what would you do if you didn't have a job? I'd go crazy!" And I'm like- DUDE. DUDE! I could exercise, walk, work on house projects, and do chores all day every day for like three years and still have stuff to do! That doesn't even touch the personal projects and hobbies I want to work on.

Hopefully, I can figure out some kind of balance that works for me and is healthy. I wish you all the best, my dears <3

[kadssp]

Hey, I'm sorry if I was coming off complainy about Springtrap, I was just trying to express my thoughts on that particular subject. 😓 You're the author here, after all! I'm happy to read whatever you put out and the decision is yours to make!

You don't have to answer this one or anything, I just wanted to apologize if I came off as complaining. I honestly don't intend to. If I ever get out of line feel free to call me out on it! With any of them! I'm not always the best at putting words together, and the last thing I want is to think I'm just sharing thoughts but you feel like I'm being pushy or anything. You're a great writer and you seem like a really neat person overall, too- I don't want to make you feel bad!

I'll try to be more aware of my phrasing in the future, too, but don't hesitate to post something if I cross a line! I really like your stuff and your blog, and I'd hate to make you ever think otherwise. -🎁

nonoo you’re fine sweetheart! it seemed a lil like you could’ve been upset with the idea but i honest mentioned a tentacle dick as a joke💀 so i didnt take it as complaining rather then as you had a different idea than me!

but i have seen people straight up complaining about what i write,,,, like they cant just go write something they’d enjoy themselves. yes i do take peoples requests and i write them but it’s because it’s something i want to write and what i had ideas for. it’s just overwhelming how many complaints i get over fics i take time to write which i mean i shouldnt even be saying anything about it but yk. if i thought you were complaining i would’ve pointed it out by now and blocked if it became rude, i’ve blocked a few anons who have just been whining about useless shit so dw dear youre fine :(