#when i'm talking about misogyny and the erasure of abuse and stuff i just mean as a whole of course

[girlbosstom]

can you elaborate on that post you made where you said there's a tumblr version of Tom and Shiv and the version of Tom and Shiv on the show and they're very different? I think I agree but I'm curious

Translation: can you please smack this bear with a firepoker? SDKGLJDSHGLKJSDGH

But yes sure.

I see a lot of interpretations that these two are like... star crossed lovers whose relationship is only failing because of the world they live in.

But I don't think that's like.... Remotely true. I actually think it's the opposite I see them as two incredibly incompatible individuals who are only together BECAUSE of the world they live in.

I also just like.... don't love the trivialization of either of their actions in the marriage. They aren't a cringe UWU fail marriage to me I know people use it as a joke which is fine and often funny but that's definetly like, not all they are, you feel?

But in reality It's an abusive and toxic situation that makes me uncomfortable to watch (which i feel like is the point). And I absolutely despise the justification of ones actions by saying the other has done bad things too.

3.8 was like bone chilling and very icky and like, the fact that Shiv told Tom he was being manipulative after he expressed he felt uncomfortable with her behavior during sex eliminates any uwu star-crossed factor for me forever it wipes it off the map.

And I really do think gender and misogyny plays a role in the way people view the marriage. It's a fascinating rorsach blot to me. And I'm not saying everyone with these views must feel this way but I feel like when people think Shiv is this like, evil "bitch" demon woman with no reasoning behind her actions (though still unjustified) and Tom has done no wrong (he has. did you see retired janitors?!) there's probably misogyny there.

But I also see a lot of people viewing Shiv's emotional abuse towards Tom as like... excusable or justifiable or like, not a big deal, that feels like a can of worms about the way patriarchal society trivializes these situations when they happen to men.

Also the idea that Tom is in it strictly for social climbing purposes is weird to me. It's a part of it, but I think both his response to signing a prenup and his proposal to get out of the Waystar world with Shiv are both signs that it's not just about that.

And ANOTHER THING! just in general. I've seen a lot of people get defensive at the interpretation that Shiv isn't in love with Tom. Which i kind of think is bullshit because I feel like that's a very common interpretation and theres like, a lot to back it up in text. I think there's love there. I think she loves Tom, but it's like what Sarah Snook has said, she loves what Tom does for her.

My interpretation is that they are incompatible in almost every way and I think they both idealized each other without communicating with eachother at all. And I think the only way either of them have a remote shot at happiness is a divorce.